Reasons that I Laugh and Breathe
by klikeszombies
Summary: AU. Brittany goes to college and meets Santana and the rest of New Directions. Even though life has been hard so far, and even though bad things still happen, she regrets nothing that has brought her here. Please read first authors note for more information!
1. Chapter 1

**AN:** It's an idea and another story.

Disclaimer: I don't own anything. I don't claim to own anything. I don't make money off of any of the things I don't own. Also, the title comes from an e.e. cummings poem and I definitely don't own that either.

I don't know what to say about this story. I hope you like it. I don't know how long it will be, I do know i have a plan for a while and then we'll see what happens. Suggestions? Comments? Concerns?

Oh yeah, warning. It's G!P y'all. If you don't like it, that's ok, don't read it. Just thought I'd try it out.

* * *

She knows, fundamentally, that everything has changed. It's the first week of classes, her first year of college and Brittany is excited. She's nervous because she wants this to be different than high school. She doesn't want to be made to play some popularity game and "win" she guesses, at the expense of watching other people lose. People who never deserved to feel like losers. But this is a new place, and she doesn't need to bring any of the bad things from home with her.

She had seen a flier for a campus involvement fair on the college green today. She thought she'd go because, well mostly because she didn't have anything else to do. That and her new roommate, whom she still wasn't totally sure about, was in the room doing vocal exercises and Brittany felt weird just sitting there. So she finds herself walking towards the rows of tables and students with cautious optimism. In high school student involvement defined you. Cheerleaders and jocks were on top, Glee club and AV nerds at the bottom, with everyone else just sort of filling in the middle. She thinks she would have liked Glee club, but her sister who was a senior when she was a freshman, strictly forbade it, and forced Brittany onto the cheerleading squad with her. And once you were in, well that was kind of it. What was it that coach always said? Blood in. Blood out.

It's with less than fond memories of the behavior of her fellow cheerleaders in mind that causes apprehension to swell in her chest when she sees a group of girls at a table in cheerleading uniforms. She watches them for a few minutes and notices that two of them are laughing with some guys in the Foreign Language Club, and another one just high fived a very effeminate looking boy at a booth called LGBTA. She's not sure what that stands for, but he is wearing an amazing sweater. He notices her looking at him and beckons her over. "Hello, my name is Kurt! I'm a sophomore and secretary of the LGBTA. What's your name?"

"Hi...um.. Brittany. Nice to meet you. What does L…G…B" She reads the letters of the sign.

"T and A! Oh my god do you get it, T and A. Never mind. Inappropriate. It stands for Lesbians, Gays, Bisexual, Transgender, and Allies. Do you fit anywhere in there?"

Brittany nods. She supposes she's bisexual. Although she feels as though that implies that gender has anything to do with it at all, which she's pretty sure it doesn't. She just likes people. Certain people anyway.

Kurt takes her nod as a sign and continues. "Oh well, wherever you fall, you're welcome to come to our meetings! They're held on Thursdays at 8pm in room 201 in the University Union. Here's a flier. It's a great way to meet new friends… or you know, new significant others." He winks at her. She takes the flier and thanks Kurt. Brittany reckons she might like him and hopes that she sees him again. Although she's not sure if she'll be going to this club. For one her major has a lot of night time rehearsals, and for another he mentioned meeting significant others. And well, that's the opposite of anything she wants right now.

She has a hard time not thinking about her last relationship still. It was really only her first as well. She'd met him freshman year, and he seemed nice enough. He wasn't shy and awkward like a lot of the other boys, he joined the football team right around the same time she joined the Cheerios. He'd flirted with her for a year and a half before, at the insistence of her mother of all people, she finally agreed to go out with him. Brittany and Tommy made perfect sense it seemed. Brittany didn't think so. She kind of had a thing for this girl in her math class, but when she told her sister, her sister told her that her parents wouldn't ever approve, and plus…."doesn't that Tommy boy like you?"

And so it began. She can't remember a time ever feeling happy or enthusiastic about her relationship. Sometimes he was nice to her, and those times weren't to bad as long as she could pretend they were friends. But then he'd do something to mess it up. Her first kiss with him was at a party, he was drunk. She wasn't drinking, the alcohol made her throat burn and she was sure her parents would find out. He forced her to kiss him in front of all of his friends because they'd been making fun of him because they hadn't even kissed yet. She had done it, because he looked so angry when she said she didn't think it was a good idea. And she smiled, and stayed sort of near him the rest of the night. But when she got home she cried. She wasn't totally sure why, she didn't even think it was that big of a deal. It's just that she'd been hearing songs and stories about first kisses her whole life and she was pretty sure it shouldn't make her feel the way that kiss made her feel. Exposed and wrong.

To this day she knows the only reason she stayed with him was because every time she'd start to pull away he'd come to her house and her mom and dad would talk about how amazing he was and how they'd get married. If she brought it up to her mother that she thought maybe she didn't want to be with him, she'd tell her that he was the best she'd ever do, and she'd be stupider than she already was to leave him. That any such ideas should be whole-heartedly dismissed. Brittany felt whole-heartedly dismissed. A few times he drank to much and would get rough with her, slapping her and pushing her. She was pretty sure that wasn't ok, and when she told her mom about that, her mom said he'd grow out of it. That boys will be boys. She thought that he might do it to feel more like a man.

She was broken from her musings because she suddenly realized she was at the door to her dorm room. She went into the building and made her way to her room passively noticing the brightly colored door decorations and billboards advertising clubs and meetings. She was relieved to hear (or not hear) her roommate was done singing. She wondered if she was there at all, until she walked in the room and saw Rachel lying on her bed.

"Hey Brittany how were classes?"

"Ok. Nothing new yet so…boring I guess?" Rachel looked as though she wasn't really listening. Brittany was kind of used to that.

"That's nice. Listen I wanted to let you know that my first in a series of auditions is on Friday, and since I am a freshman, I wasn't able to get a practice room in order to do my vocal exercises so I will need to practice extensively in the room on Thursday night. Is there somewhere else you can go? Do you have any friends?" She spoke to Brittany, the last two sentences, simply as if she wasn't sure she was following along. She wanted to respond back do you have any friends? Because she was pretty sure that there was no way Rachel could. She wasn't very nice, but she was very full of herself. But she didn't. She just mumbled that she'd be out of the room, and went over to her dressers to get some gym clothes and head to the gym.

After working out for a few hours she felt a little better. A little more optimistic. She should be happy, she knows. She's away from her family, high school, Tommy, pretty much everything that had made her feel bad. Even Rachel isn't really that bad to be around. She gets back to the room and Rachel is gone, at the library according to her color coded very detailed schedule she made sure Brittany had a copy of. She went over to her dressers to grab pajamas so she could shower and her eyes fell on a piece of paper. "LGBTA meeting! Every Thursday at 8pm!" Well, she has to be out of the room anyway, maybe she'll go. Nothing needs to come of it, she could just make new friends. That Kurt boy would certainly be there, and he seemed really nice. So she decided that she'd go. Because this is a new opportunity to do things the way she wished she could have always done them.

Thursday rolled around quickly. All of her classes had started to pick up except her dance classes. She wasn't one to brag, and she'd never say it out loud but she had an idea that she might be the most advanced student in her year. It's probably a blessing that her dance classes aren't going to kill her because her other classes might. She was already pretty sure she'd need a tutor for her history class. She decided that she'd go home and change after her 3:00 dance class, and then go to the library to work on homework. Then she'd drop her stuff off in her room and go to the meeting. She was a little bit nervous, not enough to distract her in dance class or anything, but just enough to weigh on her. She got back to the room and showered and got dressed but not to dressed up. She wore tight skinny jeans and wedge sandals with a white flowy top. She pulled her hair back, made sure she had all her homework and left again.

She managed to get most of it done by time she had to leave the library to go drop her stuff off and get to the meeting. When she got back she could hear Rachel (quite loudly) from down the hall. She got to her room and dropped her stuff off giving a Rachel a small wave but doing her best not to disturb the singer. She made her way to where the meeting was playing with her keys in her hand nervously. It wasn't meeting new people that made her nervous, it was that she didn't really know what to expect.

She walked into a room filled with couches, chairs, and a fair amount of people. She found a chair in a corner off to the side that seemed like a good place for her and sat down. A few moments later she spotted Kurt, but wasn't sure he'd remember her so she didn't approach him. But then he saw her and came bounding over. "Brittany I'm so glad you showed up! I didn't think you were going to. Let me know if you need anything!" She smiled and just as quickly he was gone. Feeling comforted by the fact that she at least knew someone, she sat back and people watched while waiting for the meeting to start.

About two minutes before 8pm, a blonde girl with light pink highlights came in dragging another girl. She was shorter than Brittany, with brown hair, brown eyes and tan skin. Brittany thought she must be Latina of some kind but had no idea what. What she did know was that she was stunningly beautiful. She felt herself being momentarily upset by the fact that she seemed to be very close with the blond girl, probably girlfriends. She internally scolded herself because she wasn't here for that. She didn't even want to be in a relationship, maybe never again, how do you trust someone with so much of yourself? But that girl was so so pretty. The girl caught her eye and smiled this sort of crooked smile at her and Brittany couldn't help but look away and blush. But not before smiling back.

Once the meeting started she tried to keep her focus on the four people talking at the front of the room. Occasionally her focus would drift to the brunette and occasionally the brunette would be glancing at her. When this happened her heart would speed up and she could feel herself blushing slightly, much to her own dismay. She really really didn't want anything beyond friendship with anyone. But maybe they could be friends? She did try to pay attention to the meeting though. Most of it was information about what they do as an organization, what kind of events they hold, how they take informal trips to the nearest gay bar for dancing, that kind of thing. Finally they decided they'd do introductions.

"I'll start. I'm Kurt, very gay, very single." Everyone laughed a little bit. "And like I've told most of you, I'm the secretary. Also I'm in the Musical Theater program. Oh! And you don't have to tell us your sexuality or anything like that. Whatever you're comfortable sharing!" Brittany smiled at him. He seemed so nice, and he had wonderful skin she noticed. People started introducing themselves and Brittany was excited to get to the Latina and know her name. Which made her blush a little again. She felt so silly getting excited to know someone's name.

A boy who'd not really spoke to anyone introduced himself "Hi I'm Blaine, I'm gay. I'm also a first year in the Musical Theatre program. And I'm single and trying not to be nervous." People chuckled. She briefly wondered if Blaine and Kurt knew her roommate Rachel.

Next a fabulous looking black girl introduced herself. "I'm Mercedes! Hey everybody! I'm straight. I'm a sophomore Music major And this fine specimen next to me is my man. So back of boys and girls." The Latina high fived her over top of a blonde boys head. So they were friends too. She must not be a freshman.

"I'm Sam, and I'm hers." He nudges Mercedes and Brittany decides they might be the cutest couple ever. "I'm a sophomore in the film program aaaaand always available if anybody needs to talk or anything." Brittany thought that he seemed really genuine. She hoped she could make friends with these people.

"I'm Santana. Music. Sophmore. I know most of you. Single. And oh yeah…lesbian." First thing Brittany noticed was that Santana liked to pretend she didn't want to be here. Next thing she noticed was her excitement over the fact that Santana (which might be the most beautiful name she's ever heard) is a lesbian and single. The final thing she noticed was the way she said lesbian, forcefully, as if trying to prove it, and directly towards another brunette girl who rolled her eyes. Brittany didn't really understand what was going on but she was sure whatever it was had been going on for a while.

"Hi I'm Quinn. Sophomore English major. I don't like labels. And I'm here because I had to drag my roommate in. Something about being "done with all you queens."" And she nudged Santana in the ribs. Brittany decided that she might like this girl too. She didn't like labels either. Only, it was more that she didn't really understand them. Truth be told, she didn't understand a lot.

People kept introducing themselves. There was a mixture of freshman, sophomores, juniors and seniors. Although she noticed there was more sophomores and juniors than anything else. When they came upon the girl that had rolled her eyes at Santana, her introduction further solidified that Brittany might not like her.

"I'm Anna. Junior Fashion Design major. Actual lesbian so… you know. No penis. Annnnnd… I'm single. For now." A couple people chuckled. But mostly everyone just kind of looked at the next person waiting for their introduction. Brittany looked at Santana, and by association Quinn. Santana crossed her arms and shook her head back and forth and an angry chuckle fell from her lips. Quinn just glared at this Anna girl. And Brittany was sure now that she wasn't going to like her.

A few more people introduced themselves and Brittany found herself nervous to introduce herself to everyone. Talking in front of lots of people was never a strong suit of hers. It was just one more thing on a list of things that made her pretty nervous, and when she got nervous, she didn't always say the right things. Her turn was up. "H-Hi. I'm Brittany. Um… a freshman. Dancer. (she hears Mercedes say something like Yeah she is girl look at those legs! And blushes) I am…bisexual? I guess. I don't like labels. I just like people. And ducks." And that's when she cut herself off because now is when she starts with the anxiety driven lack of control of what comes out of her mouth. People laugh and then they move on with their introductions. She chances a look at Santana who is looking at her and smiling. Such a pretty smile. Brittany smiles back and then refocuses herself on the rest of the introductions because she's pretty sure she's coming back and would like to remember some names that aren't just Santana. After the introductions were over, Kurt announced that a bunch of them were probably going to meet up at a late night coffee shop after the meeting if anyone was interested. Brittany wondered if Rachel was still singing in their room. She really only had until eleven when quiet hours kicked in so maybe Brittany would go. She wondered who else might be going.

She stands up and brushers her shirt down and looks down to see where she'd put her bag and when she looks back up, much to her surprise, Santana is standing right in front of her. "Hey, you're new. Obviously. You said you were a freshman. Duh. So are you uh… going to the coffee shop? I'm Santana by the way in case you forgot… or whatever. Yeah." Santana awkwardly sticks out her hand like she just wasn't sure where else to take that introduction. But Brittany takes it gladly. Santana's hands are warm, and soft and she imagines that it might be wonderful to hold them. If she wanted that. Which she definitely does not. At least… yeah no. She really doesn't want to want that.

"Yeah, I think so. My roommate kind of kicked me out of the room so I don't really have anywhere else to go. Except the library I guess but I don't really want to go back there."

"You're roommate kicked you out? That's a bitch move."

"It's ok. She needs to sing for an audition tomorrow so it's fine. I don't mind. I don't think I would have come here if she hadn't kicked me out."

"Then I'm glad she kicked you out too." Santana smiled at her. And then made a face when she realized how lame that probably sounded so she tried to amend it. "Caus you know, we need more members. And…support." Brittany just smiled. And even despite her obvious hang ups, she kind of liked that Santana was flirting. Or at least she hoped she was flirting.

"Mhmm." Brittany sucked her bottom lip into her mouth.

"So you're roommate is a music major? I wonder if I've seen her." Brittany shakes her head.

"No not exactly. She's musical theater. She's apparently destined for Broadway. She does have a good voice she's just kind of annoying." Santana laughed.

"Yeah I know most of those kids too. I've done some rehearsal piano work for them. They're less stuck up than the people in the music school. So you dance? What kind?"

"Any. All of them. I love everything. Hip Hop might be my favorite, followed really closely by modern and jazz. I also love swing dancing but mostly just for fun. Ballet is awesome too. Everything." Brittany knows she can ramble when she talks about dance. It's just that she's never loved anything like she loves dance. As soon as she starts talking about it she notices that peoples eyes glaze over. The I'm listening but not listening look. She's used to it. But Santana doesn't do that. She looks at Brittany enthusiastically, almost encouraging her to keep talking but Brittany doesn't. It's a slippery slope.

"I've always wanted to swing dance actually! That's amazing. Dancing is amazing. Dancing and music together, the most amazing." Brittany is glad Santana thinks that, because she thinks so too. The rest of the group starts walking out to go towards the coffee shop and Brittany notices that Mercedes is walking towards them but Sam distracts her, and throws Brittany a little wave.

"What do you do in the music department?" Brittany asks because she's interested. She wouldn't ask if she wasn't. She's not very big on small talk and she thinks that maybe people think she's weird for it. Pointless social graces have never been something she's good at, much to the dismay of her mother.

"I play piano and sing. Mostly piano though. I've been playing my whole life. Like…since I was three. And these clowns here don't have much to teach me. Which is fine. It means I can get out of here easy and in their good graces. They don't exactly love my singing so I probably couldn't get out of here with a degree in that although it is my minor. I just, I really love to sing. Like really really love it." Santana once again seemed to feel like she'd said to much and cut herself off. Brittany wished she wouldn't. She can only imagine how beautiful her singing voice must be if her talking voice is this mesmerizing.

They got to the coffee shop and both put in their orders, still making idle small chat about the group, and the town. After they'd got their orders Santana asked her if she'd take hers to the table with her she needed to run to the bathroom. She took Santana's drink (black coffee) and was looking around for a table when Mercedes waved her over to a table with Quinn and Sam. She smiled and headed that direction, looking towards were Santana was heading. She watched that Anna girl walk out of the bathroom just as Santana was about to walk in, Anna must have said something to her because Santana looked kind of angry and Anna looked kind of bitchy. She idly wondered what was going on with that situation.

Brittany sat down cautiously at the table. She forgot how hard meeting new people was. But thankfully this particular group of people seemed determined to make it easy on her. "Hey Brittany. Where did Santana go?" Quinn asked her smiling gently. It made her oddly happy inside that someone was asking her something about Santana, although she couldn't quite figure out why.

"She went to the bathroom. Thanks for letting me sit with you guys." Mercedes beamed at her, and looked a little like she wanted to say something but didn't know if she should. Brittany knew that feeling.

"So…how's your first couple of days going? Making friends? Like you and Santana seem to be talking a lot…" Mercedes started.

"Mercedes mind your business." Quinn interrupted her. And smiled and Brittany.

"It's just that Santana doesn't talk to people so easily, at least not nicely. But she straight up gravitated to blondie here and I was just curious." Well now so was Brittany.

"Yeah well you better shut your mouth lest she 'go all Lima Heights' on you." Quinn responded.

"Did you seriously just say 'lest she go all Lime Heights'?" Mercedes started cracking up. Brittany started laughing as well. "Girl get your head out of those damn books for a minute please." Quinn shook her head but laughed non the less. Brittany looked up and Santana walked over, ignoring the seat next to Quinn and immediately sat next to Brittany. Brittany smiled. So did Quinn.

For the rest of the time they discussed small things. They all gave Brittany unsolicited (but still appreciated) advice about the town, and the dorms. She found out that they all live in an apartment complex right off of campus. Mercedes lives with Kurt and Santana lives with Quinn. "Why don't you guys live in the dorms?"

They all got a little bit quiet just long enough for Brittany to pick up that there was something more to that question than they wanted to talk about. She wasn't particularly bright, but she was pretty intuitive. "Girl would you live there longer than you have to?" Mercedes covered, but Brittany could still feel the tension. After the coffee was done and both Quinn and Mercedes had decided they needed to get going so they could finish homework, they all got up to leave.

"Which dorm do you live in? Do you want us to walk you back?" Brittany told them that she lived in Webster and that she'd be ok to walk by herself. "No it's ok that's pretty much on the way we can just walk with you so you know… no one kidnaps you or whatever." Quinn rolls her eyes but they all agree. As they're walking back they are discussing a party that's going on in one of the members houses next Friday and Santana insists Brittany has to come. She's not sure how she feels about that. She remembers parties Tommy forced her to go to in high school. She's about to tell them she's not sure if she wants to do that but she looks at Santana, who looks hopeful so she tells them she'll think about it.

"It depends on how much homework I have and how hard classes are getting by then. But maybe." Santana smiles at her. And soon they're at her dorm.

"Maybe I could give you my phone number in case you need anything or you get lost or like want to go to the party or have coffee or just whatever." Brittany gets her phone out and smiles at Santana who promptly gives her her number. Brittany gets her keys out and thanks them for walking her home and goes into the building. She thinks it's a good sign that nobody is talking about the crazy girl who won't stop singing in one of the rooms. She doesn't, however, notice that just outside Santana is getting mercilessly teased for her epically unsuave behavior. She probably would have smiled though. She gets up to her dorm room and thinks that even though she probably shouldn't reciprocate Santana's flirting because she's still trying really hard to not want that, she thinks texting Santana so she has her number too can't hurt.

To Santana: It's Brittany. Here's my number in case you need anything or want coffee or whatever. ;)

She gets to her room and notes that it's silent. Trying hard not to wake Rachel because she's already gotten that lecture on routine and regiment and good nights rests and she doesn't want it again, she enters the room quietly. She throws her phone on her bed and changes into pajamas. She thinks maybe she should do more homework but she's kind of tired and doesn't have a class super early so she can do it then. She notices her phone light up just as she gets into bed.

From Santana: thanks britt. Maybe we could hang out this weekend. I could show you some stuff we told you about today at the coffee shop.

Brittany smiles and tries to contain her excitement but at night, in the dark, she's having a hard time caring.

To Santana: I think that would be awesome. I'll let you know after class tomorrow ok?

From Santana: Ok. I'm glad you came to the meeting. Goodnight.

Brittany is glad she doesn't claim it's for support reasons this time. And is also glad she came to the meeting.

To Santana: Me too. See you soon? Goodnight.

She plugs her phone into her charger and sets her alarm although she's pretty certain, as similar to the rest of the days this week, Rachel will wake her earlier than she intended on waking. And she curls up in her blankets thinking about the day, and dance, and really mostly Santana.


	2. Chapter 2

**AN: **Here you go. Next chapter. I'm really excited about the response from the first chapter. So keep responding and I will keep writing. I hope you enjoy this chapter as well. And please remember if you have any suggestions I am open to them. I do have a plan but it's not concrete. Or even, I guess a better question is are there things you don't want to see?

Thanks for your future feedback!

K

* * *

At 5:00am Brittany has never been more angry to be right. Because Rachel is up and going through her morning routine, whether or not the sun is even up is a little bit hazy. Which Brittany thinks there's a problem right there… you should never be awake so early that you can't tell if the sun is out. It should just be out, you should be sure. But since she's up she might as well be up for real. She decides she'll shower after dance class and that she should probably do the last bit of homework she didn't get to yesterday.

It's a struggle. It is always struggle, it has always been a struggle, and it will always be a struggle. It's a terrible combination of having a hard time understanding the way they phrase things, and not being able to stay focused long enough to make any real progress. She reads a sentence and a half, and suddenly remembers she needs to put her water in the fridge or it won't be cold for when she gets back from dance. Two more sentences and suddenly it's really important that she know whether or not her favorite jeans are clean so she can wear them. Another sentence and she is trying to remember if she's talked to anyone in her family since she's moved into school. It's not that she doesn't want to focus, she desperately does to a point of near tears. She remembers when she was little, her teachers told her parents that she thought Brittany might have learning disabilities, and her parents said that was impossible. She just needed to try harder. After twelve years of trying as hard as she can, she thinks her teacher was probably right.

Dance isn't a struggle, and that's one of the things she loves about it. But her parents caught on pretty quick to that and would use it as leverage. If she didn't try hard enough and do well, she wouldn't get to go to dance class. And she'd lie in bed at night and cry because her favorite thing had been taken away from her, and not because she didn't try, it was because she just wasn't good enough. That had to be the answer because she was trying as hard as she could. This form of punishment had gone on till the day she graduated high school. She began to think it was because she was stupid. That was the only option.

Her parents took other things away too. Not cheerleading, because they loved the very public nature of that hobby. She thinks her parents were playing that popularity game with their friends too, and some how her uniform got them points. Which was frustrating, because she didn't want it in the first place. They took away her ability to go out on weekends. She didn't mind that. She pretended to because then they'd take that away and let her go to dance sometimes. The first time Tommy called and she wasn't allowed out because of grades, she was glad to have a good excuse to stay in, but he was terrible about it. "God Brit why are you so fucking retarded?" He said angrily. She didn't have an answer, she didn't know why.

But now she was in school, and the consequences felt bigger but oddly similar. The only reason she was allowed to go to school for dance (her parents deemed it impractical) was because she paid for it almost completely by herself with scholarships. Her parents paid for housing, which she appreciated. But in order to keep dancing, she needed to keep her scholarship, which meant she had to do well enough in school. If she lost the scholarship, she had to switch to get a degree in business in order for her parents to continue paying for school. She thinks she'd rather drop out and just move to New York City and try to be a dancer professionally instead of getting a business degree. So grades are important.

She finishes what she's going to be able to of her homework and gets dressed for class. Jeans and a t-shirt for now, dance clothes in her bag. She leaves her dorm and gets to the classroom a few minutes early. She looks over the first few pages of the chapter hoping that knowing what's coming might make it easier for her to follow along in class.

Unfortunately she's wrong. It didn't help. And as soon as she leaves the classroom she calls the office for tutoring and schedules a tutoring session for that afternoon a little bit after dance class. So much for going to the gym today. Dance class goes really well. Still nothing very difficult, but not having to push herself feels good right now because her brain feels full. She looks for her phone after dance class to check the time, not expecting to see anything else. She doesn't really have friendships that followed her here, she was pretty eager to leave all of that behind her. But she does have a text. It's from Santana! She beams as she clicks the open message button.

From Santana: Hey Brit, how are classes so far today?

She frowns a bit. That's a loaded question and she's not sure she wants Santana to know how hard she's struggling already.

To Santana: Just got out of dance class which was great. Going to shower and then a meeting and then to the Library. How's your day going?

Tutoring is technically a meeting, so she's not lying. She makes her way back to the dorm.

From Santana: Boring as shit. History classes are so easy, and I'm taking Spanish classes which are a joke because I've been speaking Spanish my whole life. It's all a breeze. What are you up to now?

Brittany wishes classes were a breeze for her. She wishes that her homework didn't make her feel like her head was exploding, and she wishes the fear of not doing well enough didn't make her stomach sick.

To Santana: Showering then meeting then Library for tons of homework.

That's not lying. Tutoring is technically a meeting. A meeting for stupid people.

From Santana: That's a terrible Friday night. I'm sorry.

To Santana: It's ok, it's not like I had any other plans. Well, getting in shower and stuff. I'll text you after my meeting, it's ok if you're too busy to talk.

She hopes Santana won't be. She likes talking to her, even if it is just texting. And she reckons that she'll probably need a little bit of cheering up after tutoring.

From Santana: I won't be. Talk to you soon. Good luck with showering. And your meeting. : )

Brittany smiles. She wishes she could spend her Friday night with Santana but thinks it might be to early in their friendship to ask. But just being around Santana makes her feel warmer in a good way. And it certainly would be better than doing homework. But she has to do homework, so it might be better that she isn't brave enough to ask Santana to hang out. As friends, like a friend date. Where they flirt. Whatever.

After her shower she puts on a summer dress and sandals. Soon it won't be warm enough to wear it so she should make sure she does now. She walks to the Library where her tutoring appointment will take place. When she gets to their designated room she's greeted by a very stern looking boy who looks a few years older than her. They talk about the class he's tutoring her in, and asks what she needs help with. She tells him everything and he sighs frustrated with her. This isn't a great start.

By the end of the meeting, she thinks there are a few things she might understand better but mostly she's really frustrated with herself, and kind of frustrated with the tutor. She doesn't think tutors are supposed to treat you like you're stupid. They're supposed to help you, and she was trying really hard, but he sighed a lot, and left the second their time was up. She finds herself a table to set up at and lays all her stuff out. But first she needs a few minutes of distraction so she texts Santana.

To Santana: How's it going? Any fun plans yet?

She waits a few minutes but receives no reply. She frowns but decides that's a good a sign as any that she needs to start working. So she does. She gets so frustrated several times that she goes to the bathroom even though she doesn't need to. Just for an excuse to walk away. An hour and a half in she feels her phone vibrate.

From Santana: I'm so sorry! I went to get dinner with 'Cedes and forgot my phone. Done with homework?

To Santana: It's ok. If you're busy I can talk to you later. And no, I think I might be here forever.

She frowns back down at her paper and pushes herself to read a few more sentences. Even after her phone goes off she wills herself to read three more before she can answer.

From Santana: I'm not busy at all! And I'm sorry. At least the Library isn't the worst place ever to be.

Brittany guesses she's right. She could be home. She could be being forced to hang out with Tommy, or spend alone time with Tommy, and that would definitely be worse.

To Santana: You're right. I just wish the water fountain worked, I'm super thirsty but I've got at least a few more hours here.

To Brittany: That sucks. I'm sorry Brit.

Brittany likes that Santana calls her Britt. She smiles and sets her phone down, determined to finish this chapter and the questions before she leaves. She's the only person left in the area in the Library. It is Friday after all, most people have better places to be.

About half an hour later she's so frustrated with herself that she puts her forehead to the desk and is trying to count to ten to refocus herself or something when she hears someone clear their throat. She looks up and to her surprise and excitement she sees a bashful looking Santana standing there. Brittany isn't sure she's ever smiled this big before. But she's happy to see Santana, and the small bashful smile that evolves into a beaming smile makes her look so beautiful. And she doesn't even care that she thinks it.

"San! What are you doing here?"

"You saiddd that you were thirsty. So I brought you some water. And then I thought that I can't just bring you water because that's not a very exciting gift so I also brought you a cupcake." Santana smiles widely for a moment, and then her face shifts. "This was lame"

"I love it!" Brittany says before Santana can negate her actions any more. Brittany is positive nobody has ever done something this nice for her before. All she said was that she was thirsty. She could have bought her own water, or ran back to her dorm room and go a bottle, or not been stupid in the first place and brought one. But Santana brought her one. "This is the nicest thing anyone has ever done for me." Brittany says seriously before she can stop herself. Santana scoffs.

"Yeah right." She laughs again. "But here you go. What are you working on?" She sits down next to Brittany. The blonde takes a few drinks of the water before she answers.

"American National Government."

"Oh I took that! It's super easy." Brittany hangs her head a bit and lets her hair cover her face. She was just about to make a remark about how hard it was. She's glad she didn't. She didn't want Santana to know how stupid she was. She was sure she wouldn't want to be her friend or anything else for that matter if she knew. "What's wrong Brit?" Santana nudged her with her shoulder. "Seriously Brittany what's wrong?" Brittany looks up to see honest confusion on Santana's face and decides she'd rather be honest now then get to attached to this lovely girl and then lose her. In whatever capacity.

"It's really hard for me. Everything is. I even had a tutoring session on this today and I'm still confused." She's not sure what she expects Santana's reaction to be. She doesn't think she'd call her stupid or make fun of her, she doesn't seem like that kind of person. Maybe she kind of expects her to play it off and leave and maybe not talk to Brittany anymore. What she doesn't expect, is to suddenly hear Santana's chair being pulled right next to her, or the way that having Santana so close makes her feel.

"Ok then. Let me see if I can help. Where are you stuck."? Brittany looks at her for a moment in disbelief. And thinks that maybe Santana is to good to be true. But she's looking at her expectantly and smiling like she knows she can help. So Brittany lets her try. She explains where she got lost, and what she thinks she knows but isn't entirely sure that it's correct. And settles in to let Santana try what so many other people have failed.

In less than an hour Santana manages to get Brittany caught up on her chapter, and to clear up any confusion caused by her tutor and her professor. She's got three diagrams drawn in various color highlighters, along with a silly cartoon that Santana drew to make her laugh. She thinks maybe Santana is magic.

"Nope. They were just teaching you wrong Britt Britt. No big deal. Can I walk you back to your dorm? It's on the way." So Brittany lets her. And not for the first time she needs to remind herself that she can't let herself get into a relationship again, she shouldn't even want to. That she still has so many bad feelings about the last one she was in that she doesn't think it'd be possible to start a new one without letting all those bad feelings in. "So do you have any plans for tomorrow?" The Latina asks her. Brittany nods her head to the negative.

"Nope" she says, popping the p. "You?"

"Not a one. I was wondering if maybe you'd like to go see the new scary movie that's out in theaters?" Brittany smiles and looks at her shoes. Yes she wants to go. Should she? Friends see movies. And even though she knows she shouldn't want Santana to ask her on a date, she kind of wished she had anyway.

"Definitely. As long as you don't mind me burying my head in your shoulder." Brittany laughs.

"I look forward to it." Santana responds smiling sweetly. They are standing in front of Brittany's dorm. "Well, I'll let you get inside. I will text you tomorrow about times and stuff?"

"Ok. Thank you again San, I don't know how I would have gotten my homework done without you."

"No problem Brittany. Any time. Seriously. Have a good night." She smiles and waves and Brittany watches her walk away wishing that she'd stay but knowing that she shouldn't wish that. So she lets Santana walk away, and she goes inside and notices that Rachel isn't there. She wonders if she's out with friends. She then wonders how Rachel managed to make friends. And then she feels bad for thinking that because honestly, Rachel isn't that bad. She's just a lot sometimes. She puts on shorts and a tank top in preparation for bed. She sets her alarm so she will get up and go to the gym and lays down in bed knowing that she's not particularly tired.

Her thoughts go almost immediately to Santana. She wonders, if she'd never dated Tommy, if she'd never lost faith in relationships, if she'd be just excited about her undeniable attraction to the woman. Partially it's fear because she knows that deep down, their relationship was never ok or normal or anything. And part of it is this heavy apathy that settled inside her many years ago that she doesn't know that one beautiful girl with a beautiful smile can make go away. She doesn't know exactly when things started to feel this way.

She suspects that it may have been the conversation she had with her mother about how she was truly unhappy with Tommy. He didn't treat her well, and he was pressuring her to sleep with him. She wanted to break up with him again. Her mother told her that sometimes woman did things they didn't want to to keep their men happy. And that a woman is only as good as the husband she manages to catch, and Tommy would make a good husband. And then told her she would make an appointment to get her on birth control as soon as possible.

Brittany walked away from that conversation filled with a lot of negative emotions. She was confused and angry because what? None of that made sense to her. Why would anyone do something they didn't want to? And why do people stay with someone that doesn't make them happy? Surely there was a better answer. She was also sad because clearly her mother had experience in this and even though Brittany didn't particularly like her mother, she loved her. But unfortunately, after so many years of being told she was stupid Brittany didn't exactly trust her own intelligence and common sense. She thought maybe she was wrong, maybe this was how things were. She also knew that her mother would be deeply disappointed with her if she broke up with Tommy. Maybe her mom would soon see how unhappy he made her and she'd agree that they should break up.

That obviously didn't happen since they didn't break up till much to late. Because now she's lying in bed with tears in her eyes wishing that she'd just broke up with him. Or never dated him. And that maybe she'd be a little more carefree, and maybe she would be brave enough to ask Santana on a date. And she wouldn't have to keep trying so hard to not want this.

She woke up the next morning with a slight headache. Nothing some water and time at the gym couldn't fix. She noted that Rachel was now asleep in her bed. She briefly wondered what time she got in. She dressed for the gym and brought her water, keys, and plugged her headphones into her iphone. She gets to the gym and heads straight to the elliptical, putting on her workout play list.

After forty-five minutes on the elliptical she decided she was bored with that and went over to the weight machines. She glanced around to figure out what she might do first, and saw Sam form the LGBTA meeting. He spotted her and waved her over.

"Hey Brittany. Nice to see someone I know here." He smiled at her. She could understand Mercedes attraction. He was attractive and so sweet.

"Hey Sam. Mind a workout buddy?" He laughs and shakes his head no. They take turns on machines, helping each other out by changing the weight or whatever necessary. Sam obviously lifting much more than Brittany, but it was still nice to not work out alone. "So can I ask you a personal question?" Sam nods, drinking some of his water. "Why are you in the LGBTA? Is it cause Mercedes is there supporting Santana or…?"

"Nope. I actually met Mercedes there. Which is kind of funny if you think about it. But no, I had a friend in high school. He was on the football team, and kind of a jerk but like a good guy deep down. And I kind of suspected he might be gay because he checked out way to many guys' butts, claiming he just wanted to know what brand of jeans they wore. But I never said anything cause I figured he'd come to me if he needed to talk, which would have been fine. I don't care who you like, you know? " Brittany nodded. "Well, one day during our senior year, a picture of him and some guy holding hands got out. Nobody knows who took it or who released it, but he definitely wasn't ready to come out. A bunch of guys made fun of him pretty hardcore, and I should have stepped in but I was scared. I didn't want to get picked on too. So one day, he tried to hang himself. His dad found him before he died, but it was really close. And all I could think about was that if I had just opened my big mouth, maybe he'd be ok. I never let anyone pick on him again if I could help it. And he got better, and now he's at school and dating a really great guy and I'm really happy for him. But I figured if I joined LGBTA I could sort of…maybe be like the muscle? Like if I knew someone was picking on a guy like Kurt, or someone like Santana, I could help stop it. Because I don't ever want anyone to feel that alone ever again." Brittany just nodded. She didn't really have words. She was glad she'd met Sam. She hoped they could become really good friends. Because he seemed like an amazing person and just…she wished she had met someone like him in high school too. Maybe he'd have stuck up for her against Tommy.

"You are a bit wonderful Sam. I really hope we can become good friends." Brittany voiced.

"Oh I have a feeling that will definitely be the case. From what I hear you're kind of wonderful yourself." He smiles at her.

"Huh?"

"Just what I hear from Santana, that's all. She seems to really think you're pretty awesome. She's usually really stand offish. Or… I guess she's really guarded. But not with you." Brittany thinks she may have been able to guess that Santana wasn't as nice to everyone as she was to her. She doesn't know exactly why that is, but she's glad. Maybe Santana feels bad for her, no friends and confused by base level classes. Or, who knows.

"I think she's amazing. We're seeing a movie tonight."

"I heard. Well Brittany, it was great working out with you. Maybe we could make this a regular thing? But I've got to go I promised Kurt I'd help him put together some new Ikea thingy he bought." Sam shrugs and they both laugh. Brittany walks out with him and they go their separate ways. She looks at her phone and notices a text from Santana.

From Santana: Still on for tonight?  
Please say yes.  
Also if you were an animal what animal would you be?

Brittany laughs. She's not sure if it was hanging out with Sam, or the endorphins from working out, but she's in such a good mood and it's so much harder to not let herself develop hopes about this turning into something more than friendship.

To Santana: Yes we're still on I wouldn't miss it for anything. Annnd….Probably a unicorn? Or I guess I've been told I look kind of like a cat. So either one of those. You?

From Santana: Probably a dinosaur.

Brittany starts laughing really hard.

From Santana: Just kidding. Um… I think a wolf. Probably.

To Santana: I think both options would be amazing. What time do you wan to meet? We are meeting right? I don't even know where we're going. I don't have a car. : (

From Santana: No problem B. I was planning on driving anyway. Pick you up at 6?

To Santana: Sounds good S. ; )

Brittany gets back to her dorm, Rachel is on her computer. She sits down on her bed with her homework and tries to work on some of it. She wonders if Santana would mind helping her with this too. She'd feel terrible asking. Santana probably has plenty of things to do herself. At about 3:00 Rachel asks Brittany if she wants to go to the dining hall with her for an early dinner. Brittany agrees and they talk about various things, including classes and interesting things they'd seen on campus that week. Brittany decides she really doesn't mind Rachel that much.

When she gets back to her dorm room she showers and gets ready to go to the movies with Santana. Without meaning to, Brittany realizes that she's definitely made herself look a little nicer than she would if this was just any friend. But she decides that's ok. And that maybe Santana isn't just any other friend. Maybe she's a good friend, or you know, whatever. She gets a call from Santana telling her that she's outside so Brittany heads down. When she gets to the car she notices Santana's tight jeans and off the shoulders top. Her hair is down straight with light makeup on. She looks so beautiful.

They get to the movie and Santana insists on paying, so Brittany insists on buying popcorn and drinks and candy (because you can't eat popcorn without candy, everyone knows that). They pick seats in the theater and the movie starts. Within less than fifteen minutes the popcorn and drinks lay abandoned on the ground while Brittany is clinging to Santana with her face buried mostly in her shoulder with just one eye peaking barely out. And that's how she spends the entire movie. She misses the way that Santana almost puts her arm around her, or the pleased smile that Santana has on her face every time Brittany cowers into her for protection from the zombies.

"That was so scary!" Brittany exclaims as they leave the theater. Santana laughs.

"How would you know Brit you watched about five total minutes of it."? Brittany lightly smacks her arm. They spend another hour or so wondering around outside and getting ice cream.

"You look beautiful tonight B. I just… I uh just wanted to tell you that." Santana says as she shuffles her feet back and forth.

"You do too Santana. I am having a great time tonight. I'm really glad I met you and that we're friends" Brittany knows the second she says the last part of that sentence that it wasn't the right thing to say. And she curses herself because she's always saying stupid things. Santana's face falls just for a half second but it's enough for Brittany to know that wasn't what she wanted to hear. And the worst part is that's not what Brittany even really wanted to say, she doesn't even know what she wants to say anymore.

Santana recovers quickly and the evening does not suffer for Brittany's slip. At least Brittany doesn't think it does. When it starts to get late Santana drops Brittany back off at her dorm promising to text her the next day. That night when lying in bed she decides her new course of action is to just not think about it at all. She's just going to let things be what they are, and not push the issue, but maybe not push the issue away either.

When she wakes up the next morning she heads to the dance studio to work on some stuff for her improv class before heading to the library to try and finish up her weekend homework. She spends a lot of the time trying not to get to distracted by texting with Santana but she kind of fails when Santana sends her funny questions and things that are so much more interesting than History or Government or Math could ever be. They do discover that they have a semi similar schedule and can eat lunch together a few times a week. Brittany is happy about this, and they decide to meet Monday.

Class Monday goes slowly but soon she gets to meet Santana for lunch. She laughs nearly the entire time and feels so much better about heading to math now that she's in a much better mood. On Wednesday's lunch date Santana brings up the party on Friday. Brittany really isn't sure about going to a party but Santana seems so excited and Brittany is pretty sure that she would never take her to a party like the kind she had had to go to in high school. So she agrees.

Thursday she goes to LGBTA and sits between Santana and Sam. She feels bad because she's only been able to meet him once this week to go to the gym but between classes, studio time, Santana time, and the insane amount of time she spends in the Library she just doesn't have the time. But he doesn't seem to mind to much. The meeting goes quickly and they don't introduce themselves again which Brittany is glad for. The Anna girl keeps her distance mostly other than a few sneers sent Santana's way, and a few curious glances at Brittany.

Friday after class Brittany spends a bit of time at the practice studio working on one of her dance classes before heading to her room to get ready. She checks her phone.

From Santana: I'm really excited you're coming with me tonight.  
Or I guess us. You're coming with us. But I am excited.

From Mercedes: Girl what color are you wearing?

From Sam: Mercedes really wants to know what color you're wearing.

From Kurt: Hey Brit! What color are you wearing tonight?

Brittany laughs at the texts. She is so happy with the friends she seems to be making.

To Santana: I am going with you silly. And your friends. But mostly you. I'm excited too.

To Mercedes: Probably black and red? I think.

To Sam: What color are you wearing Sam?

To Kurt: Black and red. Next time you better help me pick what to wear.

From Santana: : ) Meet you at your dorm to walk over?

To Santana: Of course. See you in a bit!

From Mercedes: Good. I didn't want us to clash.

From Sam: A pink spandex suit.

From Kurt: Good I didn't want us to clash. And next time for sure. : )

Brittany puts her phone down so she can focus on getting ready. She had decided earlier that day that she was going to wear her black dress. It was pretty short but so what? With these amazing red high heels. After her shower she did her hair and makeup and then got dressed. She only had a few minutes till Santana showed up. And everyone else. Right. She checked herself out in the mirror. Not bad she thought. She also hoped Santana would like it, she was pretty sure she would.

From Santana: We're out front, come down!

Brittany grabbed her bag and ran down stairs. As soon as she got out she saw Santana wearing a tight white dress with black heels. She looked absolutely stunning. Brittany knew her mouth was hanging open and so she shut it. But she couldn't stop staring. It seemed Santana was having a similar problem. Santana diverted her eyes first up to Brittany's face. "You look uh just shit. Beautiful Brit. You look stunning."

"You look so amazing San." She then remembered that there were several other people there with them " You all look good too. Lets go!" She tried to cover her awkwardness pretty unsuccessfully.

They got to the party, it was pretty loud but not intolerable. Brittany had already promised herself she'd only have one or two drinks no matter what anyone else told her to drink. She was pleasantly surprised that nobody seemed to have any desire to pressure her into drinking. Santana also wasn't drinking very much. Santana had recognized early on Brittany's hesitancy to go to the party at all, and didn't want to make things awkward for her now that she had come. Plus she didn't really like getting drunk anymore. They spent the majority of the first two hours at the party in a corner talking (read flirting) with each other when Santana realizes that she hasn't seen Kurt in a while. She goes to the kitchen to check on him.

When Santana walks away, Brittany sees Anna eyeing her up, and then walking over towards her.

"You look really hot." Anna says in what Brittany suspects was supposed to be a sexy voice except she failed.

"Uh thanks."

"I think you and I should maybe get out of here." She says, slurring a few of her words. She runs her finger down Brittany's arm.

"No I don't think so. I'm here with Santana and she's on her way back over so maybe you should go away." Santana walks back over as Brittany is telling Anna this. Anna squares her shoulders, not about to accept defeat. Brittany watches her sway a little bit. She must be really drunk, she thinks.

"I'm so much hotter." Brittany actually laughs at this. Santana beams at her. Anna started to look really angry.

"Yeah well you should probably know that bitch has a dick. Like a real fuckin dick. Isn't that right he she?" Brittany looks over at Santana expecting this to be some sort of mean joke or something, but Santana's eyes just get really wide, and filled with tears. She mumbles out a few words, and then runs from the house.

After about two very long silent seconds, Brittany bolts after her. She runs out of the house just in time to hear Mercedes laying a verbal smack down on Anna. Length of legs and lack of tears means she catches up to Santana pretty quickly. She grabs her arm which forces the Latina to spin and face her. Brittany's heart breaks at seeing Santana with large tears running down her face. The blonde pulls her into her arms tightly. Santana wraps her arms around Brittany's back and cries for a few minutes before her sobs start to calm down. She pulls away wiping under her eyes and mumbling apologies.

"Don't apologize San. You didn't do anything wrong. But…why are you so sad? Is what she said true? I mean…" Brittany trails off because she honestly doesn't know what it means, can girls have a penis? She suspects anything is possible.

"Uh yeah. I was born with one. And… But I'm a woman. My boobs are real, and I don't take hormones and I'm all girl Brittany except this one random part" Santana had decided honesty was the only way to go at this point, but then panics because she's sure Brittany is going to walk away.

"Shhhhh San. Sshhhhh It's ok. I swear it's ok. It doesn't matter. I know." Brittany says soothingly. Santana looks at her because there's no way anyone could be ok with this. But then she remembered, they're just friends. Her friends are fine with it.

"Yeah. It's ok because we're just friends. Right?" She doesn't mean for it to sound aggressive but it does. Brittany recognizes this as defensiveness. And she understands why. Something very personal and rare has just been revealed about Santana and on top of that Brittany knows she's been sending slightly mixed signals. But that's how she feels mixed. Then it hits her. She's not really mixed up. She knows exactly what she wants. And she knows what she doesn't want. She doesn't want the relationship she had. But that's not fair to put those standards on Santana. Santana would never treat her like that, and maybe she does want this. Nope. She definitely wants this.

So she puts her hands on Santana's cheek and brushes the tears away from under her eyes and then leans in slowly, as to give Santana plenty of time to pull away if this wasn't what she wanted, and then she kisses her. She presses her lips to Santana's fuller lips and she doesn't know how she's lived her whole life without this feeling. Butterflies erupt in her stomach as Santana starts to kiss her back, putting her hands on Brittany's waist. Brittany takes Santana's bottom lip in between hers and sucks gently, running the tip of her tongue across it. Santana lets out a breath into Brittany's mouth that held the slight vibrations of a very faint moan. After several minutes they pull apart. Brittany continues wiping tears off of Santana's face as Santana smiles beautifully up at her.

"I don't want to go back to the party." Santana says quietly. Brittany hates how small she sounds.

"Are you sure? I think Mercedes might have killed Anna." She tries to lighten the mood. It works a little, as Santana chuckles.

"You're probably right. But…I think maybe I'd just like to walk you home. If that's ok? If you want to go back to the party I understand."

"No San. The only reason I came was to see you. Plus, I'm kind of tired myself." Santana nods, and stands there awkwardly for a moment looking like she's having some sort of internal debate.

"Britt, could I maybe hold your hand? Would that be ok?" Brittany watches the blush creep up Santana's face. Brittany just linked their hands together as a form of response. They talk about nothing the entire way back. Sometimes asking each other random questions, sometimes just enjoying each other's company. When they get back to the dorm neither of them wants to be the one to say goodbye. But since it is Brittany's stop, she bites the bullet.

"Despite Anna's stupidity, I had a good time tonight. And you really do look so pretty San." Santana smiles at her in response. "Do you think I could see you tomorrow?"

"Definitely." She then leaned up and kissed Brittany sweetly for a few seconds before pulling away and giving her hand a squeeze. "You looked beautiful too. Goodnight Brit, I'll talk to you tomorrow."

"Text me when you get back so I know you're home. I don't like that you're walking alone."

"I'll be fine. I will text you as soon as I get back."

She kissed her one last time before kissing her gently on the cheek and then letting go of her hands and walking down the sidewalk. Brittany watched till she couldn't see her anymore and then went up to her room. She was glad Rachel was already asleep. She washed her face, brushed her teeth, and changed. When she got back to her bed she lay down and waited for the text from Santana. While lying there she couldn't help but think about what she'd heard. Brittany knew fundamentally she didn't care. She was adamant about gender not being what makes her like someone. But she was confused about the mechanics of it all. She just wasn't sure how she'd talk to Santana about it. She felt her phone go off.

From Santana: Back safe and sound. Also, I know you must be confused. And I'm sorry I wasn't ok to talk about it tonight, or that I didn't already tell you. But maybe tomorrow we could go to the park and we could talk about whatever. My…everything. We could just talk about anything. OK Brit?

Brittany was glad that Santana was presenting her with this opportunity to not have to awkwardly bring it up some other time. But she definitely wanted to reiterate that this wasn't something that was going to make her walk away.

To Santana: I'm glad you're safe. And I'm glad we'll get to talk but just know no matter what it doesn't change anything. You're the most beautiful girl I've ever met.

From Santana: You're amazing. Sweet dreams B. I will text you in the morning.

To Santana: You make it easy to be amazing. Sweet dreams to you too. Can't wait to see you again.

And Brittany found that the second she let her feelings just be what they wanted when she kissed Santana, some of that heavy weight eased just a bit in her stomach, and she fell asleep with dreams of beautiful brown eyes and the most beautiful smile ever.


	3. Chapter 3

**AN:** Longest chapter ever. I hope it doesn't feel like it's drawn out to you. I kind of like it.

**WARNINGS:** Trigger warning. There is some implied dubcon/noncon. It's not really explicit, and it's definitely not between Santana and Brittany.

Thank you everyone for your reviews they make me feel wonderful. I think I've replied to everyone. I hope you like this chapter and I hope you continue to review. Makes me want to write more.

Also, I started a tumblr. Link is in my profile, also my user name is the same username I have on here. Feel free to find me.

Enjoy.

* * *

Brittany wakes up a few times before she finally gets up. Every time she wakes up she checks her phone to make sure she doesn't have any texts from Santana. Even though the first time she woke up it was about 5:00am. Whatever, she's excited to see or hear from Santana again. Which she was happy that the thought of being excited to see Santana wasn't followed immediately by apprehension or any desire to negate that thought. She always assumed that she'd eventually get to a point where the idea of having feelings for a person didn't immediately fill her with dread but she didn't think that time was any time soon. But Santana is amazing, and Brittany isn't surprised.

She also isn't totally naïve. She knows that this thing with Santana is new and she doesn't know her very well. Old habits die hard, and she's not really sure how to act in a relationship or even in whatever this thing with Santana was. She's never been with anybody that she actually had feelings for. She thinks maybe that's why the relationship with Tommy didn't totally destroy her. Because by the end of the relationship, no matter what he did or said to her, she realized she didn't really love him anyway.

One day while out shopping with her mother, they stopped as they passed the window of a wedding boutique. Her mother told her that she couldn't wait to go wedding dress shopping with her and to plan the wedding. That Tommy would look good in a tux. Brittany told her mother that she didn't love Tommy. Her mother in a way that Brittany couldn't' tell if she was joking or not said that love has no place in a marriage. Brittany cried that night. And when she thinks back on the situation, she's not sure why she stayed with him. She had free will, she could have left. But she couldn't have at the same time. She had no confidence, her entire self-image was built around this idea that she was a dumb blonde cheerleader that wouldn't amount to anything except a good wife to a man that tolerated her because she was "the hottest bitch in this town." She couldn't have left. If she had when it started to get bad, she might have never found the strength to know she was better than all of that.

She just desperately hopes that she really is better than all of that, and only in moments where her deepest insecurities bubble to the surface does she really think that maybe she isn't.

Her text message tone breaks her out of depressing thoughts and she excitedly picks it up. She slides her finger across the screen and Santana's text message comes up.

From Santana: Sooo still up for park today? Could I maybe pick you up at noon? If later is better just let me know.

To Santana: Noon is great. I will see you soon!

She looks at the time, only an hour and a half to get ready. No problem. She gets up and shoves a cereal bar in her mouth since she has no idea if there are plans for lunch. She grabs her stuff for the shower and goes to the bathroom glad that not all of the showers are occupied. It is 10:30 on a Saturday morning. Maybe everyone else is still sleeping. She gets out of the shower and heads back to her bedroom.

After drying and straightening her hair in record time she gets dressed. Like fifteen times. She has no idea what to wear. When she's in some combination of a dress and jeans Rachel walks in.

"Hello Brittany. Nice to see you're up. I went to the practice room as to not wake you. I hope you slept well." Brittany wasn't sure if that comment was sarcastic and she was annoyed or if this was just Rachel. But Rachel didn't look annoyed or angry so she decided that it wasn't.

"Thanks Rach." She smiled at her. Rachel then looked at what used to be the closet exploded all over Brittany's bed.

"Not that it's any of my business Brittany but are you going on a date?" Brittany pauses. Is she? No. Santana didn't say it was a date, she just said they could go to the park and talk. She hopes they could go on a date, maybe she should ask? Who asks? Who pays? She snaps back to the current situation.

"No. No just park with uh a friend. Just a friend. I just don't know what to wear." Rachel is pretty sure she understands what that means. Just a friend, but Brittany wants to be more. So she decides to help. She likes Brittany after all. She's a good roommate, not the brightest girl ever but she's mostly considerate and nice.

"How about this?" She holds up a white sundress. Brittany cocks her head to the side. It is cute. But..

"Mmm grass stains. Plus it's hard to sit on the ground in dresses that short. My legs are long." Rachel laughs because anyone with eyes knows Brittany's legs are long.

"Um, yeah. So…this? Is it a shirt?" She holds up a strapless shirt.

Brittany goes to the closet and finds the shorts that go with the top.

"Yes! Perfect! Thanks so much Rach!" And Rachel thinks maybe she's managed to not annoy someone enough that they might actually be her friend. She smiles.

"No problem. Glad I could help." Brittany gets dressed right there in front of Rachel while Rachel quickly adverts her eyes. She's learned that Brittany isn't shy. Apparently most dancers aren't.

Brittany grabs a bag and throws two water bottles in just in case Santana gets thirsty too (even though she'd totally just share). She throws some gum, wallet, keys, and a bottle of bubbles. Just in case. It's quarter till noon when she's all ready so she decides to wait outside because she's excited and it's nice outside.

When she sees Santana pull up it takes everything in her to not just run to the car, jump in and hug Santana. She gets up slowly, walks at what she deems a normal persons pace to be, and she gets into the car.

When Santana saw Brittany walking towards her she swallows thickly. God that girl is beautiful. She thinks to herself. She looks down at her own choice of clothes and, though she thinks she'll never be as beautiful as Brittany, she hopes Brittany thinks she looks pretty too.

Brittany does. She thinks Santana looks absolutely amazing in her tight jeans (she's going to have to ask how she can wear pants that tight with showing anything) and a loose tank top and wedge sandals. "Hey Britt. You look really pretty. I like your top"

"You look beautiful. And thank you!" Brittany responded with a big smile. Santana looked nervous, and she felt bad. She knew this conversation might be a big deal for Santana but other than general curiosity she knows that whatever Santana says to her will have little to no bearing on the way the girl makes her feel just being in her presence. But she's not really sure how to communicate that to Santana.

Santana nervously wonders if everything is still as it was last night. Wondering if it was ok for her to hold Brittany's hand because it'd be nice to have something to ground and connect her right now. This isn't something she talks about in detail a lot. Her friends know, and Quinn knows everything because she's her best friend, but mostly she keeps her penis and the fact that it exists to herself.

Brittany looks down and notices that Santana's hand is lying suspiciously in the palm up position just slightly more than halfway between the two of them and Brittany is pretty sure what that means. So she threads their fingers together and senses some of the tension leak out of Santana. She's glad she could help. It makes her feel good that such a simple gesture could physically reduce the amount of tension in the brunette. She also thinks that their hands look good together, pale and tan. She likes the contrast. "I was going to bring stuff for a picnic but I don't know what kinds of food you like, so until I do, I thought maybe we could do late lunch early dinner after the park if you still want to be around me."

That was a slip. Santana didn't mean to say if you still want to be around me. She meant to say if you still have time to hang out or something less self-depreciating. But she's honestly scared Brittany is going to walk away. She's not sure why. The big news is out in the open, she does have a penis, but somehow she's worried the details are going to be what scare Brittany away. God she so desperately hopes it doesn't. Because while she's known the blonde for like two weeks and even the thought is slightly melodramatic, she doesn't think she can go without this hand in hers.

The uncertainty in her voice breaks Brittany's heart a little bit. Did she give her the impression that she had any intentions of leaving? Was she just that used to it? "We will definitely have to eat after the park. Maybe we can go to that Mediterranean place you were talking about?" She says excitedly and definitively. She hopes Santana gets that she's saying there's no way she's not going to want to go to dinner with her afterwards. She hopes Santana is reassured. Santana is. A little bit.

They get to the park and get out of the car. Brittany grabs Santana's hand again before Santana can even deliberate about it and they start walking to an unoccupied area with a view of the lake, and to Brittany's surprise and great pleasure, the ducks. Once they get to the spot, they sit down next to each other and Santana pulls Brittany's hand into her lap to play with her fingers.

"So might as well get this started. Do you have questions?" Brittany had tons of questions. She wanted to know what Santana's favorite flavor of Gatorade was, and if she went running, did she like to swim, favorite movie… but she knew that's not what Santana meant.

"So you said last night you were born with a penis…?" Santana knew where this question was going.

"Yep. I guess when I was born, they thought I was a boy. But after the initial all newborn babies look the exact same, my dad always thought I looked really feminine. I'm not really sure how a baby can look feminine but my dad was skeptical. Then when I started to understand the difference between girls and boys as a toddler, I'd tell my parents I was a girl. I felt like a girl. I've always felt like a girl. So my dad had some tests ran. He's a doctor. And they found out I was intersexed. I had a fully formed penis and testicles, but also what they thought were malformed ovaries and an abundance of estrogen.

So my parents took me to counseling, and they said that if I was telling them I was a girl, then that might be how my gender was going to manifest itself as I got older, and that until puberty hit we'd have to play it by ear. My parents had named be Santino, so the shift wasn't that hard. Santana. They switched me to a different kindergarten so I could start there as a girl and that was kind of it. I grew my hair out and was a girl. Nobody really knew what would happen when I hit puberty. I guess it went as best for me as it could have, I grew boobs, my hips filled out a little, and I looked more feminine. And that was that."

"Your parents sound great."

"I guess so. Part of me feels like they just went with the practical decision. My Mami said she always knew I was a girl. Even when she was only a few months pregnant. She just had a feeling. And they've both said a lot of times that they wished I would have been normal. Which hurts because most days I feel normal. There are definitely days that it's harder, and that I wish I was a normal girl.

When I told them I was gay my Dad told me that he guessed he shouldn't have expected anything else. Which, again, hurt. Because having a penis doesn't really affect my sexual preference. They've been kind of stand offish with me my entire life. Like they aren't really sure what to say to me. I have three older bothers though. And they're all amazing. My dad used to pressure me about having surgery to get my penis removed. I didn't want to. I don't hate it. And surgery scared me. Then one night he got drunk and called me a freak and said he wasn't sure why I didn't just do what I needed to do to be normal. My brother Antonio got really upset with him and threw him out of the house till he sobered up. He apologized for how he said it, but not what he said. It was kind of a great source of stress in my family sometimes. But now we pretty much just don't talk about it."

"I'm sorry San. That's… I'm glad you have great brothers. I'm an only child." She didn't know what else to say. That's a lot for a little kid to go through. Having their gender switched. Having to decide to have surgery or not that would alter their body forever. "I think you're brave."

"I'm not brave. I didn't ever have a choice in the matter really. It's just something I've always lived with. " Brittany's next question felt awkward. She wasn't even sure how to phrase it, it was just she was really curious.

"Does it uh…does it work? It's ok if it doesn't! or- I just…you don't have to answer that" Santana's face split into a huge smile as a giggle escaped her lips.

"Yeah it definitely does."

"Do you masturbate?" That flew out of her mouth before Brittany could stop it. She really does need to think before she talks sometimes. She doesn't regret it though. The look on Santana's face is priceless. She laughs a little.

"Wow. Uh. Yeah. Do you?" Now it's Brittany's turn to blush. Not because she does, that would be normal. But because she doesn't. Sex hasn't really been a particularly enjoyable thing to her. So there are things she'd rather do than have sex with herself. Like dance or read or…most things really.

"No. Not really." Santana's face displays a little of the shock she feels at hearing that answer. She thought for sure. "How do you hide it in those jeans? Because they look amazing on you but I certainly can't tell."

"Yeah. While I'm not exactly unhappy that I have it. I do try to hide it. People don't really take to kindly to the idea of a girl with a penis. I have these crazy compression shorts. They are super super tight kind of thick spandex. They even make my hips and butt slightly flatter. Which I guess I shouldn't complain about."

Brittany nods. She guesses she could have come to the conclusion of special underwear all on her own.

"Do you pee standing up?" They both giggle.

"When I'm at home or at a place where it's like a single bathroom. But if there are just stalls I just sit down. Because people would get suspicious." That makes sense to Brittany. She nods. She wonders if it's ok to ask the next question but Santana has been really open and she's not asking anything that she wouldn't answer herself.

"Are you a virgin?" Santana shifts uncomfortably. "You honestly don't have to answer. It doesn't matter, I was just curious."

"No it's ok. No I guess I'm not. When I was in high school I was a cheerleader. And the coach required me to tell everyone on the team about my "little friend" as she called it. Not because she wanted to be mean, I don't think, but because she didn't want anyone to give me shit for finding out, or cause any big problems. Telling them wasn't that terrible. For the most part they kind of just didn't want to talk about it. They'd say ok and walk away. Or sometimes they'd ask a few questions. The older girls treated me differently a little. Sometimes they'd make remarks but I was a good cheerleader so they never tried chasing me off the team. And they knew if I went, Quinn would too and they didn't think that coach would just let them run off two of her best new recruits. " Brittany was slightly surprised that Santana too had been a cheerleader. She thinks those special underwear must be amazing if they can hide any size penis in a cheerleading skirt.

"So there was this girl on the squad, Tessa, and I had a crush on her. Quinn would always warn me about her because honestly Tessa was a huge bitch. But I had that stupid little crush on her. The other girls caught wind of it eventually.

Then one night I guess a few of the older girls were having a sleepover and they dared Tessa to sleep with me. They wanted to know what it'd be like. Tessa was a senior and desperately wanted to be a co captain and this was her last year to do it, and turning down a dare from the current team captain certainly wasn't going to help her with that. So she accepted.

She started flirting with me, and one day asked me if I was ever going to ask her out on a date. This was the summer a few days before my junior year. Quinn was so against the idea of it, she got so mad at me when I did ask Tessa, who accepted. We went out to the movies and to a restaurant and then she asked me to come back to her house because her parents weren't home. I was so stupid, looking back it was really obvious she wasn't really into me. But I liked her and was stupid so I went. We went up to her room and started making out. She stripped me down and she got on top of me. I could tell she was into it, physically at least. But I had no idea what I was doing. She didn't even really take her clothes off. After she was done she said I should probably go. And to not tell anybody that she liked it. Which, she could have just told me it sucked and I would have believed her, I had no reference.

The next day the older cheerleaders all knew what had happened and teased me for getting played by Tessa, who kind of looked sorry but never said it. First kiss and virginity all in the same night. I was sad about it, but I'm over it now. " Brittany thinks that Santana seems to still be a little sad about it, which is ok. She's still sad about her first time too.

"What about you, are you a virgin?" Santana asks hesitantly like she's not sure if she can. But Brittany was pretty sure she was going to ask.

"No." Brittany wonders how much detail she should go into. But honesty is where they're at right now so she keeps going. "I've only had one boyfriend. His name is Tommy. We started dating my sophomore year and not long after had convinced me that everyone had sex now days. And that if we didn't, he'd break up with me. And I knew my parents would be mad at me, and my older sister who had set us up would be mad at me. They really liked Tommy. And I had even convinced myself that I liked Tommy. Plus I was young and stupid and Tommy didn't really take kindly to being told no.

So one night at a party he had made me go to, we went upstairs, he was drunk. I could tell he was already hard. He wasn't a virgin though. He'd had sex with a girl a few weeks before we started dating. He kind of just pulled his pants down, slipped a condom on and pushed me down on the bed. He pulled my pants down and pulled my shirt and bra up. But not even off. I guess he was in a hurry. Then he kind of just went at it. It hurt really badly, and I'm glad the condom was lubricated because it would have been a lot worse. He held my arms above my head and just went really hard and really fast. I cried.

He finished threw the condom off, pulled his pants up and went back downstairs. I think I left after that, I don't really remember." Brittany said all of this with as little emotion as she could. She didn't want Santana to think she was damaged goods (although she thought she might be), and she didn't want Santana to feel sorry for her. But the look on Santana's face said that she clearly did.

Santana looked at Brittany with a mixture of shock and horror. She thought that her first time was kind of terrible, but Santana is pretty sure what happened to Brittany was legally still rape. She didn't know what to say or what to think. She didn't understand how it had happened, or how sweet amazing Brittany could have been with someone like that. She wanted to know how long they were together, and what other terrible things this boy did to her. She wanted to know where he was so she could kill him.

"I- God Brit I am so sorry." Santana held her hand tightly. "I would have never ever…I mean I won't ever. If we progress to that point Brit I need to you to know that I'd wait till you were ready. I'd never ever force you to do something you don't want to do." Brittany felt tears come to her eyes. She refused to cry. She clutched Santana's hand tighter while squeezing her eyes shut.

It was good to tell someone who reacted like this because she knew that what he'd done wasn't ok. She should have said no and pushed him off, but he shouldn't have ever done it regardless. But when she told her mom she'd had sex, she just said good thing she was on birth control. When she said she didn't like it, her mother told her she'd probably learn to. When she'd told her sister that he was too rough, her sister told her some girls like it rough. When she'd told the other girls on the cheerleading squad that she thought were her friends, they were just jealous because she'd slept with Tommy. Rumors started soon after that that she was a slut.

"I don't know what I want San, but I do know that in this moment, I want to be near you." Santana wasn't sure if that was meant as a general statement but she took it literally. Because she needed a hug after hearing that story so she's positive Brittany needed one after telling her. She got on her knees and pulled Brittany to hers and hugged her tightly. She tried to surround Brittany with as much of herself as she could because she needed to protect Brittany right now. She knew there was nothing to protect her from, theoretically. But the urge was still there. So she held her tight.

And Brittany for her part had no idea how much she needed that hug. But she did. And she sunk into it like all she wanted was to be a part of Santana. It felt good to let out the story, it felt good to be in Santana's arms. It felt good to have put out there some small part of why she might be damaged and Santana seemed undeterred.

Brittany sniffed back the few tears that managed to escape, and Santana pulled back to wipe under the blondes eyes. Santana then leaned in and ever so gently kissed Brittany on the lips. Brittany smiled and sighed at the same time because that felt so good. Santana sat back down and Brittany laid down with her head on Santana's lap, looking up the brunette. For the next hour or so they talked about much more positive things.

"What do you wear to bed?" Brittany asked.

"My footie PJ's." Brittany laughed as Santana made a silly face at her. "Kidding. Tank top and boxers. You? Probably really long flowy night gowns with those stupid night caps huh?"

"Mhmm. Just like little house on the prairie." Santana snorted. "No same as you silly." Brittany laughed as she answered. Then she closed her eyes and smiled because Santana was playing with her hair and she was just so happy right now.

Santana's breath caught because Brittany looked so peaceful and beautiful and she was so happy that she'd helped bring that look on her face about She leaned down and kissed Brittany's smiling mouth lightly and her smile widened. She sat back up. "Favorite flavor popsicle?"

"Grape. Which is like everyone else's least favorite flavor so it works out for me. I bet yours is cherry." Santana smiled and nodded even though Brittany's eyes ere closed.

"Mhmm. How'd you know?"

"That's what flavor your chapstick is. So I just guessed." It sent a tingle down Santana's spine to know that Brittany could taste her chapstick on her. She leaned down and kissed Brittany a little harder this time. Then sat back up and licked her lips.

"Pineapple?"

"Yep! Good one. But I have so many flavors of chapstick. Like seriously a million. I don't think I have any grape though." They both giggled. Then Santana's stomach growled which made her blush slightly but laugh harder all the same. "Hungry San? We should go get dinner. If you still want to."

Santana smiled. She was pretty sure she'd do anything that involved still being around Brittany. But food was definitely a favorable option. "Mediterranean?" Santana asked to double check. Brittany nodded and then puckered her lips up once more. Santana leaned down to kiss her innocently. When she sat back up Brittany stood up with seriously alarming speed and managed to pull Santana up with her. Brittany laughed at the stunned look on the Latina's face and entwined their fingers and headed towards the car.

When they got to the restaurant and were seated Brittany admitted that she'd never really had Mediterranean food before. "Really?" Santana was shocked.

"Nope. Not any interesting food really. My town is kind of small and there's really just bad Mexican and Chinese. So I haven't had most kinds of food." Brittany hoped Santana wouldn't judge her. She didn't think Santana was that kind of person. But Santana was silent and kind of staring at her for a moment longer than Brittany could interpret, so she was just about to open her mouth and try to justify this again when Santana's face split into a huge grin.

"Oh man! This is going to be so fun! I have so much to show you. Have you ever had sushi? If you've only ever had bad Mexican then you've definitely never had good Puerto Rican food. I mean I'm not an excellent cook but I'm way better than bad Mexican. Uh if you want to! I didn't mean to assume you'd want to." Santana said very quickly, or huge smile vanishing as her eyes grew bigger at her assumption that Brittany would want to do all of these things with her.

"You can go ahead and assume from here on out I want to spend time with you and do things with you. If that changes, I'll let you know. Although I don't think it will because… I mean who wouldn't want to be around you you're kind of wonderful." Santana blushed and ducked her head bashfully. When she looked up she had a gentle smile. A beautiful beautiful smile. "Will you order for me?"

Santana's smile grew. She's always wanted to order for someone. To have someone trust her enough to order. It seems like such a silly idea, but it's just something that she's seen people do and has always wondered if she'd ever get to. "Well, what about since you've never had it, I just order a few things and that way you get to try a couple options. We'll just share."

"That sounds awesome." Santana opened the menu excitedly. This is the best date ever. Wait. Is this a date? She wondered. I'm ordering. I plan on paying. I hope it's a date.

"So not all of this stuff is Mediterranean. It's also North African and Middle Eastern so it's really all over the place." Brittany nodded. She noticed that she missed Santana's hand in hers, so she reached out, and Santana slid her right hand across to hold Brittany's.

"You're left handed?" Santana nodded. Brittany smiled. She loved that she got to learn these little things. Santana placed the order and soon the food came Brittany learned that she loved hummus and baba gannouj even though it didn't look very good, and dolmas might be her new favorite food. But that falafel is kind of boring. Santana swore it was better on a wrap. They had an excellent time. Brittany doesn't think she's ever laughed so hard while eating. Or maybe ever.

Brittany was digging through her bag to find her wallet, fully intending on paying because Santana had shown her such an amazing time and it was the least she could do. But the waitress came and before she even set the bill down Santana had given her her credit card. "Santana!"

Santana chuckled. And then looked a little nervous. "Well I was really hoping it was a date and since I brought you I paid." Brittany smiled gently at her. This wonderful feeling started to fill that place that anxiety existed before and it felt like luck mixed with something amazing.

"Then I'll pay on the next date."

"So…you're thinking we will have a next date?" Santana asks hopefully.

"As long as you accept, I think there will absolutely be a next date." Santana nods and reaches for Brittany's hand again. They left the restaurant feeling happy with themselves and each other.

"So any plans for tonight?" Santana asked casually. Brittany wished the answer was no. But if she didn't go to the library to get some of her homework done she would have to spend all day there tomorrow.

"I have to do homework. Unfortunately." Brittany pouted. Santana wondered if it would seem too desperate to offer to help. But she wanted to spend more time with Brittany so bad that she was willing to risk desperate.

"Would you mind if I went with you? I mean I have some homework too that I could do there. As well as…I just kind of want to keep hanging out with you." She finished lamely. Brittany smiled. She'd hoped Santana would ask. She didn't want to ask Santana to come with her to maybe help her some more like she did last time because she didn't want Santana to think she was stupid. But if she was already going to be there then…

"Not at all. Maybe you could help me with government like last time? I think I mostly get it but a little help might make things a little easier understood."

"Definitely. So lets stop at my apartment and I'll get my homework, and then we'll stop at yours and you can grab it and then to the library." She was glad Brittany asked her for help. One, she really liked that she could help her. And two, she didn't actually have very much homework.

"Would it ruin my chances with you if I put on sweat pants and flip flops? Is it to early for that?" Santana laughed because she was happy that Brittany thought they had chances together. She also laughed because she'd seen Brittany in sweats already when they ate lunch together after her dance classes. And she laughed because honestly, Brittany could wear a grocery bag and still look hot as hell.

"No. That's perfect. I will also change into sweat pants. Because while these jeans make my ass look bangin, they are tight." Santana jokes.

"They really do."

"What?"

"Make your ass look bangin." Santana blushes and starts to negate what Brittany said.

"I was just joking."

"Well I wasn't." Brittany said with finality. They got to Santana's apartment and went in. "I like it, it's nice!"

"Quinn did most of the decorating. I just brought the TV and DVDS." Brittany turned toward the entertainment center. That was a pretty impressive TV. "Be right back." She kissed Brittany on the cheek and ran into her room. She came out a minute later wearing black sweats, white V-neck, and flip-flops. Brittany noted that she was most definitely still wearing the compression shorts. It made her sad, for some reason that Santana had to wear them. But she didn't really know how to tell Santana that.

They got back into the car and drove to Brittany's dorm room. There wasn't any parking close by. "Just pull up, I'll just run up."

"I want to see your dorm room!" Santana whined half jokingly.

"And I promise you will. When there's parking." Santana pulled up and Brittany kissed her on the mouth. What she meant to be a peck turned into a light make out session. She pulled away, pecked Santana on the lips once more and jumped out. Santana watched her run up the steps outside and into the building. While she was looking forward to everything Brittany, she wasn't particularly looking forward to boners in these shorts. It was really uncomfortable. She had pretty good self-control, but it's Brittany. So she was expecting this situation wasn't in the to distant future.

Brittany came back down in grey cut off sweats and a tank top a few minutes later and they drove to the library. When they got there they set up all of their books. It was about five minutes of Santana pretending to do homework while watching Brittany struggle, hoping she'd just ask for help, before she just offered. Brittany gladly accepted. Their chairs got closer and closer together until their thighs were pressed tightly together and Brittany's food often brushed Santana's leg as she explained something to her. After they made it far beyond what Brittany had thought she'd get through for the night they decided it was enough.

"I'm sorry I require so much help." Brittany was really insecure about this topic, Santana could tell. Santana mostly just wondered what school system, and parents had failed at helping Brittany find a way that she could learn better. Although what she knew of her parents, she didn't particularly like.

"You don't require anything B. I want to help. I like helping you." She nudged her shoulder as they walked through the library doors.

"So… this might be totally lame. And please tell me if it is. But I really kind of don't want to end our wonderful day with studying. So do you want to maybe watch a movie or something? You can say no."

Santana smiled because she's pretty sure Brittany just read her mind. "My place or yours?"

"Well you do have that awesome TV" Brittany runs her hand up Santana's arm. Santana shivers. This girl.

"So mine then. Let's go. I'll take you back after the movie." Brittany nods her head. Truthfully, part of her wishes Santana would ask her to stay over. But most of her is glad that Santana is giving her the time that she said she would. That sleeping doesn't equal sex to everyone. It's just that, Tommy never came over unless he wanted sex. And while she knows now that she didn't really love him or probably even like him, at the time she kind of convinced herself she did. And she wished, again at the time, that he had pretended she was good for something more than just that.

They drove back to Santana's apartment and went inside. "Pick a movie, I'm going to get us something to drink. Water, milk, sprite, or OJ?" Brittany was momentarily thrown by the idea that she would get to pick the movie. She doesn't think she ever picked the movie when she watched it with someone else. Tommy would have never let her, and her sister was way to bossy. Her parents never really watched movies with her, and her friends just assumed she'd want to watch what they wanted to watch.

Santana was watching her expectantly. Oh yeah, drink. "Water please." She walked over to the shelf. Santana, it seemed, was a big fan of horror and action movies. But she had a little bit of everything. She pulled Texas Chainsaw Massacre off of the shelf and sat on the couch. When Santana came back in with her water and some orange juice for herself, she put the movie in and grabbed the remotes.

"Good choice." Santana says approvingly. She then has a decision to make. Where to sit on the couch. She desperately more than anything wants to cuddle with Brittany. But she was unsure what level of cuddling Brittany would find comfortable. She decides to be bold and sits with her back in the corner of the couch, hoping that Brittany will want to lie against her. But Brittany is just slightly bolder than Santana in getting what she wants, and grabs Santana's ankles and slides her down so she's kind of laying against the arm, and then crawls on top of her and tucks her head under Santana's chin.

Santana barely hesitates for a second to wrap her arms around Brittany. As soon as she does she feels Brittany nuzzle in further. Santana thinks she could probably explode from all of the happy she feels right now. She's seen this move a million times so while Brittany is paying rapt attention, Santana's thoughts wonder.

She thinks about their conversation this afternoon and how happy she is that Brittany seems so totally unphased by the idea that she has a penis. Intrigued, sure, who wouldn't be? But otherwise, totally unphased. And then she thought back to what Brittany had told her about losing her virginity, or really having it taken from her, and it makes Santana sick to her stomach all over again. She doesn't know Brittany very well, she knows that, but she knows enough to not understand how anyone could willingly and purposely hurt her. She knows that if she ever saw this guy, she would without hesitation rearrange his face.

Just then something must have happened in the movie because Brittany screamed and buried her face in Santana's neck giggling. "Protect me San!" she laughed unaware of Santana's current thought train. Santana tightened her arms and kissed the top of Brittany's head. She would protect her. She would do anything she could, she already knew that.

"Always B. I've got you." The seriousness with which she said that was not lost on Brittany, and she shivered slightly in Santana's arms. She placed a light kiss on her neck and turned back to the movie.

At one point during the movie, Quinn came home. She came into the living room expecting to see Santana's nose glued to her cell phone screen as it had been this past week since she's met Brittany. Instead she's met with the vision of Santana lying on the couch with Brittany on top of her completely tangled together watching some gross horror movie. Which by the way is the worst date movie ever. She'd have to explain that to Santana. But, she guesses, Santana must not be doing to bad on her own really.

Quinn doesn't want to be skeptical of Brittany. But she's skeptical of anyone who shows Santana any kind of attention. It hasn't usually turned out all to well in the past and looking at the way Santana is currently trailing her fingers up and down Brittany's back and kissing the top of her head every time Brittany tenses up, she's already pretty attached to the blonde. She decides she'll have to talk to Brittany sometime soon. Just to make sure. She wants to be happy for Santana, but she wants to protect her first.

"Hey San. Hey Brittany" She walks into the living room. Santana smiles at her like 'look what I've got' or 'look how amazing this is!' and Quinn smiles back. Because if this turns out that Brittany is for real, she knows Santana deserves this so much. Brittany lifts her head and waves hello before nestling her head back under Santana's chin. Quinn goes to her bedroom to give them some peace. Interrogation another day.

After the movie ends, they just lay there for a few minutes. Brittany nuzzling her nose up and down Santana's jaw line before laying light kisses there instead. Santana sighs because it feels so amazing. Simple affection. Brittany then lifts her head and presses her lips to Santana's. Santana gently runs her tongue along Brittany's bottom lip, hoping she'd open for her. She does and Santana gently massages Brittany's tongue with her own.

Brittany moans quietly. This is the most amazing thing she's ever felt. Not to messy, or fast, or controlling. She pushes her tongue lightly against Santana's and they dance together for moments until Santana sucks lightly on the tip of hers. The sensation rocks Brittany a little more than she was expecting and she gasps. Santana slows things down a little and they trade perfect lazy kisses for a little bit until things start to get heated again. Brittany starts to feel what she assumes are the beginnings of arousal and gets scared and gently pulls away. She hangs her head a bit expecting Santana to get mad at her for pulling away or leading her on.

But of course she doesn't. She just brushes the curtain of hair away from Brittany's face and kisses her lightly on the nose. Brittany smiles and lays her head back onto Santana's chest. Santana's arms automatically surround her.

"You might be perfect." She says quietly. She's not sure Santana even heard her until she hears

"I'm not. But I'll do my best to be perfect for you." Coming from anyone else it might have sounded cheesy but the sincerity with which Santana said it felt like it healed something in Brittany that she didn't even know was broken. Santana tightened her hold on Brittany. Brittany lifted Santana's shirt lightly to touch the skin there. She saw the top of her compression shorts. She didn't like them even more when she saw how far they dug into Santana's side, and the angry red mark that it was leaving.

"Santana you don't need to wear those." She ran her finger along the painful looking mark. "I mean I get why you do in public, and that's your decision. But when it's just you and me hanging out or whatever, you really shouldn't feel like you need to wear them if they are uncomfortable. They look uncomfortable."

"I just didn't want to make you uncomfortable. I usually take them off as soon as I get home."

"Oh Santana. I promise you, no matter what anyone has ever told you in the past, that I honestly don't think any different of you than if you had a vagina, or if you were a boy, or if you were a boy with a vagina. I just…those things don't matter to me. Its just part of you, and I really like you." Santana really liked Brittany too. And hearing that made her heart swell a bit. She really didn't care. Santana could just be her and it didn't have to be about the fact that she was a girl with a penis, and that meant more to her than anything.

"You're amazing." She smiled. Brittany tried to say something, but yawned instead. "And tired. Let me take you home babe." Brittany smiled when Santana called her babe. She didn't want to go, but staying made her nervous. Plus Santana didn't invite her to stay. She was really tired though so she nodded. They got up and got into the car. As they drove the short drive back to Brittany's dorm something occurred to Brittany.

"Your apartment is not on the way from the LGBTA meetings! It's the opposite direction!" Santana laughed.

"You're right. I just really really wanted to walk you back that night. Plus I had friends with me and it wasn't that much longer, and it was better than you walking by yourself." Brittany can't really complain. She wanted to spend more time with Santana too. And the idea that she was already, even the first day they met, trying to protect her made her smile.

When they got back to Brittany's dorm they shared another amazing goodnight kiss. One that made Brittany tingle with anticipation of seeing Santana again before she even finished saying goodbye. After she got out of the car and made it up to her dorm room, she dropped her stuff and lay on her bed. Not even bothering to change. Her eyes were just drooping when she got a text.

From Santana: Goodnight B. I had an amazing time today. Sweet dreams. Goodnight. I will talk to you tomorrow.

To Santana: Goodnight San. I had an amazing time as well, sweet dreams. And you better.

Brittany drifted off to sleep with thoughts of Santana into what she's pretty positive were the best dreams she's ever had.


	4. Chapter 4

**AN:** So I got through half of the outline for this chapter and thought that it was getting really long. So I'm splitting this chapter. I've already started the next one. Sunday night at the latest I will have it posted.

Thank you for all of your reviews and suggestions. I keep trying to take them into account and work them in. So please by all means, keep suggesting. Or commenting. Telling me things you don't want to see is really helpful too. Anyway, hope you like the update. Please review!

* * *

Brittany is happy. She can say that with a certainty that she doesn't know she's ever been able to, other than at isolated times like dance and acceptance into college. Events. But this is a general happiness. A heart filling, lifting happiness that settles over her every time she thinks of Santana. Of course life isn't ever perfect, but things with Santana seem to be so far. She's been nothing but amazing and supportive. They met Sunday at a coffee shop to do homework. Yesterday Brittany didn't get to see her other than lunch, but even then Santana was never not holding her hand. She never came or went without kissing her. Gently. Never possessively (not that Brittany thinks it'd be a terrible thing for Santana to be possessive of her).

More than happy, Brittany has found a new feeling. Something she'd never felt. Not with dance or anything. Comfort. Santana has this way of making her feel comfortable and excited at the same time. Brittany, who her whole life has kind of wished she could be someone else, has begun to think maybe Brittany S. Pierce isn't so bad. Maybe she's worth it.

The only thing that could possibly bring Brittany down right now is the ever-present schoolwork. When she's doing schoolwork with Santana it seems to go better. Santana does her best to help her understand things. She doesn't talk down to her or make her feel stupid. She's never not felt stupid, but it's nice of Santana to not make it worse. Tutoring is helping a little, but its even more time out of her day. Last night she didn't even go to bed until four in the morning. Santana, judging by her texts, fell asleep around midnight.

Santana had been on her way back from her only class that day (stupid eight am classes) when she got a text from Brittany that made her frown a little. She said that she needed to pick up an extra tutoring session and that she wouldn't be able to go to the dining hall for lunch with her.

To Brittany: Do you get to eat at all?

From Brittany: I don't think so. Can't make it back to dorm. Dining hall will be too busy to get in and get out. I only have like 20 mins to get from Library to dance class.

Santana frowned. Brittany going to dance class having not eaten makes her upset. That can't be good for her. She gets an idea.

To Brittany: I will be waiting outside the library for you. Don't argue. See you then.

From Brittany: Wouldn't have argued. Can't find it in me to ever not see you if it's an option, even if it is just for a few minutes. Also, can we feed ducks this weekend?

Santana smiled and was responding when…

From Brittany: Is that lame? I'm sorry.

To Brittany: Not lame! We'll feed ducks. You're never lame. Even if you are it's cute.

From Brittany: : D See you in a little bit!

Santana likes to think she's a badass. A lot of people would probably agree. But for whatever reason, Brittany causes any and all badass ability to disintegrate without effort. Santana shrugs. Whatever, she'll lose her badassedness if she gets Brittany in return.

She gets back to her apartment and puts her stuff in her bedroom and gets her clothes and does a load of laundry. Then she looks at the clock and decides she can start lunch preparations now. She knows enough about Brittany now to know that she loves both peanut butter, and bananas. She hopes she likes them together as she makes two peanut butter and banana sandwiches. She is giddy. She can't even begin to explain how or why making Brittany lunch makes her so excited. She thinks maybe it's because she'll get to see her when she brings it to her. "If only you saw what I can see…" Santana starts singing to herself.

That stupid fucking song. It gets stuck in her head all the time. She smiles though. Because even though she hates the song, it's so damn appropriate. She starts singing it full out and does not hear the door open or close. If she had, she probably wouldn't be singing into a celery stick right now or dancing like she is.

"Wow." She hears and whips her head around to find Quinn standing there with her eyebrow raised. "First. What are you doing? Second. What are you singing? Third. Why?" Quinn asks. Santana doesn't think she's judging. Well, maybe she is. But Santana thinks she'll manage to not care.

"Making Britt lunch. Some stupid ass song that is on the radio all the time, Brittany likes it. And because…Brittany?" She finishes lamely. That's a lot of Brittany. Quinn shakes her head.

"You like her huh? I've hardly seen you the past few days and when I do your nose is glued to your cell phone. Texting Miss Brittany I'm assuming." Santana opens her mouth to disagree but why? That's all true.

"Yeah Q. I really like her. Like….girlfriend like her." Quinn pauses on her way to the fridge.

"Girlfriend? Like you already are or…?" She resumes her quest for a bottle of water. Trying to play it cool. Looks like she's going to have to have that conversation with Brittany sooner rather than later.

"No, not yet. But I want to be. I think I want to ask her. Is it too soon you think?"

"Maybe. But really only you know the answer to that. Just be careful S. If you get hurt again, I'm going to wreck somebody. I'll pick you up off the floor every time Santana, but just…be sure ok?" Quinn knows Santana has never felt like this before. She can see it in her best friend. She's practically vibrating with all the feelings she has. But even when she didn't feel this much and girls would reject her, or react poorly to news of her penis, she always took it hard. And Quinn was always there. Always would be.

"I know Q. But I'm sure. I'm already sure. Like really positive." She rambles while cutting celery sticks and putting grapes in a bag. "Ok I gotta go. B gets done soon and she needs to eat before dance class." Santana says as she grabs two bottles of water and carries it all out to her car. She's early to get Brittany. She knew she would be but she didn't want to leave the blonde waiting at all.

She's considering finding a CD to put in when she sees Brittany walk out of the door of the library and look around like she's looking for Santana. The Latina hits her horn lightly causing Brittany to look over. The smile that stretches over her face makes Santana's breath catch.

Brittany was expecting Santana to have walked over to meet her, but she's glad she's brought her car. She's tired and sitting down for an extra minute or two might be nice. When she gets into the car she leans over and kisses Santana on the lips, smiling and humming. "Missed you. All the time. Tutoring sucked."

"Will lunch make it better? I hope you like peanut butter and banana." Santana smiles as she hands Brittany her sandwich and puts the celery and grapes between them. Brittany looks over at her with a look of disbelief on her face. "If you don't like it I can maybe hurry and get you some…"

"You made me lunch?" Brittany cuts her off. She feels like she's going to cry. Nobody as ever done something like this before. Sure her parents made her food when she was little, but not in a really long time. Nobody has taken care of Brittany except Brittany. Until now. Santana made her lunch because she didn't want her to be hungry. Because Brittany's well being mattered to her. For no other reason than that she cared.

"Of course B. Why wouldn't I? Is it ok?" She asks in small curious voice. Brittany takes a small bite and smiles. Still trying to keep the tears at bay.

"Perfect. Thank you." She managed to keep the emotion down and smiled at Santana taking another huge bite. The sandwich really was perfect. She popped a few grapes in her mouth. She liked that they were sharing grapes and celery. She liked everything about right now. They finished their sandwiches and Santana started the car and drove towards Brittany's dance class.

"Finish up the grapes B. You gotta dance. That takes energy. Oh! I forgot I brought you water in case you were out or forgot or whatever." She leans into the backseat and grabs the bottle and hands it to Brittany who takes it with a small shake of her head and another smile.

"Seriously perfect." The smile that Brittany is giving Santana makes her feel a little perfect right now. "Ok I have to go. I probably have to study tonight but I know you said you have to go practice piano anyway right?" Santana nods. Knowing they can't see each other all the time but kind of hating it right now. "So I'll just text you? And miss you of course." Santana nods and kisses Brittany.

"Talk to you then B." Another kiss and Brittany is on her way to dance class. She texts Santana afterwards telling her that she's not sure her teacher is very good. She feels bad for thinking it but she knows it's ok to say those kinds of things to Santana.

From Santana: Yeah well I bet it's hard to compete with you. ;)

Brittany laughs. Of course Santana would say that.

To Santana: You've never seen me dance. You don't know that. Goof.

From Santana: I'd like to.

To Santana: You sing for me, I'll dance for you.

From Santana: Challenge accepted Pierce.

Brittany laughs again. She throws her stuff down in her dorm room, saying a brief hello to Rachel before grabbing her stuff to shower. After her shower she gets dressed and heads back to the library. For the record, she thinks, the library is much better with a Santana in it. She thinks about texting Santana that, thinking it'd make her smile. But she doesn't want Santana to show up. The more Santana helps her, the more worried Brittany gets that Santana is going to realize how stupid she is.

Santana texts her when she gets done with her scheduled practice time.

From Santana: How's homework?

To Santana: Ok. How was practice?

From Santana: Killed it. As usual. Just kidding. I mean I did kill it, and I usually do but I try not to be too cocky about it. ;)

Brittany laughs. She's only heard Santana hum, and sing under her breath but she imagines it's beautiful.

To Santana: I bet it's well deserved. But I'll know for sure once you sing for me.

From Santana: Might be my most important performance to date then. How much longer for homework?

Brittany thinks maybe Santana is thinking about showing up at the library to see her if she's going to be there much longer. She doesn't want that. So she lies. It's not really a lie, or maybe it is but she wishes it were true.

To Santana: Not long maybe? I'm tired.

From Santana: Ok. I think I'm going to hang out with Mercedes and Sam tonight. I haven't in a few days. Text me if you need anything.

To Santana: Have fun. Talk to you later.

She goes back to studying. A few hours later (why does time go so fast when she needs it to slow down?) she gets another text from Santana.

From Santana: Hopefully you're in bed, or at least back in your dorm by now. I think I'm going to head to bed. Another early class tomorrow. So stupid.

Brittany knows those words aren't directed at her. But they might as well be. She's been here for hours and is no closer to being finished she thinks. But if she wants to see Santana at all this weekend she's going to have to keep working.

To Santana: Goodnight! Sweet dreams! Lunch tomorrow?

From Santana: Goodnight and sweet dreams yourself. And I wouldn't miss it for anything.

Brittany smiles. She feels lucky. She looks back down at her books and groans a little bit, and presses on.

Thank god for the twenty-four hour library Brittany thinks as she packs up at 5:30am. She's exhausted and by time she gets back to her room and settled down, she'll have to get up in two hours. At least it's something she guesses. She gets back to her room and doesn't even undress before crawling onto her bed and falling asleep. She wakes up to her alarm as soon as she closes her eyes it feels like.

She gets up, changes, grabs her stuff and shuffles off to class praying that she doesn't fall asleep and miss something. Because that's all she needs right now. She has lunch to look forward to, and she does. When she feels like she's starting to fall asleep she thinks about Santana to try and distract herself from how tired she is. She doesn't think she learned much this period.

She makes her way to the dining hall, and sees Santana waiting out front. Santana waves at her, Brittany raises her hand in reply. Trying to smile, trying to act like she has any energy.

Santana can tell something is wrong. Normally, even when Brittany walks she dances. And she always lights up when she see's Santana. Which she isn't doing right now. What confirms Santana's suspicion is that Brittany walks right past a squirrel and doesn't mention it at all. Normally Brittany announces every single animal she sees.

Brittany walks up to Santana and hugs her. Putting a little more weight on her than she meant to. But it feels good not to support herself for a second. Santana just holds her tight.

"What's wrong Britt?" Santana asks as they part and walk through the doors. Brittany just shrugs. Not wanting to tell the truth because then Santana would probably get frustrated and ask why it took so long for her to do her homework.

Santana lets it drop for a minute while they go in and get their food. Once their seated again, she notices Brittany is just pushing salad around her plate and ignoring the Lucky Charms she always gets. They make small talk. Santana is in the middle of looking for something on her phone to show Brittany, a picture that Sam sent her, when she looks up and Brittany is leaning against the wall with her eyes closed. That's it.

"Brittany. What's wrong? Don't you feel well?" She asks, concern lacing her voice.

"I'm ok. Just tired."

"Why are you so tired?" Brittany can't lie to Santana. That's not ok. Santana has been completely honest and Brittany just hopes this won't be the thing that makes Santana sick of her.

"I didn't get to bed till about six ish." Brittany looks down at her plate. She should eat something.

"Six? Britt what were you doing?" Santana had gone to bed around midnight and assumed Brittany did too.

"Studying. That's when I got back from the library." She says sheepishly.

"Brittany! You walked home from the library then? Wait... what were you doing at the library that late? Never mind. Studying. Duh. But why?" Santana is worried. Brittany is really pale and listless. She shouldn't be this tired after one late night.

"I just can't understand anything. Everything is so damn hard. No matter how much tutoring I have I'm just…I'm so fucking stupid." She hisses more to herself than anything. Tears coming to her eyes.

"Hey. No. Britt you aren't stupid you just learn different. You get things fine when you and I study together."

"It's not your job to make sure I get things Santana. I'm an adult. I should be able to get them on my own except I can't. I can't get any of it. And I don't want to ask you for help because I don't want you to think I'm stupid too. Except now you do." Tears are now slowly trickling out of Brittany's eyes. Santana thinks that maybe this issue goes a little deeper than Brittany just being tired and overwhelmed.

"I don't think you're stupid. Not at all. And you don't have to ask, I'm offering. If I can help you, I always will. I know you'd do the same for me. How much sleep did you get Monday night B?"

"Like three hours." She sniffs.

"And the night before?" Santana is definitely concerned now.

"Sunday night? About the same. I did more homework after the coffee shop."

Santana knows she should lecture Brittany about all she had to do was ask at the coffee shop and Santana would have spent more time helping her. But right now she thinks maybe that's not what Brittany needs.

"Ok. Here's what we're going to do. I'm going to pick you up after your last class. You're done at two thirty right?" Brittany nods. "We're going to go back to my place and take a nap. So that way I know you're not doing homework. Because being this tired is only making it harder for you. If you are uncomfortable with us sleeping together, then I can just watch TV in the living room or something. Then we'll eat dinner, and go to the library. I don't have any homework or practice so I can help you with any subjects that I know anything about. Ok? I don't think you're stupid. I'm not annoyed or burdened. Does that sound like an ok plan?"

Brittany doesn't know how she got this lucky. She really doesn't. "You'll nap with me?" Santana smile beams, and she nods. "Ok. That sounds good." Brittany's mood improved after that. Knowing things will be a little better tonight. She starts in on her slightly mushy lucky charms. After lunch and a quick kiss goodbye, Brittany heads to her next class hopeful that she'll be able to stay awake a little longer. Her chest feels lighter. Santana doesn't think she's stupid. Not yet anyway.

Santana runs home to pick up her room before she has to go get Brittany. She keeps it pretty clean so there's not much to do. It upsets her that Brittany didn't tell her that she was struggling so much. She clearly has a lot of problems with school, but whatever. So do a lot of people. Sam struggles pretty bad too. That boy would have failed a long time ago if it weren't for Mercedes and Kurt. Maybe they could all do study groups together, Santana thinks. She'll ask Brittany sometime. But for now, she's perfectly content helping Brittany with everything she can.

She jumps into her car and drives towards the dance building. She wonders what Dance Theory class entails. She bets it's pretty interesting actually. Brittany walks out, still shuffling slightly, still even paler than usual, but she doesn't look so defeated. Santana is glad.

Brittany is just happy to see Santana. Happy to know they're going to go take a nap. She knows Santana likes to cuddle. Saturday she held her the entire movie, and Sunday there were a few times where Brittany had leaned against her at the coffee shop, and Santana's arms just automatically wrapped around her. Brittany loved it. She hoped napping would also mean cuddling. And maybe some kisses.

She gets into the car and Santana brushes some hair behind her ear that had fallen out of her ponytail. "Nap time?" Brittany asks. Santana tucks her bottom lip under her teeth and nods, smiling.

They get back to Santana's apartment and get inside. "Oh I don't have sweats on me. I'm sure I'll fall asleep in my jeans. I'm so tired."

"I can just lend you shorts B. And you're already wearing a tank top." Brittany nods. She likes the idea of wearing Santana's clothes.

Oh my God Brittany is going to be wearing my clothes, Santana thinks to herself. Or really, yells to herself. She's not sure why she loves the idea of Brittany in her clothes so much. But it just feels so realtionshipy. Santana pulls Brittany into her room and goes to her dressers pulling out a pair of old cheerleader shorts, handing them to Brittany.

Brittany just looks around. She notices two guitars, tons of books, tons of cds, more movies, a laptop, a picture of what Brittany assumes is Santana and her brothers. She smiles. "Thank you. I'll go change in the bathroom." Brittany goes to head out.

"Hey Brit are you sure" Santana ducks her head in embarrassment "are you sure it's ok if I don't wear the compression shorts?"

"You better not. I want you comfy and nap ready when I get back." Santana feels lucky too.

Brittany comes back from the bathroom and Santana is pulling the covers back on her bed. She turns around when she hears Brittany come back in. Those shorts are even smaller on Brittany than they are on her. She gulps. But smiles at Brittany who is smiling at her. Always so beautiful.

Brittany thinks Santana is beautiful too. Even in her tank top and basketball shorts. Brittany thinks Santana might just always be beautiful. She's ok with that, she gets to look at her a lot. She glances down to her shorts subtly. Wondering if she could even tell if Santana wasn't wearing the shorts. She definitely can. Basketball shorts hide nothing, and there is the subtle and first real reminder of what Santana showed her. Still, Brittany cares very little that Santana looks different than her. It's just not that important.

Santana beckons Brittany over and takes her hand and then crawls into bed pulling Brittany with her. Santana lays down holding the blankets up for her to lie down. Brittany lays down half on to of Santana, who lowers her arm, and the blanket. Brittany hovers above her for a second before leaning down to capture the Latina's lips. The kiss progressed quickly and soon they were full on making out. Tongues battling for dominance as Santana's hands pressed into the small of Brittany's back.

Santana didn't think making out with Brittany would ever get old. She both feels and hears Brittany moan into her mouth, can feel their breasts pushing together. So amazing. Wait. Too amazing. Oh God. She thinks. Not now. Please not now. She can feel herself starting to get hard. She pushes Brittany gently backwards and slides out from under her and a few inches away. "I'm really sorry Brittany." Santana says desperately hoping Brittany is ok with what just happened. She looks down and picks at an invisible thread on the sheet.

"What? That we kissed? I kissed you. I still want to nap, I just missed kissing you." Brittany says clearly confused. Santana's face turns bright red.

"Not that. I liked that. Maybe too much." She blushes impossibly brighter.

"Oh yeah mean you started to get hard? So. I think I'd be more concerned if you didn't." Santana looks up at her incredulously. Why wasn't she weirded out at all? Santana couldn't get it through her head that Brittany was ok with this. Not tolerated. Not managed to ignore. Just…she didn't care. Santana nodded.

"Santana I don't know how to explain to you how much it doesn't matter to me that you have a dick. Listen. I have a vagina. Right?" Santana gulps. She is acutely aware of this fact, yes. She nods. "And how do you feel about my vagina?"

Santana's eyes get really wide. She wants that to be a rhetorical question. But clearly it's not because Brittany is looking at her with expectant eyes. "Uh. Well… I mean I am looking forward to meeting it some day?" She ducks her head again as Brittany chuckles.

"I feel the same exact way. I feel the same way about what you've got under your shorts, as you feel about what I've got under mine. It's not a big deal. Ok?" Santana nods. Scratch that, it's not that Brittany doesn't care, it's that this was ok. It was all-ok. It was just…it was just Santana to Brittany. Santana was hit with an overwhelming need to cuddle. She lay down and opened her arms, hoping Brittany would get it.

She did. Brittany was so ready to be held. So ready to fall asleep for a little bit. They pulled each other as close as possible. Brittany's last thought before she drifted off was that she desperately wished she'd get to get used to this. It was wonderful.

Santana stayed awake for a while thinking of what Brittany had said, thinking about music. But mostly she was listening and feeling Brittany breathe. She sometimes ran her fingers through Brittany's hair, and kissed her forehead. She eventually fell asleep too.

Her alarm went off too soon. But she wanted to get up because she wanted to get Brittany to the library at a decent time so maybe Brittany could go to bed at a decent time tonight. She had never felt any desire to take care of anyone. Admittedly, she'd grown up a well-kept child. She had four brothers that did anything for her that she needed. And while her mother and father were distant, they took care of her when she needed it. Even Quinn kind of took care of her. But Santana wanted to do things for Brittany. She wanted to help and care for her. What she didn't want to do was wake her up.

"Brit. Brit baby wake up." She says quietly, laying light kisses over her eyes and cheeks. "Wake up baby."

While Brittany had no desire to wake up, how can you not smile when being woken up like that? Plus Santana called her baby. That made her heart tingle. "Mmmmm" Santana smiled. Success.

"Can I make you French toast for dinner?" Brittany cracks open one eye. Is she even asking that? When breakfast is for dinner, the answer is always yes.

"What did I do to deserve you?" Brittany answers. Santana smiles.

"I feel the same way." She leaned in to kiss Brittany. After a moment, they both got up and Brittany went into the bathroom to change back into her clothes. She comes back in hugging her arms around herself. "You cold bab—Brit?" Brittany smiled. So only when she was asleep then?

"Yeah I am baby." She emphasized the baby. Santana blushed. Brittany must have heard her call her baby. Apparently she didn't mind. Noted.

"Want a hoodie?" Brittany nods. Santana hands her her favorite hoodie, excited once again by the prospect of Brittany wearing it.

Brittany notices as Santana hands her a hoodie that it's one of her cheerleading hoodies, and that on the back of it it says 'LOPEZ'. She gets to wear Santana's last name. When did all of this become so exciting? She'd refused to wear anything of Tommy's ever. Santana's hoodie smells just like her, and Brittany loves it.

They go downstairs and head toward the kitchen. Santana gets busy getting the stuff out that she needs to make French toast. "Do you cook?" She asks Brittany.

"Um. Like three things well. I ate a lot of cereal after the age of like ten honestly. But I make awesome chicken salad, salmon, and macaroni and cheese." Santana stops moving before looking slyly back at Brittany.

"Mac and cheese? Like from a box or scratch?" Santana asks with importance. Which is good, because it is important.

"Well the noodles come from a box but I mean I make the rest." Santana was now staring very intently at her.

"I love macaroni and cheese. Like love a lot. Mercedes makes it pretty ok. But…maybe you could make it sometime?" Brittany's eyes light up. She feels like there's not a lot she can do for Santana. Santana helps her study. Santana is making her food. Santana makes sure she sleeps. But she can definitely make her awesome macaroni and cheese.

"Can I use your kitchen to do it?" Santana nods enthusiastically. "It's a date then. Sometime next week?" Santana kisses her. Clearly excited for macaroni and cheese, and the fact that Brittany comes with it is a huge bonus. Brittany laughs lightly.

After they finish, what Brittany has deemed, the greatest French toast of all time, they clean up and head to the car. When they get to the library Santana makes Brittany tell her everything she has to do. Which, honestly, is way less that Santana thought it would be. But she knows it's harder for Brittany than it is for her. So she just smiles at her, and tries to convey some optimism.

Brittany can't believe she didn't just do this earlier. Studying with Santana is so much better than studying alone. And Brittany thinks she might me magic as well. Things make sense when Santana explains them to her. And when she has a question, Santana doesn't get frustrated. It takes them, once again, less time to get through even more than Brittany had hoped to get done. She can't help but wonder if maybe she had had a good tutor like Santana when's he was younger, maybe this wouldn't be so hard now.

They pack up and get back into the car so Santana can drop Brittany off at her dorm. She almost asks Brittany to come back and sleep with her. She thinks that now that she's slept with Brittany in her arms, she's not sure how she'll go back to sleeping alone again. But she doesn't. Because it's a school night. And she doesn't want to become that person who can't just be by themselves. She honestly doesn't mind being by herself, but if Brittany was an option, why would she ever pick anything else?

"I can't thank you enough for everything the past few days. I don't know what I would have done if it weren't for you. Bringing me lunch and making me sleep and helping me study. You're like a sexy guardian angel or something." Santana laughs and shakes her head. "But you have to promise me that you'll always put your school work first. And you won't stay up late with me if you need sleep. And you won't help me if you have stuff to do. Promise me. Because if I have to worry that you're helping me and ignoring yourself it will make it hard for me to ask for help." And Brittany thinks she's stupid, Santana thinks.

"I promise Brit. As long as you promise to let me help before things get bad. Ok?" Brittany nods.

"Oh let me give you this back." She goes to take the hoodie off to give back to Santana.

"No you keep it. In case you get cold or whatever." She tries to play it off. She just likes the idea of Brittany having something of hers when she's not there. Brittany likes it too.

They say their goodnights and Brittany heads up to her room. She showers and gets ready for bed. Before climbing under the blankets, she puts Santana's hoodie back on and cuddles into it. It smells just like her. But it's not quite as good as having the real her. She grabs her phone and snaps a picture of herself with the hood up, cuddled into her pillow and sends it to Santana. Knowing that it will make her smile.

From Brittany: Not quite as good as being with you, but the next best thing till next time.

It does make her smile. A lot. She looks at it for several minutes, letting her heart swell before she sends a message back.

To Brittany: Soon. But until then, I like you in my clothes. Sweet dreams Britt Britt.

She sets the picture to the background of her phone, and looks at it a few more times before she falls asleep.


	5. Chapter 5

**AN: **I'm not really sure what constitutes a chapter as filler, but this might be it. I like it. It answers a question some of you have had. But mostly it's just part two of what had been a way to long chapter.

Sorry it's a day late! I ended up getting commissioned to restore a 120 year old coat. Plus working excessive amounts of over time and not trying to make my underlings cry.

I'm excited to write next chapter, but I wouldn't expect it before next Monday. If it comes earlier than that, excellent. It will be my first foray into smut of sorts. Not full blown smut. So constructive critisism from all of you who write way better G!P than I do would be awesome. Also feedback this week.

You will all tell me if/when it starts to get too dramatic and we need to reign it in a bit won't you? Maybe I just need to talk through this outline business with someone. I really am nervous about it. Anyway. You're probably not reading this. Have fun with the chapter let me know what you think.

* * *

The only day that Brittany thinks she has ever been more prepared for class was the first day, and that's only because they didn't do anything. This is the first day she's felt prepared though, and she knows why. Santana. Today is the first day she's felt like maybe this was possible. Maybe she could keep her grades up and stay in school and become a dancer. Be with Santana. She hoped anyway. Her thoughts were kind of monopolized by the girl right now, and it took everything in her to just focus on the teacher. She'd see Santana shortly for lunch.

Class always took a lot out of her. She always felt like the teachers were making her do two opposite things by making her write to take notes, and making her listen. She's pretty sure she has had a head-ache after every class.

When she gets to the dining hall she sees Santana leaning up against the building wearing skinny jeans and a grey loose v-neck shirt with a scarf on. Her hair was straight and she was wearing sunglasses. Brittany honestly thought she looked like a model out of a magazine. And how she got this lucky to even know Santana, let alone be the center of her affections, she won't ever know. Karma she thinks. Because she saved that bird that one time in high school.

By time Santana sees Brittany she's just feet away from her. She stands up straight and smiles at her. She laughs at herself because she swears when Brittany walks towards her like that, she hears slow romantic music in her head and Brittany is back lit like some cheesy 80's movie. But that's just Brittany, so beautiful she practically glows with it. She laughs at herself again. So fucking cheesy she thinks. She shrugs at herself and reaches her hand out to take Brittany's and pull her in tight wrapping her arms around her lower back.

"Good afternoon beautiful." Brittany giggles in response and kisses Santana's cheek. They go inside, get food, and sit down. "How was class B?"

"I turned in my homework. That was exciting. I don't know, it's just so hard. I sit there and try to listen and take notes but how does anybody do both at the same time? Then I get distracted and several minutes later I've made a list of things to get from the store and completely lost track of the lesson." She takes a big bite of her lucky charms.

Santana thinks about that for a second. She hasn't ever had a problem taking notes and listening at the same time. In fact, don't you have to listen to take notes? She wonders if Brittany maybe has a learning disability, but she doesn't know how to ask. She figures even if she did, she probably wouldn't know because clearly nobody has ever cared enough to get her tested. The thought breaks her heart. Nobody cared enough to do something relatively simple that would have made her life so much easier.

"I'm sorry babe. Anything I can do?" She asked genuinely. She'd do anything she could.

"I think you're already doing a lot for me. And, by the way, you look hot." Santana ducked her head.

"Thanks. You too B. Always."

After lunch as they were heading out Santana's phone beeped. She pulled it out of her pocket. "Gross. Storm warnings for the rest of the day in to the night." She put her phone away.

"I hope I brought an umbrella to school with me. I can't remember."

"Do you need to go somewhere after classes?"

"Nope. Just the LGBTA meeting. You are going right?"

"If you're going to be there, definitely. Can I pick you up so you don't have to walk in the rain either way? I don't mind driving. Parking is free."

Brittany liked the idea of arriving with Santana. She wanted people to know that they were whatever they are, specifically, that Santana was off limits. She nods her head. "Ok, thank you."

"I'll probably have Quinn, Mercedes, and Sam with me. Fair warning."

Brittany laughed. "I like all of them. They're nice. I feel bad I haven't met Sam for gym time this week I'm just so busy." Santana nods. She could suggest that they spend less time together so that Brittany can go to the gym with Sam but she doesn't really like that plan. She wants to hang out with Brittany. Plus have you seen that body? She doesn't really need to go to the gym in the Latina's opinion.

"I gotta run Britt. Class and then I promised Sam and Mercedes I could take them on some errands. So I'll see you tonight." She leans in and kisses Brittany softly. Brittany hugs her and kisses her once more before letting her walk off in the opposite direction.

After her afternoon class Brittany walks back to her dorm, it starts raining just as she got back. Good timing she thought. She gets upstairs and sets her homework on her desk. She was going to go to the library for a little bit but it's raining and she thinks maybe she can do her homework without leaving the room. She briefly considers calling her parents. She hasn't heard from them since they dropped her off. She decides against calling but sends her Mom a text.

To Mom: Hope you guys are doing good at home. I'm doing pretty good. Making new friends.

She doesn't know what else to say so she just sends it. Part of her wants her mom to call her. She wants to know that her mom cares. But she knows her mom won't care, so she tries to let go of that delusion quick. After a few minutes of checking her phone every few seconds, she can feel feelings of rejection prickling in her mind. So instead of letting them get the better of her, she texts the one person she knows will text her back if possible.

To Santana: Just wanted to say I miss you. Class was ok. Hope you errands are going ok.

She lays the phone on her stomach and barely waits a minute before it vibrates. The feeling against her stomach brings comfort, quickly chasing away the cold feelings left by her mother's lack of response.

From Santana: I wish you were with us. They're holding hands and kissing and I miss you. Any more homework? Want to work on it tonight or wait till the weekend? Are we still on for ducks? Clearly I miss you.

This is what being wanted feels like.

To Santana: I wish I was there too. Yes, more homework. No, not tonight. I need a break. And always yes for ducks. Are we going out after the meeting tonight do you know?

After she sends the message she has a moment of panic, she was being presumptuous. Santana could already have plans. Why was she assuming that those plans included her?

To Santana: I'm sorry I assumed I was included in your after meeting plans. You probably already have plans or something.

She hoped Santana wouldn't be angry or frustrated with her. When she received the reply text she knew she wasn't. She should have known Santana wouldn't be frustrated over something like that. She was trying to learn, trying to remember that Santana wasn't him. And Santana doesn't get mad over stupid things.

From Santana: Do you want to go out? I don't have plans that don't involve you as long as you want to be involved in my plans.

From Santana: Wait. What I meant to say was I don't have any plans. Do you want to go to coffee afterwards? Mercedes and Sam said they're in. That was the more normal way to phrase all of that. : )

Brittany was struck with an overwhelming urge to be able to hug Santana right now.

To Santana: I'd love to. Go have fun with them, text me when you're on your way back.

From Santana: If you insist. But I still wish you were here.

Brittany got up off of her bed intending on going for a short walk while the rain seemed to be just barely holding off. But as soon as she got halfway to the door, Rachel came bustling in.

"Brittany! While I know you don't have near the training or talent I have, due to limited options, you will have to do. Can you please listen to these four songs and tell me what you think." Brittany sighed and sat back down, it's not like she had anything better to do.

Santana hates rain. Seriously hates it. Well, no. She actually mostly likes it. Except when it's the thing that stands between her and Brittany. She's not going to make it back in time to get her. Or if she is, they'll be a little late. Maybe they can just skip it and stay in and watch a movie. She's starting to get lost in a day dream when her phone goes off. Hoping it's Brittany she looks at the screen and deflates, but only slightly.

From Q: Bitch. Are you guys going to make it back in time?

To Q: If we do it will be only just. And then we've got to pick up you and Brittany.

From Q: Can Brittany and I just meet you guys there?

To Q: I'm not letting her walk! It's raining!

From Q: Gee thanks. But not what I'm talking about genius. I can go get Brittany and meet you guys there. My car is fixed and I need to run to the store anyway I can just grab her on the way back.

Santana frowns. She wanted to pick Brittany up. She wanted to go to the meeting with her. She shakes her head, she is being childish.

To Q: That will work. Just text her first so she knows. Or I can if you'd rather.

From Q: I am capable of texting her. You're getting soft Lopez.

She smiles because it's a little bit true, and it's only ok that Quinn says it because it's Quinn. She's allowed to notice things like that about Santana and it not be a big deal. But maybe, she has a sneaking suspicion, that it would be ok no matter what because, well, Brittany.

Brittany has just finished listening to the four songs for a second time because she made the mistake of saying that she didn't remember what the first one sounded like by time she got to the fourth. Which, now having heard them all twice, she thinks maybe she just heard eight different songs because none of them sounded familiar. She felt her phone vibrate in her pocket, she quickly pulled it out looking for any form of distraction.

From Quinn: Hey Brittany, it's Quinn. Santana is running a bit behind so I'm going to pick you up for the meeting. But I was wondering if it was ok for me to come early to get you. Are you ready now?

To Quinn: I am. Everything is ok with San though right?

From Quinn: Yes, she's fine. Just late. I'll be outside in two minutes.

"Oh sorry Rach I got to go, lost track of time. Sorry!"

"Wait which one was best?"

"Uh…three." She answered arbitrarily. Because honestly, she couldn't remember which was which if she had to. She grabbed her keys, phone, and her wallet and ran out of the door. By time she got out there, Quinn was waiting.

"Hey Brit, sorry for short notice."

"Nope it's all good. My roommate was singing at me. I was glad to leave." Quinn smiled a tight lip smile at her. Brittany always felt a little nervous around the other blonde. Quinn always looked at her in a funny way, like she was somehow suspicious of Brittany.

"So the reason that I picked you up early is because I have wanted to talk to you now for a few days but I haven't had an opportunity. This one kind of fell into our laps." Brittany nodded like she understood. She had no idea where this was going. "What are your intentions with Santana?" Brittany stared at her blankly for a moment. She intended to make her smile? The question is confusing.

"What?" She guessed if nothing else that answer would buy her a few more seconds to think.

"What do you want with her? Why are you with her?" Well those were easy questions to answer.

"I want to be around her. And because when I'm around her she makes me smile, and I make her smile." Brittany nodded as if to say that was her final answer. Quinn did her best to not roll her eyes. Is this girl for real? To sweet, she thought. Maybe straight forward would be the best approach.

"You're not with her for some cruel joke are you?" Brittany shook her head emphatically to the negative. She'd never ever do something like that. She was so thrown by the question she lost all words she might have used to defend herself. "And you're not doing this because of Santana's…addition. You don't have some fetish or something?" Now Brittany was completely confused. Why was Quinn asking her these things? She knows she shouldn't be offended because Quinn is just watching out for Santana. And she's not offended. But her feelings are a little hurt.

She looks down into her lap, nodding her head slower this time. "I'm not really sure why you think I could do those things but I promise I'm just here because I really like her, and I want to make her happy. I'm sorry if I've done something wrong." Ok. Quinn felt bad now. Brittany clearly was being honest about her intentions, and then on top of that she upset her. Santana was going to be pissed, but Quinn needed to do it to feel ok about the situation.

"You didn't do anything, I just watch out for her that's all. She's my best friend. I'm sure your friends would do the same." Brittany sniffs. Is she crying? Oh no Santana really is going to kill her.

"I understand Quinn. You're a good friend. Can I get out now?" Quinn nods and then realizes Brittany isn't looking at her.

"Yeah. Brittany I'm sorry I" But Quinn was cut off by someone else opening her passenger side door. Santana pulled Brittany out of the car and smiled as Brittany hugged her.

"Hey B. Got back earlier than I thought." She felt Brittany nod into her neck and noticed she was hugging her a little tighter than usual, and her face was buried closer to her neck than usual.

"Everything ok Britt?" Santana asked concerned. She felt Brittany pulling away from her. When she looked at her face, she could tell she was upset about something.

"You know that I like you right? That it's not for any reason other than that you are you." Santana nodded. Her eyebrows creased in confusion. Where was this coming from. Then she looked down and saw Quinn deliberately not watching them with guilt written all over her face.

"Where is this coming from? What did Q say to you?"

"She was just being a good friend I just didn't want you to think those things were true and she just made me sad a little." Unacceptable.

"What the fuck Q? What did you say to my girlf-Brittany?" She almost slipped. She saw the side of Brittany's mouth quirk up in a smile, and Quinn's eyebrow arch. "What did you say to upset her?" She was mad. "All you were going to do was pick her up so she didn't have to walk in the rain? How did this turn into something else?" She's starting to yell. Her temper getting the better of her.

She watches Quinn open her mouth to give her what will probably be an explanation that will make her even madder. Just as she was about to open her mouth to cut Quinn off she feels arms wrap around her from behind and hold her tight. How can she be angry when all she can feel is Brittany all around her?

"Don't be mad San. She was just being a good friend. I'm ok. Can we go inside now it's starting to rain again?" And just like that, Santana was fine. With one last mean look at Quinn for posterity, she walks away with her hand in Brittany's. Unaware, or uncaring about the looks that Quinn, Mercedes and Sam are giving her and each other as they walk into the building.

When they got inside a bunch of people said Hi to Santana and asked her how classes were going and if she had any performances coming up. Santana answered them but her even when her focus wasn't directly on Brittany, it still kind of was. She never let go of her hand, and introduced her to some people that hadn't been there previous weeks or had forgotten each other's names by now.

They all sat together, but Santana noticed Quinn was quieter than usual. Good. She should be ashamed. Had she not met Brittany? How could she not know that she was the most genuine and sincere person Santana had ever met? She was also sensitive. How could Quinn's little I'm the best friend and you better not hurt her or I'll hurt you speech not hurt Brittany's feelings? Just as she was getting angry again she felt Brittany pull their hands up to her lips and place a small kiss on Santana's before lowering them both back to her lap. She hadn't even been looking at Santana when she did it. She was talking to Sam. How did she just know to distract her? Santana thought. Maybe luck. Or Santana was starting to think there was something to this crazy connection she felt with Brittany.

"Ok everybody let's get started!" Kurt clapped and yelled over the noise in the room. People settled down and took seats so the meeting could start. He announced a bunch of campus events that he thought sounded interesting. Then they talked about a speaker they were bringing to campus next month to talk about bisexuality. Brittany thought that could be interesting, to hear about how other people thought of being bi. She squeezed Santana's hand to show interest. The Latina looked at her and nodded.

"So, next order of business, the annual talent slash drag show. We've already booked the headlining drag acts, so now we just need to put sign up sheets out for anyone who wants to be in the show. You can win prizes, and anyone can do just about anything. There is a board set up to approve talent acts but pretty much anything that isn't to out there gets in. I'll email out the information tonight, and please let anyone else know that might be interested."

"Are you going to do it this year Satan?" Mercedes asked Santana who scowled at the nickname. Brittany just laughed.

"I don't know. You? Brit would you do it?" Mercedes said she was going to do it, and win this year. Brittany just shrugged. It could be fun to do something that she wasn't really doing in any of her dance classes.

"Maybe. But I'd like to watch you perform." Brittany replied sweetly. Santana blushed. She's not even sure why, but the effects this girl has on her are crazy.

"Santana aren't you kind of a drag queen? You've got a dick and you dress up like a girl and sing. Or…I guess you're more of a tranny?" Brittany is watching Santana's face as she hears Anna say this. She watches Santana's face fall. Santana looks at Brittany and shrugs as if to say it's no big deal. Everybody knew already, Anna made sure of that.

But it was a big deal. It was a big deal to Brittany because this was private business. Nobody was calling Anna out on her vagina. More importantly nobody was standing up for Santana. Nobody was kicking Anna out for blatant displays of discrimination and bullying. And she wasn't going to stand for it.

In the half second of dead silence that followed Anna's comment, Brittany made up her mind. "Isn't this club supposed to be about supporting each other, building community in a world that doesn't always accept us? Raising awareness, helping to stop bullying? But you let it happen right here in your own meetings. This isn't the first time she's said something and I've only been to a few meetings. I don't think this is an organization for me if they are going to be so completely hypocritical. She stood up to walk out but the President of the organization spoke first.

"She's right. Anna, one more comment from you during meetings and I will be forced to ask you to not come back."

Yeah now Quinn feels like a complete bitch. Making Brittany sad when clearly she cared enough to stand up to the entire group even when Santana was playing the comment off. She approves of this girl.

Santana looks at Brittany, eyes wide. Brittany is looking back at her adoringly. "It's ok San. I got your back."

"Thanks Britt Britt" She whispers. She's embarrassed that that went down, and shocked at Brittany's response to it but mostly she's just acutely aware at how hard her heart is pounding with all the feelings Brittany gives her.

The rest of the meeting goes by without event except the dirty looks that Anna kept throwing their way. Santana and Brittany didn't really notice, but Mercedes did, and she threw dirty looks right back, much to the amusement of Sam.

After the meeting the group decided to go to the coffee shop to hang out for a little bit. Brittany is glad to be spending more time with Santana but also really excited to be accepted into her group of friends. Quinn seems to be trying really hard to make sure Brittany knows she is included and accepted.

They walk outside and towards their cars, past a group of girls standing near the doors. "Stupid confused girl. Bet Santana makes a great transition for you from boys to real women." Anna meanly yells in Brittany's direction. Santana can deal with Anna's comments toward her. But she won't ever, ever allow someone to call Brittany stupid when it's clearly an issue she struggles with so deeply.

"What the fuck did you just say bitch?" Santana turned around faster than most of them had even processed what was said. Brittany heard though. How could Anna know she was stupid, she didn't even know her? The idea weighed heavy on her. One of her biggest insecurities was being called out to a group of new friends by a girl who didn't even know her. Was it that obvious?

Sam reacted the quickest after Santana. He grabbed her arm to hold her back from going after Anna but she wouldn't stop struggling to pull away. Quinn came over and stood in front of her, blocking Anna from view. "Brittany's sad Santana. Go fix that. Anna isn't ever worth it."

Hearing that Brittany was sad caused two conflicting reactions. One, at first she had just wanted to yell at Anna, maybe scare her a little, but now she wanted to kick the shit out of her. And two, she wanted to go comfort Brittany. The stronger emotion won out, and after flipping Anna off, she turned around to see Brittany head down, and shoulders hunched in defeat.

"Baby it's ok. I know that's not why you're with me. And I know you aren't stupid."

"You say I'm not stupid but it's obvious enough that she can call me out on it without even knowing me. And in front of everyone else too." Brittany's eyes start to tear up and Santana hugs her.

"B. You are not stupid. Nobody here thinks you are stupid. They all think she is, and you're right, she doesn't know you. She's just saying shit to get a rise out of us and it has nothing to do with you. She is just a bitch. Honestly. I've known her for a year now, and she's nothing but a bitch." Brittany felt better. Santana's words helped but the hug helped more. Her hugs were magic, Brittany decided.

She let go of Santana and nodded. Just then Mercedes came up and hugged her. "Don't listen to her Brit. We are you're friends, and we know she's an idiot." Sam nodded. And Quinn smiled at her. Friends? Brittany thought. She knew they were Santana's friends and that they let her into their group but she thought it was mostly just because Santana liked her. But maybe it wasn't just that, maybe they were her friends too. The thought made her happy. Good friends.

They got to their cars, Brittany with Santana and Mercedes and Sam with Quinn. Nobody discussed it, it just happened, which Santana was grateful for. A few minutes alone with Brittany might calm her down. She was still really angry. Santana opened the door for Brittany but before she got in she kissed her deeply. "I needed that." Santana smiled after they parted.

"Me too." Brittany responded and got into the car. Santana got in and they drove towards the coffee shop in comfortable silence. Brittany thought about how the day had gotten dramatic quickly but that it was going to be ok now. She also thought about something she had almost forgot about…Santana had almost called her her girlfriend. Brittany realizes how much she wants that. She wonders if it's to fast, she had sworn that if she were going to get into a relationship again, it would be carefully. But they were practically in a relationship already. Why not make it official? She'd love to call Santana her girlfriend. She'd love to be introduced to other people by Santana as her girlfriend. She sighed happily.

"What's up B?" Santana asked running her thumb over Brittany's knuckles.

"Nothing. Just happy."

"Good, me too." The Latina responded.

They pulled up outside the coffee shop and met the others inside. They got their coffee and all sat down at a table together. Sam was telling them a story about someone he had seen on campus wearing a helmet with a metal detector, and they were laughing when a thought, or question rather, came to Brittany.

"Why does Anna say such mean things about you?" Brittany asked Santana quietly trying not to let the rest of the group hear. But they did. She felt Quinn bristle beside her, desperately hoping it was in response to Anna, and not the fact that Brittany asked.

"For a really stupid reason." Mercedes answers. Santana figures that telling Brittany isn't really a big deal. Mostly, none of them really even understand why.

"Last year Quinn dragged me to my first LGBTA meeting because she thought I should meet some more accepting non-judgmental girls."

"Not such a good plan on my part apparently. But it seems to be working out ok now a year later." Quinn interjects, looking at Brittany with a small smile. One that Brittany returns gratefully.

"Yeah…I think so." Santana squeezed Brittany's hand. "But anyway, I met Anna. And of course my first introduction to her wasn't 'hi my name is Santana and I'm a girl with a dick' because who does that?" They all laugh a little. Brittany just squeezes Santana's hand. "And even though she was kind of a bitch, we hung out a few times, made out a few times. Then she started talking about wanting to be my girlfriend and stuff, and I didn't really like her that much but I'd never had a girlfriend and the idea was kind of exciting. So against the better judgment of Quinn, I'd decided to go that route. But first I thought I should probably tell her my secret. I figured she'd be ok with it. Lesbians are women who like women, and I am a woman. Plus she seemed really open minded, which isn't actually true but I had deluded myself into thinking so." Brittany thought that maybe Anna was the opposite of open minded. And really stupid herself, because who would pass up an opportunity to be with Santana, even though she's glad Anna did because now she gets the opportunity.

"So one night we were making out and watching a movie, and she goes to kind of move it beyond that point so I stopped her and told her that I had a penis. I told her that I was a girl, that my boobs are real and I've never had any cosmetic surgery but she didn't hear any of that. She just freaked out. She accused me of lying to her and all this stuff. Which, maybe I should have told her earlier but I honestly didn't think it would be a problem. And ever since then, she's been a bitch to me."

"That's the entire story, so you can see why none of us understand. Like, if it's really that big of a deal, then just don't date but being cruel? That's just ridiculous." Sam added in. They all nodded. It was ridiculous. And Brittany was glad none of them understood because she didn't either. The topic quickly moved on to the giant list of movies Brittany hasn't seen. Sam decided he would be making her a must watch list soon.

When it started to get late and everyone started to get tired, they decided to leave. Santana drove Brittany back to her dorm while the blondes' thoughts still on this whole girlfriend thing from earlier. She didn't know how to approach the subject. She also didn't want to ask Santana and then get rejected because it's too early or something. So she decided she'd just drop a hint. A really obvious hint. When they pulled up they sat in the car for a few minutes talking about potential weekend plans. Brittany leaned over and kissed Santana, relishing in the feeling of warm lips against hers. They fit perfectly together. They said their goodbyes and their goodnights and Brittany got out of the car. But before she closed it she leaned back in.

"I would be, you know." She said with a smile.

"Huh?" Santana was clearly confused.

"You're girlfriend. Goodnight Santana." She winked and closed the door. Walking up the steps to her dorm, Santana staring with a dumb expression on her face.

Wait, what? What does that mean? Does that mean she should ask? Or are they? Or was that Brittany asking or? Before her brain exploded, she knew she needed to talk this out with someone. Quinn was probably asleep. But she knew someone who definitely wasn't.

To Sam: Need advice ASAP. Coming over now.

From Sam: K. Putting pants back on.

Ew she thought. Why were his pants off? She put the car in drive and drove over to his house.

* * *

**AN 2: **Also did Santana telling Brittany she would like to meet her vagina make anyone else laugh from last chapter? Because it still makes me laugh. Who says that?


	6. Chapter 6

**AN:** Holy shit this is long. Um. Also, I tried this whole smut thing. I'm not really sure how it went. Because I refuse to reread it for two reasons. One, I will probably just delete the entire sequence and it's better to try and fail then to not try at all and I told you it'd be there and so it is. Also this chapter is 19 pages long. And I don't have the energy to reread it right now. So...if there are errors (which I'm sure there are) you could let me know, and I'll probably do some corrections tomorrow. But I was proud of getting it done when I told you guys there wouldn't be another chapter till at least Monday. And it's so much earlier! I was stressed, so I took it out on my keyboard.

Anyway. Please please please let me know what you think. I am overwhelmed in the best way possible by your responses and when my life gets less crazy I will respond to all of you. And remember, seriously guys, first time writing smut (if it even is really smut?) or anything like it ever. So nervous for you guys to read this.

Enjoy?

* * *

While Santana hated storms because they kept her from things she wanted (mostly Brittany, and really just today) Brittany actually really hates storms. And she'd been lying in bed listening to a huge one for two hours now. Rain wasn't so bad, that was easily dealt with by way of umbrellas and rain boots. But thunder and lightening scared her. But she was determined to just deal with her fear. She's had to since she can remember. Her parents never took kindly to what they'd call "irrational fears" and her sister wasn't exactly warm and comforting. So she dealt. Lying in bed she concentrated on other things than the flashing lighting and loud thunder.

She focused on the comfort of the star night light that Rachel had insisted they use because she didn't want to fall getting up in the middle of the night. Brittany had no arguments, she didn't really like the dark. Then she thought about Santana. She opened her phone to look at a picture she'd snuck of her at the coffee shop. She could do this, she could wait out the storm. Until a particularly bright lighting bolt and loud crack of thunder must have hit a power line or something, because the hallway light that she could see under the door went out, as did all of the little lights in their room that indicated something had power. And of course, the little star night light. All she had was the light of her phone.

She took a few deep breaths. She was shaking she was so scared. Rachel hadn't even woken up. She briefly considered waking her but decided against it. She didn't need her roommate thinking she was a baby. She could hear commotion in the dark hallways, apparently other people had noticed the lights were out. The thunder and lighting raged on outside, adding to Brittany's complete terror. She looked outside and from what she could tell it looked like the other buildings didn't have power either. But they had hallway lights it looked like. Why didn't they?

She got out of bed by her cell phone light and went into the hallway to see if anyone knew what was going on. Her floor RA came out to tell them that the power was out all over campus, and that for whatever reason their emergency generator hadn't kicked in for this dorm, and that they were doing what they could but it would probably be a while.

Brittany went back into her pitch-black room, still scared. She didn't know what to do. She knew she wouldn't be able to sleep, it was to dark, and she felt lonely and scared even though Rachel was right there. She wondered if Santana had power. Even if she didn't, she knew she'd feel better just being with the girl. But she didn't want to seem needy or clingy or like a baby. She wondered what would happened if the situation were reversed, if Santana were scared. Brittany would want to know, would want to help if she could. She'd feel bad if Santana didn't call if there was something Brittany could do.

She was still embarrassed though. So she decided to send one text. If she didn't get a response she'd assume the Latina was sleeping and just deal with this on her own.

To Santana: Hey San. How are you? Do you have power?

She went over to her bed and grabbed her laptop hoping that the light of the screen would comfort her a little bit, even if she couldn't do anything on it. But it was dead, of course.

Santana was sitting on the couch with Sam who had a battery operated light up globe (seriously who is this kid?) illuminating the living room. The storm had started to pick up about the time that she got there two hours ago. Since then they've just been talking about the current situation Santana finds herself in.

She told Sam what Brittany said, and asked him what he thought that meant. Sam assumed it was pretty obvious that Brittany wanted to be her girlfriend before she went and dropped that bomb of a hint. But apparently Santana is oblivious. Since then, they'd been discussing romantic ways for Santana to ask Brittany to be her girlfriend. She wasn't totally settled on any of them, but whatever it is, she knew it'd take a lot of planning. That's the kind of thing Brittany deserves.

She got the text from Brittany about twenty minutes after the power went out. Sam was trying to convince her to ask Brittany to be her girlfriend in Navi, and Santana was mostly ignoring him. "I think power must be out on campus too. I just got a text from Britt. Have you heard from 'Cedes? Does she have power?"

"Nope. Kurt has apparently lit eighty different scented candles. That probably smells terrible." Santana nods. She types back a response.

Brittany had taken to counting second between lightning and thunder to see how far the storm was. She wondered if that was even valid at all. Either way, she never got past five. It was crazy out there. Her phone vibrated and she knew without looking it was Santana.

From Santana: Hey boo. I'm ok, I'm at Sam's right now, but no he doesn't have power, and we don't have it at our apartment either. What about you? Power? Are you ok?

Brittany bit her lip. She could easily respond that she was ok, just bored because it was dark and she had no power, or she could be honest. She wanted to be honest. She didn't want lies to mess with whatever this was that they had.

To Santana: I really hate storms, and I really hate the dark. So I'm kind of scared. Plus our emergency lights won't come on so I can't sit in the hallway or anything.

Santana read the text with creased eyebrows. Brittany was scared. She didn't like that at all.

To Brittany: Well, I don't have power at my place, but we are at least allowed to have candles. I could come get you if you wanted. Or I could go buy you a flashlight or something and drop it off.

Santana sincerely hoped it'd be the first option, but knew that whatever she had to do to make Brittany feel better, she would.

The idea of spending the night with Santana, cuddling and safe made Brittany breathe a sigh of relief as she responded.

To Santana: Could I stay over? Are you sure it's ok?

She was pretty sure she knew the answer to that one, and was proven correct when she received a text less than a minute later.

From Santana: Absolutely. I'll be there in five. Wear PJ's.

Santana said goodbye to Sam who, of course, understood why Santana was leaving. He didn't want Brittany scared either. Plus, he was kind of tired anyway.

Brittany thought about packing school books and clothes but remembered that Santana had an earlier class than she did so she could just come back here when the brunette went to class and change and get her stuff. So she pulled sweat pants on over her little shorts, threw on some flip flops, and pulled the hood of Santana's hoodie over her head and made her way down to the front entrance using her cell phone as a flash light.

When she sees Santana's car pull up she runs down the stairs and jumps into the car as quickly as possible, trying not to let the wind take the door off.

"Thank you so much. I couldn't sleep or do anything because I was scared and there were no lights." Brittany breathes as soon as she gets the door shut. She's still shaking from left over fear, plus now she was wet and cold. "Which is kind of stupid because who's afraid of the dark?"

"You can be afraid of the dark, it's ok. I don't like it when I'm alone either. I don't really mind being in the dark as long as I have the option to turn on the light. But when that option isn't there, I get kind of freaked too." Which is totally true, she didn't stop running into her brother's room during power outages until she was at least fourteen. And he'd just laugh and let her sleep in his bed with him. "Let me turn up the heat, you look freezing." She turned the knob, and then because she wanted to and could, she leaned over and kissed Brittany gently.

Santana desperately wanted to ask about earlier but first she wanted to get Brittany warm, dry, and feeling safe. She didn't even know what she wanted to ask her. She knew she wanted to do something big and romantic for her, but she also kind of wanted to know if Brittany was serious or if it was a joke. She hoped it was serious.

She took Brittany's hand and drove towards her apartment. She went slowly because it really was bad outside. Not to mention there were down trees everywhere, guess that explains the power outage. When they got back to her house she used her cell phone light to get them in the front door. "Let me get some candles or a flashlight or something." She said trying to remember where any of those things were. Then the beam of her flashlight passed over a pile of candles and a note. She read it out loud.

"Santana, don't forget to blow these out before you fall asleep. Seriously, you almost set the house on fire last time. Love you bitch. Quinn" And under the note there were a dozen small candles, a lighter, and a small flashlight.

"She must really care about you." Brittany noted helping Santana grab some of the candles.

"She does. We both care about each other like sisters. We fight like sisters too though." She smiled remembering the events of earlier. She guesses she can't be too mad now.

"My sister and I fight a lot. But she doesn't really care about me. And I do care about her but she's never given me a chance or reason to show it." Brittany said nonchalantly. It makes Santana a little bit sad that Brittany doesn't have a good relationship with her sister like she does her brothers.

They head back into Santana's bedroom. Santana set the candles up and lit them all with Brittany's help. Then they decided to change into PJ's. Brittany really just needed to shed her, now wet, outer layer, so Santana went to the bathroom to change and brush her teeth. When she reentered the room she saw Brittany standing there in a slightly to short tank top, and shorts so small she thought they might be on the boarder of the differences between underwear and shorts. She is also lit by all of the candles and Santana can't help herself when she goes over to Brittany and hugs her tight and kisses her deeply, holding her tight.

When they need to part for air, they rest their foreheads together and sway gently back and forth. Santana lets herself think, just for a moment, how amazing it would be to call the girl in her arms her girlfriend, and just like that, she has to talk to Brittany about it.

"Earlier, what you said about you would be my girlfriend, what did you mean?"

Brittany pulled away just barely to look at Santana's face. "That I would be. If you wanted. That I want that." She answered quietly. This moment was starting to feel so big.

"So are we?" Santana responds lamely.

"I don't know, you didn't ask." Brittany responds and kisses Santana lightly.

"I want to. I do. I just, I was planning this romantic thing and there was probably going to be a speech about how amazing you are. And I don't want to ruin giving you this romantic scenario because you deserve it Britt. You deserve everything good."

"Look around you San" Brittany says gently. "Not that I need anything big and romantic, because all of that would be lost to the fact that you'd just asked me the best question anyone ever has, but this is pretty romantic. We're standing in a candle lit room, slow dancing to no music, after you just saved me from staying up all night afraid. That's the most romantic thing ever I think." Santana smiles and kisses Brittany. She hadn't even thought of that. This unplanned thing turned out to be pretty amazing.

"Brittany, would you please be my girlfriend?" Brittany responds yes into Santana's lips as she kisses her hard. One kiss leads to another and shortly they're making out. Santana's tongue darts out to trace Brittany's lower lip, making her moan softly. Brittany starts to push her back towards the bed. When Santana's legs bump the edge of the bed she slowly sits down pulling Brittany with her. Brittany's long legs straddle Santana's lap, as their bodies press tightly together continuing to kiss deeply.

Brittany pulled back from Santana slightly to catch her breath, immediately moving her lips down to Santana's neck. She kissed and sucked softly at the skin there, occasionally biting lightly.

Santana gripped Brittany's waist hard as if to ground her. She felt that unmistakable feeling and knew she was starting to get hard. She didn't know whether or not she should stop what was happening. She knew she didn't want to, but she didn't want Brittany to do anything she didn't want to, and she definitely didn't want to freak her out.

Brittany could feel Santana's dick stirring. She grinned into Santana's neck. She loved that she had the ability to make Santana feel this way. This felt amazing. Kissing Santana, touching her. It never had felt this way before. She didn't know it could. And while she knew she wasn't ready to have sex yet, she thought she might be ready for other things.

Just as she removed her lips from Santana's neck to re-attack the other girl's lips in light of her revelation, Santana pushed her away. "We should probably slow down. I don't want anything to happen before you're ready." Santana said breathily. Brittany could tell how badly Santana had struggled with the decision to stop what they were doing, which just made her more certain in her decision.

"San I don't think I'm ready for sex yet. But aren't there a bunch of other bases?" Santana cocked her head to the side trying to process what exactly Brittany had said and meant. Brittany decided to help her out. She reached her hands down and lifted her tank top over her head leaving her naked from the waist up. Santana's eyes went wide.

"Br- uh Britt are you sure?"

"I'm sitting on your lap with my shirt off. Please touch me. Or kiss me. But Santana, do it now." Santana leaned forward, putting her hands on either side of Brittany's face and pulled her into her, kissing her passionately. She slid one of her hands down Brittany's neck, then moved her hand to Brittany's back where she lightly ran it up and down for a few seconds. She then trailed her hand down to Brittany's abdomen, feeling the muscles quiver under her fingertips. She continued her upward journey until her fingers reached the swell of Brittany's breast and cupped it, gently massaging.

Brittany gasped into Santana's mouth when she felt her fingers graze her nipple before taking her whole breast in her hand. When Santana started to massage, she ground down onto Santana's hard on. Their lips parted, foreheads touching as Santana started to gently tug Brittany's nipple. Brittany closed her eyes and let herself feel what it felt like to be truly, truly turned on for the first time that she could remember.

Santana gasped as Brittany ground down on her dick again, thrusting upwards slightly. She opened her eyes when she felt Brittany's hands tugging at the hem of her shirt. She pulled back and lifted her arms slightly so Brittany could pull it off. Brittany placed her hands on Santana's collarbone and pushed gently, indicated to Santana to lie down. As she did she slid back, lying completely on the bed. Brittany followed, still straddling Santana's hips. She looked down at her girlfriend.

"You are so unbelievably beautiful Santana." And she was. Lying there halfway undone. Hair spread out around her, lips parted, pupils blown, chest heaving. Brittany didn't think she had ever seen anything or anyone quite so beautiful. She trailed all of her fingertips down Santana's neck, over her collarbone, over her breasts and down her abdomen. She then reached up and cupped both of Santana's breasts, which were considerably larger than her own. "I think you might be perfect." She whispered before leaning down to reconnect their lips.

Santana moaned and arched her chest up into Brittany's hands. She had never felt anything this amazing. Even if it didn't go beyond this, she'd be happy. She reached her arms up to run her fingertips down Brittany's ribcage, feeling her breath jump every time she traced over another rib.

Brittany started to kiss down Santana's neck and quickly moved down to trail her tongue along Santana's collarbone. She looked up to see Santana's eyes squeezed tightly shut and could feel the Latina's fingers gripping and ungripping her waist. She continued her downward journey, placing light kisses across each breast until she took her left nipple into her mouth and sucked gently. Santana moaned Brittany's name quietly. The blonde smirked as she switched to the right nipple, sucking slightly harder, and eliciting a slightly louder response.

She pulled away with a light pop as Santana's nipple fell from her lips, and moved so she was no longer straddling Santana. The Latina did her best to not look disappointed, but she supposes she failed, as she next heard Brittany chuckle lightly. She looked at the blondes face. Her hair was messy and half fallen out of the bun she previously had it in, but she was still the prettiest girl Santana had ever seen.

Brittany held Santana's gaze as she trailed her fingers down to the waistband of Santana's shorts. When the Latina realized what Brittany was doing, her eyes opened comically wide for the second time that evening. "Can I take these off?" Brittany asked, managing to sound innocent despite what she was requesting. Santana nodded. But then hesitated and put her hands over Brittany's hands.

"Could you maybe kiss me first? I just… I need a second." Brittany nodded and leaned down and kissed her as gently as she could. They were both nervous. For very different reasons. Brittany was nervous because she was traveling into activities that had always been a great source of discomfort for her, even if she currently felt the exact opposite of discomfort. Santana felt nervous because she'd never exposed herself to someone she cared so much about, and who honestly cared about her in return. The only other girl that had ever seen her naked had been someone who did it on a bet, and she hadn't even been completely naked.

After a few seconds of reassuring kisses, Santana gave Brittany's hands a gentle nudge, indicating that she was ready and then pulled her hands back up, gripping Brittany anywhere she could. Trying to keep the feeling of safety between them. For both of them. Brittany slowly pulled Santana's shorts down, not looking anywhere but Santana's face, smiling gently. When she got Santana's shorts down to her thighs Santana kicked them the rest of the way off. Brittany kissed her once more before letting her eyes travel slowly down Santana's body.

Santana closes her eyes, almost as if she's bracing herself against the negative words that obviously never come. She hears a very light gasp. She opens her eyes and finds Brittany looking at her, smile playing across her mouth, cheeks lightly pink. "You're bigger than I thought." Santana smiled in response. She knew she was above average (not that she measured or anything) but hearing it made some part of her feel good even though she wasn't really responsible for the size.

Brittany's hand had been resting on Santana's hip. She looked down again and traced some of the indented lines she saw, still there even though Santana had removed her compression shorts a while ago. "I hate that they hurt you." She mumbled, gently tracing a line across her abdomen. Then she slid her hand lower and grasped the base of Santana's cock.

"Britt-" Santana moaned unsure of what she meant to follow that with. She hissed as Brittany very slowly, much slower than the Latina ever stroked herself, stroked up towards the tip. When she got there, she ran her thumb slowly over the sensitive head, and across the slit. She watched Santana's reactions, trying to remember what she seemed to like. She seemed to like everything.

She slowly stroked back downwards and as she did, Santana's hips bucked up into her hand. Brittany smiled. This is amazing, she thought to herself. She didn't want to think about Tommy at all tonight, or ever, but she couldn't help but compare at least the feelings she got. This was amazing and wonderful and sexy and she was wet. Really really wet. She didn't think any of those things had ever happened with him.

She stroked back up, glancing back and forth between her hand and Santana's face. The brunette had her eyes shut tightly, and her bottom lip between her teeth, clearly holding back any noises she wanted to make. Brittany leaned her head down and nudged Santana's jaw line with her nose. "Open your eyes." She requested quietly. Santana complied and her brown eyes popped open, quickly locking with blue. She pressed her lips to Santana's and then whispered, "Does this feel good?" onto the Latina's lips.

"Oh God Britt yes." As she answered, Brittany squeezed slightly harder when she hit the base and drew her hand up with the increased pressure. A significant amount of precum was leaking out of the slit, and Brittany thought she knew what Santana wanted, so she started to go faster. Eyes still locked with Santana's.

Santana threw her head back as she felt Brittany's hand increase in speed. Nothing had ever felt this good, she was sure. She knew now that was true. It took every bit of self-restraint not to just buck up into Brittany's hand repeatedly. She reopened her eyes and saw Brittany staring intently at her face wearing a crooked smile with a look of what Santana could only describe as adoration.

Brittany slowed her strokes again for a moment, and released Santana's shaft, earning a quiet whimper from the Latina. She reached further down and lightly stroked her balls, noting how soft the neatly trimmed hair was. She grasped them lightly and Santana gasped. Brittany smiled, and straddled Santana's thigh so she could use both hands. She started to jerk Santana off again, watching the girls hands as they gripped her bed sheets hard with her eyes shut tightly, chest arched up in the air.

Santana tried to relax her body slightly. If she doesn't, she's going to cum soon. And she doesn't want to embarrass herself. So she tries to take a deep breath and relax. She opens her eyes to look at Brittany, which was a mistake. When she opened her eyes she saw her topless girlfriend, breasts bouncing with the movements of her hands, jerking her off while gently tugging her balls. She felt the tension in her stomach increase ten fold. She shot forward onto her elbows. "I'm gonna….gonna" And then she did, she came all over her own stomach, Brittany's hands, and much to her own pleasure (she's sure she'll use the image later) she managed to get a string of cum on Brittany's breasts.

Then the shame set in. She'd lasted what? Less than ten minutes? At least it wasn't like two strokes and then she popped off but still. She's trying to think of a way to tell Brittany that she swears she can make it last longer, than she was just really excited, and it's been a while, but she was saved from that awkward explanation.

Brittany leaned down so she was lying on top of Santana, cum and all. She had never seen anything so sexy in her life. Santana's face as she came, the way she looked at her directly after. "You are so sexy." She purred into the Latina's ear, kissing her there and taking her ear lobe in between her teeth. "So sexy Santana"

Santana liked the way her name sounded when Brittany said it like that. "Please kiss me" the Latina replied. It sounded a little more needy than she had intended, and she was definitely not thinking about her first time when the girl just got up and left. Or she was trying not to anyway. But of course Brittany wasn't that girl, and she definitely wasn't going to leave. She kissed Santana deeply. Trying to convey everything she felt. Which was a lot. She felt sexy, and she felt proud that she'd been able to do that to Santana, she felt amazing when Santana looked at her the way she did. She felt more than ok, she didn't know that she'd ever feel even just ok after any kind of sexual activity. She felt happy. She felt grateful. She felt comfortable.

She felt really wet.

Santana wanted to make Brittany feel good. She didn't really know anything about foreplay other than what she saw in porn, which she assumed wasn't super reliable. She desperately wanted to try. In order to do that properly, she wanted Brittany on her back. She wasn't going to flip Brittany like they do in cheesy romance movies. She thought if she tried, she might end up giving them both concussions by accidentally smacking their heads together, or accidentally flinging them both to the floor in her excitement. Plus, doing that didn't give Brittany the opportunity to say she didn't want to do that. She didn't want to force Brittany into anything. She thought maybe she should just be honest. She looked up into Brittany's eyes.

"Can I-" She swallowed hard, trying to swallow her nervousness. "Can I touch you?"

Brittany nodded demurely and Santana leaned up to kiss her, using her hand to gently guide Brittany by the shoulder to lie down on her back. Santana thought she looked nervous. Which Brittany, in truth, totally was. She knew that what was about to happen would be about her. Sex had never been about her. She didn't know how her body would react. She did know that she had never had an orgasm.

"Are you sure this is ok? We can stop if you're not ready." Brittany shook her head no. She was ready. She wanted Santana to touch her, the amount of sticky moisture she could feel was proof of that. Santana nodded and started to slide Brittany's shorts and underwear down. Brittany sighed when her over heated center was exposed to the much cooler air. She bit her lip nervously when Santana looked down at what she had just uncovered.

"Brittany you're beautiful. All of you. You're just….you have all over beauty." She rambled before cutting herself off by kissing Brittany. Brittany reached her arms up and pulled Santana tightly to her, feeling the comfort Santana's presence provided. She released her tight hold, and Santana parted their lips.

She ran her hand down Brittany's body, trying to go slow, but barely masking her enthusiasm. When she reached Brittany's belly button she veered off to the side to run her fingers down along the crease at her hip. Brittany's breathing was uneven, and Santana took that as a good sign. Before she went any further, she looked into Brittany's eyes once more, as if to ask for approval. Brittany nodded, and Santana ran her finger, very lightly, along her center. So light that she didn't even part her lips, a ghost of a motion. But Brittany felt it and bit her lip. She wanted Santana to touch her harder.

Santana ran her finger along the same path a second time, this time parting her slightly and smiling at the wetness she found there. She continued to run her finger gently up and down, occasionally dipping further. Then, with as much care as she could, Santana tried circling Brittany's clit, or what she thought her clit might be. The reaction was instant. Brittany bucked into her hand and reached out to clutch the Latina's shoulder.

Feeling braver, she ran her finger back down through her wetness, and entered Brittany just up to her first knuckle. She wasn't trying to tease Brittany. She just wanted to be gentle. She wanted to make sure that Brittany didn't have to tell her to slow down, or that she'd gone to far, because she wanted to make sure it never got to that point.

Brittany pulled Santana tightly into her again, whispering "More" against her lips as she attacked them with several small kisses. Santana sunk her entire finger in, Brittany's responding moan was encouraging. She started to move in and out a little faster, and just a little harder. She slowly slid her thumb up and started to gently circle Brittany's clit again. She developed a rhythm that Brittany was responding well too. She leaned down and circled one of her nipples with her tongue, adding to the blonde's pleasure. Brittany moaned her name.

Santana continued this rhythm, occasionally just fingering her, or just rubbing her clit. It felt amazing. After several minutes though, it felt like she was stuck. Like this ball of tension was stuck in her lower stomach and it was a frustrating feeling. She started to think to much and suddenly felt bad that Santana had been doing it for so long, she didn't want that Latina to get tired or sore or bored. Escpecially not bored. Because she was doing an amazing job. Brittany briefly considered faking it, but she didn't really know how to fake an orgasm since she hadn't had one, and had seen a few fake ones in movies but was sure that wasn't how it worked. So reached her hand down, and stilled the Latina's hand, pulled her finger out of her, and brought it up and laid it on her chest. She was breathing heavily, and felt empty at the loss of Santana's hand.

"Did you –um did you, you know. Cum?" Santana asked nervously. She was pretty sure Brittany hadn't. Unless nothing happened when girls with vaginas came. But she thought she'd probably at least be able to tell. Brittany shook her head no.

"Why did you stop me then?" Santana really didn't want to stop. She wanted to do it for hours. For days. Pretty much forever if Brittany would have let her.

"I'm not going to orgasm. I don't know how, I think my body is broken or something." Brittany tried to explain. "But it felt amazing. So amazing Santana." She said sincerely to the Latina. Santana felt like she was telling the truth, but still didn't really understand why Brittany had stopped her. She felt ashamed, like she couldn't perform well enough to make Brittany come. And she felt worried that Brittany had been uncomfortable. But Brittany just pulled her up so that she'd lie next to her, both on their sides, and laid her palm on the Latina's cheek.

"This was the most amazing night. I just made it to…whatever base we made it to with my incredibly sexy girlfriend." Brittany said and kissed Santana's forehead. Santana's heart sped up at the world girlfriend being said out loud. She repeated it in a reverent whisper. Brittany nodded and then kissed her deeply. When they parted Santana had a slightly uncomfortable thought.

"We should maybe clean up. I kind of…you know, all over both of us." Brittany giggled, and then nodded. "You can go first if you'd like." Brittany nodded, and got up. Santana felt a slight stirring while watching Brittany's very naked, very lithe body stand up. "Uh…you could wrap a blanket around yourself. Don't forget the flashlight" She handed Brittany the now very wrinkled sheet and pointed to the flashlight. After Brittany got back, Santana quickly ran and peed and wiped herself down. When she came back Brittany was sorting out her pajamas. Her heart fell. She'd been kind of excited to sleep with Brittany with all of their skin touching.

She picked up her shorts and threw them on and then went to throw her shirt on when she heard Brittany ask in a small voice "could we maybe just sleep like this?" Santana turned, still halfway through the motion of pulling her shirt overhead and saw Brittany standing there in just her underwear. "I just..I kind of want to feel you. It would, I just think it would feel really nice. And safe maybe." Embarrassed that she'd said safe, because it wasn't Santana's job to make her feel that way she continued. "Or clothes are fine, if you want. I just need to find my tank top."

"No B. This way is fine." She dropped her shirt and gently hugged Brittany. Their naked torsos pressing together tightly. She knew what Brittany meant by safe. Not that she felt unsafe, but that being naked with Santana made her feel safe in her vulnerability. She knew that Brittany knew she'd never take advantage of her. The thought made her heart swell with pride and understanding. She felt safe too. "Climb in bed and get under the covers, I'm going to blow the candles out. Will you be ok in the dark? Still no power." Brittany nodded.

"If you get in right after, I think I'll be ok." She responds as she climbs into the bed, waiting to pull the covers up until Santana got in. Santana blew out all the candles. She glanced out the window, it was still pouring and the wind was blowing really hard. She noticed that she hadn't heard any thunder since they'd started, but now it was back. She thought maybe she had just had better things to focus on. A particularly loud clap of thunder made Brittany squeak and Santana rushed to get into the bed.

In an uncharacteristically fluid movement on Santana's part, she slid into the bed, and pulled Brittany into her arms, both lying on their sides. "Everything is ok baby. I've got you." She kissed the top of Brittany's head. When Brittany calmed down she noticed that her face was pressed into Santana's cleavage. She smiled.

"I really love your boobs. Really, all of you you're my new favorite thing to look at." Santana laughed.

"I feel the same way about you." The Latina responded, pulling Brittany in tighter. Somewhere between lazy kisses and readjustments to their position to get just a little closer, the both fell asleep.

Sometime not long after they'd both fallen asleep, Santana feels Brittany shift quickly in her arms, and it wakes her up. Brittany wasn't awake though, as Santana had suspected, her eyes were still tight but moving rapidly, and her breathing was shallow. She had a scared expression on her face and was whimpering lightly. The Latina wasn't sure if it was discomfort from the storm that was still raging outside, or a nightmare, but she thought maybe she should wake her either way. "Brittany" she whispered. "Brittany wake up you're having a bad dream." Brittany didn't wake, so she said a little louder "Baby wake up". Brittany's eyes shot open.

"Wha?" She mumbled out.

"You were having a bad dream." Brittany was partially sitting up now, glancing rapidly around the room. "Brit come here." She pulled Brittany into her and noticed that Brittany was shaking. She ran her hand up and down her back in an attempt to sooth her.

"I'm sorry." Brittany mumbled. Santana looked to Brittany's face and noticed tears in her eyes. "I didn't mean to wake you."

Santana shook her head. "You can always wake me. I'm not upset B. What's wrong? Do you remember then nightmare?" Brittany nodded her head. "Do you want to talk about it?"

Brittany didn't want to taint their wonderful evening but she wasn't really sure she'd be able to fall back asleep right away. She never usually could. But maybe talking about it would help. She nodded her head. "It wasn't really a dream. Kind of a memory. One night my ex showed up at my house and he wanted to do stuff. But I told him I couldn't because I'd forgotten to take my pill. Which I hadn't forgotten. I just didn't want to do anything and I thought that might stop him. And he yelled at me and told me that there was a reason I was on the pill, and it was because he hated condoms. And that I was an idiot. I told him that I had been busy because of school, and I'd just forgotten, that he didn't need to be so mean." She took a deep breath. The fact that Santana was holding her so tightly she couldn't inflate her lungs all the way was not lost on her.

"So then he hit me and made me bite my tongue really hard and it bleed. Then he told me I was of no use to him, and left. That was the memory. In my dream, the only difference was we were standing in a field. And I was only in my underwear." Brittany's breath shook with the effort she was putting forth not to break down.

Santana couldn't hold back her tears. She remained silent for a few moments trying to make the crying stop. It wasn't her story. She didn't need to cry. But she couldn't help it. She cared so deeply for Brittany the idea that she hadn't been there to protect her, even though she didn't know her, hurt. The idea that there was a reason to protect her in the first place hurt. If she ever saw him, she was sure she'd rip his dick off. She was positive. Tears continued leaking down her eyes now in anger and sorrow. She kept her breathing even, and held Brittany to her as tight as she could.

"San?" No response. "I'm sorry I shouldn't have told you that. That's my business. I'm sorry." Santana gently shushed her.

"First" She said as evenly as she could "I want to know. I want you to tell me everything. No matter how I react. No matter how mad you think it might make me, or sad, I want to know. I want to know your past. I want you to feel better by being able to say it out loud." She took a deep shuddering breath. The tears falling faster now. She could not keep the tears out of her voice any more. "Second and most important-"Brittany looked up, her own tears falling now too. "I will never, ever hurt you. Ever. And I will remind you of that every single day until forever if I need to, and it's ok if you forget because anyone with your past might. But I will never ever hurt you B. Ever." Her sob broke loose on the last ever. And Brittany reached her neck up and kissed her. Their tears mixing together as they cried and kissed.

Eventually the tears stopped, and the kisses slowed. Brittany felt like she had a response stuck in her throat. Something she desperately wanted to say, and was positive she felt for real, but thought it was too early to say. She didn't want to scare Santana. Plus, she was kind of scared that she felt so strongly so quickly. So she settled for a different response. "I am the luckiest girl alive, my girlfriend is perfect." Santana laughed lightly, having the same internal debate as Brittany and also opting to not say it out loud. Because Brittany might think she was crazy for feeling so much so soon and she didn't want to lose her.

"My girlfriend is perfect too. Maybe they should meet." She laughed at her own joke a little. And then after a pause, "Hey Britt, can I ask you a question?" Brittany heard the hesitancy in her voice, but nodded yes anyway. "Did your parents know you were on birth control? Were you really on it just because of him?"

Brittany nodded again. "Yeah. When I told my mom I was seeing him, she put me on birth control. Then I decided I didn't like it. And I kept forgetting it. It made me kind of sick too. I lost my appetite. When I told Tommy that I thought I was going to stop taking it he got angry. He said I could probably do without a few meals, and that I wouldn't be going off of the birth control because he didn't like condoms. This was before I had completely given up on the idea that maybe he wasn't supposed to be treating me this way and I told my mom. She said most men hate condoms, and that I should be smart and responsible enough to remember a pill everyday." Santana could feel her blood pressure going up. Scratch the dick removal, she was just going to kill him. She could feel all of Brittany's bones. Not in a sickly skinny way, but she was very thin, and she never stopped dancing.

"After he hit me because I kept forgetting to take the pill, even though I hadn't that time, my mom saw the bruise. She asked what happened, I told her I forgot my pill. So she took me to the doctor, and got me the once a year shot. I didn't feel as sick. Which is nice. And my periods are really regular which is good for dance. But I read some of the side effects. I'm not as stupid as she thinks I am. One of the side effects is infertility. I really want kids someday Santana. And I'd be ok with adoption, I'd love them all the same, but knowing I can't have them because of him, or her makes me so angry. I told her. I told her I read the pamphlet. And I could be infertile. She told me to stop being over dramatic, and that it probably would be no loss to society if I didn't procreate." Brittany started to cry lightly again. Santana just held her close and listened. Who the fuck were these people? How did someone so perfect end up in their presence? Brittany was probably the only good thing that ever came from them.

"I would be a good mom I think. I think she's wrong."

"She's definitely wrong B. She's…I don't have words to describe her, not ones that I'm willing to say anyway. Do you still care about her?"

"I think so. She's my mom. I can't just not care about her. I just never really understood why they loved my sister so much and not me. I used to be sure it's because I'm stupid. Sometimes I think she cared. I think she got me the shot because she didn't want me to get hit anymore. And even after she told me it'd be good if I didn't have kids, when I found a better birth control option, she helped me get it. So now I have this little thing in my arm that will keep me from getting pregnant for a few years." While Santana knew this was just part of the story she was telling her, she couldn't help but feel like the undertone of the end of Brittany's last statement was 'don't worry, I'm still on birth control'."

"If you don't like that thing in your arm, or it makes you sick or anything… I want you to get it taken out if you want to. Ever. I will use condoms. When we get there. And we could take forever getting there if you wanted or needed. I don't want you to feel like you ever need to do anything to yourself to accommodate me. We are in a relationship. That means I take care of you, and you take care of me, and we compromise when we need to. But your body is not a compromise. It's your body. So if you don't want to be on any form of birth control, that's ok. We'll use condoms. Ok?"

Brittany nodded. Part of her wished she had always known Santana. That they had met in a sand box when they were five, and they played house, and got pretend married, and were girlfriends their whole lives. But then she wouldn't be who she was, and Santana wouldn't be who she was. And she might even take Santana for granted, which she knows that she could never do now. Not after she had been through what she had.

"Thank you for saying that. I feel like I don't deserve how wonderful you are. I think I'll stay on the birth control for now because I like the regularity. And I don't think I feel any negative side effects. But if I ever feel like I want to, I promise I will."

"Good. And you're pretty amazing yourself B." She tugged Brittany tighter to her, even though she was sure they were already as close as possible. Soon she felt Brittany's breathing even out, and drifted off to sleep herself.

The next time they woke, it was to Santana's cell phone alarm. She shut it off, and glanced at the battery, not much charge left. She had plugged it in last night hoping if the power came back on that it would charge. Apparently there was still no power. She felt Brittany start to trace patterns onto her stomach, it felt amazing. She knew they should probably get up, but she was having a really hard time making herself do that. She looked at Brittany, who's eyes were still closed but was now circling her finger around Santana's belly button at an irregular pace. Santana figured she was still coming in and out of sleep. She checked her email on the off chance that the professor, who never canceled class, did cancel it.

No email from him, but even better, campus still had no power, so it was closed for the day. No classes. No meetings. No rehearsals. She smiled and did a tiny celebratory dance. They got to start the weekend early. "Brit, you can go back to sleep. Campus is closed, no classes." Brittany murmured something and Santana took that has confirmation that she'd heard. She turned back onto her side, kissing Brittany's forehead. She lay awake for a little bit watching Brittany sleep and thinking that there's no way else she'd rather wake up. After a few minutes, she too fell back asleep.

The third time she woke, it was to kisses. Which is a very agreeable way to wake up. A very bouncy, mostly naked Brittany kissing all over her face was wonderful. She cracked one eye and caught Brittany smiling at her. "Morning baby." Her voice was gravely with sleep. She cleared her throat. "What time is it?"

"Eleven. I can't remember the last time I slept this late. But now I'm wide-awake. What do you want to do? Do you want me to let you go back to sleep? Or… I don't want to over stay my welcome do you want me to go home? I can. I don't want to. But I can. Or we…" Santana leaned up and kissed her effectively cutting off her hyper rambling. Who was this awake when they first woke up? If it was anyone else she'd by annoyed, but it's Brittany so it's just cute and endearing.

"You're always welcome, over staying is not even a possibility that's how much I want you with me. And we can do anything you want. We should eat something. Then do you want to go see the ducks?" Brittany squealed and flattened herself down onto Santana in what she assumed was a hug. Santana just laughed.

"YES! But I need to shower."

"Me too."

"I don't have any clothes here." Santana wondered how soon was to soon for her to suggest Brittany leave some stuff here. The way she was feeling right now she wished Brittany would just move in all together. She shook the thought from her mind.

"How about I shower here and get dressed. Then we can eat something, and then go to your dorm and you can shower and get dressed." Brittany nodded and rolled off of Santana, grabbing the Latina's phone as she did. Santana was amazed at the girl's coordination.

"You shower. I'll play Fruit Ninja." Santana smiled and got out of bed after kissing Brittany once more. She walked over to her dresser to get something to wear out, she looked back to the bed and noticed Brittany was laying on her side, head propped up on one arm, staring at her. Santana was suddenly very aware that she was indeed naked except her shorts. Brittany licked her lips. Santana's eyes got really wide.

"What? My girlfriend is really really hot." Santana blushed and tried to distract herself from the fact that Brittany was also completely exposed. She managed to not dissolve into any embarrassing boner situations, and made it to the shower. When she got out Brittany was sitting cross-legged on the bed in just the hoodie that Santana had given her, and her underwear. Santana liked this look very much.

Brittany jumped up and hugged the now clothed, clean, and makeuped Latina. "I look so sloppy next to you." She pouted, not completely seriously.

"Well this look is one of my favorites on you so don't call my girlfriend sloppy." She kissed Brittany, who just smiled and rocked back and forth on her feet. Then she saw her shorts and put those on.

"Oh, I left a present in your pictures on your phone." Santana was confused as to what that meant, but Brittany had just walked out of her bedroom so she picked up her phone and checked her photo album. Her jaw dropped ands he thanked whomever invented them for her compression shorts because what she saw definitely made her dick stir. It was a picture of Brittany, still just in her tiny underwear, with her arm draped across her chest only partially obscuring the view of her breasts. There was even visible nipple. Santana said a silent thanks to whoever was listening and made sure that was saved to both the phone memory, and her back up.

She walked out to the kitchen where she heard Brittany humming. She wrapped her arms around her and kissed the back of Brittany's neck. "I loved the present. A lot." Brittany just continued to hum.

"Good. I'm making us toast, caus we kind of can't use anything in the fridge. So peanut butter banana toast a la Brittany. Sound ok?"

"Perfect." She sat on the counter while Brittany finished the toast. They ate and then Brittany put her sweats back on and they went out to the car. Santana got a sudden idea. "Hey B. I'm just going to drop you off at your dorm, I need to run an errand." Brittany pouted only slightly but after Santana told her she would be outside waiting before Brittany could even finish getting ready, Brittany nodded and was all smiles again.

After dropping Brittany off she drove to the closest store, hoping they still had what she needed but thinking they were probably all sold out. She was really glad Brittany came over last night, obviously, but she wanted to do something that might alleviate some of the anxiety she had felt, just in case they were ever in a position where Santana couldn't come get her right away. Thankfully the store still had some of what she was looking for. She purchased it all, plus a loaf of bread, and went back to her car and drove to Brittany's dorm parking lot where she colored and wrote stuff on the box she planned to put it all in.

She kept an eye on the weather while she worked. It wasn't ideal weather for duck feeding she thought, but the rain was holding off for now, and it was mostly just windy. The storms were due to come back but it looked like they might have a few hours. She finished her project and a few short minutes later Brittany appeared at the door. Santana smiled, Brittany hadn't called her because she wanted to make sure Santana really was there.

Brittany saw Santana's car and ran over to it and jumped into the seat. She felt much better after her shower. "Errands all done babe?" She asked as she leaned over to kiss Santana.

"Mhmm. Got you something, for just in case. Because I hope if the power goes out again you'll call me and we can spend it together, but in the off chance I'm ever not there or can't get to you right away…I wanted you to have something that might help." She ducked her head momentarily feeling a little lame. But handing Brittany the box from the back seat anyway.

Brittany read the top, in bright colors it said 'Brittany's emergency no power kit" with flowers and rainbows all over it. She smiled and opened the lid. Inside she found a few LED candles, a flashlight, an LED book light, some crayons and markers, a coloring book, and a stuffed dog. She looked up at Santana. She'd never received a gift like this ever. It was the most amazing thing.

Santana wondered briefly if Brittany liked it. But quickly knew she did when the biggest smile she'd ever seen broke out across Brittany's face and she literally launched herself across the seat into Santana's lap leaving little wet kisses all over her face. Santana started to giggle. "I'm glad you like it B." After a brief make out session, Brittany crawled back into her seat. "Alright. Let's go find you some ducks."

They drove off towards a park where Santana had always seen ducks. She was pretty sure they didn't even fly south for the winter so it would be their best bet for locating some she thought. The silence in the car was comfortable. Their hands playing together. "Hey B. Can I tell my brothers about us?"

"You can tell everyone you want! Only…I know they are your friends but could we tell Quinn, Mercedes, Kurt, and Sam together?"

"They are your friends too babe. And absolutely. Want me to text them and set up a group dinner somewhere a little ways out of town? Since no one has power and we have to eat anyway. And I kind of want to tell them as soon as possible." Brittany nodded, liking the idea. They pulled into the parking lot and Santana typed out the two texts she wanted to send. A group one to her brothers. "I GOTS ME A GIRLFRIEND!" (She had kind of already told her brothers about Brittany so she was sure they were expecting it. But just to show off, she sent along the picture Brittany had sent her of her in her hoodie) and one to their friends "hey guys. Group dinner closest place with power tonight?" She pocketed her phone and glanced over at a very excited Brittany.

"Can we go now?" Brittany asked. Santana nodded and grabbed the bread and her camera out of the back seat. They went down to the pond and sure enough, there were ducks there. Santana had to remind Brittany to stay quiet to not scare them away. They started off throwing chunks of bread into the water and grass and the ducks would eat them. Brittany would jump up and down, clapping her hands, and would throw more. Santana noticed that the ducks didn't seem at all phased by their presence and would get really close if Brittany accidently dropped the bread instead of throw it.

"Hey B. I want to try something. I need you to sit down on this bag so your butt doesn't get wet. And hold your hand out with this bread and stay super quiet and still." Brittany did as she was told. She was pretty sure that the duck wouldn't come near her but she'd try if Santana wanted her to. After she sat down, Santana tore of some tiny chunks of bread and started throwing them towards the ducks, getting them progressively closer to Brittany. Most of them ran off, but one brave one kept going closer and closer until he leaned out and started to nibble the bread in her hand. The smile that broke across her face would put any sunrise to shame. She quickly got out her camera and took a few pictures until Brittany had to release the bread because the duck was getting to close to her fingers.

Brittany turned to look at Santana as if that was the most amazing thing that had ever happened to her. Santana realized with a pang of sadness that there weren't many people doing nice things for Brittany. She pushed the sadness down though, and decided she'd make up for the rest of the world. She would treat Brittany they way she should have always been treated.

Brittany leapt up with a squeal, effectively scaring the shit out of the duck that was still close by, and jumped into Santana's arms wrapping her legs around her waist. Santana was thankful that she was pretty strong and Brittany was pretty light. How embarrassing would it have been to drop her? But she didn't. And Brittany kissed her fully. "Did you see that?" She said excitedly.

"Mhmm. Even got some pictures." Brittany laughed and kissed her about a million more times. She released the hold her legs had around Santana's waist and lowered herself so she was standing again.

"You're the best thing that's ever happened to me." Brittany said with complete sincerity. And Santana knew that unfortunately for Brittany's entire life up to this point, that might be true. But Brittany was the best thing that happened to her too. And she told her such. Santana may have led a good life, but it was a pretty hollow one. She was bitter, and angry at whoever made her the way she was. And she was tired of living the constant struggle of logically accepting who she was and what she had, but emotionally irrationally hating herself for it. Brittany managed to make that go away with her complete and gentle acceptance.

It started to drizzle again so after a few more chunks of bread thrown at the now slightly traumatized ducks, they walked back to the car. When they got there Santana took out her phone. The first few messages were replies from their friends saying they definitely wanted to leave town and get some food. Santana texted them back with a meeting time of seven at her apartment, and they'd figure out where to go from there.

The next few messages were from her brothers, and they made her swallow loudly.

"Dinner plans good?" Brittany asked, Santana nodded. She was excited to tell their friends, but Santana looked suddenly nervous. "What's wrong? Your brothers not ok with you and I together?" Santana shook her head no.

"Uh no. Kind of the opposite. Well the thing is, they're a lot to handle. Like, a lot. They're protective and uh kind of weird. And well, they want to meet you." Brittany nodded. Ok. She could do that. If they were anything like Santana she was sure they'd be great. Plus it wasn't like she'd have to meet them all at once. "All at once." Santana then said. Brittany nodded again. OK. She can do this. That was going to be nerve wracking, four of them at once but at least she'd have probably till Christmas break because when else would they have time? There would be time to prepare. "And they're going to come up next weekend." Brittany and Santana turned to face each other with nervous smiles.

Next weekend would be interest. Hell, tonight would be interesting. But, Santana thought as she looked over at Brittany again, totally fucking worth it.


	7. Chapter 7

**AN:** Sorry it took so long readers. I had some serious writers block coupled with some work stuff. All is well. Here it is. Important conversations are had. I made myself laugh once or twice so I hope you laugh once or twice. I hope the two big conversations feel kind of awkward because they should. And I hope you generally enjoy it.

I have some more exciting (read: smutty) things for next chapter. I also think I'm going to maybe find a person(s) to talk through the life of this story with because I'm a little worried about getting stuck again. So. Know that I'm committed as long as you are. Enjoy. Review. Message me. Tell me what you like or hell, random facts about yourself. Whatever.

* * *

Santana is worried that this whole meeting the family so soon thing is going to throw Brittany. She doesn't want her to be nervous because honestly her brothers are going to love the blonde. She knows that. She also knows that Brittany doesn't seem to have the best familial interactions. She's just hoping that this doesn't stress Brittany out in any way. Just as she's thinking of words to say to comfort Brittany (even though she's not totally sure Brittany is actually uncomfortable) her phone goes off. She checks, it's an email. She opens the email and it's from the university.

"This is an email from the university emergency notification system. Please do not respond blah blah blah. The power is not due to be restored on campus until Saturday afternoon at the earliest, but possibly not till Sunday. The surrounding area can expect the same time frames." She doesn't know whether or not to be excited or annoyed. It's kind of cool, black outs. You have an excuse to not do homework, and she remembers her brothers trying to make them more fun when she was little. But then she looks over at Brittany.

If she wasn't anxious before, she is now. She hates the power outage. Something pretty amazing came from it last night but multiple days? That's… what will she do tonight? She has the awesome kit Santana made for her, but she's still anxious. She can feel the anxiety continuing to build the more that she thinks about it.

"Do you maybe want to stay over again tonight? Or I could stay at yours? Just so you're not alone or you have a roommate so you won't be alone I guess but if you'd like, whatever you want-"

"Can I please stay with you?" Brittany blurts out. The second Santana suggested it her anxiety began to ebb. Santana's eyes brighten. Brittany is glad and surprised but mostly just glad that Santana seems to want to spend as much time with her as she does the Latina.

"Absolutely B. We've got a few hours till we all meet for dinner. Anything you want to do?" Brittany thinks about it. She vaguely remembers Rachel saying that she was going home for the weekend. She wonders if she cleaned their fridge out before she left. Gross.

"I should maybe go back to my room for a bit and clean out the fridge. I'm sure everything is bad, or will be. And then I can grab some clothes and change for dinner. Oh and I have some games I could get and we could play them tomorrow if you want?" The idea of playing games in their pajamas excites Brittany. It's something she would have never done in her previous relationships but it's one of those things that always seemed like it could be great. Lazy mornings playing games.

"Ohhhh yeah gross fridges. I should probably check ours too. How about I drop you off, you get your stuff sorted out and then text me when you're done so I can pick you up before it gets dark again." Brittany got slightly distracted from what Santana had been saying because she was watching her lips move. They were just so pretty and she desperately wanted to kiss them. So she did. Santana is her girlfriend, random kissing is one of the perks she thinks to herself.

"Sounds good." She says as she pulls away leaving a slightly surprised but smiling Santana. The Latina blinks a few times and takes a second to recover before quickly turning her head and facing the steering wheel.

"Ok. Let's go." Brittany chuckles at Santana's stunned response. Santana drops Brittany off at her dorm and decides she has a couple of hours before she'll go back to pick up Brittany. She decides to drive around for a minute and survey the damage. There are a lot of trees down, and it unsettles her a little bit to think about how something invisible could push over something as solid as a big tree. But she's kind of glad it did, in a way, because if it hadn't she might not have seen Brittany again last night. And then they might not be girlfriends right now. And they wouldn't have done what they did last night.

She thought about how amazing it had felt. Physically for sure. But also it felt good in other ways. It felt good to know Brittany wanted to be touching her. It felt good to be totally accepted. It felt really good holding Brittany in her arms. Then she thought about how Brittany had stopped her before she came. She hadn't been touching the blonde for very long, could Brittany really not be able to orgasm? Like, does that happen? She turned towards home.

She pulled into the parking lot and put the car into park but left the car running and her phone on the charger so she could use the internet on her phone. She looked up "how long does it take a girl to orgasm?". She was overwhelmed by the results. So she thought she'd be more direct "how to make a girl orgasm?". That was even worse, and pretty much just porn. So she decided that maybe she'd go right to the source. Quinn has a vagina. And Santana knew she could talk to Quinn about everything, surely that included this.

She got out of the car and went inside. She heard Quinn humming in the kitchen. When Santana got into the kitchen she saw her cleaning out the fridge. "Hey I just came back to do that." Quinn turned around and offered her a smile as if to say 'thanks, but I've got it.'. "Hey Q. This is kind of embarrassing but could I maybe ask you for advice?"

Normally Quinn would have made fun of Santana, even if it was in a totally joking manner, but the vulnerability in her voice made Quinn feel like maybe this was important. "Is this about Brittany?"

"Yeah."

"Want to know how to ask her how to be your girlfriend?" Quinn smiled gently at her.

"No, I kind of…accidently on purpose did that already. But don't tell her I told you, she wanted to tell everyone together at dinner." Quinn raised an eyebrow in confusion but nodded.

"Ok. Well what is it then?"

"Have you ever uh had like uh an orgasm?" Santana ducked her head and Quinn coughed in surprise.

"What the hell? Where is this going?"

"Last night Brittany and I did stuff. And it was awesome. But then I" she took a deep breath. She might as well be as adult about this as possible. "then I fingered her and she didn't orgasm. So I was wondering if you had. Because I have some questions."

"Um. Congratulations first of all I think. Second sure I have. But I'm not totally sure what that has to do with Brittany."

"How long did it take you?"

"It's different for everyone San. How long were you… uh..touching her?" Quinn was blushing heavily.

"Less than ten minutes for sure."

"And you just stopped? Dumb ass it takes way longer than that usually." Quinn smacked her on the arm.

"No I didn't want to stop! Jesus Q!" She rubbed her upper arm where Quinn had smacked her. "She stopped me. She said she couldn't orgasm, and that she was broken." Santana divulged the last part of that with some hesitation. She knew everything Brittany had told Santana had been in secret. But she knew Quinn would never say anything and she didn't have anyone to talk to about this stuff.

"I thought you said she had a boyfriend before? Did they not ever sleep together?" Santana could feel her blood boiling.

"I guess he slept with her would be the better way to put it. Or, whatever. It's not my story to tell. But just know that he never cared about her and that he literally fucking used her as a sexual object Quinn. Just a fucking receptacle. She thinks he broke her." She clapped her hand over her mouth. She didn't mean to blow up like that. She hadn't meant to say any of that. But she was so angry that Brittany was still dealing with, maybe always would still deal with, the shitty lasting effects of that relationship.

Quinn gently took her forearm and pulled her hand away from her mouth. She had had no idea that Brittany had gone through any of that. She doesn't know her well, but she does know the dancer is incredibly sweet and clearly cares about Santana. Plus nobody should be treated that way. "It's ok San. It's between us. I will never tell her you told me anything. Ok so here's what I can tell you. Every single girl is different. Vaginas aren't universal, just like the girls they are attached to. Ok?" Santana nods, still mad at herself for telling Quinn what she had. "If Brittany thinks she's broken, it's probably just because nobody ever cared enough to show her how she worked. And she never had a positive enough view of sex to want to figure out how it worked, until now. But she's probably nervous, even if she is comfortable with you. So maybe that's what you need to do, get rid of the nerves."

"But how? I mean we had candles last time."

Quinn shakes her head and lets out an amused groan. "Candles are great San. But I mean…maybe talk about it? Tell her you like doing it, and as long as it still feels good, you'd like to keep going. That if you get tired, or want to stop, you promise you will. That way she will be less inclined to stop you. If she does, that's ok. She's allowed to be nervous. Sounds like nobody has ever used sexual activities as a way to show her that they care about her. And that's sad. So you need to make sure she gets it. Ok?" Quinn is blushing up to her hairline. She's never had this kind of conversation before. But it helps that Santana is nodding at her and taking in every word like she wishes she could be taking notes.

"Thanks Q. I'm sorry we had to talk about that. If you ever need to know anything about penis's I could try and help." Quinn laughs and turns around to face the fridge again.

"So girlfriends huh?" She asks without turning around. A smile breaks out across Santana's face that Quinn can't see, but she can hear in her voice.

"Yeah. It's pretty amazing. She's amazing Q. It's like I'm scared because I like her so much and I haven't known her that long, but the fear is only in the logic part of my brain. Emotionally, I feel more comfortable with her and with these feelings than I've ever felt in my entire life." She kicks her feet a little and bites her bottom lip.

The idea makes Quinn a little sad even though she knows it shouldn't. She wishes that she could have done more to make Santana feel comfortable. She knows Santana knows that she loves her. And she's been the best friend that she could. Santana has certainly been the best friend anyone could be for her. But Quinn gets why that might not be enough sometimes. "I'm really happy to hear that S. And I am sorry about yesterday, I really didn't mean to upset her."

"Oh yeah. I guess I'm supposed to be upset about that. Oh well. Don't do it again or I'll kick your ass. That's my girlfriend you know." She can barely contain her excitement at the words, and all threat is totally lost. She knows that and is very ok with the idea.

"Yeah yeah I promise." Quinn rolls her eyes throwing the last of the fridge and freezer contents away. She hears Santana's phone go off on the counter. "It's Brittany." She guesses.

Santana picks up her phone to check the text.

From Brittany: You're sure it's ok if I spend the night again? And I'm ready!

To Brittany: I'd be sad if you didn't stay. And I'm on my way. See you soon.

"It's cool if she sleeps here sometimes, right Q?" Quinn looks up from tying the garbage bag. She assumed this would come up.

"As long as she's respectful to our apartment, which I know she will be, and as long as I don't have to hear you two going at it, of course she can stay here." Quinn likes Brittany. She's easy to be around and she definitely makes Santana a calmer person. Santana hops off the counter and kisses Quinn's cheek.

"Thanks for everything Q." She says sincerely. And then turns on her heels in embarrassment of her own sincerity.

"Any time S. And take out some of this garbage." Santana huffs but grabs a few bags anyway and heads out to her car. When she gets to the parking lot it's starting to rain again. She texts Brittany to let her know she's outside, and gets as close to the door as possible. After just a few minutes she sees Brittany coming out of the front door and running down the steps toward her car. She opened the back seat and threw her stuff back there, and then jumped into the front seat. Squealing.

"The rain is cold!" Santana laughs as she quickly turns the heat on and then grabs Brittany's hands to help warm them. Brittany leans across the consol to kiss Santana, nipping her bottom lip playfully. Then she buries her face in Santana's neck. "You're warm." She kisses her there before pulling back. "I missed you."

"Missed you to B." She almost added 'and I always do' to the end of that, but didn't. She didn't want to scare Brittany with her feelings. Her feelings that were so big they nearly scared her.

Brittany wouldn't have been scared though. She wished she knew how to bring up the depth of her feelings to Santana. She didn't know how to approach it though. She also wasn't totally sure if it was ok to feel as much as she did so early. She had never had real feelings at all, she didn't think. Not for another person anyway. Not good feelings.

They drove back to Santana's apartment in a comfortable silence. Santana thinking about what her and Quinn had discussed, and Brittany thinking about how the others were going to take the news of their relationship. Probably pretty well, she assumed. She was worried about Quinn the most though, hoping that the other blonde's protective side wouldn't prevent her from being happy for them.

When they get back to the apartment, nobody has arrived yet and Quinn seems to be in her room. "Come lay with me for a minute till the others get here?" Santana asks, holding one of Brittany's hands. Brittany nods and Santana leads her back to her room where they both kick of their shoes and go to lay on the Latina's bed. Santana opens her arms up inviting Brittany into her arms. Brittany has other ideas though. She kneels over top of Santana and lowers herself until her lips are pressed against Santana's, her blonde hair surrounding them.

The kiss stayed like that, their lips just pressed together, for a brief moment before Santana turned her head slightly to deepen the kiss. Their lips started moving against each other's, as the kiss grew more heated. Santana brought her hand up to Brittany's cheek while the other went to her waist. When she felt Brittany's tongue trace her bottom lip begging to be allowed entrance, she parted her lips, half sighing half moaning as she felt the blondes tongue glide past her lips and gently stroke her own.

Brittany wasn't sure she meant for this to turn into a full-blown make out session. She can't say she's unhappy though. Santana tastes amazing. It's like mint and sugar and Santana and is definitely Brittany's favorite flavor. When she starts to feel the suddenly familiar sensation of arousal she slows down the kissing before pulling back from Santana and laying one more quick peck to her lips before opening her eyes and looking into big brown ones staring back at her. Santana couldn't help the smile that formed, she was happy. Really happy. A kind of happy that she thought she might never get to me.

Brittany smiled back and then leant down and nuzzled her nose against Santana's before scooting down and laying her head on her chest. Santana brought her hand up and started absently running her fingers through the blonde's hair noting how soft it was. Brittany ran her fingers along Santana's belt, feeling the texture of the leather. Her mind was racing. She wanted Santana to touch her. She knew that, she could feel it. But the idea of disappointing the Latina because her body didn't work right upset her. She let her fingers slip down to the small sliver of skin showing just above Santana's belt. She felt the brunette's breath catch. Brittany smiled.

"What are you thinking about B?"

"A lot of things. Can you get hard in these compression shorts?" Santana let out an awkward laugh and Brittany scrunched her eyebrows in confusion with herself. She's not totally sure where the question came from, even though she asked it.

"Yeah. I can. It's just really uncomfortable if I get completely hard. That's only happened once though, usually I can kind of stop it." But she doubts that's true with Brittany around. She could already feel herself starting to stiffen at the impromptu but extremely welcome make out session that had happened moments ago.

Brittany hummed in acknowledgement of Santana's answer. Santana thought that maybe this might be an ok time to bring up last night. "Hey B, why did you stop me last night when I was, you know, doing stuff to you?" She gets embarrassed halfway through and thinks that maybe she should have thought this conversation out a little better.

"I didn't want you to keep going and get tired or something, it was taking so long."

"It really wasn't though. I mean…ok so you've never had an orgasm right?" Brittany shook her head. She hadn't. She was pretty sure she couldn't.

"And you've only slept with to- that douche bag right? Have you ever tried to touch yourself?" Santana couldn't even stand the idea of saying his name out loud. She'd never even met him, and for both of their sakes she hoped that she never did, but knowing how much she hurt the woman in her arms made her hate even his name.

"Yeah. Just him. And you now. And…I guess I tried to touch myself a few times. I'd heard a lot about how good sex felt and I thought maybe he was just doing it wrong but it wasn't very good."

"Did you think about something that turns you on when you did it? Or like…I don't know what some porn or look at pictures or anything?" This conversation was awkward. But sex was important to a couple, Santana knew that. She also knew that Brittany needed to enjoy it because she refused to ever ever treat her like an object for her own pleasure, because that's what it would feel like to her if she knew Brittany wasn't as into it as she was.

"No. I just kind of did it. You know. Just uh stuck my hand down there and felt around." Santana laughed and Brittany hit her arm.

"Ok. So, I've talked about sex with Quinn in the past" Santana wasn't to happy with lying to Brittany but she didn't want to embarrass the blonde by telling her that she'd already discussed their sex lives, and in particular, Brittany's personal life with her best friend. "And I know that you felt like I was touching you for a long time but it wasn't long. It was less than ten minutes I'm pretty sure and Quinn says sometime it can take a while. Like it's not weird for it to take half an hour sometimes. And you seemed to enjoy what I was doing-"

"I did. I really did. It felt better than anything ever. And I'd never been that" she hesitates slightly "wet before. But I just don't want you to feel like you need to do that for me, for that long… I would feel bad."

Santana shook her head lightly and kissed the fingers of Brittany's hand that she'd been playing with. "That's silly babe. I would literally do it for hours if it kept feeling good for you. I really really really liked touching you. I was kind of sad that I had to stop." Brittany tucked her head further into Santana's chest.

The brunette wasn't sure if she'd upset her until she heard a shy "really?" from the blonde. Santana reached down with her hand and guided Brittany to look at her. She wanted to make sure she knew how serious she was.

"Yeah. Really. I want to try again, if you'd let me. And I'd like for maybe you to not stop me, until you don't want me to touch you any more." Brittany made a small gesture of protest and Santana cut her off. "And I promise to stop if I get tired or don't want to do it anymore. Obviously not right now, because we have to go soon. But maybe sometime soon?" Brittany bit her lip and thought about it for a minute. Here was a girl, whom she had way more feelings for than she thought possible for the amount of time that they'd known each other, who was asking for her permission to try and make her feel good. She nodded. Santana's eyes lit up.

"Yeah? Awesome." She sat up a bit and kissed Brittany lightly. When they parted Santana pulled Brittany back down to her chest and held her tightly. Excited for the opportunity, and nervous and hopeful that she'd be able to help Brittany get the same enjoyment out of sex, or sex related activities, as she did. She wished that she had a little more experience so she could be sure that she was doing it right but Brittany had seemed really into it for that brief time last night so she thought maybe she was doing pretty well.

Before she could get any further in her thoughts she heard a knock at her door. "Come in" she said knowing it was Quinn. She held Brittany to her letting her know that she didn't need to move just yet.

Quinn noted the position of the two girls, completely tangled up in each other and smiled. "Just wanted you to know everyone is here and hungry." She winked at Santana and then left and pulled the door shut. Brittany went to sit up but Santana pulled her back down so that she could kiss her once more before they got up. As Brittany was fixing her hair quickly in the mirror she started to feel nervous.

"They're going to be ok with this right?"

Santana came up behind her and put her arms around her waist resting her hands on Brittany's flat stomach. She kissed the juncture of her shoulder and neck while nodding.

"More than ok baby. Don't be nervous." Brittany turned in Santana's arms and put her own around the Latina's neck pulling her close in a tight hug. After a brief minute she pulled away.

"Ok I'm good. I just needed a stand up cuddle." Santana cocked her head in confusion. "You know..a hug. But with you I hold you closer than I do with any other hugs so it's like a stand up cuddle." Santana smiled and brushed a piece of hair back behind Brittany's ear and kissed her gently. Then she took her hand and left the room.

Just before they got to the living room she dropped Brittany's hand, she didn't want anyone asking before they were ready to make the announcement. She knew Brittany was nervous, but she was mostly just excited. She knew her friends would be happy for her. Plus she was excited to just be able to be as affectionate with Brittany as she wanted. When they got into the living room everyone was discussing where they wanted to eat. She was glad. She didn't care where they went she was just excited to get there.

They'd decided to go to some vaguely Italian place that none of them wanted to like but all kind of did. Except Brittany. She'd never been there. "This is your first time at Breadstix?" Mercedes asked as they drove there. She and Sam were in a car with her and Brittany. Quinn, Kurt, and Kurt's new 'friend' Blaine behind them. Brittany just shook her head. "Brittany, unlimited breadsticks!"

"Girl I know that's right." Santana cut in and reached back for a high five from Brittany. Santana loved the breadsticks, but she also really just wanted to take focus off of Brittany, who seemed to be growing more anxious by the minute. She knew it was unnecessary for the blonde to feel that way but had no idea how to assuage her fears other that just telling everyone. Which she planned to do as soon as they were seated because she missed Brittany's hand in hers.

They walked into the restaurant, glad that it wasn't more crowded than it was, and were seated right away. The waitress took their drink order and walked away. Santana looked over at Brittany who was playing with her hands under the table. Brittany didn't mean to be nervous. But she was. So nervous she couldn't force herself to be hungry or think about food event though she'd barely eaten today. She didn't think anyone here would be angry with them for starting a relationship. It was just hard, she kind of felt like they were her friends, and truth be told, they were the only ones she had. She hadn't made any friends in any of her classes, or in her major yet. The idea saddened her but the idea of any of the people at the table not liking her or not thinking she was good enough made her more sad.

Santana decided she'd end the blonde's anxiety. "Hey guys," She said out loud and everyone looked up from their menu. It was in that moment that she realized that, once again, she maybe should have thought this through before just going full steam ahead. But they were here now, so she'd just press forward. "I just, well, we just wanted to tell you all together that" she took a breath and took Brittany's hand under the table. She quickly glanced at the blonde, her eyes were wide but she looked hopeful. "we just wanted to say that we are officially uh together." Silence. "as in girlfriends." Silence.

"Oh. I just, am I the only one that assumed they already were?" Kurt said looking around. Everybody laughed.

"I'd say about time but it's only been like two weeks or something. But you guys fit, I thought so the first day. So yeah, about time." Sam smiled his big smile at them. And Brittany knew it'd be ok. She chanced a glance at Quinn, who she'd been most worried about upsetting and Quinn was smiling at her, and nodded when she caught her eye. It was ok. They were all still her friends. And Santana's hand was still in hers. This is good. She thought. This is excellent. And suddenly, she was starving.

After dinner they all drove back to Santana and Quinn's apartment and came inside. They pulled out a few bottles of wine that they had stashed away and started playing Apples to Apples by candle and lantern light. After hours of playing, and much laughter, everyone decided to leave. Santana got up and helped Brittany up before hugging her friends goodbye. Mercedes hugged her "this is my obligatory hurt her and I'll hurt you speech." Mercedes said to Brittany. Mercedes then promptly turned to Santana. "Same goes fro you. You hurt my Brittany, I will end your scrawny ass." Nobody had ever said that to Tommy. She didn't think she'd have anyone to say that to Santana. Not that she was worried about Santana hurting her but it was nice to know that Mercedes included her in her protectiveness.

Sam came over next and hugged Brittany lifting her off the ground. "I'm excited about you two." He then kissed her on the cheek.

"Yo trouty mouth! Get your guppy lips off my woman." Everyone laughed, Santana forced one too. She was only kind of serious. But really that cheek was hers to kiss.

Everyone left and Quinn went into her room while Brittany and Santana went to Santana's. Brittany was pulling her pajamas out of her bag when she remembered the talk that they had had earlier that evening. "Hey San. I know we talked earlier about doing stuff and…I want to but would it be ok for us to just cuddle tonight?" Before Santana even had a chance to respond Brittany started to back pedal, worried that she'd frustrated Santana in some way. "But we can do whatever you want, I was just, it was just, I just suggested it because-"

Santana pulled her into a hug. "I'd like to just cuddle tonight. I'm really tired and I've got this beautiful girlfriend that I'd really like to just hold. If that's ok with you?" Brittany nodded slowly. "And Brittany, please try to remember that we don't ever have to do something you don't want to." Brittany nodded again as a slow smile spread across her face.

"Get changed. I want to cuddle."

"That's more like it." Santana responded as she bent over to pick up a pair of shorts. Brittany smacked her butt before she grabbed her clothes and ran out of the room to the bathroom.

When Brittany got back into the bedroom Santana was already laying in bed clearly waiting for the blonde. She quickly crawled into her girlfriend's arms and wrapped a leg around her hip pulling them as close as she could. They shared a few lazy goodnight kisses before Santana quickly fell asleep. Brittany propped herself up on one elbow to watch the Latina sleep for a moment. She truly is the most beautiful girl I've ever seen, Brittany thought as she gently kissed the sleeping girl's mouth. She brushed some hair out of her face before lying back down. The sleeping Latina cuddled closer to Brittany, who smiled.

She laid there awake for a little while thinking about her conversation with Santana and she was genuinely curious because maybe she was wrong. Maybe her body worked ok when it was with Santana. What she had done had certainly felt good, and she decided she was excited to try again. After that her thoughts progressed to how well tonight had gone with telling the group about their relationship. She decides Santana was right and she had been silly to get so nervous. But then a thought hit her that she thought maybe she had a genuine need to be anxious about, she had to meet all of Santana's big brothers next week. And certainly they wouldn't be so easy going about her dating their baby sister. She decided that talking to Santana about that as opposed to just stressing all night. So she forced herself to listen to Santana's sleeping noises and even breathing, and it wasn't long at all until she fell asleep as well.


	8. Chapter 8

**AN: **This update is brought to you by all of your kind words and my bad day causing me to reread all of your kind words.

Safe to assume, the reviews make me update more. They make updating more exciting. So thank you very very much to those of you who do.

I didn't really proof this so sorry if there are mistakes, but I figured you'd rather have it now then me spend a day fixing it.

* * *

Tuesday morning Brittany wakes up in her bed to her alarm clock sounding. She notes, as she did the previous morning that waking up with Santana is just better. Sleeping with Santana was better. But unfortunately it's a weekday and Santana probably doesn't want her there all the time, and it's not practical. Right? She shakes her head. Being someone's girlfriend for less than a week shouldn't make you want to never be away from them, Brittany thinks to herself. Not far away, Santana is trying to tell herself the same things. But with Brittany in her arms, everything just feels better. Even mornings suck less. And that's saying something because mornings suck pretty bad, she thinks.

After her first class that morning, she had a half an hour break before the next one. She heads to the next class room, and sits in the empty room waiting for the rest of the class to get there, and does a little bit of homework she had left from yesterday. Things are still going much better now that her and Santana are regularly doing homework together. Her phone starts to vibrate and she's confused because the Latina is in class and who else would be calling? She looks at it, it says 'Home'. Confused, she answers.

"Hello?"

"Hello Brittany it's your mother. Sorry I haven't been returning your calls, your father and I have been busy."

"It's ok."

"How are you doing in classes? Do you think you're going to pass this semester? Be honest with me Brittany." She says harshly. And that hurts Brittany's feelings. She knows that she never did well in high school, but she's always honest. And beyond that, why would her own mother assume she's not doing well?

"I'm doing ok I think. I have tutors."

"Mmm. Well. Remember our deal. If you don't do well enough to keep the scholarship, and we have to pay, you're switching to business. Is this still understood?" Brittany nods. And then makes a sound to the affirmative out loud, remembering that her mom can't see her. Which she's kind of glad for right now.

"So. You're sister and I were talking, your nineteenth birthday is coming up. How do you feel about breast implants? I mean you're barely a B cup." This sentence comes out with excitement. And Brittany is unsure what to think.

"Uh I'm not really-I don't know if I want breast implants."

"Of course you do. Don't be stupid Brittany, it's not that painful. Your sister and I have both had it done. And what do I always tell you?" Brittany's eyes stung with tears. She hates her mother's motto. Really, it's her mother's motto for her. But it still hurts her feelings.

"If you can't be smart, at least you can be pretty."

"That's right. So have you spoken to Tommy recently?" Brittany feels her breath catch at her mother's fond tone.

"No. We're not together."

"Well I didn't know if you'd come to your senses and gotten over your little dispute. His mother and I were talking, we both still think you'll end up together. And you'd me lucky too. Maybe you should give him a call. He's doing really well in football and in classes."

"Oh uh yeah." The blonde is not sure how to respond to her mother. It pains her to hear her mother refer to any of her problems with Tommy as a little dispute, especially the one that finally caused her to walk away.

"Well I've got to go. Meetings and all that. When should I make your appointment with my surgeon? You'll have to go to a consultation first before the actual appointment so you'll need to free dates. I bet I could get you in for both over Christmas break."

"I don't know."

"Well I need to know as soon as possible to make the appointment. So let me know when you want to go soon. Bye."

And her mother hung up. It's not that she didn't know if she'd be available, she didn't know if she wanted a boob job. Her mother had brought it up to her several times in the past. Yeah her boobs were small but she was a dancer and it would hurt if they were too big. But maybe she'd look better if they were bigger. Prettier. She was taller than Santana, but her boobs were much bigger. Maybe she was too small. She looked down at her chest. She hadn't felt bad about it in a long time. Not since last time her mother brought it up, or since Tommy when he'd bring it up all the time. She started to feel sad, and her eyes started to sting again. So she forced herself back into her homework for the last few minutes before class started, and figured she'd think about it later.

On Wednesday she couldn't meet Santana until dinner. She had stayed in one of the rehearsal studios to work on some stuff for her dance improv class when she got the text that Santana was outside. Excited to see her she grabbed her bag, put her shoes on and ran outside not thinking about how little she was wearing.

When Santana saw Brittany exit the building her breath caught. She had on short shorts, a sports bra, and was glistening with sweat. She started at her legs and drew her eye upwards over her defined thighs and over the lightly defined lines of her abdomen. As her eyes continue their journey up she pauses on her girlfriend's chest, she can see the outline of her nipples and she subconsciously licks her bottom lip. She's turned on. No doubt. She drags her focus by force up to Brittany's smiling face and beautiful blue eyes as to prevent having to deal with being hard and uncomfortable all of dinner. Dinner. At the dining hall. Where other people could look at Brittany like that. Nope, no way she thought. She looked in her back seat to see if she had anything to put on over Brittany's barely covered torso when the passenger door opened.

Brittany leaned in and kissed Santana lightly. Relishing in the softness of her lips. "What are you looking for babe?" She asks as Santana looks again to the back seat.

"Just a shirt or something. For you. So you don't get" she pauses. Momentarily distracted by her girlfriends back muscles as she leans down looking into her bag. "uh…cold."

Brittany laughs at the Latina's open mouth stare. She pulls a tank top out of her bag. "It's like eighty degrees out San."

"I also kind of don't want all of those people to get to look at you like that." She said sheepishly. "I mean I'm not being possessive or anything and you can do whatever you want it was just gut reaction I guess."

"It's ok I wouldn't want you walking into a dining hall dressed like this either. You'd cause a sex riot." Santana laughs loudly.

"A sex riot?"

"Yeah. I mean, look at you."

"Look at you B. You'd cause one too. It'd be pandemonium." Brittany's smile shifts to something less joyous.

"Nah. I look like I'm twelve. Completely flat." The blonde's eyes look down to her lap. But she quickly looks back up and smiles. "Let's go! I'm starving."

Santana is confused by the shift in Brittany. Yeah, she doesn't have the biggest boobs but she's thin, they'd look strange on her. Plus, Santana imagines, even if Brittany's were as big as hers dancing might be uncomfortable. Especially on her frame. Plus, Brittany hasn't have shown any real lack of confidence in her body. It's been one point of very little issue for her. Which it should be, she thinks, my girlfriend is fucking beautiful. But she lets it go. Because that's clearly what Brittany wants her to do.

At dinner she manages to try and work in how beautiful she thinks Brittany is, and manages successfully once. The second time she just kind of blurts it out, out of context. Brittany cocked her head to the side and laughed but leaned over the entire table, nearly knocking everything over, to give her a kiss anyway. Some guy at another table makes the mistake of whistling at them as Brittany does it. Santana nearly gets them kicked out of the dining hall when she hits him in the side of the head with an orange and threatens him with the razor blades in her hair. Brittany is pretty sure Santana is the most amazing person in the world.

"So my brothers called. They are definitely coming up. They'll be here Friday. Do you have any plans this weekend? If you really don't want to meet them I can make them not come."

"No! I want to spend all weekend with you. If you want to spend it with me. And of course I want to meet them, especially if they're driving up to approve of me. You think they will right?"

"Yeah B. They will. How could they not? Do you maybe want to spend the night this weekend? Like last weekend only with power? Maybe we could do a movie night or something low key on Saturday?" Brittany nearly leaped over the table again in her excitement that Santana might want to spend the entire weekend with her. But she reined it in. Of course Santana wanted to spend time together, they were girlfriends. So she took a deep breath and composed herself as much as she could. But still bouncing with excitement when she responded.

"Yes!" And then of course, "But could we maybe do some homework too? I am worried about my test next week." Santana rubbed her thumb over the blonde's knuckles.

"Mhmm. Already planned on that. And don't be to nervous Britt-Britt. You'll do well."

After dinner they did the usual routine of homework, this time at the coffee shop instead of the library. And then Santana dropped her off at her dorm and went home. She got a message from Sam that night asking if she wanted to go to the gym in the morning, so she set her alarm earlier, and after a few goodnight texts back and forth with Santana, she fell asleep.

At the gym the next morning with Sam she found herself looking in the mirror at her body. She turned side ways and looked at her profile. Maybe her mom was right. She didn't think she wanted to but if she looked better maybe it'd be worth it? She didn't want to not be enough for Santana. Maybe if she just got them done, her mom would have less to complain about. She'd have more in common with her and her sister. She turned to Sam. "Sam are my boobs small?"

Sam nearly dropped the weight on his chest in surprise before setting it back into its brackets and turning to Brittany. "What?"

"Are my boobs small?" He laughed. "Sam this is serious!"

"Ok ok I'm sorry for laughing. Well first off don't even tell Santana you asked me that question because somehow I'll get hit for it." Then he stood in front of the mirror with Brittany and cocked his head to the side, looking objectively. "Bro to bro?" Brittany nods. "Yeah I mean they are small. But so are you. So it fits. They aren't to small for you I don't think. Like they don't look weird." Brittany looked at him confused. She didn't think she looked weird, just flat chested.

"Thanks. I think." Sam nodded, pleased with himself for being able to help, and went back to weights. Brittany just noted that Sam also thought they were small.

As Brittany was going about her day trying to not be nervous about meeting Santana's brothers as well as trying to not think about what her mother had suggested she received a text from Santana.

From Santana: Hey babe I was thinking if you really are nervous about next weeks test, we should skip LGBTA tonight and study so that way you're less nervous and we have more time together not studying this weekend. Think about it. You look pretty today.

She knew that Santana hadn't seen her yet today how did she know if she looked pretty? Also she was wearing sweats and a tank top because she had dance right after this class.

To Santana: Yes. Good plan. Also how do you know I look pretty? I look homeless.

When Santana read that she laughed out loud getting looks from other people in the lounge in the music building. She loved how funny Brittany was without trying.

To Brittany: You don't look homeless boo. Also, I know because you always look pretty. Meet you for dinner and then studying?

From Brittany: You're cheesy. But I still blushed. It's a date.

That night they met at the dining hall for dinner, and then went to the library. They got through what they could as far as studying went. Brittany was having a hard time keeping herself focused between what her mother had said, the nerves of meeting Santana's brothers, the nerves of the test in general, and for whatever the reason the library felt extra loud today. Plus any time Santana would lean over to try and explain something to her she could smell her perfume and shampoo and she just wanted to lay with her and be with her and it not be about homework. Every time they'd seen each other since Sunday it had been about homework or eating.

She was slightly lost in thought when she got a text from her mother, which she wasn't expecting.

From Mom: I made an appointment for you the week after Christmas break starts.

That's all it said. She stared at it for a second, confused. She hadn't ever said she wanted to do that. She wasn't sure, she needed more time to think. Brittany started to get upset, and Santana noticed the shift in her immediately, although didn't know what it was.

"Everything ok babe? Who was that?" Brittany nods to tell Santana that everything is ok. She didn't know why she felt so embarrassed to talk to her about this. She wondered if Santana would be happy if she had the surgery. What girl or guy wouldn't want their flat chested girlfriend to suddenly not be anymore? Tommy sure mentioned it enough.

"My mom. It's nothing." Santana didn't really believe her. She only had ever heard things about this woman that made her sick. But she didn't want to pry if Brittany didn't want to talk.

"Oh. Do you talk to her often?" She thought the question was generic enough, and she was curious. Brittany shakes her head no.

"I heard from her for the first time a couple days ago. About my birthday."

"Are they going to come visit you or something?"

"No." The way the blonde answered made Santana pretty sure the conversation was over. She could also feel Brittany shutting down, be it from whatever her mother had said, or the amount of homework they'd done today.

"I don't know about you but I'm getting kind of tired. Want to call it a night? We could do some more on Sunday. Give our brains a break?" Brittany looked at her and slowly leaned in and put her head on Santana's shoulder, putting her nose into the Latina's neck and taking a deep breath. Santana could tell Brittany was looking for comfort she just wished she knew what it was for.

"You sure everything is ok B?" Brittany hesitated before answering yes. What she wanted was to ask Santana if she could go home with her. She felt uncomfortable with herself right now and it was a feeling she wasn't very used to. She wanted to talk this out with her. She wanted to not feel so embarrassed about the situation. But she didn't want to overwhelm Santana with her problems, or her feelings. So she just said that everything was fine.

Santana was still unconvinced but unwilling to pry. She didn't know if it was her place. She knew she wanted to pry. That Brittany was her girlfriend, and while that didn't entitle her to anything, it did give her a responsibility to make sure Brittany was ok. But where was the line? It wasn't like she was crying, or that Santana had any proof that something was going on. Just a feeling. So she did what she could to let it go.

They packed up and Santana took Brittany back to her dorm. "So my brothers will be here around seven tomorrow. Want to come to my place a little early?"

"Definitely. I'll walk over after I shower and stuff after class. Is that ok?"

"I guess I can wait that long if I have to." Santana said as she leaned in to capture Brittany's lips in a sweet kiss. They continued to kiss for a few more minutes before they pulled apart.

"I'll miss you till tomorrow." Brittany said. There was something in her voice that made Santana want to hug her. So she did. Hoping that whatever was going on with Brittany was just a weird mood and that she'd be fine by tomorrow.

"I'll miss you too baby." Santana kissed her again. When Brittany got upstairs to her dorm room she wanted nothing more than to just not think and fall asleep. So she got her ipod out, put on a play list that just so happened to coincidentally remind her of Santana. It didn't take long for her to fall asleep, she didn't even change out of her clothes.

After classes the next day Brittany went back to her apartment to change and grab some pajamas. She was extremely excited to be able to sleep at Santana's tonight. She never thought she'd love just laying with someone so much. Tommy never stayed over. He came, got what he wanted, and left. In the rare occasions that he'd accidently fall asleep or they'd be forced to share a bed for one reason or another, she never liked sleeping with him. They always managed to lay as far apart as possible. When she lay with Santana, they were completely tangled in each other and stayed that way all night. Even if one of them had to get up to go to the bathroom, they would retangle as soon as they were both back in bed. She loved it.

She got to Santana's a little before five. She briefly wondered if she should knock. She'd never come to the door without Santana before. She decided she would just in case she walked in and Quinn was there. When the door was pulled open she was glad she knocked because it was in fact the other blonde who answered the door.

"Hi Brittany. Nervous about meeting the wolf pack?"

"Who?"

"Santana's brothers. They're all huge with massive muscles and incredibly loud. They also eat more meat collectively than I've ever seen. We sometimes call them the wolf pack."

"Oh, yeah. I'm a little nervous. I hope they like me."

"I think they will. Plus Santana likes you. A lot. So that counts for a lot too." Brittany smiled at the mention of Santana's name. This didn't go unnoticed by Quinn. She watched the way Brittany's eyes literally brightened at just the mention of the other girl's name. She couldn't help but smile. "She's in her bedroom. Go ahead back." Brittany nodded and headed back towards Santana's room. She knocked before gently pushing the door open.

Santana's head turned toward the door from where she was sitting at her desk. She was met with bright blue eyes and a beautiful smile. "You look beautiful Brit." Brittany blushed. She wasn't sure the dress fit her correctly but she was glad Santana thought so. She was wearing a white and blue dress with flats.

"You do too." Brittany replied. And she did. With her dark jeans and purple off the shoulder top. Santana looked amazing. She always looked amazing.

The thing that aggravated Brittany the most about this situation was that it hadn't really been an issue before. Sure her mother suggested it, as well as her sister and Tommy, but nobody had ever outright said, "you need bigger boobs, you are flat chested" like her mother did on the phone. And then to just go ahead and make the appointment somehow made Brittany more self conscious instead of just angry with her mother for making big decisions for her.

Santana watched Brittany's face fall. While the blonde still held a lot of mystery, she was usually pretty easy to read when it came down to it. "Hey Brit. I kind of have a head ache, do you maybe want to lay with me for a bit?" She lied. She didn't have a headache. But she wasn't sure how else to just outwardly offer physical comfort to Brittany without asking her yet again if everything was ok. If Brittany wanted to talk about it she would, but in the meantime, the least Santana felt she could do was offer this closeness.

Brittany nodded and slipped her shoes off and got onto the bed where Santana was just now laying down. Santana opened her arms, signaling for Brittany to climb into them, which she gladly did. As soon as she was lying down she was completely surrounded in Santana. Wrapped up in her arms, legs tangled together, her scent everywhere. It was the most comfortable she'd felt in days. Suddenly the topic didn't feel so overwhelming to talk about. She was still upset about it, but at least she thought she might be able to bring it up.

"San?" Brittany asks in a small voice.

"Yeah B?" Brittany hesitates to go further so Santana nudges her jaw with her nose before placing a light kiss there. "You can tell me anything."

"Do you" deep breath, she shouldn't be afraid of the answer. "Do you my boobs are to small?" Santana's initial reaction was to laugh. Which judging by Brittany's slightly hurt face was the wrong thing to do.

"What? No. Absolutely not. You're perfect. Perfectly proportioned. Just everything. Brittany you're the most beautiful girl I've ever seen in my life." Brittany bit her lip to keep the tears at bay. She should have known Santana would say that. She should have called her the minute she got off the phone with her mother and then maybe she wouldn't have all of these doubts in her mind. "Where is this coming from?"

"My mom called earlier this week, like I told you. And she told me she was going to get me breast implants for my birthday. She's brought it up a few times but this is the first time she's ever sounded serious. She even made an appointment already." Santana saw red. Who was this woman? Who was she to tell her beautiful perfect girlfriend that she was anything less than that? No mother would do that. The more she learns of this woman, the more she finds herself feeling lucky for her own mother. She hadn't been perfect, but compared to Brittany's she was mother of the year. She took a few seconds to try and calm the anger in her voice before she responded.

"And how do you feel about that?"

"Not very good. I just don't think it's something I really ever thought about. But when I think about it, I don't know what to do. I dance and run and do a lot of physical stuff, bigger boobs would make that harder I think. But why would she say it if I wouldn't look better? Plus, who doesn't want a girlfriend with bigger boobs." She looks away as she says the last part.

"Don't say that Brittany." Santana says maybe a little to harshly. Brittany flinches away from her but the Latina has her held to tightly for her to go very far. "I want you exactly as you are. I don't have words for how beautiful you are."

"But you're shorter than me and we're probably the same weight and your boobs are a lot bigger than mine."

"You're right they are. But that's just how that works sometimes. That doesn't mean that yours don't fit your body. They totally do. I don't know what the fuck your mother's problem is, suggesting her daughter needs bigger boobs, but that's completely asinine. Do you want bigger ones? If you do, really really do, I'll support you. And take you to the doctors. And help you change your bandages or whatever you need. But please don't do this unless you one hundred percent want to. Do you?"

Brittany looks up into brown eyes. She sees so much affection in them. "I don't think so. No. But how do I tell my mom?" Santana reached up and ran her fingers down Brittany's face gently. She kissed the tip of her nose as she contemplated how to answer. Before she could, her phone rang. She checked the screen.

"Is it ok if I answer? It's my brothers." Brittany giggled and pushed her face into Santana's neck.

"It's always ok to answer San." The question hadn't even been funny. But Brittany just felt elated after getting that off of her chest. She laughed at herself for the stupid pun. She really needed to get over this should I tell Santana or shouldn't I thing. It was always better when she talked about it.

"Hello."

"Oh fuck you." Santana blushed. Brittany wondered what was being said.

"Wow. Ok. We're here and ready so why don't you just meet us at the restaurant?"

"Love you too asshole."

Santana hung up the phone and ran her fingers through Brittany's hair once.

"They're early and 'hungry as shit' so we're just going to meet them at the restaurant. Is that ok?"

"Yep." Brittany went to pull away to get up but couldn't because Santana hadn't let go yet.

"We'll finish talking about her and this situation later ok beautiful?" Brittany leaned down and kissed Santana. After a few seconds they separated and fixed themselves up and got in the car to meet the boys at the restaurant.

When they got there Brittany briefly wondered if she'd be able to pick them out or if they looked anything like Santana. She quickly realized picking them out would be very easy. Quinn's description had been accurate. They were huge boys. They were the kind of boys most girls fawned over. And true to what Quinn had also said, she heard them before she saw them. And before she even had a chance to process anything, Santana's hand was being ripped away from hers as one of her brothers picked her up and swung her around.

"San!" He yelled as he squeezed her tighter. She was laughing as she pushed him away. All of the boys looked vaguely similar, and she could tell they were related to Santana but wouldn't say they looked alike exactly. For one, they were all massive, and Santana was pretty small. They all had the same tan skin, dark hair, and dark eyes though. After all four hugged their sister, they all turned towards her. She had been amused by their reaction to seeing their little sister, but now that they were all looking at her, she was extremely nervous again. Santana rejoined their hands together.

"Brit, these are my jerk older brothers. Luis, Diego, Gabe, and Miguel. Guys, this is my girlfriend Brittany." They had all individually heard a little about the girl that their baby sister was dating. But they weren't exactly sure what to expect when they got here. They knew she was pretty from the picture. But they had listened to Santana cry many times over various girls and things they did to her and ways they treated her that they were skeptical of anyone that got to close to hear at this point. They were all very protective, and they loved her very much. All thoughts of suspicion just about evaporated from their minds when Santana introduced them to the pretty blonde at her side.

She stood nervously, clutching Santana's hand like a lifeline. She had unintentionally stepped slightly behind the Latina and was nervously shuffling back and forth. But when Santana looked back at her, and their eyes met, they all had a variation of the same thought. Baby sister is in love. And they were all pretty certain that the blonde returned the feelings. So with that knowledge, Gabe, the same one who had spun Santana around moments ago, stepped forward and gave Brittany a hug. A much gentler docile hug, as everything about the girl screamed nervous. But she hugged back, and they all smiled and said hello to her.

Brittany felt a little better after Gabe hugged her. He wouldn't have if they weren't going to at least try to like her right? They seemed nice. They clearly loved Santana and while that mostly made her happy, it made her heart hurt a little for her lack of relationship with her own sister. But she couldn't help that, she had done all she could.

After they sat down, Brittany felt a little less nervous, although wasn't quite ready to let go of Santana's hand. Which Santana was perfectly fine with. They talked about school, and dance, and vague details of Brittany's life. She didn't go into much detail, and the boys didn't push. Being as perceptive as Santana, they could tell that Brittany wasn't much into talking about the past. So they talked about how they met, and things that made Brittany smile so big all her teeth would show.

By the end of dinner Brittany didn't know if she should be disgusted or not, but mostly she was just impressed. The boys managed to eat an appetizer each, an entrée, dessert, and all of anything that was left on both of the girl's plates. She'd never seen someone eat so much in her life. No wonder they were huge. They must also work out a lot, she decided.

"So are you guys staying at my apartment?" Santana knew it was a possibility. Last time they visited they stayed at the apartment.

"No way herminita. We don't need to hear that." Santana blushed and Brittany was confused. She was about to ask Santana what they meant when she figured it out and blushed too. Would they do that tonight? Not if Santana's brothers were there. But now that they weren't staying… "Just be safe." Luis told her. Slipping something into her hand. Brittany couldn't see what it was.

Santana nearly exploded in embarrassment as her brother handed her a couple condoms. She knew he meant it. Luis was always serious, but just the same, it was embarrassing. They all hugged them both. The boys were headed for their hotel, they had had a long drive and were going to be here until Sunday morning so there was time for catching up tomorrow. Santana couldn't say she was disappointed. She hadn't had much alone time with Brittany lately.

When they got into the car, Santana got lost in thought. Should she do what her and Quinn and talked about tonight? She wondered if Brittany was in the mood. She was a little embarrassed to ask and couldn't wait for the day when their relationship was comfortable and broken in and she'd just know. "Hey Brit. Are you tired?"

"Nope. Why?" She asked, completely oblivious as to what Santana was trying to figure out. Honestly, she'd been lost in her own head thinking about the same thing.

"I was just wondering if maybe you wanted to let me uh you know" she trailed off. Cursing herself for not being able to just say the words confidently. She hoped Brittany would catch on. And she did. She was glad Santana brought it up.

"I think so. If you want to. I can do stuff to you too." Santana shook her head as she pulled into a parking spot. She got out and hurried over to open Brittany's door, pulling her out of the car and into her arms.

"I want tonight to be about you. If you really want to, we can do whatever you want. But mostly, I really just want to make you feel good." Brittany nodded, mouth suddenly dry. She was nervous, but she wanted this.

They got into the apartment and Santana asked Brittany to wait in the living room for a second. When Santana got into her room she lit a few of the candles that were still strewn about her room. She pulled the covers down on her bed, and put a bottle of nice lotion on the bedside table. The last thing she did, seriously hoping that all of this would come off as romantic, and not terribly cliché, was hit play on a play list she'd made.

"Ok Brit. You can come in." When Brittany walked in her breath caught. She hadn't been totally sure what Santana was doing but everything looked perfect. The room felt warm, and light enough that they could see each other but not so light that it felt uncomfortable. The low music kind of made her want to dance. So she placed out her hand for Santana to take, and pulled her into her arms. They held each other tight, nervous for different reasons, but excited too. After a few moments, Santana leaned up and kissed Brittany gently. The kiss quickly deepened as she slid her one hand around to cup the back of the blonde's neck, and placed the other on her hip. After a few moments the kisses became more heated and Santana pulled away gently. She wanted this to move slowly. She wanted to be able to build Brittany up. So she started kissing her again, slower, gently. Their tongues occasionally touching lightly.

Brittany could feel her body heating up. She loved kissing Santana. She thought she could maybe do it forever. She also could feel the beginnings of the knot of tension build in her lower belly.

Eventually Santana pulled away. "I want to give you a massage." She said. "Would that be ok?"

Other than at the doctors from dance injuries, Brittany had never had one. But she did know that she wanted Santana's hands on her. She nods. But then thinks of something. "Would you change? Into pajamas? Or anything. I don't want you to wear those." She brushes her thumb just above Santana's waistband, where her compression shorts are peaking out just a bit. She smiled, loving the way Brittany cared about her comfort as well.

"Of course B. I'll be right back." She grabbed a pair of boxers and a tank top from her dressers and ran to the bathroom and changed as quick as she could. Grateful that Brittany had thought about it because she wasn't going to want to have to get up and change after they were done, she ran back into the room trying not to look to eager. She was putting her hair up in a bun as she walked back into the room. Brittany watched her walk towards her. Noting that this was how she liked Santana best. She was absolutely beautiful all the time, but when she felt completely comfortable, she seemed even more radiant.

She reached Brittany and put her arms around her waist. "Can I take your dress off?" Brittany nodded. Santana then went behind her and unzipped it at the center back before letting it fall gently to the ground. Brittany stepped out of it wearing nothing but a strapless bra and underwear. Santana took her back into her arms, closing her eyes for a moment at the feel of the blondes skin under her hands as she ran them up and down her back. "Ok. Go ahead and lay down on the bed, face down." She pecked Brittany's lips before releasing her to do as she had asked.

Once Brittany was lying down, Santana gently climbed on the bed, and straddled the blonde, with her knees on either side of Brittany's thighs. She started by just running her fingers up and down Brittany's back and sides, just letting her get used to the touch. She felt goose bumps form under her fingers, and the muscles of her back twitch. She kept checking Brittany's face for any sign of discomfort, but right now she had her eyes mostly closed with a gentle smile on her face. Despite having no idea what she was actually doing, Santana thought she might be on the right track.

After a few minutes of this treatment, she leaned over, pressing herself against Brittany, to grab the bottle of lotion. She squirted a good amount in her hands, warming it, before reaching up start massaging Brittany's shoulders. Brittany didn't thinks she had ever felt something so soothing and amazing before. She couldn't even help it when a small moan escaped her lips. When she felt the tension in Brittany's shoulders start to ease, she decided to take it a step further.

"Do you mind if I take this off?" She asked quietly, running her finger along clasp of Brittany's strapless bra. After receiving a headshake indicating it would be ok, she undid the clasp and gently pulled it out from under her, and threw it across the room. She put more lotion in her hands, warming it again, and began to massage the rest of Brittan's back. She loved that she could feel Brittany relaxing under her hands. This was definitely something they'd be doing again. She let her hands go down onto Brittany's sides, and over her rib cage, across the slight swell of her breast. Then she went down Brittany's arms and individually massaged both of her hands. She got some more lotion and shifted to the side allowing her to massage the backs of Brittany's legs, down onto her calves, and much to Brittany's enjoyment, her feet. She'd never felt something so amazing, being a dancer, her feet nearly always ached at least a little and this was the first form of real relief she could ever remember. After Santana had massaged everything she could reach, she decided to move forward again.

"Do you think you'd feel comfortable rolling over onto your back?" She hoped Brittany would. She knew the recent discomfort with her body caused by her mother hadn't completely disappeared, but she hoped Brittany trusted her enough and believed it when Santana told her how beautiful she thought she was. After only a second of hesitation, Brittany very slowly rolled onto her back. When she was flat on her back, Santana took the sight in. What she saw took her breath away. Brittany lying on her back, warm and open, eyes sparkling in the candlelight, she was slightly flushed from the touching and what she was feeling. Her nipples were hard and her breathing was just a little heavier than normal.

Santana recovered from her staring and grabbed the bottle of lotion again. She started at Brittany's feet and worked her way up her shins and thighs. Then she started to trail her fingers lightly over her abdomen and ribcage. She traced the muscles she found there, and took her time waiting till Brittany's muscles stopped jumping under her fingers to move any higher. When she felt Brittany relax again, she trailed her fingers up over her breasts and over her nipples as gently as possible.

Brittany's breath trembled slightly at the sensation. Her body felt so sensitive. More than she'd ever felt and at this moment she wanted nothing more than to have Santana's hands somewhere on her body forever. Nothing else could ever feel this good.

Santana covered Brittany's breasts fully with her hands and made slight massaging motions, pinching Brittany's nipples lightly. The blondes chest heaved, her eyes closed and her lips parted. Santana leaned down and kissed those lips. Brittany sighed into her mouth, grateful for the contact. They kissed passionately as Santana continued to lightly pinch Brittany's nipples. After a few seconds, she moved the kisses down the blonde's cheek to her jaw, then across to her ear where she lightly bit an ear lobe. Brittany's breath continued to get quicker. Santana kissed down onto her neck, sucking gently earning a quiet moan from her girlfriend.

Next she trailed her tongue down Brittany's collarbone, and down over one nipple. Just one lick and then she blew gently on the moistened area. Brittan thrusted her chest towards Santana's mouth, making it very clear what she wanted. While Santana thought the idea of teasing might be a fun one, tonight was not a night for that. Tonight was a night of giving Brittany everything she wanted. So she took the nipple gently into her mouth and began to suck. She could feel Brittany's hip start to move ever so slightly but she took her time. She didn't want to tease, but she did want to build Brittany up, so after spending what felt like hours on her right nipple, kissing, licking, sucking and blowing, she moved to the left to give it the same treatment.

By time Santana was satisfied and thought that maybe it was time to move on Brittany's hip movements were bigger, and her moans were coming more frequently. Santana pulled her mouth reluctantly way from the blonde's breasts, and sat up to unstraddle Brittany's thighs. "Can I take these off ?" She asked gently, running her fingers along the low cut band, making the blondes breath jump again. She waited for consent, and saw the blonde nod. But before she could pull them down at all Brittany stopped her.

"Wait. Could you maybe take off your tank top? I want to see you too." Nodding, and happy to oblige, she removed her tank top. Brittany quickly reached her hands to Santana's shoulders and pulled her down on top of her for another kiss. Both girls moaning on at the feeling of so much of their skin touching. Brittany's hands pressed firmly to Santana's back let the Latina know that Brittany had craved this contact. She was glad she could give it to her. Perfectly happy to oblige. After several minutes of their tongues gently dueling, they both pulled away. Santana looked into Brittany's eyes, looking for any sign of hesitation. She found none. So she sat up, hooked her fingers into the waistband of Brittany's underwear, and gently pulled them down and off of her legs.

She ran her fingers back up the inside of Brittany's right leg, with only very light pressure. Brittany spread her legs slightly as her hand went higher. First the Latina just ran her fingers gently through neatly trimmed blonde curls letting Brittany get used to the feeling of her fingers. She was in no hurry. She had meant it when she said she could do this all night. She planned to take every single cue from Brittany that she was ready to go further.

When Brittany closed her eyes again and spread her legs further, Santana took that as a sign that she was asking for more. But she wanted to be sure. She also wanted Brittany to get used to the idea that she could tell her what she wanted. "More Brit?"

"Mhmm" the blonde moaned quietly. When Santana had her confirmation, she ran a single finger through Brittany's folds from her center, up to her clit, avoiding the small bundle of nerves, and then back down. Last time she had touched Brittany, she had been wet, but not like this. She was absolutely soaked right now. Santana continued the path, gathering the wetness, and painting the path her finger took with it.

Brittany could feel her hips moving at what felt like their own accord as Santana drew gentle circles around her most intimate parts. It felt amazing. Even better than last time. She could feel the ball of tension growing, and it made her nervous but she ignored it. She didn't want this to stop. Not unless Santana wanted it to, and she'd promised she would stop if she felt the desire to do so. So she just let herself feel, trying to keep her breathing regular, and not making any noises that were to loud.

After several minutes of drawing lazy circles, Santana started to tighten them up so that she was just gently circling Brittany's clit, occasionally brushing right over top of it gently with her fingertip. When she did this, Brittany would buck up into her hand. But she took her time, getting to know what motions Brittany liked, and what speed seemed to continue to work the blonde higher. She mostly watched Brittany's face, occasionally glancing down to her hand to watch her fingers gently stroke Brittany's clit.

When Brittany's head started to tilt back as she bit her lip, and her hips canted forward, almost in search of something, Santana moved her finger slowly downwards. She wanted Brittany to feel where she was going, so there would be no surprises. When she reached her center, she circled the hole a few times, making sure her finger was soaked in Brittany's juices, and then as Brittany gently bucked her hips toward her hand, Santana sunk one finger inside of her.

Brittany moaned loudly at the feeling of being penetrated by Santana's finger. It felt amazing. When she had been rubbing her clit, it felt amazing, but constantly like something was missing. And now it wasn't. Santana paused letting Brittany feel the sensation for a second before she started to pull out, before pushing in again. After a few minutes of this, the tension in Brittany's lower abdomen felt like it had grown ten fold. She didn't know how much more she could take. It felt like so much pressure. She briefly wondered if it was normal before getting lost in the feelings that Santana was giving her again.

Santana continued to work her finger in and out, for several minutes slowly. Loving the feel of being inside Brittany, even just with her finger. She loved the warm heat that surrounded her, she loved the scent of Brittany's arousal. She desperately wanted to taste her but wasn't going to do that until they had talked about it. So instead she ran her thumb gently back up to Brittany's clit and continued to make circles.

Every few minutes she'd switch it up a little. She would remove her finger, smiling at Brittany's little pout as she felt the loss, and rub her clit with her finger tip a little faster, working Brittany up quicker. Then she would spend a few minutes fingering a little harder and faster. She thought she could feel Brittany getting closer because she could feel Brittany getting tighter, as if her body was trying to keep her finger inside of her. Her little mewls and pants were getting louder and more frequent. After getting Brittany this close and keeping her there for a while she started to get nervous that she wasn't doing something right and that's why Brittany hadn't had an orgasm yet.

Brittany was overcome with feeling. It was like she never ever wanted this to end. It felt so amazing. But the pressure made her feel like she was going to explode and she had no idea what was happening. She felt like something was going to explode inside of her.

Just when Santana was going to ask Brittany what she wanted, hoping to figure out what she was doing wrong, she noticed the blondes hands clutching the sheets. She needed more contact, the Latina thought. She stilled her finger, but kept it inside of her, and began to shift so that she was laying down, one of her legs crossed over the blondes and laying partially on top of her torso. Then as Brittany opened her eyes to ask if she wanted to stop, she slid her arm behind her shoulders, and pulled the blonde tight to her kissing her deeply. She slid her finger out and felt Brittany pout. She parted their lips and pressed their foreheads together. Then she quickly entered Brittany with two fingers, filling her even more. She watched as Brittany's eyes squeezed shut and heard a moan that sounded more like a squeak escape her mouth.

Brittany's arms flew around Santana pulling her even closer. Santana started to thrust into the blonde at a fast pace. Her muscles burned from supporting her weight plus holding Brittany to her with her right arm, and the thrusting motions with her left. But she had no plans of stopping or slowing.

Brittany moved her hips in time with Santana's thrusts causing her to go deeper than she had been able to earlier. On one particular thrust Santana hit a series or ridges inside of Brittany that caused her to moan even louder. She curled her fingers upwards, quickly figuring out that this was her g spot, and continued to thrust, hitting the spot almost every time. Brittany started to shake in her arms. She began to kiss the blondes sweaty forehead. "You're so beautiful Brittany. So amazing. I could do this forever." She moaned into the blonde's ear.

As the blonde began to shake more violently, she started quickly circling her clit with her thumb again, careful to not lose the rhythm of her fingers inside the blonde. Something was happening and Brittany wasn't sure what it was. "San I don't uh" She moaned again. "San what" another moan.

"Let go baby. Cum for me. Just let go." Santana whispered in her ear. She pulled Brittany as tight to her as she could, and circled her clit even faster, flicking it a few times.

All the sudden Brittany saw white and a strangled cry erupted from her mouth. Santana felt her walls clamp down tightly on her fingers, which she slowed but did not stop. Brittany's arms locked around her tightly as her entire body stilled for a brief second, and then she started to shake even harder than she had been before as her walls convulsed around Santana's fingers. She could feel the blonde's nails digging into her back as she helped her ride out her orgasm, laying kisses all over the blonde's sweaty face. When she felt the muscles in Brittany's arms unlock, she pulled her fingers out from inside her and attempted to loosen her hold on the blonde thinking she might need some room to breathe. But Brittany locked on tighter, so Santana brought her other arm up and circled her completely. Surrounding her with as much of herself as she could because that was clearly what Brittany needed.

After several long minutes Brittany's breathing started to hitch and Santana heard a small sob. "Baby what's wrong?" She got no response. "Brittany tell me what's wrong did I hurt you?"

"I'm not broken." Brittany sobbed into Santana's chest. "He didn't break me. You fixed it." Santana felt tears in her eyes as she nodded.

"I would do anything for you baby. Absolutely anything." She held Brittany as her sobs subsided.

"I'm sorry I cried. That was a stupid time to cry." She said with a hiccup.

"Stop it. It's a big moment. It's a big release. You're allowed to cry, as long as it felt good."

She felt Brittany nod and then pull away from her chest to look up at her. Her blue eyes brighter than she'd ever seen them. "It felt more amazing than anything ever. I hope we can make it happen again."

"Oh I will. Don't you worry." Santana laughed and kissed the top of Brittany's head as Brittany pulled herself in tighter. She felt Brittany yawn.

"Good." As Brittany shifted to try and get closer she felt something pressing into her stomach. Santana became aware of how hard she was just as Brittany did, but found that she didn't really want to do anything about it. Mostly, she just wanted to continue holding Brittany. She wanted to make sure the blonde could feel exactly how much she cared, and she wanted her to feel safe. "I can help you with that." The blonde mumbled sleepily, trying to move her arm in-between them.

"No B. Not that I don't want that, because I absolutely do. But another time. Right now, if it's ok with you, I really just want to hold you." Brittany nodded, eyes closed, sleep coming quickly. As Santana felt the blondes breath even out, she smiled to herself. She had given Brittany something nobody else had, and she was extremely happy about it. She had made Brittany feel comfortable and safe enough to let go.

She took a deep breath and kissed the top of the sleeping girls head once more thinking about the short time that they knew each other. She knew it hadn't been very long but she wasn't sure it mattered. She knew what she felt and tonight solidified it. She loved Brittany. And she'd wait until she thought he blonde was ready to hear it, but she was positive that's how she felt. And surprisingly, it didn't scare her at all she thought, as she drifted off to sleep.

* * *

**AN 2: **So how did smut round two go? I'm hoping that eventually I don't get anxious when I write it and that it will feel more natural.

Any suggestion of things you'd like to see? I know a lot of you want Brittany to be confident, I'm not ignoring you. It's just not right for the story yet. She'll get there. And there will be little flashes of it. But we're not here yet. There's a fair amount of story left, including some more not so happy things. So... stick with it. She'll get there.

Also thank you to the people who really did tell me random facts about themselves last time. That was great. You should continue to do that.


	9. Chapter 9

When Santana woke up the next morning it was to kisses on her neck. Where there had previously been a beautiful blonde tucked tightly into her chest, there was now one straddling her. She heard a small giggle. Felt more kisses. She fought to wake up completely. Enough to use words. She smiled a little, and swallowed in preparation to speak when she felt Brittany's lips close around one of her nipples and suck gently. Her breath caught. Then she pinched herself. Definitely not a dream. Brittany sucked a little harder and Santana moaned.

"Good morning baby." Brittany said, words slightly muffled by Santana's breast, which the blonde was still happily attending to.

"G'morning. Uh. Britt. What are you doing?" She moaned as the girl started to pinch one nipple between her fingers, still sucking on the other. Brittany ran her free hand down Santana's body and cupped her hard cock. Morning wood combined with waking up like this had Santana harder than she'd ever been.

"I thought that was obvious. Want me to stop?"

"No!" Santana practically yelled. She could feel Brittany shake with laughter. "Please don't." Brittany nodded her head and started to move downwards. She grasped the waistband of her boxers and pulled them down, careful not to catch them or rub to hard on Santana's extremely sensitive cock. Santana had assumed next Brittany would grab her, and give her a wonderful hand job. Instead, as soon as she felt the blonde's warm hand grasp the base of her dick, she felt a warm breath on it as well.

Before she could even process what was going on, she felt a warm wet mouth around the sensitive head. Brittany sucked gently before flicking the slit with her tongue. She looked up, she wanted to see Santana's reaction. Santana was propped up on her elbows, watching Brittany, desperately focusing on not cumming early. But when Brittany made eye contact with her, she wasn't sure how much longer she would last.

Brittany used her pointed tongue again to run along the slit, tasting the precum there. Then she took the full head back in her mouth and started to slide down, taking Santana as deep as she could. When Santana felt her tip hit the back of Brittany's throat she had to fight to keep from bucking her hips. She didn't want to hurt Brittany.

Brittany hollowed her cheeks and pulled her head back up, only to drop down again quickly. She bobbed her head up and down a few times, using some of the wetness that had accumulated, she started to stroke her dick at the same pace. When she got back up to the tip she let Santana's dick fall out of her mouth with a wet 'pop' and ran her tongue up the sensitive underside causing Santana to hiss and moan her name.

The Latina fought the urge to close her eyes. She wanted to watch the entire thing. She reached down to brush a piece of hair out of Brittany's face, not wanting it to obstruct the view.

When Brittany felt Santana's hand near her face she cringed slightly. Expecting to feel the inevitable hands tangled in her hair, forcing her to take way more than she was comfortable taking. But before she could even register how scared that made her, she felt a small lock of hair get brushed behind her ear, and four of Santana's fingers, lightly stroke her cheek on their journey back to gripping the sheets. Santana is not Tommy she said forcefully to herself. She was thankful that the brief pause wasn't enough to alert Santana to something being wrong. She circled Santana's head with her tongue several times before swallowing it once more. Finding for the first time ever, that she didn't mind the taste at all, and when she breathed in. all she could smell was Santana. She loved the tiny high-pitched noises Santana was making and the way she'd moan her name every few seconds.

As Brittany bobbed her head up and down, she ran both hands up the outsides of the Latina's thighs, over her hips, and grasped her waist, wanting to feel more connected. Santana thought it felt even better with Brittany's hands moving over her skin. She felt Brittany's lips and tongue moving upwards again, and to her dismay, she let her dick fall from her lips. Then Brittany stared her right in the eyes and laid a series of small fluttering kisses, first to her slit, then to the sensitive underside of the head, all the way down to her balls, and then with a broad lick, made her way back up. Santana felt her muscles involuntarily tighten and knew she couldn't hold back much longer.

"Britt I'm gonna cum." She was going to shoot any second. "Britt you don't have to…" Brittany took the tip back into her mouth sucking while jacking Santana off with her other hand. The message was clear. Seconds later, Santana let out a moan and shot the first string into Brittany's mouth, Brittany swallowed and kept sucking. With her other arm she circled around Santana's back, doing what she could to hold her while she came. Brittany continued to suck until Santana had emptied her load into her mouth. She gently released her cock, laying one more small kiss to the tip before crawling back up to lay beside Santana.

The Latina climbed into her arms before she had even fully lain down, Brittany wrapped her up and stroked the skin on her back, feeling Santana's muscles in her legs continue to twitch. She desperately wished she could kiss Santana but knew that was probably not ok. It never had been an option before. As if reading her mind Santana looks up at Brittany, eyes wide and wanting. "Please kiss me."

"I'm allowed?" Brittany whispered.

"Please. I need you closer." Brittany leaned down and captured the brunette's lips with hers in a gentle but passionate kiss. Santana moaned at the taste of her still in Brittany's mouth. She couldn't believe that just happened. She pulled away and rested her forehead on Brittany's collarbone. "That was so amazing. Perfect." Brittany smiled into Santana's hair. She was glad she could make her feel so good. "That was my first time with, you know, oral sex." Brittany paused.

"That was your first blow job?" She felt Santana nod. "You gave me my first orgasm and I gave you your first blow job." She liked that they still had some firsts left to give each other. She wished that Santana had been all of her firsts "I've never had oral sex given to me either."

"Really?" Santana asked in disbelief. Although she guessed she shouldn't be surprised, that would have been purely for Brittany's pleasure, and why would he have ever done that?

"Yeah To-" Santana put a finger to Brittany's lips.

"Don't say his name while we're naked B. It feels wrong." Brittany nodded. Agreeing.

"He said it was gross, so we never did it. Which is fine with me. It probably wouldn't have been good anyway."

"So you don't want to try it?" Brittany sensed a slight bit of disappointment in Santana's tone.

"Why? Do you? I wouldn't want to make you-"

"You wouldn't be making me! I really want to try!" And that was the truth. She did. She'd never done it before, but even the thought of it turned her on.

"What if it's gross, like what if I'm gross?" Brittany was self conscious about the idea, despite having just gone down on Santana with no reservations. The cause was obvious.

"It won't be, and you're not. I've seen it. You're definitely not gross. But I don't want to do anything that will make you uncomfortable."

"I want to try it." She said with resolve in her voice. "I want to give you every first I have left. But" Santana raised herself up so she was eye level with Brittany, hearing the insecurity in the blonde's voice. "could we maybe try it right after I take a shower, so you're less likely to think I'm gross?" Santana feels a rush of sadness at Brittany's deep-seated insecurity, but she pushes it down, smiles, and kisses the tip of Brittany's nose.

"If that's what you want, that's what we'll do. I'm really excited to try, I love making you feel good." Brittany loved the honestly in Santana's voice. She was starting to get excited by the idea too.

"But for right now, cuddle." Brittany demanded pulling Santana back down, who giggled and wrapped all her limbs around the blonde as tight as she could.

"Tell me something I don't know about you." Brittany said, running her fingers up and down the Latina's spine. Loving the feeling of her warm soft skin under her fingertips.

"Hmmmm. I can't hula-hoop. Now you tell me something."

"I desperately wish I could have a cat. I've never had one, but I've always loved them."

"If only you didn't live in a dorm. Tell me something you like about yourself." Santana kissed the skin just below Brittany's collarbone.

"I am an awesome dancer. I don't think it's just natural talent or whatever. I think it's practice. I used to dance all the time. Hours and hours and hours a day. It was the only thing that made me happy." Santana kissed her skin again.

"I can't wait to see you dance."

"I can't wait to hear you sing."

"I'm surprised you haven't heard yet. I sing all the time. I can sing for you tonight, if you want."

Brittany's face broke out into a huge grin. "Please. But I can't dance for you. Unless we go to the studio. But I didn't sign up for any time. I'll break everything in your living room if I try to dance there." Santana laughs.

"Then how would we watch scary movies? Well, do you plan on dancing for the stupid talent show thing?"

"I actually forgot about that. Maybe. Are you doing it?"

"Mercedes is on the planning committee and is forcing me."

"Sign me up then. It'll be fun. Maybe I will dance and sing. I can't sing well but I like to try."

"When is your first dance concert? I know they have them like three times a year."

"The first one is in late November but I doubt I'll get into that one. Fingers crossed though, auditions aren't to far away."

"You'll be amazing." Santana hears her phone go off and kisses Brittany before picking it up to check the text. "My brothers want to know if we want to come swimming at the hotel. Do you want to go?" Brittany's eyes go wide.

"Yes! Oh my god yes! I love swimming in hotel pools. I need to go get my swimming suit though." She hugs Santana quickly in her excitement.

"Ok. Let me change, and then we'll go. Let's just grab some cereal bars and then we can go out for lunch with my brothers." Brittany lets Santana go so she can get up. She can't stop herself from feeling slight arousal in the pit of her stomach as she watches Santana walk over to her dressers. "I don't want to put these stupid things on." Frustration evident in her voice. She throws them on the bed, noticing Brittany staring at her, a faint smile on her lips. "Britt!"

"Huh?"

"You're staring." Brittany breaks out of her daze as Santana hits her in the face with a pair of board shorts.

"Can you blame me? God you're sexy." Santana ducks her head. "What were you saying? I'm sorry."

"Just that I don't want to wear stupid compression shorts. I hate wearing them swimming more than I hate wearing them in general."

"Then don't wear them babe. You shouldn't feel like you have to. We talked about this. You should wear them because you want to. If you don't want to, then don't.

"What if someone can tell about my" she gestures to her currently naked lower half. She briefly wonders when she got so comfortable around Brittany that she could just stand in front of her naked. But decides ultimately, she's just glad she has someone to feel comfortable in front of. Plus she gets distracted because now Brittany's standing, and she is also naked. Which is very distracting.

One corner of Brittany's lip lifts in a smirk. She likes that Santana is looking. But she walks over and wraps the shorter girl in her arms. "So what if they can? She kisses the Latina's forehead. "They wouldn't be able to confirm anything anyway, and I doubt anybody will notice anyway."

"It wouldn't embarrass you to be with me if someone said something?" Brittany shakes her head, lips still pressed to Santana's skin.

"No. Anna said things and I didn't care. Why would I care? In case you haven't noticed, I'm a fan of your penis. Someone else mentioning it wouldn't make me feel anything. Unless it made you uncomfortable. In which case, I'd want to protect you from that. But not because I'm embarrassed. I feel lucky to be seen with you, to be your girlfriend." Santana squeezed Brittany's naked body tighter to her. She thought her heart might explode from her body with all the feelings she had for Brittany. Multiplied by the fact that she was protective of her too. And the fact that she just said she liked her penis didn't hurt.

"I'm not going to wear them."

"Good. Now get dressed. I want to swim." She smacked the Latina's butt earning a squeal from her as she grabbed her bikini top out of the drawer. She slipped her board shorts on, the bikini top, a tank top and hoodie. It was just starting to get a little cooler out. When she turned around Brittany was throwing on her clothes from yesterday.

They left the apartment and drove to Brittany's dorm room, she opted to run up alone and get changed, promising Santana once again that she'd get to see her room soon. When she got upstairs Rachel was sitting on her bed with some books, Brittany waved in greeting and went to her closet to find her swimming suit.

"Hello Brittany. I haven't seen you much lately."

"Yeah I've been busy." She said off handedly. There was a pause and then she heard Rachel speak in a much different tone than Brittany was used to hearing.

"Brittany can I ask you a question?" Brittany turned around not wanting to seem rude even though she had to go.

"Yeah go ahead."

"Do you not like living with me? I just never see you, you're only here when you sleep or if you're picking stuff up. I'm sure you've made tons of friends already, but I just well, I'm sure you won't be surprised to hear I haven't really made any."

"I like living with you." She cut Rachel off. She felt really bad. She had always assumed that when Rachel wasn't here she was off with her friends. She would have made more of an effort. Or at least she'd like to think she would have. "And I'm sorry I'm always coming and going. I don't really have many friends. Just a few and my-" She wanted to tell Rachel about Santana, but she didn't know how Rachel would take it and she thought maybe it wasn't something to just throw out there. It deserved a real conversation. "my dance classes" she covered "take a lot of rehearsal time. But we should hang out sometime soon." She hoped the others wouldn't mind. But she felt terrible. And Rachel really wasn't that bad. When the tiny diva smiled, Brittany knew she had said the right thing.

"Ok!" She then launched into a story about one of her classes, so Brittany decided to just change in the room, Rachel just turned her head unphased. After she changed she grabbed her 'LOPEZ' hoodie, apologized to Rachel for having to leave, and ran back out to meet Santana.

"I love when you wear that hoodie."

"Good because it's my favorite one." Santana took her hand and kissed the back of it as she pulled out of the parking lot and headed towards the hotel. After arriving, getting out of the car Santana was struck with a sudden flash of insecurity. Brittany was a few steps ahead of her.

"B" she said in a small voice. "Hey B can you come back here." She said a little louder this time. Brittany heard and turned around mid stride.

"What's up babe?" She walked back towards where Santana was standing. The Latina looked like she was trying to curl in on herself. She put her finger under her chin and lifted until their eyes met. "Tell me San."

"Can you see anything? You can't tell can you?" She hated that the world made Santana feel like this. It wasn't a big deal. It was Santana's business. And now her business. But she wanted that business. So why would anyone else care? Obviously they had cared in the past though. And people like Anna had done this to Santana. Made her nervous and anxious when all Brittany could see when she looked at Santana was how amazing she was. She kissed her lips gently and then stepped back to get a good look.

"Turn to the side." Santana did. "Ok, honestly I can tell just a tiny bit. But I promise Santana, if I didn't already know, and if I wasn't looking for evidence, I would not be able to tell."

"Promise?"

"I will never ever lie to you." She reached her hand forward for Santana to take, and she did. They walked towards the hotel lobby and went up to the room that Diego had text to Santana earlier. They knocked and were let in and both quickly swept up in hugs from the older boys.

"Ok. Pool time!" Gabe yelled punching Miguel in the shoulder, who promptly tackled him to the bed in what looked like a vicious headlock. After several minutes, and just as many attempts to break them up, they all managed to get their swim trunks on.

"I'm just going to leave my stuff up here." Santana said, so Brittany nodded and followed suit. She took her hoodie and tank top off, just leaving her shorts and bikini. She turned around at the same time Santana did. They had seen each other completely naked so this should have been nothing, but Brittany could not force herself to look away from Santana if she had tried. Which she did not. Santana was standing there in black and red board shorts with a black bikini top that didn't leave much to the imagination.

Santana was having a similar reaction to Brittany. Her pale skin set off the light blue bikini nicely. She stepped forward to hug Brittany when she felt a towel hit her in the side of the head. "Yo. Let's go! Enough eye sex. And seriously you guys couldn't wear something a little less revealing? If I have to fight someone..."Gabe mumbled walking out of the door. The girls smiled at each other, slightly embarrassed, and clasped hands and walked out of the door towards the pool.

As they were walking down the hall Brittany noticed two things. Santana's brothers were huge. Santana was pretty small. She stood maybe 5'5". A few inches shorter than Brittany who stood at about 5'8". So Brittany knew she wasn't short. But Miguel, who was the shortest of the brothers, was at least 6'2". They were massive. The next thing she noticed was that they had fallen into what felt like a very practiced formation. Two of the boys in front of them, and two behind. "Do you guys always walk like this?" She whispered to Santana.

"Yeah. I was a very protected, very spoiled baby sister." Brittany nodded. "It's kind of embarrassing sometimes. But whatever, I'm over it."

"I think it's wonderful." Brittany nudged the shorter girl with her shoulder. As they walked past the lobby, they encountered another group of boys who were obviously staring at the two girls, despite being surrounded by what felt like a literal wall of muscle. Brittany felt uncomfortable under their obvious leering for about half a second before Diego stepped in front of the guys. "Bro. Avert your fucking eyes. Now." He said standing at his full height. The unsuspecting boys looked like they were going to wet themselves before they got up and awkwardly walked away.

"See. Protective." Brittany still liked it. "Fair warning, they will probably throw you in the pool." She nodded fully prepared. When they got into the pool area it was empty for the most part. Brittany was excited to see that it was a pretty big pool, with a huge hot tub. This was going to be fun. She took her shorts off and turned around to ask Santana if she was going in right away when Gabe picked her up and tossed her in the pool as though she weighed nothing. She came up laughing in time to see Miguel and Luis both grab Santana and launch her upwards really high before she came crashing back into the water. The Latina came up sputtering and yelling in Spanish and before she was surrounded by a nearly naked, very wet Brittany. Feeling the blonde surround her had an instant calming effect. She pulled the blonde into her and watched as a small water drop fell from her eyelashes. Until all four boys jumped in, tidal waving them and ruining the moment in the process.

After a couple hours of swimming, playing, and being tossed around the pool like rag dolls, Santana noticed Brittany's lips were turning blue. "Cold baby?" Brittany nodded as she hugged herself and her teeth chattered lightly. "Let's get in the hot tub." Santana suggested. Brittany readily agreed and they climbed out and into the hot tub, the four brothers following suit. As Brittany was about to sit down next to Santana, she felt hands grasping her hips, and pulling her to sit in front of, and between the Latina's legs. Santana rested her hands on Brittany's firm stomach, and Brittany leaned her head back against Santana's shoulder, receiving a few small kisses to her neck.

"So I know we asked last night where you guys met but we didn't really get the details?" Luis asked.

"She came to an LGBTA meeting, and even though I swore I wasn't going this year, Quinn made me go, and I saw her" she punctuated this by tightening her hold on Brittany. "And I knew I had to talk to her, so I did. We became friends even though I'm pretty sure I wanted more from the second I saw her. But I wasn't really sure if she was into me, or if she was even into girls period."

"Definitely yes to both." Brittany cut it. "And then we were at a party and Anna said some horrible things, and I found out that she-" She trailed off. Not really sure if this was a comfortable topic to talk about in front of her brothers.

"Packing the signature Lopez charm" Gabe joked and Santana splashed him. "What it sounds better than lady cock which is what she wanted us to refer to it as for a while. Remember?"

"I'd just rather not talk about anything that might indicate my baby sister is a sexual person at all Gabe." Miguel shifted uncomfortably. Brittany liked that it wasn't because of the fact that Santana was different from most girls in that way, but that he just really didn't want to talk about anything Santana might have. She really liked the Lopez brothers.

"Anyway. Anna kind of shouted it out at a party and I left because I was sure that Britt would want nothing to do with me." Brittany tangled their fingers together. "Which was stupid because she's amazing. But she chased me out and kissed me. Then a week later it was official. It moved fast but I knew I wanted to be with her." Brittany squeezed her hands again signifying that she felt the same way. Then she felt Santana whisper in her ear. "I feel so lucky to have you." And then she placed a small kiss there. Santana's brothers made gagging noises and she splashed them again.

After they finished in the hot tub they got out of the pool and took turns showering so they could go out to a late lunch. While they walked to the restaurant, Luis pulled Santana aside again with an arm around her shoulders. "So. Things are good then yeah?"

"Yeah. Really good." She smiled despite trying not to.

"She makes you happy. I can tell. I'm glad things are better than last year. Are you guys being safe? Using protection." Santana felt like her face was on fire.

"We aren't- we haven't." Deep breath. "We haven't had sex yet. And Brittany is on birth control. So we are ok. When it does happen." Luis nodded.

"Ok. Just checking. You tell her you love her yet?" Santana started choking. Luis smacked her on the back a few times as she coughed out something that sounded suspiciously like too early. "With most people, I'd say maybe. But I can see the way you look at her. I know you better than anyone. I practically raised you. You love her. And she looks at you like she's never seen something more amazing. Every time she looks at you her eyes light up. She loves you too. I know this."

All Santana could do was nod. She desperately hoped Brittany loved her too. "And you take good care of her. You treat her well and protect her." Santana looked at her brother, who gave her a sad but knowing smile. She was confused. He knew nothing about her. "Sometimes you can just tell when someone's been hurt herminita. Take care of her." She looks at him with more sincerity than he's ever seen in her eyes.

"I will. I am. She's" Santana looks away but Luis hears her whisper 'everything'. My baby sister is in love he thought. He couldn't stop himself from giving her a brief hug, which she was surprised by. When he let her go he saw that the rest of them had stopped walking because Brittany had turned around looking for Santana. The Latina reaches her hand out which Brittany walks back to her to take, feeling better now that they're reconnected.

"What were you guys talking about?"

"Just that he misses me. He maybe be huge but he's pretty much just a mushy sap."

"I'd miss you if you weren't near me. You are an easy person to miss." Brittany leaned in and kissed Santana's cheek. The Latina closed her eyes for a second and thought that maybe Luis was right. Maybe Brittany felt the same way about her as she did.

Brittany hadn't thought much about missing Santana. They hadn't been together very long but she had seen her every day. She knew that there would be days they wouldn't get to see each other but she hadn't thought about what if Santana weren't there for a period of time. Like breaks and vacation. She felt anxious at the idea. She didn't know why she felt that way. She knew she had strong feelings for the brunette. She even worried that her feelings were so strong they'd scare her away. But She didn't know why she felt anxiety at the idea of just being away from her. She moved closer to Santana to comfort herself, and put the idea out of her mind. Santana sensed Brittany's need for closeness and slipped an arm around her while they walked.

The scene at the restaurant was similar to the previous night, the boys ate enough food to feed an army, while maintaining light conversation. Midway through dinner Santana got a text from the Quinn saying that the group was planning on going bowling and that they should all come. Santana proposed the idea to the group and they all agreed. After the brothers insisted on paying again, they left and went back to the hotel so they could grab what they needed and get the car. They drove back towards campus, the boys heading to Santana's apartment, and Santana and Brittany heading to Brittany's dorm because she needed new clothes.

While she ran up, Santana opted to stay in the car. She randomly had a headache and felt kind of funny. She was lying back with her eyes shut when Brittany climbed back in the car. "You ok San?"

"Mhmm. Just a head ache. Ready?" Brittany nodded but made a note to keep an eye on her. When they got back to the house, everyone was ready to go so they left right away. They got to the bowling alley and divided up into teams, Santana gave very little input.

"What's the matter baby sis? Accepting defeat already?" Santana gave a forced laugh and waved him off like she wasn't even paying attention to him. Truth was, her headache had gotten worse and she was starting to feel nauseous. She sat down and put her shoes on. Brittany sat next to her bouncing up and down.

"I haven't bowled in forever. This was a great idea." She flashed a smile at Santana who returned it weakly. "Are you sure you're ok? Head still hurt?" Santana nodded. "Let me get you some water maybe you are dehydrated." Maybe that was it, Santana thought. Or hoped rather. Brittany brought the water back and soon after the game started.

Santana forced some water down and forced a smile on her face. She wanted to have fun. She wanted to hang out with her friends and her girlfriend. Whatever this was would pass. She was fine like an hour ago. So she bowled a few rounds, trying to keep her energy up, and not alert her very happy girlfriend that anything was going wrong. Unfortunately soon the not feeling well took a very quick turn to miserable. She sat down and tried to breathe deep and drink more water but she felt weak and her hands were shaking.

Brittany noticed Santana's turn was coming up but she wasn't standing with them, she looked around and saw her sitting in the seats. The blonde walked over to her girlfriend and saw that she was noticeably pale. "Baby what's wrong?" She asked. Santana looked up at her, her eyes big and sad.

"I don't feel very well. I think something is wrong." Brittany pressed her cheek against Santana's sweaty forehead. She felt Santana attempt to protest but she wasn't having any of it.

"You feel warm. What else is wrong?"

"Head ache. Nauseous. I feel weak."

"Did anyone else eat any of your food at lunch?" Santana shook her head.

"I don't think so."

"I think you have food poisoning baby. Awww." She ran her fingers down the side of Santana's face. "Ok. Let's go. I can drive your car back to your apartment."

"But you're having fun. I can wait. Or I can drive myself home. I don't want to ruin your night."

"Santana. You are not driving yourself home and there is no way you're staying here. I wouldn't have any fun here knowing that you were sick somewhere else. Please. Just let me take care of you." Santana nods pitifully. "Ok Baby. Let me just tell everyone we are leaving." Brittany walks away and up to Luis. "Hey Santana is sick I'm driving her car home." Luis's eyes widened slightly. Santana was letting her drive her car?

"What's wrong with her? Does she need us?"

"Food poisoning I think. She managed to eat all of her food before any of you could make it disappear, which is why I think she's the only one. I will text you if she isn't feeling better in the morning. Maybe you guys could stop by and say goodbye before you leave?"

"Definitely. Call if she needs anything. She won't. She's stubborn." He walks over to Santana. "Feel better sis." He kisses her on top of her head and goes to tell the others that they're leaving. Brittany helps Santana up and walks towards the exit.

"Hey guys Brittany and Santana are leaving. Santana doesn't feel well."

"She's going to drive home?" Quinn asks.

"No she's letting Brittany drive her car." They all look at each other with disbelieving looks on their faces.

"So it's serious then." Gabe says with a nod. "Nobody drives her car but her."

By time Brittany got Santana into the passenger seat she looked even worse. "I need you to tell me if you are going to throw up so I can pull over ok?" She said gently, taking Santana's hand and gently rubbing the back of it. Santana nodded and laid her head back against the headrest. When they were nearly back to the apartment Brittany pulled over at a gas station. "I'll be right back. Just sit tight." She ran in and grabbed some crackers, ginger ale, and water. After paying and the cashier making a comment about somebody being sick, she hurried back out to the car not wanting to leave Santana alone for long.

"If you want we can stop at your dorm and then I'll drive myself home. I don't want you to have to deal with me." Brittany looked over at her. Santana was looking at her with the saddest look on her face.

"Don't be silly San. I'm going home with you. Just let me take care of you."

"But what if I puke? That will be so embarrassing."

"Baby you're sick. I'm your girlfriend. I take care of you no matter what gross things your doing. Ok? That's the deal. If I were sick would you let me go home alone?" Santana vehemently shook her head no. "Ok then. We're almost there." She pulled into the parking lot and parked the car. Santana was nearly sleeping by time Brittany had shut the car off. She hated that she had to get her out of the car but knew she'd feel better once she was in bed. She got out and ran around and opened the passenger side to help Santana out. She felt so weak Brittany wanted to carry her but knew Santana would definitely not put up with that. So she put her arm around her waist, and supported as much of Santana's weight as the Latina would allow.

When they got inside Brittany took Santana back to her room immediately. "Here you just sit down." The Latina nodded, too sick to really fight if she wanted to. She watched Brittany walk over to her dressers and grab a tank top. She came back over to her. "Lift up your arms." Santana did as she was told and Brittany took her shirt off. Then she reached around and unhooked her bra and pulled that off as well. She did her best to not let her eyes linger on Santana's breasts because she felt a little like that was taking advantage of her sick girlfriend. She gently slid the tank top over her head and let Santana put her arms in. Then she pulled her back up and undid her pants, sliding them down, and pulled them off after Santana had kicked off her shoes. She pulled the covers back and let Santana lay down before she grabbed the bag and went to take it to the kitchen.

"Where are you going?" The sick brunette pouted. Brittany walked back over to the bed and bent down to kiss her cheek.

"Just to put this stuff in the fridge. I will be right back." She went to the kitchen and put the ginger ale and water in the fridge. Before she got the crackers put away she heard the bathroom door shut. She quickly walked back towards there, worried that Santana was throwing up. Her fears were quickly confirmed when she heard the sounds of Santana puking, and pitiful moans. She knocked on the door and got no response, so she just walked in.

"You don't have to" Santana was cut off by her own body trying to turn itself inside out. Or that's what it felt like. "It's gross." She whined.

"Baby shhh. It's fine." Brittany knelt down beside her and pulled her hair back with a tie she had around her wrist. Then she started rubbing Santana's back as she continued to throw up. After about half an hour the throwing up seemed to slow down. Brittany hadn't left Santana's side for even a second. Honestly she was surprised that she was able to handle it this well. Normally somebody throwing up made her want to throw up herself but with Santana she just knew she needed to be here for her, and that knowledge made it more bearable. When Santana seemed to have stopped throwing up and was just sitting with her head resting on the toilet, Brittany stood up to get a washcloth to help wipe the Latina's face.

When she knelt back beside her and ran the cool washcloth across the Latina's cheek, she lifted her head to look at the blonde. "You think you want to go lay back down? I can bring the trash can just in case."

Santana sniffled. "All I can smell is the bowling alley. And I think I puked on my shoulder." Brittany tried to hold back her laughter. She knew Santana was miserable.

"Ok. Well let's take a quick shower."

"I don't know if I can B. Just leave me here. I'm not going to make it." Brittany shook her head.

"Come on. Up you go." She pulled Santana to her feet and let her sit on the now closed toilet. She turned around and started the shower and felt for the right temperature. She turned back around and pulled Santana's tank top over her head before removing her own top and bra.

"Wait. Huh? Am I dreaming?" Brittany chuckled.

"No babe. I'm helping you. I smell like the bowling alley too anyway. So lets get a shower together, and then we'll go to bed. Ok?"

"I'm so mad that I'm sick right now."

"I promise you will have many more non sick opportunities just like this." She pulled Santana up and pulled down her boxers before pulling the rest of her own clothes off. She stepped into the shower and helped Santana step in. The Latina wrapped her arms around the blonde's neck and laid her head against her chest. Brittany put her arms around Santana and put her palms flat on her naked back, running her hands up and down in a soothing motion. After a few seconds, she was a little worried about Santana falling asleep standing up so she grabbed the shampoo and nudged Santana under the water. She poured the shampoo in her hand and gently washed the pouting Latina's hair, and rinsed it thoroughly. After she conditioned and rinsed she quickly did her own hair. Next she grabbed the soap and with the help of Santana washed her body gently. While Santana leaned against the wall with her eyes closed, she washed her own as fast as she could, wanting to get the Latina out of the shower sooner rather than later.

After they had gotten out, Brittany brushed Santana's hair, taking care to be extra gentle. Then they both brushed their teeth and, wrapped in towels headed back to the bedroom. Santana collapsed on the bed while Brittany set a garbage can on her side just in case. "As much as I'd like to just go to bed, we need to put clothes on in case you get sick in the middle of the night." She heard a grunt from Santana. "Can I borrow some shorts and a tank too?" Another grunt. She smiled. Adorable, she thought.

She got out two pair of boxers and to tank tops, quickly dressing herself in one set and then walked over and sat the Latina back up. She put the tank top on her and then knelt down in front of her to put the boxers on face to face with Santana's now very flaccid penis. Her mind flashed back to a similar position she'd been in earlier today and shook her head. How quickly things can change. She pulled the boxers up as high as she could, the Latina tugged them the rest of the way up. The part of Santana's brain that was still sort of functioning could not believe her very sexy girlfriend had just been naked in the shower with her, and then eye level with her very naked dick and it hadn't responded. Like at all. But the rest of her brain just wanted to cuddle and was glad her dick knew that she was sick and that it should be responsible.

After the blonde shut the lights off and closed the door most of the way she climbed into bed, not sure if Santana would want to cuddle feeling the way that she did. She quickly got her answer in the form of a very meek "hold me please" from the Latina. So she pressed her front to as much of the Latina's back as she could and wrapped her in her arms and drifted off to sleep.

She must not have been sleeping very deeply because she soon woke when she felt Santana start to stir. "San?" No answer. She brushed the hair back from the Latina's eyes and they were shut. Must be dreaming she thought. But before she could lay back down she saw the Latina's eyes pop open and heard a sleep slurred I'm gonna puke or something close to that. Brittany helped her lean over the side of the bed so she could throw up into the garbage can. After several violent heaves and more throwing up (how did she even have anything left in her?) she stopped again. "Are you going to throw up more?" She asked.

"I think so." Santana half spoke half cried. The sound broke Brittany's heart.

"Ok. Lets go back to the bathroom." So she helped her up, bringing the garbage can with them, and brought her back to the bathroom where she lowered her gently to the floor in front of the toilet.

After a few seconds and no puking Santana thought she might be in the clear so she lifted her head away from the toilet. Bad move, she thought. As her stomach forcefully ejected itself again into the toilet. She heard Brittany whispering to her but was also aware that she was cleaning out the puke filled garbage can in the bathtub. She couldn't help but be a little mortified.

"I'm so sorry Britt." She said more into the toilet than anything. Brittany finished cleaning out the can and sat back down next to Santana, resuming rubbing soothing circles into her back.

"Don't be Santana. There is absolutely on where else I'd rather be than taking care of you right now. Ok?" Santana nodded.

They sat there for a little longer until it seemed as though this wave of sick had passed. Brittany helped her up and the Latina brushed her teeth again. They headed back into the room, Brittany bringing the garbage can again. They lay back down and Santana pressed herself in as tight as she could, needing the comfort that the blonde offered. Brittany just wrapped her up loosely, she didn't want to squeeze to tight. Santana's last thought before she fell asleep was that she didn't know how much longer she'd be able to hold out without whispering I love you.

After she was sure that the Latina had fallen asleep, and seemed to be sleeping soundly she decided it was ok to fall asleep herself. But before she did, Brittany did whisper "I love you" onto the skin of the Latina's forehead, just to try them out. She loved the way they fit. So she pressed a small kiss there, as if to seal in the words, and fell asleep herself.

* * *

**AN:** So. What did you think?

Also, a few other random questions.

1. Are there any other ships we are dying to see? I probably won't ever do much more than mention them but, well basically I mean specifically Rachel/Quinn or Quinn/Puck, which would you rather see? It doesn't much matter to me but it will change a few things in the next chapter.

2. Also, we are at a place where location might matter. This is less a question, more a statement. When I started this, locations weren't ever really going to matter. But for some ideas coming up they kind of do. So here's what I'm thinking. The school they are all at is NYU (ish) (I won't ever get into specifics, really.) Santana's family is from New York, but outside of the city, maybe a little north like an hour ish away. Brittany is from a really small town about three, maybe four hours away. I think that should do it.

3. Thank you for your continued offerings of random facts. I still love it.

4. OH! I wanted to ask again, and feel free to PM this or leave it in a review but are there things people really don't want to see? I can't promise I won't include them if they were always intended to happen. But there are a lot of things that aren't nailed down that if you HATE then we won't include them.

Thanks again everyone for your reviews. They make me smile every damn time.


	10. Chapter 10

**AN: **This chapter is crazy long. It's also crazy late so no editing. I might seriously go back and work on this again tomorrow or the next day but in my state of exhaustion right now, I think it's not bad. So I'm posting.

As always, your thoughts and feelings are appreciated in the form of reviews and PMS. I honestly wouldn't be doing this if not for you people.

One more thing, I have a twitter now. twitter klikeszombies. Find me. Friend me. Listen to my stream of consciousness. Or unconsciousness like right now.

* * *

When Brittany wakes up Sunday morning she's not immediately sure why she did. Her first thought that registers is that Santana is still in her arms. So she must have slept through the rest of the night as well. The second thought that registers is that someone is knocking on Santana's bedroom door. "Come in" she says as quietly as she can with the hope that the person still heard. The door opens and Quinn peaks her head in.

"Hey Britt, is she still asleep?" Quinn realizes that this is a stupid question since she can see Santana's face, clearly passed out on Brittany's chest. Brittany's arm protectively around the shorter girl. Brittany just nods.

"Did she get sick last night? I noticed the bathroom garbage was missing."

"Sorry about that. I wasn't sure what else to use. Yeah she was sick for a while, and then woke up and was sick again. But she slept through the night after that so maybe she's feeling a little better."

"Well, I just came in to check and see if maybe you could wake her because her brothers are here to say goodbye." Brittany nods again, and Quinn leaves the room to let them know the girls will be right out. Brittany starts laying kisses onto Santana's now cool forehead and whispering words of adoration everywhere her lips fall. She runs her hand up and down Santana's arm as well for several seconds before the Latina stirs.

"Good morning baby. Are you feeling any better?" Santana rubs her face on Brittany's arm trying to wake herself up.

"A little." She confirms. "Do we have to get up?" She curls back into the blonde's side.

"Your brothers are here, so we have to say goodbye. Unless you don't feel well, and I can go tell them you aren't feeling up to it." She can feel Santana rotating against her.

"No I want to say goodbye. I'm up." They get up and Brittany throws her Lopez hoodie on and puts one around Santana so she doesn't get cold. She takes her hand and gently leads the way into the living room, Santana shuffling behind her.

"Hey sis. You feeling any better?" Gabe asks gently, patting her on the shoulder.

"A bit. I have a pretty amazing nurse." She looks over at Brittany who is just standing there watching her with a pretty expression on her face.

The boys all nod in agreement before they talk about bowling after they left. Apparently nothing eventful happened, which was probably for the best.

"Hey Britt could you get me a bottle of water?" Luis asked her. Brittany nods and walks toward the kitchen.

"Ok herminita, we wanted to give you this not around Brittany." Luis hands her what looks like a wad of cash. "It's from all of us. Consider it an early birthday gift or something. We just want you to have some extra cash so you can do something special for her. Put it in a date fund or whatever." Santana looks briefly, it has to be a couple hundred dollars.

"This is way to much guys you can't give me this." Santana goes to hand the wad back to Luis. They all cross their arms and give her the same look.

"Keep it. No discussions. We love you and can't wait to see you for Thanksgiving." They start kissing and hugging her goodbye just as Brittany comes back with the water, which Luis thanks her for. They all take turns hugging her as well. Brittany knows that she'll miss them and it strikes her as odd but not at all surprising that she's never actually thought about missing her own sister.

"Do you think we could go lay down some more?" Santana asks pitifully.

"Of course. Still not feeling well?" Santana shakes her head no with a pout. Mostly she feels tired, achy, needy, and cuddly. Lying down with her girlfriend fixes all of those things. She briefly considers telling Brittany about the money her brothers gave her but decides not to because what if she wants to surprise her?

After Brittany helped Santana get back under the covers she crawled in behind her and curled her body around the brunette. She felt the Latina press her back into her front, trying to get even closer so Brittany wrapped an arm around her, tracing small circles on the skin of her stomach underneath her tank top. "Have you thought about what you are doing for the show?" Santana asks after a few minutes of silence.

"Not really. I should do that. Do you know?" Santana shakes her head indicating that she doesn't know either. "San we should totally surprise each other! That would be so much fun." The Latina doesn't know how much fun it would be, waiting to see Brittany till everyone else does but the blonde sounds so excited that she agrees to it. "Can I ask you a favor?"

"Anything B."

"So, my roommate, her name is Rachel she is in the musical theater program. She's been I guess having trouble making friends and I was wondering if maybe we could invite her over for movie night or something. Not that I expect you guys to be friends with her because of me, but they might like her? And at least it would make her less sad." Santana rotates in Brittany's arms and barely brushes their lips together.

"I'm sure that'd be fine." Santana thinks it's a small miracle that, in spite of everything, Brittany is such an amazing person. She kisses her again.

After a few hours of small talk, kisses, and short naps Brittany gets a text form Sam asking if she's still up for the gym today. She should go, she thinks, because she hasn't done much in the past few days but the idea of leaving Santana here sick made her sad. Santana saw the inner conflict the blonde was having and solved it for her. "You should go ahead and go Britt. I'm feeling better and I have to figure out what I'm gonna do for the show anyway so if you want to go you should." After another half an hour of trying to force herself out of bed but getting distracted by Santana's lips (they're very distracting) she gets up to walk home to get her stuff for the gym.

When she gets to the gym Sam asks her how Santana is feeling. He learns in that moment not to get Brittany started talking about Santana, unless that is all you want to talk about. He doesn't mind really. He hasn't known her for very long but he cares about her, and he's notices a big difference in her happiness levels since things have picked up between her and the Latina. After they had been there for a while Sam runs into a guy from his department. They exchange greetings and then he turns to Brittany.

"Yo dude is this your sister? You guys look alike."

"She might as well be." Sam laughs and pulls Brittany into him. He's not sure if this guy was planning on hitting on her but he doesn't even want to see him try. He feels protective of the blonde. He feels protective of a lot of people in his life, it's in his nature. He starts off toward the track where they were originally headed, leaving the other guy behind without really saying goodbye, just kind of shooting him an awkward wave.

That night when she got back from the gym, Rachel was in the room and awake. She thinks maybe now would be a good time to talk to Rachel about Santana and maybe hanging out with them sometime soon. "Hey Rachel how was your weekend?"

"Productive. I got several extra ours of rehearsal in, which as I'm sure you know, you can never have enough of. I also talked with my father about the possibility of them visiting. How was the rest of yours?"

Now or never Brittany. She wasn't even sure why she was nervous, honestly. Rachel never indicated that she might have a problem with it, but she couldn't help but be weary. There were lots of stories about terrible roommate experiences and she didn't want this to be one of the things that turned their situation into one of those. "That's great. Could I maybe talk to you about something?"

"Absolutely Brittany. Is this performance related?"

"More like life related."

"Performance is life."

"Right. But what I mean is that, it's not really a big deal or anything. I just think you should know so in case you have a problem or something we might be able to deal with it. I don't know why you would be, you seem nice and unconservative. You just never know. There are stories all over the news about this sort of thing and I just don't want you to get upset someday after seeing something and then your anger or whatever negative thing you feel might affect my happiness. You know?"

The small brunette cocked her head to the side. "Brittany you haven't actually said anything."

"Oh. Yeah. Ok. Rachel. I am, well not totally sure what I am. But I'm at least bisexual, and I'm in a relationship with a woman." Brittany says with conviction.

"I'm glad you told me Brittney but you have nothing to worry about. I have two gay dads. I don't currently see a reason to label myself as anything, although I am quite certain I am attracted to anyone with a lot of talent." Brittany laughs thinking that Rachel is joking, but the look on the diva's face is no joke.

"Ahem. Ok. I guess then I was just wondering if it would be ok if Santana slept over sometimes. Nothing would happen. Just sleeping. But I want her to meet you and sometimes it might be easier to stay here."

"I don't think that's a problem as long as she doesn't interrupt my routines."

When Brittany gets to dance class Monday morning, the only thing she's really thinking about is lunch with Santana after her next class. It's weird to her that she misses Santana after not seeing her for less than twenty-four hours. And it's not like they hadn't been texting most of that time anyway. But when Santana is around, Brittany feels better, safer. Like somehow with her presence she's made existing just a little bit easier. Which is wonderful and scary because Brittany didn't know existing wasn't easy to begin with. But then again, she thinks maybe she did know that.

Before they begin class the teacher tells them that she has an announcement. The class of mostly first year students quiets down. "As you know, the winter dance concert is coming up. Due to some unforeseen circumstances there is an available slot. Lately I feel as though a lot of the dancers have gotten complacent, thinking that they know before an audition who is going to cast them. So I've decided along with the rest of the faculty that a little competition is in order. So the slot that is available will be filled by one solo that is self choreographed. Auditions will be held in two weeks, anybody from any class is welcome to audition." The rest of the class breaks out into murmurs before the teacher tells them that they need to begin class.

The general feel she got after class ended, listening to her classmates, is that most people aren't going to try because there is no way they'd let a freshman choreograph themselves in the big concert of the semester. Brittany can't begin to understand why they wouldn't at least try. First of all, auditioning is important. It lets people see you and know you want it, and in settings like this where the faculty know them all already, it shows that they aren't complacent. She decides she's going to go for it, what's the worst that could happen? She doesn't get it, and that's not so bad since she wouldn't have gotten a part in the show anyway probably.

She arrives a few minutes early to her next class and thinks about what she might like to do for an audition piece. If she auditions in two weeks, then that only leaves three to four weeks plus tech to choreograph and perfect the piece if she gets it. So she decides she's going to choreograph her audition as well, to be a part of what she'd do for the solo at the concert. That way she's not wasting any time. Now she just needs to manage to focus through this class so that she can tell Santana. And kiss Santana. Probably kiss her first.

A few times.

When class lets out she grabs her things and bolts through the door, the hour and fifteen-minute class only furthering her excitement to see and tell Santana. She didn't honestly think she would be chosen, but she was really excited for the opportunity to prove herself outside of class. She practically runs to the dining hall to see Santana and finds that for once in, she's pretty sure ever, she beat the Latina there.

When she gets the dining hall Santana is greeted by the sight of a very bouncy very excited Brittany. She takes a moment to enjoy the smile that the blonde is wearing before alerting her to her presence. "Hey Britt" Santana watches as Brittany turns in her direction and sees her. What was already a brilliant smile has just morphed into something that would put the sun to shame. Santana thinks maybe she is the luckiest person on earth to be able to put that beautiful of a smile on that beautiful of a girl. She doesn't know if she deserves it, but she'll take it because she doesn't know what she'd do without it at this point.

Brittany bounces toward the Latina and flings her arms around her waist pulling her in tight. She buries her face in Santana's neck. "Hello baby." Brittany places several small kisses to the skin there.

"What's got you so happy B?"

"You. Then there's some other stuff. Let's go get food then I'll tell you."

After getting food, they find a place to sit down and Santana can still feel the excited energy coming off of Brittany. "Ok so tell me what's going on!"

"At dance class this morning, my professor told us that there was a slot open in the dance concert and that they were auditioning for someone to choreograph and dance a solo. And that it's open to the entire department, so I'm totally going to try! I don't think I'll get it but I'm excited to audition for them something that I've done myself. You know?" Santana nods.

"That's great B. Do you think everyone will audition? That's a ton of people."

"No." Brittany swallows the cereal in her mouth. "I know in my class a lot of people were saying they weren't going to do it because there was no way they'd pick a first year. Even if that's true I don't understand why they aren't just trying. And then I think anybody who is a principle in the other pieces would probably not want to audition but I don't know for sure. I'm not friends with anybody in the department really. But if I were dancing in a few other pieces, I would probably not want to also choreograph and dance my own solo. But who knows." Santana nods again.

"Do you know what you will audition with?"

"I think I'm just going to start choreographing the piece, and then audition with a piece of it. That way I don't lose time working on the piece if for some reason they do pick me."

"That's a good idea. I bet a lot of people will probably just use things they've done before and remember."

"You think so?"

"Yeah. I mean that's what a repertoire is for. Being able to reuse things so you can get really good at them. But it's less effective when you're auditioning with the people that have already seen all of that work. Bringing something new is a very smart idea B. You're a genius." Brittany ducked her head. Nobody makes her feel smart like Santana does.

"I'm really excited. I don't want to get my hopes up. But it's just really exciting that they're opening it up as an option."

"You have just as much of a chance of getting it as anyone else Britt. You're amazing." Brittany nearly knocked over everything on the table trying to kiss Santana. She really needed to start just sitting next to her.

"The only bad part is that between that and the talent thingy I am going to have to be practicing a lot. Which means I'll get to see you less." Yeah. Santana knew that was coming. But she also knew that, if it meant Brittany's success, she'd sacrifice time with the beautiful blonde.

"That's ok. We'll see each other when we can, and it's totally worth it." She grabs Brittany's hand. Just wanting the connection. She knows the idea of seeing the blonde a little less shouldn't stress her out but it does a little. She knows it will be fine. She should probably spend more time in the practice rooms anyway.

Truthfully, the idea of spending less time with Santana makes Brittany feel uncomfortable. She finds herself trying to think of times they can see each other before the audition, next Thursday (really less than two weeks. Great now she's nervous about that too.) and the talent show on Friday. As they leave the dining hall she makes a decision. "I'm not going to start working on this tonight, I need a little more thinking time. And I was wondering if maybe you wanted to come over tonight and watch a movie in my room? My roommate is there so you'll get to meet her. And if you want to sleep over she's ok with it." Brittany watches Santana hopefully.

"Definitely." She puts her hands into the pocket of Brittany's jacket and pulls her closer, placing a soft kiss to her cheek. She would never say no to any reason to sleep with Brittany.

"We can't like, do anything. Because she'll be there. Is that ok?" Santana looks up into Brittany's eyes and sees a hint of nervousness there. She kisses her again.

"Of course. Do I get to hold you?" Brittany bites her lip, smiling, and nods. "And maybe a good night kiss or two?"

"Or ten."

"That's all I want Britt. You do know this isn't about sex right?" Brittany nods. Trying to force herself to remember that she means more to Santana than what she can give her with her body. "Ok. Go to class. Text me after and let me know what time you want me to come over." Santana kisses her several times before parting because they are both dangerously close to being late for class.

After class Brittany goes to the library for a few hours to work on some homework. She knows that balancing Santana, homework, and dancing is going to be difficult. She's always known that. When she started school she had never intended to get into a relationship. Not that she regrets Santana at all, she just knows she's going to have to work out a way to balance it all. But tonight, it's Santana. So she texts her and asks her to meet her for dinner before they go to her room.

When they get to the dorm after dinner, Brittany signs Santana in and they head up to her room. "So this is my room." She says as they enter. Santana can immediately tell which half is Brittany's. Her half isn't as neat, and there is various dance attire hanging off of everything. The hoodie that she gave her was lying on the bed next to her pillow. She kind of hoped that Brittany wore it to bed. The idea made her smile. Before Santana could even respond, another person walked in.

"Oh you must be Santana! Brittany has told me all about you. My name is Rachel Barbara Berry. But she's probably already told you about me too."

"Jesus you are small as shit." There was a brief awkward silence.

"Yes. I suppose that is true." Rachel replies just as Brittany starts laughing and hugs Santana from behind.

"She's not that much smaller than you, you know. Be nice San." She kisses the area between her ear and jaw. Santana smiles and presses herself back further. Knowing that there is no way they'll ever be close enough. "Do you guys want to watch a movie?" They both nod. "Ok which movie?"

"Funny Girl!" Rachel exclaims excitedly.

"Oh my God please Brittany no. I can't watch that movie. Don't let her make me." Brittany laughs.

"Maybe a different one Rachel." Rachel pouts. This isn't going exactly the way Brittany had hoped it might. "What about Tangled?"

"I've never seen that before. What is it about?"

"Rapunzel, sort of." Brittany looks to Santana. Truthfully it didn't matter to Santana, she'd agree to anything Brittany suggested. Even Funny Girl. Maybe. If Britt had said it first.

"Sure B. Whatever you want." Rachel watched the two. Santana clearly more at ease when she could touch Brittany. She thought it was sweet, even though Santana herself seemed a little scary.

Brittany got Tangled out from under her bed and handed it to Rachel. "I have to go to the bathroom. Be right back." She left the room. For a few seconds it was silent. Santana didn't mind silence. Rachel, however, wasn't great with it.

"So Brittany told me you were a vocal major in the music department." Rachel stated hoping to find some common ground right away.

"Mmm. Vocal and Piano. You are in the MT department right?"

"I am. I would like to extend a helping hand any time you might need assistance. I have perfect pitch and have managed to, often times unwillingly on their part, help many people from my high school-"

"Shut it down Berry. I'm good in the vocals department. Thanks anyway though." It wasn't like Santana was insecure about her voice. She just already dealt with people in the music department trying to mold her into what they wanted her to be. And mostly she just wanted to do her own thing.

"So... you're pretty infatuated with Brittany." Rachel thought that might be a safe topic.

"Yep." Santana really wasn't making this conversation easy on Rachel.

"She's nice. Kind of weird and private sometimes. I don't know anything about her family. She doesn't even have any pictures up." Rachel knew immediately that they had broached a topic that Santana really didn't want to talk about.

The Latina's first reaction was sorrow. She imagined Brittany didn't have many pictures of her family. Probably just those fancy portraits people take for appearance sake. She wondered if her family had any pictures of her. Her second reaction was to protect Brittany. She wasn't even sure from what. But she knew she didn't like this little hobbit talking about her girlfriend's family.

"Don't talk about her family. Unless she brings it up you do not talk about them." Rachel takes a step backwards away from Santana. She was about to respond when Brittany walks back in and sees Santana staring angrily at Rachel and Rachel with her back pressed against her bed.

"Everything ok?" She asked cautiously. Santana turned and immediately softened.

"Yeah B. Fine. What about this movie?" As Brittany turned to put the DVD in since Rachel hadn't. "I'm sorry Berry. Sensitive topic. No hard feelings?" She felt bad for making Rachel nervous. It didn't seem like she and the diva were the kind of people to be friends but it was obviously important to Brittany that they meet and so she'd do her best to make things not awkward.

"Of course not Santana. Can I hug you?"

"No." She shook her head while releasing a laugh. Rachel didn't take it personally. She just made the decision that she'd get Santana to let her hug her soon.

Santana followed Brittany as she climbed up on her bed. She sat next to the blonde who immediately curled up into her side. The Latina was pretty sure this was going to be a terrible movie. But she had something that would make it worth it. A beautiful girl curled in her lap.

Santana was wrong. After trying to be annoyed by the movie for the first five minutes, she quickly got sucked in. She couldn't help it. She could tell that Brittany was tired though, and she didn't want her to fall asleep in her clothes. "Why don't you change for bed B? Then we can just lay down and finish the movie." Brittany looked up at her and nodded. She was really tired.

Santana went down to the bathroom to change and was reminded why she moved out of the dorms as soon as she could in the first place. Communal bathrooms. Nothing made her quite as nervous as sharing a bathroom with a lot of other females that didn't know about her. She was already nervous about not wearing compression shorts around Rachel, even though Brittany had convinced her that it would be fine and that Rachel rarely noticed things that didn't involve her anyway. When she gets back Rachel is just heading to the bathroom to change.

"I think your roommate is crazy babe." She tells Brittany who just starts changing right in front of her.

"Yeah. Probably. But I kind of like her." She gets no response from the Latina, turning around to figure out why she realizes that Santana can see her naked from the waist up in the mirror. She throws her t-shirt at her. "Perv."

"Can you blame me? No." She wraps her arms around Brittany's naked torso and kisses her once in the middle of the shoulder blades before taking the t shirt that had just been thrown at her and putting it on over Brittany's head. "Put your clothes on I don't want Rachel seeing this. It's all mine." She smiles and pats Brittany on the butt before jumping back onto the girl's bed. Brittany follows her quickly, knocking Santana to her back and kissing her until they hear Rachel coming back in. Santana briefly wonders how long it will take Brittany to fall asleep, and if they can maybe get their lady kisses on after the movie. Just a little.

This idea is quickly put to rest however. As soon as the movie starts, Brittany curls up into Santana's side with her head on her chest. About three minutes later, Brittany is completely passed out. After the movie Rachel gets up to turn the lights out. "Thanks for letting me stay the night Berry."

"Not a problem Santana. She seems to really like you-is she drooling on you?" Rachel manages to cut herself off. Santana looks down and sees a small drool spot forming on her t-shirt.

"Yeah I guess so."

"Aren't you grossed out?"

"No. It happens. If I want her this close, then drool it is." And she does want her that close. She thinks that if it were at all possible for her to sleep all night with Brittany sleeping completely on top of her, she'd do it. As it is, Brittany is half on top of her. It's never more apparently that Brittany is all arms and legs until she has Santana completely trapped. Which Santana doesn't mind at all. Obviously.

"If you say so. Goodnight Santana." She says as she has to jump several times to be able to make it back onto her own bed. Santana laughs and kisses Brittany on the forehead before curling into her even more and falling asleep.

"Da fuck?" Santana mumbles waking up with a start around five in the morning to a strange noise. She couldn't identify it or turn to see what it was because Brittany had her trapped in her endless limbs (she has no regrets).

"It's her routine baby just go back to bed." Brittany kisses her and pulls her tighter.

"Huh?"

"Rachel's routine. Sleep. More. Now." Brittany starts running her hand up and down Santana's back, knowing it's a soothing thing for the Latina.

"So weird." Santana mumbles as she drifts back to sleep.

The next time she wakes up it's to Brittany's alarm. Brittany rolls on top of Santana to turn it off. The Latina circles her waist and prevents her from rolling back over after shutting it off. Brittany leans down to kiss her thoroughly. "Mmmmm good morning to you." She moans into the Latina's mouth. "I don't want to get up."

"Don't." She chases Brittany's lips upwards. "Stay here."

"Don't tempt me. I have class. So do you." Santana nods into the kiss, acknowledging what Brittany said. Then she rolls them gently so that she is on top and leans down to kiss the blonde again.

"Two minutes." She slides her tongue gently against Brittany's who moans into Santana's mouth. After a few more seconds she pulls away. "Mmmm ok we do have to stop now because if we don't, then I'm not sure I'll be able to." She leans down and pecks Brittany's lips once more before pushing herself off of her. They continue to brush kisses against each other as they get ready for the day. Santana thinks that she wouldn't mind waking up like this every morning. Brittany wishes she could wake up like this every morning. And both of them are sad that neither of them know when the next time it will happen is.

Brittany manages to get a good chunk of studio time from 6:00pm till 10:00pm that night. She's grateful as she knows this won't always be the case. When she gets to the studio she locks herself in and starts doing warm ups. She's already decided that, while she feels most comfortable doing hip-hop, that that's not the direction she's going to take. She's thinking something more lyrical. So after warming up, she puts her ipod on random and starts to think about a song. She keeps skipping through until she hits one that makes her smile. She listens to it for a few seconds, thinking that it reminds her of Santana, and then moves on. After a few more minutes of skipping tracks she stops and thinks that maybe she could do the one that reminds her of Santana. She has big feelings for Santana, and that song makes her feel a lot of them. And big feelings often lead her to beautiful dancing. She's not often danced because she was happy, but the idea felt right so she figured she'd try. If nothing came of it, she'd pick a new song.

Santana knew Brittany was at the studio so she wasn't texting her. Even though she wanted to text her. She wanted to see her, and see her dance. But she knew she couldn't so she was watching trashy TV with Mercedes and Kurt instead. "'Cedes are you singing at the talent show?" Kurt asks, eyes still on the TV.

"Mhmm."

"What are you singing?"

"I don't have time to prepare anything so I'm just going with And I am Telling You. And I am telling you I'm gonna kill it." They high fived.

"What are you doing Kurt?" Santana asks. "No, let me guess. Phantom of the Opera with that damn sequence cape you have."

"How did you-I mean no. I'm going to sing Blackbird. It's one of Blaine's favorite songs. What about you Santana? You gonna sing to Miss Brittany huh?" He starts making kissing faces in her direction.

"No! Yes. I don't know. Is it…like if I sing a song about love in it does that mean she'll think I love her? Caus it's too soon for all that." Mercedes looks at Kurt with a raised eyebrow clearly saying 'who does she think she's fooling?'. But they both stayed silent. Santana works through things on Santana's time. They know that. And neither wants to bring out any of her bitchiness. She's been kind of pleasant lately.

"Don't over think it San. You don't have to tell her it's to her, it could just kind of be assumed. Or you could do something else." Santana slumped down into the couch. She just doesn't want to do anything to scare Brittany away.

By Saturday morning Santana is pretty sure she's going through Brittany withdrawal. She misses her so bad. She misses being alone with her. She misses her body pressed against hers. She misses everything. The thing that makes missing Brittany worse is she thinks that Brittany is seriously over working. The only time she's seen Brittany is for lunches, where Brittany eats and does homework with Santana's help. And Thursday night for three hours because Brittany was so behind on homework that she panicked and left the studio to go to the library. She knows that this is how things will be. That it will always be hard for Brittany to make time for her between dance and homework. And truthfully, this is a really easy semester for her but usually she doesn't have this much down time. So she needs to get used to Brittany not being there whenever she wants.

Brittany leaves the studio at 8:00pm and goes back to her room. She's happy with the progress she's made but not very happy with what's happening with the rest of her life. She's behind in homework, she isn't sleeping very much, and she hasn't eaten more than lunch every day since Monday. Not to mention she has barely seen Santana. And not only has she not seen her, but she hasn't really talked to her either. She's scheduled herself to be at the Library from now until she gets her homework done. When she gets back to the room to change she finds Rachel there watching a movie that she doesn't recognize. She waves vaguely in Rachel's direction before setting her stuff down and collapsing on her bed. She just needs a second.

Just before she starts to talk herself into getting up she feels her leg start to cramp up. She knows she's not drinking enough water, or eating enough. But she forgets because there are just so many other things to think about. She reaches down and puts her hands around her calf squeezing hoping to make the pain stop. And then, despite her best efforts not to, she just starts crying. She tries not to make it to obvious, but between the pain and her frustration and just sheer exhaustion her sobs reach Rachel across the room.

Rachel pauses her movie and quickly runs over to Brittany. "What's wrong Brittany? Are you ok? What's going on? Can I help you?" Brittany just shakes her head back and forth and continues squeezing her cramped calf muscle. "Are you hurt do you need to go to the doctors? Do you need ice? I can try to wrap it? Do you want me to sing to you?"

"N-no I'm fine" She starts crying again. "I just. I'm hungry and tired and stupid and I m-miss S-Santana." Rachel sighs. She knows how busy Brittany has been, she knows why it's so important. She's even got to see the progress she's made so far and she was genuinely pleasantly surprised by Brittany's talent. She also thinks that maybe Brittany is over doing it. And that's saying something coming from her.

"I think you need a night off." Brittany starts to nod her head no. "If I had someone that important to me I'd want a night with them especially if I was feeling as uncomfortable as you are."

"She probably has plans."

"Call her?" Rachel sees Brittany's phone on the desk and picks it up, going through her recent contacts she see's Santana's name, hits call and puts it on speaker phone just in case she needs to step in to make Santana not be busy tonight. She can be very persuasive.

Brittany takes the phone and sniffs back a few tears. Rachel rubs her back as they wait for Santana to pick up the phone.

"Hey B what's up? On your way to the library? I can come if you need help." Truthfully Santana just wanted to see her, even if helping her with homework was the only way.

"S-Santana? Can I stay with you tonight." Brittany tries to make it sound like she's not crying, she fails.

"Brittany what's wrong? Are you ok?" Santana's tone turns slightly frantic.

"Yeah. Just tired. I need you." Santana's heart melts a little at those words. She's already walking to the door.

"I will be there in two minutes B. Can you walk down or do you want me to come up?"

"I'll come down. See you soon." They both hang up and Rachel knows she's done a good thing for her friend. She hopes that Brittany thinks of her as a friend.

"Ok let's get you some pajamas ok?" Brittany nods wiping her eyes. Rachel helps her off of her bed and Brittany takes over from there throwing some things in her bag and grabbing her Lopez hoodie. It doesn't smell like Santana at all any more. She wonders if the Latina will trade her for a new one.

"I'm going to walk you down and keep you company in case she's not here yet. Is that ok?" Rachel asks as she opens the door and starts to head out before she even receives an answer. Which Brittany never gives. Rachel is pretty sure that Santana will be there. She probably broke all kinds of rules in order to get here as fast as she could. Santana loves Brittany like that. She really just wants to walk her down because Brittany feels dead on her feet. And she is honestly worried that the girl might fall over or pass out on her way down the stairs.

When she leads Brittany out of the front door she immediately sees Santana sitting in a car. She watches as Santana sees them and then a confused look flash over her face before quickly getting out of the car. She runs over to them and quickly pulls Brittany into her arms who is still sniffling slightly. Brittany's head immediately falls to Santana's shoulder. "Is everything ok?" She asks worried. Brittany just nods her head. Santana isn't totally convinced. She takes her bag from Rachel. "Thanks Rachel." She says. Brittany pulls herself sluggishly away from Santana and turns to her roommate.

"Yeah Rachel. Thank you for calling. You're a good friend." Rachel's face lights up at the word.

"Can I hug you?" Brittany smiles and opens her arms and Rachel hugs her. She then gently pushes Brittany back towards Santana. "I hope your night gets better Brittany. Get some rest." And then turns around and heads back inside.

Santana helps Brittany into the car and throws her bag in the back seat and drives back to her apartment in general silence. Brittany is still a little bit teary eyed and Santana is trying not to let her fear and protective instincts escalate to an unnecessary level. Once they get back to the apartment they go inside, Brittany leaning on Santana heavily the whole way. Once they get back into her room Brittany sits down on the bed, Santana goes and kneels in front of her pushing the hair out of her face. "Please tell me what's wrong B. Did something happen?"

"No." She sniffs. "I am just so tired Santana. And I missed you so bad. I just needed to be around you." Santana continues to brush Brittany's hair out of her face, mostly just for an excuse to keep touching.

"Ok. You're here now. I missed you too." She leans up and kisses her lips, barely letting them touch at all.

"Can I trade you hoodies?" Santana quirks her eyebrow up, confused. "This one doesn't smell like you any more and I miss it." Santana smiles. That's the best reason ever to trade hoodies.

"You can have this one I'm wearing. Put your arms up." Brittany does and Santana goes to pull her hoodie off of the tired blonde, accidentally pulling her tank top off with it. She looks down and hopes she's wrong but is pretty sure that Brittany has lost a visible amount of weight. She knows she's been working hard but the blonde was already thin, she didn't think she could afford to lose any. "When is the last time you ate B?"

Brittany thinks about it. "Lunch? I had cereal. I was late for tutoring."

"Why don't you shower and I'll make us something really quick for dinner? Do you need to borrow pjs?" Brittany nods her head no, that she brought some. Santana helps her up, gives her a kiss, and then sends her to the bathroom. She heads to the kitchen trying to think of what she could make for Brittany. She didn't have much in the way of food. Neither did Quinn. They really needed to go grocery shopping. She opens up the pantry and finds some chicken rice stuff. She pulls it out knowing that she definitely has some chicken too. She goes to work, listening for Brittany to get out of the shower.

Brittany comes wondering in wearing her hoodie and what she's pretty sure are technically underwear but the overwhelming need to take care of the blonde right now wins out over desire. Although she's glad she jerked off today because, well, that ass. Brittany looks a lot better now that she has had a shower. "Can I have a banana?" She asks snapping Santana out of her thoughts. "My leg cramped up really bad in my room earlier, which is what led to the cry fest. I think I need potassium and water."

"Anything you want." She turns to the fridge and grabs two bottles of water. "Here's some water."

"I hope I didn't mess up plans you had for tonight or anything." Brittany says through a mouth full of banana. She didn't realize quite how hungry or thirsty she was. Or how embarrassed.

"Britt. You need me, I'm there. No matter what. Ok? And for the record, all I wanted to do tonight was see you so, everything is working out in my favor anyway. Tell me why you were so upset. What happened."

"Honestly what I already told you. I missed you and was tired but I knew I had to go to the library and I stopped in my room to get my books and I laid down for one second and my leg started cramping. I haven't been drinking enough. Or eating enough I don't think." Santana looks up, Brittany looks kind of embarrassed.

"Well, dinner is almost done. But B, you gotta work on that. Just because you're busy doesn't mean you can stop taking care of yourself ok. Promise you'll try and not let that happen again ok? Bodies don't work right if you don't give them enough food and water. It probably was making you even more tired."

"I promise." Santana goes to reach for the bottle of water that she set out for herself and notices that Brittany has already made it through hers, and halfway through Santana's as well. Brittany smiles sheepishly at her and mouths the word thirsty before taking another drink.

Santana goes back to finishing dinner, while periodically checking on Brittany who is just sitting at the counter with her head down watching her and smiling gently. "What?" Santana wonders why Brittany is watching her.

"I'm just lucky. That's all." Santana blows her a kiss as she reaches for plates and dishes out the chicken rice. "Oh my god this is so good." Brittany moans before taking another huge bite.

"Uh. Thanks? I think. It's just stuff from a box. I didn't really do anything. I need to cook for you for real sometime soon. Maybe Christmas break I'll make you a whole dinner with dessert and everything." Brittany nods still chewing her rice. While the blonde definitely looks better, Santana can tell just how tired she is. "Movie in bed tonight?"

"Yes please. Nothing scary." Santana goes into the living room and picks out something she's sure Brittany would approve of even though she's pretty sure the girl is going to be fast asleep as soon as she gets comfortable. When Brittany finishes they head into the bedroom. Santana does bother leaving the room this time when she changes. Brittany watches Santana remove her bra and stairs openly at her naked chest. "I'm mad that I'm so tired." She practically growls to herself.

"What babe?" Santana turns slipping a tank top over her head.

"I'm just mad that I'm tired. I hate that I literally have no energy in my body. Everything hurts. My abs are killing me. But all I want is to touch you. I want to do things we did last weekend. And I'm sad that I am to tired. And I feel like a terrible girlfriend." Satana takes her hand and pulls her till she's standing.

"You are the most amazing girlfriend in the entire world. You are the only one I ever want. I understand that you're tired. I would love to also touch you but more than that I would love to know that when you go off to the dance studio tomorrow that I did everything I could to make sure you were well rested and feeling better than you did today. Ok? That's what I want. You're busy. I promise there will be times that I'm to busy and we won't have time because of me. That's just how it works when we're both in school. It's no big deal. Now take off the hoodie and get in bed. I wants to get my cuddle on." Brittany kisses her on her full lips and mumbles thank you against them. Santana pulls away and slips the DVD into her computer. The opening screen pops up.

"Finding Nemo? I love this movie!"

"I had a feeling." Santana replies as she turns around noticing that Brittany is now in bed wearing nothing but underwear and a sports bra. Once again the blondes tired eyes however, bring Santana's thoughts back to something more innocent. She shuts the lights off and climbs in behind the blonde and wraps her arm around her waist. She starts lightly stroking Brittany's abs remember that she had said they were sore. "Do you want me to rub your back baby?" No answer. Brittany fell asleep in less than five minutes. Santana buries her nose in the blondes hair and pulls her body in as close as she can. Relishing in the fact that the Brittany is back where she belongs.

After a quick breakfast and a very very brief make out session Brittany left for the dance studio. Santana had, of course, been right. After having eaten a few meals and slept ten hours last night rehearsal was much less terrible this afternoon. After running through her talent show number a few times (she was pretty unconcerned about that) she decides to cut rehearsal short and get in some extra time at the library before going to bed at a decent hour. After dinner. Food. Must eat food Brittany. She thinks Santana would be proud.

As she's rounding the corner towards the door she runs right into someone. "I'm sorry!" She looks up, apologizing to the tall boy she'd just run into. "I should watch where I'm walking."

"Me too. I'm always running into things. My name is Mike Chang. I've seen you around a few times. Are you a new major?"

"Yep. First year. Brittany Pierce."

"Cool. What are you up to hear on a Sunday?"

"Rehearsing my audition piece for the solo for the winter show." She feels a little embarrassed to be talking to another dancer about it, she's not totally sure why. "I know I probably won't get it but I think it's important to try. So I am. Are you auditioning for it?"

"No. My girlfriend said she's hit me if I got in another piece and had to spend more time in this building. She is in the theater department. Costumes. She's pretty awesome. Her name is Tina." Brittany liked the way Mike's face lit up when he talked about Tina. She knew her face lit up when she talked about Santana too. "And don't think you won't get it. You've got just as much of a shot as anyone else here. And the professors are pretty good about not showing favoritism."

"You think? It would be nice to establish myself early."

"Definitely. That's a really good way to think about it Brittany. Hey, I've got to go to rehearsal but let me give you my number, and if you'd like I could maybe take a look at your audition piece before Thursday." He writes down his number and hands it to her. "Just text me your number on your way out."

"Really? Thanks Mike! Have a good rehearsal." He weaves at her as he walks away. He seems really nice, Brittany thinks. She desperately wants friends in the department. She is incredibly glad to be friends with Santana's friends but she wants to fit in here too. She texts him her number and a smiley face and heads to the library to try and make her way through a mountain of homework.

The beginning of the week happens much like last week, where Santana only sees Brittany for lunch. But she's careful about asking her if she's eating and she can tell Brittany is sleeping more. "So I made a friend on Sunday" Brittany tells her at lunch on Tuesday. "He's a sophomore and his name is Mike." Santana tries to not be curious about Mike's intentions with her girlfriend. Brittany can tell what Santana is thinking and looks at her with an amused expression. "And he has a girlfriend in the theater department." She watches Santana let go of the little bit of jealousy she'd been holding.

"Yeah? I should ask Kurt if he knows her. What's her name?"

"Tina."

"Oh yeah he does know her. She helped me make a sequence cape. I might never forgive her for that hideous thing that gets dragged out every time he's drunk." Brittany laughs.

"Well, he's going to watch my audition piece tonight and give me feed back."

"That's great B. Can I watch?" She slips it in there hoping that Brittany will just agree without thinking about it. They'd discussed this several times. Santana really wanted to see what Brittany had been working on, and Brittany wanted to wait to show Santana. If she didn't get the solo, she'd show her next time they had time. If she got the solo, then she'd see it at the winter dance concert. While Santana had accepted these terms, she still tried to trick Brittany once in a while.

"Nice try." The blonde winks at her. When they part ways after lunch Brittany heads to class and Santana heads to a practice room at the music building. She spends the rest of the afternoon working on both songs that she's picked because she still can't just be brave and sing the song she wants to sing to Brittany.

Thursday rolls around and Brittany is a giant bundle of nerves. Santana meets her at the dance building before her assigned audition time to wish her good luck. When Brittany gets inside, the professors all smile at her and tell her to begin. She pushes play and begins to dance the part that she's choreographed so far. After one minute, she stops dancing, the music is shut off, and she says "Thank you." To the professors.

"Thank you Brittany. Now, I know this is your first year. Is that something you did before you came here?"

"No sir. I've been working on it since the day we were told that we could audition for a solo for the winter dance. It's part of the entire piece I would do if you chose me."

"So you've already started choreographing the piece that you don't know you've gotten yet?" Brittany gets nervous. Maybe he thought she was being cocky.

"Ye-Yes sir. I just didn't want to waste any time if I was lucky enough to be chosen. That's all."

"Nice work Brittany. We'll be posting the results on the window at 5:00pm tomorrow. Thank you for auditioning."

And that was it. She walked back out and found Santana sitting on some stairs halfway down the hall.

"All done? That was really short. Did it go ok?"

"I think so? I'll know tomorrow at 5:00, they're posting the results. Oh I won't know till after the talent show actually because we'll already be there by then."

"I can have someone go check for you if you want. Or Rachel would do it I'm sure."

"No. I want to look. I'll wait. Will you go with me to look though?"

"Of course Britt. I was kind of hoping you might want to stay the night tomorrow night anyway. Take Saturday off maybe? Spend some time together." Brittany kisses Santana sweetly.

"Yes. I want that definitely. But in the meantime, I have to spend the rest of the day at the library. I am so behind."

"Ok. I can come with you for now, then I'm going to rehearse with Mercedes and then I can come back."

"Perfect." Brittany texts Mike to let him know that things went pretty well, and to tell him about the talent show in case he and Tina wanted to come.

By 11:00pm Brittany is feeling significantly less behind thanks to Santana (as always) and they decide to call it a night. Tomorrow is going to be a long day anyway.

Mercedes asked them all to meet at the student union at 4:30 the next day so they could make sure everything was ready for the start of the show at 6:00. Brittany found herself getting really excited as she walked down to meet everybody there. She hadn't really done much thinking about it, but the number she was doing wasn't particularly difficult, she had run through it a few times this morning and it went fine. She was excited to get to sing and dance. She didn't sing for people very often, and while she knew she'd never make a career of singing that didn't change the fact that it was fun for her.

When she got there she immediately found Santana and stood behind her with her arms draped over the shorter girls shoulders. "Ok guys we need to come up with an order." Mercedes said to the people performing. "I think we'll have the drag queens to a couple numbers first and then which one of you wants to do your number first?" Nobody spoke up. Brittany wondered why. "Please guys don't make me force you."

"I'll do it." Brittan shot her hand up. She wasn't nervous she wasn't totally concerned with the outcome of the show anyway.

"Thank you Brittany you're an angel." Santana nods as though affirming Mercedes statement and then turns around to kiss her girlfriend on the cheek. After the rest of the order was worked out the all parted ways to eat dinner and make sure the DJ had their music. There were a couple people there that she didn't recognize, some of Sam's friends she assumed as they were talking to him. Then the drag queens showed up. Brittany had the brief thought that she wished she could be a boy just so she could be like them. They were the most fabulous people Brittany had ever seen. Kurt seemed pretty enamored with them as well.

At 6:00pm Brittany looked out into the audience and saw that it was a pretty packed house. Big crowds were always better crowds she thought. She looked over in the corner and saw Santana clutching her cup of tea pacing a little.

"Nervous baby?" She asked, accidently scaring the Latina. Truthfully, Santana was nervous. But more than she was nervous, she still hadn't completely decided on a song.

"Yeah a little. I always am before singing in front of a crowd. Nothing to bad though. It usually goes away as soon as I'm on stage."

"Well I can't wait to watch you. And I gotta go change. See you after I'm done!" She knew she only had about twenty minutes to get changed but that was plenty. Her costume wasn't elaborate. Just a torn up t-shirt and some black bootie shorts and heels. Then she messed up her hair, threw on some glitter (or lets of glitter) and was ready to go. She went to Stage left and the technician clipped the mic pack onto her as she fit the headset onto her head.

Santana stood in position in the audience just off to the side so she had a good view of the stage. When the music started she didn't immediately recognize it until she saw Brittany walk on stage and heard her start to sing Ke$sha's Tik Tok. She watched wide eyed as Brittany popped her bodies in ways that Santana had only ever see on dance shows on TV. She was completely captivated by her girlfriend's moves as she watched her dip lower and even go into a split. She had never been more thankful for her compression shorts in this moment which felt incredibly tight. After her number everyone in the audience cheered but non louder than Santana who quickly ran back stage and jumped onto Brittany pressing their lips together forcefully.

"So you liked?" Brittany asked as she supported the Latina's weight against her body. She could hear vaguely in the background (though she wasn't really paying attention) the drag queens praising her moves. Eventually the girls separated after getting several looks from other people back stage.

"You did awesome. God you're sexy. Did you have fun?"

"Tons. I'm excited to see you now." Mercedes was nailing it out on stage at the moment.

"Oh shit I've got to get dressed. I. well. see. you. in a. little. bit." Each word punctuated with a kiss. After Mercedes comes off and Sam congratulates her she runs off in another direction making sure one of the drag queens wasn't doing shots in the bathroom again.

"You did awesome Britt!" Sam ruffles her already messy hair. "This is my friend Artie. We're doing Stereo Hearts. We're on next." Brittany waves at Artie.

"Excellent I think you guys will be great. I love that song." They exchange more small talk until the drag queens next number ends and the boys get ready to head out onto the stage. Brittany starts to look around for Santana thinking she'd be back soon.

"Wow. You are…You're really hot." She hears a distinctly male voice say in her direction. She turns around and notices one of the guys that was talking to Sam standing there.

"Thanks." She replies.

"I'm Finn. Finn Hudson. And you are…?" She doesn't like the way he's looking at her. She starts to back up away from him.

"Brittany. Are you friends with Sam? He's like my brother." She hopes saying this will get him to stop advancing on her but it doesn't, and to soon she finds her back pressed against the wall and he's still coming towards her.

"You and I should head out. Maybe go back to my place." He puts one hand against the wall over her shoulder and one on her waist. His big hand feels so uncomfortable compared to the small feminine hands she was used to.

"I-I-I have a girlfriend."

"Maybe you just need a real man to show you what you're missing." He presses his pelvis into hers and tears spring to her eyes. She puts her hand against his chest and pushes trying to get him to move away.

"Please stop. Please leave me alone." Tears are running down her cheeks now as he presses himself closer to her.

Sam gets off stage and high fives Artie. Or is it a low five really? Dude's in a wheel chair. Either way. He thinks they did awesome. He looks around for Mercedes but doesn't see her. He looks towards the back wall where he thinks he sees someone. As soon as he focuses in he notices that Finn, some guy in the theater department that just kind of invited himself to this thing, is pressed up against Brittany who is clearly upset and pushing him away. He runs back towards her and grabs him by the back of his shirt and pulls him away from her.

Brittany shuts her eyes tight against what is happening right now. It feels too familiar. She wants it to stop. She's scared and she thinks she's going to be sick when suddenly the oversized man is gone. She opens her eyes and sees Sam step in between them and press her back into the wall. But unlike the scared feeling she had with Finn, now she feels like this is going to be ok. She buries her fists in the back of his shirt to make sure he stays in front of her as she tries to get her tears to stop.

"Man if her girlfriend catches your dumb ass she will kill you. Get the fuck out of here right now and I don't want to ever see you around here again."

"What the hell man she's just a girl I wasn't doing anything wron-" before he could even finish his statement Sam punched him in the jaw.

"Get the fuck out of here now." Finn started to walk away and Sam turned around and hugged Brittany. "Are you ok Britt? What did he do? I will kill him." Brittany was gearing up to explain what had happened when she heard Santana walking towards them.

"What the fuck trouty all up on my woman?" She said in a joking tone. He didn't threaten her. He was like a brother to both of them. The joking ended when she saw the look on Brittany's face coupled with the tear tracks that were made visible by her mascara. "Brittany what happened? Sam tell me what happened." Sam looked nervous to explain and Brittany was shaking. Santana needed an explanation now.

"He's gone now Santana so it's ok." Artie stepped in to try and explain.

"Who's gone? What did they do? Brittany what happened?" Santana was in full on freak out mode now.

"This guy Finn got really handsy with Brittany and didn't stop when she told him no. I got rid of him though." Santana grabbed Brittany and pulled her into her tightly. Then pulled back to look at the blondes face, before pulling her in tighter.

"Britt baby are you ok? Please talk to me. Did he hurt you?"

Brittany shook her head. Feeling herself calm slightly in Santana's presence.

"Sam watch her. I'm going to go kill that fucker." She turned to walk away, not knowing who she was looking for her what direction she was going but it didn't matter because Brittany wasn't letting her go.

"No Santana. Please stay with me. He's gone. Sam busted his jaw. I'm ok. I was just scared. I just, you know." Santana nodded. She did know. "Please don't go. I need you and I want to hear you sing." Santana nodded and then hugged her girlfriend to her body again needing to feel her there as much as Brittany needed to be there.

"I just want to protect you. I'm so sorry I wasn't there Brittany. So so sorry."

"It's ok San. I should have pushed harder, or kicked him or something. I just panicked but Sam was there." Santana could tell Brittany was downplaying the entire thing. And she couldn't stop her brain from wondering what if Sam hadn't been there. Would she have got back in time? Would he have touched her? She can't let herself think of those things because Sam was there. She decides to try and let it go, harboring anger isn't going to help right now. But if she ever sees that fucker again she doesn't know what she will do.

"Ok. I'm here. We're good. Right?" Brittany leans back and wipes a stray tear off of her face and nods at Santana, a small smile playing on her lips. She leans in and kisses Santana. After a few seconds of kissing Santana hears and 'ehem'. She pulls away from Brittany, keeping their bodies pressed together and looks in the direction of the noise. "What?" She says to Mercedes.

"You're on in a minute. Everything ok?" Santana and Brittany walk away while Sam explains what happened.

Santana pulled Brittany into her one last time and kissed her deeply. "Gonna sing for me?" Brittany whispered against her lips.

"I'll do everything for you." She kissed her once more and turned to walk onto the stage at the announcement of her name.

"OH look at this sassy little girl. I like her. She was just off stage necking with her girlfriend. Gasp. Scandal." The drag queen spoke to the crowd, who all laughed. Santana just winked at her and sat down at the Piano that was on stage but off to the side. "So says here you're going to sing a little Adele Hometown Glory for us."

"Change of plans. That beautiful blonde I was "necking with" really who says that? Anyway, that's my girlfriend, and this is for her." Santana had made a decision walking across the stage that she was going to sing to Brittany. She knew she didn't need to be honest, her feelings were honest and Brittany would accept them. "So this is Make You Feel My Love by Adele." Santana said into the microphone as she started to play the familiar tune.

Brittany felt her chest swell with feelings. She wasn't expecting Santana to sing to her, clearly neither was Santana. But her voice was beautiful. It filled the entire room and nobody spoke or even breathed to loud because they were so focused on listening. She looks beautiful, she sounds beautiful, Brittany thinks. She knows she's lucky to have her, but in moments like these she has to remind herself that Santana chose her, which means she must be worth it. Because she doesn't feel like she deserves everything amazing that Santana is.

After Santana stopped singing and the applause started to die down the drag queen walked back out on stage. "Wow. Well, your girlfriend now has a roomful of competition because I think we all might be in love with you now."

"No. No one can compete with her." Santana was watching Brittany just off stage bouncing waiting for Santana to come to her. The Latina thought if she stayed on stage that Brittany might just run on. So Santana waved, and walked off stage only to be practically tackled by her very excited girlfriend.

"I can't even" she pressed their lips together desperately. "You are amazing. Beautiful. Wonderful. You're everything Santana. Just everything." And then they were kissing again. Like last time, she heard an "ehem."

"Bitch you really need to stop interrupting my sweet lady kisses lest you feel my wrath."

Mercedes raised an eyebrow and cocked her hip to the side. "Whatever. After these last two drag numbers they will announce the winners so don't go locking yourselves in the bathroom or something like that." She walks off without waiting for a response and Brittany just laughs.

When the drag queens were done performing and the judges were done counting up scores they called everybody out on stage. "So we have a three-way tie."

The drag queen standing behind Sam slaps his butt and yells "I wanna have a three way tie with you. Mhmm."

"Girl I heard that." The drag queen with the microphone responds. "Anyway, no matter how hard I tried to persuade them to pick a first second and third so we could get some drama, they said they couldn't do it. So. Without further ado. Your winners each receiving fifty dollar gift certificates to the local coffee shop The Fix, as well as 125$ in cash. Sam and Artie with Stereo Hearts." The boys walk up and hug the drag queen and take their prize, Sam gets his ass grabbed again. Mercedes thinks it's hysterical. "Santana Lopez singing Adele's Make You Feel My Love." Brittany started jumping up and down and clapping for Santana. How exciting! She almost missed the final announcement. "And Brittany Pierce, one of the finest damn dancers I've ever seen, singing and dancing to Ke$sha's Tik Tok " Brittany was still celebrating for Santana and was slightly confused when she felt Quinn push her forward. But then she heard the last part of the announcement and walked up to the drag queen. "Before I give this to you, give us one more split." Brittany shrugged and dropped down into a split without even thinking about it, and then bounced back up. The drag queen looked around her at Santana "Damn girl you better hold on to her." Brittany was so excited about everything that she ran back towards Santana and threw her arms around her neck and kissed her in front of everyone. Santana was glad she did.

"Ok after everyone leaves we gotta clean up. Everybody has to stay." Mercedes said as they walked back stage. Brittany had forgot that she still needed to find out who had gotten the solo but decided that a few more minutes wouldn't hurt. Even though she really wanted to go see. Santana saw her face fall a little bit and was also reminded that they needed to check the postings. As much as she hated asking for favors, Brittany was worth it every time.

"Hey Wheezy. Do you think it's possible that Brittany and I leave? She needs to go check and see if she got this dance solo. It's kind of a big deal and I promise I'll make it up to you." Mercedes face softened. She knew the only reason Santana approached her in a mostly respectful way was because she wanted it for Brittany. It's not that Santana was ever really mean. Not to her anyway. She was just not a very genuine person. She hid everything. But now it's like honestly oozes out of her and Mercedes loves this version of Santana. Even though she'll never tell her.

"Yeah go for it. Text us and let us know how it goes."

"Thanks 'Cedes. I will. Brittany doesn't seem too hopeful though. But we'll see!" Santana turned around without a goodbye and grabbed Brittany's hand and dragged her outside.

"Where are we going we have to clean up!" Brittany giggled as she was pulled out into the night.

"No we don't. We have to go check your list. And then we have to go spend some real time together." She knew Brittany's next question before she even asked it. "Don't worry I asked and Mercedes said it was fine." A smile breaks out over the blondes face and she starts to walk quickly to the car. They're both in heels and the last thing either of them needs is a broken ankle. Santana pulls up in front of the dance building and they can both see a white piece of paper taped to the inside of the window facing out. Brittany bites her lip and looks apprehensive.

"What's going on B?"

"Can I tell you something?"

"Anything."

"I know that I shouldn't have got my hopes up but I did. On accident. And it will be ok if I don't get it, which is likely. I just really want it." She looks down feeling a little bit bashful.

"They'd be stupid not to pick you. Now that I've seen you dance for real and all. I know that was a different kind of dance you did tonight but I've never seen someone so in control of your body. It does exactly what you want it to and looks so amazingly beautiful and sexy."

"Sexy? I'm not sexy San. I wear bear hats and shirts with dinosaurs on them."

"Brittany I can't even begin to explain how sexy I think you are. But that is for another time. Maybe in a few hours. But right now, we've got to go look at that list. Come on, I'll go with you." They get out of the car and walk down to the front of the building. Brittany can't make herself look, she's too nervous. Santana doesn't have that problem though. She reads it instantly and then looks over to Brittany. "Just look baby. Get it over with. And then we can go back to my place and do whatever you want."

Brittany takes a deep breath and looks at the sheet. "Me. San that's me. That's my name! I got it! San I did it!"

"You did it! My amazing amazing beautiful talented girlfriend! Look what you did!"

"I did it!" Brittany throws her arms around Santana's neck and squeezes her. "I can't believe I did it! I can't wait to tell everyone."

"You don't have to wait B it's not that late, call everyone now."

"Nuh uh. Right now is us time. I need some us time to let it process." Santana doesn't know that she's ever smiled bigger than she is right now. Her body feels to full of pride and love, she's worried she might explode. They get back into the car, Brittany still muttering about not being able to believe that she did it. Santana can believe it. She thinks Brittany can do anything.

When they get back to the house it's clear that Quinn hasn't come back yet. "We were so excited to get back we forgot to stop and grab clothes and stuff for me."

"You can borrow mine. Perks of being nearly the same size as your girlfriend. We should shower."

"We should." Desire filled Brittany at the thought of a naked Santana in the shower. This time in a completely different context than her being sick.

"You want to go first or me?" Santana replies pulling a few things out of her dressers.

"Could we maybe shower together?" Santana was hit with an instant shot of arousal.

"Like together together? Or like last time together?"

"Together together." Santana nods but finds the words are stuck in her throat so she just takes Brittany's hand and leads her to the bathroom, grabbing two towels on her way. When they get into the bathroom Santana starts the water, feeling for the best temperature. Brittany strips down to her underwear but then finds she's getting impatient and reaches up to the zipper on Santana's dress and slides it down. The Latina stands up straight and turns around to face Brittany. Her breath catches in her throat when she sees that Brittany is standing in front of her in black lace bra and matching panties. "I want to see you." The blonde says quietly as she reaches up to slide the straps of the dress off of the Latina's shoulders.

Santana steps out of the dress and finds herself feeling slightly embarrassed about standing in front of Brittany in her compression underwear. They aren't sexy, and she hates the lines they leave all over her. Brittany, for her part, just reaches around to the back of the her, and runs her hands up from the small of her back to her bra and unhooks it, letting it also fall off of Santana's shoulders. She sucks in a breath as she feels her knees buckle at the beauty of the sight in front of her. She reaches to Santana's hips next, resting her hands there for a brief moment before she starts to pull Santana's compression shorts off. They are incredibly tight and she nearly struggles with them before she gets them to a place where they fall to her ankles. Brittany runs her fingers over the painful looking red lines that also happen to be very close to Santana's cock.

The Latina reaches behind Brittany's back and undoes her bra as Brittany pushes her own panties off eager to get into the shower. Santana takes a moment to glace over Brittany. Not understand how something so beautiful can even exist before she pulls the blonde in and kisses her senseless. They part eventually needed oxygen and Brittany pants, "lets get in."

When they do, something about the shower and the bright lights makes them both feel exposed so they start to slow down. They help each other wash their hair and rinse it. And then Brittany uses the body wash and starts to "clean" Santana's breasts paying special attention to her nipples. The Latina moans into the echoey bathroom, heightening Brittany's arousal. She's not sure what's gotten into her but all she wants is to make Santana feel good. She reaches down with one hand and grabs her semi erect dick and squeezes it gently a few times causing Santana's hips to buck, "Unh Britt" Santana moans. But Brittany wants more. So before either she or Santana can really comprehend what's happening, Brittany is on her knees in front of Santana looking up at her, hand still gently squeezing her. When she had eye contact with the Latina she bent forward and took the still semi soft head between her lips and started to suck gently.

It wasn't long before Santana was completely hard and Brittany started to swallow more of her. She looked up reestablishing eye contact as often as possible. Santana's knew she wasn't going to last long. The visual in front of her is one she'll never forget. Brittany on her knees, mouth bobbing up and down on her cock, hand jerking the base. All the while water runs down her body. "Oh God Brittany." She reaches down and holds onto her other hand that was resting on a tan thigh.

Brittany loves this. She loves making Santana feel this way. She loves the way it makes her feel. If both of her hands weren't presently occupied she would have considered touching herself. She could feel that pressure growing inside of her again only this time she wasn't afraid of it. She wanted it. She swirled her tongue around the head of Santana's dick, flicking her slit repeatedly with her tongue. Santana felt her knees nearly give out and knew would be coming soon. One last look from Brittany, her lips perfectly sealed around her cock, her blue eyes darkened with lust, and that was all it took. It happened sooner than Santana anticipated because she would have warned Brittany. But the blonde swallowed her cum, going back to gentle sucks and licks to the head to work her through the orgasm.

After she was done she pulled Brittany to her feet and pressed her against the wall kissing her deeply. "God the things you do to me. Watching you dance. I wanted to take you right there." Santana growled into Brittany's ear before nipping her ear lobe. She moved down kissing the column of her long neck, laying rows of kisses across her color bone, and down to her breasts. She took one nipple into her mouth sucking hard enough to make Brittany press her hips into Santana's looking for friction.

"San please don't tease. I want you." Brittany's voice was dripping with need. Santana gave her exactly what she wanted. She ran her hand slowly down the blondes toned stomach and slowly down between her legs to cup the blonde who immediately bucked into her hand. "More. Please." Santana was all too happy to oblige. She ran her finger through the blonde's folds, moaning at the moisture she felt there. Doing this to Brittany would never get old. Never.

Brittany continued to buck into Santana's hand searching for the friction her body felt like it needed. When Santana started to finally circle her clit she moaned loudly. "Oh God. Inside. I need you." Brittany reached her own hand down and felt Santana's hand. She held it there as she felt Santana push two fingers inside of her. Brittany moaned deeply, holding Santana's hand still while she adjusted to the feeling. When she moved her hand and placed her arms around Santana's neck, the Latina started pumping into her.

So hot. So wet. She had never had Brittany be this demanding and she loved it. She loved knowing what the blonde wanted. She began to finger her harder as she felt the blonde bracing more and more of her weight on the Latina.

Brittany had no words left. Just guttural noises of pleasure. But she knew if Santana didn't stop she was going to fall over soon so she once again placed her hand over the hand that Santana was fingering her with and stilled it.

"Doesn't it feel good?" Santana panicked slightly. Why did she have to stop? Brittany seemed to like it. She didn't want to stop.

"Too good. Gonna fall over." Brittany's breathing was still uneven and she was so wet she swore she could feel it running down the inside of her legs.

"Let's get out and finish in the bedroom." Brittany nodded. Santana helped her out and they hurriedly dried and brushed their hair before Santana got impatient and pulled Brittany into her room, neither of them bothered to cover up with towels.

When they got into Santana's room, the Latina pushed Brittany up against the wall again and started kissing her with all of the passion she felt. The blonde started to grind her hips into hers again when Santana thought of something. She pulled away from Brittany with a slight pop of their lips and a whine from Brittany as she followed trying to pull Santana back into a kiss.

"Britt, could I maybe go down on you? I want to. Really bad. But if it makes you uncomfortable we don't have to." Brittany swallowed hard and felt her heart rate pick up. She wanted to, she was pretty sure. She wanted everything with Santana. So she nodded.

"But we can stop if I ask right?"

"Always Brittany, always." The kiss that followed was slower, more loving than heated as Santana walked Brittany backwards to the bed, their lips never parting. Brittany lay down and scooted herself back so she was lying on the pillows. Santana turned all the lights off except one in the corner of her room, hoping that the semi darkness would make Brittany more comfortable. "Are you ready baby?" Santana asked gently. Noticing how the tone of this evening had shifted so dramatically. She loved this tone too. Needy Brittany was wonderful, but so was demure Brittany.

She crawled up form the foot of the bed, parting Brittany's legs as she went. Her long legs parted easily, Santana felt no resistance. Had she, she would have stopped. She stretched her body up to kiss Brittany again, feeling the blonde ease even more under the soothing kiss, and touch of her hands. When she felt like Brittany was ready she started to kiss slowly back down her body. Sensing now that there was no need to rush. When she got far enough down she scooted her lower half and lay down between the blondes legs. She began by laying soft kisses all around the soft patch of damp curls. She kissed softly down her lips, careful not to part them. She was waiting for Brittany to become comfortable with this level of intimacy before she went any further. While she kissed, she ran one of her hands over the blonde's abs and down her thigh. When she heard little noises of enjoyment start to come from Brittany, she used her left hand to part her gently, and dipped her tongue in for the first time.

She never wanted to leave. Ever. She had been extremely turned on by the idea of going down on Brittany but the reality was even better. She pressed her tongue against the tight ring of muscle at Brittany's opening, feeling the blonde move her hips lightly encouraged Santana but she wanted to take her time. She nudged Brittany's clit with her nose, enjoying the intake of breath she heard. She ran a light lick from her opening up to her clit and flicked across it a few times before drawing her tongue back in her mouth fully tasting Brittany. It was salty, and tasted exactly how Brittany's arousal smelled. Which was amazing to Santana.

How they hadn't done this sooner Brittany will never know. Somewhere lingering in the back of her mind remained the self-consciousness that she felt earlier about having Santana do what she was doing right now. But it felt amazing. She found it hard to believe the Latina had never done this before. She wanted it to go faster and never ever end at the same time. "Santana" She moaned the other girls name at a particularly well-placed stroke that sent a jolt through her.

On her next pass down she decided to try something new. She began to press her tongue inside of Brittany. The squeak of surprise followed by a moan was a clear indication that the blonde had enjoyed it. She moved her tongue in and out a few times before pulling back out and licking back up to her clit. Brittany sighed at the loss. Santana knew what she wanted and she grinned into her as she slowly entered her with two fingers, while continuing to place small kitten licks to her clit. After a few moments she started to very slowly move in and out while placing her softened lips around the sensitive bud and sucking gently. The resulting scream was encouraging as Brittany accidentally bucked up into her. Santana felt herself growing hard again with the taste of Brittany and the sounds she was making. She pressed herself into the blankets to relieve some of the tension that was building in her as well.

She started to move her fingers in and out faster as she flicked Brittany's clit back and forth with her tongue. "Mmmm uh" Brittany was making nonsense noises now. Just moaning. The only word Santana could really pick out at this point was her name. She continued to grind into the blanket in time with her fingers pulsing in and out of Brittany. She couldn't deny that she wanted desperately to be inside of the blonde but she was also very ok with what she was doing. When Brittany started to pant harder she started circling her clit with her tongue, something she knew Brittany liked when she did with her finger. The blonde tensed up and Santana knew she wasn't far. She continued to do this until she started feeling Brittany shake, which she knew meant that she was just on the edge. Between licking Brittany, listening to her, and the delicious friction of the blanket on her she didn't know that she would last much longer either. She was to turned on to be embarrassed.

When Brittany started shaking Santana once again softened her lips and started to gently suck as she fingered Brittany harder. The blonde's body violently trembled before Santana felt the fingers inside her being squeezed. The blonde arched her back up trying to get as close to Santana as possible. "Sa-an. I'm cu-cumming". Santana moaned onto Brittany's clit. She'd never heard something so sexy in her life. She felt the blonde's walls clenching and unclenching around her fingers. The Latina ground into the bed twice more before she herself started coming again.

Brittany thought something exploded inside of her. She thought maybe something broke. But it didn't matter. It felt better than anything had ever felt before and she never wanted it to stop. When her orgasm started to subside though she felt Santana pull her fingers out and press one more light kiss to her now swollen folds before kissing her way back up her body. The blonde could not catch her breath and her body was still shaking when Santana lay next to her, pulling the shaking sweating body into hers and kissing Brittany with every emotion she felt.

After a few seconds the blondes breathing evened out but she was still shaking. "Cold baby?" Brittany nodded into Santana's chest so the Latina stretched out and worked the blanket from under them and pulled it on top. The action reminded her that she would need to definitely wash it tomorrow. Brittany pressed her body back into Santana's kissing her again.

"I like tasting myself on you." Brittany said before languidly stroking Santana's tongue with hers. She warred with herself briefly between being exhausted from the week and wanting this night to never end. She pressed herself in tighter, wondering if the Latina would make that decision for them. She expected to feel Santana's hard appendage pressing into her belly but she didn't. She pulled away from Santana quicker than she meant to. "Did you not like it?"

"Wait what?"

"Doing that. Oral. Being down there. Because you're not hard and I thought that maybe you would be." Santana's eyes went big for a moment and then looked down. She was kind of hoping she wouldn't have to tell Brittany about that event because it was kind of embarrassing.

"No. I really liked it. Like really really. I'd do it again, often, preferably. I liked it so much I" she sighed. "I came. Already. From pressing myself into the bed. I was just so turned on I couldn't help it." The idea of Santana being so turned on by her that she came without being touched was extremely sexy to Brittany.

"God that's hot Santana." The Latina had been expecting laughter so when she heard Brittany voicing breathy approval, she let go of her embarrassment about the issue. They fell into a comfortable silence. Santana thinking about what they had done, and Brittany thinking about something they had yet to do.

"Santana." She said quietly. Santana made a noise indicating that she was listening. "I just wanted you to know that I really like doing that stuff too. What I mean is" She took a deep breath. She wanted this thought to come out as clearly as possible. "I love when you touch me. I want it, even when we aren't together. I don't I had ever really been turned on before you and I'm glad it's you that got me to feel it. I love how close to you I feel when you're touching me or I'm touching you. And I want you to know that me not being ready to have sex with you isn't about you. I'm almost ready. I just need a little more time to retrain my brain to thinking about sex in a good way. Everything so far has been amazing and I don't want to ruin it by doing it to early. But soon. I feel myself wanting it. And I think that's a good sign that I'm almost ready." Santana swallowed back her emotions. These were good things Brittany was saying and she did not want to let herself get caught up in negative feelings of remember why Brittany is uncomfortable, or afraid of sex in the first place.

"I'm glad that you want to, I do too. Any way I can be close to you on a deeper level, I want it. I want to make you feel good like that. I want it to be something that is amazing. I want to make love to you." She barely stutters on the world love. Brittany doesn't react at all, Santana believes this is a good thing. "But I do want you to know that I would wait forever. If I had to, I would."

"Oh no it definitely won't be forever. There's no way I could resist you for that long." Brittany replied. Then she yawned a huge yawn, knowing that she was fighting a losing battle of being tired.

"Go to sleep babe. You've had such a big week." Santana kissed the blonde again before cuddling down closer to her. Not long after she felt Brittany's breathing even out which is a sure sign that she's sleeping. Santana followed by only a few minutes, both of them completely exhausted.

In the room down the hall Quinn had her IPod headphones plugged in and the volume turned up high trying to drown out the sounds that she had been hearing all night. She was trying not to be angry, and was trying even harder to pretend that she wasn't ecstatic about her best friends happiness.

* * *

**AN 2:** To clear up a few things that have been showing up in reviews. No Beth never happened. Brittany does have an older sister, for sure. I know that got confusing because I'm an idiot but she does have an older sister.

Santana's brothers will be back. Promises.

I'm changing my mind due to a great point made by one of my readers about my decision to put them in school at NYU. So now they are in school in New Jersey at Rutgers. I don't know if that school has all of the programs or facilities that I talk about in this story, I literally know nothing about the school, it's a location thing.

OK. I think that's everything.

Thoughts and feelings?


	11. Chapter 11

The next morning when Santana wakes up she finds herself in the same position as she was last night, with a very naked Brittany pulled into her. She tightened her arm slightly, not enough to wake Brittany but enough to satisfy the urge to hold her tighter. She knew Brittany would have to spend a lot of time and focus on her work for the dance concert, but she hoped that they'd have this weekend to spend a little more time together. She wondered briefly if anyone had ever made Brittany breakfast in bed. Which, she decides, is stupid to think about and very unlikely. So Santana decided she would. The dilemma being could she force herself to extract herself from a very naked, very beautiful woman in order to get up and cook? She didn't want to, but she really wanted to make her smile. So she gently removed her arm, and kissed her between her shoulder blades pulled up the covers and got out of bed. She remembers with a grimace that she definitely needed to wash her bedding. She thinks she should maybe be ashamed of herself, but she can't help but think anyone might cum watching Brittany come undone like that. Yeah, she doesn't have it in her to be ashamed.

Brittany scrunches her nose in her sleep and rolls over onto the side Santana had previously been occupying and pulls her pillow to her chest. Everything Brittany does makes her heart feel like it's going to burst in the best way. Then a thought hits her, she doesn't want Brittany to wake up with her not in bed and think even for a second that she left her. So she leaves a note right next to her. Shorts and a sports bra later and she heads to the kitchen. Unconcerned if Quinn sees her in this state of undress, as this is typical attire for her when they're both home. She loves that she doesn't need to hide herself, or even think about hiding herself here.

Just as she's mixing pancake mix in the bowl she hears someone shuffle in. She only half hopes it's Brittany, still wanting to bring her breakfast in bed. She looks up but it's Quinn. "You look tired Q." Quinn stops shuffling and glares at her and shakes her head.

"I'm happy for you. I really am. Ecstatically happy even. But you guys seriously have to learn to be quieter. Specifically Brittany has to be quieter. Or you guys have to do it in the morning when I'm already awake. Or when I'm not home. Or anything. Really anything. But if I have you hear your name screamed through the wall one more time I'm coming in there and spraying you both with cold water." Santana stopped stirring the mix sometime in the middle of Quinn's rant.

"I didn't think of that."

"Obviously. It's ok. And like I said, I'm honestly happy. I just don't want to hear how happy she is. In the middle of you pounding her. Or whatever."

"I wasn't-"

"Not the point San! What you were doing is definitely not the point and also something I don't want to hear."

"Ok. We will be better about it. Can you just not talk to Britt about it? I don't want to embarrass her. I'm used to you being embarrassing." Quinn laughed and punched Santana in the arm.

"You got it. And try to wipe that stupid smile off your face every time you say her name."

A sound somewhere else in the apartment pulls Brittany into consciousness. She wasn't sleeping very deeply. She squeezes her arms around…not Santana. She opens her eyes and notes that Santana is definitely not there. She's not panicked, or sad, she just misses her face. She rolls over and stretches and her hand hits something not blanket. She pulls a note closer to her face. "Making you breakfast in bed. But I didn't want you to wake up and think I didn't want to still be here with you." Signed with a heart. Brittany pulls it to her chest. She gets up and throws on a pair of Santana's boxers and her tank top and wanders into the kitchen where she sees Santana cooking and talking to Quinn.

Santana hears Brittany first and looks over to her and her face lights up. "Morning baby. Sorry I didn't get to bring it to you in bed but breakfast is almost finished." Brittany skips over and throws her arms around Santana's neck and kisses her innocently.

Quinn watches the interaction and feels a little like she's intruding. She watches Santana hold Brittany like she's the most precious thing in the world. She think to Santana, Brittany might be just that. She hops off the counter and is about to head back into her room when Brittany catches sight of her and breaks away from Santana and throws her arms around her.

"Morning Quinn!" Quinn hugs her back, because why not? And because she's pretty sure Santana would hit her if she refused Brittany a hug. But then she started thinking about everything she heard last night and pats Brittany awkwardly. She catches a look from Santana, one that clearly says 'you better not be thinking about my girlfriend and her sex noises while you hug her'. Or maybe Quinn was imagining it. But probably not.

They all sit down to eat breakfast together and Santana remembers yesterday and is filled with pride. "Brittany tell Quinn the good news!" Brittany swallows her pancake and looks at her for a second before remembering what Santana was talking about. Because at first she thought she was talking about after the shower, but she was fairly certain Santana didn't wan to talk about that at breakfast with Quinn.

"Oh! Quinn I got a solo in the winter dance concert!"

"That's a big deal Brittany! Are we celebrating? We could have a party here tonight!" Santana nods enthusiastically.

"We can if you guys want." But Brittany sounds less enthusiastic with her response.

"Babe it's about what you want. We're celebrating you."

"It's just that I'm still kind of tired." Quinn shoots a raised eyebrow at Santana who is obviously ignoring her. "And I know we're going to be getting busier soon so maybe if we just did a movie night? Maybe some wine. I just don't want to do too much. Is that ok?"

"Definitely B. We can invite Sam and 'Cedes. And Kurt and his boy. Anyone else?"

"Maybe Rachel?" Santana hesitantly nods. She really isn't that bad she guesses. "And Mike and Tina?"

"Text them. We'll go out and get snacks and stuff. You get to pick the movie." She grabs Brittany's empty plate and kisses her on the mouth. "Mmm syrupy." Quinn rolls her eyes and thrusts her plate at Santana who just winks at her.

"I'll text the people I know if you'll text the others Brittany." Quinn offers. Brittany nods and sends a text to the other three. She had just barely sent it when she received a reply from Rachel that made her laugh.

"What'd they say babe?" Santana asks.

"Rachel just texted back. It says; should I bring finger sandwiches and what might the dress code be?" They both laugh and she texts Rachel back.

To Rachel: Comfy clothes. No finger sandwiches please.

She and Santana continued laughing while the final dishes were put in the dishwasher. Brittany got up and began going through the cupboards mentally noting snacks they might need to get. She hopped up on the counter and sat there waiting for Santana to finish cleaning. As soon as she did, she came and stood between the taller girls legs, grabbing her behind the knees and pulling her into her body. "I'm so proud of you B. I don't think I can say it enough. You are amazing." She looks up into Brittany's eyes adoringly. Brittany leans down and presses her lips softly into Santana's and holds herself there for a moment before wrapping her arms around her neck and deepening the kiss. They parted but left their foreheads pressed together enjoying the closeness.

Quinn came back in and witnessed the interaction. She watched the way Santana looked into Brittany's eyes. Reverent. That's the best word she could come up with. The best part was that, as far as she could tell, Brittany felt the same way. She had reservations, not specifically about Brittany but about any girl claiming interest in Santana. But this, and Brittany in general, felt so honest. She trusted it. Some small part of her was a little jealous but the bigger part was just happy for her friend.

"We should shower and get going to the grocery store." Santana patted Brittany's naked thighs. Brittany giggled and wrapped her legs tightly around her back.

"Carry me!" She laughed. And much quicker then she anticipated Santana pulled her off the counter and wrapped her arms tightly around her so she wouldn't fall. Brittany screamed and tightens her hold. "San don't drop me!"

"I won't baby. I promise. You barely weigh anything." And she didn't. Not really. Santana was always slightly surprised how tiny Brittany's frame felt pressed against her. She made it to the bedroom and deposited her onto the bed gently and pressed her lips to her laughing girlfriend's. "Shower together or separate?"

"Mmmmm how much time do we have?" Brittany nuzzled her nose along Santana's cheek.

"Not long. But I can behave myself if you can."

"I can try." Brittany laid gentle kisses along Santana's jaw. Santana pulled herself up and they both went to the bathroom. She started the shower and pulled her clothes off and got in, not oblivious to Brittany staring at her naked body. The blonde steps in behind her and wraps her arms around her. Santana looks down at the pale hands flattened against her tan stomach. She rotated in her arms and put her arms around Brittany's neck trying desperately not to focus on the way their wet bodies slipped deliciously together, or to think about what had happened after last night's shower.

Brittany was having similar problems as she felt Santana's mostly soft dick pressed against her. She wanted to touch her. She wanted to be touched. But she also really liked the tenderness of the moment. And while even the thought made her feel a little stupid, but the idea that they could be naked together and do things like this and it not always be about sex was exciting. So she leaned down and kissed Santana gently. When they parted Santana asked "Can I wash your hair?" Brittany bit her bottom lip and nodded.

After the shower, which was mostly tame save for a few kisses that went on longer than intended, they got dressed. Brittany walked over to Santana's closet and grabbed a hoodie without asking. She pulled it on and then realized what she'd done and sheepishly looked back at Santana who just nodded her head. "Pretty soon you're going to have all of my hoodies. I'm going to have to start taking yours. It's ok they look better on you anyway." Brittany mentally noted to bring Santana one of her hoodies. She wishes she had one with her last name on it so she could give that one to Santana. "How do you make sweat pants look good? My girlfriend is beautiful." Santana said before wrapping her arms around Brittany once more.

"What a coincidence. My girlfriend is also beautiful. Actually the most beautiful ever." Santana bashfully pressed her face into Brittany.

"Come on sap we gotta go grocery shopping."

When they get back from grocery shopping Quinn is just finishing vacuuming the living room so they put the groceries away. They had slept late so it was already close to when people were going to start showing up. Brittany had been fielding random questions from Rachel all afternoon and was pretty hopeful that everything was going to go ok with that. She really wanted her friends to like Rachel enough to at least let her continue inviting her to things.

Brittany finished helping Quinn in the living room when she saw Santana bringing in an armful of blankets as big as her. "What are you doing babe?"

"Making us a bed to cuddle during the movie. I wants to get my cuddle on." Brittany loved how serious Santana was as she watched her lay down layer after layer of blankets. "Ok. Our spot. Claimed."

"Dork." Quinn coughed as she walked past her into the kitchen.

Before to long people started to show up. Sam and Mercedes brought the wine and congratulated Brittany on her getting the dance solo. Mike and Tina came and everyone laughed as Mike and Brittany jumped around like teenage girls about the solo. Mike promising to help Brittany as much as she needed. And after introductions, Tina offered to help Brittany with her costume. Blaine and Kurt showed up and talked to Tina about things going on in the department. Finally someone knocked at the door and Brittany assumed it was Rachel.

When she opened the door Rachel was standing there looking, much to Brittany's surprise, slightly nervous. "Hello Brittany, thank you for inviting me to tonight's activity. Am I late? I got a little bit lost."

"You're fine Rach. Everyone is already inside. You might know some people. They are in the same program as you I think." She led her inside and it turns out she did know Blaine, who introduced her to Kurt and Tina. Tina introduced her to Mike and everything seemed to be going pretty well. Santana was in the kitchen wrestling with a wine bottle still it seemed. She thought about going to help her when both she and Quinn entered.

"Yo tiny. You made it." Santana said by way of greeting as she passed her and took Brittany's hand.

"Oh Rachel. You need to meet Quinn. She's Santana's roommate." Brittany pulled Rachel and Santana over to Quinn. "Quinn this is my roommate Rachel. Rachel, Quinn." Both Brittany and Santana noticed the way that Quinn's eyes widened slightly and she swallowed several times in a row before reaching her hand out for Rachel to shake.

"I I am Quinn. But she said that. Sorry. Hi. Can I get you anything at all? Wine. Food. Anything?" Quinn rambled nervously. Behind Rachel, Brittany and Santana just continued to watch the interaction with confusion, both heads cocked to the side. Santana, for her part, had never seen Quinn act like this before. Could she possibly…no way. Santana thought.

"I'm fine. Thank you Quinn. And thank you for having me over. I'm really excited to hang out."

"Me too. Excited. I mean. Did someone pick the movie yet?" She starts looking around slightly frantically to stop herself from babbling at Rachel "Who picked the movie?"

Brittany steps in to save her. She has figured out that Quinn is definitely crushing on her roommate, which she thinks is adorable but slightly confusing. She wasn't sure Quinn swung that way, but I guess no labels means she's open to anything, and it's Rachel. Who has the sex appeal of a kitten in her opinion. But everybody has their thing. Kittens must be Quinn's. Or…whatever. "I picked the movie. We're watching Camp. It's about performing arts summer camp." They all start settling down and taking their seats.

"I haven't. But I have been to several Performing Arts summer programs so I am interested to see how accurately they depict them. I actually started summer programs at the age of five, which is fairly young comparatively but talent knows no age limits you know." Kurt nodded and then started to talk about his performance history, which launched Rachel into another rant.

"This is going to take a while. I'm getting the wine." Santana kissed Brittany's temple and got up and headed to the kitchen. Brittany looked around the room and noticed that Mike and Tina were looking at something on Mikes phone, and Sam was looking at Santana's movie collection. Mercedes, Blaine, Rachel, and Kurt were wrapped up in conversation, which mostly consisted in them trying to talk over each other. Quinn was paying rapt attention to every word Rachel said. She looked ridiculous actually, Brittany thought. Nodding and wide eyed every time Rachel said anything. Rachel beamed with delight at the attention she was being paid. And maybe a little at just being around people who didn't appear to find her annoying. Except for Santana.

"Barbara junior, how do you talk so much without breathing?"

"I have excellent breath control Santana I thought that you as a singer would know a-"

"It was a joke. No dissertation needed. Thank you. Frodo called though, said he and the other hobbits, your people, miss you." Brittany snorted into the wine glass Santana had handed her.

"San that's mean."

"I am well aware of my stature Santana, thank you for continually pointing it out. Anyway, as I was saying I won my first monologue competition at the age of-"

"We're never starting the movie." Santana said as she dramatically flopped back onto the blanket pile she and Brittany were sitting on.

"Shut up Santana let her talk." Quinn hissed through clenched teeth. "Go ahead Rachel, you were how old?" She said sweetly and goes back to paying rapt attention to Rachel. Santana thought that Quinn had never been more obvious in her life.

"Q. I need you to help me in the kitchen real quick."

"Can't Brittany help? I'm busy."

"No you aren't. And no she can't. Kitchen. Now." Quinn reluctantly got up, made easier only by the fact that Kurt had shifted the focus to him, and she had no real interest in what he was saying. They went into the kitchen. "Oh my God. Q, do you have the hots for the little jew-Berry?"

"Don't call her that." Quinn snapped as she started shuffling things on the counter around.

"But you do. You're crushing on Berry!" Santana says, trying to keep her voice down, but her amusement shines through.

"How could I not? Have you seen her?" Quinn throws herself into a chair at the table.

"Uh. Quinn, have you seen my girlfriend? Other women don't even exist comparatively. Plus how can you see past the giant wall of sound that appears because she literally cannot keep her mouth shut. She's annoying."

"She's not annoying! She is…passionate. And verbose! And Beautiful." Quinn says with a sigh. Santana fights the laughter down.

"Whatever you say Q. Try sitting next to her."

"And torture myself? She's probably straight. She probably has a boyfriend." Santana thought that people only pined like this in movies. Ok, maybe she did a little over Brittany but mostly that was silent or in the form of sappy love songs in her room or in the practice studio. Quinn was being ridiculous.

"She's not straight. She doesn't have a boyfriend. I'm actually pretty sure she's never even been kissed." Quinn's eyes snap up to Santana.

"Really?"

"Yeah Q. Just sit next to her or something. But I'm going to start this movie because this side of you makes me want to puke a little bit." Santana winks at her to let her know she's joking, and grabs the bottle of wine and goes back into the living room.

When she gets back out there, she manages to silence people enough to agree to put the movie in, and notices when Quinn comes back in and sits a very safe, very platonic distance away from Rachel. But on the same couch at least.

After the movie and several bottles of wine between them, she's got a very pink cheeked Brittany snuggled up to her. She reluctantly gets up, and helps Brittany up to say goodbye to everyone. Rachel, who hadn't drunk anything, thanked them for inviting her. Then she went up to Quinn and thanked her as well.

"Thank you for having me Quinn. I really enjoyed myself."

"Uh. Thank you. I mean. You are welcome. We should maybe hang out sometime if you wanted. I know you're busy and but yeah. Maybe? I could give you my number or something. Or you could-"

"Ok! Let me put your phone number in my phone and I'll text you so you have mine!" Rachel pulls out her phone.

"I like your pink. I mean your phone. It's pink." Quinn internally curses herself. "I like it." She finishes lamely. Santana is bighting her fist to keep from laughing. Brittany is just draped over Santana half focusing on the situation. Half kind of asleep but both halves were very happy, she decided.

"Thank you! I put the gold star on it myself. Stars are kind of my thing. Ok I've texted you. I must get going though, I have signed up for an early session in one of the practice rooms! Thank you again!" She waves as she leaves and Santana shuts the door behind her.

"Sanny I'm like a koala." Brittany mumbles as she continues to follow behind Santana still draped over her, sort of walking, sort of being dragged.

"You are the prettiest koala I've ever seen. We'll go to bed soon I just got to make fun of Quinn real quick." The walk over to Quinn.

"She's perf- I've got to go journal." Quinn gets up and runs into her bedroom.

"Never mind then. Bed time for us boo. Give me your legs." She pulls Brittany's legs around her so that she's giving Brittany a piggyback ride. She dumps Brittany on the bed who starts giggling.

"Good wine."

"I figured you liked it. You had a lot of it. It was a very fancy bottle of two buck chuck." She joked. "Want to put PJS on or are you ok like this?"

"Pull my pants off."

"My pleasure." Santana pulled the sweat pants off that Brittany had been wearing, leaving her in her boy short underwear. "Ok sit up." She pulled her up and pulled off the hoodie. Brittany then, in a way that seemed way more complex than it needed to be, removed her shirt leaving her in just a sports bra and her underwear. Santana was quickly finding out that this was Brittany's preferred sleep ware and was slightly ashamed that she had the brief thought that she hoped Rachel didn't get to see her like this. It wasn't a crippling sort of jealousy she had, she just couldn't help wanting to be the only person who knew Brittany as well as she did, and, yeah, got to see her half naked. Or naked at all. All nudity reserved for her eyes only.

"You. Boxers. Sports Bra. Cuddle. Now." Brittany demanded as she crawled under the covers. Quick to please her, Santana undressed to the desired state, noting that she hadn't put on her compression shorts at all that day. She simply forgot. It was nice. She crawled under the blankets and took Brittany into her arms. "I think I want to use the money I won to take us on a nice date. After things are less crazy maybe." Brittany sleepily admitted into Santana's chest.

"Yeah I was thinking the same thing. Actually my brothers gave me some money under the orders that I take you on some nice dates. They really like you."

"Good I like them too." Brittany mumbles.

"I was thinking maybe we could combine the winning money, and the money from my brothers and after the dance concert, we could get a hotel in New York City. Maybe go to a fancy dinner or something. It's fall break starting the weekend after the concert so it's perfect. Unless you were wanting to celebrate with your friends or something, I would understand completely."

"Nope. Just you. I want to celebrate with you. That sounds perfect." She whispered. And then in a less dreamy voice, "And then I guess I can just fly out of New York to go home." Santana had forgot that Brittany would have to go home over breaks. She hadn't thought about it at all really. But the idea of Brittany going back to those people, back to a place where it was very likely he would be, did not sit well with her. She'd have to talk to her mother, see if maybe she could bring Brittany home with her this break. If not, maybe her and Brittany could spend it together here at her apartment. She wasn't sure. But she was sure that if Brittany didn't want to go home, then she'd do everything she could to help make it so she didn't have to. She nearly brought it up to Brittany but she notices her breath evening out, and body lose all tension. A definite sign that she had fallen asleep. She'd talk to her about it another time.

The next few weeks flew by. Brittany was busy with the dance concert, Santana was working as the rehearsal pianist for the theatre department for some extra money and mostly a way to take up time that Brittany wasn't available. They continued rigorous study sessions at the library in an effort to keep Brittany's grades up. One night while lying on the couch exhausted as she often was, Brittany brought up Halloween plans.

"There's usually this huge Halloween block party that happens. And then tons of house parties. Everyone usually does that." Brittany nods into her chest. "What do you want to be for Halloween?" Brittany just shrugs. "Hey Q any Halloween ideas?"

Quinn sets her book down and thinks for a second. "We have those old cheerleading uniforms the coach was getting rid of that we took. We could do something with those. Like zombie cheerleaders! I know we have at least three. Me you and Britt could do that!"

"We could call ourselves the Unholy Trinity." Brittany mumbles, eyes still closed but smiling. "I like it."

"That's bad ass B." Santana comments as she strokes her hair.

"Tina would probably help us with makeup. Could they come too? They are gonna be vampires."

"Definitely. What's short stack doing for Halloween Quinn? Made any progress there?"

"No." She sighs. "I just can't get up the nerve to say anything about feelings. But we've hung out a few times. It breaks my heart that she doesn't have many friends. But I guess her Blaine and Kurt have hung out a few times. I just don't want to seem over eager by asking her to hang out all the time."

"Move on it Q. She obviously likes you. Is she coming with us on Halloween?"

"No unfortunately. Her, Blaine, and Kurt are going to some guys party."

"Mike and Tina mentioned it but said they weren't going. It was going to be way to show tunes for them, were Tina's words." Brittany recalled.

"Well either way we'll probably see them out. I know Sam and Mercedes were planning on going to a couple different places too. Come on baby lets get you to bed." Brittany nodded and hauled her sore exhausted body off of the couch and into Santana's room. They'd been spending increasingly more nights together. Brittany found she slept better with Santana and her mind raced less. Santana was just glad for any time they got to spend together even if they were almost always eating, studying, or sleeping.

When the day of the Halloween block party came, the three of them, Tina and Mike decided to get ready at Santana and Quinn's apartment. After an hour and a half of pregaming, makeup, and costumes they headed out into the streets. Santana and Brittany were well on their way to drunk by time they got to the main area of the block party. After spending an hour there, they decided to go to one of the house parties since they couldn't drink at any of the bars hosting the block party. When they get there, Santana makes them some drinks from the alcohol littering the counter and brings them back to the group who are all dancing in what must have been the living room at one point.

After a few drinks they are all officially drunk. Mike and Tina are dancing a few feet away, and Quinn is leaning against the wall watching her friends and drinking, wishing she were with Rachel. Santana and Brittany were dancing really closely when Santana feels Brittany pulling away. Brittany starts taking her top off, eyes locked on Santana. She notices that lots of other people are starting to watch but Brittany only has eyes for her and doesn't notice. Or doesn't care. Brittany is very clearly a stripper drunk. Santana is torn. On one hand, she'd love to see a topless Brittany right now. On the other, all of these people would see Brittany topless. Her Brittany. Topless. People watching. Thinking bad thoughts about Her. Brittany. Tears begin to well up in her eyes.

Quinn immediately recognizes what's about to happen. She hadn't known Brittany was a stripper drunk, but she definitely knew Santana was an emotional one. And she was going to start crying any second. She pushed away from the wall headed in her direction but before she could get there, she watched Brittany take a near weeping Santana into her arms and pull her off to the side. Quinn walked up behind Brittany and resecured her top just to do what she could to help the situation.

"What's wrong baby? Why are you crying?"

"I just don't want other people looking at you. You are mine. And they all want to take you." Santana cries pathetically.

"I am yours. And nobody can take me. Just yours. Always."

"Always?"

"I hope so."

"Me too." Santana sniffs and hugs Brittany tighter. "I think I should stop drinking."

"I should stop too maybe. Want to go home?"

"Not yet. Let's just hang out for a little ok. But keep holding my hand." Santana tightened her hold on Brittany's hand to emphasize her desire.

"Wouldn't dream of letting go." Brittany responded by tightening her grip as well.

They walked back over to Quinn who was finishing yet another drink. She noticed that neither girl was drinking their drink so she thought maybe she'd do that for them as well. Several minutes later, Quinn was sufficiently drunk, drunker than Santana has ever seen her and she's interested to watch this play out. "I love her. I love her sweaters and her skirts and her face and her hair and her mouth and her headbands Santana. I love her." Quinn claims as she sways against the wall. "I need to find her. I need to quest to find Rachel Barbara Berry" She yells over the crowd and heads off clearly on a mission. Santana runs to catch up and Brittany tells Tina and Mike they're leaving, they follow along. This is going to be good Santana thinks as she catches up.

They get to the house that Rachel, Kurt and Blaine had said they'd be at and judging by the rather loud version of Over the Rainbow that they could hear from two houses away, they're correct. They go inside and find Rachel almost immediately. She's drinking a Smirnoff ice standing next to Blaine who looks decidedly sober.

"Berry I had no idea you were such a lush." Santana comments as they approach the two.

"Santana I'll have you kn-" hiccup "ow that I…" she looks around. "This tastes pink!" She exclaims and takes another drink.

"It's her third. She's completely drunk, it's hilarious." Blaine comments good-naturedly.

Santana looks around for Quinn who is just watching Rachel with a dopey expression on her face. She seemed to have lost the bravado that led them here in the first place. "Gonna talk to her Q?"

"Yeah. Yeah. I am." Quinn nods and walks up to Rachel who immediately throws her arms around her.

"QUINN! I was hoping you'd come! I'm so glad you're here! I am." Rachel hugs tighter before letting go. Brittany thinks Quinn looks a little like she might throw up on Rachel.

"I want to kiss you." She blurts out. Word vomit, Brittany was half right she decides. Rachel's eyes go wide.

"Oh ok. I've never kissed anybody." Santana did an internal victory dance. Quinn was going to lay down the moves and stop pining over Berry. Any second now. But instead, she watches as Quinn's lower lip starts to quiver. And then the floodgates open.

"I am so sorry! I can't. I'm such a bad person. I didn't even mean to I have so many feelings and I just have all these impure thoughts about deflowering your mouth with my mouth and you probably hate me!" Quinn slurs and sobs at the same time. Santana notes that zombies look ridiculous when they cry. Rachel looks unsure what to do so she does the only thing that makes sense to her malt beverage addled brain and leans up and places a chaste kiss on Quinn's tear dampened lips, effectively shutting her up. Which they are all grateful for. Quinn touches her lips and smiles.

"Ok Drunky Brewster we need to get you to bed." Santana says taking Quinn's arm and preparing to drag her home.

"WAIT! I need to- can I? Can I hold Rachel's hand? Just for two minutes." Santana looks around and finds Brittany and mouths what the fuck to her. Brittany just laughs and mouths let her back. She lets Quinn go who walks over to Rachel with her head bent to her chest and holds out her hand hoping that Rachel will take it. Who does, of course. They all stand there in very awkward silence as Rachel stands there holding Quinn's hand, looking up at her. And Quinn is looking at Rachel like she's just won the best prize ever. Santana can't help but think it's cute. In the lamest way possible.

A few minutes later Santana realizes that there really is no natural conclusion to this awkward moment brought to you by fucking tequila and Smirnoff so she finds a subtle way to end it. "Fabgay. We've got to go. You're drunk as fuck." She hopes for a second that Brittany won't be upset with her but she hears her laugh and that's all the answer she needs. Santana goes to pull Quinn away from Rachel and they just hold tighter. Blaine steps in and grabs Rachel and helps pull her in the opposite direction.

"Goodbye Rachel! Par-"hiccup "ting is such sweet" hiccup "sorry but I" hiccup "forget the rest."

"Did she just quote Shakespeare?" Blaine asked. "Yeah you better get her home."

They pull Quinn out of the party and walk her home. She becomes quiet as they leave and lets the two other girls pull her home. When they get there Santana sets her up with a bottle of water, some aspirin, and a puke bucket on the couch, after helping her clean off her makeup.

"Why my bed?" Quinn mumbles.

"Because we have hard wood floors out here and if you puke on it, you'll thank me when you don't have to clean it out of the carpet. Goodnight Q." She kisses her on the forehead and walks back into the bathroom and cleans off her own makeup before heading to the bedroom. Brittany is already undressing and climbing into bed in just her underwear. "I wish I could take advantage of how close to naked you are right now but I'm so tired and I think my shoulder is numb from supporting Q for that last half mile."

"Sleep now. Sexy times another day." Brittany mumbles. Santana nods peeling off her compression shorts and sliding a pair of boxers on. She climbs in next to Brittany who immediately climbs half onto her naked chest. She traces her fingers along the sore lines left by the shorts hoping to sooth them a little. They both are too tired to talk much. But just before they both fall asleep Santana chuckles. "I can not wait to make all kind of fun of Quinn tomorrow."

"Be nice San." Brittany responds before kissing her cheek and falling asleep.

* * *

**AN: **Sorry it took so long. Next update shouldn't, I hope. Thank you again for all the reviews and messages on tumblr and twitter. If you don't already, please follow me there. User name is klikeszombies on both sites.

Thoughts? Questions? Ideas? Predictions?


	12. Chapter 12

After Halloween things went back to the way they had been before Quinn made it abundantly obvious that she had feelings for Rachel. She pined around the house, and silently in Rachel's presence but the situation wasn't discussed and Quinn was convinced Rachel was trying to pretend like it never happened. Brittany thought it was more likely that Rachel was in denial that Quinn could have feelings for her. Despite Rachel's seemingly abundant self-esteem, she thought very little of herself outside of her vocal and acting talent.

Brittany went back to rehearsing daily. The only difference was that Mike had less time to help her so she often spent hours going over the same section only to have no resolution by the end of the session. Santana was also busy working for the theater and rehearsing her own projects for her classes. This left increasingly less time for them to do homework together at the Library. She insisted that she was fine, and that she had it covered, but in secret she studied so much that everything except dancing took a back seat. Including sleep. She made herself eat regularly, but she knew she wasn't drinking enough water or sleeping near enough. But what could she do? Slowing down wasn't an option.

She went, for the first time since meeting her, three days without seeing Santana. She had had to schedule rehearsal time for her professors to observe her over one of their scheduled lunch periods and other wise, their schedules never met up. Several times, even though Brittany wasn't getting done until three or four in the morning, she thought about going over to Santana's apartment and just crawling into bed with her so that she could at least feel her presence. She missed her so bad.

Santana was in the same position. She desperately wanted to spend time with her girlfriend. She knew that they'd always have to face times where their schedules didn't match and they'd not be able to see each other. But even in their phone conversations and texts she could tell that Brittany was getting increasingly more stressed out. She wasn't sure what to do exactly because Brittany was telling her that everything was fine. Santana told her causally to study less but Brittany just scoffed and changed the subject.

One night while at the dance studio Brittany knew she had overdone it. She had only had two hours in the practice room booked but the person scheduled after her hadn't shown up so she just kept dancing. When she looked up and saw that it was 11:00 she knew she had to go because she was cutting way into the time she had scheduled to be studying. She was already feeling completely exhausted and out of it and she knew she was never going to get to bed tonight. The thought was depressing. She bent over to catch her breath and when she stood back up everything started spinning. She caught herself on one of the mirrors before she fell over and held herself there until she felt like she could stand without falling. She picked up her bag and briefly thought she should put her sweat pants and coat on but then she just didn't. She didn't have a reason, she wasn't distracted by anything, but her brain never relayed the thought to her body so she walked out, dragging her bag. She noticed when she got out into the hallways that she had tunnel vision and she wanted to sit down. But she knew she had to study. The further down the hall she got (and in reality the hall isn't that long but tonight it felt like miles) the more upset she got. She wasn't even sure why she was upset, there wasn't a specific thing that set her off but she felt like she was going to cry. She was upset because she felt exhausted and she still had so much to do before she could sleep. IF she could sleep. She wanted to cry because she missed Santana so bad she could feel it all over. She would give just about anything to be in her arms right now. And that's when she decided that no matter what she'd see Santana tonight. Even if it were just to hug her and then lie next to her and study for the rest of the night, she would see Santana. She needed it.

Mike was leaving rehearsal tired, and glad to be heading home to bed when he accidently ran right into someone knocking them to the ground. "Oh my God I'm sorry! Oh! Britt are you ok?" Brittany was sat on the ground, her bag next to her with some stuff fallen out, and making no attempts at getting up. So Mike reached his hand out to help her, which she took, and struggled to her feet.

"Hi. I'm just" she started to mumble to herself. "Santana. My legs have cramps." She looked completely destroyed. Her eyes were blood shot and she didn't even look steady on her feet. "Bye." And then she just turned around and walked out. After a minute he decided that Brittany was definitely in no condition to be walking anywhere right now by herself. He'd make her wait here, and go get his car and drive her where she needed to go. So he ran outside but couldn't see her. So he went back inside to grab his cell phone and that's when he saw that when she dropped her bag, the things that fell out she never put back in. So her cell phone was sitting there, as well as a pair of sweat pants. He picked it up and did what made the most sense, called Santana. At first he didn't think she was going to pick up but then on the fourth ring he heard it click.

"Baby?" Was mumbled sleepily over the phone.

"Hey Santana, it's Mike."

"Where's Brittany what's wrong?!"

"She's ok. I mean, I just ran into her when she was walking out of the studio and she seemed really out of it but she mentioned your name. I'm going to walk towards your place and see if I can find her and at least get her to put some pants on."

"She's not wearing pants?!" Santana yelled into the phone. Mike could hear noise in the background what he assumed was her getting out of bed to find Brittany.

"She had shorts on. But Santana, she needs to sleep and she needs to drink some water she was talking about cramps in her legs."

"Yeah got it I need to find her." And then the phone went dead. He grabbed his stuff and ran out in the direction he thought she might have gone.

"Where the fuck are my car keys!" Santana screamed into her empty room. She needed to go. Brittany needed her. Finally she sees them exactly where she's looked five times already. She grabs them and runs to the front door. Upon flinging the door open she sees that Brittany is already there sitting just to the side of the door with bare knees pulled to her chest and her head buried in her arms.

"Oh Brittany. Baby. Are you ok?" Brittany's head snaps up and she looks blearily at Santana.

"All the lights were out and I couldn't think of a way to get in and not wake Quinn up. I just wanted to hug you before I study. I just miss you." Santana helps Brittany up and pulls her teary eyed girlfriend into her chest. The relief she feels that Brittany is ok is intense, that's her first instinct. Her second is pure joy that she is finally, finally in her arms again. The third is worry because Mike was right, she is out of it.

"Baby" she lays kisses to Brittany's hair. "You never ever need to worry about something like that. Just wake her. She'd be more upset that you were sitting out here with shorts and no coat because you were worried about waking her."

"How did you know I was out here?"

"You left your phone in the dance building. Mike has it. We'll get it sometime tomorrow. Come inside. You need to eat and get some water in you. And baby your skin is freezing. Come on." Brittany leaned into her as they walked, almost like she couldn't support her own weight. She was dead on her feet. But Santana grabbed her bag and they went inside. "Sit down I'm going to make you a sandwich. Here's some water." She hands her a bottle. "This feels familiar." She says more to herself than Brittany. "What's going on Brittany, you need to talk to me." She says once Brittany has made it through a bottle of water and is looking slightly more alert.

"I'm just studying and dancing so much."

"Like how much? Be honest with me, how much are you sleeping?"

"You're going to get mad."

"I'm not mad Brittany I'm concerned. Now please tell me."

"Like three hours." Brittany looks down half ashamed and partially afraid that Santana is going to get angry. "I'm sorry I just don't know what else to do." Santana takes a deep breath. She's frustrated but she knows she needs to be careful. Brittany is exhausted so anything is likely to upset her or hurt her feelings and that is the last thing Santana wants.

"Britt I'm not mad baby. I promise. Just concerned. But we've talked about this. You can't just give up on the things you need like eating and sleeping to do homework. Do you think you're maybe overdoing it on the homework a little bit? It shouldn't be this hard babe."

Brittany looks up at her, tears definitely about to fall now. "But it is this hard. I'm not over doing it. Nothing sticks Santana. Nothing. I read it a million times and it just won't stay there. I try so hard." The tears start escaping. Santana sets the sandwich in front of her and hugs her again. "If I don't get good grades, I lose my scholarship. If I don't dance well, they'll take my scholarship away. I feel like I lose no matter what. Or I don't sleep. Caus if I lose my scholarship, my parents will make me go to business school. I can't do that San. I would be miserable if I couldn't dance." Brittany starts to cry harder. Who would ever take this angel away from something that makes her so happy? She knows the answer to that question. She thinks that maybe this is a conversation for another time. There are more important things that need dealt with immediately. She holds Brittany for a few more minutes before gently pulling away. Brittany resists for a second but then relents and separates too.

"Eat your sandwich. And here's more water."

"Could I maybe have some juice instead?" And even though Santana knows water is better, Brittany sounds so tired and low, she gets her some juice to go with her sandwich and sits down next to her.

"I don't want you to get upset. Ok? And I'm going to remind you again that I am in no way mad at you. But we need to figure something out. I can't help you if you're not letting me know that things aren't going ok." Brittany puts her sandwich down and lowers her head for a second before she looks back up at Santana.

"It's not your job to take care of me. I should be able to do it."

"There's a lot of untrue about that statement. One, I'm your girlfriend. I lo-ike taking care of you." Shit it almost slipped. "I like taking care of you. So it is my job. I make it my job. And baby, please understand that you aren't used to a support system. When someone cares about you, they help you and do what they can do take care of you when you can't take care of you. You would do it for me wouldn't you? If things got to hard and I was forgetting to eat you'd bring me dinner wouldn't you? And make me go to bed?" Brittany nods, eyes watering. Santana picks up the sandwich and hands it back to her, urging her to eat. "I think we need to come up with a schedule. Times that you can study with me. So I can help you. It might mean a little less time dancing. But I promise you, and I know you know this, if you're sleeping regularly everything is going to be just a little bit easier. You be more honest with me when you're struggling, and we can both do a better job at taking care of you."

Brittany knows this. And she knows Santana isn't meaning to, but she's making Brittany feel a little bit dumb. Because no matter how many times she's told herself the same thing, she couldn't make it work in her head. But with Santana saying it, she believes it. It's hard to believe that someone could care about her the way Santana does. Willing to spend her own time to make Brittany's life easier. She knows she just needs to get used to it. But she doesn't think it will ever feel less amazing to be this important to someone. Brittany finishes her last bite of sandwich before nodding her head. "Ok. Let's do it."

"First, sleep. We can work out a schedule tomorrow over lunch. Ok?" She takes Brittany's hand and leads her to the bedroom.

"I should shower. You'll probably think I smell gross."

"Nope. Get your stinky butt in bed. If you're not in my arms in two seconds I'm going to start pouting." Brittany wonders how Santana can make her melt in just about any situation as she peels off everything but her underwear and climbs into bed. She doesn't even have the strength to put a tank top on. Which obviously Santana has no complaints about. She took the blonde into her arms and pulled her in as close as possible. "Sometimes I feel it's not possible to get close enough to you. Like I just want you closer." Brittany nods into her chest and pulls herself in even more and tangled their legs together.

"It will be nice to take a break over Thanksgiving. I wish I could just stay in my dorm room." She mumbles sleepily into Santana's chest. "Hold tighter San." Santana tightened her grip again. "I needed this. And you. I need you." Santana's breath caught.

"I need you too Britt. Go to bed baby." She felt Brittany quickly fall to sleep. She stayed awake for a little bit thinking through her schedule so her and Brittany could talk about it tomorrow. She also knew she needed to call her mother in the morning to talk about Brittany coming for Thanksgiving. She kissed her forehead tenderly, laughing at the little sleep sounds Brittany made, before closing her eyes and falling asleep.

The next morning Santana woke up to her alarm going off. Brittany was lying almost completely on top of her at this point so she struggled to reach the phone and shut it off. Even with the movement and noise Brittany was still dead asleep. She must be exhausted, Santana figured, and she briefly considered letting her sleep through a few classes. She certainly needed the sleep, but she thought that Brittany might be angry with her if she did that, and she definitely didn't want to make the problems that Brittany was having worse. She only wanted to help her. She figured she could let Brittany sleep for at least fifteen more minutes so she lay with Brittany draped across her running her fingers up and down her naked back. She missed touching Brittany. Yeah, she missed the physical feelings that came with the things they did to each other, but mostly she missed the closeness. But she could deal, if maybe Brittany slept over more often. Because this felt pretty damn wonderful.

At fifteen minutes she knew she had to wake up the sleeping blonde, so she braced her against her body with her arms and gently turned so she was laying next to Brittany who immediately curled into her, instinctually missing the warmth. Santana started slowly waking her up with kisses, gentle touches, and soft words. Brittany eventually stirred awake and put her arms around Santana to hug her close again. "You gotta get up baby. We need to get you back to your room to shower and change for classes and stuff." Brittany kissed her deeply in response.

"Thank you Santana." Santana started to ask for what but Brittany stopped her with another kiss. "For everything. You're amazing. You make every single part of my life better. Even dancing is better for having you. I promise I'm going to try and balance everything better, and I will be better at talking about it."

"I'm just glad I can give you a fraction of what you give me." They lay there for a few more minutes basking in each other and exchanging slow kisses. Both grateful for this moment of closeness before the day begins. "Ok babe we need to get you back or you are going to be late."

Sitting in the car after driving back from dropping Brittany off at her dorm she decides now is as good a time as any to call her mother. She wasn't nervous because if anything her mother would make a passive aggrieve excuse as to why it wouldn't be a good idea to bring Brittany home. And then Santana would tell her that's fine that she's going to stay at school and have Thanksgiving with Brittany because as long as she could do something about it, Brittany was absolutely not going home. She pulled out her phone and scrolled down to her mother's phone number.

"Hola mija."

"Morning Mami."

"Everything going ok? School is going well yes?"

"It's fine. I have an easy semester. I actually called about Thanksgiving."

"Ok?"

"Well, I have a girlfriend. We've been together for about two months, and I'd really like for her to come to our home for Thanksgiving."

"You have a girlfriend? Tell me about her." Santana is, to say the least, shocked. She doesn't doubt her parents love her. She's never doubted it. And after hearing about Brittany's parents, she thought hers were pretty darn supportive. Despite them not being very close, they came to her performances every time they could and even when she made choices her instructors didn't love, her parents always told her they were proud. She made a mental note to tell Brittany how proud she was of her.

"She's well, she's Brittany. That's her name. And she's a dancer. The most beautiful girl I've ever seen. She's taller than me with blonde hair and blue eyes. Oh and the most beautiful laugh, and she says the most amazing things. She's a year younger than me." Santana gushed and her mother chuckled but then got quiet.

"Does she know about your differences mija?"

"Yes! And she doesn't care. Didn't even faze her. It's like it's not even something unusual with her. Like girls are born with penis's all the time." Maribel Lopez smiled listening to how happy her daughter sounded. She had always hoped this would happen for Santana, she desperately wanted a normal life for her. She spent countless days and nights wondering if she had made the right decisions for her as a small child and this is just one more reassurance that she was going to be ok.

"Are you being" she cleared her throat. "safe Santana?" The topic was uncomfortable. Talking about sex with any of her five children was uncomfortable. But with Santana, and she wished it wasn't so, it felt even more so.

"Mami! Dios mio. We aren't even doing that yet." She hissed into the phone. "But when we are ready, Brittany is on birth control."

"I just worry mija. "

"I know mami. So, about Thanksgiving?"

"Of course she can come. Your papi and I would love to meet her. Your brothers have already, I assume, when they came to visit." Santana felt a little bad at the tone of her mother's voice that indicated that she felt a little slighted that her brothers knew about Brittany before she did. "You know you can talk to me about anything. I know that sometimes I come off as distant but I love you so much Santana, and I don't want you to ever think any different." Santana wished she could hug her mother. She didn't often have those urges but she really did right now.

"I love you to mami. We should try to call more often."

"We should. Ok I have to go to work. I love you and I look forward to seeing you when you come home with Brittany."

"Uh, I have one more question." Santana said hesitantly.

"You can sleep in the same room as long as you are respectful of the fact that you are in my and your fathers house. Ok?"

"Thank you! I love you and will talk to you soon!" She heard her mother laugh.

"Goodbye Santana." Her mother hung up and she went inside to shower and finish up some homework before she met Brittany for lunch.

She decided they should handle business first before telling Brittany that her mother invited her to Thanksgiving. Or rather that she asked and her mother said yes. Either way, so long as Brittany really didn't want to go to her home for Thanksgiving (and why would she?), she had a real alternative and that made Santana feel good. When she got to the dining hall she only had to wait a few minutes before Brittany showed up, she was going to be a few minutes late because she needed to get her phone from Mike, and they went in and got their food and a table. It took them nearly forty-five minutes to work out a schedule that would fit Santana's schedule and allow for Brittany to get the time she needed for both studying and dancing with minimal compromises.

"This looks so much less scary than my schedules I had made for myself." Brittany breathed a sigh of relief.

"See what happens when you let me help. Things are better when we do them together." Brittany nodded at her, smiling. "So, I actually have something else to talk to you about." Santana began hesitantly.

"Ok…"

"What would you think about going home with me for Thanksgiving break. We could go do our super date night, and then go stay at my house for the rest of break. If you want that is."

"Yes!" Already excited, but then hesitant to get her hopes to far up. "Did you ask your parents?"

"Mhmm. I'm really excited B. Time off together. We can do anything you want."

"Anything?" Brittany asked and Santana detected a little bit of seduction in her tone. Apparently Brittany was feeling the same way Santana had been lately.

"Anything as long as my parents aren't home."

"Even just to be able to lay with you for hours and not have something else we need to do. Oh we could watch movies San! And play games or we could go places! Can you see the beach where you live? I know it's cold but we could go see."

"We can do anything and everything you want. We can see the ocean and watch a million movies. I don't care as long as I can have you with me."

"I'm excited to meet your family." In her excitement Brittany has practically crawled into Santana's lap. Close enough for Santana to nuzzle her face.

"They are excited to meet you too. You smell good." Brittany giggled as Santana's nose tickled her slightly. She had one more thing she wanted to mention to Brittany and was hopeful it wouldn't sound strange or needy (even though Santana thought she might be a little needy when it came to Brittany) "I want you to know that any time you want to stay over you can. If you just need to sleep over so you can stop thinking or because you don't wan to be alone-"

"or because I need you?"

"Or because you need me. You can always come over. Ok? I love sleeping with you."

"It's pretty much my favorite thing too."

"So maybe tonight you could…?"

"Meet you outside of the theatre when your rehearsal is over and go home with you?" Santana nods and bights her lower lip. She hasn't known Brittany for very long, and she knows their relationship by all standards has been short. But she'd ask Brittany to move in with her if there was a reason. She couldn't think of anything that would make her happier than to go to sleep with Brittany every night and wake up every morning together.

After they finished lunch they headed their separate directions. When Brittany's next class ended early she decided to call her mother, which she didn't really want to do, to tell her that she wouldn't be coming home for Thanksgiving. She didn't even really expect her mom to answer, and was fully prepared to leave a voice mail. She preferred it even, but no such luck for that.

"Hello."

"Oh I, hello mom."

"Do you need something?" She's glad she didn't just call to talk or that might have hurt her feelings.

"I just wanted to know what your plans for Thanksgiving were because-"

"I had meant to call you but completely forgot. Your father sister and I are going to visit some friends for the holiday. Do you have a friend you can stay with? Or you could come home I guess if you don't have anyone to stay with but we're having the floors refinished so you'd have to just stay in the basement. I wish you would have stayed friends with all your friends from high school Brittany."

"I have someone to stay with." Don't let this bother you Brittany, don't get upset. Don't let this bring you down.

"Oh, is it a boy?"

"No."

"Ok. I have to go. I will talk to you sometime soon. Bye." And the phone went dead. She doesn't care, she hasn't cared, but Santana cares. Sam cares. Mercedes and Quinn and Rachel and Kurt care. She made herself think about all the wonderful things that she'd get to do with Santana, and how much she'd get to see of her. A few months ago she would have expected this from her mother. But once you have someone like Santana, and you learn what warmth and capacity for caring someone can have, she can't help but be sad that the woman that birthed her doesn't care but her girlfriend would do anything for her.

To Santana: I can't wait to spend break with you. And the night. And for as long as you want me.

She only had to wait a few minutes to hear a response.

From Santana: I will always want you B.

She took a few more minutes to take comfort in that text message. She heard her phone ring and assumed it was Santana but the ID read Tina.

"Hey Tina what's up?"

"Nothing. I was just talking to Mike, and since you don't have a choreographer, that means you don't have a costume. I was wondering if maybe you'd like me to make you one. It's good for my portfolio and it'd be something you don't have to worry about."

"That sounds awesome Tina." She tried to keep the enthusiasm in her voice. She thought she might have failed a little bit but Tina didn't seem to notice to much.

"Cool. Ok so I need to take your measurements sometime soon and maybe come with Mike to watch you go through it to make sure whatever I make will work for you. Is that ok? Maybe tonight?"

"I'm not working tonight. I need a Santana night really bad. But I will text you and let you know when I'll be rehearsing next. Ok?"

"Sounds good. I'm really excited to work with you Brittany. And have fun with Santana."

"Me too. Thank you! Have a good day." The phone call made her momentarily happy but she was still feeling down about the phone call with her mom. She knew she shouldn't be surprised or hurt. She knew that. She didn't even think that her mother meant to hurt her feelings. She just didn't think about it. Or her. And that's what hurt the most. She picked up her phone and hit her most frequently called number.

"Hey baby. What's going on?" Hearing Santana's voice broke what little reserve she had. She could feel her eyes burn with tears.

"Hi. I just wanted to talk to you. Missed you."

"You sound down baby, anything wrong?"

"What are you doing? Can I come over?"

"You can but I have to play piano at rehearsal. I can maybe cancel if you need me to?"

"No, it's ok, I forgot about rehearsal. I'll meet you at the theater after. Good luck babe."

"Are you sure? If you need me…"

"No I promise it's fine." She tried to keep her voice up so Santana would believe her. She didn't want Santana to feel bad about having to go to rehearsal.

"Ok baby. You can come a few minutes early, sometimes we're done then." Santana could tell something was wrong but without seeing Brittany she couldn't tell the severity. And Brittany said it was fine. She should trust Brittany.

"I will. See you later."

"Bye babe."

When Brittany got off the phone she grabbed her stuff and headed to her last class. During which, all she could think about was trying to rationalize herself out of being upset about her mother. After the class, she headed back her dorm room to wait until Santana got done so she could talk to her. When she got back to the dorm room she saw Rachel sitting on her bed with headphones on writing furiously. Brittany raised her hand in greeting and flopped onto her bed.

"Hello Brittany. Did you stay at Santana's last night?"

"Yeah I was kind of a mess. Working too hard."

"I agree you are. How was your day?" Brittany hesitated to answer. How had her day been? It had been fine, good even, except for the conversation with her mother. Could she talk to Rachel about it? They were friends.

"It was ok except for a conversation with my mom." She chose vague. And if Rachel cared, Rachel would ask. And if she was too busy then she'd just leave it be.

"Would you like to talk about it? The conversation with your mother?" Rachel seemed like she genuinely wanted to listen.

"You don't mind?"

"Of course not." Rachel got off her bed and crossed to Brittany's and sat next to her. Brittany's bed was a little taller so she needed to jump a few times to get up which made Brittany laugh a little. "So what happened?"

"Well, I guess my family and I don't have the best relationship. I don't really fit in." She tried to give Rachel enough back-story without having to explain her entire life. "I don't talk to them very often. But Santana invited me to come to Thanksgiving with her, which I said yes of course because how amazing will that be?" She felt the bad feelings loosen their hold on her chest a little. "I thought I should at least tell my family I wouldn't be home. I didn't think they'd care. So I guess I don't know why the call made me so upset. But when I asked my mom what they were doing, she said they were going away with my sister to see friends. But they didn't even tell me. What if I hadn't called? When would they have remembered I exist? Why didn't they invite me to go?" Brittany felt herself getting upset again. Rachel sensed it to, and took her hand in both of hers.

"Did you say anything to her?" Brittany shakes her head no.

"She just said I should find a friend to stay with, or I could stay in the basement."

"The basement?!" Rachel imagined her basement, full of spiders and Hanukkah decorations in near equal amounts.

"Our basement is like a small apartment. It's got a fridge and a microwave and bathroom and stuff. So it wouldn't be the worst thing ever. But I told her I was staying with someone. And she just asked if it was a boy, and I said no. And then she just said she had to go and hung up."

"I'm sorry Brittany. I don't know anything about your situation but I do know that if I was in that situation I would feel a little worthless too."

"Yeah. I just don't understand why that happened. Like why am I not important enough to at least text?" Tears began to come to her eyes.

"You are important enough though Brittany. So important. Ask Santana how important you are. And you are one of the nicest people I know, one of my best friends. I wouldn't even have any other friends if it weren't for you. I think you're very important." Brittany looked at Rachel. She hadn't even thought about how she had helped Rachel. She smiled down at her. "And I bet Sam and Quinn and Mercedes and Kurt and Mike and Tina all think you're important. As you know, I'm adopted. And I've never once doubted how much my fathers loved me. Family has nothing to do with biology. Sometimes they pick you. And sometimes you pick them. If your family doesn't appreciate you for how amazing you are, pick a new one." Brittany's eyes clouded over with tears and she folded herself into a surprised Rachel who took it in stride and hugged the taller girl.

After a few moments Brittany lifted herself back up and wiped the tears from under her eyes. Rachel is right. Brittany had people here that were better than any she'd ever had. Real friends. She was closest with Rachel and Sam but she'd get closer to the rest of them. And Santana. Santana was the best thing that had ever happened to her. Best thing that ever will happen to her. When she thought about it that way, she had way more to be happy for than to be upset over.

"Thanks Rachel. I'm glad I came back here and that I talked to you." Rachel's answering smile made Brittany think that Rachel was glad they talked too. The rest of the time that Brittany spent waiting for Santana to get done she showered and then the two girls spent the rest of the time talking about their favorite movies and who was who in Rachel's program. "I don't really know a lot of people in my program other than Mike. And me getting the solo hasn't helped me making friends with the other first years."

"They're just jealous Brittany. I can tell you from personal experience that it is difficult being so much better than other people, but I deal with it as gracefully as I can." Rachel nodded her head solemnly. Brittany nodded her head as well but was trying desperately not to laugh.

"Ok Rach, I've got to go meet Santana. Thanks again!" She left the dorm with her bag and ran down to the theater building. It was cold outside so she slipped inside the lobby and grabbed one of her books she needed to finish reading out of her bag. She was even a little earlier then Santana had told her to be. She was excited to see her. It wasn't anxiety or stress filled need for Santana's comfort, it was genuine excitement. She was so lost somewhere between her thoughts and the book she was sort of reading that she didn't hear the door open.

"Hey baby." Santana said gently, not wanting to scare the blonde. Brittany looked up, eyes wide, put her book down, and stood up and threw her arms around the smaller girls neck.

"How was rehearsal San?" Brittany asked pulling away slightly but not separating from Santana.

"Fine as usual. I just sit behind a piano and play the same thing over and over. It's no big deal. But what about you? Are you ok?"

"Fine. We can talk about it if you want but I'm ok. Can we go for a drive before we go to your place? I just want to spend a little time with you." Santana takes her hand and pulls her out to the car. She was anxious, Brittany seemed ok but she had spent the entire rehearsal feeling guilty about choosing anything over Brittany. But she had been torn between her obligations and wanting to be there for Brittany always. They get out to the car and get in and Santana starts heading off in the first direction that occurs to her. Brittany couldn't help but notice she was distracted.

"What's wrong baby?

"Just worried. You sounded sad earlier."

"Yeah. I was. I talked to my mom and found out that they're visiting friends and they hadn't even told me or invited me along during Thanksgiving break. Not that it matters because I was just calling to tell them I wasn't coming home. And then when I told my mom I had a place to go, she didn't even ask anything about you or your parents or anything. I was just kind of hit with the sadness of her not caring about me."

"Oh Britt" she looked at Brittany, her eyes full of pity. "I should have been there. I'm so sorry. I-"

"No it's ok! I talked to Rachel. She said some things that made a lot of sense and I feel a lot better now." Brittany nodded her head resolutely and Santana knew she was being honest. She also knew that she should be happy that Brittany was feeling ok, but there was some small part of her that was maybe jealous that it hadn't been her to help make Brittany feel better. And beyond the (admittedly ridiculous) jealousy, she also felt like a complete jerk. She should have been there. "I just want you to know that I feel so lucky to have you. I feel so lucky that someone like you chose someone like me." Santana shook her head. She says someone like her like Brittany isn't the most amazing thing that's ever happened to her.

"You amaze me B. Every single day. You're so strong and smart and beautiful that sometimes I don't even know how to process it all. So I feel lucky to have you. And I feel lucky that someone like you chose someone like me. So I guess we're even there." And like that, Santana was distracted from her guilt, and Brittany was made positive that nobody could make her happier than Santana did.

The closer it got to dress rehearsal and the performance the more stressed Brittany got. She stuck to the schedule that her and Santana had come up with, and the structure definitely helped, but she was anxious but definitely excited. She was pretty confident in her choreography and dancing. Mike was really supportive and Tina had now seen it and said it was beautiful. She didn't think they'd lie. If something about it were terrible, Mike would just talk to her about how to fix it. She had started to notice some resentment from some of the girls in her class. She was quickly being picked out as one of the better ones in her classes, on top of getting the solo. It wasn't anything she couldn't handle, she'd encountered some of the same thing at her school at home. She hadn't heard from her parents since she'd talked to her mother about not coming home. She sent a quick email inviting them to the dance concert, fully expecting they would come up with an excuse as to why they couldn't come. She didn't expect to get no response, but she didn't dwell on it. She was choosing her own family.

A few days before dress rehearsal she got a text from Tina asking her to come visit the costume shop to try on the costume she had made her. Rachel was in the room with her when she'd gotten the text so she asked her to go with her. Rachel had been obsessing for days about auditions that were coming up and Brittany thought it'd be good to get her out of the room. She also thought that Rachel could help her find the costume shop since it was the building she spent most of her time in. When she got to the costume shop Tina was waiting for her with a garment bag.

"Hey Brittany, Rachel. Let's go to one of the dressing rooms." Once they got there she pulled the bag off of the dress and a smile broke out over Brittany's face. "Ok you just need to put this on and then I'll check the fit, we can step outside so you can-" Brittany starts whipping her clothes off leaving just her bra and underwear on. "oh. Ok. Never mind."

"Brittany just does that. She's not shy. Trust me." Rachel tells Tina as Brittany is putting on the dress and stepping in front of the mirror.

"Tina it's perfect." She does a little twirl. The fabric floats around her. It's simple, a light pink, chiffon, baby doll dress. It wasn't something she'd normally wear, and to be honest if she'd costumed herself she wasn't totally sure what she would have picked but it wouldn't have been this. But it was, completely perfect. It was sleeveless, and had an empire waistline with a v-neck. It was short, a little higher than mid thigh. It could almost be lingerie if it wasn't so pretty. It showed a lot of skin without being slutty at all. Which was important because it was not that kind of dance. Not that kind of song. "I love it. You are amazing." Tina smiled bashfully. The theatre students weren't usually this appreciative.

"It really is wonderful Tina. I haven't seen the dance yet, Brittany has been pretty secretive. But it looks wonderful on her."

"I think so too. Thank you guys. Britt could you do just a little part of the dance, especially some of the floor stuff I want to make sure it falls back down when you stand up." They backed up and Brittany did a little piece of the dance that involved her flipping upside down and then laying on the floor for a few seconds before standing back up. When she went upside down the dress lifted all the way to the bottom of her boobs but didn't go over them, which was ideal. But as soon as she stood up the silky material slid back down. "Perfect. I'm really glad I got to help you with this. Keep me in mind if solo's ever come back up."

"Always Tina. And I will recommend you to everyone. This is amazing!" She squealed and jumped up and down clapping her hands before flinging herself at Tina in a hug. Tina was mildly surprised but knowing Brittany at least as well as she does, she knew this was par for the course.

Now Brittany was really excited. It was starting to feel more real and in just a few days she'd get to perform it for the rest of the people in the show and the professors. But most of all, she was excited to show Santana and the rest of her friends.

The night before first dress Brittany was a ball of energy. Santana had insisted she sleep over, unconvinced that Brittany would even bother to lay down if she had stayed in her dorm. At least Santana knew if she was with her, she would at least be laying down which might lead to sleep a little easier than Brittany bouncing around her dorm building. When they were getting ready for bed Santana wanted so badly to touch Brittany. For Brittany to touch her. They had not had the time and energy to do much lately. And when they did it was quick, in part because it was infrequent but also because they were tired and they knew that they had to be up early the next day or they still had homework to do. She wasn't worried, she just really wanted to spend the time making Brittany feel really good. She was hopeful for Thanksgiving break.

They had abandoned all formality of pajamas, not that there had ever really been a formality to begin with. Most of the time they just wore boxers to bed (usually always belonging to Santana). Sometimes sports bras but more often not. They both found that the exposed skin was preferable. Santana was in bed and Brittany was in the middle of the room talking through something she'd been confused about in class that day. Santana was trying to focus but Brittany was also stretching. Naked or close enough to it. "Baby please get in bed I can't watch you do that. We need to go to sleep."

Brittany looked at her with genuine confusion. "Did I do something wrong?" Santana laughed at her innocent expression.

"Britt what would you do if I was standing in front of you with just boxers on, doing stretches and we hadn't been able to have any kind of sexy time in at least two weeks."

"I would kneel down and blo—Oh. Yeah. OK. Sorry babe!" She jumped onto the bed and onto Santana. "We don't have to sleep. We can do that. I can do that to you."

"No. You need to at least settle down and sleep and if we start I don't think I can stop. I want you, for like hours. And we don't have that kind of time so just come here." She opened up her arms and Brittany dove into them. They were her favorite place to be. She snuggled into Santana's naked chest immediately laying kisses where she assumed her heart was. Santana laughed and started dragging her fingers through Brittany's silky hair. Brittany felt herself relax in a way that only Santana could manage to make her right now.

"Sing to me?"

"Ok. Any requests?" Brittany shook her head no. "Hmm." She started humming the beginning notes of a song. "The first time ever I saw your face, I thought the sun rose in your eyes." she kept singing. Since she had started developing feelings, or lets be honest, had been smacked in the face with feelings for Brittany this song had come up in her head a lot. "Like the trembling heart of a captive bird that was there at my command, my love." She felt moisture in her eyes. This song felt so honest. She wished she could be. She wished she could just tilt Brittany's face up and tell her that she loved her. Desperately so. It wasn't uncertainty that prevented her from saying anything, she might not have ever been so certain of anything as she was about how much she loved Brittany. She was just terrified to scare Brittany away. She knew the girl had gone through so much and she wouldn't blame her if she didn't think very much of love. She didn't want to ruin what they had which was already so close to perfect.

Brittany felt herself drifting off toward the end of the song, Santana's fingers tracing hearts into her back. She could tell that's what they were. She still couldn't stop the internal battle with herself over whether or not it was to soon to tell Santana how she felt. She didn't want Santana to think that she wasn't sure of her feelings. But she was so sure. She nodded into Santana's chest. Resolute. She'd tell her soon. Soon as the moment came up. She let herself drift off to sleep as soon as Santana started into another song that she didn't know. She did know, however, that she never wanted to fall asleep any other way.

When they woke up the next morning Santana was proud that Brittany had slept the entire night. She wasn't sure why she felt proud but she did. That somehow she could keep Brittany calm and safe enough for her to sleep through the night even with the amount of anxiety and excitement that was running through the girl. Brittany stretched out on top of her, laying kisses all over her neck and face. Brittany was always a morning person. She woke up and was ready to be active in minutes. Santana wasn't like that at all. She'd gotten used to having to be because when Brittany stayed over (which happened at least four nights a week now) she would get up and drive Brittany in so she didn't have to walk in the cold. Most of Brittany's classes were earlier than Santana's except for one day.

After several minutes of ridiculous stretches Brittany bounced out of bed. Literally bounced. "I think I'm going to walk in San. Get out some of the energy. So you stay in bed."

"You sure B?" Santana mumbled sleepily, peering at her girlfriend over the pillow she had her face pushed into.

"Yeah. I feel buzzy right now. I won't be able to sit through class if I don't walk in."

"Ok." Santana watched Brittany flit around the room gathering clothes, a mixture of her own and Santana's. Santana was practically salivating over Brittany's naked body by time she finally put clothes on. She ran off and brushed her teeth and came back in draping herself over Santana and kissing her for all she was worth. "I'm gonna stay at my place tonight. But dinner?" Santana nodded kissing her again. "Ok. Gotta go. Gonna be late. See you later."

"Bye baby" Santana said. Half still dazed with tiredness, half arousal. Brittany left and Santana got herself out of bed anyway. She needed to get into the shower and do something about the morning wood that was showing no signs of going down on it's own.

Brittany thinks she might as well not have even gone to class for all she heard and remembered. The entire day flew. Dinner with Santana was filled with nervous chatter and almost no eating for Brittany. Santana had forced her to eat a banana and a few bites of cereal but that was the best she could do. Brittany walked over to the dance building after dropping her stuff off at her dorm room and getting a good luck lecture from Rachel. She saw Mike as soon as she walked in and immediately went over to him. "I am so nervous Mike. So so so so so nervous. What if they hate it?" She said referring to her professors and the other upper classman that would be giving her feedback after tonight. She started tearing at the plastic covering her costume. Mike stilled her hands.

"Stop Britt. I'm your friend right?" Of course he was. One of her best even. She nodded. "I would have told you if they weren't going to like it. I've been here for a year, I've got a general idea of what they like. Ok? Calm down. They'll give you feed back and you don't even have to take their feed back. It's just suggestion. I've seen plenty of choreographers nod and smile and then ignore it all anyway. So just calm down and show them what you've done. I'm already so proud of you, you should be too." Brittany looked at him for a second and Mike wasn't sure if he'd said something to offend her. And then she, in signature Brittany fashion, launched herself on him into a hug. Some people are enthusiastic huggers. Brittany hugs with her entire body. Her entire existence really. Thrown right at you and trusts you'll catch her. And he did. And spun her around for good measure.

"Ok. I got this. I got this." And she did. Her dance was third to go, Mike had been in a piece right before hers and was in another after hers, both done by intermission. But he snuck out to the house to watch her piece. He knew her choreography. He'd seen it several times and, despite literally bouncing off the walls backstage before she went on, when she did she was as controlled and beautiful as she needed to be. He agreed with her assessment that the costume Tina had made her was perfect. But Tina was kind of perfect, he smiled to himself. Sap. When the piece was finished and she was in her final position he glanced over at the professors and noticed none of them were even talking. But they all had not so subtle smiles on their faces and he's pretty sure he saw one of them quickly wipe a tear from his eye. Mike understood that was his reaction too. The dance was full of an emotion he understood very well. He was interested to see Santana's reaction to it.

He told Brittany that she did amazing but that did nothing to calm her fears for the talk back session afterwards. After they were all done and changed they sat in the house with the professors standing in front of them with their scary clipboards and their judging faces. Brittany wrapped her arm around Mike's, who was sitting next to her. He just shook is head. She really had nothing to worry about he thought.

They started with the first dance and they professors talked about things they might improve, and things they liked. Then they put it out to the other choreographers and dancers for any critique or suggestion. The first piece was well received for the most part, a few small suggestions but nothing terrible. The students also liked it and their comments reflected that. The piece before hers wasn't so lucky. They told the girl that she was underprepared and that she hadn't thought through the piece enough and wasn't giving her dancers enough instruction. Some of the students thought it looked sloppy. Brittany started to panic when they were ending the other student's critique. Her breathing quickened and Mike took her hand and told her to calm down. She tried. And failed.

"Brittany. I am surprised." Here it comes. They hate it. They aren't even going to let her dance it in the show. "That was amazing." Wait. What? "We never expected you to fail. We wouldn't have given you the opportunity if we thought you couldn't handle it. But I, for one, was definitely not expecting something like what we saw. I thought for sure what we saw from your audition was the best of what we were going to get, and it was good, don't get me wrong. But what you just delivered Brittany was exceptional." She felt her eyes widen. She had done it? She had done well?

"I agree Brittany. I have you in more classes so I know your style and your work ethic a little better than some of the other professors. But you even exceeded my expectations. The emotions you portrayed were so simple and honest. I didn't feel bogged down by story. I rarely feel moved by pieces that I would describe as happy, but I was. There was a perfect underlying current of fear, trust, and determination that made the over-all feeling of love, that I felt like you were trying to make us feel, feel so much deeper. Real depth Brittany. Congratulations."

"I was probably the most skeptical of letting you do it. I agreed because your audition was simply the best prepared. I wasn't sure how you'd handle the pressure and opportunity to be honest." With Santana's help. Brittany answered in her head. This critique was the one she was the most nervous about. The chair of the department and internationally known ballet dancer. She was notoriously brutally honest. "You seemed the most prepared, and your dancing was as beautiful as the choreography. You are the youngest choreographer in this room by two years. And you choreographed yourself which is always more difficult for the dancer side of you. But you achieved something that I would gladly put into a professional showcase as it stands right now. You've set your bar high Brittany, but after what I've seen I have no doubt that you will continue to reach and surpass the already high standards." Mike gripped her hand harder and she was glad he did or she would have been positive she was dreaming. After her professor had finished, they all clapped and then asked the students. Some of them had really nice things to say, a few said things that felt really nit picky, and honestly just felt like jealousy. Even Brittany could pick that out. Over all it was about half and half as far as people that were praised and people who weren't. But nobody was praised as highly as Brittany. She felt like she was in the twilight zone.

When she left the building she hugged Mike again and ran off, pulling her phone out of her bag to call Santana. After a few rings she picked up and was excited to hear about how it had gone. She was nervous for Brittany, not having seen the dance yet per Brittany's request, she just assumed that like most things Brittany did, it was amazing. But she knew art was subjective and she'd gotten plenty of bad critiques even though she knew she herself was talented.

Brittany told her everything they had said that she could remember because she was honestly so excited her brain felt like it was just spinning in circles. Santana reacted perfectly. Gasping and squealing and clapping at every comment. "My girlfriend is the best in the world!" She exclaimed loudly.

"I dunno about that San"

"Well I do. You're amazing. I'm so excited to see it. Are you sure I can't come to dress rehearsal tomorrow?"

"No! I want you to see the final performance Friday night. I think I will be best at that one. I always dance something the best the last time I think I'm going to do it. Like I've gotta give it every single thing I have left."

"Ok. Just… save a little something for me for afterwards huh? We've got that great hotel waiting for us."

"Oh don't you worry. I've got so much saved up for that you don't even know." Santana desperately hoped they were both talking about the same thing. Because masturbating is a lot less fun when you have the hottest girlfriend in the world but you're both too busy.

They talked for a little longer about the rest of Santana's day and some of the other pieces in the concert. They talked until Brittany's phone was about to die, they said their goodbyes and goodnights and promised to text each other before they fell asleep. When she got back to her room Rachel was still awake and excitedly waiting for Brittany to tell her how it went. Her and Rachel had gotten even closer since her phone call with her mother, and Brittany couldn't be happier about that situation. Rachel, it turns out, is a really good friend. Sometimes she can be self centered but mostly she doesn't even realize she's doing it and as soon as you point it out to her, she's eager to correct it. Brittany gets it. Rachel is her father's whole world. She's used to being the center of attention. And to be honest, Brittany doesn't even really mind when Rachel is being selfish. But in times like this when she had something important going on, Rachel was the perfect audience.

Rachel was excited about all of Brittany's good critiques and couldn't wait to see the dance on Friday. She was going to the earlier one so that she could catch a bus back to Ohio where she was from, but she had promised that she would type up a detailed report for Brittany on the bus back. Brittany smiled and thanked her. Rachel thought Brittany was like the sister she never had. She gave her someone to take care of sometimes, and felt like Brittany had her back when she needed it too. Brittany mostly just thought Rachel was wonderful, lectures rants and early morning ballads included, and thanked whatever computer system that randomly put the two of them together.

They next day had gone mostly the same, except for nerves though Brittany was pretty much just excited. Sure, to dance for tonight, but mostly to dance for Santana the following evening. Tonight's dress rehearsal would be attended by most of the dance department, all required to see it, and looking to see the show for free if it was an option. A lot of people came up to her afterward and told her she did a good job, and Mike beamed at her like a proud big brother every time it happened. A few people said some not nice things, including a girl in one of her classes who, while walking past Brittany, mentioned loud enough for her and Mike to hear that the girl thought Brittany might be gaining weight and maybe her dress should be longer. Brittany shook it off because she was positive she had not gained weight. If anything, she'd lost it. Something Santana pointed out occasionally and would then try to feed her everything she could find. She called Santana just as she had the night before and told her how it had gone, omitting the girl's comment, attempting to avoid Santana's predictable reaction of wanting to beat the girl up, and wanting to come feed Brittany cheeseburgers. After the call she finished packing for break, they were leaving right after the dance concert tomorrow night even though they technically didn't have to be out until Monday evening. Both girls had decided to skip their Monday class in favor of a little extra break. Everyone was going to do it anyway, they'd told themselves at least.

Brittany realized at about three in the morning that she probably should have stayed with Santana that night. She couldn't sleep, like at all. But it was too late to show up there. She got up and quietly went through her bag to get out her ipod and pushed the ear buds into her ear and pressed play on her "S+B" play list. She listened and focused on distracting herself with her favorite topic, she didn't think about dance. Just Santana. All kind of things about Santana. She focused on how much better existing felt in Santana's arms and eventually, after an hour, she fell asleep.

When she woke up the next morning before her alarm clock, she thought the only option might be running, even though it was cold out. Then she went to class and as per the last few days, heard and retained nothing. She did her best to take good notes so Santana could help her later, but she just couldn't make herself go into learning mode. She ate lunch with Santana and forced down a chicken salad that Santana had to make for her because she couldn't even stop bouncing around enough to do that properly. Santana mostly just laughed. Brittany deserved to be this excited, she had worked so hard.

After lunch she headed over to the dance building to get ready for performance number one. Mike laughed as Brittany ran up and down the stairs. She checked her phone right before she had to turn it off for the performance and had several good luck texts from Santana and one picture message of Rachel in her seat pointing to Brittany's name in her program. Kurt and Blaine were also in the picture. She was glad they got on with Rachel so well, and that they had decided to come support her. She shut her phone off and put her headphones on and put herself in the zone. The performance went without a hitch. She almost wished she had one of the later pieces so she didn't have so much time to sit around and do nothing afterwards. She watched most of the pieces again from the wings, settled well out of the way. After intermission Mike thumb wrestled with her for a while. And then curtain call came up and they all went back on. When she ran forward to bow she heard her own little cheering section erupt. Rachel, to be out done by no one, was of course the loudest. She felt tears come to her eyes. Nobody had ever come just for her before. Not since she was little and her parents came to keep up appearance.

She went backstage and changed as quick as she could so she could go meet Rachel and the boys. When she walked out to the lobby she was hit with a tiny ball of Rachel Berry. Rachel praised her for so long that she couldn't stop blushing and eventually had to hush her. "At least you won't have to write that report now." Brittany joked.

"Oh I fully intend on writing it. I just need a moment to process it before I put it all into written form. Expect it no later than eleven tonight." Rachel responded resolutely. Brittany laughed and told her ok. The boys also told both her and Mike that they had been amazing. Tina loved it and told her that it was even better than the last time she'd seen it. Over all it was wonderful. But it served to just make her that much more excited for Santana to see it. She went back to the dressing rooms and grabbed her phone and turned it on. She saw texts from Santana, mostly goofy little things. One a picture of her in the practice room. And then the last one saying to text her when she was done, she is bringing her some food that will settle ok before the next performance. She texted her and said she was out and that they could meet at her dorm. She started walking back in that direction, checking the rest of her messages. She had one from her mother. She hesitated but told herself no matter what it said, it didn't matter.

Except this time it did.

From Mom: Brittany I hope your dance thing is going well. I just wanted to give you a little heads up that I think Tommy is planning on driving up to surprise you, and bring you back to his house for Thanksgiving. Isn't that nice of him? I just wanted to tell you so you could look your best when you saw him. –Mom

Brittany panicked. Full fledge couldn't breathe panicked for about two minutes. But then she tried to calm herself down. Santana was coming. Santana would know what to do. She would be ok. He wouldn't even be able to get to her. She sat down on the steps of the dorm building and waited for Santana. She didn't have to wait long before she pulled up and got out of the car smiling, carrying a bag. Her smile quickly fell though when she took in Brittany's still slightly panicked expression.

"Britt are you ok? I thought you said the show went well?" Brittany shook her head yes.

"It went ok. Just, something happened. I got a text. And I don't know what to do." Brittany felt the panic creeping back in. Santana reached out for her hand and pulled her up and led her inside to get her out of the cold, which she knew was bad for her muscles if she was going to be dancing tonight. Santana signed herself in and led the near despondent Brittany up to her room. She unlocked the door after taking the keys out of Brittany's hand and went into the room. She breathed a sigh of relief that Rachel wasn't there.

"Ok. Talk to me." She tried to keep the panic out of her own voice. She didn't like when Brittany got like this. It wasn't ever a good sign. Brittany didn't say a word she just took out her phone and handed it to Santana. Santana took it, confused, and unlocked it. There was already a message loaded onto the screen. She read it carefully before dropping the phone onto Brittany's bed and shaking her head. "No. No. This isn't going to happen. He can't come anywhere near you." The note of panic in Santana's voice snapped Brittany out of hers. She wasn't the only one scared here.

"I have to dance San." Santana took a deep breath.

"Yeah you do. OK. What do we do?" She looked up at Brittany, eyes desperate.

"Maybe he won't come. She said she thinks."

"I think that means she's pretty sure. Well." She took a deep breath. Focus. Logic. "Me, Sam, Mercedes, and Quinn are all going to be there tonight. I can tell them that you and I have to leave right after, and we can meet you at like, the back door? That way they can tell you you're amazing, but you don't ever have to go out to the lobby which is where I'm sure he'll expect you to go afterwards right?" Brittany nodded. This could work. "Then we'll just leave right away. And if for some reason he comes out there, we will all be there too. So he won't be able to get to you. Ok?" Brittany nodded. It made sense. She just wishes it wouldn't have come up at all. "I'm going to take care of you. Ok? He won't hurt you. He won't even talk to you." She took Brittany into her arms and held her tight. Brittany nodded into her shoulder. "But for now, lets get you some food and liquid in you because I'm not going to let him cause you to hurt yourself tonight." She pulled out of her bag two containers of home made chicken noodle soup, good bread, and two bottles of Gatorade.

Brittany tried not to focus on her ex being anywhere near her. And for the most part it worked. Santana's powers of distraction were magic. It was getting to be time that she had to get back to the dance building, and Santana wanted to go get ready. But while Santana had been doing everything she could to distract her girlfriend, she herself was focused on the problem at hand.

"Britt I don't want to bring this back up but could you please show me a picture of him? Just in case I see him or something." Brittany started to protest but Santana already knew what she was concerned about. "I promise I won't approach him. I would just feel better knowing." Brittany nodded and pulled her laptop out logging onto her almost never used Facebook account. She went through her sister's page who, Santana noted, looked like a bigger chested, mean, version of Brittany. She wasn't surprised that her sister was still friends with Tommy and clicked on his profile. Santana thought he looked exactly like she'd pictured him. Mr. All American with blonde hair and brown eyes. He didn't look massive or anything. If she couldn't take him, Sam definitely could. And if not Sam, then definitely 'Cedes. She felt better knowing who she was looking out for.

When Santana left the dorm room and got to her car she called Mike.

"Hey Santana."

"I need you to do me a favor."

"Uh, ok. Yeah. What's up?"

"Brittany's ex boyfriend is coming up tonight, and it's not my story to tell but he's bad bad news. So if you happen to see some guy you don't know trying to talk to Brittany get her away from him. Ok? And call me right away. I will leave my phone on vibrate during the show." Mike had always suspected that Brittany had issues at home and in past relationships. But they hadn't ever really discussed it.

"Yeah. I got it. I'll do everything I can."

"Thanks Mike. I have to keep her safe." He could sense the fear in her voice. Whoever this guy was must be bad seriously bad for Brittany. And that wasn't ok by him.

"I know Santana. I've got both of your backs. Ok? Try to relax and I will see you after the show."

"Ok. Bye." They hung up and Santana went back to her apartment to get ready. She continued to text Brittany frequently.

When it was almost time for them to be back at the dance building, Mike waited outside of Brittany's dorm for her. He'd just play it off like he just wanted to walk in with her. As soon as she walked out and saw him she shook her head. "Santana called you huh?"

He ran his hands over his hair. "Yeah, she's a little worried. Which made me a little worried. No harm in walking you over right?"

"None." She smiled and they walked over and did their best not to talk about the elephant in the room. She did tell him that she'd tell him about it another time. He accepted that and asked no further questions, he was just genuinely concerned. They got into the dance building without cause and went through all of the normal preparations. She was eager for the show to start because as soon as it did, they'd be in the clear.

Santana felt completely on edge. She opted not to tell the others about what was going on, not wanting to upset them and cause them more concern then they already had at her unusual behavior. She hated him. She hated him for taking this night away from Brittany and making it about him. She hates him for causing her to focus on anything that isn't exclusively her girlfriend's big dance performance. She hates him. But she didn't see him anywhere. Maybe he'd decided not to come? Maybe he couldn't get tickets or he got lost. Because by time they were seated in their seats there was still no sign of him and Santana was grateful. She sent Brittany a quick good luck text and that they were all proud of her before putting her phone on vibrate and tucking it under her thigh where she was sure to feel it.

When the music started up for the first piece Santana really tried to focus. She wanted, when this was all said and done, to be able to talk about the pieces with Brittany, to show her that she'd paid attention to the entire thing not just her. But that didn't look like it was going to happen. She watched, but was constantly glancing around the audience anytime it was bright enough to see, just to see if she could spot him. The longer she went without seeing him, the more nervous and better she felt at the same time. She was conflicted. She wanted to be hopeful but way more than she wanted anything, she needed to keep Brittany safe. And he was the opposite of safe. She tried to watch the second piece. It didn't seem very good. It felt random and she just didn't really like it. But she knew that Brittany came next and she was determined to focus on every second of Brittany up there. The lights dimmed and a spotlight came up on stage but there was no one in it. Santana panicked internally, why wasn't Brittany there? But then the music started and the lights started to come up on the rest of the stage and there was Brittany.

Santana had noticed the song the first few seconds in. It was Kate Nash's Nicest Thing. It was one of her favorite songs. But now she loved it even more as she watched Brittany dance across the stage telling a very clear story of wanting to be loved, and then loving. Santana was spell bound. She looked so beautiful. So simple and elegant and beautiful. The most beautiful person in the world, and she was all hers. Santana vowed to never take that fact for granted. The longer she progressed into the song, the more eye contact Brittany made with her. She wondered if that was choreographed into the dance, Brittany had chosen her seat. All she knew for certain is that Brittany had taken her breath away.

Tommy was sat off to stage left. The seats were shit. But he had been a little late so there wasn't a lot he could do. Didn't matter, he wasn't here for some stupid dance thing. He was here to take Brittany back. When he saw her on stage he watched her for a few minutes before noticing that she was paying a lot of attention to someone in the audience. Focused even. He looked over to where she was looking and saw some blonde guy. He knew that must be the guy. Well, fuck that. He was going to leave at intermission and wait for her out back so that he could talk to her first. Talk or whatever he needed to do. She'd beg for him back probably. But in case she didn't, he was prepared for whatever. She was hot and didn't put up a lot of fight like some of the girls he'd met at school and he was sick of that shit.

When Brittany got off stage she was gasping for breath. She had literally danced her heart out and just sent it all over Santana. She gave it everything. But she was still buzzed. It was easily her best performance yet. Mike was right off stage to catch her in a big hug, not caring that she was dripping with sweat. "You were brilliant Brittany. Amazing." He kissed her forehead and they stood off stage watching the next piece before Mike had to get into position for his final dance. After he got done and they had a silent mini celebration back stage they decided to head outside because it was intermission, they were both done and it was so hot backstage they could barely breath.

Santana thought Mike was awesome. Not nearly as amazing as Brittany but she might be a tiny bit biased. But he was definitely good. After he got off stage the house lights started to come up. Intermission. Santana looked down to check her phone really quickly, nothing. Good. She looked up and watched people walking back towards the lobby. But then she noticed someone walking up towards one of the exits closer to the stage. Her eyes widened. She was sure it was him. She couldn't see him very well but she was positive. She got up and told the others she'd be back and headed off in the same direction. She watched the kid slip out of the door but before she could get there one of the ushers told her she couldn't go out that door and she needed to go through the lobby. She frantically tried to argue that she needed to go through that door, but he wasn't budging and she was wasting time. She turned around, and despite her four-inch heals, she ran as fast as she could up the aisle.

From the back of the house Santana's brothers watched the exchange. They had come to surprise Brittany and Santana. They wanted to support their sister's girlfriend too. But this didn't feel right. And ever the protective older brothers, they got out of their seats and followed behind her.

"Britt I gotta go grab my phone really quick before we go outside." Mike told her before heading toward the men's dressing room. He wanted to send Santana a text telling her all was well.

"Ok I will just meet you out there. You'll just be a minute right?" There was no way he'd be back there. It's not easy to get back there especially from the lobby doors and there were supposed to be ushers blocking the rear exits. She opened the door and a few of the other dancers walked past her going back in to prep for the second half. Brittany was excited for next year when she might get to be in more than one piece, but grateful that she had been given the opportunity she had. The cold air felt good against her still over heated skin. She twirled around letting her dress flow out from around her again, smiling. She really loved this. She wondered if there would be occasion for her to wear it again.

"Brittany." She stopped. Her breath caught. Not now. How did he? Don't turn around Brittany. Run. Do something.

But she couldn't. She stood there. And he walked around into her view. "Don't be rude aren't you going to say hello? A kiss maybe?" he sneered at her. That disgusting sneer on that face that she hated. She hated him. And she wasn't going to take this.

"Go away Tommy I don't want you anywhere near me." He shook his head.

"Don't be like that. I'm here to give you another chance." She started shaking. Mike would be here any second.

"I don't want any chances. I am happy now. I am seeing someone." She thought her voice sounded brave. Good. She didn't want him to think she was scared. She was, but not as scared as she thought she'd be. Mostly she was mad. And a little disgusted.

"Oh I could tell. I saw you practically drooling all over him up on stage. Was it that blonde fucker?" His voice started to rise. He was getting angry. Brittany needed to get away from him quickly. She briefly thought about running but he was faster. Wait, blonde?

"No. She's not blonde." Mistake. His eyes widened and his face started to get red.

"She? You left me for a girl?"

"I didn't leave you for anyone. I left you because of everything you did, I didn't love you. I hate you." She screamed at him.

"Now you're with some dyke?"

"DON'T CALL HER THAT!" Brittany could feel her anger rising. She was so mad. All the anger she should have felt over him was coming to the surface now and she wanted to hit him. She heard the back door open and close somewhere in the back of her mind but she was to focused.

"Bri-oh god." Mike ran down the stairs and in between the two of them. "You need to get out of here right now man or I will call the cops." But Tommy didn't even acknowledge him. Not really.

"Oh are you sleeping with this guy too?" Mike heard a growl come out of Brittany and stepped to the side to block her from going after the guy in front of him. "You little fucking whore. You disgust me. Have you slept with all of this campus already? Plus your little dyke?" The guy yelled at Brittany. Mike was gearing up to hit this fool when he felt Brittany dive under one of his arms toward the guy, but before he could catch her and pull her back, Tommy had wound up and back handed her so hard she fell straight to the ground in tears. That's when he heard one of the scariest noises he'd ever heard, Santana Lopez was here and was screaming a mixture of Spanish and English as she ran over towards them.

Santana hadn't been able to figure out how to get to the back. It was a fucking maze of bushes and everything it the world set up to stand between her and Brittany and she needed to get to Brittany now. She heard voices, what sounded like Brittany yelling, she ran towards them and got there just in time to see Brittany dive under Mikes arm and get slapped hard by the fucker stood before them. She lost her mind. She started screaming and running towards him, she stepped out of both of her heels to get to him faster when she felt something or someone grab her around the middle so hard it knocked the wind out of her. She started screaming and kicking at whoever it was to get at Brittany. Brittany who needed her.

Luis was glad Santana hadn't thought to kick her shoes off sooner because he was pretty sure without them she would have beat him over to whatever was going on. He had no idea what this was all about but he knows that his baby sister is now flailing around trying to get to Brittany who just got hit by some guy. "Guys go get him." He yelled at his other brothers.

"Way ahead of you." Gabe yelled as the rest of them ran towards Brittany, Mike, and Tommy. Brittany was only mildly aware of what was going on around her. Her ears were ringing from being hit so hard right near the temple. All of the old feelings he used to inspire in her, fear, hatred, self loathing started to creep back in. Tommy watched her on the ground before him with a satisfied smile on his face. He was winding up to kick her for good measure because she deserved it, whore.

Miguel saw Tommy's leg go back and saw what he was about to do. No fucking way. He ran faster and got there before he could kick Brittany. He grabbed him by the collar and threw him to the ground away from her. "Hell no asshole. I don't know who the fuck you think you are but you are about to be in a world of hurt." Two of his other brothers showed up at that moment picking Tommy up off the ground. He looked around like he was going to threaten them but after seeing their size and the fact that there were three, he thought better of it and turned to run.

"Oh no you coward." Diego caught him by the arm. "Let's go over here around the other side of the building and talk this out." He started to drag him away followed by the other two boys.

"Santana calm down." Santana was still fighting Luis even though she'd just seen her other brothers drag Tommy away. She needed to go after him. She needed to hurt him. Needed to protect Brittany. "Santana stop fighting me. They've got him. Brittany needs you." Brittany needs me. She thought. Brittany. She looked over at the blonde who was still kneeling on the ground with her face in her hands as Mike hovered over her unsure of what to do. Santana immediately stopped struggling and Luis dropped her. She scrambled towards Brittany, not even registering the freezing ground on her bare feet. She ran over and fell to the ground next to Brittany.

She put her hand on Brittany's back and felt Brittany flinch away from her. "Brittany it's me. Shhh. I'm here. He's gone." She whispered as comfortingly as she could through her own tears. "Baby come back to me." She reached down and gently pulled one of Brittany's hands away from her face, there was a half second of resistance before she felt Brittany look up at her, and then climb quickly into her lap burying her red face into Santana's hair. Brittany was sobbing. Santana didn't know what to do so she let Brittany cry. She held her as tight as she could and Brittany clutched desperately to her. After a few minutes Brittany's sobs started to slow.

"Did he hurt you?" she half whimpered half choked out. Santana then realized that Brittany hadn't seen her brothers. Wait. Her brothers were here. So many questions.

"No. Miguel Gabe and Diego took him away. You're ok. They will protect both of us." Brittany nodded and then lifted her hand to where Tommy had slapped her. "I'm so sorry he hit you and I wasn't here to stop him baby." Santana felt tears well up in her eyes again. Brittany took a minute to just look at her before she pressed her lips gently to trembling pouting ones and shook her head. She knew better than to tell Santana that it wasn't her job to protect her, because she gets it. If Tommy had hit Santana, she would have killed him. She is there to protect Santana too. She gets it. She also gets that if she would kill him for hitting her, then she should probably be just as angry about getting hit herself. But she was proud. She had stood up to him. She'd only gotten hit because she went after him. He probably would have hit her anyway, but it was because she was brave that it happened.

"I probably shouldn't have lunged at him."

"Yeah, why did you do that?"

"He was calling me a whore and calling you names. I wasn't going to let him do that." Brittany sniffed, still trying to stop the tears. She felt ok. There was lingering fear but she knew she could stand up for herself. And when he knocked her down, there were lots of other people here to stand up for her too. She wiped the tears away from her eyes before reaching forward and wiping them from Santana's eyes too.

"Does it hurt?" Brittany touched the tender spot at the side of her head and nodded her head yes. "I want to kill him. I should have been here, but I'm proud of you."

"You couldn't have known, and as soon as you knew you were here. With your brothers? When did they get here?"

"No idea. We'll have to ask them. Are you ok Brittany?"

"I'm a little shook up, but I'm ok."

"Do you want me to take you home, we can cuddle. I'll make hot chocolate." Brittany shook her head no.

"No. He's not ruining anything else for me. I'm going to go do curtain call, and ask your brothers why they are here. And then I'm going to say hi to Sam and 'Cedes and Quinn, and then you and I are going to New York City for our epic date. Just as planned. He's not ruining anything. Ok?'

"Ok B." Santana kissed Brittany gently before taking her face into her hands and examining where he had hit her. It might bruise, but she'd be fine. She was saying she was ok, and Santana had to believe her. And she was right, he shouldn't get to ruin anything for them. They sat for a few more minutes, everyone around them trying to not interrupt the moment between them as Santana held Brittany to her as tight as she could.

"I'm sorry Britt, San, but curtain call is coming soon." Mike said hesitantly. He'd heard her say she wanted to go back out for it and didn't want her to miss the opportunity. She deserved some applause.

"Can you see a mark? Do I have cry eyes?" She asked as Santana pulled her to her feet, they were both shivering but had at some point that they were only vaguely aware of, been wrapped in two giant coats that smelled of her brothers. She pulled Brittany's hair so it covered the red spot on her face, but not before she placed a gentle kiss to it.

"This is gross I'm sorry but it has to be done." She licked both of her thumbs and ran them under Brittany's eyes to get the smudged makeup off. After she'd done the best she could to make Brittany look like she hadn't been crying she and mike went back inside. "Do you guys know where my shoes are?" Miguel handed them to her. They looked tiny in his hands. When she was little, she had this idea that her big brothers would, by magic or super hero powers she wasn't sure which, always be there when she needed them to be. She wasn't wrong she guesses. She takes Luis's hand, which still and has always dwarfed hers. "I didn't hurt you did I?"

"You've got some pretty powerful kicks baby sis, but no. I'm ok. Lets see if we can't get back in to clap for Brittany?" And they, as stealthily as four giant men can, snuck into the side entrance just in time to see the lights come back up and people start lining up. Santana politely clapped for the first two groups, but as soon as Brittany came on she opened her mouth to cheer as loud as she could but was drowned out by the sea of noise that was her brothers. She thought she might have never loved them more as she did listening to them cheer for Brittany just as loud as they cheered for her.

Brittany looked out into the audience and saw Sam, Quinn, and Mercedes stand up and clap for her with slightly confused expressions. And she heard the roar of sound that was Santana and her brothers. But what she didn't expect was lots of other people that she didn't know slowly rising and giving her a standing ovation. She smiled as big as she could before heading back to let everyone else take their bows. Why they were waiting out back for Brittany as planned, Santana asked something that she hadn't thought about yet. "Where's Tommy?"

"Oh you don't have to worry about that sis. We suspect when he wakes up sometime tomorrow in his car, he'll be apt to never speak to her again. And if he comes anywhere near her, you call me. You hear me? Seriously Santana, if you think either of you are ever in danger, from anything, you have to call us. Ok? That's why you have big brothers so that we can help stop things like this from happening." Apparently protectiveness was genetic. When Brittany came out with Mike they all cheered for her again. Sam had tried to ask questions but Santana had told him that she'd talk to him about it after break, and that everything was ok. All three of them had nodded. Brittany smiled and ran down the stairs to hug them all.

Everyone told her and Mike how amazing she was, and she was glad that Brittany was getting all the praise she deserved but she desperately wanted to leave and take Brittany away from this place. They needed it.

Her brothers, turns out, had come up to surprise her and Brittany and to see the dance concert. Which is a good thing, Brittany thinks, because without them she thinks Santana might have gotten hurt and she couldn't live with that. But she pushed bad thoughts out. There was no need for them. Everything was ok, she just had to keep telling herself that. Sam, Quinn, and Mercedes left after the girls promised to text them once they got to the hotel ok. Luis offered to follow them to the hotel in case anything went wrong but Santana assured them they would be fine and would call if anything were to come up. Brittany hugged them and told them thank you and she was glad to be spending the holiday with them. They left too. Santana opened the passenger door for Brittany and kissed her gently before closing the door. They stopped at her dorm to grab her bag and started the drive to New York, and their hotel.

The drive there didn't feel nearly as long as it was. They'd stopped and got drive through food because Santana could hear Brittany's stomach growling. They sang to each other and laughed and talked about nothing serious. The hotel was beautiful. Brittany swore she'd come to the lobby to look around tomorrow, but tonight, she only wanted to look at Santana. When they got up to the room Brittany slipped the lock over on the door. "You ready for bed B? I bet you're tired."

She turned around and was met with a look from Brittany that said very clearly that she was not tired. "I want to shower." She responded. Santana nodded. She hoped she meant together, that's what she'd wanted it to mean but she also felt bad suggesting anything like that after the night Brittany had just had. "Shower with me?" Questions answered.

Brittany walked over without waiting for an answer and peeled Santana's coat off of her shoulders before unzipping the zipper. Santana stepped out of her own heals as Brittany pulled the tight dress down her body. She hadn't been wearing a bra, so now she stood in front of Brittany in just her compression shorts. She spun Brittany around and unzipped her dress as well before pulling it from Brittany and unhooking her bra. They helped each other out of the rest of their clothes before Brittany took Santana's hand and pulled her into the gorgeous bathroom. Brittany started the shower that was big enough for at least five people and pulled Santana in once the water was a good temperature.

They took their time washing each other's hair and lovingly massaging skin with soap until they were both clean. They had been touching and kissing the entire time, so it was no surprise that Santana was hard. Brittany hadn't avoided touching her dick, but she hadn't touched her yet in the way that Santana wanted her too. Then she felt Brittany subtly pushing her into a corner of the shower stall and lowering herself to the ground in front of Santana. Seeing her like this would never ever be any less exciting than it is right now, she thought. She gasped as Brittany grasped her lightly and gave her shaft a few pumps before, while looking into Santana's eyes the entire time, took her tip into her mouth sucking gently. "Fuck Britt." It had been too long. Brittany took more of her into her mouth, sucking firmly. Santana was glad Brittany didn't appear to be in a teasing mood. She sucked as much of her into her mouth as she could, still pumping the base, and gently stroking her balls. "God Britt don't stop." Brittany shook her head to indicate no, she had no intentions of stopping.

Santana had herself braced against the wall with both hands trying to keep from cumming too quickly because she never wanted this to stop. Brittany wasn't complaining. She loved having Santana in her mouth. She loved the way she tasted, she loved the sound that she made, she loved how all of Santana's muscles were tensed in her efforts to not cum. She loved everything about it. But before to long Santana couldn't stop herself. "Gon cum B" She said through gritted teeth, knowing by now that Brittany preferred to swallow. Brittany increased her suction and felt Santana's cock jerk and then her hot cum spill into her mouth as she sucked down every drop. "God B." Santana moaned as she started to slip down the wall. Brittany released her softened cock and took Santana into her arms, helping to lower her to the ground. She held her for a few minutes before Santana became coherent again. "Amazing. You. are. amazing." She punctuated each word with a kiss. Then she, ungracefully but without care, got back up and held out her hand to help Brittany up. She shut the water off and pressed Brittany up against the wall and kissing her fiercely. "Bed. Now." Brittany nodded.

They got onto the bed, over top of the covers, and Santana quickly climbed on top of Brittany, who pulled her down into a kiss. She loved this. Feeling Santana's full weight on top of her as their tongues tangled together in a languid kiss. She had no idea how much time had passed since they'd gotten into bed but she could feel the need deep in her stomach as she started to roll her hips trying to get any kind of friction. Santana took the hint and quickly began to kiss her way down Brittany's neck and to her collarbone. She was anxious to taste her again. They hadn't been able to since the first time and she desperately wanted to, She quickly reached the swell of Brittany's breast and took a nipple into her mouth and sucked tenderly. She wanted this to be gentle and good for Brittany. She deserved it. She switched to the other breast and took the other nipple into her mouth as she rolled the now moist nipple between her finger and thumb. Brittany was panting and rolling her body underneath Santana. She could feel how much Brittany needed her. She continued her journey down as to give Brittany want she wanted. She traced the line down her abdomen with the tip of her tongue, circling her belly button before gently dipping in. Santana heard her take a sharp breath. Someday, Santana swore she'd get to a place where she could stand to tease Brittany. But right now she wanted to please her so bad the idea of teasing her was too much.

When Brittany felt Santana's hot breath on her slit she rolled her hips trying once again to get any friction. She wanted to tell Santana not to tease her but she could barely use her words. "Please" was all that came out. She sounded so desperate. Santana used her fingers to spread Brittany and laid a kiss onto her clit. "Ungh" Brittany grunted at the contact. Needing more. Santana swirled her tongue around her clit before licking down to her center, and then back up. She had to hold Brittany's hips down in order to maintain contact.

"San please" Brittany needed to cum. It had been building in her since they had gotten in the car. She nearly came while sucking Santana off. She'd been close since the first kiss to her clit. She loved how gentle and soft it felt. But she desperately wanted to cum. "Fingers."

Santana got the hint and instead of fingering her with one finger first, she slid two in. "Oh god." Brittany grunted, matching Santana's thrusts with the movement of her hips. Santana felt her walls flutter and she knew she was close. She flicked her clit quickly a few times with her tongue and then sucked gently. She continued to repeat the pattern until she felt Brittany's walls start to tighten. "Cum for me baby" she rasped into the dimly lit room. Brittany moaned Santana's name and Santana sucked gently while she continued to finger her through her orgasm. After Brittany collapsed Santana gently licked her swollen folds a few more times before crawling back up and taking her into her arms. She held her tight and tried to ignore her own throbbing erection.

Once the aftershocks started to fade, she looked up to see Santana gazing lovingly at her. There was no mistaking the emotions playing behind her eyes and it made Brittany want more. "I want you."

"You have me." Santana kissed Brittany gently.

"No. I want you inside of me." Santana's eyes snapped open wide and if Brittany hadn't wanted it so badly she might have laughed. "Please. I'm ready. Are you ready?" Santana swallowed and nodded. She was ready. She wanted this. She wanted to make love to Brittany. She kissed her again, passionately. Trying to convey everything in the kiss that she has wanted to say before they'd gotten to this point. Brittany felt it.

Santana untangled herself from Brittany, who laid herself flat again, spreading her legs. Santana gulped, she was nervous. She wanted to be amazing. But she'd only done this once and it was nothing like this. Brittany reached up and wrapped her arms around Santana's neck, playing with the little hairs she could reach. She nodded at Santana, who had settled herself between Brittany's hips. She could feel the precum against her still wet folds.

"Wait." Santana stopped. She should have double-checked that Brittany was ready because now she's gone to far to fast. "I have to tell you something first. Before we do this." Santana was confused but nodded her head indicating to Brittany that she should continue. "You don't have to say anything back. Please don't feel obligated at all." Brittany took a deep breath. "I love you Santana. I do. More than anything or anyone ever." She watched Santana's eyes fill with tears. "Don't cry." She whispered.

"I'm just happy. So so happy Brittany. I love you too. I'm in love with you. So in love with you." She leaned down and captured Brittany's lips with her own again. After kissing tenderly for a few minutes, she felt Brittany reach down between them and gently guide her toward her opening. Santana nodded and slowly pressed her hips down and in, slipping between Brittany's folds, and past the ring of muscle. "Are you ok?" She panted into Brittany's ear. Brittany's eyes were closed shut and her nose was scrunched a little, she nodded and pressed her hands into the small of Santana's back urging her to keep going. It took every ounce of reserve she had to not just slide all the way in, but she refused to hurt Brittany. She took her cues from Brittany's hands. Ifs he pushed on her back, she'd keep going, if she eased up, she stopped. Shortly though, she felt herself press against Brittany and she was all the way in. "Are you ok?"

"Mhmm. Can I have a second?"

"You can have as much time as you want." She did would she could to make Brittany less tense. Kissing her and licking her neck. She eventually felt the tension in Brittany's body ease and saw her eyes open. "I feel so full." She kissed Brittany again. What started out as a slow kiss became heated quickly. Santana felt Brittany start to rock under her so she started to gently move in and out. She was so tight and wet and hot. She never wanted to be anywhere else but inside of Brittany. She felt so close to her, like nothing could ever pull them apart. She looked deep into Brittany's eyes and couldn't stop the emotions from flowing out of her. "I love you" she panted as she continued thrusting in and out of Brittany.

"I love you too. You feel so good inside me Santana." She kissed her. "Faster" Brittany urged her. And Santana quickened her pace. She would pull almost all the way out before quickly pushing back in. "Uh baby so good." She wrapped one of her legs around Santana's waist so that she could go deeper. Santana felt the tell tale stirrings in her abdomen and knew she wasn't going to last too much longer. She looked into Brittany's eyes to tell her but she got distracted by how beautiful she looked with her eyes half shut, pupils blown with lust and love. Her lips parted, rocking with the force of Santana's thrusts as well as her own. "So good." Brittany moaned again. Santana loved the incoherent noises she was making. She picked up the pace before she realized she wasn't going to be able to hold back much longer.

"Britt I'm gonna cum" She was almost panicked when she said it. Brittany knew it was because Santana was worried caus she hadn't yet, but Brittany wasn't concerned about that. So she locked both legs behind Santana and pressed her inside of her as deep as she could before leaning up and kissing her deeply. A few small thrusts later and she felt Santana come inside of her. Brittany doesn't think she's ever seen anything as beautiful or as feminine as Santana cumming on top of her. Shaking with tears in her eyes. Once she felt Santana's cock start to soften, she pulled Santana down on top of her and flipped them on to their side so she was holding her tightly to her chest.

"My beautiful girlfriend. I love you." Brittany hummed softly into Santana's ear as Santana recovered. After about ten minutes she felt Santana start to stir and her now softened cock slipped out of her, she pouted at the empty feeling but knew that she had Santana, and they could do this whenever they wanted. She heard Santana mumble something into her chest but couldn't quite make out what it was. "What baby?"

"You didn't cum." Santana pouted.

"No. But that's ok. I don't care. It wasn't about that. This could not have been a better evening, not for anything. I made love to my girlfriend." Santana smiled and buried her face back into Brittany's chest.

"I love you. I want to say it a thousand times. I've wanted to say it for so long." Brittany giggled with happiness hearing the words come out of Santana's mouth.

"I love you too. And I did too. I'm so glad I'm here with you."

"Me too baby. Can I hold you? Roll over." Brittany did, loving feeling Santana's arms surround her. "Are you still feeling ok after what happened tonight?"

Brittany settled herself into Santana's arms and took a second to answer truthfully. "I think I am. I was scared. The idea that he thinks he can just show up in my life now is scary."

"He won't again. My brothers straightened him out. Or crunched him up. One of the two." Brittany smiled at Santana's joke. " And I will protect you when I can." Brittany nodded. She wasn't lying. She was ok. She didn't know when the fear of him would completely fade but she was ok.

"Just hold me ok?"

"Just try stopping me." Santana kissed her shoulder as she tightened her arms. "I love you Britt."

Brittany's face broke out into a smile that Santana couldn't see but she could her when Brittany responded, "I love you too. Hearing that is never going to not make my heart flutter."

"Good." Brittany turned herself around so she could lay her head on Santana's chest and they wrapped all their limbs together so that Brittany forgot what was her and what was Santana, and she thought that was probably ok.

* * *

**AN:** Longest chapter so far. I hope you guys liked it and please please let me know what you thought.

Also: find link to the song that Brittany dances to on my tumblr.

klikeszombies . tumblr . com

And one last thing.

I think I need a beta. For sure now. So if anyone is interested, please let me know via PM. I'm looking for someone kind of specific and I'd like to have a few conversations before I am like YEAH LET'S DO THIS! But, yeah. Let me know.

Thank you for reviewing and for loving the story.


	13. Chapter 13

**AN: **This is kind of fillery. But I wanted to get something out to you guys while I'm working on the outline and fate of the rest of this story. Thanks for your patience. The next chapter will cover most of/all of break and then back to school. I love your suggestions and I really like when I can incorporate them into the story so please feel free to keep them coming.

TRIGGER WARNING: Flashback to some noncon. Not graphic. Not between Brittany and Santana at all. Ever. Promise.

* * *

Santana woke up, and she had no idea what time it was but she knew it was still dark, she knew that she still had a very naked Brittany wrapped around her, and she was so thirsty she might die. She tried to ignore it for as long as she could which was about a minute. She didn't want to wiggle her way out of the hold Brittany had on her but if she didn't get some water she'd never fall back asleep. So after a few minutes of untangling limbs, and leaving kisses all over her, she climbed out of the giant bed and went into the bathroom.

Brittany felt Santana moving her limbs around gently and figured out pretty quickly that she was trying to get out of bed. She could have just rolled over but it was way more fun to make Santana try to move her without waking her. She was also pretty fond of the little kisses she was leaving on her face, neck, and arms. Once Santana managed to extract herself without the continual distraction of Brittany's naked body she walked towards the bathroom. Brittany watched, her being awake still unnoticed. She watched as Santana flipped on the bathroom light and got some water. And as Santana turned around to look at something, she looked at her perfect breasts and toned muscles and her soft cock resting on her balls between her legs. Even soft it turned Brittany on. "I love you like this. I love you always. But this you is my favorite."

Santana was only a little startled when Brittany started to talk. But her heart warmed to her words. She smiled gently. "What do you mean?"

"Just natural and happy and carefree. When you feel like you don't have to hide anything." She could feel herself getting turned on just watching Santana standing there. "I want you to know that having you inside of me was the most amazing feeling I've ever had." She watched the subtle shift in Santana. "I wish I could have that feeling all the time." Santana could feel herself getting stiff. Brittany noticed too. "And when you came inside of me. God Santana. Knowing that I'd made you feel like that. I can't even explain it. Just thinking about it makes me wet."

Santana swallows thickly. "Touch yourself Britt. Let me see." Brittany thinks for anyone else she'd never be able to. But for Santana, she leans back onto the pillows, bathed only in the light from the bathroom, and spreads her legs. Santana can see Brittany's arousal coating her folds already. She subconsciously licks her lips, which turns Brittany on even more. Brittany slowly runs her hand down her body and cups herself before dipping one of her fingers through her folds, gathering her own juices, before circling her clit the way she likes when Santana does. It doesn't feel the same. It doesn't feel bad though but the look Santana is giving her is turning her on more than almost anything. She watches Santana reach down and palm her now hard dick tugging on it a few times.

"I have never seen anything hotter than this" Santana's voice is more raspy than usual and she's having a hard time not diving onto the bed. Brittany nods and then turns it up a notch. She spreads herself before pushing her finger inside. It's nothing compared to Santana but she can see Santana trembling with the effort to not get on the bed with her.

"Baby. I need you inside of me." Brittany whined. She was surprised Santana had lasted so long but she didn't want to wait anymore. Santana didn't either, if her speed in which she made in onto the bed was any indication. Santana climbed on top of Brittany, she grabbed the hand that had previously been rubbing her clit and pulled it to her pouty lips and sucked Brittany's finger into her mouth savoring the flavor she had come to know and love. The act had Brittany almost to the point of begging Santana to fill her. She felt more wetness pool between her legs. "Please Santana." When Santana heard the desperation in her girlfriends voice she immediately wanted to give in. She sat back on her heels and lined herself up and started to push inside. Immediately feeling how amazing Brittany felt around her again.

"God Brittany" She moaned as she pushed slowly in. "So tight". She felt amazing. So wet. It felt like Brittany was made for her. They were made to fit together like this. When she felt herself press completely into Brittany's body, she leaned forward so she was lying over top of Brittany, braced up by her arms and kissed Brittany fully on the mouth. Brittany moaned into her mouth as she ran her hands up and down Santana's ribs. While continuing to thrust in and out of Brittany at a steady pace, she kissed her way down her neck to where her breasts were bouncing, to take a pink nipple into her mouth and suck gently.

Brittany can hardly form words as she focuses on the feeling of her nipple in Santana's mouth and the feeling of her hard cock sliding in and out of her. She couldn't form words but she couldn't stay quiet either. She gently guided Santana back up to kiss her again, needing to breathe the same air. Santana's heavy breasts pressed into her own making Brittany moan into her lover's mouth. "Baby I want you to cum too this time." Santana says breathlessly, almost as if it's a question. What does she need to do to make Brittany cum.

Brittany thinks if Santana would rub her clit she might explode. She tries to form the words to tell her that. "San. So good. Touch clit." Santana immediately lifts her body higher and snakes one of her hands between their bodies and dips her finger between Brittany's folds. She can feel herself going in and out and she has to grit her teeth to stop herself from cumming to early at the sensation. She needs Brittany to cum too. She wants to make her feel good more than she wants anything. She starts making tight circles around Brittany's swollen clit. Brittany throws her head back and moans Santana's name while digging her fingers into the muscles of Santana's shoulders. She speeds up the circles she's making around Brittany's clit because she's going to explode and collapse any second. "Oh God baby" Brittany's fingers tighten, not quite painful, but close.

"Fuck Brittany" Santana says through gritted teeth as she starts to speed up her thrusting. She can feel Brittany getting tighter around her.

"Gonna. Uh. Cum" Brittany screams. And then Santana feels Brittany's muscles convulsing around her still thrusting dick and Brittany arches underneath her. Santana slows her circles around her now twitching clit and works her cock into Brittany with slower deeper thrusts, feeling her balls tighten, knowing she's going to explode any second. After a few more thrusts, while watching Brittany come down beautifully below her, she pushes into her as deep as she can and feels herself explode into her.

Brittany feels Santana's hot cum inside of her and smiles. She can hardly move her body feels so good. Santana kisses Brittany's blissed out face and collapses on top of her, unable to hold herself up anymore. She pulls herself gently out and notes how wet both Brittany and the sheets beneath her are. Brittany hardly seems to notice, as she seems to have gone into some sort of sex coma. Santana smiles, proud that she can make Brittany feel that way and rolls off of her. The motion, combined with the cold air that hits her damp body causes Brittany to pout. "Where?" She mumbles.

"Come here baby. We kind of made a mess." Santana laughs and scoops Brittany into her arms and pulls her into her body away from the wet spot and covers them both with the blanket because she can feel Brittany trembling slightly.

"Most amazing sex ever." Brittany mumbles into her neck where she has her face pressed. Santana nods in agreement, running her fingers over every bit of naked skin she can reach. She doesn't think she'll ever feel less lucky that she gets Brittany in this way, and that Brittany loves her back. She feels her eyes sting but she refuses to cry even happy tears, she doesn't want to upset Brittany.

"I love making love to you Brittany." Santana whispers. Brittany hears how heart achingly honest that statement is. But then, "Shit that was cheesy. I'm sorry." Santana covers. Still scared that the depth of her feelings is going to somehow chase Brittany away.

Brittany pulls her face away from Santana's warm neck to look into her eyes. "I love making love to you too. You don't need to take back beautiful things that you say. I love hearing them." She kisses Santana's lips softly. She continues in a near whisper "I love the way my body feels after you make me feel like that. Like it's humming and like the only thing it wants is to be as close to you as possible. I never ever thought sex could feel like this." She keeps laying gentle kisses on Santana's neck and ear. She feels Santana's arms and legs tighten their hold on her and she settles in, tucking her head gently under Santana's chin so she can hear her heart beat.

"I'm glad this night turned out so perfect. It could have gone so wrong." Santana tried not to think of what could have happened to Brittany tonight. Almost as though she can read her thoughts though, Brittany tries to ease her racing mind.

"Don't think about it baby. It's over, he'll be on his way back home. And we're here together and perfect." Santana kisses the top of Brittany's head as a way of agreeing.

"Do you think he'll tell your parents what happened? What if he tells them you're dating a girl?" The thought hit Santana rather suddenly, and she can't help but get nervous again.

"Then he tells them. I'm not hiding anything from them, it just hasn't come up yet. We don't really talk for more than a few minutes at a time. But if he tells them then I'll deal with it. I don't think he will though."

"Why not?"

"He'll be embarrassed that I've moved on and am ok. Also that he got beat up. He will either lie and say he never came, or say he decided he wasn't ready to take me back and that I need to work a little harder."

"He is such a dick Britt. Why did you date him in the first place?"

"Everyone wanted me too. I was sick of being nothing but a disappointment to my family and they seemed so happy that we'd gotten together. It wasn't too bad at first. He made me make out with him in front of his friends but that was pretty much it. But then it got worse as you know."

"Why did you stay?"

"Like I said I didn't want to disappoint anyone. And at some point, he and my family managed to convince me I needed him. That nobody else would love me. Sometimes it felt like everything I knew was based around this relationship. It felt like the only thing my parents even liked about me was him. And then I got scared to leave him because I didn't know what he would do."

"Why did you? What changed?" Santana asked against her better judgment, knowing that the answer would make her mad. She felt Brittany stiffen in her arms. "You don't have to tell me if you don't want to. But no matter what it is it wouldn't change anything with us."

"I left him because he hurt me again and it was the last straw. I was on my period and he came to my house and wanted to have sex. I told him I was and he got mad. But then said it's ok because I could just blow him. But I didn't want to do that either so I told him I had a sore throat. Then he got really mad and told me that that was to bad because he was already turned on and once guys got turned on they can't stop. But I didn't want to do anything so I went to get up and go downstairs because he wouldn't do anything in front of my parents. But he grabbed me and pushed me on the bed on my stomach and pulled my pants down. I tried to kick him but couldn't get my leg back like that." Santana felt her stomach turning as Brittany continued her story. But she wanted Brittany to have the opportunity to get it all out. And she didn't want to stop because that would mean finishing the story another time, and she didn't think she'd be able to handle hearing the pain in Brittany's voice again.

"He tried to…have anal sex with me. It hurt so bad but he barely even got anywhere before I managed to move enough to get him off of me. He slapped me and I pulled up my pants and ran downstairs. He followed me and I told him to get out and I never wanted to see him again. That I was done. I couldn't do it anymore." She could feel Brittany shaking now too. Even though she couldn't see her face she could hear the tears in her voice. She held her even tighter, stroking her hair and back. Pressing kisses to her hair to try and sooth Brittany in any way she could. And by soothing Brittany and making her feel safe, hopefully sooth herself a little.

"My mom was there." Brittany sniffed. "She heard me tell him I was done. After he left my mom told me that whatever he did wasn't an excuse to break up. Give it a day or two, and call him and maybe if I'm lucky he'll take me back. I never felt more unloved in that moment." Brittany was full on sobbing now. "I'm sorry I'm ruining all the good feelings."

"You aren't baby. Shhhh. You aren't." Santana adjusted herself so that she was now lying eye to eye with Brittany. "I hate him. That's hardly worth mentioning. And if I ever see him again, the only thing that will prevent me from killing him is the thought that I'd go to jail and not be able to hold and see you anymore. But I don't even want to waste energy on those bad feelings. I do want to tell you that I will never hurt you. Not like that, not in any way. Ever. Ok?"

"I know." Brittany sniffs.

"I know we have talked about it but I want to say it again. This" she runs her and up Brittany's side. "This is your body. And I love it. And I love making you feel good. And I love the way you make me feel. But it is your body baby. Yours. And if you ever, ever even just kind of don't want to do anything, that will always be ok. Even if we go a really long time. That's ok. Because it's your body, and I will never ever abuse that. Ok?" Brittany nods and smiles. "Not only that. But I will always do what I can to protect you. I will always try and keep you safe. I want you to always feel safe with me."

"I feel safer like this, in your arms, than I ever have in my life."

"Good. Get used to it." Brittany smiled a little. "Because I have absolutely no intentions of letting you go." She tickles her fingers along Brittany's ribs a little, Brittany giggles, effectively lightening the mood slightly. "I love you."

"I love you. A million times over." Santana could feel the heaviness of the conversation weighing on them but not in a bad way. It felt like trust and bad pasts and a plea from Brittany to please keep her safe all wrapped together. So she did what her body was telling her to do and pulled Brittany into her again and wrapped her arms and legs around her tucking her into her body as close and as protected as she could.

"We should try and go back to sleep."

"Tell me a happy story first?"

"Ok. Like a for real story? Something that has happened? Or make one up?" Brittany yawned before answering.

"Real. This time." Santana was happy to feel Brittany's tense body relaxing into her.

"Ok. Ummm. So, when I was little, and my parents had decided to raise me as a girl I was really scared my brothers weren't going to get it. I was old enough to know that it wasn't the most normal thing. So on the way home from the doctors, where we had kind of made it final, I asked my parents what we were going to do. My dad told me not to worry about it, and that he would take them to dinner and tell them. I guess they knew on some level that something was different about me, because I'd been telling them I was a girl but they were all so much older than me and I think they just thought I was confused. I was so scared they were going to make fun of me and I loved them so much. So my dad took them to dinner, and my mom took me shopping for some new clothes and to dinner. And I came home and all I wanted to do was try on all of my new clothes but I was scared about what my brothers were going to say. Caus I knew my dad had talked to them."

"I love your brothers."

"Me too baby. So when I got home, my mom carried my stuff up to my room and put my bags in there and I went to see if I could find any of them. I found Luis in his room, and he had a baby doll. And I asked him what he was doing. And he told me he was trying to learn how to braid hair, since he had a little sister and all, he might need to know. And I was only five, but I knew for sure that I was the luckiest, now little girl, in the world. He picked me up and hugged me tight and sat back on the bed and said he loved me and everything was ok. I remember asking him if I was still his favorite buddy. Caus he always called me that. And he told me that I would always be his favorite buddy. I told him that I was nervous to find my other brothers. I was close with all of them but I'd always been the most close with Luis. So he took my hand and he and I went to the game room where the other three were playing video games. And I walked in and Diego just looked over at me and said hey baby sis. Want to play with us? And I just looked at Luis who nodded and then I ran over and Miguel pulled me into his lap like he always had and handed me his remote even though he knew I'd kill his guy right away. And that was it. It was never weird or difficult to be around them. But we never really ignored the situation either. I was a girl, which became even abundantly more obvious when my body started developing. But I still had a penis. And they explained boners to me. And Luis taught me about condoms and other birth control that other girls would have once it became clear that I definitely liked girls. They have been amazing my whole life. I don't ever even remember them being mean like a lot of boys are. They were always amazing with me."

By the end of the story Brittany's heart felt significantly lighter. "They are amazing. And they helped me even though they don't know me that well."

"Babe my brothers love you. And once they decide they love you they'll protect you no matter what. They're the same way with Quinn."

"Thanks for telling me about them." Brittany yawned and closed her eyes, feeling the signs of sleep hit her body.

"Anytime love."

"Wait. Did Luis ever learn to braid hair?"

"He totally did. Braids hair better than almost anyone I know." Brittany could hear the smile in Santana's voice and pressed her lips to whatever skin was closest to her lips. They mumbled their I love yous before drifting off to sleep again. Bad mood settled, and excited for the rest of break.


	14. Chapter 14

**AN:** Welcome to the next installment. It's longer than anticipated but full of kind of important things. So, I hope you enjoy it.

BUT! I want to introduce my shiny brand new beta. IloveUbers. She's pretty wonderful. We've got some pretty excellent stuff worked out and in store for you guys. So, say hi to her.

Read. Enjoy.

* * *

Movement wakes Brittany in the morning. After a second of thinking Santana must be awake she realizes that she is still very much asleep. The movement she had felt was Santana tightening her arms around her waist. She buried her nose into her girlfriend's neck and inhaled. She felt warm, loved, and safe in Santana's arms. She pressed herself in as tight as she could, breasts pressed together, tan skin contrasting beautifully with her own pale skin. She felt amazing after last night. They had given themselves to each other. She had opened herself up for Santana in a way that she had thought she never wanted to do again. But now she couldn't wait. The feeling of complete trust that she had in Santana felt as good as the physical feelings that she had gotten. Santana would never hurt her. She would never hurt Santana. They loved each other.

After laying for a while listening to Santana breathe and enjoying the feel of her warm skin she remembered that they had to be checked out by 11:00am. She carefully propped herself up enough to look at the clock that was on the table on the other side of Santana. Just after 10:00. They both definitely needed to shower and Santana took forever to get ready sometimes. She brushed her dark hair out of her face and traced pouty lips gently with the tip of her finger before leaning down and kissing her gently. She kept kissing until she felt Santana start to respond and deepen the kiss. After a few seconds they pulled apart. "Good morning love." Santana's voice still raspy with sleep.

"Good morning." She leaned down and ran the tip of her nose up the bridge of Santana's before kissing her forehead. "Sorry I woke you but we have to get up."

"Don't ever apologize for a wakeup call like that." Santana grinned before pulling her back down into a kiss. Brittany felt her body begin to respond to Santana's lips and tongue so she pulled away gently.

"We definitely don't have time for that. You shower first so you have time to do your hair. I'm going to go get you some coffee." Brittany kissed her once more before reluctantly pulling herself out of Santana's embrace.

"You are too good to me." She playfully smacked Brittany's butt as she climbed out of bed. Brittany squealed and Santana fell into a fit of laughter that quickly faded away as her eyes roamed her naked body. "Babe I can't believe I'm saying this but please put clothes on or we aren't leaving this room." Brittany shook her head but put on a mixture of Santana's clothing and her own. She loved wearing Santana's clothes almost as much as Santana loved seeing her in them.

"Get in the shower. I'll be back in a few minutes." She walked over to Santana before shyly looking into her eyes. "I love you."  
"I love you too." Santana returned, before kissing her sweetly, Brittany bit her bottom lip before turning and walking out of the room with a last backward glance at Santana.

After exploring the lobby for a few minutes then running to Starbucks to get Santana some coffee and a couple of muffins she gets back to the room . She hears the hair dryer and Santana singing something she can't make out the words to. She sets the muffins down and goes into the bathroom. Santana sees her in the mirror and Brittany kisses her back above the towel before pulling her own clothes off. She notices Santana is staring and the blow dryer has stopped moving and is just pointing at one spot. "You're going to burn yourself. You can look at this any time" she gestures up and down her body "but right now you need to get ready. I set your coffee and breakfast on the desk." She winks at Santana before stepping into the shower and closing the curtain.

Hotel check out had always been extremely stressful when she traveled with her family. Four brothers who often act like overgrown children will do that. But with Brittany things were surprisingly easy. They worked together seamlessly to shower, get breakfast, pack, and get the car loaded and only ended up leaving a few minutes late because of a brief but satisfying make out session up against the door. Brittany instigated it. Sort of. After leaving a generous tip with the valet, Santana confirms that they can just leave their car there while they explore the city before driving to her house, which is less than an hour away on Staten Island depending on the traffic.

"Ok babe. Remember we can't get back too late tonight, but we can come to the city another day if you want, or we can come back and spend a weekend here whenever you want. So we don't need to cram absolutely everything in. Ok?"

"Uh-huh" Brittany was listening. Really she was. But she was also distracted by all of the sounds and colors and just sheer quantity of people in Times Square. Santana tightened her hold on Brittany's hand and watched where they were going enough for both of them. She'd grown up here, and like most native New Yorkers, weren't huge fans of Times Square. But she knew Brittany would love it, and it had only been a few blocks from their hotel. They wove their way through the people, Santana throwing in random information here and there, and Brittany bouncing up and down every time she saw an advertisement for another show she wanted to see but had never had the opportunity. Santana mentally noted every one so she could ask her brother Gabe who had a few connections. "Oh we need to eat bagels for breakfast! They are the best here. Rachel told me it's the water!"

"You already ate breakfast babe. And it's almost noon." Brittany started to pout but before it could even fully come out Santana headed it off. "But there is an excellent bagel place over here so I guess we could split one." Brittany's answering smile would make it worth the line they were about to stand in to get breakfast part two.

Santana thinks it'll never make sense to her the quantity of food Brittany manages to put into her body and still look the way she does. Dancing helps, she knows. But Brittany also just literally exudes energy. She vibrates with excitement over seemingly little things. She dances when she walks. She is the purest kind of energy, Santana thinks. And knows that her life is brighter for having Brittany in it. But she eats. A lot. After bagels (which Brittany finished part of Santana's) there was a pretzel that they "shared". And then a hot dog that she had to have because it was part of the experience. But now she was sipping lemonade as they made their way to the subway having explored Times Square enough for today. Brittany made Santana promise to bring her back, and even though she didn't like it, she would a million times if Brittany wanted, and after a few texts to Gabe those plans were already set in motion.

The subway was…an experience. Having ridden it her entire life, Santana thought they were disgusting and for the most part wrought with inconvenience. Brittany loved it. She wanted to get her own subway card instead of just swiping Santana's. It took her a minute to figure out and Santana spent the time glaring at anyone that even looked like they were about to say something to her very happy girlfriend. She kept her hand pressed protectively to the small of her back and helped only when Brittany asked. They finally got on the subway headed towards their next destination hands clasped together, Brittany already asking about dinner.

After a few stops in other places, complete with more food, a few souvenir purchases that made Santana laugh, they ended up at a place Brittany hadn't even known she desperately wanted to go to, FAO Schwarz. Santana couldn't help but laugh when Brittany grabbed her hand and pulled her along more excited than any of the children around her. They spent a lot of time there looking at all of the displays and playing with anything Brittany wanted. And she'd never admit it to anyone but Brittany, but Santana had fun too. Who wouldn't? While Brittany was completely distracted by something else Santana managed to sneak off by saying she had to make a phone call. She quickly ran outside to nearby store and got her and Brittany some sandwiches, drinks, fruit to share and a few other things that she could fit in her purse and ran back to the toy store. She stopped at a display of the FAO Schwarz bears, knowing Brittany would love one, and bought one for her as well before returning to the floor that she'd left her on to find Brittany wandering up and down the isles. "Ready to go?" She asked from behind her making Brittany jump.

After she recovered she hugged Santana. "This has been the best day."

"It's not over yet. Come on." She took her hand and led her out of the store and down the street to Central Park. She hadn't originally planned to stop here because it's late November but the weather had been surprisingly pleasant, however the light wasn't going to stay with them for much longer. An accidental sunset viewing in Central Park with a picnic, pretty romantic for a spontaneous decision she thought as she pulled Brittany into the park.

"Where are we going? What's left on the list?"

"Chinatown, but first I wanted to add something." She slowed down as they came to a bench and turned to look at Brittany. "Central Park. I thought in the toy store that since it wasn't too cold we could have a picnic. But if you want something fancier I understand."

"No this is perfect! So perfect. Do we need to get food?"

"Already done babe." Santana started pulling bags out of her purse. "First off, I got you this." She handed Brittany the bear she had bought.

"Santana!" She reached out and gently took the bear. "Thank you!" She looked at him and stroked his soft fur before reaching out for Santana and bringing her in for a kiss. "How are you so perfect?"

"I blame you." She answered sweetly.

"Now when I have to spend nights without you I have a bear from you. It has brown eyes like you."

"Not too many nights though hopefully. Here's a sandwich and some chocolate milk and a massive cookie for you. And some for me. And I got a fruit cup for us to share." They laughed and ate and Brittany fed Santana fruit. She kept looking over at the pond and Santana finally saw what she was looking at. "We can go over there if you want." She gestured towards the large pond with a few ducks still swimming on the unfrozen surface.

"I didn't know they stayed here for the winter."

"I guess cause it has been so mild they just haven't left yet. They usually don't until the pond freezes over." She told her as they walked towards it. The closer they got the more excited Brittany became until they got to the pond and saw that they weren't supposed to feed the ducks according to the signs. "I'm sorry Britt. I didn't know we weren't allowed to feed them."

"It's ok they probably shouldn't eat cookie anyway." She looked slightly dejected. Santana was about to say fuck it, lets feed them cookie anyway when an older woman walked up to them.

"Here honey. Feed away. Just don't let the guards see you. I'm here everyday. I think they suspect something." She winked at Brittany before walking away.

"Go on B. Feed them. I'll keep watch." Santana laughed. What would they do anyway? Brittany happily fed the ducks that wandered over to her the ripped up pieces of bread. And as Santana suspected, fed them the cookie as well. It was almost dark by time they left and Santana could tell Brittany was starting to get tired, but Brittany insisted that she wanted to go to Chinatown before they left.

When they get there she thinks she'll have to bring Brittany back during the day when she's less tired because she looks a little overwhelmed by the experience. And it is crowded. They don't stay long, Brittany managed to eat more street food and then they headed back down to the warm subway. Santana decided that they should get off in Times Square and walk back to their hotel because she thinks Brittany will like it. And she's correct. She loves the flashing lights and manages to not get overwhelmed like she had in Chinatown. Santana thinks it's because all Brittany was doing was looking up in Times Square, she didn't even see all the people. Yeah, they'd be back. This place just fit Brittany somehow. Energized and happy.

They walked back to the hotel garage and picked up the keys and paid an insane amount of money before going to the car and getting in. "I think I ate too much."

"Yeah I think that's maybe true." She laughed as she pulled out of the garage. Driving in New York City is a skill. And Santana is pretty decent at it. It's not like this where she lives but she's come into the city enough to be good at it. But she can tell its scaring Brittany. "Lay back baby. Close your eyes. It's fine, we aren't going to wreck. I've done this a million times." Brittany nods and lays back. Santana holds her hand comfortingly and is thankful, not for the first time, that she's left-handed.

Brittany is uncharacteristically quiet during the drive. Not the kind of contented smiling quiet that she gets sometimes, but a kind of quiet that lets Santana know that she's thinking hard about something. "What's going on in that pretty head of yours?"

"I'm nervous to meet your parents." She says into the dark quiet after a few seconds.

"You don't need to be Britt-Britt. They'll love you. It's impossible not to."

"I just want them to think I'm good enough for you. What if they don't?"

"That's not even a thought worth having. You're more perfect for me than anyone in the world. They'll see that." She answers easily. And because she sounds so sure, Brittany trusts her. They pull into a driveway of a house that is larger than any around it. "Let's do this." Santana says as she gets out of the car. She grabs their bags and walks with Brittany to the door. The quiet, even more than the lack of cars in the driveway lets Santana know that her brothers aren't here yet. She sets their stuff down and takes Brittany's hand and leads her towards the kitchen where her mother most assuredly is. "Mami?" She asks as she walks into the kitchen.

"Mija!" Before Santana even sees her she's being hugged. "Let me look at you." Her mother steps back and Santana can feel Brittany shifting behind her. Santana tightens her hold on her hand. "You've lost weight. I can tell." She's twisting Santana's face back and forth by her chin. "You need to eat more. Are you going to introduce us?" She gestures to Brittany. Santana loves her mother, but she moves and talks so fast that it can sometimes be intimidating if you don't know her.

"Mami. Slow down." Santana pulls Brittany from behind her to her side. "This is my girlfriend Brittany. Brittany this is my mother." She says gently. Hoping her mother will pick up on the fact that Brittany is already overwhelmed. She doesn't. Her mother pulls Brittany into a hug, which only surprises Santana a little bit.

"Call me Maribel. Oh Santana she's so pretty." She hugs her again. "But too skinny. Are you feeding her?" She asks Santana before she looks over at Brittany. "Is she taking care of you?" Santana shakes her head back and forth laughing lightly. Brittany seems to be less nervous if the loosened hold on her hand is any indication. "What do you girls want to eat? I can heat something up or I can cook something. Anything."

"We can't eat mami. I swear we ate our way through New York City today." Brittany nodded in agreement.

"Tea then. Sit. Sit. I'll get it." Santana looked over at Brittany and mouthed 'she's always like this'. To her. Brittany smiled and mouthed 'I like her'. Santana was glad. If she had to pick a word for her family in general she'd pick overwhelming. They're loud, and all have big personalities and can make new people nervous. Or feel left out. But so far Brittany has liked both her mother and all of her brothers.

After tea is made Maribel launches into questions about their drive, and how the semester is going for them. "What are you majoring in Brittany?"

"Dance ma'am."

"Stop with this ma'am thing. It's Maribel, I told you. So you dance. I don't know a lot about dance. Do you have a preference of which kind of dance?"

"I love all kinds. I think my two favorites are hip-hop and modern. I love to swing dance but just for fun. Ballet is beautiful. I love all dance." Brittany answered still quiet. Still looking down slightly. Santana wished there was something she could say or do to make Brittany realize she doesn't need to be afraid of her mother. She was worried that the shyer Brittany got, the more her mother would push. That's the kind of thing she did.

Maribel however, was picking up on Brittany's demeanor. The poor girl, for whatever reason, didn't seem very comfortable right now. Which had been why she brought up a topic Brittany might be comfortable with. She desperately wanted to ask her any of the millions of questions floating around in her head but she thought maybe tonight, for Brittany's sake, she'd take it slow. It might also be for Santana's sake, who looked like she was about to pounce on anyone at the first sight of Brittany's comfort level dropping any lower. "Do you know how to waltz? And, what is it, ball room dance?"

"Mhmm." Brittany nodded picking at her fingernails.

"Maybe you could show me some time." Brittany looked up and made eye contact for the first time and smiled.

"I could do that. I think I'm a good teacher." Santana squeezed her other hand under the table, encouraged by Brittany's sudden enthusiasm. She wanted to hug her mom for playing this right.

"Have you ever taught before?"

"A little bit. I taught a class called dance movement, but it was for really little kids. Like three to five years old. I loved it." So she loves children? Maribel thought. Promising.

"That sounds pretty cute." Before they got any further into their conversation Santana heard footsteps and before she could turn around she felt a heavy hand on her shoulder.

"Papi" She looked up and smiled at him. He smiled down at her, glad she was home, before looking at their table guest.  
"And who is this Santana?" Brittany cowered slightly. She'd only heard one or two stories about Santana's dad that were not nice, but she had no idea how he was going to react to her.

"This is my girlfriend. Brittany. Brittany this is my dad."

"Hello Mr. Lopez." Brittany said quietly.

"Antonio, please. And it's very nice to meet you Brittany." He stuck out his hand and she took it, and he shook her hand very gently. She looked up at him and saw that his size, as well as his features made him look like an older version of Santana's brothers. Her hand dwarfed in his.

"It's nice to meet you as well." Brittany said, trying to force herself to remain looking in the vague direction of his eyes. Antonio met Maribel's gaze with questioning eyes. Was this girl really that shy? She shook her head slightly, they'd talk about it later. "Thank you both for having me here for Thanksgiving." Brittany said, looking at both of them in turn. She was nervous and anxious to have met them, but she was grateful. If they had said no, she'd be at home right now, far away from Santana, which is the exact opposite of where she wanted to be.

"It's our pleasure Brittany." Antonio replied, Maribel nodding enthusiastically. Santana wanted to yell Mami! You're trying to hard! At her but she didn't think anyone would appreciate that. "Well I need to get upstairs and send some emails. I want to hear about school sometime this week Mija." He said thumping Santana on the shoulder again before heading off.

"My husband is a man of few words. But it's true Brittany, we're glad you're here. I'm sure your parents must miss you though." Brittany's eyes fell and Santana glared harshly at her mother, about to open her mouth to say anything to help Brittany. But Brittany beat her to it.

"Somehow I think they're ok." She smiled sweetly at Maribel. Conversation switched after that to a discussion about something that had happened earlier this week at work that had Brittany and Santana both laughing into their tea. "Could I please use your restroom?"

"Absolutely sweetie. It's down the hall and on the right." Maribel pointed in the general direction. Brittany excused herself and headed in that direction. "She really is beautiful Mija."

"I know Mami." Santana responds. Looking in the direction Brittany had just walked off in.

"I can tell you love each other. The way she looks at you. And the way you look at her. I'm so happy for you Santana. I feel like she's settled you. You seem less on edge."

"Brittany brings out the good in anyone that lets her in." Santana says smiling at just the sound of her name coming out of her mouth. Maribel felt her heart swell at the happiness in her daughter's voice.

"I spent a lot of time worrying, and agonizing over whether or not we had made the right decisions for you as a child Santana. I spent so much time being afraid that you'd never feel ok in your skin, or that you'd never find real happiness. And not that I think you need another person in your life to be happy, because I've tried to raise my children to be independent. But watching you look at her, I know you're happy. I can feel it. And I am so very thankful Santana. For her and everything else that has made you into this person you are." Maribel hadn't meant to get very emotional. She had just meant to tell Santana that she was glad Santana had been happy. "I'm sorry I didn't mean to get so emotional." She said wiping tears from under her eyes.

"You don't have to take back those kinds of things." Santana smiled, knowing Brittany says the same thing to her. "I am happy. And you and papi have always done everything you could for me, I know that. I'm lucky to have Brittany but I'm lucky to have you guys too. Just so you know." And she meant it. She'd never felt particularly lucky. She was grateful that her parents had never made a bigger deal out of her anatomy. But after having met Brittany, and knowing how her parents treat her, she's never been surer that she was lucky to have them. She watched as her mother quickly wiped another tear away before taking her hand.

"Well, I love you. Never doubt it. Anyway. I think you might want to take your lovely girlfriend upstairs and get her to bed. She looked a little dead on her feet. Is she always so shy?"

"No. She is definitely tired. I think she's just really worried about you liking her." Santana wasn't sure it was ok to give away any information about Brittany and her relationship with her parents. She heard Brittany close the bathroom door on her way back to them before she had to make any real decision.

"I really like your soap. It smells awesome." Brittany smiled and Maribel laughed, thankful for anything that cut the tension.  
"I think I'm ready for bed babe. Are you?" Santana asked. Brittany nodded.

"I should be heading in that direction myself. Girls, have a good night. Sleep in as long as you want tomorrow. Then maybe we could watch some movies until your brothers get home." She pulled Santana into a hug kissing her cheek. "Goodnight Mija." She let Santana go and pulled Brittany into a hug kissing her cheek as well. "Goodnight sweetie. I'll see you both in the morning." With that she walked towards the staircase. Santana stepped forward and took Brittany gently into her arms.

"I love you. I love you for meeting my parents and liking my mother and my brothers. I just need you to know I love you." Brittany buried her face in Santana's neck holding tight, feeling comfortable again.

"I love you too. Thank you for bringing me, and wanting me here."

"Always B." Santana kissed her temple and then lead her to the front door to grab their stuff, and then up the stairs to her bedroom. It hadn't registered to Brittany yet that she was excited to see Santana's bedroom. She wondered if it looked a lot like her room at school. Santana pushed the door open and Brittany registered that it smelled different. But that was probably because this room didn't have Santana in it all of the time. So it didn't have her smell. Which Brittany loved. There was more pictures, more little things pinned to her walls. Some posters. Lots of pictures of her and her brothers, or her and Quinn. Her bed was bigger here, not that it mattered. Big beds were wasted on them because neither Brittany nor Santana could handle being in the same bed and not being wrapped around each other.

"I like your room."

"I like you being in my room."

"Goof. We should shower. Separately."

"If you insist. Why don't you go first babe. You look exhausted."

"Ok where do I go?" Santana laughed and pointed at a door behind her.

"You have your own bathroom? That's so cool."

"Technically I share with Gabe but he never uses it. Plus he's not here." Brittany nods before turning around to pull out pajamas.

"Towel?"

"There will be some in there in the linen closet." Brittany goes to walk away but Santana grabs her hand and swings Brittany back towards her and into her body. "Kiss first." She leans in kissing Brittany tenderly. And thinking, like every other time she kissed her, that time spent not kissing Brittany was really just a waste of time. She pulled away, pressed one more small kiss against her lips before smacking her butt. "Now you can go."

Brittany isn't sure how she managed to not fall asleep in the shower. But she left the bathroom to see Santana putting the last of her stuff in a drawer. "I unpacked us. I hope you don't mind, I just figured why live out of suitcases? We're going to be here for a week."  
"Thank you baby." Brittany said as she wrapped her arms around Santana from the back, resting her head on her shoulder.

"You smell good."

"I used your soaps. Go shower so we can cuddle." Santana turned around and kissed Brittany before grabbing her stuff she'd laid out and going into the bathroom. She was in the shower washing her hair as fast as she could so she could get back to Brittany when it occurred to her that she'd never had a chance to tell Brittany how wonderful she had done at the dance show. She felt like complete shit. She was the worst girlfriend in the history of girlfriends. She sped up her showering even more. She wiped furiously at her eyes as she rinsed the conditioner from her hair. She had been distracted. But that's not an excuse. Brittany had worked so fucking hard and the person who is supposed to love her most in this world hadn't even said good job. She washed her body as quick as she could. She towel dried her hair, brushed her teeth, and put clothes on, she knew she'd regret not blow drying her hair in the morning but she didn't care. She pulled her boxers on as she pushed the door back open into her bedroom.

"Brittany I-" Brittany was fast asleep curled up on top of her bed. She looked adorable but also like she might be freezing. She grabbed her phone and snapped a picture real quick deciding it's not creepy because they were together. She set her phone down on the bedside table and leaned over her bed kissing Brittany's forehead, down her nose, then to her lips, before Brittany stirred awake. "I'm sorry to wake you baby but it's cold and I want you to get under the covers."

"I didn't mean to fall asleep." Brittany mumbled as she clumsily got off of the bed with Santana's help. Santana pulled the covers back and ushered Brittany underneath them. She shut off the lights before climbing in herself. "That's why I didn't get under the covers. Warm and cozy would have put me to sleep."

"You could have gone to sleep baby. I mean you did anyway."

"I didn't want to. I wanted to talk to you."

"Before you say anything B I need to tell you that I am so unbelievably sorry that I didn't tell you how amazing you were at the dance concert last night. I feel like the worst girlfriend on earth. I thought what you did was breath taking and I am so mad that he had to ruin it. But for those minutes I was in it Britt. I couldn't see or think of anything but you."

"I know San. I could see you the whole time. I could tell you liked it. There was a lot going on. It's ok. I honestly hadn't even thought about it."

"I promise to make it up to you next time. Next dance concert in the spring, I will take you out afterwards and wax poetic for hours about every detail of your show. But next time, no surprises. I want to see it more than once. Ok?"

"Definitely." Santana could hear the smile in her voice even if she couldn't see her face. "So your mom is nice. Your dad seemed so too, he wasn't there very long. I'm sorry I was awkward. I'm really trying."

"Meeting your girlfriends parents is always awkward baby you're doing wonderful. And my mom really likes you."

"You think?" Her voice dripping with hope.

"Definitely. She's really obvious when she doesn't like someone."

"I hope she keeps liking me."

"Britt you are impossible not to like. When you went to the bathroom she told me that she had had a lot of guilt when I was growing up. About whether or not she'd made the right choices for me. And whether or not I'd ever find somebody to love and be happy with. She said seeing us together helped ease that. I'm glad. I hate that she's felt that way my whole life. She's been different since I went to college. Luis says it's empty nest stuff. Like she's coming to the realization that we're all out of the house now. I like it though. It feels like we're getting closer. I just don't think she knew how to deal with it. I mean we weren't going to have sex talks or talks about boys. But maybe it's just easier now that I've got most of that stuff all figured out. " Santana suddenly felt bad for talking about her relationship with her mother when Brittany's was such a mess.

"That's amazing Santana. That she's opening up and that she's been trying to get closer. That makes me happy, but it doesn't surprise me. You are pretty amazing." Brittany replied honestly. It encouraged Santana to go on.

"My dad is nice too. He's quiet. Kind of like Gabe and me sometimes. I just wish my anatomy were easier for him to deal with. When he said stuff about me getting surgery to make me completely female it confused me. I felt completely female. Surgery felt risky and unnecessary. Even though he hasn't brought it up in a really long time, I still can't help but feel that he's always wondering why I didn't just do it so I could be normal. We don't talk about it. Other than when he asks me if everything is ok medically. I usually just tell him that nothing has fallen off or anything if that's what he means." Brittany laughed.

"God I hope not." Santana laughed and kissed her clothed shoulder. Getting more agitated with the amount of clothing they were both wearing. She missed skin. "I'm excited to spend more time with them. I hope I can be less nervous." Brittany yawned.

"Go to sleep baby." Santana whispered into her ear. Brittany nodded before adjusting herself closer to Santana's body in her arms. Santana slipped a hand under Brittany's shirt trailing her fingers over her warm soft skin. Brittany hummed and nodded as if to say that yes, she wanted this. Santana smiled and started to sing lightly in Brittany's ear. Just a vague tune of a song she remembered in the moment, not realizing that she, herself was actually tired and fell asleep just after Brittany but before the song ended.

Brittany woke up first the next morning, as usual. And as usual she watched Santana sleep for as long as she could before she couldn't stop moving and got out of bed for fear of waking Santana. She quietly opened drawers trying to find where Santana had put her clothes. She smiled when she realized that Santana had unpacked them and put them in drawers together. All their underwear and socks up top, then shirts, then sweat pants and jeans, etc. She liked all their clothes mixed up. Not that it really mattered because they just shared anyway. Santana's mom had said movie day yesterday, so she assumed that meant casual. She pulled on a pair of knee high socks, and some sweat pants that she then pulled up to her knees. Noting that that didn't make a ton of sense but that she also didn't care. Then she pulled on a long sleeved shirt and one of Santana's hoodies that was basically hers now. She kissed Santana's forehead before heading downstairs.

Her confidence in her decision to go spend some time with Santana's family without her lessened the further down the stairs she got. A few steps from the bottom she had decided that maybe she should just go play a game on her phone or something when she heard Maribel from the kitchen.

"Brittany honey I know that's you. It's before noon so it's certainly not Santana. Come in the kitchen and help me will you?" Well there was no getting out of it now. She gulped, and reminded herself that this woman seemed to like her very much. And also, most importantly maybe, that Santana's parents were not her parents. She walked into the kitchen as casually as she could. "Tea? I already put some on so don't say no. I'm making breakfast. I hope you're hungry."

"Tea is great. You guys drink a lot of it here. Santana does at school too. I hadn't ever drank it before knowing her."

"Tea cures all kinds of things Brittany. Plus it warms you up. Your mother didn't make you tea when you were younger and sick?" Maribel knew she was treading over rocky territory bringing up Brittany's parents. She could tell from the reaction when they were brought up last night from both Santana and Brittany that there were issues there and she was curious. But Brittany just dropped her eyes and shook her head. She decided to drop it for now. "Would you like to help? You don't have to."

"I'd like to but I'm a really bad cook. I can only make like one thing."

"Well come here. We'll work on that. Grab a spoon and start stirring."

Santana woke up and tightened her arm around a pillow that was decidedly not Brittany. She cracked her eye open noting the lack of blonde hair and bright blue eyes that normally greeted her in he morning. Or woke her up in the morning. Brittany was not a late sleeper. They'd have to work on that. She looked towards the bathroom, she wasn't in there. Then she saw her sleep shorts and tank top folded on a chair and figured Brittany had gone downstairs. Where she inevitably would have encountered her mother. Oh shit.  
She got out of bed quickly and ran to her dressers to grab clothes. She happened to glance up in the mirror and literally scared herself her hair was that bad. "Oh hell no." She murmured remembering that she hadn't blow dried her hair and went to be with it wet. She jumped into the shower quickly rewetting her hair and then got out, brushed it and blow-dried it as fast as she could. It wasn't perfect but it wasn't scary anymore either. She put on the first thing she grabbed and ran downstairs.

She skidded into the kitchen doorway just in time to see Brittany successfully flipping a pancake under the watchful eye of her mother. Who had her hand on Brittany's back, and cheered when she got it back in the pan. Santana also noted what looked to be several pancake flipping fails in a pile in the trashcan. She couldn't help but watch the scene for a second. Loving that Brittany seemed as carefree as Brittany usually does, not tense or stressed. And also impressed that her mom had let Brittany help after she realized that Brittany didn't know what she was doing. She was normally really controlling in the kitchen.

"Good morning Mami. Morning Britt Britt" Both women turned around at the same time to look at her. Brittany giggled and her mother cocked an eyebrow at her. "What?"

"I Heart Unicorns. Really Santana?" Santana looked down at her shirt, noting it was one of Brittany's obviously.

"It's Brittany's!" She replied defensively. "Plus it's soft." She watched Maribel cock an eyebrow again. "Whatever. Making pancakes?"

"Yep your mom is teaching me." Brittany was bouncing on her feet. It relieved Santana. The anxiety from yesterday gone, her eyes bright and smiling again.

"I'll finish this you two set the table. It's just us."

"Where's papi?" Usually he was really good about not working on Sundays. He worked a lot but Santana did know that he really tried to make enough time for his family.

"He and some guys from work drove down to see the football game. They left early this morning. Something about a guy's day. So it's girl's day here. I was thinking breakfast, and then I need to run to the store. Your brothers are coming today so we need more food. You girls could come with me and we could get some movies and whatever snacks you like. Then we could watch movies in the game room until your brothers get home. Then maybe we could play a game or something? Unless you girls have other plans." She looked at Santana hopefully. Santana smiled. She was putting in way more effort than she usually did. And part of that was Santana's fault. Whenever she came home she'd just end up going to Quinn's house anyway. Even when her mom did suggest things they could do together.

"Nope. Plan was to hang out with you today. Can we get scary movies?"

"Is there any other kind Santana? I mean really." Her mother replied casually but neither Santana nor Brittany missed her widened smile.

"Maybe like one not scary movie? Or something. Please." Brittany squeaked. She'd never watched so many scary movies in her life as she did with Santana. She figured watching movies with her mom would mean chick flicks.

"Whatever you want babe. What's that one you said I had to watch. Something about dragons?"

"How To Train Your Dragon?!" Brittany replied excitedly. "Yeah! We should get that one too. You'll both love it."

"Definitely B." She said as she pulled out Brittany's chair for her. Kissing the top of her head before sitting next to her.

Maribel loved her children. And like most parents, saw mostly good in them. But she knew that Santana was about as spoiled as any child ever. She had had her older brothers wrapped around her little finger since birth pretty much. Even before everything had happened. And she and Antonio weren't much better. Giving her nearly anything she wanted because part of them would always feel guilty for the adversity that she had had to face. But here she was, accepting and even suggesting a movie that ordinarily she never would have watched or even wanted to just because she knew it would make Brittany happy. Her baby was both in love, and growing up.

When they got back from the store Santana and Maribel gathered blankets and pillows into the living room. "I'll take this couch, you two take the other." Maribel said throwing blankets onto the smaller couch. Santana sat down on one end expecting Brittany to cuddle up to her. Brittany, however, sat conservatively far away from her. They only part of them that was really touching was the hand that Brittany had grabbed as she sat down. At first Santana was going to say something to her but she knew what Brittany was doing. She was trying to play it safe in front of her mother, but Santana knew that would last about as long as it took the first movie they got to get scary.

She had been absolutely correct. By about fifteen minutes into the movie Brittany had jumped into her lap as something scared the characters on the screen. Santana laughed lightly as she rearranged herself so that Brittany could comfortably lie against her on her lap. Brittany took a quick glance at Maribel, satisfied that she was not only not watching, but didn't care, she settled back into Santana and sighed when she felt arms circle her waist under the blanket. "Love you." Santana whispered into her ear.

"Love you too." Brittany whispered back. Santana buried her nose into Brittany's hair, and her neck breathing her in and tightening her hold. She tried to focus on the movie but she had a beautiful girl in her lap who needed protecting. Brittany screamed every time something happened, and every time she thought something might happen. By the end of the movie Santana could feel Brittany's heart pounding in her chest.

"Your little heart. Pounding so hard." Santana murmured into her ear.

"Yeah that one was scary. Maybe How to Train Your Dragon now?"

"Yeah. Definitely. That's what I was going to suggest too. Mami I'm going to put in the dragon movie now." She said louder so her mother would know not to move onto another scary movie. After a trip to the kitchen and popping the other movie in she waited for Brittany to come back in. She was worried that Brittany was going to try and keep modest distance again. But when Brittany came back she set her drink down and pulled the blankets up and climbed on top of Santana, laying on her stomach with her head on Santana's chest in a position that was very familiar to them. This was how they normally watched movies. "I'm glad you realized my mom doesn't care."

"I just don't want to make her feel weird."

"Are you kidding? She looks like Christmas has come every time we hug. I think so long as we keep it PG she is more than ok with it."

As if to prove her point Maribel walked back in. "Don't make me do a hand check girls." Santana groaned embarrassed and Brittany just held both of her hands up where Maribel could see them and laughed at the embarrassment she could feel rolling off of Santana.  
Sometime in the middle of the second movie (of which Santana was totally engrossed in even though she'll never admit it) Maribel received a text that the boys would be coming in in a few hours. So as soon as it was over (after Santana had discretely whispered in Brittany's ear that she'd like to buy this movie) Maribel got up to make dinner. "Santana go into the garage and get some pasta sauce off the shelf."

Santana untangled herself from her very warm and cuddly girlfriend to do has her mother had asked. Brittany got up as well and was looking around the living room when she saw a table with baby pictures on it. She picked up a small silver frame that was etched with "Santino Lopez" on it. The name didn't match who she could tell was in this picture. Santana had been the tiniest little baby with giant brown eyes and beautiful little features and crazy almost black hair.

"I should have known from the moment she was born that she was a girl. Look at the boys when they were all born. I was not capable of having little boys. She was so tiny growing up. Just nowhere near what her brothers were. Antonio always had these strange suspicions. I just thought she had a hormone problem. But he was right." As she told the story she pointed out pictures of a little Santana but with short hair and wearing overalls or blue pajamas. One of her holding a doll but looking very unhappy about something. "You can see the difference in pictures after we started to let her live life as she is. Look how her smile reaches a little further."

And Brittany could tell. The little girl in the pictures with dresses and progressively longer hair did seem happier. "You have beautiful children."

"You're biased. You're in love with one of them." Maribel laughed. Clearly as uncomfortable with unplanned sincerity the same as Santana was. "But you're right. They are beautiful. And happy. Which is most important." She said stroking the side of a picture of all of them at a zoo. "Well I should get back…" And she trailed off as she headed to the kitchen to continue cooking.

Santana wasn't surprised when her brothers got home that they managed to increase the noise volume in the house by at least 100%. They were noisy. Always. Sometimes she'd try to pretend it was annoying but most days it was just comforting. They'd greeted her and Brittany in the same way before heading straight the kitchen to hug Maribel and get fed. Dinner was easy and light and everyone laughed. It was the best dinner Brittany thought she'd ever had. Dinner at her house was never like this. But it seemed like it was a regular thing here. She hoped she'd be around to experience a lot more of them.

After dinner they went to the game room and started playing video games. Santana and Brittany mostly just watched but a few times one of her brothers would try and make Brittany learn how to play. Watching all of the most important people in her life fit seamlessly together had served to make her heart feel full and happy. She also wanted to kiss Brittany a thousand times over for being as amazing as she is. She waited until she couldn't anymore before whispering to Brittany that she was ready to go to bed whenever she was. Brittany was tired, or at the very least, ready for some alone time with Santana, so she agreed and after saying their goodnights they headed to bed.

When they got into Santana's room she closed the door and leaned back against it. "I hope you didn't feel like you had to go to bed because I said I was ready. I mostly just meant that I wanted some alone time. I haven't been able to properly kiss you since last night."

"I was thinking the exact same thing." Brittany stepped back towards Santana who pulled her the rest of the way in and trapped her lips in a searing kiss. "Mmm. Let's put pj's on and get into bed."

Santana nods and pulls her pants off and takes off her other shirts and pulls on a tank top before climbing into the bed. Brittany climbs in and presses herself as close to Santana as she can. Santana brushed a hair out of Brittany's face before leaning in to kiss her. It was slow, deliberately so. Full of love. When they needed air they would just lie there with their foreheads pressed together. "I wish I could feel all your skin." Brittany pouted.

"Me too. I miss it."

"Do you think if I get up and lock both doors, and we don't do anything that would make them think we're having sex we could maybe just sleep like we normally do?" Brittany wasn't so confident Santana would be ok with that plan. But she couldn't help but hope. She was used to sleeping with almost all, or all, of Santana's skin pressed against hers. Warming her. Making her feel closer to her than anybody ever. She was spoiled by it and now it was hard to go back to all these barriers. She pulls at her flimsy tank top.  
"I think that would be ok." Santana responds hesitantly. Brittany jumps up and locks the doors, flinging her tank top to the ground in the process leaving her in just underwear. Santana slid hers off as well but couldn't stop staring at Brittany. Her pale skin nearly glowing in the moonlight, her perfect body. "I miss touching you. We can't. Not with everyone in the house. But I miss it."

Brittany settles back into Santana's arms, breasts pressing together, stomachs touching, hands on naked backs. "Feels good though. This." Santana nods adjusting herself to be able to run her fingers up and down Brittany's back. "I miss touching you too. And other things. It's like my vagina met your penis and now it is very reluctant to spend so much time apart." Santana giggled and pressed her face into Brittany's neck.

"My penis misses your vagina too B."

The next day they were awoken way too early (by Santana's definition). Brittany had already been awake and tracing shapes into Santana's back when she heard someone knocking, no, pounding on Santana's door. "GET UP! WE'RE GOING TO THE PARK COME ON!" Brittany recognized the voice of Diego.

"Get the fuck out of here it's the crack of fucking dawn!" Santana slurred.

"It's almost ten." Brittany whispered sweetly in her ear. "You could stay in bed. Can I go to the park with them though?" Brittany knew that Santana would in fact not stay in bed and would go to the park with them. But she liked to let Santana think she came to that decision on her own, and wasn't coerced by Brittany's sweet voice and little kisses.

"SATAN GET OUT OF BED AND COME ON!" Miguel had joined in on the yelling. "Why's your door locked huh? Layin down that Lopez charm?!" He rattled the door knob.

"Good think I locked it last night. Brittany said as she climbed out of bed to start getting dressed. She glanced at Santana who had a scowl firmly planted on her face and was blushing.

"Miguel shut up or I swear I will-"

"You must not be very good. We didn't hear a peep last night." Brittany was pretty positive that wasn't going to go over very- yep. Here comes the Spanish. Brittany couldn't understand what she was saying but she was pretty sure there were swear words and insults involved. She heard Diego and Miguel crack up before they yelled to be down in ten and she heard them thundering down the stairs.

"Calm down baby. They're just trying to get you worked up." She put her arms around a still deeply scowling Santana. She leaned in and whispered into her ear "Plus we both know that is absolutely not true. You're amazing." And she licked the shell of Santana's ear, effectively re-focusing her attention, and causing the scowl to disappear. Santana turned in her arms and kissed her deeply. They pulled apart and got dressed, Brittany talking about a dream she had, and headed down stairs.

The park had been great fun. They played football, which Brittany knew nothing of other than what she'd learned because she had been a cheerleader. There had been a big debate about the legality of a play when Diego just picked up a ball holding Brittany and ran her to their touch down zone. But mostly it was just a lot of mud and a lot of laughing. As they were walking home Luis brought up something that neither girl had thought about in a few days.

"So Britt, I don't want to bring up bad stuff but has that asshole called or bothered you since Friday night?"

"No." Brittany answered quietly. She felt Santana wrap an arm around her waist protectively pulling her closer to her own body.

"You don't need to tell me everything. Or anything really. But we just need to know enough to know how to protect you and Santana. I don't want him anywhere near either of you." Brittany nodded. She knew she owed them some kind of explanation after they had protected her without question.

"Do you want me to tell them babe?" Santana asked gently.

"No I can do it. He's just my ex boyfriend. I guess he still wants to be with me so he came up and was mad that I was with Santana." The explanation didn't exactly fit what they had seen that night.

"Has he hit you before?" Diego asked. Brittany looked down. Ashamed that she had let that happen in her life. Unsure of how to explain it to other people who surely just think she's stupid for putting herself in that situation in the first place.

"It's ok Britt. They're just trying to help." Brittany nodded. Santana answered for her. "Yeah he has. Among other things." Santana watched her brothers get visibly angry. But surprisingly enough it was Miguel that answered logically.

"Well we all witnessed him hitting you. Of course only Luis, Santana, and that other kid could confess to it because Gabe Diego and I kind of kicked the shit out of him which is less than credible as far as witnesses go I think. I don't know the laws in New Jersey like I know them here but I'm pretty sure you're allegeable, between your past and what we saw for a restraining order. He wouldn't be allowed to come anywhere near you guys."

"He wouldn't be allowed anywhere near Brittany. Santana has no grounds for one. But I highly doubt he's going to be coming after either of them. Just in case though, I think it's a good idea. I have a friend on the force there so I can give him a call and see if we could get the ball rolling on that. If you were interested." Diego finished up.

Brittany looked at them both confused. "They're cops baby." The information surprised her. She didn't know what she thought they did. Professional big brothers? She guessed that maybe that could be a cop. "That doesn't sound like a bad idea."

"What would I have to do?" Brittany liked the idea that Tommy wouldn't be allowed near her. "And what does a restraining order mean?"

"You'd have to file it. And then go to court, he would have to as well, and then you'd tell your story. There are witnesses if needed, he could counter the story. Your past would be brought up. And then the judge would issue the restraining order. Then if he comes within the ordered distance from you, you call the cops, he goes to jail." Santana could tell that Brittany didn't like the idea by the way her body tensed against her and the hold on her hand tightened.

"I don't want to do that. I don't want to have to explain to strangers what happened. I don't like talking in front of people and I'll mess it up and I don't want to have to see him again and my parents will be mad at-" Santana pulled her into a hug.

"Shhhh baby it's fine. You don't have to do anything you don't want to do. He's not going to come back anyway. He's afraid of my brothers." She held Brittany tight and signaled to her brothers that the topic was over. Miguel's blood boiled. What had this asshole done to her?

"Yeah Britt. Nothing you don't want to." He said. Trying to keep the anger out of his voice.

"You do have to call us though. I want you to put all of our numbers in your phone." Luis spoke, anger even less contained than Miguel's. Brittany turned around to face him. "You get any idea that he's about to show up, is on his way, or hell if he even just contacts you, you call us right away. I mean it Brittany. He will not hurt you, or Santana again. I won't let it happen. But you have to promise to call. Ok? Promise me."

"I promise." She said meekly. Thankful, but still worked up and embarrassed. Luis pulled her in for a hug, noting that Santana hadn't let go of Brittany's hand yet so he pulled her in for a hug too.

The mood lightened considerably after that as they talked about the boy's favorite topics, food and video games. They got home and put all of their muddy clothes in the wash and changed back into pajamas essentially. They met in the game room and put in another one of the scary movies that they had rented yesterday. Santana could tell that Brittany was feeling a little needy because she barely watched the movie. She spent most of it wrapped around Santana with her face buried in her neck. While unhappy for the cause of the need for closeness, Santana had no complaints about the closeness itself. She held tightly and kissed gently every time her brothers were distracted.

The mood transformed as Brittany, true to form, bounced back quickly. It became more playful when Brittany started tickling Santana during a particularly scary part of the movie to distract herself. That earned them a smack to the heads with a pillow and a gruff shut up from her giant brother who was snuggled under a blanket with sheep on it. She laughed at him which earned her another smack.  
After the movie they played a few rounds of a card game called spoons which mostly just involved Santana yelling at the boys for being too rough when what she really meant was you're being too rough with Brittany. But after Brittany assured them it was fine and all part of the game Santana backed off. A little. But she still glared. A lot.

After the game was over and her brothers were distracted by Mass Call of Duty in Skyrim or whatever they were playing Santana backed Brittany against a wall. She hadn't intended for that to go any further, but once she had her there she couldn't help but kiss her.

"Gross! Stop!" She heard yelled behind her. She reluctantly pulled away but not before placing one more small sweet kiss the corner of Brittany's smiling mouth.

They sat on the couch to watch them defeat dragons or zombies or Nazis whatever they were but were infinitely distracted by each other. Small kisses were stolen and silly sweet things whispered into ears until they were hit with another pillow.

"Seriously. You guys are gross. Get a fricking room."

"We would but all you assholes would still be here."

"Santana I would much rather go through life pretending you are an asexual being. While I know that's not true. Please stop referencing your sex life with your very innocent seeming girlfriend who is like another sister to me already. It makes me want to puke. Nasty." Brittany laughed and was simultaneously touched by Gabe's sentiment. He was a man of few words but when he said them, they were usually pretty awesome. They tried to keep their touches and looks to a minimum after that but apparently failed judging by the amount of pillows they'd been hit with.

By time Maribel had gotten home Santana was so close to just pulling Brittany into her room and locking them in there to avoid pillows and do, you know, other stuff. Maybe. She wanted to. So bad. But she knew her brothers would make a huge deal out of it if they honestly suspected anything at all. And she didn't want to deal with that. She didn't want to make Brittany deal with that. But her mom coming home kind of put all sexy time thoughts on the back burner because well, it's weird to think about sexing your girlfriend while your mom is telling you about her secretary. Brittany was being taught some random card game by her brother and Santana was helping in the kitchen with dinner. And by helping, her mom kept giving her tasks and then doing them anyway so mostly she just sat at the table and watched. Typical.

They all sat down to dinner a few minutes after Maribel had received a call from Antonio about being late. "So. Brittany. Do you have any siblings?" Well that was random Santana thought. Brittany swallowed and nodded.

"A sister. Jennifer. She's four years older than me."

"It's probably a bit louder here." Brittany nodded. That it was. But she liked it.

"Have you always danced?"

"Yep. Started when I was four. I was a cheerleader in high school too. But mostly just because my sister kind of made me. She was a senior when I was a freshman. But it wasn't always bad. There was some dancing. And, you know, people mostly left me alone."  
"That's cute you were both cheerleaders." Brittany laughed at Santana's noise of complaint.

"So what do you and your family do for Thanksgiving?" Santana was about to jump in when Brittany started to answer.

"Nothing really. My dad orders this like, whole pre made Thanksgiving thing through the store. You pick it up, and heat it up and it's ready to go." Maribel looked completely taken aback at the idea that someone wouldn't cook Thanksgiving dinner. Santana just knew it was one more thing about Brittany's childhood that made her want to make sure she never wanted for anything, but especially love and closeness. Family stuff. "So we ate dinner. Sometimes together even. But that's pretty much it."

"Well. I'm sure that's fun. I cook Thanksgiving dinner." Maribel tried to keep the superiority out of her voice. She failed a little. But it mostly just made Brittany laugh. "And there's football watching. And several rounds of eating. All together. Nobody leaves the house except for grocery runs and only when necessary."

"Sounds awesome." Brittany smiled. Santana was glad that she seemed to be doing fine in the conversation. Hoping her mother would stop with the grand inquisition though.

"Are your parents going to miss you this Thanksgiving?"

"No. I guess they're going to visit friends."

"Oh. What's your sister doing?"

"Going with them."

"Not that I'm not glad you're here with us but why aren't you going with them?" Santana threw Maribel a look that clearly said get the fuck away from this topic before answering because Brittany just looked like she didn't have any idea how to answer that.

"Because she wanted to be here Mami." Maribel got it. She'd move away from the family topic. For now.

"Well we're thankful." Conversation lulled for a few minutes while everyone ate silently. "So do you want children?" The water that Santana had been drinking was now currently traveling into her lungs as she coughed. Brittany patted her back.

"MOM!" Santana whined loudly once she could breathe again.

"What?! It's just a question." There was a pause and Santana thought it had been dropped. Before "Well..do you?" Santana started choking on her food while her brothers could no longer contain their laughter. Brittany patted Santana's back again and as soon as it was quiet enough she answered.

"Yes. Very much. But not right now." If for no other reason than to save her girlfriend from choking yet again. Maribel's eyebrow raised, impressed with her answer, and shot a very obvious look at Santana. The look on Santana's face caused the boys to fall into fits of laughter again. Antonio walked in only a few seconds after that and sat at his place at the table, piling enough food on his plate to rival the other four boys.

"What did I miss."

"Mami is pushing Brittany for grandbabies already." Another choking fit from Santana.

"Well. Good. We aren't getting any younger and you four don't seem to be in any hurry. Brittany please pass the salt." Santana's glare fell from her face at her father's response. That was the most obvious approval he had ever given of any of their significant others that had been brought home. That was also a blatant reference to the fact that she was capable of getting someone (specifically Brittany) pregnant, and that that was a positive thing. She couldn't help but smile a little at Brittany who was smiling at her after casually passing the salt.

"What do your parents do Brittany?" What the fuck? Santana thought. Are her parents in on this conspiracy to not only bring up topics that were going to kill her from choking but also make Brittany as uncomfortable as possible? But Brittany handled it with grace. Somewhere in the back of her mind it registered that these were things she'd never bothered to ask. Not because she wasn't curious, but because she didn't want to bring up anything that might make Brittany uncomfortable. But maybe Brittany was stronger than that.

"My mom doesn't do anything. She's the head of the women's group at her church. So I guess that's something. But not really. My dad is a plastic surgeon."

"Oh? What's his specialty?"

"Faces mostly. All kinds of things to do with faces." Santana noted the shift in Brittany's eyes. Imperceptible to anyone but her, but she knew it was something she'd bring up. Maybe later. "I know you're a surgeon. What is your specialty?" Antonio looked very pleased at being asked. Santana smiled, Brittany already knew that answer.

"Hearts. I'm a heart surgeon." Antonio smiled gently. Santana knew then (and probably already but she'd just been reminded) never to underestimate Brittany's power to charm anyone. Because she had clearly worked her magic over the brief conversations with her father, and whatever her mother had told him about her. Brittany just smiled back. And Santana knew, because they'd already discussed it, that she was thinking about just how awesome it was that he fixed hearts. But Brittany was thinking about how fixing hearts must be genetic because Santana fixed hers. "How do you feel about football Brittany? Answer carefully, this is very important." He joked with her.

"Oh well I haven't watched much football since high school but I am enthusiastic about the opportunity." That smile could bring world peace Santana thought as she accidentally put her hand in her own food trying to stop herself from reaching out to grab Brittany just to be closer to her. Antonio and Maribel chuckled at both Brittany's response and Santana's response to Brittany.

Dinner was followed by much of the same that they'd been doing before dinner. Video games, card games, movies. But Santana was finding it painful to not be touching Brittany. Dinner, and everything this vacation so far had gone so perfectly. Brittany fit in seamlessly with her family and it made Santana happier than she thought it would. She thought she wouldn't care either way. And while, in some alternate universe, if her family had not liked Brittany it wouldn't have changed her feelings at all, she was slightly surprised by how much it meant to her that they liked her very much. They were on the couch wrapped up in each other, mostly unaware of everything going on around them.

"I can't deal with them anymore. They are gazing into each other's eyes. Literally gazing. It's disgusting." Diego said, with no attempt to keep his voice down.

"It's kind of cute."

"I'm telling every guy at the station that you just said it was cute. Man card revoked."

"Whatever dick bag. I'm just happy for her. Look how happy she is."

"Yeah yeah. I'm happy for her too."

"We should maybe go see a movie tomorrow night. I heard Mami saying something about how they have a work party to go to." Gabe cut in.

"There's not anything good out right now."

"Not the point. Maybe if we leave them alone for a few hours they'll get…whatever out of their systems and then they'll be less obvious."

"Plus I can't be around them anymore. I'm going to dump a bucket of ice water on them." Diego responded. Luis walked in the room and kicked the couch Brittany and Santana were laying on. Effectively distracting them for a moment.

"Let's go to bed B." Brittany nodded.

"Keep it in your pants Santana the walls are thin." Luis replied as they walked out of the room.

"Yeah. We need to leave them alone for a few hours tomorrow. For sure."

Up in Santana's room they decided that clothes were necessary tonight because Santana was pretty positive she wouldn't be able to stop herself if she had a topless and wanting Brittany in her bed. Brittany totally agreed. After lying down and getting comfortable Santana realized she wasn't tired.

"Are you tired B?"

"Not really. Just a little. Why what's up?"

"I just was wondering why you looked sad when you said your dad was a face surgeon."

"It's nothing. He just brings up sometimes that he could fix my nose."

"I love your nose." Santana responded without even thinking about it. She leaned up so Brittany was lying on her back and Santana was propped up above her. She leaned down and kissed the tip of Brittany's nose.

"I don't mind it. I guess my mom used to have one just like it. But I just never thought it was a bad nose until he said something. I don't like that he looks at people's faces and thinks about what he could fix. I wish he helped people like your dad."

"Who loves you by the way. I've never seen him act like that with someone he doesn't know very well. Told you it's impossible not to love you." Brittany smiled and Santana couldn't stop herself from kissing her lips. "Can I ask you something else?"

"Anything." Brittany could hear the serious tone in her voice and wondered what brought that on.

"You said you wanted to have kids today. Did you mean…like, I know it's a long way off and there are a lot of circumstances involved but do you mean maybe me?"

Brittany gently forced Santana's eyes to meet her own. "Of course I meant you Santana. Who else would I possibly want that with? I want a family with you. And little babies that look like you. If you want babies that is. Do you?"

"More than anything. I've always wanted kids and I've always been so afraid nobody would ever want to have them with me." Brittany raised herself up to gently kiss Santana's lips. "I'm worried, and nobody can ever say one way or the other for sure, but I'm worried that what's wrong with me could be genetic."

"Nothing is wrong with you Santana. Nothing at all. You're perfect. Or as close as someone can get to it. If we had babies and we had a little girl who had a penis or a little boy that had a vagina even, would you love them any less? Do your parents love you any less?"

"I wouldn't love them any less. And no, my parents love me."

"I wouldn't love them any less either. It wouldn't matter to me at all. We'd just pay attention to who they say they are, just like your parents did. And we'd help them and love them and do everything we can for them. Ok? You don't need to think negatively about passing on any of your perfect genes ok?"

"You're biased. You just think that because you love me." Santana responded bashfully.

"And I'll love them. So they'll be perfect too."

"I want them to look like you too though. So not just babies that look like me."

"We'll see what we can do." Santana settled back down onto Brittany's chest and Brittany wrapped her arms around her before asking "How many?"

"I guess because I have a big family I always just assumed four or five. But I think we won't know till the time is right. You know?" She couldn't contain the amount of emotions she was experiencing right now. Lying in Brittany's arms while they talked so confidently about the future. Like it wasn't just her that wanted to love Brittany forever. Brittany wanted forever too.

"I want at least three I think." They spent the rest of the night talking about private vs. public school, names, and haircuts that are adorable on babies.

The next day was a series of make out sessions, and trying (and failing) not to get caught. They couldn't keep their hands off of each other. They hadn't even come out of Santana's room until noon because of a particularly intense make out session that resulted in a painfully cold shower for Santana. When Maribel got home that evening Brittany and Santana found out they had a work party that night and that they'd leave money to order something ("please not pizza you eat enough of that crap as it is!") and left. Santana, who was sick of being teased all day by her brothers about Brittany, suggested a movie in her room. Brittany agreed if only to save Santana any more embarrassment and they went upstairs. Santana unpacked her laptop for the first time so they could watch a movie. "Oh I left my drink downstairs. Be right back."

Brittany ran downstairs to get her drink and encountered Santana's brothers putting their coats on. "We're going out to dinner and to see a movie so that should give you guys a few hours alone for…you know. Whatever. Just try and be less all over each other by time we get back. Get it out of your systems." Brittany looked Miguel with a confused expression on her face.  
"You have the house to yourselves for hours." Brittany still wasn't picking up when he was trying to say. "Why is Santana so mad at us? What have we been teasing her about?"

"Se-..oh. Yeah. Ok. Well….see you guys later then." And with that she ran upstairs, no drink in hand. When she walked quickly towards Santana's room just before she went in she heard the door downstairs open and shut. She walked into the room and she shut it and locked it behind her.

"Babe you didn't bring up your drink."

"Don't need it." She was looking at Santana with a look that can only be described as hungry. Brittany takes a few short steps toward Santana and throws her arms around her neck before attacking her lips with her own. Santana moans into the kiss forgetting for a few minutes that her brothers were still in the house. Before she even has a chance to voice those concerns, Brittany is pulling her shirt over her head and throwing her bra off. Santana can't focus when Brittany is standing in front of her, half naked, giving her that look. Brittany gets it, so she helps her. She pulls Santana's shirt over her head brushing her hand over the slight bulge in her sweat pants. She undoes the clasps on Santana's bra too before throwing in to the side and leaning down to take an already stiff nipple between her lips, sucking and tugging lightly with her teeth.

It's all Santana can do to keep standing with Brittany lavishing her body with her tongue, teeth, and nails. Brittany drops to her knees in front of Santana and grabs the waistband of her sweatpants and pulls them down, bringing her boxers with it. Before even allowing Santana to step out of the pants she's taking the head of her dick into her mouth. "Fuck" Santana mumbles through gritted teeth as Brittany takes more of her into her mouth.

Brittany wants to suck Santana off. She wants her to cum in her mouth. But she has other plans. Because more than that she desperately wants Santana inside of her. Her body burns with the need, has been since she realized why Santana's brothers were leaving. Santana is completely hard and dripping precum when she lets out a moan that reminds her why they can't do this. "Britt.." she hisses "Britt my brothers."

"Gone. Went to dinner and a movie." She says before she flicks her tongue across another bead of precum.

"We're alone?"

"Mhmm." Brittany stands up and pushes her own shorts and underwear down. She's never felt like she's needed something so bad as she needs Santana inside of her. She can feel how ready she is as she pushes Santana back onto a chair and straddles her. Santana doesn't even have enough time to process what's happening before Brittany reaches down and gently grabs Santana's dick, positions it at her opening, and impales herself on it. "Oh. So full" She moans as she takes only a half second to adjust to being filled. Santana grips her hips tightly, needing her hands to go somewhere, do something.

Brittany starts to move up and down at a fast pace and Santana thinks she may have died and gone to heaven. Brittany is riding her like she needs her dick to survive, her head thrown back, breasts bouncing with the force of their combined thrusting. Santana leans forward, kissing any available skin before grabbing both breasts and brushing over her nipples with her thumbs.

It's never felt like this before. Santana keeps hitting this spot inside of her when she thrusts at that angle that makes Brittany see white spots. She uses her strong thighs to keep riding Santana, and there's so much pressure building that she almost stops because it feels so different than usual.

Brittany starts making louder noises. Moans and grunts and her name falls from her parted panting lips. Santana doesn't think she's going to be able to hold on much longer. She starts running her hand up Brittany's thigh towards her center to rub her clit when Brittany screams and Santana feels a gush of liquid come out of Brittany as her muscles clench around Santana and she lets out a scream that sounds a little surprised. She can't hold on any longer as she thrusts herself as deep as she can, holding Brittany's now limp body to her chest as she cums deep inside of her.

Brittany doesn't move right away as Santana's arched back eases back onto the chair. But then she starts to stir and looks at Santana with a look of confusion. She's a little bit embarrassed and has no idea what just happened. She had thought she was still a few minutes away from orgasm but then she felt like her body just exploded. "I don't know- that's never happened? Did I ju-"  
"You squirted. It's totally normal. I've seen it in a porn." Brittany raises a tired eyebrow at Santana. "Like female ejaculation. I think it happens when you have a G spot orgasm."

"I thought those were a myth." Santana feels a little proud because, yeah, she had thought they were a myth too. Or a trick that porn stars could do. But she'd just given a G-spot orgasm to Brittany, she was pretty positive anyway. "Obviously they aren't a myth though." Brittany continued. "I can't feel my legs. Can I just lay here for a minute?" Brittany collapses back into Santana's chest.  
"Here let me make you more comfortable." She was about to slide out of Brittany so she could rearrange them a little.

"No. Not yet. I feel like I need you in me for a little bit longer. Is that ok?" Brittany mumbled into her neck. Santana could still feel the tremors going through Brittany's body.

"Yeah baby, it's fine." She just ran her fingers up and down Brittany's spine, allowing her to recover. Eventually though, both of their legs started to go numb so Brittany decided it might be time to get up.

"Can we shower?" Santana nodded as she helped Brittany stand up. A shiver ran through her as she slid out of Brittany's hot center into the cool air. They were both covered in sweat and cum and a shower was definitely a good idea.

Santana stood up herself and lead Brittany to the bathroom. Never releasing her hand as she started the shower and made sure it was the perfect temperature. Brittany could feel she was already a little sore as she climbed into the shower, using Santana's hand to steady her.

After hair and bodies are washed they were holding each other kissing sweetly and Brittany could feel Santana was hard again. She'd never actually gone completely soft since Brittany had kept her inside of her for so long after. "I want to go again, but I think I'm too sore to take you inside. Would it be ok if we just touched each other?" Santana nodded as Brittany's hand circled her and gently pumped up and down a few times. "Be gentle with me please." Brittany whispered into Santana's ear as she rested her head on her shoulder.

Santana, as gently as she'd ever done anything, parted Brittany's folds and gathered some of the wetness that had pooled at her center and began to make slow gentle circles around her clit. Brittany wasn't sure if it as the force of her orgasm earlier but her clit felt overly sensitive, but coupled with Santana's gentle touches, felt amazing right now.

The build up was slow and gentle and took so long they nearly ran out of hot water but just as gentle as Santana had touched her, Santana had pushed her over the edge, and gently guided her back down again, never missing a beat as her own orgasm hit and Brittany felt hot cum spill over her hand. Brittany felt like she could barely move as Santana guided them through rinsing off and shutting off the water. She helped her out of the tub and even helped her into a pair of underwear before she collapsed onto bed. Santana crawled in behind her, pulling Brittany's body until they were pressed as tight together as they could be.

"I love you." Brittany spoke quietly into her ear.

"I love you too."

"What are you thinking about?" Brittany could practically hear Santana's brain working.

"Making love and the difference between having sex and making love. If there is a difference. Do you think there is?"

"I don't know. I guess not. I love you every time we have sex so that never changes. It's always making love then. But maybe there are different kinds of making love. Because sometimes it's super sweet and gentle. Sometimes it's quick and rough. Sometimes it might be experimental. You know?"

"Yeah. What kind is your favorite?"

"Any kind of sex with you is amazing. And I like the variety, so don't let my answer influence that. We should always try new things. But sweet and gentle is my favorite I think. You?"

"Me too. It's hot when you push me down and climb on top, and I loved it. But I love holding you and looking into your eyes. It makes me feel more connected."

"It makes me feel loved and protected and important."

"You are all of those things Brittany. And I'm glad I can make you feel that way." Santana brings Brittany's hand to her lip and kisses her fingers. "I always wonder what orgasms feel like for you. Like if I had a vagina. You know? Like does it feel the same?"

"Well. I think I have three different kinds of orgasms. So far anyway. So they kind of feel different depending."

"Really? Why are they different?"

"Well sometimes they build up slowly, and then there's this surge at the end, and it feels kind of like the pressure popped. Then there is the kind like earlier tonight and that one feels like tons of pressure, and then an explosion. It almost hurts, but in a good way. And the third one is kind of like really gentle waves, and then a slightly bigger wave and I feel like my body is rolling over it. That's like in the shower."

"I think maybe that's how mine are too. Do you have a preference?"

"Nope. As long as you're there holding me after, all of them are amazing. We still have a few more hours till your brothers get home but I think my lady parts might be done for tonight. Is that ok?"

"Do you have to ask? Of course. Movie?"

"Yeah! Which one?"

"I was thinking maybe this movie I grabbed when we rented the others. I don't if you've heard of it…Ice Age?" Santana jokes. Brittany claps excitedly.

"I love that series!"

"I know that's why I got this. I've never seen them. You love them. I thought we could watch it. Plus you probably need another break from all of the scary movies."

"Yeah. Definitely." Santana grabbed her laptop and set it up on the other side of Brittany so that she could still hold her and watch the movie at the same time. She learned that one of her favorite feelings was feeling Brittany giggle against her naked chest. The vibrations coupled with the sound were amazing. And she also maybe learned that she might like Ice Age as well. Whatever.

The Wednesday before Thanksgiving was always a little bit scary in the Lopez house hold. Honestly the day before any big eating holiday was scary. It was important to remain out of the way but available to help at any time. This was how Santana and Brittany found themselves on the third, yes third, trip to the grocery store. But it was also expected that you not complain and just do what Mami asks. So they did. Plus leaving the house meant a little quiet away from the teasing of her brothers. No less than yesterday, but for whatever reason she was calmer today. Okay she knew the reason but either way, getting away from it wasn't so bad. On her way to and from each trip she'd drive past somewhere else that she'd liked growing up including the school, and a coffee shop her and Quinn used to hang out in all the time.

The day passed quickly though, and soon enough they were collapsed in bed exhausted from having been woken up early, and running all day. They fell asleep quickly knowing that it would be another early day tomorrow.

The next morning they woke up to Antonio knocking on the door telling them to get up because he wanted to start putting lights up for Christmas. Santana rolled her eyes as she explained that this wasn't a tradition they did every year. Just randomly when they were in the mood. She thought Brittany would be annoyed but Brittany was throwing clothes on so fast Santana could hardly keep up.

"We don't decorate for Christmas! Someone comes to the house and does it from our homeowners association. So all the houses look the same. San this is going to be awesome!" Well, how could you argue with that enthusiasm? By time Santana got downstairs Brittany, Luis, and Antonio were already outside. Brittany was precariously putting a ladder up while her father and brother untangled a string of lights. And by a string, it was really more like a giant ball of individual strings of lights. But her papi looked determined so she stepped outside to help. Brittany's excitement was contagious and Antonio stated several times that next year he and Brittany were going to team up and do the ultimate in Christmas decorations. He was going to start planning in advance. Santana loved that other people besides just she and Brittany knew that they would still be she and Brittany next year.

By time they came in they were all shivering and Brittany's lips were blue and her face was all red. This was Santana's primary motivator for coming inside, Brittany looking so cold. They ate their first round of food and Brittany was positive she'd never eaten so many good things in her life. She was so full by the time she stopped eating that she jokingly told Santana to carry her into the living room. Before she knew it, she was swept up way too quickly for it to be Santana, and deposited on the couch by a laughing Diego. Santana laughed and joined her on the couch, cautious to not put any pressure on either of their stomachs. Antonio turned on the football game while Luis and Gabe cleared the table. The rest of the day was a repeat cycle of this same thing, resulting in both Santana and Brittany passing out on the couch cuddled close together. She woke up in the middle of the night and thought about waking Brittany up to walk upstairs but she was so warm and comfortable under the blanket that someone had covered them with that she just fell right back to sleep.

She woke up the next morning on the couch alone and got up to find Brittany was already outside with Antonio bundled up in one of her coats and what looked like her mothers scarf (Santana can guess who was responsible for that) working on round two of Christmas decorations. Santana went upstairs and showered and what not before coming back downstairs and sitting on the couch next to Gabe who wrapped an arm around her shoulder and pulled her into him as they watched some show about a pawn shop.  
Brittany, Antonio, Luis, and Miguel came in not long after. Brittany kissed Santana's head and ran upstairs to shower so she could warm up. Santana loved how happy she looked. "Santana can I talk to you for a minute upstairs?" Antonio yelled down from the office. Santana pulled herself away from a now snoring Gabe and went into the office.

"What's up Papi?" She said as she sat down on the couch he had had in there since she could remember.

"Well your mother and I were talking the other night and there's-" he hesitated for a second. She just waited for him to continue. "Parents make mistakes, you know that. And we do things we regret. Ok?" Santana nodded slowly. Still not sure where this was going. "I just want you to know that I love you. I know you know that." She nodded again, she did know that. She hadn't, save for once or twice in early teenage angst, ever questioned that. "But I've said some things to you that I regret. And I've treated you in a way that I regret. I just didn't ever know how to bring it up. But I didn't think it would be appropriate for me to tell you how happy I am that you've found someone like Brittany, before first telling you how sorry I am that I may have ever made you feel that you weren't absolutely fine the way you were." Santana tried to hold back tears.

"I know now, and have for some time, that you aren't weird or not normal. You are just you Santana, and I am so proud of you, and that I had some part in making you. You are talented and smart and caring. Your anatomy doesn't matter. It never has. And I think my problems with accepting you had more to do with guilt that I had somehow made this happen, or it was somehow directly related to my genetics and that you would suffer all of your life for it. I wanted you to have surgery because I wanted you to live a normal life. But you do live a normal life. And I just want you to know that you are normal. And if you hold any reservations about feeling that way, let them go." Santana couldn't stop the tears any more than she could stop herself from getting up and hugging her father. He hugged her patted her back awkwardly the same as he'd done every time she'd cried to him in the past over anything. He had always been this man. And the small bit of resentment she held for him had gone with his apology.

"Thank you Papi. I love you too." She pulled away from him and wiped the tears from under her eyes. "And thank you for including Brittany in things, it means a lot to her."

"I can tell. But she's a hard one not to like isn't she?" He smiled at her and Santana nodded. She left the office after her father clapped her on the shoulder once more and made her way to her bedroom. It wasn't that she thought Brittany had brought about this great change in her family. But she brought about a change in her that had allowed her family to see that they had done everything as right as they could. And that everything was so much better than even just good. Things were kind of wonderful right now. She got back to her room and walked in on Brittany putting her Lopez hoodie on and pulled her into a tight hug.

"Lay with me for a bit." Santana said as she pulled Brittany down on the bed without answer. She told Brittany about the conversation with her father, and about how she thought that the things with her mother and father were happening because they saw how happy she was. And they were happy that she was happy, and it made them feel good about the choices they'd made. Brittany just listened and ran her fingers through Santana's soft hair. An hour later after Santana had talked herself out and Brittany had accidentally soothed her to sleep they both reappeared downstairs and joined the family who were enthusiastically playing along with family feud.

Sunday came too quickly and Brittany wasn't excited to leave the Lopez house. She wasn't excited for classes or exams that were looming over her head. Pretty much the only thing she was excited about was seeing her friends, and alone time with Santana. After Maribel made her promise to let them know the next time she had a performance so they could all come and watch, they both hugged and handed huge containers full of food (with an extra for Quinn) and they were sent on their way. They stopped to pick up Quinn who had apparently had a very dull Thanksgiving but was eager to hear all about theirs.

When they were about half way back Brittany verbalized her desire to not return to school yet. "It's cool though Britt because we'll be done in a month and going right back." Quinn tells her. Brittany's face fell. She wouldn't be going back though, would she? She would probably have to go home to her family. She would probably have to spend an entire month there, not only with her family, but also far away from Santana. The idea alone turned her silent. She wasn't sure how she managed eighteen years there but the idea of a month sounded like hell.

Santana notices the sudden drop in Brittany's mood and is willing to bet it's directly related to the comment that Quinn had made. How soon was it to ask her to spend Christmas with her family as well? Surely her mom would approve. Maybe. She definitely would if Santana explained her home situation to her. But that wasn't really her place. She'd talk to Brittany about it and they would figure it out. They had time.

* * *

Did you like it? Comments? Concerns? Predictions?


	15. Chapter 15

**AN: **Thank you to my amazing beta.

Let me know what you think.

* * *

They aren't far from school when she gets a text from Rachel asking when she will be back to the dorm, she needs to talk to her about something apparently. She tells Santana this and watches as her shoulders deflate.

"I'm sorry baby. I want to stay over but I should go back to my room. She needs to talk and on top of that I need to unpack."

"I know B. I just don't really like sleeping without you."

"Me neither. But sleeping by ourselves makes sleeping together better." Brittany doesn't really believe that even though she says it. Santana doesn't believe it at all. There is no possible way that sleeping with Brittany could get better. But she gets it. They've only been dating for a few months, and they keep telling themselves that they should spend nights apart. Even if they kind of hate it.

After their goodbyes, which they said with their lips very close together for a few long minutes (interrupted by Quinn threatening to pour water on them if they don't stop), Brittany heads up to her room. When she gets there, Rachel is there and singing in the mirror as usual. "Hey Rach. How was break?"

"Excellent actually. My father's and I had Thanksgiving and watched Funny Girl as per tradition."

"Sounds…cool." Brittany still hadn't told Rachel that she has never actually seen Funny Girl. She knows all about it because Rachel talks about it all the time. But she's never seen it. She's not opposed, she's not very eager either.

"How was your break with Santana? Did you see Quinn at all?"

"It was excellent. Her family is great. And I didn't actually see Quinn until we drove her back with us." Brittany thought the sooner those two would quit being so ridiculous the better. But they'd figure it out for themselves.

"That's wonderful. I'm glad you had a good time. So. On the topic of breaks. I was wondering how you might like to come back to Ohio with me for the first week of Christmas break. My dad's want to meet you and they will pay for your bus ticket there, and then back to your place so it wouldn't cost you anything other that time away from your family if you wouldn't mind sparing it."

"Yes!" She says eagerly without even thinking about it. Then calms down her immediate excitement a little bit. "That sounds awesome Rach. Why do your dads want to meet me though?"

"I've just told them a lot about you. And since you're my roommate and one of my best friends they thought it might be fun. Are you sure you can go? Do you need to talk to your family?"

"Nope. I am positive." The next hour was filled with Brittany's story about her trip to New York City, which really just turned into Rachel reviews every Broadway musical that has ever existed ever. But Brittany didn't mind. She really hoped she'd get to see a big show like that some day.

She called Santana from the study room that no one was in surprisingly enough, when Rachel went back to singing.

"San guess what! Rachel invited me to her house for the first week of break! Isn't that awesome?!" Santana found that even though her initial reaction is jealousy, she wants to spend that time with Brittany, she's so happy because that means one less week in her parent's house. And knows she needs to call her mother tonight to talk about Christmas break options for Brittany.

She calls her mom after Brittany gets off the phone to run to the on campus store to get juice and cereal bar (essentials) before they close. She asks her mom how long she thinks it would be ok for Brittany to stay over break. Her mom (expectantly) tells her that maybe Brittany should spend Christmas with her family. And that It would be fine if she came right after New Years. Her mother would even buy the ticket as Brittany's Christmas gift. Santana thanked her and told her that she'd get her the exact date as soon as possible.

She wasn't totally excited about the prospect of Brittany spending almost two weeks at her parent's house. But it could be worse if she wasn't going to Rachel's. Plus that means, if she comes on the second, they will get to spend Brittany's birthday together on the fourth. She already knew part of Brittany's birthday gift, if Gabe can come through.

That night while lying in bed Brittany and Santana spent at least an hour texting each other. Santana doesn't tell her about the date her mami had set for Brittany being able to visit. Mostly they talked about things like how big Rachel's mouth got when she sang in the mirror, and how it's probably cruel to give a cat a mohawk but they both wanted to do it anyway. They also decided that this was a little bit like being punished, not being able to sleep with each other tonight.

When Brittany wakes up for classes Monday morning she checks her email and sees that the department secretary has her schedule for next semester and she is free to pick it up at any time. She gets it between her class and meeting Santana for lunch. She's not exactly sure how she can miss Santana since she's only not been with her for less than twenty-four hours, and she'd spent an entire week with her prior to that but she does. So when she sees her, and that smile she gets every time she sees Brittany, it's everything she can do to not jump on Santana and kiss her senseless. But she keeps it mostly cool. Can't stop the kiss though. Kind of like you can't stop magnets from sticking to fridges. Except better.

They go inside and get food and sit down in one of their usual tables. "We should make a study schedule for finals as soon as possible. I might just reserve one of those rooms in the Library for us if they aren't all already taken."

"Ok. We can do that now if you want? Or after we eat. Whenever. Oh! I got my schedule for next semester today."

" I didn't know you scheduled today."

"I didn't. My department schedules for us."

"Oh right. Dance is B.F.A. Ok. What did you get? Anything fun?"

"Yep. Hip Hop, that's exciting. And another improv class, and ballet."

"What about your other classes?" Santana had been secretly worrying about this for a while. Knowing that it would come up that there was a class she couldn't help Brittany with, or she'd be too busy to help Brittany.

"I don't remember." She dug around in her bag and handed Santana the sheet of paper. Santana looked at it. English II she could help with. But Environmental Geology she could not. And it had a lab.

Brittany watches Santana's face fall. "What's wrong San?"

"I just don't know anything about Environmental Geology." Brittany doesn't know why this matters at first, but then it hits her. The only reason she's gotten through her classes this semester is because she's had Santana with her. She starts playing with her fingers like she does when she's nervous. Santana grabs both of her hands with hers.

"We'll figure it out. Ok? Let's just eat lunch." She kissed Brittany's fingers before releasing her hands so that Brittany could eat her Lucky Charms and strawberry salad.

Santana can't stop thinking about what they're going to do. The first thing that comes to her mind is that Brittany could ask to get it switched. But she knows that's probably not an option because B.F.A programs are pretty set in which classes you can take and when you can take them. Her next thought, she could take the class too. But she's filled her science and lab blocks and she knows her schedule is going to be full next semester. She's waiting in the library finishing up some homework when she decides what she thinks might be the only solution. The idea had been in her head for a long time, most of the time that she's known Brittany.

She goes to a computer and types in "Office Learning Disabilities". She knew there must be one because Sam had to check in there once a semester and he was always forgetting about the meetings and Mercedes was always yelling at him for it. It turns out, according to the website, that the office was actually in the Library and was still open for a little while longer. She shut the computer off and grabbed her stuff and ran up there.

A woman sitting at the desk greeted her when she came in. "Hello, do you have an appointment?"

"No. I uh, I'm actually looking for information." The woman just stared at her for a moment, waiting for her to continue. "I don't know what I'm supposed to tell you, I'm sorry."

"It's ok. What kind of information do you need?"

"My girlfriend, she's really smart. But she has a really hard time learning. And I thought maybe if she came to talk to you guys, it might be easier for her. I just don't want her to struggle as much as she does."

"That's sweet of you. Why don't I give you this pamphlet with general information about learning disabilities? It's not worth either of you trying to learn much about specifics. Self-diagnosing is dangerous. Our number is on the back, so if she feels like it would be in her best interest to call, she can schedule an appointment with one of our counselors. Is that maybe what you were looking for?"

"I think so. Thank you." Santana folds the pamphlet up and puts it in her back pocket.

Halfway through dinner with Brittany she can't wait anymore. "Britt can I talk to you about something?" Brittany just looks at Santana, waiting for her to continue. "I think", she hesitates "I think that maybe you have a learning disability. I think you know that too." Brittany looks down at her plate, but Santana knows she has to get through this. "That doesn't mean you're stupid B. You're one of the smartest people I know. I just think you learn and understand things in a way that your teachers don't explain them to you."

"What do you mean?"

"Well, you don't learn a lot of your class stuff in class right?" Brittany nods towards the table again. She knows Santana isn't calling her stupid. But she desperately doesn't want her to be thinking it either. "But you do learn a lot when we go over it again together. So you are definitely learning just fine. Just not the way your professors teach. But I can't teach you things I don't know. I wish I could B. But we need to figure out how to keep your grades up and I think this could be it. They could help. You could at least talk to them right?"

"I could. I know you're right. I just hate that I need more help than everyone else learning. It makes me feel-"

"Don't even say it. You're not stupid. You are anything but stupid. I wouldn't date a stupid girl no matter how pretty she is." She winks at Brittany trying to lighten the mood. She gets a little smile in return. "So you'll call? If it doesn't work out we will figure something else out. You could maybe get your schedule changed to something I've taken, we'll think of something. But this first yeah?"

"Yeah." Brittany sounds a little more resolute. Santana thinks she looks embarrassed. And while theoretically she understands why someone would be embarrassed by this, she doesn't think Brittany should be. She's perfect. And this is just a thing about her. Not even a bad thing, just a thing. Something they'll get past and be fine with.

"Do you want me to come with you?"

"I think I can go on my own. I will call tomorrow. Ok?"

"Sounds perfect." Santana goes to eat a bite of her food when she remembers that she still hasn't told Brittany about what her mom said. "Totally different subject. I talked to my Mom about Christmas break. She said that you can come up right after New Years if you'd like and stay with us the rest of break. She'll even pay for your bus ticket as a Christmas gift to you."

"So I could spend my birthday with you?"

"Yep. And almost two weeks before school starts back up. And we could even go back to school early if we wanted some alone time."

"Mmmm. Alone time. What would we need that for?" Brittany says before taking a sip of her water and winking at Santana. Santana laughs and bumps the side of Brittany's leg with her foot.

"Love you."

"Love you too. Always." Brittany tells her back before stealing the last fry off of Santana's plate.

Brittany spends a lot of time being nervous for the appointment that she made on Friday with the Office for Students with Disabilities. She knows that she doesn't have anything to be nervous about. They promised her they wouldn't give her any tests without fair warning. But she is nervous.

So when Kurt calls her Wednesday afternoon to let her know that he won a manicure for two at a nail salon he used to go to, and he'd like to give it to her she thinks that's the perfect distraction. "But why don't you want it?" She asks, curious.

"Because I used to date a boy that works there and it's awkward now that I'm dating Blaine. So you go. Take whomever you'd like. You just have to use the coupon today or tomorrow. I'll drop it off at Santana's. Have fun!" Brittany thanks him and gets off the phone before texting Santana.

To Santana: Want to get manicures today or tomorrow? Kurt is dropping off a coupon for a manicure for two at your house for me.

From Santana: Yeah he just texted me about it. I can't though. It's bad for guitar playing. I'll go with you though?

To Santana: I'll just ask Rachel or Quinn or someone. Love you!

From Santana: You too babe. But Quinn is probably out. She's locked herself in her room working on a paper she procrastinated on. I'm sure hobbit will be in.

To Santana: Rude. But you're so hot.

From Santana: Don't you forget it.

Brittany laughed before calling Rachel. "Hey Rach just wondering if you might want to get a free manicure with me sometime today or tomorrow?"

"I would Brittany but I have practice time booked for all of those days plus the dust in the air could not possibly be good for my vocal cords. I'm sorry Brittany. Maybe Quinn though?"

"Maybe. Good luck. I'll talk to you later." They hung up and Brittany scrolled through her phone.

To Mercedes: Hey do you want to get a free manicure with me today or tomorrow?

When she got out of her class she had a response waiting for her from Mercedes.

From Mercedes: Hey girl. Sorry I can't. I promised Kurt I'd go with him today in solidarity to a different salon. Try Rachel?

To Mercedes: Maybe. Thanks anyway. Have fun!

She locked her phone and started towards the library to meet Santana for study time. They had made a schedule the day before in an effort to spend enough time studying without spending zero time sleeping.

The next morning Sam picks her up to go to the gym while Santana is still sleeping. Halfway through their work out they took a break. "What are you guys up to today? Studying I bet."

"Yeah. For a little while. We were going to take the night off. Kurt gave me this free manicure coupon thing for two but nobody can go with me. So I'm going to go do that by myself and then hang out at the apartment." Brittany seemed down about going to the salon by herself. Sam hated that look on Brittany. Hated it so much that…

"Well I was actually planning on getting a manicure soon so maybe I could just go with you. Save myself some money."

"You'd go with me?" Brittany's face instantly brightened. So quickly that had it been anyone else he might wonder if he'd just been tricked into going to a nail salon. But it's Brittany. And everything about her is genuine.

"Of course. You're my friend. It might be fun, I've never done it before."

"It's going to be so much fun!"

And that's how Sam ended up at a nail salon, arguing with a woman that he most certainly did not need a shiny top coat no matter how much she promised it would fade in twenty four hours. Because of a blue eyed blonde that reminded him of his little sister. And honestly, looked like she could desperately use a big brother. He knew she'd been through a lot. He could tell that by her personality, and he know that whatever happened at the dance concert was probably somehow related to all of that. But he wasn't going to ask. She would tell him when she was ready.

He might have avoided top coat, but he did not avoid "nail strengthener", whatever that was. She said it would make his nails break less. Which he didn't really have a problem with in the first place but whatever, if it would stop her from trying to put that shiny stuff on, he'd deal. Except this stuff was also shiny. He hoped it would rub off in the car.

Brittany had an awesome time. Turns out Sam is hilarious at nail salons. They were really nice to her, and some guy kept hitting on Sam and Brittany wondered if that was the guy that Kurt used to date. He seemed to be the only guy around, and if that was him Kurt was better off with Blaine. She chose the prettiest blue she'd ever seen as the color for her nails.

The entire way home Sam kept rubbing his nails on his jeans which amused Brittany to no end. When they got to the house he kept his hands in his pockets. Mercedes was there and Quinn had actually come out of her room and was semi relaxed because she apparently had gotten a lot done on her paper today.

Santana hugged Brittany and complimented her nails which really did look pretty. She wished she could have nice nails but that meant no guitar, and she liked it too much. Brittany liked it too. Lazy mornings spent laying in bed naked listening to Santana play were amazing to her.  
Santana offered Sam a drink and when he reached out to take it she saw that his nails looked awfully shiny. She wanted to make fun of him but Brittany had just looked so happy to have someone who could go with her, and she looked just as happy when they got back that she couldn't bring herself to knock down something that aided in that happiness.

"Nice nails bro." She was only human though. One little comment wouldn't hurt. Sam blushed, rightfully so. But nothing else was said about it.

After they'd been hanging out for about an hour Mercedes brought up what was on her mind since the dance concert. "So what happened? At the dance concert?"

Santana should have known Mercedes would bring it up eventually. She looked to Brittany about to step in but Brittany spoke first. "Before I came to school I was in a very bad relationship. I don't like talking about it though. He showed up. Santana's brothers handled it. I don't think he'll be back." Santana nodded and squeezed Brittany's hand tighter.

Sam walked over and gave Brittany a hug. "You know if you ever need anything you have me too right?" Brittany nodded. She knew that. Mercedes didn't say anything except a small apology and Quinn just nodded at her like it was ok that she didn't want to talk about it.

Truthfully, Quinn had suspected Brittany had been abused. She wasn't sure if it was family, or an ex boyfriend. But she displayed a lot of the classic signs. Looks like she had been right. Only, she had never wished so hard that she could be wrong in her whole life. To meet Brittany was to like her. You'd have to be some kind of person to hurt her.

Friday morning before her appointment she ran into Mike in the dance department. She hadn't really seen him since the dance concert. She hadn't been avoiding him but she knew he'd have questions, just like the others. But he had been there so his would probably be a lot more specific. They hung out for a little bit but it didn't come up at all. She was starting to get anxious.

"If you have questions about what happened at the dance concert you can ask."

"Nope. I pretty much figured out what was going on right there, between that and what Santana had told me. So we're good. It'll never happen again because I'll kill him before he touches you. And I'm sorry it ever got that far I was just caught off guard." He was very calm when he said it but she could feel the anger in his words. She hugged him and he loosened up. The topic immediately returned to a less tense subject when Mike asked about her schedule. They had Hip Hop class together. That made Brittany even more excited for the class.

When she got to the office for her appointment a little bit later she could tell her hands were shaking. She almost wished she could reconsider Santana's offer to be here. But this was her problem, and so long as she could deal with it herself she probably should. The secretary told her she could go back, so Brittany did. She went into the room with the number on the door that the secretary had told her to go into. A man greeted her, he seemed really nice.

"Sit Brittany. Please. My name is Patrick. Don't worry about last names they aren't important anyway. How are you? You look a little nervous?"

"I am. Sorry."

"You don't need to apologize this is kind of a nerve wracking thing. But I promise it'll be just fine. Why don't you tell me why you're here?"

"I just don't think I learn very well. My girlfriend is the only reason I can keep my grades where they are now. She has to pretty much re-teach me everything they teach me."

"Why do you think that is?"

"Because I can't listen and write at the same time. How can anyone? Those are two totally different things. Like trying to ride a bike and swim at the same time. It doesn't work for me."

"That's a really good analogy I think I'll have to steal that one." He chuckled. "Has it always been this way?"

"Yeah. I've never done well in school. I mostly just passed because my teachers didn't want to deal with me I think. I tried hard though. I had to. My parents wouldn't let me dance if I didn't do well."

"You dance?"

"All the time. It's like the only thing I'm good at really. That's why I'm here. I had bad grades but I'm a good dancer. But I have to keep my grades up or I lose my scholarship. Which is why I'm here. Because I can't lose it."

He continued asking questions for the better part of an hour. Asking her about her schooling when she was little. About how and if her parents had helped her with her homework. What subjects she liked, which ones gave her the most trouble, and how different school related situations made her feel.

"Well Brittany. It would require further testing if we wanted to medicate you, but I don't think that's what we want to do. But I'm fairly confident you have a mild case of ADHD as well as LD NOS. Do you know what those mean?"

"Not really. I mean I've heard of ADHD but I don't really know what it means. Isn't that really hyper kids that act out and stuff? I'm not like that."

"It can be like that. But you have found ways all on your own to deal with your excess energy. Which, by the way, shows that you are very self aware. I can tell how smart you are Brittany. I just think maybe we need to help you figure out how channel that in a way that is conducive to learning. Here's what ADHD means to you, because what it means in general isn't very important. For you, I think that it means it's hard to focus your mind when you're also being made to sit still. I don't think you have it really bad, which is why you've managed to use dance and exercise to help you. Does that make sense?"

"Kind of. I would definitely rather be moving than sitting in a classroom."

"You get it then. We can't make classrooms more interesting, but we can make them less confusing which might help make them a little more interesting. LD NOS means Learning Disorder Not Otherwise Specified. That one is a little more broad in the sense that it means if you display traits of having a learning disability, but not enough traits for just one, then it's hard to diagnose. But again, for you, the important part is that it just means you learn differently. Which isn't a bad thing. That's why writing and listening are hard for you to do at the same time. And we have things to help you with that too. Would you like to discuss those things now? Or do you want to go home and think about all of this? I don't want to overwhelm you."

"No I want to know now!" If he thought he could help her, this could mean being less afraid of losing her scholarship. And maybe even a little less time studying.

"Ok! I'm glad you're excited. Some people take the idea of being diagnosed as a bad thing. But I think you get what I'm saying, the specifics aren't important. How we deal with them is. Right? Ok. So, learning is a skill. You sometimes have to be taught how. So I'd like to recommend that you set up two sessions a week with one of our tutors."

"I tried tutoring. It didn't work."

"You were probably being tutored by some student who wasn't being paid enough to care about you. The tutors we have here, that's there job. To care and to help. So they're much better at it. They are general tutors so they can help you with most of your subjects so you don't need a different tutor for each one, but most importantly, they can help you learn how to learn better. So that you hopefully won't always need to learn things more than once. The other thing that I think you will like is that we can talk to your professors for you. Tell them that you require a little extra help, and that we would like it if they sent us their notes for the lectures. So that way you don't have to write during class. You focus on listening, and we'll give you the notes in advance. Not all professors have that as an option though, so for the ones that can't, we'll give you this little thing." He pulled a small silver box out of his drawer.  
"It's a digital recorder. You just set it out at the start of class, push the button and then stop it at the end. Then at the end of the day, upload the files onto your computer and email them to the office and they will type the notes out for you and email them back. "

"You can do all of that?"

"Of course we can. We can do almost anything that we need to do to make sure that you are learning the best way you can. Not everyone can just go to class and do homework and be fine. I couldn't when I was in school. More of your fellow classmates than you guess can't either."

"What do I need to do then?" She was waiting for the other shoe to drop. This sounded too good to be true. Someone would help her with her homework, someone who wasn't just doing it because they were paid, or because they loved her like Santana did. Someone else could care that she stayed in school with her scholarship too. Then it hit her. "Does this cost a lot of money? I don't have any money and my parents won't pay for it." He was going to tell her he's sorry but he can't help now, she knew it.

"Doesn't cost you a penny. The school pays for it all. It's a service they provide. The only thing you need to do is register with us, which just means filling out this sheet of paper. Everything else, we'll handle for you if possible. And if it's not possible, we'll help you figure out what you need to do. Ok?" Brittany nodded and she took the sheet of paper and filled it out, signing her name. Before she handed back the paper she had one more question.

"You guys won't tell my parents will you? I think they'd be mad at me." Patrick had to stop himself from frowning. Poor kid.

"No. Definitely not. It's totally confidential except the information that you've just signed that we can give to your professors. Other than that, everything is just between us. I'm sorry that you've had to struggle with this your whole life Brittany. But we're going to try and make it easier now. Ok?" Brittany nodded and tried not to cry. But it was hard. She had struggled. She had missed dance so many times because she wasn't smart enough. She wasn't going to be allowed to go to school away from home because she wasn't smart enough. She worried every single day that she was going to have to switch to the school her parents wanted her to be in and lose Santana because she wasn't smart enough. But now it could be easier, at least a little bit.

She left the office after a handshake from Patrick where she had to hold back her urge to hug him. They scheduled a meeting for on first day of classes after Christmas break for the new semester and for once, school didn't feel so overwhelming. She couldn't wait to tell Santana.  
Santana reacted almost exactly how Brittany had thought she did. First she was defensive about some guy making snap decisions about her having learning disabilities. But that faded into a smile and a heavy sense of gratitude when she learned of all the ways he had said he could help Brittany. Someone was going to help Brittany, and Santana thought that nobody deserved it more than her. She was glad that if she couldn't fix it, they had found someone who could.

But they still had to get through this semester's finals with decent grades, so if they weren't sleeping or eating or in class they were studying. Brittany wasn't concerned about her dance classes. They were mostly just a fun part of her day, they didn't cause her stress and she knew she'd pass whatever they gave her as a final. It was the other classes that worried her. Studying pushed all thoughts and anxieties about going home out of her head, as well as her anxieties about Christmas. She barely had any money, she had no idea what she was going to do for a gift for Santana.

She couldn't tell if she was glad or more nervous when Santana brought it up while they were studying at the coffee shop for a change of pace. "Hey B. Can we talk about Christmas for a minute?"

"Ok."

"First, do you want to do Christmas before we leave, or when you get to my house in January."

"January for sure."

"Thank God. I was hoping you'd say that." Brittany was relieved that it seemed like Santana didn't have a gift for her yet either.

"San I don't have a lot of money."

"I know B. That's fine. You could literally draw a heart on a post it note and I'd be happy."

"Well I'm going to do more than that. But you can't spend a lot on me."

"But I-"

"San. I'll feel bad. Promise you won't."

"I will do my best." But they both knew that Santana's definition of not a lot and Brittany's varied. Brittany just hoped that whatever she could come up with would make up for the fact that it couldn't cost very much.

Finals went as well as could be expected. As predicted, Brittany totally aced her dance finals. Santana did well on her Piano practical exams as well. She wasn't taking any voice classes this semester, and piano was pretty much the easiest thing in the world for her. To be honest, Santana was really only nervous about Brittany's finals. She had breezed through all of hers. Brittany wouldn't say she breezed through hers, not at all. But she thinks she managed to at least do well enough to keep her grades where they are now, which means she would be within the range to keep her scholarship. Which is all she cared about. That, and making Santana proud.

By some stroke of luck both of them finished finals Wednesday evening so they had all day Thursday to spend together. Before Brittany left with Rachel Friday afternoon. She was pretty much packed, she had done it on nights spent in her room. She finished what she had left on Wednesday before Santana picked her up to go back to her apartment.

They both wanted to stay up and have fun and relax. Do whatever. All the things they couldn't when they were busy with finals, but instead they fell asleep cuddled together before ten because they were both exhausted.

Santana had learned earlier during finals week that Brittany had never been ice skating. Which sounded ridiculous because she thought it was something Brittany would probably like very much. So after they'd both gotten up and Santana had made breakfast, she told Brittany they were going on a surprise date. "Really?! But I don't have anything here to wear I'll have to go back to my room to change."

"Nope. You can wear that. You just need to be warm, that's all."

"Where are we going?"

"Surprise. Put your shoes on and grab some gloves and a scarf."

They pulled into the ice skating rink and Brittany was bouncing all over her seat. She could barely contain her excitement. Santana hoped that her excitement wouldn't translate to Brittany falling every few seconds.

It didn't. She should have known Brittany, who manages to look graceful even when she's falling over the couch, would be an excellent ice skater. She managed to match Santana's skill level after about half an hour. While a slight pride hit for Santana, she was excited that she'd found something else that they both liked.

When they were both nearly frozen they decided to call it quits and head to the coffee shop for some hot chocolate. On the way in Brittany sees a flier that is advertising an open mic night. She points it out to Santana.

"Yeah I saw that. I don't know. I've never played or sang in this kind of setting. I don't know how it will go. They probably are mostly only looking for original stuff or something which I don't have a lot of right now. I don't even know who to talk to. I don't know. Let's just go inside."

She was hearing a lot of negative things that Santana was saying. But she still sounded like she wanted to do it, and she looked like she wanted to do it. While they drank their hot chocolate she decided this could maybe be part of her Christmas gift. Giving Santana the push she needed to play for others. It was clearly something she'd thought about before but was nervous about it. Brittany could help her.

After they walked out of the door to the coffee shop Brittany pretended that she left her phone inside. Santana said she'd go start the car while Brittany ran back in to grab it. She went straight to the counter and asked the barista about open mic night. He said it's for anything. They have musicians, poets, and comedians. So anything goes really. She asked how far in advance they book, and he said only a week or two usually.

"Do you think there's anything I could do to maybe book my girlfriend for the one right after school starts? I want it to be part of her Christmas gift. She's too nervous to set it up on her own. I promise she's amazing. Is there anything I can do at all?"

"Just tell her to have a killer fifteen minute set. Merry Christmas." Brittany returned the sentiment as she ran out of the door and into Santana's car. Now she just had to manage to not spill what had her so excited.

As Thursday night came however, the day lost the excitement that it had held with ice skating and Christmas gifts as they both were faced with the truth that they'd have to spend more time apart than they ever had since meeting each other. Santana had suspected that the night would be filled with sex since they hadn't had much time for that the past few weeks, and they wouldn't be seeing each other for a while. But it seemed they were both just as content to hold each other close, sharing sweet kisses and trying to enjoy the time they had rather than be nervous about spending so much time apart.

Eventually they fell asleep which of course meant the morning came too soon. They got up before Santana's alarm though. Grateful for a few extra conscious (or mostly so) minutes with each other before Santana took Brittany and Rachel to the bus station. While Brittany was pulling bags out of the trunk Santana pulled Rachel aside and began to try to threaten Rachel, but was cut off.

"It's ok Santana, I know you're going to miss her a lot. I promise to make sure she has a great time. Have a good Christmas Santana." And Rachel hugs her before going to help Brittany get the last bag out. Maybe Rachel isn't so bad. Santana will never say it out loud though.

The goodbye was embarrassingly tearful between the two of them (and Rachel who watched with rapt attention, the drama was beautiful) but Santana was too caught up in the fact that she wouldn't see Brittany until January 2nd to be concerned with who saw her with all those tears in her eyes. They kissed a hundred times, or maybe a thousand before Rachel tugged Brittany's sleeve and told her they needed to get inside or they'd miss the bus. With one last kiss and a promise to text a thousand times a day, Brittany walked away from Santana and into the bus station. She decided that she'd like to not make a habit of walking away from Santana, if at all possible, because this hurt pretty bad.

Brittany gets Rachel even better pretty much as soon as she meets her dads. It's like the mannerisms of the two of them combined and made a Rachel. It's kind of awesome. She guesses Santana is the same way, but it's not nearly as obvious. Brittany had been nervous to meet them. Rachel assured her that she need not worry and that they already liked her but Brittany couldn't understand how that would be true. But Rachel had been correct. As soon as they got into the bus station two very loud men ran at them one hugged Rachel and the other saw her, "You must be Brittany!" and hugged her as well. Then they switched. It was the strangest welcome she'd ever received from an adult but it was kind of nice. They clearly were excited about her being here as well.

After the hugs came introductions and Brittany learned that she would not have to deal with the confusion of calling them Mr. and Mr. Berry as they insisted she call them Leroy and Hiram. Brittany had been texting Santana the entire bus ride but still wanted to let her know she was here.

To Santana: I'm here. Rachel's parents would make you laugh, they are just like her. They seem really nice.

She didn't have to wait long for a response.

From Santana: Good. So you're safe? Happy? Everything is ok? I just miss you Britt. Tons and tons.

Brittany couldn't stop herself from smiling. Santana worried too much. "Ohhhh I see that smile Miss Brittany. Texts from the girlfriend?" Hiram teased. His husband slapped his arm.

"I uh…yeah. How did you know?"

"Rachel tells us pretty much everything." Leroy explained.

"I'm sorry is that ok that I told them? I was just happy for you."

"No Rach it's fine. I'm pretty happy about her too." They stopped and got take home food. They didn't even give Brittany the option of paying for her own. Which was really nice of them. She only had forty dollars. Twenty of which she suspiciously "found" in a hoodie that she knew Santana had been wearing but Santana swore it wasn't her money. She didn't carry cash. But Brittany knew it wasn't hers either.

They had prepared the guest room for her, they said, but feel free to sleep anywhere. Brittany imagined how funny it would be if they walked into the kitchen and found her sleeping on the floor. But the guest bedroom was better than the floor.

Santana and Quinn left later than they had intended to go home but packing sucked. Everything reminded her of Brittany. Brittany's stuff was everywhere. She was cleaning and packing in tandem and had an entire basket full of Brittany's clothes. She set aside a hoodie and a pair of sweat pants to take with her. She didn't wash them because they just smelt like Brittany and it might make sleeping without her suck a little less. Whatever. But she decided to wash the rest because it was a little weird to bring her girlfriends unwashed underwear to her parent's house.

But they got on the road eventually. Quinn reading the cute texts out loud to Santana and responding exactly like she said to. "Hey Q. Do you maybe want to go into the city Monday?"

"Sure. Why?"

"Christmas shopping."

"Oh you mean Brittany shopping? Sure. Just let me know what time." Santana is stuck on this gift buying thing. She knows what she wants to buy Brittany. Something beautiful. Something that says this girl has somebody that loves her very much. Something that she can wear all the time. She wants to buy her a ring. But she thinks the idea of a promise ring is a little immature and she's also still a little shy about scaring Brittany away. She wishes Brittany wouldn't have told her something not expensive. Because she has money, and she wants to spend it on her girl. But she wants to respect Brittany's wishes, as best she can anyway. So Quinn there to reign her in might help a little.

That night they talked on the phone but they didn't have much to say because they'd been talking all day anyway. But they whispered good night, and I miss you, and I love you a million times.

The weekend for Santana was spent mostly moping around the house. She did have some good news when Gabe drove up to give her part Brittany's birthday gift. He hung out with her for a while, and, as usual, checked her car for any issues that it might be having. But for the most part she hung out with her mami, and played video games. And of course spent a lot of time texting Brittany, who thankfully, seemed to be having a good time.

Rachel's dads were awesome. They treated her just like they treated Rachel. They asked her questions and requested proper notification of any and all dance performances. Saturday they spent the day at various stores shopping for the rest of what the Berry's needed for Hanukkah and Christmas. At one of the stores Brittany saw a pretty dress. One that Santana would love on her she thought. She eyed it for a while and then Rachel suggested she try it on, just to see. So she did, and it fit perfect. But trying it on wasn't smart because now she was even more sad that she couldn't have it.

That night they exchanged gifts for Hanukkah and Brittany was just content to be there, and be celebrating something without fighting. Everything was happy and loving and it was something Brittany thought that maybe she could build with Santana in the future. She was thinking about that when a package was put on her lap by a smiling Leroy. She looked up in confusion. "It's for you. We bought it. Happy Hanukkah and Merry Christmas." Brittany gently undid the bow of the box. She carefully slid the top of the box and pulled the tissue paper off of the top. She gasped when she saw the dress there that she had tried on at the store. She gently touched the fabric before looking up at the smiling Berry's.

"I don't know what to say. Thank you so much." She slid the box off of her lap and stood up to hug each of them in turn. She had seen the price tag on the dress, it was pretty expensive. Why would they do this? Her own parents never got her anything she actually wanted for Christmas. They got her things they wanted her to have. She tried to keep her emotions in check, both extremely happy to have all of the wonderful people in her life, but terribly sad that she had spent the first eighteen, nearly nineteen years without them.

That night she kept Santana on the phone longer telling her about her day, and then just talking about nothing. She missed Santana. She wanted to share these wonderful things with her. She falls asleep that night picturing what their apartment would look like for Christmas in the future.

The next morning Rachel and Brittany were just hanging out in her bedroom when Brittany brought up a topic she felt like Rachel had been avoiding. "So have you talked to Quinn since we left?"

"Oh. Yes, yes I have. Some texting. Why?"

"Just curious. Have you guys ever talked about the Halloween party?"

"Not really. I'm not really sure how to bring it up to be honest with you."

"Do you like her?"

"You get right to the point don't you. I do. Yes. But again, I'm not really sure how to go forward with that. I don't know that she likes me."

"She definitely likes you. Duh Rach. It's completely obvious."

"How do I get her to talk about it then? She feels so closed off sometime."

"She reads these super old romantic books all the time. They used to do big gestures you know? Romantic things. Try that. Don't just tell her you're into her. Show her."

"That is very Broadway."

"Sure." Meanwhile she was shooting a text off to Santana.

To Santana: Rachel is def into Quinn. Just talked to her about it.

From Santana: Genius. I'm with Quinn. I'll talk to her about it. Matchmaking!

From Santana: Oh and I love you!

To Santana: Love you too.

"Hey Q." Santana said as she selected the next level on the game she and Quinn were playing. Quinn was absolutely terrible, but Santana appreciated the effort. "What's going on with you and Berry? Are you into that?"

"Why do you ask?"

"Just curious. After Halloween we hadn't really talked about it."

"Neither have Rachel and I."

"Well?"

"Of course I like her Santana, how could I not. She's amazing. Have you heard her sing?"

"Stop I'll gag."

"And you'd deserve it too. With everything I have to put up with with you and Brittany."

"Whatever. You're jealous."

"A little."

"Tell her Q. She likes you."

"She's going big places Santana. She'll be a star on Broadway if she wants it. I might teach English if I'm lucky. She deserves better."

"Maybe you should let her make that call."

"Whatever. You better start pay attention or I might accidentally win this round."

To Brittany: Yeah. She's into Berry too.

From Brittany: Knew it.

On Monday Santana met Quinn so they could travel into the city together. She didn't even know where to go, but Quinn had a few suggestions about some areas that had a lot of little independently owned stores. They went in and out of several, and Santana saw a lot of things that she both liked, and thought Brittany would like. But nothing perfect. She knew she wanted jewelry. She knew whatever it was she wanted it to be something that Brittany would wear often. So it couldn't be something very specific. They got some lunch and then restarted their search.

They walked into a store that, honestly, Santana would have passed if it weren't for Quinn insisting she wanted to check it out. They went inside and Santana found that she could easily ignore the dust in favor of looking at all of the beautiful silver things the shop housed. She heard some noise towards the back of the shop and a man was sitting there working at a small station with a lot of little tools that Santana had never seen before.

"Hello Ma'am. Can I help you with anything?"

"I was just looking around. Do you make all of these things?"

"No, not all of them. But some of it. I have other artists that sell out of the store, and I teach classes and my students sell some of their work out of here."

"It's all really beautiful."

"Are you looking for something in particular? A special gift?"

"I am actually. Something for my girlfriend."

"Come over here. Look at these." He grabs a cane that had been hanging off of his workbench and leads Santana over to a small case. "I make these bracelets. They're charm bracelets, and see they have all kinds of little charms you could buy. But I make all of them. So you'll never have two that are the exact same."

Santana knew this was it. They were so beautiful, but delicate. More delicate than any other charm bracelet she'd ever seen. And she loved that Brittany would have the only one exactly like it. It was expensive, but she didn't care. This was it. She wanted to give it to Brittany so bad. She loved that she could keep buying new charms for holidays. "I want one. And I want that little heart with the gem in it. And that little B" She thought about it for a second and then reconsidered. "No. The little S instead."

The old man winked at her as he pulled the trinkets out of the case. He walked over to the counter and put them in a small box before handing it to her. She paid him, and went to find Quinn after thanking the man profusely and promising she'd be back.

"What's that? Did you find something?" Santana bit her bottom lip and nodded, opening to show Quinn the contents. "San that's beautiful. But how much did it cost?"

"Doesn't matter. It's not about the money. This was it."

It was the day before Brittany was scheduled to leave Ohio to head home to Pennsylvania. She didn't want to leave but it wasn't polite to ask to stay. Plus she knew the sooner that she left the sooner that she'd get to Santana. They were walking around the downtown area waiting for Rachel's dad to get done running into work before they were meeting Leroy for a goodbye dinner for Brittany.

Brittany was looking for a picture frame. She found a picture on Quinn's computer when she was borrowing it for something else. It was Santana and her laying on the couch during one of the movie nights. Santana was laying on her back and Brittany was laying on Santana's stomach. Santana was watching the movie, and she was just looking at Santana's face, with Santana's arms around her. The picture looked sweet, and very much them. They didn't have any pictures printed together so she thought it might be a nice gift, she asked Quinn not to show Santana. But she needed to buy a picture frame, so that's why they were in yet another antique store.

"How about this one?"

"It's not very Santana." She was having a hard time finding something that Santana would like and was within her price range, which was really kind of low. She continued walking around the store when she saw what she was looking for. It was beautiful and detailed. Silver, It was beautiful and simple but complex and exactly what she wanted to get. She picked it up as Rachel walked over.

"Oh that one is beautiful."

"It's perfect." Brittany responded as she flipped over the frame to look at the price tag. Forty dollars. Which was over every penny she had. And she still needed money to get a cab to the bus after New Years, plus get the picture printed. There was no way. She shook her head and put the frame back on the shelf before walking away to check and see if Santana had texted her.

Rachel had no idea why Brittany had no money. Her parents seemed well off enough. But for whatever reason, it seemed Brittany had very little. But Rachel knew this was the frame Brittany wanted, she also knew that Brittany didn't have the ability to get Santana very much for Christmas and that idea made her sad. So Rachel did what she could to help, and as sneaky as she could, bought the frame and slipped it into her own purse.

The next day Santana was once again playing video games with Quinn. Nervous because she knew Brittany was heading back to the last place on earth Santana wanted her to be. She heard her phone go off so she pulled it out of her pocket with one hand trying to play the game with the other.

From Brittany: I miss orgasms.

"Holy shit." She said, unable to stop herself.

"What?"

"Nothing."

To Brittany: I miss giving them to you. As soon as we can baby.

A few hours later Brittany arrived at the bus stop. She got her bag and walked out to the parking lot, she looked around for either of her parent's or her sister's cars and saw nothing.

To Santana: I'm here. Arrived safe.

From Santana: Everything ok so far?

To Santana: Eh. I think they forgot or something, nobody is here. I'm gonna call them. I'll text you when I get home.

First she dialed her mother's number and got nothing. Then her sister, still nothing. And finally her father. Nothing. So she waited for a little while before trying all three again. Still nothing. So finally she called the cab company and had them take her home. It cost eighteen dollars with a tip. Which left her twenty-two dollars to get a frame, print the picture, and get a cab back to the bus station after New Years. Maybe she'd just walk. It was only a few miles.

Nobody was home when she got there so she brought her stuff up to her room and started to unpack. She was about halfway through taking her stuff out when she found a bag in there that she knew she didn't pack. She took it out and opened it and saw the frame she had fell in love with at the antique store. Tears came to her eyes. Constantly aware of the two very different kinds of people in her life.

To Rachel: Thank you. So much.

From Rachel: Anytime Brittany. You know that.

She heard the garage door open so she went downstairs to see who it was. Her mother came in a few minutes later and saw her. "Oh I forgot you were coming home today. Did your sister pick you up?"

"No. Took a cab."

"Oh. Ok. Well I've got to go back out actually. I won't be home till late. Order food, there's nothing here." She put a twenty on the counter and walked back out. Maybe if she just keeps not being home for all of break, things won't be so bad Brittany thought as she pocketed the twenty, and then looked in the pantry for food so she could save the money for the cab ride. She ate some soup before going upstairs to call Santana.

The next day when she finally came down her mother was clearly on her way out again. She handed Brittany another twenty and told her to order something. Brittany figured that she could just make something from the pantry again and then she'd have forty dollars and could buy Santana something else for Christmas. She kind of had an idea of what she'd like to get her. There was this store that sold really pretty journals. And Santana was always pulling scraps of paper from everywhere to take notes or write down a song she was thinking about.

She took the bus to the shopping center that had the store she was thinking about and went in. She always thought the store smelt a little weird but the leather bound notebooks were so pretty. She walked around the store till she found the section that was in her price range.  
They were all lovely, but she found one that was particularly beautiful. And the pattern burnt into the leather reminded her a little of the picture frame she had already gotten. She picked it up and brought it up to the counter.

"I'd like to buy this please."

"Good choice. I really like that one. You know these are reusable? You can just take the used notebook out, and put a new one of the same size in. Pretty cool huh? Want anything engraved into it?" Of course she did. But she didn't have the money.

"That's ok. This is the most I can spend."

"On the house kid. What do you want on it?" Having something personal would make this even better! But she hadn't been prepared. So she thought about it for a few minutes. She loved poetry. But most of the ones she knew weren't about love or were too long. But then she remembered one. She pulled out her phone and looked it up just to confirm the words.

"Because I love you doesn't feel like enough. Then love knew it was called love. And when I lifted my eyes to your name, suddenly your heart showed me my way. Could you write that?"

"That's really pretty. Sure. It'll just take a few minutes."

"Oh could you put S + B under that?"

"Definitely." He engraved the poem onto the cover and let it cool for a moment before wrapping it in tissue paper and putting it in a box and handing it to Brittany. She gave him the money, and got her change and left. On the way home she got off a stop early and went to the drug store to get the picture printed for Santana. By time she got home she was cold, but extremely happy that she had been able to get more for Santana than she had thought she would.

Most of her time at her house was spent at home on her computer and texting Santana. She didn't have any friends in town any more, and she was afraid to go out and see if she could find any of the people that she might have liked to have been friends with at local hang outs because she had no idea if Tommy was in town or not. And the last thing in the world that she wanted was to run into him.

Santana could tell, that despite Brittany's insistence that things were ok, things weren't very ok. The texts came pretty much non stop. Which didn't bother Santana so much as it made her worry. The phone calls were longer too. When she was at Rachel's she'd call and they'd talk for about half an hour before bed. But now she was talking to her at least twice a day on the phone, conversations at night lasting until one or both of them were too tired to keep talking.

Friday before Christmas Brittany's mom woke her up in the morning. "Brittany come on we've got to go to your consultation in an hour."

"What?"

"Your plastic surgery consultation. Get out of bed. I'm sure you need to shower first."

"I don't want that. I don't want surgery."

"You don't know what you're talking about. You haven't even talked to the doctors."

"No I'm not going."

"You will go." She took a deep breath. "Listen, go to the doctors and then if you don't want to have the surgery well obviously I can't force you."

"Fine." That didn't sound so bad. Go talk to a doctor and then her mom would accept her not having the surgery. By the time they got to the surgeons Brittany was positive this wasn't going to be so bad. She could probably just tell the doctor that she wasn't interested and then maybe it would go faster. She didn't tell Santana that she was going. She thought it would just make her mad. But she would tell her when she got home.

When they got into the examination room the doctor came in and told Brittany to take off her shirt. She hesitated, her mother urging her along. "I thought this was just an appointment where we talked about things."

"No I need to take pictures, we need to agree on a size."

"But I-I'm not sure if I w-want to do this. Mom you said I didn't have to."

"Brittany take off your damn shirt it's just a consultation we can talk about this at home."

Brittany slid off the table and lifted her shirt over her head.

"Bra too. Nurse, ready the camera." Brittany's hands were shaking as she slid off her bra. She knew in the back of her head that if she felt uncomfortable she shouldn't have to do this. But she didn't know how to stop what was happening. It felt completely out of her control.

She stood in front of a screen as this strange man said a lot of things she didn't understand, or couldn't hear because of how uncomfortable he was as he palmed her breasts, drawing dashed lines across her chests, and circles around her nipples. Arrows. X's. He mentioned as he pressed his fingers into the lines of her abdominal muscles that a little lipo-suction wouldn't hurt to define her muscles.

She spent the entire session trying not to cry. When he showed her the pictures of what her chest could look like if she was enlarged to a D, she didn't even look. She didn't care. She wanted Santana. She didn't want bigger boobs she just wanted someone who loved her the way she was. And she had that person about six hours away. She'd see her soon. She just kept her focus on that.

On their way out of the office, her mother mentions that bigger boobs would probably help her get a job in dancing. It was never more clear to Brittany that her mother has no idea who she is, and what she does. Furthermore, her mother also didn't care.

All she wanted to do was get home and crawl into bed and call Santana. Unfortunately her mother had other plans, which involved a million errands all over town. Brittany kept her distance, and responded to Santana's texts as she received them, not wanting to worry her.

Something was wrong with Brittany. Her answers were short and lacked and sense of who Brittany was. But any time Santana asked if she was ok Brittany just said yes, and that she'd call when she got home. Santana thought it possible that her mood was because she was being forced to spend time with her mother.

Brittany got home around 9:00pm and went upstairs and showered immediately. Scrubbing desperately at the faded marks still not completely wiped from her chest. She got out and went into her room, before she even got dressed she laid down in bed and called Santana.

"Hey Baby. You're finally home."

"Yeah I came home and showered. Today sucked Santana." Santana could hear Brittany's voice break a little.

"What's wrong Britt?" She cooed.

"My mother made me go to a consultation with the plastic surgeon about the boob job she still wants me to get."

"Fuck Br-"

"I told her no. She said if I went to the consultation and I didn't want them still, I didn't have to get them because she can't make me. So I'm not doing it."

"Ok. Are you ok though? You sound so sad?"

"It was just not a good feeling being there. He drew all over my chest and told me that I should get lipo to make my abs better. And my mom kept saying how it would help me get a job. But I don't need help San. I'm a good dancer."

"He touched you? Was he completely professional? He didn't hurt you did he Brittany?"

"No he didn't hurt me. And he was professional. I just hated feeling like I was just something he could change to make better."

"He couldn't make you better. You're beautiful, and amazing. Your body is perfect. So perfect B."

"I love you."

"Oh baby. I love you too." Santana said gently. Trying to convey everything she could to Brittany through the phone. Love. Admiration. Everything.

"Stay with me till I fall asleep? Unless you're busy. Are you with Quinn? I'm sorry if I'm bothering you."

"Not at all. I will stay on the phone with you as long as you want. I love talking to you."

Santana put the controller down and mouthed sorry to her brother who waved her off and she headed into her room and closed the door. "Can I put the phone down so I can get changed?" She got undressed and then climbed into her bed picking the phone back up. "Ok I'm back."

The conversation switched to much more pleasant topics after that. Brittany had started to think about Birthday plans but Santana told her not to worry about it. She had everything planned out. They talked about what Santana had done that day, and how her brothers were doing. Every little thing they could think of. Eventually Brittany stopped talking at all, and Santana could just hear her deep breathing through the phone. She knew that this was when Brittany had intended for the conversation to end but she couldn't bring herself to hang up the phone. If she closed her eyes this almost felt like they were back at school and Brittany was in her arms, and the sound of her breathing lulled Santana to sleep.

Brittany spends the next two days in her room watching movies on her laptop. She'd leave occasionally to get food and to sleep. Nobody questioned it and nobody asked her to come out. She barely heard her dad come and go, and hadn't said more than a few words to him since she'd been home. On Christmas Eve she came down at her mother's orders for an early dinner, which was awkward. Nobody really talked to each other. Her mother and sister talked the most but even that was stilted and uninteresting to her.

After dinner her mother called her into the kitchen to help with the dishes. When they were finished she'd put the towel down and went to go upstairs. Before she got out of the kitchen though, her mother stopped her again.

"Tomorrow Tommy is coming over for Christmas dinner, do you have anything presentable to wear? You can borrow something from your sister if you need to."

"I can't see him." She feels panic building in her chest. "He can't come here. I don't want him near me." She started to back up.

"You will see him. And you will do your best to make yourself look nice." Brittany shook her head back and forth.

"No. I can't. You can't do this."

"God Brittany, You're so fucking stupid. You can't do any better than him. Do you understand that?" Brittany's breath caught in her throat. Talk Brittany. Now is not the time to freeze up, she yelled at herself.

"No! I don't want anything to do with him!" she screamed at her mother. This was new, she nearly never stood up for herself and she would never raise her voice. Anger and hatred flashed across her mothers face as she raised her hand back and back handed Brittany across the face so hard she felt her neck strain with the force.

"You're an idiot. What do you think your little dance degree is going to do anything for you? You'll leave school and become a stripper or something. Nobody would ever put up with you. Who would? That boy is a saint, still with the patience to deal with you? You take this opportunity now because I refuse to take care for you for the rest for your life. You've been a burden for eighteen years now and I will not continue to carry that around."

Brittany couldn't stop the tears falling from her eyes. She didn't have any response. Was she that big of a burden? She couldn't breathe with the effort she was putting forth to keep the sobs at bay. But she was failing, and for the first time in a very long time she found herself crying in front of her mother.

"Fucking pull yourself together Brittany. He is coming to dinner tomorrow. Now get out of my sight you ungrateful little bitch and find a way to cover that up."


	16. Chapter 16

**AN:** Thanks to my beta as always. And thank all of you for reviewing last chapter! Let's continue that trend.

* * *

Brittany can't catch her breath. But she can't stop crying either. Her mother walked away, she didn't know where she went. She forces herself to walk up the stairs towards her bedroom. She wants to call Santana. She needs Santana. But she can't get anything out but sobbing noises. She finds her phone and takes a deep breath and hits number one on her speed dial. She listens to it ring and then hears a click, her heart leaps a little but then she hears Santana's voice mail message play. She leaves a message and collapses on her bed, sobs wracking her body once again.

Santana heard her phone ring. And she knew it was Brittany, because Brittany has her own ring tone. But her brother yells at her to finish the round of game they're playing. She does because she's sure Brittany is just calling because she's bored or she misses her, but she can't help but think that it's weird that she's calling right now. Santana was sure she was supposed to be doing dinner or something. She throws the round, which her brother comments on, and gets up and grabs her phone. She listens to the voice mail.

"Santana? Call me? Please." The words alone would have caused alarm but Brittany's broken voice tells her that something was very wrong. She doesn't have time to dwell on how much she hates herself for not just picking up the phone, or how horribly that voice hurts her. She immediately calls Brittany back. She hears the phone pick up but all that comes through is muffled sounds of Brittany sobbing.

"Brittany what's wrong?" No response. "Brittany please." Santana is starting to panic a little bit now. "Baby please tell me what's wrong?" She tries again, gentler this time. She can hear Brittany trying to regain control of her ability to speak so she just waits it out, occasionally telling her to take deep breaths. Her own panic mounting.

After a few minutes, in the smallest voice Santana has ever heard come from Brittany, she tells her what happened. "My-my mom told me that Tommy is coming to dinner tomorrow night." A sob broke from her body. "Santana she hates me." She broke down again. But Santana was already looking for a sweatshirt.

"I'm coming. I'll be there as soon as I can."

"You d-don't have to-"

"Yes. Brittany you are my girlfriend. I promised I would do whatever I had to do to keep you safe. And you are not safe. I'm coming to get you. You need to let me keep my promise."

"O-Ok." She sniffed.

"I will be there as soon as I can. Ok baby? I want you to pack your stuff and stay in your room. If you have to leave a note you can do it on your way out when I get there. I need you to text me your address as soon as we get off the phone. Ok?"

"Ok."

"And I want you to keep texting me or calling me, whichever. I just need you to keep telling me that you're ok. Ok? I love you baby and I am going to be there as soon as I can."

"I love you too." Brittany wasn't going to try and protest any more anyway. She wanted Santana. She needed her. She needed help to make the hurt stop. They hung up the phone and Brittany did as Santana had said, and started to pack her things.  
Santana is freaking out. She was putting every effort into keeping her anger down. Getting mad, acting on that anger right now was not going to help her girlfriend. Who currently needed her, and was too far away. She had known that something was going to happen. She should have insisted that Brittany come with her for Christmas. She should have just told her mom that she would spend Christmas with Brittany at school. But she shouldn't think about that. She should be focused on fixing this as best she can. But she can't find her fucking car keys.

She runs down the stairs with her shoes in hand into the kitchen where her mother is sitting. "Where are my car keys?" She yelled too fast for anyone to understand her.

"Mija slow down. What are you looking for?"

"My keys. I need my damn car keys. Is anyone blocking me in?"

"Santana what's wrong? It's Christmas Eve, that's family time."

"I need to go get Brittany now." She's panicking now. She knows her keys are here somewhere.

"Stop. Right now Santana stop. What's wrong?" Santana takes a deep breath. She knows she needs to calm down and do this right or she could cause more problems for herself and Brittany.

"Brittany has this ex boyfriend. He's abusive in literally every way you can think of."

"That's true Mami. We saw him Friday night before Thanksgiving. He hit her, and said a lot of things to her that I don't want to repeat to you." Miguel cut in from somewhere behind her. Maribel's eyes widened.

"And now Brittany's mom is having him over for dinner tomorrow, she's trying to force them back together." Santana finishes.

"Why doesn't she just tell her mother?" Maribel would protect her children from anything, surely this woman would protect her child from someone that wanted to hurt her if she knew.

"She knows Mami. She knows about everything." Maribel clutches the shirt in front of her heart.

"Ok." Santana goes to look for her keys in another room. "Santana I don't-"  
"I'm going to get her Mami. If you don't want us to come back here I will take her to my apartment at school but I'm not leaving her in a place where she has nobody." Santana tries to keep her voice down but fails.

"Mija calm down. Of course Brittany can come here. I just don't want you driving so worked up."

"I'm ok. I promise. But I need to leave now. She needs me. I need to go." Miguel came back in and threw her a set of keys.

"Take my car sis. Tank is full. It's blocking yours in anyway."

"Thanks." She starts to throw her shoes on and turns to leave.

"Santana stop. Here." Santana turns back to her mother. "Take my credit card." Good thing because Santana had completely forgot about money. "I want you to keep the tank at least half full. Text me every hour to keep me updated. Ok?" Santana shakes her head. "Do I need to call the police and have them sent there Mija? You need to be honest with me. Because if something happens to her, neither of us will ever forgive ourselves if we could have done something more."

"No. I think she's ok. She's locked in her room and I told her not to come out until I get there. If I see anything at all, or hear anything from her, I promise I will call the police." Maribel nodded. She trusted Santana would do what was best for Brittany.  
"I do not want you to drive back tonight. Get her, and stop at a hotel. Ok? Make sure you stop and eat." She hugs Santana. "And keep her safe Mija. Ok? Text me as soon as you have her and let me know she's safe."

"Of course Mami. Of course I will." Santana hugged her. "Thank you." It felt like a big thank you. A thank you for always protecting her the best she could. A thank you for now helping Santana protect Brittany.

She was on her way out of the door when Miguel grabbed her arm. "Do you need me to come?"

"No. He's not there. And right now I think she needs me. I'll be ok, and if it's not, like I told Mami, I promise I will call the police." He nodded and let her go with a pat on the shoulder.

She goes out to her brothers car and jumped in. Adjusting the seat as quickly as she could. Her feet didn't even touch the pedals. She checked her phone and saw the address in a text and put it in the GPS. Six hours. It was almost 5:00. She texted Brittany what time she should be there and started driving. She tried to maintain the speed limit because the last the she needed was to have something further delay her arrival.

From Brittany: Thank you.

The very un-Brittany like response caused her to creep a little faster.

Santana keeps her word and stops as soon as the car hits half a tank and fills it back up. She texts her mother to let her know she's still fine and she got gas. She texts Brittany how far away she is, who just responds with "I love you". Which is better than "Thank you" but still not Brittany.

Brittany finishes packing, leaving just her coat out. It was a stupid coat. It wasn't even for winter. But it was the only one she had and her mom hadn't bought her a new one like she said she was going to before school. Why couldn't she buy her own coat? Why couldn't she be smart enough to go to school and work like a lot of other people did so that she could afford her own winter coat? Then she wouldn't have to wait for her mother to buy her one, which was clearly never going to happen. She doesn't want to be such a burden. But she's failed at that again as Santana is now driving six hours on Christmas Eve because she couldn't deal with her own family and her own problems. Stupid Brittany.

She waits till it sounds like nobody is upstairs or everyone has left to go to the bathroom and get her things from there and wipe her face off. When her mother hit her, her ring had also left a cut on her cheekbone. There was some bruising and she thought about covering it so Santana wouldn't worry but she wouldn't be able to hide it from her anyway. She grabbed her things and went back into her room and curled up on her bed.

At 10:30 Brittany got a text from Santana saying she was about an hour away. She knew that everyone in the house was gone at this point. So she got up and wrote a quick note on a piece of paper she found.

"I am leaving for the rest of break.  
Brittany"

She couldn't think of what else to say. She also didn't want to stay inside anymore so she took her bag, went out onto the porch, and sat down on the step. It was freezing outside so she curled into herself as much as possible. She wasn't sure if it was the cold, all of the crying, or the fact that she hadn't slept well in days, but she suddenly felt exhausted. So she put her head on her knees, leaned against the railing, and fell asleep.

Santana pulls up to the house the GPS says is Brittany's. It's much larger than her own. She is about to call Brittany and tell her that she's here when she sees a person sitting on a porch with a bag. She knew it was Brittany. She'd know her from any distance away. So she got out of her car, but when she closed the door Brittany didn't move. She walked up the shoveled path and realized that she was sleeping. But it was freezing out here, and she was shivering in her too thin coat. She crouched down in front of her and whispered her name. Getting steadily louder until Brittany startled awake.

Their eyes connected and Santana saw how red and swollen Brittany's were. And how tired she looked. Then she saw the cut on her cheek and the bruising and swelling. She frowned. "Baby" She whispered as she reached out to touch Brittany's cheek. When her fingers connected she could feel how ice-cold Brittany's skin was. "You're freezing Brittany." She stood up and gently pulled Brittany into a hug. She was stiff at first but, as though she had no control over the way her body reacts to Santana's, she melted into her.

Santana held her for a moment, needing to feel Brittany in her arms as much as Brittany needed to be there, before grabbing her bag and walking her back to her brother's car. She put her bag in the back seat and opened the passenger door for her, letting Brittany slide in. When she gets into the car she quickly takes Brittany's freezing, shaking hands tightly between hers rubbing gently to try and warm them. "Are you hurt Brittany, like need to go to a doctor hurt?" Brittany nods her head no.

"It's just a cut." She whispers. She sounds stilted and hollow and not at all how Brittany normally sounds. But God does it feel good to hear her voice. Santana quickly texts Maribel to tell her that she has Brittany, she's safe, and they're on their way to a hotel for the night. She turns the car on and starts to pull away. Brittany grabs her hand and pulls it onto her lap, playing with her fingers. Other than the movements of her hands against Santana's she is completely still and very quiet for the entire drive. Santana has to keep checking because she thinks Brittany has fallen asleep. They get about half an hour out of town and Santana finds a decent hotel to stay in. Brittany doesn't need to deal with some gross hotel for the night. She knows her mom would get it. So she pulls into something she can recognize to be pretty good and turns off the car. Brittany looks at her in confusion.

"My Mami made me promise that I wouldn't drive back tonight too. So we're staying here. Unless you don't want to. I can drive back tonight anyway." Brittany shook her head quickly. How stupid of her. She hadn't even thought about how hard driving all that way would be on Santana, of course they weren't driving back tonight. They got out of the car and Santana grabbed her bag again before they headed inside. Santana walked up and asked for a room, one bed, for one night. She handed the card over and when they offered to carry the bags up, she politely declined. She was feeling possessive and protective of Brittany right now and didn't really want any strangers crowding her.

She places her hand at the small of Brittany's back and guides her to the elevator, and then into the room. Santana moves past her to put her bag on the other side of the room, but looks back and sees Brittany standing there with her head down, playing with her fingers the way she does when she's nervous. "You're safe now." She says to her quietly. "I have you Brittany. You're safe and I love you so much." She stands in front of Brittany and starts to unbutton her coat. "Let's get you undressed and we'll go to bed ok?" Brittany nods and Santana takes of her coat, being as gentle as she can. She slides Brittany's shirt over her head and then gestures to her bra. Brittany nods so Santana unsnaps it and slides it down Brittany's bare arms. "I will take care of you." Santana whispers.

Brittany nods and reaches up to try and help Santana out of her clothes but her hands are shaking. The combination of having Santana here, being away from her home, and knowing it's going to be ok now is causing all of the stillness she managed to build up to melt away and now she's turning into a shaking crying mess. But she needed Santana, and now she's here. She doesn't know how else to react.

Santana helps Brittany remove the articles of clothing covering her torso. She looks up and her eyes meet Brittany's tear filled blue ones and Brittany just collapses in her arms. Santana holds Brittany tightly to her. This had been the reaction she was expecting. The one where she had to try and be strong even though the feeling of Brittany crying so hard tore heart apart. She wanted to cry, and kill whoever had done this, everyone who had ever aided in the moment. But she knew that this, right here, was what Brittany needed. Her to hold her tight.

After a few moments Brittany started to feel something other than sadness. It felt like need. It felt like needing Santana as physically and emotionally close to her as possible. Brittany leaned up and placed a teary kiss against Santana's lips. Gradually deepening it. She needed more. "I need you."

"Wha-"

"Please I need you closer. I need to feel you. Please Santana." Santana could see the desperation in Brittany's eyes. She didn't know what to do but give Brittany what she needed. She nodded and reached forward and slid Brittany's pants and underwear down. She kicked them off along with her shoes and socks as Santana pulled her own pants down and did the same. She pulled Brittany back into her body, feeling her naked skin pressed against her own. Brittany began kissing her again. There was want in that kiss. And need. And something else she hadn't felt before.

Santana gently laid her down on the bed and gestured for her to scoot back onto the pillows. She crawled up to Brittany and laid half on top of her, kissing her again, but slowing it down. If she was going to do it, she was going to do it as gently and as lovingly as she'd ever done anything.

It took her longer to get hard than usual, but ultimately she was and always would be powerless against Brittany's hands and lips and skin. Brittany reached between them and guided Santana to her center. Brittany wasn't as wet as Santana was used to, and she desperately didn't want to hurt her. So she went very slowly, prepared to stop at the first sign of discomfort.

Making love to Brittany this time was different than any time before. Usually Brittany was laid out, all long limbed and stretched beneath her. A leg, or an arm would usually be there, pressing them together, but nothing like this. Brittany was completely curled into her, as if she needed every part of her touching some part of Santana, as she continued to thrust gently inside of her. Santana kept whispering "I love you" into her ear, and she could feel Brittany mouthing it against her neck where her face was pressed. Santana could also feel the tears.

She was so torn between wanting to stop because what was this? What was she doing? Did Brittany need this or did she feel like she had to do this? Why was she crying? But she didn't stop. Because Brittany's little noises were similar to the ones she always made when she wanted Santana to keep going. And then hands running down her hair and neck were gentle but insistent like she wanted exactly what Santana was giving her. No more, no less. Despite her confusion about this moment, she could feel that she wasn't going to last much longer. But she wanted Brittany to cum. She thinks it might make her feel better, or maybe not but she never wants to leave Brittany unsatisfied. She loosens one of her arms that's holding Brittany tight to her body but Brittany stops her. "Don't let me go."

"I won't." And she tightened her hold but she felt Brittany's hand go between their bodies in the impossibly tight space between them and feels her start to rub her own clit. A few minutes later she feels Brittany stiffen beneath her, and cry out in a primal way that causes Santana's orgasm to follow quickly after Brittany's.

The orgasm did not make her feel better, in fact, it seemed to do the opposite. Sobs were now shaking her entire body against Santana's. She did the only thing she knew to do and pulled Brittany even closer, whispering "I love you." And "I've got you." And "You're safe with me now." Santana can feel her own tears running down her face now but she doesn't try to wipe them away. That would require her hands. And those were made for holding Brittany right now.

Santana just keeps whispering, and running her hands up and down Brittany's spine in a way that she knows soothes her. The sobs change to a sort of choked crying sound and Santana can make out the words "I don't deserve you" coming from Brittany's mouth over and over.

"You're everything to me. You're all I want. I want you forever. You're perfect. I love you." She whispers in response everytime Brittany cries that she doesn't deserve her. The cries calm to little gasping noises that come in tandem with the chest spasms Brittany is having from crying so hard for so long. "Tell me what happened baby. I need to help fix this. I can't if I don't know."

"M-my Mom told me that Tommy was coming over for dinner tomorrow. That I needed to be with him because she refused to take care of me forever. T-that I had been a burden for eighteen years. That I couldn't do any better. That I would become a s-stripper and nobody will ever want me. T-that he's a s-saint because he's w-willing to put up with me. That I'm stupid. Then she hit me." Brittany could feel Santana's grip on her tighten during the brief explanation. She knew Santana was crying too and she hated that she was the cause. But she was so glad to be in her arms.

Santana had wanted to stop Brittany several times during her story to give her a million reasons why none of those things were true. But she thought Brittany would feel better if she just let the poison out. "You are never a burden. First of all, I'd take care of you for the rest of our lives. But I know that I won't have to. Because you're brilliant, and an amazing dancer and you are going to do so well in your life. I am honored Brittany, every single day, that it might be me first row clapping for you. It might be me that gets to hug you first after a big show. I am so honored and I love you so much. You are so fucking important to me. And I will do whatever I need to make sure you feel that every day. And that you feel safe and loved."

"I love you too. I love you so much." Brittany replied. How do Santana's words do that? She felt like she could breathe again. Santana loved her. She didn't think she was a burden.

"I also need to say this. And, know that I will never tell you what you can and cannot do, but I don't want you seeing them anymore by yourself. I don't feel safe letting that happen. And they don't deserve to be in your presence anyway. I would appreciate it, that if you want to go see them again, you would let me come with you. Because I can't let you get hurt like this again, not knowingly. I wouldn't be able to forgive myself." Brittany nods sleepily. She didn't want Santana anywhere near them. But she knew Santana was right. "Now go to sleep love." Brittany nods against her again. Santana's fingers start working slow circles over her back, pushing lightly into muscle, soothing the tension she still had there, and working a magic to calm her enough to drift to sleep.

After Brittany's breaths evened out Santana used one hand to wipe the remaining tears from her eyes, before putting it back on Brittany. Santana was laying on her back with Brittany practically on top of her, her face so close Santana could feel Brittany's breath against her cheek. Brittany's weight and presence, as well as the knowledge that she would be ok let Santana drift off to sleep as well, arms still tightened protectively across Brittany's back.

Santana woke up in the morning with Brittany still lying on her chest, head still tucked protectively under her chin. She hadn't moved her arms all night. It's unusual that she wouldn't move at all, more unusual that Brittany wouldn't. The most unusual part however, was that she was awake while Brittany still slept. This almost never happened. But she knew Brittany had been tired, exhausted even. She had been through so much. Santana pushed the thought out of her mind as she ran her fingers through Brittany's long blonde hair trailing down onto her bare back.

When the phone rang it scared her. She had been lost in the feeling of Brittany's skin beneath her fingertips, memorizing the little bumps in her spine. The phone brought her quickly back to reality. She slid as carefully as she could out from under Brittany so she could jump out of bed and answer the hotel phone.

"Hello"

"Ma'am we were just checking that you were still in the room, you hadn't checked out and we were just making sure everything was ok."

"Fine. My girlfriend is just still asleep. She's not feeling well. I can get her up. I'm sorry."

"No, it's ok. It's Christmas. Just be out by five so the maids can clean the room before they leave for the night. Merry Christmas."

"Merry Christmas." She hung up the phone and looked over her shoulder, shocked that Brittany was still asleep. While she was up she grabbed her phone and went into the bathroom. She had several missed calls from her mother as well as increasingly panicked texts. She called and her mother picked up on the first ring.

"Mija are you two alright? I've been so worried."

"We're fine mami. Just a long night. Brittany is still asleep and I don't want to wake her yet. She needs the rest. So we'll leave here as soon as she wakes. I'm sorry you worried."

"It's fine Santana. Mother's worry. Text me when you two leave. Go on and get back to her. I love you."

"I love you too."

"Oh Santana! Merry Christmas."

"Merry Christmas mami." She hung up the phone and left the bathroom. Brittany was still asleep but she was stirring, not sleeping as deeply now that Santana had left. She quickly got in bed and pressed herself against Brittany as tightly as she could, wrapping her up and instantly calming her. She wonders if it's because even subconsciously Brittany feels unsafe. She wouldn't blame her. Santana could not stop the onslaught of thoughts about what had gone on last night. What if Brittany hadn't told Santana about Tommy? Or, more likely, what if Brittany's mom hadn't told her that Tommy was coming to dinner? What would he have done to her? Santana tightened her arms at the thought. She knows what he's capable. He has physically, emotionally, verbally, and sexually abused the love of her life. And her parents, those monsters, they just let it happen.

Santana could feel the burn of tears in her eyes. She kissed Brittany's head a few times trying to calm herself down. Brittany was the most amazing person she'd ever met. Santana sometimes can't even remember what it felt like to not have this fullness, this light in her chest. It was a whole new force, and it was Brittany. And someone had spent years hurting her. Years touching what wasn't his. Taking things that Brittany didn't want to give. She couldn't stop herself from crying. She made herself switch thoughts. She couldn't think about this anymore. It made her too mad and there was no solution.

Think about love. She told herself. They make each other so happy. Santana doesn't doubt for one minute that she makes Brittany happy. Think about the future. And how someday they'll live in a tiny apartment that is too cold in the winter but it won't matter because they can't exist in the same room and not be cuddling. It's nearly impossible and it feels unnatural every time. And nobody will ever hurt her, she thought as she ever so lightly traced the bruised area on Brittany's face.

She lay back down and kissed Brittany gently. She was so close their noses were nearly touching. She watched Brittany sleep, now peacefully, for what could have been minutes or hours. She lost track of time. But when Brittany did stir and wake, her eyelashes fluttered open revealing blue eyes. Santana couldn't help but smile because no matter what happened, Brittany was here with her, and she was safe.  
She could tell that Santana had been crying. Her eyelashes were still stuck together in clumps. Before she even opened her mouth she lifted her hand and ran her finger along the underside of Santana's eyes. Wiping away the remaining moisture.

"Why are you crying?" Her voice cracked, still not totally healed from crying last night and then long hours of sleeping. Santana shook her head. "Please."

"I am so sorry you got hurt again Britt. It kills me that there are people in this world that would hurt someone as amazing and perfect as you. Kills me." She watched Brittany's eyes drop from hers, to just slightly lower.

"I'm not worth all of that though. You shouldn't have to worry or be upset. I'm sorry I put you through this and made you drive so far."

"No. Don't do this Brittany please. Don't question your worth because of some terrible woman who doesn't know you like I know you, and definitely doesn't know me. You're worth everything to me. She doesn't get to make you feel otherwise. I will do anything and everything I need to do to remind you because you're worth it."

"But what if she's right. What if I'll never be anything but a burden? What if you get sick of me? I'm scared I'll lose you."

"I told you last night that you aren't a burden, and not that it ever will but if it did, I would take care of you every day. But I am so confident that won't even be an issue. You didn't see your performance, but I did. You have so much talent. Plus people just naturally want to be around you. Good, sane people anyway."

"I don't want you to have to take care of me."

"I want to take care of you. I want to know all the time that you are ok or that we're working to get you there. Most of the time you do just fine taking care of yourself, but why don't you just give yourself a break and let me do it sometimes, ok? I know that you will always take care of me too. What if someday you become a famous dancer, and I never went anywhere with my music career-"

"Not possible. You're amazing." Santana kissed her nose.

"Not the point. What if I didn't? What if you made all the money in the house? Would that be a problem?"

"Not as long as you were happy."

"Exactly. See Britt. We feel the same exact way. You could only ever be a burden to me if I thought of you that way. Which I never ever will. Otherwise you're just my beautiful girlfriend whom I love very much. Everything else is just detail ok?" Brittany nods and barely brushes her lips across Santana's. "How are you feeling?"

"My head hurts. And my cheek hurts. But I feel a little better than last night. Just really glad I'm back where I'm supposed to be." She buries herself into Santana's still naked chest. "I love you."

"I love you too. We should probably get going soon though. My mom is worried about you and I know she won't stop until she can inspect you herself."

"Ten more minutes?" Santana nods before starting up running her hands through Brittany's hair again. "Hold tighter." And Santana does. She always will.

The drive back was quit. Santana plugged her iPhone into the radio system. She wasn't sure why she was avoiding Christmas music. Some part of her felt like maybe it would make Brittany sad. They stopped for food but Brittany barely ate anything. Santana was concerned, but knew Brittany's lack of appetite would last about as long as it would take to get her home. Her mami would feed Brittany till she burst. When Maribel is concerned, she cooks. That's just how she is.

"Do you hate Christmas music?" Brittany asks after Santana quickly skips over another Christmas song. Brittany wouldn't mind listening to some Christmas music. She's never loved the holiday but the music and the decorations are kind of the best parts.

"I just thought maybe you wouldn't want to since you're not with your family. Plus today and yesterday are kind of a mess."

"But today I'm with you." Brittany knows there is a lot going on. She knows what happened last night. She's not trying to ignore it. But she's out of her house. She's with Santana. She's safe. It's conflicting actually. Part of her wants to be happy because she gets more time with Santana but like every time before it she's sad that things happened the way they did at her house. She is kind of angry for not expecting it

"You're right B. Do you like Christmas?" Santana brushes her thumbs across Brittany's knuckles.

"I liked decorating for Christmas this year. And I like looking at the lights. And I like the music. I am excited about your gift I hope you like it."

"I'll love it. I'm excited to give you your gift too. I think my mami got you one too."

"Santana! My bus ticket was supposed to be my gift. I don't have one for her, or your brothers or dad!"

"No worries Britt. It's a rule in our house. Kids don't buy parents Christmas gifts. We just have to come home. That's our gift. It's lame but it's how it's always been. That's how it is with my grandparents too."

"Is your mom going to be upset that I am there for Christmas? I don't want to mess up your family's holiday. I didn't think about that. I don't want to be a bother San I've already messed up by making you leave on Christmas Eve." Santana took her eyes off of the road for a second to look over at Brittany who was becoming rapidly more upset.

"Brittany stop, please don't worry about that. My mom is so worried about you. She wants you back at the house as bad as I do. And you haven't messed anything up. Let's just look at it as I got to spend Christmas Eve with my girlfriend who is just as much family as anyone to me. Ok? And now we're going to spend Christmas and the rest of break with my family. Everything is ok. Everyone wants you home with us."

"Does everyone know?" Santana is nervous to tell Brittany how much she had to tell her mom. She knows Brittany will understand but she also can't help but think that those weren't her secrets to trust someone else with.

"No I don't think so. My mami made me explain to her why I was leaving. I told her that your ex boyfriend was abusive, and that your mother knew that and was still trying to have him over and force you two back together. Miguel was there as well and confirmed that he saw him hit you. Mami gave me her credit card and told me to leave and to let her know when I had you safe. I'm sorry I had to tell her anything at all I just didn't want to leave against her will and then have her be mad at both of us when we got back."

"No. It's ok. I understand." She did understand. But some small part of her was afraid that Maribel knowing about her mother was going to somehow make her see whatever it is that was fundamentally wrong with Brittany in her own mother's eyes. She knew that was stupid. That this was her being stupid. But she couldn't stop the thoughts. Santana just pulled her hand to her lips, kissing it before she let go to change her iPhone to play some Christmas music.

It was dark but not very late when they got back to Santana's house. She almost wished it were later because her extended family is probably still there and she doesn't think Brittany is in a place to deal with that right now. Really nobody is ever in a place to deal with all of Santana's extended family at once. "So. Family might still be there. We don't have to hang out with them though if you're uncomfortable or nervous. We can just go upstairs. No one will mind. Ok?" Brittany nodded but her hand tightened around Santana's.

"Play it by ear?"

"Sounds good." Santana grabbed Brittany's bag out of the back seat and set it down on the sidewalk.

"Hug please?" Santana nodded and opened her arms. Brittany stepped in and rested her head on her shoulder. Santana reached into Brittany's open coat and wrapped her arms around Brittany's warm body. She held her tight for a bit, letting Brittany decide when she was ok to go inside. When Brittany pulled apart Santana grabbed her bag, and reconnected their hands and walked towards the front door.

When they opened it Santana was surprised by the quiet. All that was heard was the T.V. in the living room. Then "Mija?" her mom called out.

"Yeah Mami." Santana answered. She was thankful that everyone had gone. Her mom would make them eat leftovers and they could go to bed early. Her mom rushed into the hall where they were and pulled Brittany into a hug. She watched the tension melt away in both of them a little. Then she let go and pulled Santana into a hug that was just a little tighter than she was used to. But that's ok, she understands. After she let go of Santana she turned back to Brittany. And put her hands gently on either side of Brittany's face inspecting the cut, bruise, and swelling.

"Let's get something on that." Santana knew that treating the cut now wasn't going to help very much but she also knew that her mother was the kind of person that needed to fix things. She couldn't fix what really hurt Brittany, so she'd just try to fix the outside. After the first aid kit was put away again and Brittany's cut was freshly cleaned and had a layer of Neosporin on it Santana finally took a second to look around. There was still whole food on the counter, not left overs. It looked like nobody had been here at all.

Her mother walked over to the oven and opened it and Santana saw a whole turkey. Santana whispered to her mother so Brittany wouldn't hear, "Mami, didn't anybody come for Christmas?"

"I called last night and told them not too. I thought it might be better for Brittany if it was just the family." Santana couldn't stop from hugging her mother. "Go take Brittany into the living room. I'll call you all when dinner is ready. I just need to heat some things up." And then louder. "I hope you're hungry Brittany. You look thinner than the last time I saw you." There it is. Santana knew it was coming.

"We didn't miss dinner?" If they didn't miss dinner that made Brittany feel like she ruined their Christmas a little less. Santana took Brittany's hand and led the way to the living room. When she got in she could tell that her brothers and dad had been waiting for them to come in. Antonio stood up first and pulled them both into a hug.  
"Merry Christmas! We're glad you're here Brittany." He said sincerely. Her brothers stood up and gave them hugs. Santana watched Brittany carefully as her brother's hugged her. She wasn't sure that Brittany would notice, in fact she hoped she didn't, but they were being gentler with her than usual. They didn't ask any questions, they just all sat down and continued watching the movie. Brittany immediately curled into her body and Santana just opened her arms and let her curl closer.

When dinner was ready they all sat down to eat. Maribel kept adding things to Brittany's plate when she thought she wasn't looking. Brittany noticed. She didn't think she lost weight, but maybe she had. It wasn't on purpose if she did. Or maybe this was just how Santana's mom took care of people. Brittany was thankful either way that she was someone Maribel wanted to take care of.

After dinner Brittany followed Santana back into the living room where they all sat around while Antonio and Maribel put little piles of packages in front of them. She was excited to watch them open their gifts. Maybe after she and Santana could go upstairs and give each other their gifts. But then Antonio set a pile down in front of her as well. She looked around confused but nobody seemed to be calling attention to the fact that she had a pile too. Just like all of them. Like she's silly to be surprised by this. She knew that she might get a gift from Maribel but this was more than she'd ever gotten. She got the kind of gifts from her parents that showed off their wealth. It was about them, not about her. But this was just some gifts from her girlfriend's parents. She wanted to cry. She was confused and happy and surprised. Santana squeezed her hand like she knew what was going on in Brittany's head.

"This year we go oldest to youngest. We aren't opening gifts from each other this year because we're going on a vacation as a Christmas gift for ourselves. So Luis you start." Brittany wondered if this was how they'd always done Christmas. She liked it. It made you appreciate what other people received because it's not all about you. After Luis went Gabe, and then Miguel who is apparently three minutes older than Diego. They all received similar gifts. New shoes, video games, movies, a set of pajamas each, Gabe got a new tie that he seemed pretty excited about, and Luis received Tupperware so he would stop taking Maribel's home with him.

Next came Santana which meant Brittany had to let go of her hand which she wasn't very fond of. She too got new pajamas, and a new guitar case and tuner. A new set of sheets (which just so happened to be a color that Brittany had suggested she thought would look pretty in her room a few months ago) a pair of Ray Bans, and some new boots. Maribel then handed her an envelope. "This is for both of you." The front of the envelope said "To: Our girls" on it. Brittany didn't care what was in it. The envelope meant enough. But Santana opened it and pulled out a certificate to get their hair done at a salon Maribel likes. Brittany kept the envelope.

"Ok Britt Britt. You're turn." Santana said as she nudged Brittany gently. She leaned down and picked up the first box before unwrapping it carefully. She opened the box and pulled out a brand new wool coat. It was beautiful and looked very warm.

"Thank you! I needed a new coat really bad."

"I remember. You were wearing some sad excuse for a coat last time you were here decorating outside. Now you have a warm one. Use it. I don't want you getting sick." Brittany nodded before folding it gently and setting it back on top of the box before opening the next gift. It was a matching mitten and scarf set that went with her coat. She also got a pajama set just like everyone else, a basket with some lotions and candles, and a stack of movies that were very different from the horror/action ones that everyone else got. Hers had Finding Nemo and Monsters Inc as well as a couple chick flicks.

"So you have movies to watch here too since we have a rather limited selection." Antonio told Brittany. "I picked the next one. I know you're going to like it."

"He's very proud of himself dear so even if you don't just pretend." Maribel stage whispered. Brittany smiled and opened the next package and pulled out black rain boots with little ducks printed all over them. They were amazing.

"I love them!"

"And they have liners in them so you can wear them in the winter. Multi-seasonal. It's the latest trend." Antonio gestured proudly to the boots. They were wonderful. And it was more wonderful that he had picked them for her. She swallowed the sad thought that he already knew her so much better than her own father. And she's spent exactly one week in his house. They all hugged Maribel and Antonio before settling on the couch to watch one of Brittany's new movies. The Grinch.

Brittany dozes off several times during the movie, and jerks back awake trying to pretend she hadn't fallen asleep. Each time Santana suggests that it would be ok if she were to fall asleep but Brittany shakes her head and forces herself to stay awake. When the movie is over Santana announces that she's tired and that they were going to head to bed. They wished everyone a Merry Christmas again and headed up to her bedroom.

"Want to get ready for bed?" Santana suggests half jokingly. She knows Brittany wants to exchange gifts.

"But what about Christmas gifts? Can we do that first?"

"I was kidding baby. Of course." Santana went to her desk and pulled out a small wrapped box. She turned back towards Brittany who was pulling two square wrapped packages with a piece of paper taped to the top of one. Santana walked over and held hers out and exchanged it for the wrapped gifts in Brittany's hand.

"Will you open first?" Brittany asked. Santana nodded and looked at the top one. The little piece of paper taped to the top just had a date, a time, and the words fifteen minutes.

"What's this?"

"Just the first part of your gift. I got you booked at the coffee shop the first Wednesday after we get back. It's a fifteen-minute set. I did it because I could tell you wanted to, and I believe in you and I think other people should get to hear you sing too. Because it's beautiful." Santana didn't know what to say so she leaned forward and kissed Brittany. After a few seconds Brittany pulled away. "Ok next."

Santana ripped the paper on the slightly smaller gift and revealed a beautiful frame with a picture of her and Brittany that she had never seen. It was beautiful. Both the frame and the picture. She had just been thinking that she wanted to get one or two printed for her room. "It's perfect B. I love it. The frame is beautiful." Brittany looked down and smiled.

"I thought you'd like it. Quinn took the picture. I made her not show you. Ok next one!" Santana set the picture carefully down on her bed before opening the next one. It was a leather bound journal, the top was simply but beautifully engraved. "Look at the back." Santana read the inscription on the back complete with the little S + B underneath.

"What is that from?"

"Pablo Neruda. He's a poet. Do you like it?" Santana bent her head down to wipe a tear that was threatening to escape her eye. It was beautiful. But her silence made Brittany nervous. "I thought it would be good because you always have little notes in your pocket. Plus you can reuse it you just need to change out the notebook inside." She started to wring her hands. Santana set the notebook down and took Brittany's hands into hers and pulled Brittany closer to her.

"I love it. All of it. It's nearly as beautiful and perfect as you." She smiled before kissing Brittany. "Ok. You're turn." Brittany picked the little box back up and unwrapped it before opening it. She gasped.

"Santana this is amazing. It's so pretty." She pulled the delicate bracelet out of the box with its little charms that tinkled lightly when they hit each other. She examined the little heart and the S. She looked back up at Santana, eyes shining with happy tears.

"Can I put it on you?" Santana asked. Brittany handed her the bracelet. Santana took it and undid the clasp before securing it around Brittany's wrist, leaning down to kiss the spot on her wrist where she could see Brittany's pulse. "I love you."

"I love you too. Thank you for saving me."

"I will always protect you Brittany." They hugged each other for a long moment before pulling apart and making the decision to get ready to go to bed.

The next morning when they woke up things were even more back to normal. At least in the sense that Brittany was awake first. She was still lying draped across her but she was laughing at something she was reading on Santana's phone. "What's funny?" She croaked.

"I downloaded this app that has funny videos on it. Sorry if I woke you." She kissed Santana. She wasn't really sorry. She wanted Santana awake. "Can we go to Times Square for New Years? I've always wanted to do that. Maybe Quinn could come?"

Santana hadn't really put much thought into what they would do for New Years. But if Brittany wanted to go into the city that would work for her. She sent a text to Quinn to let her know that something had come up and Brittany was at her house early. And that they were going to Times Square for New Years Eve. No arguments.  
Later that day Santana told her brothers that they were thinking about going into the city. Diego and Miguel were both predictably working but Luis and Gabe said that they would join them even though Santana hadn't invited them. Gabe said they could all stay at his place if they wanted after so they didn't have to commute home. Maribel seemed weary, as she always does when Santana and Quinn go into the city at night. She pulled Luis aside when the others weren't paying attention.

"You take care of them. Don't let any drunk people get too close to them or anything."

"Mami don't worry. Gabe and I will watch them and Miguel and Diego will be there in uniform."

"I just worry." Luis nodded. He knew. He and his mother were close, so he knew a lot about her worries.

On New Years Eve Quinn came over and they all got ready together before heading into the city to meet up with Luis and Gabe for dinner. The city was more crowded than the last time that Brittany had been here with Santana. She stuck close to Santana, holding her hand tightly.

They ate dinner at an Italian restaurant that Gabe apparently knew the owner of because plates that they didn't order just kept coming as well as a friendly older gentleman that gave them all a glass of what Quinn told them was very expensive champagne. Brittany liked it but it made her sneeze. Everything was amazing and they left the restaurant happy and full.

They got to Times Square around 10:30pm and Brittany couldn't believe the amount of people that were there. They'd be lucky if they could see anything. "Maybe we should have gotten here earlier?" She suggested.

"Maybe. If your brothers aren't cops and can't get you a good spot no matter what time you come." Luis answered her. Santana smiled and pulled her hand to lead them in the direction that she knew Miguel and Diego would be. Brittany was glad for Luis and Gabe's size when they got closer to the crowds. As long as Quinn, Brittany, and Santana stayed close they barely had to deal with bumping into anyone. People just kind of stepped out of the way for them.

They got to a barrier that Diego was standing in front of and Luis called his name. "Hey guys! Ladies!" He pulled the barrier open enough to let them slip through. "Just find a place to stand back there." He gestured to an area with a few other people, some of whom had kids. Brittany couldn't imagine bringing a baby to this. But maybe if Diego was still working this event years from now, and could get them in this much less crowded space, it wouldn't be so bad for her and Santana to bring their own children. She looped her arm around Santana's and pressed her cold nose into Santana's shoulder. Her nose might be cold but the rest of her wasn't. This coat was amazing.

They spent the next hour and a half watching music acts. It took Brittany about seven minutes to make friends with some of the older women and children that were standing with them. Santana's heart nearly exploded when Quinn distracted her from a conversation she was having with her brother and pointed at Brittany who was dancing with a little girl to a song that was playing. "Sap." Quinn said as she hip checked Santana lightly.

"Q I can't help it. I don't know what's wrong with me but like I want to do adult things with Brittany." Quinn raised an eyebrow at her in mock judgment. "Not like that. Like, have kids. Live together. Go grocery shopping." Quinn laughed.

"Of course you do. I've known you our whole lives S. It doesn't take a genius or even someone that's known you that long to see that you guys are forever. It's glaringly obvious actually." Santana smiled at her and looked back over at Brittany. "You get those kinds of feelings when you find your forever." Santana nodded, still watching Brittany who was now dancing with that little girl, and an even smaller little boy who was mostly just bouncing. Yeah. That's her forever.

She couldn't help herself a few moments later when she walked over to join Brittany. She just needed to be closer to her. Brittany introduced her to her new friends Bradley and Kayla.

At just a few minutes until midnight they all huddled together, Santana's arms protectively around her girlfriend. Not that they were in any real danger here, but people were starting to pack a little closer. The countdown started and Brittany's excitement was contagious. At midnight they watched the ball fall while jumping and cheering. Before the minute was up Brittany put her mittened hands on either side of Santana's cheeks and pulled her into a kiss. Santana deepened the kiss until she felt someone smack her in the back of the head lightly. She pulled away from Brittany to Quinn shaking her head at them. "There are children you two."

Santana continued to hold Brittany for the rest of the time they spent there, which wasn't actually that long. After half an hour of celebrating the New Year, the party started to calm down and Brittany put her head on Santana's shoulder. "Sleepy?"  
Brittany nodded and Santana tightened her hold. Eventually Gabe asked if they were ready to go, to which they all nodded and they headed back into the crowds. "How far?" Brittany asked Santana.

"Just to the subway. It's a couple stops and then he lives right off of one of the stops."

"Don't lose me ok?" Santana tightened her hold on Brittany's hand and they followed Luis and Gabe to the subway station. They said their goodbyes to Luis who was going to head in a different direction. The station was packed and so was the train. It was full of drunken people who were loud and pushy but Gabe stood in front of them and they remained relatively unbothered except for some guy who was clearly checking one of them out. One glare from Gabe though, and he didn't look their way again.

When they got back to Gabe's apartment they were nearly dead on their feet. "I'm going to bed sis. You know where everything is." She nodded and went to the closet and pulled out some of her sweatpants and t-shirts that she kept at his house.  
"I'll take the smaller couch." Quinn yawned, grabbing a blanket and pillow from the same closet. She'd clearly been here before Brittany decided.

"Do you want to sleep on the couch and I can sleep on the floor right next to you?" Brittany shook her head no. She wouldn't be able to sleep next to Santana and not cuddle with her. She'd been even more cuddly than usual since she'd left her parents house.

"I will sleep on the floor with you. Or we could both fit on the couch. I don't want to not cuddle." Santana understood. She wasn't fond of the idea either. She'd noticed Brittany's increased need for closeness and matched it with her heightened need to make Brittany feel safe. "You get on first and then I will fit myself on too."

Santana arranged the pillow they'd share and got onto the couch and took up as little space as she could while holding the blanket up for Brittany to get under. She did and their bodies fit together, facing each other, with Santana's arm wrapped around Brittany. "I had fun today." Brittany mumbled sleepily into Santana's chest.

"I'm glad. I did too." Brittany mumbled something in response that Santana couldn't understand. So she kissed the top of Brittany's head and whispered, "I love you." She heard another mumble in response before she felt Brittany's breathing even out. She spent the last few minutes until she fell asleep thinking about Brittany's birthday in a few days and how she was determined to make it amazing for her. Because Brittany deserved amazing. Always.


	17. Chapter 17

**AN:** Enjoy. My beta is awesome. I'm exhausted.

Let me know what you think please. And what you want. And what you like. Just tell me things. I like when you do that.

* * *

Brittany was anxious to know what they were going to do for her birthday. Not anxious, excited. Any time she brought it up Santana just said "you'll see".

"But it's not a lot of money right? Cause I still think you spent too much on me for Christmas."

"Want me to take it back?" Santana joked.

"No! I love it!" She wrapped her hand possessively around her bracelet. She did love it. It was beautiful and she liked that she had something to wear that would remind her of Santana anytime she wasn't near. She'd need to get Santana something like that.

When Brittany woke up the next morning she wasn't surprised that Santana was asleep. But she really wanted her awake. Like now. It's her birthday, she should be allowed to wake Santana up. So she starts kissing Santana's cheek and poking her sides gently. "Sssssannn wake up!" She saw the corners of Santana's mouth turn up but she was still pretending to be asleep. "Guess me having my shirt off is a totally wasted view then." Brittany sighed. Santana's eyes popped open and her head twisted to where Brittany was laying. Brittany wasn't topless, but she was laughing. "So that's how to get you up."

"Not fair." Santana whined. But she was still smiling. She wrapped her arms around Brittany and flipped her over so she was laying flat and Santana was now straddling her. "Happy Birthday baby." She leaned down and kissed her gently before rolling off of her and reaching into a bedside table and pulling out another small jewelry box and hands it to Brittany.

Brittany opens the box and finds another little charm, ballet shoes, and a key. She looks up at Santana. "I love it. But what's the key for?" Santana had sleepily wrapped herself back around Brittany and was lazily laying kisses to any skin she could reach.

"My apartment."

"Your apartment?"

"Mhmm. So you can come over whenever you want and you don't have to worry about people being there. Quinn is totally ok with it, before you ask."

Brittany looked from the key back to Santana. She reached over Santana and set the little box down on the table. She pushed Santana's shoulder so she was flat on her back before straddling her and leaning down and kissing her hard. When she finally pulled away she was breathless and her chest was heaving. "What was that for?"

"I just love you Santana. So much. I am so lucky." She leaned back down and kissed Santana again. Slower, but still deeply. She felt want burning deep in her belly. Without breaking her kiss she reached her hands up and grabbed the hem of her shirt. She separated from Santana only to pull her shirt over her head. Santana looked up and nearly acted upon the desire she felt before realizing that her parents were very much still at home.

Her hesitation was easily read by Brittany who was having a hard time caring that anyone was home. She felt so much love and now she wanted to show Santana how much love she felt. She grabbed Santana's hands that were now resting on her thighs and placed them on her now naked chest and ground her hips down slightly onto Santana's.

"B-Britt we, I can't. We have to stop." Brittany pouted.

"Why? I need you." She whined.

"My mom doesn't have work today. And if she catches us she will make us sleep in different rooms." Santana answered with her eyes closed trying desperately hard to calm herself down. That sounded like a good enough reason to stop. She didn't want to make anybody mad. And more than anything she didn't want to have to sleep in a separate room than Santana.

"Ok. I'm sorry." She laid down on top of Santana still pouting. Santana tickled her fingers up and down Brittany's back.

"It's ok baby. I want you too. So bad. Soon I hope." They took a little while to lay there and calm their bodies and just soak each other in. After a half an hour or so Santana spoke up again. "We should maybe head downstairs soon or my mom is going to start knocking to wake us up. She is big on birthday breakfasts." She felt Brittany nod against her neck, and then lips kiss just below her ear before Brittany sat back up and smiled at Santana.

They got dressed and went downstairs where they could already smell bacon and something sweet. As soon as they got into the kitchen Maribel broke out into a round of Happy Birthday while making Brittany sat down. She went to the oven and loaded up a plate full of bacon, eggs, and French Toast. "What do you want on your French Toast? You can have anything birthday girl. Whipped cream, syrup, fruit… your wish is my command." Santana already knew what Brittany would pick.

"Strawberries and whipped cream?" Yep. She called it. Maribel set to work dressing Brittany's French toast. Santana fixed her own with just syrup.

"Ok. So" She started as she set Brittany's plate in front of her. "Antonio and I did do something for you for your birthday but you won't know what it is until later. Ok?"

"But you've already-"

"Nonsense. It's your birthday. I just wanted to make sure you knew it was coming." She kissed the top of Brittany's head, before kissing the top of Santana's. "Morning Mija." And getting her own breakfast to sit down with the girls and eat.

Halfway through breakfast Diego and Miguel showed up and wished Brittany a happy birthday. After breakfast was cleaned up Maribel asked Brittany "So what would you like to do today Brittany?" Brittany looked toward Santana.

"I don't know because I don't know what Santana has planned."

"We don't need to get ready until four. So that gives us time."

"Maybe we could play a board game?" Maribel clapped her hands and lead Brittany to the closet where the board games were kept.

"You choose dear. We'll happily play anything you like." Brittany looked through the games.

"I haven't played any of these I don't think."

"Oh that can't be true. Look here's Monopoly. Everybody has played that." Brittany shook her head sadly. "Your family didn't play Monopoly?"

"My mom, aunt, sister, and cousin played a few times but I wasn't allowed."

"Too young?" Maribel asked. Santana cringed. She could tell by Brittany's tone that this wasn't a happy memory for her. She wondered if she had happy memories from her childhood at all.  
"My mom said I wasn't smart enough. It wasn't that long ago so I don't think I was too young." Maribel's eyes widened and Santana could see her jaw clench. A trait that was an easy tell that her mother, brothers, or she herself were angry.

"Well I doubt very much that is true. Would you like to play?" Brittany nodded yes and Maribel brought the game to the table. Diego and Miguel set up and started to explain the basic rules to Brittany while Maribel went to the kitchen to get drinks. Santana thought she was taking a little too long so she went in to see if she needed help. Her mother was standing with her hands against the counter and her head bent towards her chest.

"Mami?"

"Santana you scared me. I'm sorry I got distracted." She went about getting cups and setting them on the counter.

"Are you ok?"

Maribel stopped moving around the kitchen for a moment and looked at her youngest child. "How could a family treat her like that. Was there anything good at all? Was there anyone in that family that treated that sweet, wonderful, loving girl the way she should have been treated?" Santana could see her mother's eyes getting damp. She shook her head.

"I don't know Mami. I don't know how to ask those questions." Maribel hugged her daughter.

"You better treat her like a princess Santana." She faked a stern voice. She saw the way Santana treated Brittany. She didn't even know that there was room for improvement.

"Always. Let me help you carry the cups." Maribel patted Santana's cheek before picking up the other cups and heading back to the dining room table.

An hour and a half in and it's safe to say Brittany was in fact no where near too stupid to learn this game as she was currently lording over most of the property and money. She had earned most of it fair and square. There were a few favors towards the beginning till she got the hang of it, but after that Brittany had conquered the board on her own. After everyone had gone bankrupt except Brittany, and she was declared the winner, they went into the living room and watched TV.

At four Santana said they should probably start getting ready. Maribel told Brittany that she could use their bathroom so they could get ready at the same time. Brittany thanked her and they went upstairs. "San what should I wear?" Santana went into her closet to look at Brittany's things that she had hung in there. She reached in and pulled out the dress that Rachel and her dad's had given her.

"This. With these shoes." She handed Brittany the dress and shoes she had chosen. Brittany grabbed her makeup bag and everything else she would need to get ready and went into the master bath. As soon as she heard the door close Santana locked her own door. She grabbed a box of stuff out of the closet. She saw the basket of scented candles and lotion that Brittany had got for Christmas and grabbed that out too. She went about setting up the room as quickly as she could so she still had enough time to get ready. When she was nearly done and about to get into the shower she heard a knock at the door. "Uh. Hello?" She awkwardly answered hoping it wasn't Brittany.

"It's me open up." She heard her mother hiss through the door.

She opened the door a crack and squeezed out. "Oh don't want me to see your sex set up?"

"MAMI!" Santana gasped.

"Oh like I don't know why you asked for us to be miraculously out of the house tonight. I wasn't born yesterday Santana. You be safe and so help me God if you get that girl pregnant before you're married-"

"Mom. We're safe. Oh my God." Maribel laughed at her flustered daughter. It was too easy.

"Here's the credit card. Dinner, dessert, souvenirs if she wants them. Ok? The reservations are already in place so you just need to show up. Papi set it up for you." She handed Santana her credit card. "Remember. Tell her dinner is from us. Ok Casanova? Make sure she knows you had some help. Si?"

"Yes yes. Now let me go I need to get ready. And, thanks Mami. For helping me make tonight special." Maribel kissed her cheek before nodding and heading down the stairs. Santana went back into her room and got into the shower. As soon as she got in the shower she started thinking about Brittany. About how much Brittany had wanted her this morning. And about her plans for the evening. Thoughts, coupled with the fact that it had been a while since she'd last cum got her hard quickly. She considered for a moment turning on the cold water and forcing it away. But that was just postponing the inevitable. And the last thing she wanted was to cum too early tonight. So she grasped herself firmly and closed her eyes, picturing the last time they had sex in her room. Her on the chair, Brittany riding her. And it was all over soon.

When she got out she blow dried her hair at warp speed trying to make up for the time lost in the shower. She did her makeup and finished her hair before getting dressed. She pulled out her tightest compression shorts because this dress will show any hint of anything, before putting the rest of her clothes on. She grabbed her heels, coat, made sure she had her wallet, her mom's card, and the tickets before heading downstairs.

When she got downstairs she saw Brittany standing there talking to her mom and her breath caught. She was hit with a feeling that she was no stranger to. Luck. How did she get so lucky to have this beautiful person love her? She shook her head and made her way to the bottom of the stairs.

Brittany heard the clicking of heels walking down the stairs and turned to look at Santana. She was beautiful. And sexy. Both in equal measure and Brittany didn't know if she wanted to take her out and shower off to the entire world so that they all knew she was hers, or take her back upstairs and finish what they had started this morning. The dress was about as short and tight as could be allowed while still being very classy. Brittany knew she was staring. Probably drooling. But could you blame her? No.  
Santana walked towards her and lifted her hand for Brittany to take. "You look absolutely beautiful Britt." She kissed her hand.  
"No. You look- I don't even have words. Beautiful. Amazing."

"You both look beautiful now stand together I want to take pictures."

Santana snapped her head towards her mom. That hadn't been agreed on. But before she could open her mouth to argue about it being embarrassing or them not having time Brittany hugged her. "I'm glad your mom is taking pictures. We need more. And you look so pretty." They posed for a few minutes before Santana decided they really did have to leave or they would be late.

When they got outside she opened Brittany's door for her before going to the driver's side and climbing in. After they had been on the road for a few minutes Brittany turned to her. "Now can I know where we are going?"

"Mmmm I guess you can know the first part. Dinner." She smiled, but kept her eyes on the road.

"Where?"

"Just a place. Relax B. You're going to love everything tonight. I hope anyway."

"I bet I will." She made herself stop asking questions. She wanted to know but she loved that Santana had planned all of this for her. So she played with the radio till she found a song they both liked, and waited to drive into the city so she could see all of the buildings and lights.

When they pulled to a stop Brittany looked around for a name or a sign. She didn't immediately find anything. Santana got out of the car. By time Brittany had the thought that Santana had left the keys, her door was being opened and a hand she would know anywhere was being offered to her. She took it and got out of the car. "San the car is still running."

"I know babe. The valet is going to take it." She kissed her hand. "And not scratch it." She said in a threatening way in the valet's direction. Santana led her through the doors and into a very fancy lobby. She finally saw a sign that had a name.

"Le Cirque?" She questioned. She had, unsurprisingly, never heard of it.

"Yep. My dad likes it here, and he knows the chef. Golfing friends or something." Santana walked up to a podium with a man in a tuxedo standing at it. "Two under Lopez please."

"This way ma'am." The man replied. He took them to their table and told them their waiter would be right with them. The waiter showed up a few minutes later, handing them menus and making suggestions. Brittany understood about every third word the waiter said. But Santana nodded politely at him and he left. They opened the menu and the first thing Brittany saw were the prices.

"Santana! It's so expensive." She worried her lip between her teeth.

"It's not that terrible. Plus my parents are paying. It's their birthday gift to you. They made me promise to make sure you got dessert." She could see Brittany's eyes still shifting between the menu and her. "Please don't think about money or anything. Just get anything you want. You could ask the waiter for the most expensive thing and it would be fine. I just want you to have a good time, it's your birthday. You should have fun. If you don't like it here, we could go somewhere else." Brittany shook her head.

"No. This is perfect." She looked back down at the menu, but another problem arose. She looked back up at Santana who was reading her own menu. "San. I don't know what any of this stuff is. Can you order for me?" Santana nodded. She had been here a few times so she knew a few things that she liked. But beyond that, she loved the idea that Brittany trusted her enough to know what she liked. When the waiter came back Santana ordered for both herself and Brittany. "This is the nicest place I've ever been in my life."

"Get used to it. I don't know if you've noticed but my family likes food. Really good food. I like getting fancy and going out every once in awhile, but not all the time. When we aren't around my parents go out to eat like three times a week to places like this. That's a lot of effort." Brittany nodded her agreement. When the food came back it was placed in front of them and it smelled amazing even though Brittany had no idea what it was.

"And the chef asked me to tell you that he sends his regards to your father. He hopes you enjoy." The waiter walked away as Brittany and Santana began eating.

"Ok, I got you the chicken. It's got a fancy name but that's basically what it is. Chicken and vegetables." Brittany took a bite and she couldn't deny that it was delicious.

"It's so good. What did you get?"

"Salmon. Want to try?" Brittany nodded. Before she could use her fork to get a bite, Santana was holding out her fork for Brittany to try. "Careful it's hot." Brittany took the bite and couldn't stop the small noise that escaped her lips.

"That's amazing too." Santana was glad Brittany liked both. She had been worried she wouldn't like either.

"Here, we'll share." She took part of her salmon and squash and transferred it to Brittany's plate, who was cutting a piece of chicken off to trade. After they ate nearly all of their food, they ordered dessert (because Brittany wasn't about to let Santana break a promise) to share. After they finished the waiter brought their check (which Brittany never saw) and Santana handed over her card. When they went to leave Santana helped Brittany put her coat back on before taking her hand and walking out of the restaurant.

While they were waiting for the valet to bring Santana's car back Brittany's reserve broke. She had to ask. "So are we going home now or…"

"You're not subtle. But thank you for not trying to figure it out. You'll know as soon as we get there what our next stop is. Ok?"  
The drive to the next destination was short. Santana left the car with another valet just far enough away that Brittany still wasn't sure what they were doing. She knew they were near Times Square, but not where they were right now. As they got closer Santana fought to hold her smile in, waiting for Brittany to figure it out. Finally she heard a gasp. "San! Are we going to see Wicked?!" Santana nodded and Brittany practically tackled her trying to hug her.

"I am so excited! I've listened to the music and Rachel told me so much about it and I wanted to see it so bad!" Santana nodded.  
"I know. Happy Birthday. Now let's get inside, it's cold." Once their tickets were scanned and they were inside the lobby, they took their coats to coat check. They were still a little early to be getting seated so they stood off in a corner enjoying some pseudo-alone moments. As soon as they announced that the doors were opened Santana led Brittany to the door so they could get to their seats.

Brittany kept expecting Santana to turn down a row any second but they kept moving forward. Finally when they were about six rows back she turned in and they took the two seats that were almost dead center. "These seats are amazing."

"Only the best for you." Santana took Brittany's hand over the arm rest. "Gabe know some people that he trades sports tickets for show tickets. I asked him to get me the best he could for Wicked, and here we are." After reading the program and Brittany's energy level reaching bouncing levels, the show finally started.

Santana had seen Wicked before, and she honestly enjoyed it. The story was a little lame but the show itself was good. But nothing beat watching Brittany's face throughout the performance. She was literally on the edge of her seat. Anytime she saw something that she thought was amazing (which happened fairly often) her jaw would drop and she'd point. Santana had never seen someone enjoy something so much. She vowed she'd see every Broadway show ever again if Brittany's reaction was anything like this.

After the show Brittany had to go to the bathroom so Santana got their coats and waited for her. She kind of had to go but she didn't love public bathrooms for obvious reasons so she would rather just wait. But the line was kind of long so Santana walked over to look at the merchandise table. She remembered her mom had said it'd be ok to get Brittany something if she wanted it. But she knew Brittany would never ask so she bought her a hoodie (because you could never have enough) and went back to waiting in the designated spot for Brittany.

Once they were back in the car Santana not so subtly put the hoodie on Brittany's lap. "What's th- Is this for me too?"

Santana nodded. "Mom told me to get you one." That was a small stretching of the truth but whatever. She kind of did. Brittany was too excited over the show and now the hoodie to even be modest about having been bought another gift. "So. We're headed home now but the night is not over." Brittany wondered what could possibly be left as she watched the bright lights out of her window, hand tucked into Santana's.

When they get home Santana leads Brittany inside and the first thing Brittany notices is that it is both dark and quiet. "Where is everyone?" Santana looks back at her with a sexy smile while she continues pulling Brittany up the stairs.

"We've got the house to ourselves. Until tomorrow." Brittany felt warmth pool low in her stomach. She knew what that meant. Before they went into the bedroom, Santana stopped her. "Wait out here for one second." She kissed Brittany and then snuck into her bedroom so that Brittany couldn't see inside. The anticipation was building inside of Brittany and even though Santana only left her in the hallway for less than a minute, if it had been any longer Brittany was going to go in after her.

But just then the door opened and Santana's arm reached out for Brittany to take, and pulled her inside. She gasped when her eyes adjusted to the dim light. The room was lit with candles that were placed all around the room. The bed was neatly made with flower petals scattered across it. Santana pulled her closer and wrapped her in her arms. "Happy Birthday."

Brittany leaned in to kiss Santana. The kiss was slow and sensual and made the flickering heat in her belly rise to a slow deep burn. Without breaking the kiss Santana ran her hands up Brittany's back and pulled the zipper down. Brittany moaned into Santana's mouth. She wanted her so bad. Santana broke the kiss to focus on sliding Brittany's dress down her arms until gravity took it to the floor. She began to lay kisses down the column of Brittany's neck. She continued to kiss across her collarbone before reaching behind Brittany and unclasping her bra. She stepped back to pull it off. Her breath caught in her throat as she took a moment to look at Brittany's flawless body bathed in warm candlelight. "So beautiful." She whispered with reverence.

"You have too many clothes on." Brittany said as she put her arms around Santana's neck to unzip her dress before pulling it down and removing Santana's strapless bra. She ran her hands down Santana's rib cage to the top of her compression shorts. She hated the way they bit into Santana's skin. They were tighter than the ones she wore most days and when she pulled them down the indents looked so painful. She crouched down so that she was eye level with Santana's semi-stiff dick. She looked up into her brown eyes before placing soft kisses to the deepest of the indents.

Santana felt herself getting harder as Brittany laid kisses so close to where she'd love to have Brittany's lips. But this wasn't how she wanted to do this. So she reached down and gently pulled Brittany up. "Tonight is about you." She whispered as she palmed Brittany's breast and swiped her thumbs over already stiff nipples. She backed Brittany up until her legs hit the bed. She sat down and slid backwards until she could lay her head on the pillows, never breaking eye contact with Santana. Santana leaned forward and hooked her fingers under the sides of Brittany's lace panties, sliding them down and off of her long legs.

With her hands on Brittany's knees she parted her legs before bending forward to kiss the skin there. She continued her path of little kisses up Brittany's thigh, getting closer to where she wanted to be. Brittany's breaths came faster the closer that she got. But she wanted to make this last. After placing a last kiss on her thigh, she moved so that her face was hovering over Brittany's center, and blew a warm stream of air onto her before she moved back down and started to kiss the same path on the other leg.

She continued to blow warm breaths and place kisses so light Brittany could barely feel them. Her hips began to move in search of a firmer touch but not until she vocalized her need, "Santana please" did Santana give in. She began by placing slightly more firm kisses to her slit before running her tongue from her center to her clit, parting her folds slowly.

Brittany gripped the bed sheets in her fists as she rolled her hips trying to get more friction with Santana's tongue. She felt Santana's hands grip her hips to hold her steady just before soft lips circled her clit and began to suck. Brittany felt Santana's name escape her lips again. Suddenly she was overcome with the desire to see what was going on, so she propped herself up on her elbows lightly so she could see Santana's head between her legs.

Santana felt Brittany sit up so she opened her eyes and looked up to make eye contact with her as she dragged her tongue slowly to Brittany's center, circling it once before plunging in. Brittany threw her head back at the feeling, knowing it wouldn't be much longer. "Make me cum." She whined, unable to handle the mounting pressure in her abdomen. Santana moaned in response and the vibrations shot through Brittany making her collapse back to the bed.

Santana alternated between quick thrusts into Brittany with her tongue, and flicking her clit rapidly. She felt her muscles contract, and then with a sound that Santana suspected may have been her name, Brittany came hard.

Santana began kissing her way up Brittany's body, excited for part two, but also unsure. As soon as Brittany regained her ability to breathe normally Santana whispered into her ear. "You get to pick what comes next baby. Anything you want."

Brittany bit her lip as she looked up into Santana's loving eyes. She wanted everything. But since Brittany had taken her on the chair, she had been curious about new positions.

Santana sensed the hesitation in Brittany so she lowered herself down and kissed her fully. "Anything at all."

"I think I want to try from behind. But I'm nervous. Bec-"

"I know. I know why you're nervous. What if we try, and then if even for a second you feel uncomfortable we'll stop and I will make love to you in a way I know is comfortable for both of us. Ok?" Brittany nods before Santana leans down to kiss her again. Both stealing her breath and making her feel like she has never breathed correctly before this moment. Santana pulls away and shifts herself so that she's kneeling on one side of Brittany. "Roll over baby."

Brittany does. And Santana goes to kiss her shoulder and she can feel how tense Brittany is. Part of her wants to roll Brittany back over because the idea that she's uncomfortable at all makes Santana weary. But Brittany asked for this. So maybe Santana just needed to find a way to make her comfortable.  
She looked over to the bed stand where she had a bottle of lotion set, originally for a back massage after they were done, but maybe that will help now. She brushes Brittany's hair away from her ear and tells her that she wants to do something else first. She straddled Brittany again, making sure to move slowly and deliberately so that Brittany could feel her there with no surprises. She grabbed the bottle of lotion and squirted some in her hands before rubbing them together to warm it.

She started at Brittany's shoulders rubbing out the tension and listening to the satisfied little noises that Brittany was making. When she feels her muscles start to loosen there, she moves further down rubbing gentle circles over her spine and trailing her fingers down to her ribs. She loved the differences in noises that Brittany made. Little moans that meant this feels good, and little gasps that sounded an awful lot like please touch me.

She kept rubbing Brittany's back till she felt Brittany let go of the fear that she had been holding in her muscles. "Ok. Now, I want you to sit up on your knees." Brittany did as she was asked."Now lean forward and put your hands on the headboard." When Brittany did this Santana kissed down her spine slowly. "Does this feel ok?" Brittany nodded. More than ok.

Santana continued to kiss Brittany's back as she ran her hand over her ribs, to her stomach and then down to where she could feel Brittany was still very much warm and wet. She spread her folds with her fingers, and used her other hand to line herself up with Brittany's center. "Ready?" She whispered, still kissing Brittany's back. Brittany's hand had come around at some point and was clutching Santana's side.  
"Please." She whispered back, and Santana began to ease herself in slowly. She watched the muscles in Brittany's arm flex as she gripped the headboard harder. She was fairly certain that this was the deepest she'd ever been able to get as she finally felt Brittany nestle into her hips. Santana was suddenly aware of just how much of Brittany was open and available to her in this position. She wrapped her arms around Brittany so she was holding their bodies together before she started to move in and out.  
Brittany could feel Santana filling her. She could feel Santana surrounding her. Strong but gentle strokes hitting every wonderful spot inside of her. She had never felt so full. She began to rock back into Santana's forward trusts and the established a rhythm that had Brittany unsure that she would be able to support herself much longer. "Harder." She gasped.

Santana complied. She began to thrust harder feeling Brittany's body bounce when they connected. She felt Brittany shift up straighter and bring her other arm to her own torso to lace her fingers into Santana's. Their bodies now flush together, she shifted her arms to support more of Brittany's weight. Her free arm braced Brittany's chest, cupping one of her breasts and gently rolling a hard nipple between her finger and thumb. The hand that Brittany was holding moved down to her lower abdomen to press Brittany further into her, as she continued to thrust hard and deep. She knew it was probably just Brittany's muscles flexing, but she thought she could almost feel herself thrusting into her with the hand that was pressed tight to Brittany's belly.

She hasn't realized how close Brittany's mouth was to her ear until she heard Brittany whisper "You feel so good inside of me." Hotly into her ear. Her eyes rolled back and it took every ounce of strength not to explode inside of Brittany. "Don't stop."

Santana began to thrust slightly faster and a broken moan came from Brittany's mouth. "You are so beautiful. Mine." Santana replied. She felt Brittany start to slide the hand that was on her lower belly down until she took two of Santana's fingers and guide them to her clit.

"Yours." She moaned. Eyes squeezed shut. Santana began to rub circles around her clit, biting her lip because she needed to last just a little bit longer. Brittany's hand never left her own as she fingered Brittany's clit. "G-na cum" Brittany breathed out as Santana felt her muscles squeeze her cock even tighter.

"So tight baby. Fuck." And Santana exploded. She continued to rub Brittany's clit quickly and before she had finished cumming, Brittany's muscles locked down and she stilled Santana's circling fingers, both of their hands now cupping her. Santana could feel her pulsing with her fingers, and from inside of her. She held still in that position until she felt Brittany relax again. Then she eased out of her and lowered them both back to the bed, Brittany rotating as to press herself against Santana's front.

"That was amazing." Brittany mumbled into Santana's neck when she finally found her voice. Santana was combing her fingers through Brittany's hair thinking the same thing.

"You're amazing. Happy Birthday love."

"Best Birthday ever." Santana shifted down so that she was laying face to face with Brittany.

"Yeah?" Brittany nodded. "Good. That was my goal. I better start planning how I'm going to top this next year." She saw Brittany's face scrunch up in protest. "Nope. Get used to it. You being born was the greatest thing that ever happened to me. I plan on celebrating it and there's nothing you can do to stop me."

Brittany shook her head but couldn't wipe the smile off of her face. She shifted and tried not to moan, feeling Santana's and her own cum leak out of her.

"What?" Santana saw a shift in Brittany's facial expression.

"I can feel your cum inside me. And coming out of me."

"I'm…sorry?"

"No. I love it. Don't apologize."

"Good. Do we need to shower?"

"Probably but I still don't trust my legs. And I don't want to get up. We can shower together in the morning?"

"Sounds perfect." Santana replied as she wrapped her arm around Brittany to pull her in closer as they shifted into one of their favorite positions to sleep in. Santana partially on her side with Brittany half laying on top of Santana, on her stomach. Arms and legs twisted together. Head on Santana's shoulder. "Love you B."

"Love you too."

The next morning Santana wakes up to the feeling of Brittany running her fingers from her belly button, up and over her breasts and back down. "Mmm" She swallows to try and clear the morning from her voice. "That feels good."

"Good morning." Brittany rotates her head only slightly laying a small kiss onto Santana's bicep. Then goes back to looking into her eyes.

"What are you thinking about?"

"I want you inside of me again. But your mom is home." Santana groans in response.

"I can't tell if I love when you say things like that, or hate it because I know we can't do anything about it." Brittany smiles and moves in to finally kiss Santana's lips.

"If we behave ourselves can we shower together?" Brittany asks with a slight pout. Santana rolls onto her side and presses their lips together again.

"I think we can do that."

They can't do that. Santana should know by now that they can't spend time naked together in that close proximity with the water running and she can not, no matter what, keep her dick from getting hard. "Can I touch you please Santana? We'll be quiet." Brittany whispers hotly in her ear. Santana nods because she doesn't trust herself with words. Brittany's hand is traveling slowly down her abdomen and Santana swallows at the anticipation.

"MIJA! GET DOWN HERE BREAKFAST IS ALMOST DONE!"  
Brittany's hand stops in it's track and she looks at Santana, eyes wide. Santana kisses her chastely. "We should maybe finish this another time. Go ahead and get out. I need a few seconds of cold water." Brittany looks at her confused until Santana gestures towards her hip where she sees that Santana is only slightly less hard than she was a few seconds ago.

Brittany gets out and is toweling her hair when she hears a hiss from inside the shower, "Fuck that's cold." She grabs Santana's towel and waits for her to shut the water off. Then stands outside the shower with the towel open and wraps her up in it when she gets out.

When they get downstairs they hear voices in the dining room so they head in that direction. To Brittany's surprise, Luis was there as well as Santana's mom and dad (less surprising). They sat down, put food on their plate, and started to eat. By now Brittany was used to Maribel putting extra food on hers and Santana's plates without asking or even mentioning it. She'd eat it if she could or leave it and one of Santana's brother or Antonio would eat it. Food was not often wasted in the Lopez house.

"How was your birthday Britt?" Luis was genuinely curious. He had heard Santana's plans and thought it was a perfect idea for her.

"It was so incredible!" she gushed. "I was so surprised. But it was amazing. The restaurant was so good. Oh God! Thank you so much for that Antonio and Maribel. It was amazing."

"Our pleasure sweetie." Maribel said as she put another piece of bacon on Santana's plate.

After breakfast they all hang out in the living room together. The TV was on but for the most part they were just talking about various things going on in their lives. Brittany and Santana told them about their classes next semester. Brittany let it slip about her tutoring and she felt her face burn with embarrassment.

"That's great Brittany! If you find they aren't giving you enough attention let me know and I'll put a call in. I know enough people who work at that university that I'm sure I have some names to throw around." Antonio responded.

"You have nothing to be embarrassed about baby." Santana whispers in her ear. Brittany nods and goes on to tell him the other things they were going to help her with. She settled back into Santana who wrapped her arms around her waist. The afternoon passed fairly quickly in conversation and card games. Brittany loved these times. Her family didn't spend any time together really. Not that she wanted to spend time with them anyway but this was amazing. They genuinely liked each other's company.

"Santana can you come help me for a second." Her mother called from the kitchen. Santana unwrapped herself and went into the kitchen.

"So you and Brittany are going to leave soon right?"

"Yeah Mami. I'm still not sure that surprises are her thing."

"Shush you. She's going to love this. Leave everything up to me. Just keep her out of the house for a few hours." Santana nodded her consent and went back into the living room

"What did you mom need?"

"Just help with her phone. She still doesn't understand it."

"Can you blame her? I wouldn't get it either if it weren't for you."

"You still use mine most of the time anyway. So. It's not super cold out today, do you maybe want to go drive around. I can show you my old school and stuff."

"Yes! That sounds awesome."

"K. Let's go put on something other than sweatpants." They go upstairs and Brittany pulls out jeans and a sweater and turns to Santana who is getting ready to pull on her compression shorts.

"Do you have to wear those? I hate that they hurt you. I understand if you want to. I just don't want you to feel like you have to."

Santana ducked her head and gripped the shorts in her hands. "I don't want people to notice. Or stare. I don't want to deal with it." Brittany walked over to her and put her arms on Santana's shoulders and clasped them at the back of her neck.

"No one will notice. Or stare. But what if you wear those sexy low cut jeans you have that are the looser fit?" Santana shrugged and Brittany kissed her temple. "You are perfect. Everything about you is perfect. Do you prefer to wear them?"

"Not really. They leave the marks and make my hips sore because they're so tight. But I can't wear tighter girlier stuff without them. It's embarrassing."

"Ok. So if you feel that way, then what if you worked on wearing them less with looser clothes, and in situations where you feel comfortable. I'm not trying to make you uncomfortable San. I just hate the idea of you hurting for any reason."

"If I put the jeans on will you tell me if you can see my penis?"  
"Yep." Brittany pecks Santana's lips and smacks her butt lightly. Santana pulled on a pair of boxer briefs and then her jeans. She stood in front of Brittany and pulled up her shirt.

"Any bulge?" Brittany looked carefully. Wanting Santana to know she'd be honest no matter what, and that she could trust her.  
"Definitely not from the side. When you stand like that I can see the faintest outline. But honestly it looks like it could be something in your pocket, or anything really. I would never notice if I wasn't looking for it. Ok?"

"Ok." Santana smiled and laid her head on Brittany's shoulder. Santana hadn't ever thought that she had a problem with her anatomy. Sure she tried to hide it but wouldn't anyone in her circumstance? It wasn't until Brittany that she realized she didn't need to hide. It felt so much more comfortable without the shorts under her jeans.

They spent the afternoon driving around the island. Santana drove past her favorite park as a kid, and where they used to go to church before it closed. They stopped and got hot chocolate at a tiny little store that Santana mentioned she saw all the time but had never gone in. They would definitely be going back. When the sun was starting to set they wound up at Santana's high school. They got out and buttoned up their coats and walked around a little bit. "This is where I used to park every day. Once I got a car. It's where all the popular kids parked."

"So you were always popular?"

"Yeah. Pretty much. Anyone with older siblings knew my brothers who were all on the football team, so that helped. Plus nobody but the cheerleading squad really knew about my little friend." She gestured towards her crotch.

"Baby there is nothing little about you." Santana shook her head and laughed.

"Anyway. Quinn helped keep my secret best we could. A rumor went around ounce but most people thought it was too crazy to be true. The girls on the squad, well, other than the whole bet thing, they just kind of didn't really talk about it. Especially once Quinn and I were co-captains."

"Were you guys mean to the other students?" It was something Brittany would feel guilty about for the rest of her life she thought. She hadn't personally ever been mean, not intentionally, but standing by and watching it happen was just as bad.

"I don't think we were as bad as some schools. There were so many people in our school that while we were definitely popular, there were enough people to balance that out. I think if any one group had gotten too mean, the rest of the school would have stopped respecting them. So their popularity wouldn't have meant anything. I think we were just more elitists. You know?"

Brittany nodded. "Yeah. We just partied together and hung out together. Most of us were also the more well off so that probably had something to do with it too."

"Popular kids at our school were really mean. It was terrible. Kids would get thrown in dumpsters. Or while they were in gym someone would steal all of their clothes so they had to wear those stupid shorts and shirt for the rest of the day. Lunches knocked in their faces in the cafeteria. All kinds of stuff. And they spread the worst rumors. I never did anything like that, but I never stopped it. I bet I missed out on a lot of nice friends because of the kind of person my parents were pushing me to be."

"Well whatever they were pushing you towards, you turned out amazing all on your own. Kids do that kind of stuff."

"Yeah but I still think about it. It still upsets me that I didn't stop it. Or said sorry. Or just make friends with the kids that I knew needed one."

"Maybe you could look up a few of them on Facebook. Maybe send them a message and apologize?"

"Maybe. So, what else Miss Ex Head Cheerleader?"

"Well, this is the football field. We practiced out here until it was so cold our water bottles would freeze. That was when we were allowed to practice in the gym."

"Wow. Strict." The gate wasn't locked so they walked out onto the field heading towards a set of bleachers.

"Oh God. Right under here is where I totally caught Quinn making out with a boy for the first time." Santana tugged her hand and lead her under the bleachers.

"Did you stop her?"

"I didn't mean to but I gasped. The guy kind of panicked and ran away. Quinn wasn't too upset. Apparently it wasn't that awesome." Brittany laughed.

"What about you? Any makeout sessions under the bleachers?" Santana shook her head, chuckling. Who would she have made out with? "Want to change that?" Brittany took a step closer and pressed their wind chilled lips together. Things quickly heated up and Brittany was pressing Santana against the cement wall. She moaned into Santana's mouth before slowing the kiss down and pulling apart. "It's so cold. We should get back to the car." Santana nodded. Dazed by Brittany, which was a completely common occurrence.

By time they got back to the car it was pretty dark. They got in and Santana turned the heat on immediately. Brittany looked over at her and down into her lap. She noticed the outline of Santana's appendage was a little more pronounced. She was, despite the cold, a little hard. Brittany licked her lips. "Turn off your headlights."

"Why? It's dark."

"I want to try something." Before Santana turned the lights off, she reached over and stroked the ridge in Santana's jeans.

"Shit. B. Wh-"

"Just turn the car off." Santana did as she was told as Brittany fumbled by street light to unbutton Santana's fly. She pulled Santana's semi-hard cock out of the confines of her boxers and wasted no time in leaning over and taking her into her mouth.

"Fuck." Santana hissed as Brittany's head started to bob up and down bringing Santana to full length quickly. She pulled up so that just the head was in her mouth and circled it with her tongue while she gripped the rest of her length and began moving her hand up and down. Santana had no idea where to put her hands. She was still hesitant to put them on Brittany's head because she didn't want Brittany to feel forced. But she was in a car. And she had limited options.

She settled for laying one gently on Brittany's back, and gripping the steering wheel hard with the other. Brittany moaned as Santana felt precum start to seep out. Brittany tongued the slit, vibrations from her moaning driving Santana insane. Just when she thought it couldn't get any better, Brittany started to take more of her into her mouth than she'd ever done before. Santana felt the tip of her dick hit the back of Brittany's throat before she lifted back up again, bobbing up and down.

Santana knew enough to know that, warning or not, Brittany wanted to swallow. Santana squeaked out something that sounded vaguely like "I'm cumming" and lifted her hips up slightly as she felt herself explode into Brittany's mouth. "Fuck. Baby." She gritted her teeth as Brittany fisted the base of her cock and firmly stroked upwards swallowing the last of the cum that dribbled out. She made sure Santana was clean before she gently slipped her back into her underwear and buttoned up her pants.

When she sat up Santana's head was still back against the headrest and her hand was still gripping the steering wheel tightly. "Good?" She kissed Santana's lips lightly.

"Uh huh. Perfect." She regained composure and leaned forward and kissed Brittany thoroughly, smiling at her taste that lingered there. She pulled out her phone and saw a text from her mom that said come back now. It had only been sent a few minutes ago, which was good since she was supposed to be paying attention and waiting for that text.

"Ugh. Mom wants us home for dinner."

"Guess I could eat again." Brittany flashed a cheshire grin at Santana who smacked her lightly on the thigh.  
Santana was impressed when they get back onto her street that she didn't see any cars. She parked in her usual spot, all the lights were out in the house

"I thought you said your mom wanted us home for dinner." Brittany commented as she grabbed Santana's hand, walking to the door. Santana internally panicked, still typing to her mother that they were here.

"Uh. They must have gone out instead."

"Darn. Guess we'll just have to find something else to eat." Brittany smiled wickedly. Santana wished that was a possibility.

"Maybe. See if the door is unlocked before I dig my keys back out."

Brittany twisted the knob and pushed the door open, they walked a few steps into the door and shut it before the lights all flipped on and "SURPRISE!"

Brittany screamed in response as she jumped back. Santana was quick to catch her. Laughing in her ear. "Happy Birthday part two baby."

"Oh my God! Who's idea was this?"

"Mami and Papi. They were jealous that they didn't get to celebrate too." Brittany smiled and looked around the room.

"Rachel?!" She crossed over and hugged her.

"Happy belated Birthday Brittany!"

"You didn't come here just for this did you?"

"I confess it was just lucky circumstance. I actually came here to see my new girlfriend." Brittany looked down at her hand, which was clasped tightly in a very happy looking Quinn's.

"You'll have to tell me all about that." Brittany smiled.

While Brittany was talking to Rachel, Santana heard her name called. She turned her head and saw her abuela standing with her mami.

"Hola Abuela."

"I would like to be introduced to your girlfriend."

"As soon as she's done saying hello to her friends I promise." Her grandmother nodded her head sternly and turned to tuck in Miguel's shirt in the back.

"Why is she here?" Santana loved her grandmother. A lot actually. She had always been good to her. She was just not the most warm person when you first met her. A little stern. And very forward.

"She insisted when I told her what we were doing tonight. " Maribel defended. Her mother, Eva, had called earlier that day to insist that Maribel and Antonio come for dinner that evening. After finding out that they couldn't, and why, she insisted she'd be over as soon as she found something suitable to wear."

"I can hear you talking about me. I have the right to meet my granddaughter's girlfriend. Since I was deprived of that opportunity at Christmas. Now go get her." Santana headed in the direction of Brittany.

"You be nice to her Mami. This is the mother of your future great grandbabies. Be nice. I mean it."

"I'm always nice." Before Maribel could argue, Santana was walking back with a suddenly shy Brittany.

"Abuela this is Brittany. Brittany this is my abuela." Brittany reached out a hand and timidly shook the older woman's hand.

"N-Nice to meet you Mrs…?" This woman was intimidating Brittany thought. She had heard about Santana's grandparents before and knew for sure this was Maribel's mom but had no idea what to call her. The woman stared at her for a few seconds before she answered.

"Abuela. You can call me abuela as well Brittany. I hear you're part of the family so that will work just fine." Maribel exhaled her fear of what her mother might say gone. "I hear you'll be giving me great grandchildren."

Brittany, without looking, reached over and started patting a choking Santana's back. She smiled and nodded gently. "I think that might be the plan. Someday."

"Well I'm not getting any younger." Santana's grandmother replied.

"Mami!" "Abuela!" Santana and her mother yelled at the same time. Eva smirked (the same smirk that Brittany had seen on many of the Lopez children) and walked away.

Brittany made her rounds making sure to thank everyone that came individually. It wasn't a lot of people. But she didn't know a ton of people that lived in the city. All of Santana's brothers were there, and her parents and grandmother, Quinn, Rachel, and Kurt. Rachel had been the biggest surprise. Brittany had known that Kurt lived in the city so it made more sense that he was here.

"My fathers wanted to fly out and come too but they had to go to a work party. I knew I would be here on your birthday, so we got you this! It was just luck being here for the surprise birthday." Rachel handed her a package.

"Rachel you didn't have to. You guys are so awesome to me already. I can't wait to go back and visit." Brittany carefully opened the box and pulled out yet another beautiful dress. "I love it so much! Your dads are so good at picking clothes!"

"Yes they do like that you wear the kind of clothes that they pick out."

"You should let them pick stuff out for you too Rach." Brittany had not meant that as an insult at all. Perhaps just a poorly timed comment, but Santana doubled over with laughter.

"You totally should hobbit." Santana ruffled Rachel's hair before walking away.

"Why does she make fun of my height? She's barely taller than me."

"She's just insecure Rach. Ignore her." Quinn growled in Santana's direction which just made her laugh more.

Brittany saw Kurt standing by himself so she went over to say hello again. "I'm really glad you're here Kurt. Are you having a good break?" Kurt just nodded, continuing to stare off. "Is something wrong?"

"That is literally a wall of hot men. I've had dreams about this." Brittany turned around and noticed the Lopez brothers were all standing near the closet door. Brittany just laughed and bounced away leaving Kurt to gawk.

"So tell us how this happened." Santana said as the she, Brittany, Quinn, Rachel, and Kurt were standing in a circle. She gestured toward Quinn and Rachel.

"Well, Brittany had given me the wonderful advice of appealing to Quinn's romantic side. So I flew out here with the permission and blessing of my parents. But then I realized once I got here I didn't know where she lived or how to get to her house. So I had to call her to come pick me up from the airport. Which was, I'll admit, less than romantic. It turns out that spontaneous isn't really for me."

"It was still romantic." Quinn replied, wrapping her arm around Rachel's waist.

"I just told her how I felt, and she feels the same way. And here we are. I may have also sang. But I can't stop myself, it just comes from me."

Santana was trying desperately to hold back her laughter but then Brittany whispered in her ear. "Don't laugh baby, you sing to me all the time." Quinn heard and cocked an eyebrow at her, which elicited an eye roll from Santana.

After Kurt had gone and Brittany was showing Quinn her new charm for her charm bracelet, Rachel pulled Santana off to the side.

"I need some help."

"Well, yeah."

"Stop it Santana I'm serious." Santana uncrossed her arms and sat down on the couch, Rachel followed.

"Well. This may come as a surprise to you, but I am still a virgin."

"No shit?" Santana replied sarcastically.

"Santana I'm serious!"

"Ok. Sorry. Go ahead."

"Well. I was doing some research on how girls have sex with other girls. And I came across something called fanfiction. These are stories about characters from television shows or movies. Some include very graphic scenes of a sexual nature." Santana was biting the inside of her cheek hard to prevent herself from laughing. But she wanted this over as soon as possible so she urged Rachel to continue. "Well, in a lot of stories it seems that you stimulate them internally with your fingers and then once you're ready for them to climax, you just push their clitoris. Is this correct?"

"Jesus Christ Berry it's not all BOOP the clit and then BAM orgasm." Santana was blushing. "Couldn't you just watch porn like a normal person."

"It seemed too graphic."

"Listen. Just, experiment. Quinn won't know what she's doing either so you're both kind of unsure together. It'll be fine." Her face was starting to turn red. The last thing Santana wanted to talk to Rachel about was Quinn and sex.

"Ok. Last question."

"Fuck. Ok. What?"

"Do you know of any of Quinn's fantasies that I should be aware of?"

"Get out of here Berry! Go. Now. We are done with this." Santana pointed away from her and Rachel jumped up and ran over to Quinn.

The night ended with promises to see Quinn and Rachel within the next few days, lots of hugs, and thank you's.

After Brittany had hugged and thanked Santana's parents for the millionth time, they headed upstairs to get ready for bed. As they lay there cuddled up under the covers Santana thought back on her conversation with Rachel. Why was she concerned with fantasies already? Santana didn't even know Brittany's. Which she thought, seemed a little weird.

"Hey Britt?"

"Hmmm?"

"Can I ask you a question?" Santana sounded meeker than usual.

"Always."

"What. Uh. What are your, you know, fantasies?"

"Like sex fantasies?" She felt Santana nod. "I guess I don't really have any."

"What?"

"I've only really liked sex since I've been with you. And it's fantastic. So I haven't spent a lot of time thinking about ways to make it better. It gets better pretty much every time. And I never touch myself on my own so I guess I just haven't thought a lot about it. I guess I do have them though. Sex on the chair was one. But I kind of just thought about it and then did it right away."

"Oh. So, nothing you want to do?"

"Not that I can think of right now. Other positions I guess. But does that count as a fantasy?"

"Kind of. You should think about it more. It's healthy to imagine stuff like that. And then we can keep things exciting. Not that sex isn't always exciting with you because it is." Brittany giggled and kissed her.

"Ok. What about you?"

Santana was suddenly embarrassed. "I don't know."

"Yes you do. You wouldn't have brought it up if you didn't."

"Well. I really liked watching you touch yourself in the hotel that night. After our first time."

"We can do that again. We can do anything you want. That's my fantasy, making all of yours come true."

"Britt that doesn't count. But I love you for saying it anyway."

"What else. San you can tell me. I can tell you're holding something back."

"It's not something I ever wanted before you. Or even thought about really. It's kind of weird. You probably will be grossed out."

"Never. Just tell me." She cuddled closer and kissed Santana again.

"I kind of want to maybe try anal. Like I just... I don't know Britt. I want you inside of me. Somehow. And since our first time I loved that feeling of being inside of you but I want to know what it's like. And I know we can't do it for real. It's stupid. I'm sorry I brought it up."

"Stop San. I hate that word. Why do you think I wouldn't want to do that with you?"

"Because of your history with Tommy. And because it's weird."

"It's not weird. And don't let him get in the way of our lives any more than he already has." Brittany pushed Santana's shoulders so that she was laying flat and crawled on top of her. "I love you. I want to do this with you. Do you want just my fingers or like a strap on?"

"I don't know. I haven't thought a lot about it honestly. Just sometimes when I'm in the shower thinking about you, my brain goes there."

"So then we will. Someday." She kisses Santana before laying her head back on her chest. "Will I hurt you if I sleep like this?"

"Nope. I'm strong and you're light." She crossed her arms across Brittany's back, pulling her closer.

The rest of break passed pleasantly. Brittany had worried for the first few days that she would get a call from one of her family members but it didn't happen. She was happy for not having to deal with them, but some small part of her was a little upset that they hadn't even cared enough to check how she was. Santana hadn't brought it up much, but when they were laying in bed one night she admitted that she couldn't believe her parents didn't at least call on her birthday. Brittany could believe they hadn't. It still kind of hurt, so they didn't really talk about it much after that.

A few days before they were due back at school, Maribel told them they were going shopping. They went out and stopped at an office supplies store, and she restocked them with pens and paper and other things they needed. They went to Target and Maribel just started throwing stuff in the cart as they were talking. "Do either of you need socks or underwear? Never mind. I already know the answer." She threw a few packs of socks in the cart. She tossed in a pack of boxer briefs and went over to the girls section and tossed in a pack of tighter fitting boy short underwear that Brittany had seen Santana wearing. "What size do you wear Brittany?"

"Uh. I don't know?" Brittany didn't want Maribel to feel like she had to buy her things. Maybe not knowing what size would deter her.

"I'll guess. Probably the same as Santana." Maribel responds.

"Oh you should get these ones." Santana said without thinking, picking up a pack of lacy boy shorts.

"No. Keep it in you pants Santana." Maribel threw in a few packs for Brittany before moving on. After they left target they went to a restaurant for lunch.

"Brittany can I ask you some questions about your family?"

"Um. Sure?"

"I'm just curious as to what your situation is with them. I know what happened and why Santana brought you home to us. But why would your mother have him over if she knew he'd hurt you?"

"I don't know. She's never really cared about me. She thinks I'm too stupid to ever do anything on my own. I had a lot of trouble in school. She was mad at me all the time and made me miss dance class a lot. And I think she thought if Tommy and I got married she wouldn't have to deal with me anymore."

"This just doesn't make any sense. Why would she do that to you?" Maribel had said it more to herself than anything. There is no way anyone could make sense of this situation.

"My sister says it's because I didn't fix the family." Brittany answers quietly. Santana turned her head towards Brittany, she hadn't ever thought to ask. She just thought her mother was a crazy bitch.

"What do you mean Britt?" She asked.

"My dad has been cheating on my mom since a few years after my sister was born. My sister said that mom told her things were really good after she was born so she got pregnant with me on purpose even though they weren't planning on having more kids. But it didn't work. He keeps cheating. But she won't leave because she doesn't have a job or anything. So I think she blames me. And then I wasn't smart like my sister so that just made it worse."

"She's been like this your whole life?" Maribel's heart was breaking for this girl. She didn't know why knowing that it had been happening her whole life or just a part of her life made a difference.

"Ever since I can remember." Santana scooted closer to Brittany. She was handling the conversation well. She was sad but Santana thought she might be taking it worse. Her hands were shaking and she wanted to kill someone and take Brittany into her arms and never let go at the same time. She grabbed Brittany's hands instead.

"How did you turn out so good?"

"I don't know if I'm that good. But I think I'm not like them because I figured out that it hurt to be treated the way they treated me. But it felt nice to be treated the way a few other people treated me. And I didn't want to make people feel bad."

"You say you're not smart Brittany, But for you to have figured that out at a young age is miraculous." Maribel said while fighting tears. "Who were the good people?"

"I had a really nice babysitter. She watched us a lot after school but my sister was older so she was away at friends usually. But my babysitter was really nice. She'd help me with my homework and she never yelled. She hugged me every day." Santana's heart broke. The idea that Brittany would cherish the person that gave her a hug everyday was heartbreaking. Santana's mom and dad hugged her all the time. Her brothers hugged her just as much. The fact that Brittany only got hugs when she was babysat made her vow to hug her at least a thousand times a day for the rest of their lives.

"I also had a few really good dance teachers. I think they knew how my parents were treating me and why I wouldn't come to dance class sometimes because of my grades. Or because they didn't want to drive me sometimes. If we were working on a new routine they would tape it for me so I could still learn it and catch up. Plus dance used to be the thing that made me the most happy in the world. So the people that were teaching me that would always be some of my favorite people."

"Used to make you the most happy?" Maribel asked.

"Being loved and loving kind of tops everything doesn't it?" She couldn't hold it back any longer, a tear slid down Maribel's cheek.

"Yeah babe. It does." Santana said as she kissed Brittany's cheek.

"We need dessert! Someone bring these girls dessert!" Santana shook her head and let her mom deal with her feelings however she needed to. Plus she knew Brittany really liked dessert.

"Well" Maribel started as they all ate dessert a few minutes later. "Unless something drastic happens and your family does a complete turn around, I expect you at our house for breaks and vacations. No asking, I'll just assume if Santana is coming that you are too. Ok?" Brittany nodded her confirmation, too happy, and mouth too full to speak.

Brittany spent that night excited to spend the rest of break in this house that she felt more at home in than she'd ever been in her own house with her own family. She was excited to spend any time she could with Santana, always. And she was even kind of excited to go back to school and take classes. For once in her life she felt like she might be able to do this, and wasn't so nervous she felt sick over the first day back.


	18. Chapter 18

"What songs are you going to play at open mic on Wednesday?" Brittany asked Santana at dinner on the first day back to school. They had already talked about their first classes, which seemed to be going ok. Syllabus day was never very difficult. It had been stressful last semester because Brittany was learning all of the difficult challenges she would be facing. But this semester she was kind of excited. Her one non-dance class professor had pulled her aside after class and told her that everything had been set up and that she would be getting the notes a few days before class so she had time to print them and bring them with her. He had been very nice about the extra work he had to do to help her and it was nice to not feel like a burden.

"I shouldn't tell you just like you wouldn't let me see you dance." Santana smiled popping a tomato into her mouth.

"At least tell me what kind?"

"Rap."

"Really?"

"…no. But I should try it sometime."

"Totally." Brittany tried to drop it but she was too excited. "Tell me San!"

"How about I tell you two of the four."

"Ok."

"First is Dust in the Wind by Kansas and the second is Wagon Wheel by Old Crow Medicine Show."

"I know the first one. Not the second. When have you been practicing I'm with you like all the time."

"I know them all really well so I don't need to learn them. I practiced a lot this morning while you were in class. And I'll keep practicing until Wednesday. I worked on them at home too while you were hanging out with my mom."

"I kept trying to catch you playing so I could be sneaky and figure out what you were playing." Brittany pouted but Santana just laughed.

"Baby you are the least sneaky person ever. I love you so much, but you are definitely not sneaky." She took a drink of water and put her hand over Brittany's before changing the subject. "Are you nervous about tutoring tomorrow?"

"I thought I would be but no. I'm mostly excited. I really hope they can help me."

"They can B. They exist for a reason. And if things aren't going well, my Dad will call and make sure you get better help." After they were finished eating they cleaned up and left. Santana had assumed that Brittany would be going home with her. "Want to watch a movie tonight?"

"I do. But I have to go back to my dorm. I need to do laundry and I haven't seen Rachel. Is that ok?"

"Yeah of course. I should practice anyway." But Brittany could tell that Santana wasn't being totally honest. Truthfully, Brittany didn't really want to go back to her dorm either but Rachel had asked and she had some research to do that she didn't want Santana to get embarrassed about.

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah babe. Positive." When they got outside Santana pulled Brittany into a hug before they parted. The hug lasted a little extra longer and involved several kisses and then several extra kisses for good measure.

When Brittany got back to the dorm Rachel was on the phone with her dads. So she decided to get some of her research out of the way. She wasn't exactly sure where to start so she opened up Google and typed in 'anal sex' and hit the 'I'm feeling lucky' button. Mistake. Definitely a mistake. So she typed it into Google again and hit search. After wading through some stuff that made her slightly uncomfortable she found some very useful information. Next she needed to look up sex toys. She pulled up a website and started to go through the pages. It was kind of overwhelming, how many different kinds and colors and shapes there were. After almost an hour of searching she decided she needed a break and ran her laundry down to the laundry room.

Rachel got back in the room expecting Brittany to be there. She wasn't, but there was evidence of her having been there. Her book bag was there, and all of the clothes that had been piled on her bed were gone. And her computer was on, which Rachel hadn't seen in months. Curious (which is natural and healthy), she looked at what Brittany had pulled up. Strap-ons. Oh. She hadn't thought about that. Which is ridiculous since it must be a staple of lesbian sex right? Well, if Brittany was buying one for her and Santana then it's something she thought she might as well at least look into.

When Brittany got back into the room Rachel was sitting on her bed looking at her phone. "Hey Rach!" Brittany hopped onto her bed and gave her a one armed hug. They talked about how the rest of their breaks had gone and how things were going between Rachel and Quinn. Then settled on a movie and spent the evening together.

Wednesday came before they knew it. Santana was thankful that she could play and sing these songs in her sleep because she hadn't had a lot of additional time to practice. Brittany seemed to be excited about tutoring but from what she had told Santana it hadn't been more than introductions and discussions about learning so far. Her homework hadn't gotten really heavy yet so Santana reserved the right to be thankful for them until she saw Brittany's stress level not reaching anything like it did last semester.

Even though she wasn't needed to help Brittany with her homework now, she still felt as busy. She had gotten a homework assignment on the first day of class from a professor in the department who genuinely seemed to not like her. "He called me up and asked me to play a piece that I hadn't even thought about since the year before. But I played fine of course-"

"Of course." Brittany nods with a slight smile.

"I'm not trying to be cocky B. It's just not hard for me. I've been playing since I was three. But he told me it was sub par. So I played it again. This time I was sure it was perfect. And he said it could use some improvement. I mean maybe I had some timing issues but I thought it sounded good."

"I get it. That's how hip-hop class will be for me. Is he like that with the other students?"

"No! That's what pisses me off. He tells them their mediocre performances are improving, or doing well. Then he just tells me that I'm not practicing enough so he's going to check my logged hours in the practice rooms. He said that he might start setting a minimum for certain people, meaning me, and if we don't reach it it will affect our grades." Brittany was as confused as Santana. She had heard her play piano, and while she was no expert, she knew it sounded beautiful. And effortless. She could just sit there at a piano, talking to Brittany and play beautiful things without even paying attention. Still holding conversation. Over break, Maribel had showed her videos from Santana's first recital when she was five. She was playing better than some of the kids two or three times her age.

"Maybe he's jealous?"

"I don't know why he would be. He's the teacher, I'm still the student." Brittany shrugged. She didn't really know either.

"Is it bad enough that you think you need to talk to another professor about it?" Santana sighed heavily as she sifted through a drawer looking for another guitar pick.

"I don't think so. Maybe it'll pass." Brittany stepped up behind her and put her arms around Santana, laying little distracting kisses to the back of her neck. She could feel Santana loosen in her arms.

"I'm excited for tonight. Are you?"

"Kind of. Kind of nervous. I don't want to mess up in front of everyone. Or you." They heard a knock on the door just before Quinn came walking in.

"What if we had been naked?"

"It would have been funny to watch you scramble for sheets. Can I borrow your car?

"Mhmm. Where you going?" Santana replied distractedly. Brittany was currently stretching and honestly, you can't blame her for being distracted by that.

"Mall. Oh my God Santana stop you're drooling. Do you guys want to go with?" Santana tore her eyes away from Brittany (reluctantly) and looked at Quinn.

"Can't. Gotta practice for tonight." She looked over at Brittany to see if she was going to go. She was standing there biting her lip looking conflicted. "Go babe I have to focus on this and you distract me. Bring me dinner on your way back?" Brittany nodded. "Need money?" Brittany shook her head.

"Still have the money your dad forced upon me before I left."

"Just let him B. That's what he does. It makes him feel like he's taking care of us even though we aren't there. He still gives Gabe money when he comes home and he definitely doesn't need it. Kiss me. Quinn is waiting." Brittany leaned in and pressed her lips firmly against Santana's. Now she didn't want to leave. They could stay here. Do this. But Santana pulled apart and Brittany was brought back to the reality that she was distracting and Santana did need to focus. So she reluctantly left to with Quinn to the mall.

While at the mall Brittany was content to look and not buy. Except at the candy store because how does anyone help themselves there? On the way back they stopped at the requested Taco Bell for Santana ("Don't ever tell my mother.") and went home. Santana was sitting in the living room still playing her guitar when they got in. She had changed though and looked like she was ready to go. She was standing at the counter eating tacos oblivious to Brittany's staring. But she can't help that either. Santana was just beautiful and she gave up a while ago trying not to stare. She was wearing skinny jeans with flats, a tank top and a black blazer.

"What's up Britt?" She'd been caught.

"You're just so hot." She replied truthfully with a shrug. "And your butt looks amazing in those pants."

"Britt" Santana whined bashfully looking down at her food, unable to keep the smile off of her face. "Get anything at the mall."

"Candy."

"Some of it made it home this time then?" Last time they had gone to the mall Brittany had gotten a lot of candy but managed to eat it all before they got home. She was laid out on the couch for the rest of the night with a terrible stomach ache.

"I learned that lesson." Brittany grimaced recalling the same memory.

Santana spent the rest of the time before leaving playing her guitar, while Brittany finished writing in a notebook that her tutor gave her about how classes had gone that day. When the time came, they all got into Santana's car, picked up Mercedes and Sam, and went to the coffee shop. When they got inside Brittany saw Kurt, Blaine and a few other people from the LGBT group that they almost never attended anymore. Santana said hi to everyone and went to check in. They sat through a few not so great performances and a couple pretty good ones before it was Santana's turn to go up. Brittany stood up, clapping the loudest by far. She was already so proud.

"Uh hey guys. This is really my first time playing in this kind of situation so I hope it goes pretty well. You should all know this one." She proceeded to play what Brittany thought (in a totally unbiased way) might have been the best version of Kansas's Dust in the Wind that she had ever heard. The room went almost completely silent while she played but erupted into the loudest applause left when she was done. Brittany, of course, on her feet beaming at Santana. "Thanks guys. So next I'm going to play another cover. They're all covers actually. But this one is Wagon Wheel by Old Crow Medicine Show. Feel free to sing along or whatever." And people did. The energy in the room was wonderful, except Brittany kind of wished they'd sing less so she could hear Santana more. But, lucky for her she thought, she gets to hear it anytime she wants.

"Everyone likes that song I think. This next one is fun. A little out of genre." Brittany realized she didn't know the next two songs that Santana was going to play. She didn't recognize it at first, she hadn't ever heard the tune before. But then Quinn laughed next to her and shook her head.

"What?" Brittany whispered, still not sure what the song was.

"It's Beyonce. She turned Beyonce acoustic." That's why Brittany began to recognize the words to Crazy in Love. She looked back up to the stage and saw Santana smiling at her. She did a little wave in response. She couldn't help but dance in her seat a little. After the song ended everyone clapped the loudest they had yet which made Santana laughed.

"I thought you guys might like that. Um. This next one, and my last song is for someone very important." She winked at Brittany, who felt her chest swell with love and mouthed 'I love you' to Santana on the stage. "It's called Paperweight."

Brittany hadn't ever heard the song before, but she had heard Santana play it on the guitar without singing it. She tried to focus on the words but got lost at some point, because Santana was looking at her like that. Like she was the only thing that Santana could see in the whole world. And you can't be blamed for not being able to focus when the girl you love is looking at you like that. Santana didn't take her eyes off of Brittany the whole time she sang the song. And when it was over, everyone clapped. "Thanks everyone. It's been awesome." She went to pack up her guitar while they all waited for her to come back to their table. As she left the stage with her guitar Brittany watched her get intercepted by a girl she hadn't ever seen before. She assumed she was in the music program with Santana and went back to throwing little paper balls at Sam.

"Someone is hitting on your girl." Quinn said beside her. Brittany looked back up and the girl was standing awkwardly close to Santana, who looked like she wasn't exactly sure how to get away. "She has nothing on you." Quinn amended. It hadn't been her intention to make Brittany jealous.

"No. I know. But I'm going to go rescue San." Brittany climbs over the others in the booth with a grace that shouldn't be allowed and makes her way up to Santana. "Baby you were so amazing! I loved the song." She put her arms around Santana and kissed her. The girl that had been previously talking to Santana walked away without even saying goodbye. Brittany just laughed. "I'm sorry your friend left." She didn't sound very sorry.

"I'm glad you liked the song. Yeah I don't actually know her she just wouldn't stop talking to me. I was trying to get back to you guys."

"She was hitting on you. I didn't like it."

"Well I didn't even notice because I just wanted to get back to you."

"Mmmm that so?" Brittany smiled as she leaned in for another kiss.

After they pulled apart Santana became very aware that everyone was now watching them. So she bashfully climbed into the booth bringing Brittany with her, successfully hiding them from prying eyes a little bit. Now it was just her friends surrounding her. They congratulated her and told her how amazing she was. They decided to stay and watch a few more people play but Santana spent the rest of them time distracted by Brittany who couldn't seem to stop looking at her, or giving her little kisses throughout the rest of the performances.

"I really liked Wagon Wheel San. I think that was my favorite." Quinn stated after another act.

"It was ok. It would have been better on a ukulele."

"You can play a ukulele?"

"Pretty much anything with strings." Santana said nonchalantly. Brittany couldn't understand how this girl didn't think she was amazing. But saying something would just embarrass her so she just settled her head onto her shoulder and grasped her hand.

"Are you staying at my place tonight?" Santana whispered into her ear during the last singer of the night's set. Brittany nodded.

"Of course. But I think I'm staying at mine tomorrow. Rachel wants roommate nights on Monday and Thursday. Which I thought would be ok since you have night classes on those days." Santana cuddled into Brittany even closer. Happy that she had her for tonight but, as always, unhappy about the nights they would inevitably spend apart. But if there were roommate nights, does that mean she gets her for the rest of the five nights a week? She hoped anyway.

The drive home was spent talking about the other performers and how of course Santana was the best. But Santana mostly couldn't keep her eyes off of Brittany. Quinn knew that look. So as soon as they got inside, and Brittany and Santana hurried off to their room Quinn went into hers. Changed, put in her new noise canceling headphones, and tried resist the urge to show up at her own girlfriends dorm.

Friday morning Brittany wakes up and goes about her normal routine. Eat cereal. Get dressed. Check email. She only had one that wasn't junk mail today. It was from one of her dance professors asking if she could step into her office at some point today really quick. That made Brittany a little nervous. But she hadn't asked her to make an appointment so maybe it wasn't too serious. She hoped anyway. She thought she was doing really well in her dance classes so far. It was only the first week but she had a pretty good sense that these classes weren't going to be any harder than last semester.

After her morning dance class she stopped by the office suite. She saw her professor's door was closed and the secretary told her that she was on the phone and that she'd be off in a few minutes. So Brittany sat down to wait, she had some time. Just as she sat down a boy that she had never seen around the building before walked in. He was bulkier than most male dancers, tan, with a mohawk. "I don't know where this class is." He said handing a piece of paper to the woman behind the desk.

"Dance for non-majors meets in room 107 which is directly down the hall on your right sir. You passed it walking in."

"I probably did. I just don't really want to be here. Football coach is making me, says I need to learn a little grace." That explains it Brittany thought. The boy leaned over the desk. "Maybe we can work out a little arrangement. It's only an audit. I just need a signature that says I attended these classes. Maybe you could just sign this and then maybe I could do something for you." He flirted. Brittany almost laughed out loud. This guy was ridiculous.

"How about go to class." The secretary responded without pause. The mohawked boy turned around and saw Brittany sitting in her chair. She didn't like the way he checked her out so obviously. It made her feel a little gross.

"Name's Puck, sexy. And you are?" She saw her professor open up the door behind him and wave her in.

"Taken. Gross." She replied and walked into her professor's office.

"Shut the door Brittany." Brittany did as she was told.

"Did I do something wrong?" She blurted out. This felt an awful not like when she'd get pulled into the principal's office for failing yet another test. She didn't like it.

"What? No! Not at all. The opposite really. I wanted to offer you a job."

"Huh?" That wasn't what she was expecting at all.

"Well, we teach children's dance classes here on Saturday and Sunday mornings. Unfortunately the woman who was teaching the three to five year old movement classes is moving. That class is a lot like what we do in improv classes. Improv games, movement games. Things like that. I've noticed that you have a lot of patience in helping some of the other students when asked so I thought this would be a really good opportunity for you to make a little bit of money and start your teaching resume. What do you say?"

"I'd be teaching on my own?"

"You would. The current teacher will be there for another three weeks so you would get to assist her but then after she left you would be on your own. I have full confidence that you would be able to handle it though." Brittany smiled. That felt nice. To have her professor's full confidence. Even if it was in teaching little kids dance classes. "So are you interested?"

"Very." But then she thought about it for a half second. "Could I maybe run this by my tutor to make sure they don't think I'm overloading myself?"

"Absolutely. When do you see them next?"

"I can stop by just to ask them about this today."

"Well good. If we see you tomorrow then I'll assume you would like to be involved. I hope you do Brittany, I think that you would excel at teaching." She told her sincerely. Brittany thanked her and left the office to meet Santana for lunch. As she was walking out she saw the mohawked boy leaning against the wall. Puck or whatever.

"Shouldn't you be in class?" She scoffed as he caught sight of her.

"I wanted to apologize. You seemed offended in the office."

"I don't like being looked at like that. It's rude."

"I was just appreciating. No need to get mad." He chased after her as she continued walking quickly towards the exit.

"Appreciate someone else. I am already plenty appreciated."

"I thought all dancer dudes were gay."

"SHE is not a dancer. She is a musician." Brittany stopped and turned toward him. "Now please go."

"Ohhhh so that's why you weren't interested. I get it." Brittany rolled her eyes.

"Whatever. I'm leaving now. Go to class."

"I will see you around blondie." Brittany almost turned and yelled at him for calling her blondie but it wasn't worth it. So she kept walking, eager to meet Santana and tell her the good news she'd just gotten.

Santana was excited that Brittany was excited. Also glad that she would have a little bit of income. It made her nervous how little money Brittany had from her parents. What if something went wrong? Of course Santana would give her anything she needed or wanted but she could tell Brittany felt bad about taking it, when she didn't outright refuse.

Her tutor seemed to think it was an ok idea as well. That she shouldn't have to spend all day Saturday and Sunday studying if they were doing their job correctly. Brittany thought maybe she could stay with Santana that night to celebrate. She sent her a text.

To Santana: Soooo I got my first job today. That deserves celebrating doesn't it? Your place tonight? I have to be up kind of early for work but I miss you.  
From Santana: I have to log hours in the rehearsal room. But I'll call you when I'm done? I'll pick you up. Congratulations again babe.

Brittany decided she would go to the gym before going back to her room and showering. She sent Santana a text asking if she knew what time she would be done and got no reply. Against her own will she fell asleep at about eleven o'clock.  
Santana had played the same song a million times trying to get it completely perfect. She couldn't tell if she was there, or if it was terrible because she had heard it too many times. She checked her cell phone as she was signing out and saw that it was past midnight and she had a few missed texts from Brittany. She called to tell her she was done but Brittany didn't pick up. She drove to Brittany's dorm and called again, still no answer. She felt anger building. She had missed time with Brittany. Time she could have spent celebrating something that Brittany was proud of. She should have been there. She hit the steering wheel with the flat of her hand. She was half tempted to sneak up to Brittany's room but that was obsessive, and Brittany needed to sleep. She had a big day tomorrow. She called one last time. The voice mail picked up.

"Hey baby. I'm so sorry I took so long in the practice room. I feel terrible. I can take off all day tomorrow if you want to celebrate. Take you to dinner or something. Good luck tomorrow. Call me as soon as you're done to tell me how it goes. I love you so much Britt. Bye."

She waited a few minutes to see if Brittany would respond by chance but she didn't. So she went home and got into bed, determined to make it up to her.

The rest of January passed much like that. Santana losing track of time, and getting angry with herself for missing plans. Brittany tried to convince her that it was ok. That she understood. She was busy too with work (which was going wonderfully), class, and tutoring. Life was definitely easier than last semester. Tutoring really helped. The things they taught her about ways to focus really helped but not having to take notes and listen at the same time probably helped the most. So things were going good for her, and she tried to do her best to support Santana in any way that she could. She brought food to the practice room when Santana forgot to come to dinner, and spent a lot of evenings sprawled out with her books with ear plugs in on the floor of the practice room so Santana would know that she supported her, and that she was there for her.

The beginning of February came and Brittany had thought for certain the teacher would lay off of Santana by now. But that wasn't the case. She was spending more nights each week in her room because she would fall asleep before Santana finished. "Do you think you should tell another professor about what's going on?" Brittany asked one day at lunch.

"No B. I told you I just need to keep at it." Santana told her roughly.

"I just don't like seeing you so stressed."

"That's what this is. It's a stressful industry."

"Ok. Sorry." Santana knew she should apologize too. Brittany shouldn't apologize at all. She was just concerned and Santana shouldn't jump down her throat about it. That was uncalled for. But before she could get out the words to apologize Brittany changed the subject. "You know that Puck guy I told you about?"

"The asshole that hits on you and says inappropriate things?" Santana tried to keep the edge out of her voice.

"Yeah. Him. He wants to meet you. I think you'd actually like him. He's nice if you can get past the stupid things he says sometimes." Puck turned out to be the kind of person you can't help but like at least a little. Kind of like a puppy. She'd spent a lot of time in between classes talking to him and inadvertently learning to like him.

"Oh sure B. That's exactly what I want to do. Spend what little free time I have hanging out with the asshole that hits on my girlfriend. Absolutely." She didn't miss the flash of hurt on Brittany's face. She couldn't be angrier with herself than she was right now. Brittany didn't deserve this. She needed to get out of here and calm down. "I have to go. I'll call you after rehearsal. Love you." She kissed Brittany on the cheek and left.

Brittany tried not to get upset. She knew Santana was under stress and she knew that any anger that came at her wasn't about her. But it still hurt a little. She got rid of her garbage and left to go to her next class.

After class she still hadn't heard from Santana so she sent her a text just so she knew she was thinking about her.

To Santana: Back in my room. I'll be up late finishing homework so if you want me to come over tonight I can. Love you.  
She didn't get a response but she didn't exactly expect to either. Once she got back to her room she turned on her computer. She had wanted to buy the strap on for a while but hadn't exactly had the chance. Last week she had opened a bank account in town so she could deposit her checks from teaching. It made her laugh that her first purchase with her new debit card was a strap on and a bottle of lube from a sex toy store.  
Brittany had been working on homework for about an hour before her phone started ringing. She was sure it was Santana so she picked up without checking the caller ID.  
"Hey babe. You're done early."  
"Talking about that stupid slut of yours?" Brittany's breath caught. Why would her sister be calling?  
"What do you want Jen?"

"Can't a big sister just call her little sister to chat?"

"I'm sure some could. But you don't. Why are you calling me?"

"Tommy told me that you're dating someone. A girl."

"Yeah."

"You seriously left him for a girl? What the fuck are you thinking?"

"I didn't leave him for a girl. I hadn't been with him for months before I got together with her."

"Whatever. I'm just warning you if Mom and Dad find out they are going to flip their fucking shit. So I'd leave her quick if you want to stay in school on their money, and part of this family"

"I don't have to listen to this. How bad would it be for me really to not be in that family?" Brittany responded and hung up. She took a minute to compose herself. She went to dial Santana's number but thought better of it. She really needed to talk this through with someone but Santana was busy, and taking some of her time was only going to add more pressure to her and she didn't want to do that. She picked her phone up and rang another number.

"Hello?"

"Hey Sam. Can I come over, I need to talk?

"Yeah. Need me to pick you up?"

"No. I'll walk. I need a minute."

"Ok. See you soon."

"Bye."

She put her books in her bag and put her coat on before walking out of her dorm room. On her walk over to Sam's she thought about what her sister said. She doesn't understand. Her parents aren't particularly religious or anything. She guesses it has more to do with peoples opinion of them as a family than any real belief based in anything else.

When she gets to Sam's she tells him what happened. "I wish I had something constructive to say B. That's shit. I don't know what else to say. Your sister is a bitch."

"Yeah." She sarcastically laughs. "I'm not ashamed of her. I would tell them. It just hasn't come up."

"I know B. But maybe you shouldn't tell them. What if this all just breezes over?"

"I'm just so mad that they keep doing this to me. Why can't they either leave me alone, or just stop hating me? I don't get it." She was starting to move from mad to upset. "I just want them to not affect me anymore. I wish I could stop caring." Tears started to come now and Sam just wrapped his arm around her.

"It's hard. I know it sucks." He just rubs her back while she cries it out. "Do you want me to call Santana?"

"N-no. She's r-really busy. I'll tell her when she gets done with practice." Sam nodded and hugged her again.

"Movie?" Brittany sniffed and nodded yes. "Any preference?" She shook her head no. He shrugged and put Avatar in and sat on one end of the couch. Brittany was only watching for a few minutes before she started to fall asleep. It had been a hard day between Santana being upset and things with her sister. She just couldn't hold on any more.

Sam laid a blanket across Brittany after she fell asleep and went back to watching the movie. About an hour later he heard Brittany's phone vibrating on the table. He saw it was Santana so he picked it up.

"Hey S. It's Sam."

"Oh. Hey. Is Brittany there?"

"Yeah. She's asleep. She came over here pretty upset about some stuff with her sister. She can sleep here or I can bring her to your apartment or something?"

"I'm coming to get her. See you in a few." She hung up the phone and took the turn to Sam's place. Why hadn't Brittany called her? Did she really think she was that busy that she couldn't make time to help her? Did Brittany think she was actually mad at her? She pulled into his parking lot and ran up to Sam's apartment. When she knocked on the door he opened it pretty quickly. She gave him a half hearted hello as she moved quickly into the apartment to find Brittany.

She was asleep. Peaceful, beautiful. She brushed a hair out of her face. She pressed a kiss to her smooth forehead. Brittany's eyelashes fluttered against her cheeks before opening to reveal blue eyes. "San?"

"Hey baby. Want to go back to my place and go to bed? I could do with some cuddling." Brittany nodded before she stretched and got up.

"How did you know I was here?" She mumbled tiredly as she slipped her coat on and grabbed her bag.

"Sam told me."

"Thanks Sam." Sam nodded and hugged them both. The ride back was silent, as was getting ready for bed. Santana didn't want to push Brittany but she didn't want to go to sleep with anything bad between them.

"What happened today Britt?"

"My sister called." She answered as she climbed into bed under the covers. "Tommy told her about me and you. She said that my parents better not find out. She was being really mean."

"Why didn't you call me?"

"You were busy."

"I'm never too busy for you Britt. If you need me."

"I just didn't want to stress you out any more." Brittany said picking at the neckline of her tank top.

"You don't. Britt I'm really sorry about earlier. I shouldn't have talked to you like that."

"You're under a lot of pressure. I understand."

"It's not an excuse. There is no justifying ok? Just apologizing. I'm sorry. Do you forgive me?" Santana lifted her arm up and Brittany pressed her body into Santana's.

"Of course."

"Now. What do you think you should do about your sister?"

"I think she was just being a bitch. I think that as long as I am not ruining my parent's reputation they will just continue to ignore me. The other option is just to tell them about us. Which I would do, I'm not ashamed."

"I know you would B. But I think letting it pass over is the better option for now. I don't feel comfortable with you near them. And I know that they are still helping you pay for school." Brittany nodded, understanding what Santana was saying.  
"Can we let it go for tonight? Cuddle now, talk later if we still need to?" Santana pulled Brittany in tighter as a response.

Valentines day approached without either of them giving much thought to the day. Santana was getting ready to go to class the day before while Quinn was talking about her romantic plans with Rachel that reminded her that she had nothing planned with Brittany. At lunch that day she discovered that Brittany had also been working too hard to think about it. They decided they would go to a nice restaurant outside of town and then spend the night together.

They woke up together on Valentines Day and got ready for classes. Brittany could barely get Santana to get out of bed she was so tired. Today was one of the days they couldn't eat lunch together because their schedules didn't match up. One of Brittany's dance professors must have been in a particularly foul mood that day because she pushed them harder than she ever had.

She goes back to her dorm room after class hoping the shower would help loosen up her muscles. As soon as she gets in she notices Rachel is holding a dress up to each pair of shoes she has laid out on her desk. She's about to chime in her opinion when her phone rings.

"Hey babe."

"Hey B. Two things. One. Would you be terribly upset if we had a night in and did valentines day another night? I am so tired."

"No way. Dance class kicked my butt today. Pizza and movies?"

"Perfect. And two what brand of birth control shot do you use?"

"Uh. Don't know why?"

"I read an article today about a warning on some of the five year shots being faulty."

"Oh. No good. I can call my doctor tomorrow and double check."

"Ok. I'll try to remind you."

"In the meantime you still have some condoms right? Just in case."

"Yeah B." She laughed. "I gotta go. I'll pick you up after class ok? Love you."

"Love you too." She hangs up the phone and laughs. She really hoped it wasn't the shot that she had because she really didn't want to have to start using condoms with Santana.

Rachel, meanwhile, had only heard Brittany's half of that conversation. She tried not to listen. Eavesdropping was unbecoming. But she couldn't stop herself. Why would she need condoms? Where was she going tonight? She must have just misunderstood. Brittany came up behind her and pointed at the pair of shoes she thought would be best. "Where are you guys going tonight?" Brittany asked.

"It's a surprise. And then we were coming back here. You will be at Santana's tonight right?"

"Mhmm. Gonna go shower before San picks me up." She grabbed her stuff and went down to the shower. By time she got out and got dressed in comfy sweat pants Santana had texted her to tell her that she was outside. "Have fun Rach!" She said as she ran out the door leaving Rachel behind still a little confused and a little suspicious.

Quinn picked Rachel up just a few minutes later, thankful that Sam had let her borrow his car. Quinn could tell Rachel was distracted. "What's wrong?" Rachel shook her head. "Come on. I can tell something is wrong."

Rachel couldn't keep it in anymore. She hated thinking that Brittany might be cheating but if she was, Santana deserved to know. "I think Brittany is cheating on Santana." She blurted out.

"Wait. What? Why do you think that?" Quinn tried to keep her anger in check. There had to be an explanation.

"I heard Brittany talking to someone today about having condoms."

"Why does that mean she's cheating?" Quinn asked confused.

"Why would Brittany and Santana need condoms?" Oh. Quinn tried really hard not to laugh. Rachel didn't know. That explains a lot. She couldn't help but let a smile slip. "This isn't funny Quinn! This would crush Santana."

"It would. If it were true." She shook her head and pulled her phone out. "Hey San, are you guys at home? We're stopping by real quick." To her right Rachel was whispering 'no' over and over shaking her hands. "Yep be there soon."

"Quinn! I can't confront them about this! Oh sweet Barbara." Rachel started to breathe deeply to calm herself down.

"Calm down Rach. It will be ok. We're just going to clear everything up." They pulled up outside of their apartment and Quinn dragged a reluctant Rachel into the living room where Brittany and Santana were laying together watching Brave. "Go ahead Rach. Tell them what you told me."

"I. I. I."

"Spit it out hobbit."

"I think Brittany is cheating." She gasped out. Quinn laughed at the confused looks on both Santana and Brittany's faces.

"Tell them why." Quinn's ribs were hurting at the effort to contain the hysterical laughter that was threatening to bubble to the surface.

"I heard you talking to someone about having condoms." It took Brittany a few minutes to register what Rachel was talking about and then started to giggle.  
"Oh." Santana responded. "Oh. She doesn't know." She smacked Brittany's thigh to try and calm her laughter.

"Just tell her so we can clear this up and get on with date night." Quinn urged Santana.

"Sit down Rach." Brittany said, still giggling.

"So. I have, uh. Well a penis."

"You're a boy?" Santana sighed.

"No. Born girl just with a penis."

"And it works?" To this Brittany emphatically nodded.

"It definitely does." Brittany told her roommate. Quinn rolled her eyes while Santana looked away embarrassed.

"Can you get Brittany pregnant?"

"Obviously. Hence the condom question."

"Right." Rachel understood sort of. But she was still really confused. "So you've always had it?"

"Yeah."

"But you're a girl?"

"Yes hobbit we covered that."

"You've always been a girl?"

"Yes where are you going with this?"

"How did you know?"

Santana shrugs. "I just did. Since I can remember I've just known. I told my parents enough times that they took me seriously and started to look into things medically." Brittany was ready to step in that the first sign that Santana was uncomfortable in this conversation.

"Can I see it?"

"NO!" Brittany responded putting her hand over where Santana's penis was.

"Sorry. Just curious."

"I think you're going to be late if you don't leave." Brittany responded. Quinn laughed and took Rachel by the hand leading her out of the house. Santana chuckled.

"Jealous baby?" Santana asked kissing her gently.

"Mine." Brittany pouted kissing Santana back.

"Yours."

When Quinn got back early the next morning it was to a half eaten pizza on the coffee table, the DVD menu still playing (although muted) and Santana and Brittany curled up together on the couch still passed out. She was pretty sure there would never be any cheating here.

When March finally hit Brittany was hopeful for spring. But more than spring she wanted Spring break. A whole week with Santana. They had barely spent any time together alone. And when they had, they were both so exhausted that they carried on stunted conversations and mostly just fell asleep. Their sex lives definitely suffered. It had turned out that Brittany's birth control was fine, which was good because neither of them loved the idea of condoms. But still, even with the good news, finding time and energy was definitely a problem.

Santana called Brittany as she was walking to the dining hall to tell her that she would have to skip lunch with her because she had a meeting with the asshole professor that clearly didn't like her. Which just made Brittany hate this professor even more. She grabbed a sandwich and headed to the Library thinking she might as well use the time to catch up on homework.

About an hour later her phone started to buzz again. She picked it up and heard a very sad sniff. "San?"

"Britt. He" sniff "said I'm not trying hard enough. That I-I clearly don't want this." Brittany wanted to yell. Tell her that she needed to go back down there and give him every bit of attitude she had. But she knew that wouldn't work.

"You have one more class today?"

"Mhmm. I can't s-skip it." The sadness in Santana's voice was breaking her heart.  
"Ok. Then come straight back to the apartment. I'm making you dinner. We're having a night to ourselves. Ok?"

"O-ok. I need that."

"Ok baby. Come back to me as soon as you're done. I love you." She said as gently as she could.

"I love you too B. So much." They both hung up and Brittany sprung into action. She didn't love skipping classes but this was kind of necessary, and the first time she would have missed this class this semester. She went back to her room and grabbed a few things, then headed in the direction of Santana's apartment. She stopped at a small store to grab a few things on the way.

It took some effort but she remembered the macaroni and cheese recipe. She had also managed to time it correctly so that it was finishing just as Santana shuffled into the apartment. She took one look at the table, set with a candle and two plates. "B what's all this?" She smiled at Brittany who was pulling the cover off of something she had just pulled out of the oven.

"I made you dinner." Brittany was filling two cups with juice and bringing them over to the table.

"Can I help you?"

"Nope. Sit down." Brittany pulled her chair out for her and gestured for her to sit down. She kissed her cheek as she as she went into the kitchen with the two plates and filled them with food. She brought them both back over to the table and sat down putting Santana's plate in front of her, and then sitting down with her own plate. "I hope you like it." She waited for Santana to take a bite so she could see her reaction.

"This is amazing Britt! Kind of glad I had to skip lunch now." She smiled at Brittany who was looking at her with such a loving expression that all of the bad things of the day started to slip away. They ate and laughed. Brittany getting up to refill Santana's cup even though Santana insisted she could do it on her own. "I'm surprised Quinn hasn't come home."

"She's not going to. I called her and asked her to stay with Rachel tonight. She's already been by to get her stuff."

"Oh yeah? Why's that." Brittany started clearing things off of the table.

"I'd like to try something new tonight. Something we talked about over Christmas break." It only took Santana a half second to realize what Brittany was talking about. She gulped.

"Are you sure B?"

"As long as you're up to it." Santana nodded. She was nervous but if Brittany was willing, then she wanted to do this. "Why don't you go jump in the shower while I finish cleaning up and then I'll join you." Santana nodded and got up from the table. She walked over to Brittany and kissed her deeply before walking back towards the bathroom to prepare and shower for what was going to happen.

Brittany quickly put the leftover macaroni and cheese in the fridge before hurrying to the bedroom. She pulled the comforter off the bed and laid a towel down. Next to the towel she put the new bottle of lube, strap on and harness. Then she stripped out of her own clothes and went into the bathroom.

Santana heard her coming in and finished rinsing the soap off of herself as Brittany got in. "Want me to wash your hair?" Santana asked.

"Nope. I already showered I just wanted to be in here with you for a few minutes." She responded pushing Santana into the wall of the shower and then pressing their bodies together. She kissed her gently at first, but quickly began deepening it. "You're not too tired are you?"

"No. Not tired." Santana mumbled as she reconnected their lips. She gasped as she felt Brittany's and gently close around her quickly hardening shaft. Once Santana was completely hard and her slit was dripping precum Brittany let go and separated from Santana who whimpered at the loss of Brittany's body against her own. She turned the water off and took Santana's hand and led her out of the shower grabbing a towel and carefully drying Santana's body with reverence. When she was satisfied she led her down the hall towards her room.

When they got into Santana's room Brittany reattached their lips and began backing Santana backwards to the bed. When the back of her legs hit the edge of the bed she sat down slowly, their lips never parting. Brittany straddled her, and urged her backwards so Santana would be lying on the towel with her head on the pillows. "What do I-" Santana began to ask. Unsure of how this was going to work.

"Just lay on your back. Get comfortable." Santana did and Brittany leaned down and began kissing her again. Taking her slightly softer dick and pumping it a few times.  
"W-what about you?"

"Let me take care of you Santana." Santana nodded and let Brittany continue kissing down the column of her neck and onto her collar bone. She kissed over the swell of Santana's breast before taking a nipple gently into her mouth. She paid similar attention to the other. Continuing to stroke her gently the whole time. Once Santana began panting and pressing herself harder into Brittany's hands and mouth. "Are you ready?" Brittany whispered to Santana who just nodded in response.

Brittany reached down and slipped the harness on preemptively so she wouldn't have to stop later and do it. Then she grabbed the bottle of lube and squirted a generous amount onto her finger. She used her other hand to spread Santana's legs even further. She reached under her heavy balls and ran her lubed finger over the tight hole. Santana gasped at the foreign feeling, but couldn't deny that it felt good. Brittany circled her hole before pressing her finger against it just slightly, and then pressing in just a tiny bit. "Is this ok?"

"Uh huh" Santana gasped.

"You'll tell me to stop if it hurts right?" Santana nods and Brittany presses further just a little more so that she's in up to her first knuckle. Then she started to move her finger in and out just a little bit. It felt strange at first, Santana thought, but quickly it started to feel good.

"More." Brittany obliged by pressing further in on each little thrust of her finger. She paid close attention to Santana's face watching for any sign of discomfort. While she knew this was for Santana she couldn't deny that the feeling of being inside her was definitely turning her on. After a few moments she was pushing and pulling her entire finger in and out and thought maybe she would be ready for more.

"I'm going to put another finger in ok?" Santana nodded. Trying to keep her breathing regular. Brittany added more lube and started to push the tips of both fingers into Santana.

"M-more please" Brittany eased her two fingers in further, a little faster than the first time. When she slipped both fingers all the way in she felt Santana gasp.

"Are you ok?"

"Hold still. Just a sec." Santana grunted. Brittany nodded and leaned up and kissed the insides of Santana's thigh while she got used to the feeling of Brittany's fingers stretching her. "Ok go." Brittany started to pull her fingers out very slowly, and then press them back in. The more she did it the looser Santana got. Once she felt like Santana was relaxed and feeling only pleasure, she started to scissor her fingers a little bit trying to stretch her just a little more. "Britt. Amazing." Santana grunted.

"Ready for more?" Brittany asked. Santana grunted out a yes so without removing her fingers Brittany attached the small pink glittery dildo to the harness and coated it with a generous amount of lube. She pulled her fingers out and then spread more lube onto Santana. She leaned forward onto her knees and lined the head of the dildo up with Santana. She pressed forward until the head slid in. Santana's eyes closed and she hissed in pain. "Stop? San do you want me to stop?" She shook her head no but Brittany held still until she received a sign to keep going from Santana.

"Keep going." Santana whispered after a few seconds of adjusting. Brittany pressed her hips slowly stopping a few more times when Santana's and tightened around her arm. But eventually with very careful movements, she felt her hips press tightly against Santana.

"I'm all the way in baby." She leaned forward so she was hovering over Santana and could press their lips together. They kissed for a few seconds before Brittany felt Santana's hips moving. She matched the movement with her own hips, pulling out slightly and pushing back in. Santana buried her face into Brittany's neck as she kept thrusting.

Brittany pulled back a little bit to look into Santana's face. "Feels so good B." Brittany increased her pace and force just slightly. She leaned back more so she could watch the dildo going in and out of Santana, the sight turned her on more than she had ever expected. She noticed that Santana's dick was extremely hard and leaking large amounts of precum. She grasped it firmly in her hand and started to stroke up and down the way she knew Santana liked. "Fuck. B don't stop." Brittany kept going, increasing her speed a little.

She saw the muscles in Santana's stomach tense up, a sure sign that she was about to cum. She thrust into her a few more times, while increasing the speed of her hand and in just a few more strokes Santana exploded all over her own stomach with a scream. "Britt. Uh. God" After she had milked the last few drops out of cum out of Santana she gently pulled out and quickly unhooked the harness tossing it to the floor before falling to the side of Santana and pulling her into her arms.

It took several minutes for Santana to regain her breath. "That was intense." She finally mumbled. Brittany squeezed her tighter. "I can't believe you did that for me."  
"I would do absolutely anything for you. Plus, I liked it too."

"You did?" Brittany nodded before kissing Santana's forehead. "I think I need another shower." She noted as she felt the stickiness coating her stomach and now Brittany's too.

"How about a bath together?"

"That sounds amazing." Brittany untangled her limbs from Santana and got up, reaching her hand out for Santana's. Once Santana was fully standing she could feel there would be some definite soreness in the morning.

"You ok?"

"Just a good kind of sore." Santana replied as they walked naked towards the bathroom. Brittany ran the bath putting in some lavender bubbles she had bought and got in leaning against the back wall of the tub with her legs spread, gesturing for Santana to get in.

Once she was in and settled with her back against Brittany's chest and Brittany's legs tangled with hers she let herself melt into Brittany. "I love you so much. Tonight has been wonderful. Thank you."

"Always Santana. I love you too. Did it feel good?"

"Amazing. Exactly how I thought it would be. I loved having you inside of me."  
"Would you want to do it again?"

"Yeah. Not all the time or anything. But sometimes."

"Good. I'd like to do it again. But I agree, not all the time. I'd miss having you inside of me too." Brittany kissed her neck and giving her a squeeze.

"Me too. That's my second favorite thing ever."

"Where's your first?"

"It's lame."

"Just tell me San."

"Cuddling. Just lying with you. I love that the most."

"I love that the most too." Brittany sighed into Santana's hair as she kissed there.  
"So. For spring break" Santana started "I was thinking maybe we spend a few days here. Get some alone time in since this semester has been so rough on us. Then we can go to my parents. They won't be there, they're taking their vacation to see some family in Puerto Rico, but we can see my brothers and maybe go into the city a few times. Sound good? Did you want to do something different?"

"Spend time alone with you and then spend more time alone with you in New York City. That sounds pretty amazing."

"Good. Now we just need to survive till then." Santana sighed.

"I think we will be ok. We'll take care of each other." Santana let her head rest back against Brittany's chest and let the warm water and the arms of the woman she loved lull her into a state of comfort that she knows she'll only ever have with Brittany.

* * *

**AN:** What did you guys think?

Thanks as always to my beta. She's the best.


	19. Chapter 19

**Potential Trigger warnings**: (Mostly mild) See bottom of the chapter if you are concerned. I don't want to give anything away.

* * *

Mandatory roommate nights were great. In theory. But nights like this, when Brittany just wants Santana (in so many ways), they feel like torture. But Rachel is talking about how much she's going to miss her and Quinn but she is here. So Brittany should be here too. It's not like she's even planning on spending time away from Santana over break. So one night won't kill her. At least she hopes. But tonight is one of the rare nights that Santana had no patience for practicing so she was home. Probably doing something else productive, but they could be doing other things. Like each other.

Santana had texted her earlier that night to ask if she wanted to come over because she was over the piano for now. Brittany hated reminding her of the whole roommate night thing. So here they were, texting back and forth while Brittany and Rachel packed for the upcoming week.

From Santana: How's laundry?

To Santana: One more load. You need to do laundry too.

From Santana: I know. I know. I'm running out of clothes.

To Santana: Good thing you'll be wearing a lot of nothing this next week.

From Santana: Babe you can't say stuff like that if you're not coming over.

Brittany laughed and Rachel looked at her like she was a little crazy till she saw the phone in her hand and shook her head. "The ever charming Santana Lopez I take it?" Brittany sensed her sarcasm.

"She is charming Rach. You'll miss each other this week. I know it."

"I'm sure I won't miss having my stature commented on so frequently. Does she know she's only maybe two inches taller than me?"

"Three I think. But whatever. You're both short. I'll miss you."

"I'll miss you too Brittany. My fathers are sad that you won't be coming home with me."

"I know. Soon though. Did you tell them I said thank you for that letter they sent me? It was really nice." Rachel nods. Rachel's fathers made the habit of sending her hand written letters every once in awhile because Rachel liked to get mail. And on this last batch, they had sent Brittany one too. "Santana and I just need some alone time. We've both been too busy." Rachel was going to ask what their plans were but thought better of it. She probably already knows really.

The two went about their packing and texting their respective girlfriends in relative silence. When they were done they put in Lilo and Stitch, made some popcorn, and settled in for the night. After the movie was over and she had crawled into her own bed wearing one of Santana's hoodies, she thought about how it would be, after college, when she and Santana got to live together. No more nights away. Every night would be roommate night. Until then though, they would just have to deal with nights apart. Even if neither of them liked it.

The next afternoon she decided halfway through her second class of the day that her dedication to attending all her classes the day before spring break started was ridiculous. Only half the class showed up and nobody was focused. Everybody was talking about vacations or the parties they were throwing. Brittany thought that spending the entire week in bed with Santana sounded better than all of that. She knew they would at least have to drive up to the city, but even then they had the house to themselves. Unless Santana's brothers decided to stay. That would be awful. No. Not awful. Wrong word. Inconvenient.

Brittany shows up to her last class of the day, which lasts about five minutes before the professor dismisses them. She sends Santana a quick text telling her she was back to her room early getting her stuff ready and to pick her up when she was done with class. Half an hour later she got a text back. Apparently Santana had gotten out a little early too and was on her way. Brittany dragged her stuff downstairs to wait. Not for long though.

"Hey there sexy. Want a ride?"

"On you? Sure." Brittany winked. Santana hadn't been expecting that response and gulped.

"Dinner first?"

Brittany feigned annoyance. "If you insist." But couldn't hold the charade up any longer and threw her arms around Santana. "Missed you last night." She whispers as she kisses her cheek.

"Missed you too B. Any requests for dinner?"

"Indian?" Santana makes a noise of confirmation as she loads Brittany's bag into the back seat. She was proud that she was able to help reshape Brittany's food tastes. She was now a firm believer that burgers and French fries weren't always the answer. Maybe just sometimes.

"So I have a plan suggestion for us tonight if you're interested."

"A sexy time plan suggestion?" Santana laughed. Brittany was clearly very focused on this.

"No, unfortunately." Brittany pouted. "I just figured since some of our friends are still around till tomorrow, and we haven't hung out with them a lot recently, maybe we could do that. But if you want to stay home alone I'm definitely down with that." While Brittany did want to stay home alone, Santana was right. They had been ignoring their friends any time they had available free time together.

"No let's hang out with friends. We have a whole week. Movie night or something?"

"Well, one of Sam's friends invited him to a party, told him to bring people if he wanted. So I thought maybe that?"

"Dancing?"

"Of course."

"I'm in." Brittany didn't hesitate. She loved to dance. Obviously, since that's what she was hoping to do with her life, but beyond that, she loved to dance casually. She especially loved to dance with Santana.

After they ate, they went back to Santana's apartment. While she was hanging up some stuff in the closet Brittany noticed Santana yawning a lot. "Tired?"

"I couldn't stay asleep last night."

"Let's take a nap before the party then."

"Are you tired?"

"No. But I want to cuddle so you might as well nap while we do. Get in bed I'll be there in a second." Santana pulls off her pants and shirt and climbs into bed waiting for Brittany. The second her head hit the pillow though, she started to drift off. She felt the bed dip as Brittany climbed in and formed her body around Santana's, tangling their legs together and putting her arm around her, holding her tight. "I'll wake you up in a little while. I love you."

Santana mumbled something back that Brittany assumed was I love you before she fell asleep. Brittany waited till Santana's breath had become slow and even before moving her arm to reach around her and grab her phone so she could keep an eye on the time. She loved holding Santana. It was slightly more often the other way around, that Santana would want to hold Brittany. And she loved both, but something about laying awake with a sleeping Santana in her arms made her feel extra happy right now.

She figured she could let Santana sleep for about an hour, so a few minutes before that hour was up she started the process of waking her. Santana was not the easiest person to wake up. But Brittany knew a few tricks. Like if she rubbed her hand over Santana's stomach and kissed her shoulders and back, Santana would wake up happy. Alarms meant she woke up crabby. So Brittany opted to go with option A.

Santana felt Brittany waking her up and turned around in her arms and buried her face in Brittany's chest. "Wake up baby." Brittany whispered into her ear. Santana smiled but shook her head no. "Hmm. Wonder what would wake you up." Brittany jokingly pondered.

"Kisses." Santana whispered and leaned her head up, eyes still closed, with her lips pouted. Brittany laughed and pressed her lips firmly to Santana's. "Ok I'm up now." She made no attempts to actually get up though. "What time is it?"

"A little past eight. Sam is picking us up at ten right?"

"Mhmm. Don't want to get up. So comfy."

"But we have to. You said we could go dance." Brittany started to prod her in places that she knew Santana was ticklish.

"No tickling! I'm getting up!" After a few more kisses they did manage to get up and get into the shower.

Two hours later they were sat in the living room with Quinn dressed up and ready to go. Quinn was being even more quiet than usual because she missed Rachel. Brittany made her promise that she will try to have fun tonight even if she does text Rachel the entire time. Sam calls a few minutes later saying he and Mercedes are outside.

When they get to the party it was bigger than Santana had expected. She had assumed most of the people would be gone for spring break. But this place was wall to wall people. She felt Brittany's body tense next to hers and the grip on her hand tighten. "It's crazy in here." Brittany nodded. "We don't have to stay if you don't want." Brittany thought about it for a few minutes.

"No. It's fine. I want to dance." Santana began leading her through the people to where the music was coming from. She suspected, at one point this was a living room but it had been cleared out and was now a makeshift dance floor.

"You girls want anything to drink?" Sam asked.

"No, I'm good." Santana relied at the same time as Brittany said.

"Not drinking tonight. Thanks Sammy." Brittany tugged Santana's hand and they made their way to an open space on the dance floor as Mercedes, Quinn, and Sam walked off towards the kitchen.

About half an hour later Sam comes to find them. "Hey guys. Mercedes isn't feeling well so I'm going to take her home. Quinn is heading out with us. Do you guys want to stay?"

"I'm having fun dancing." Brittany tells Santana.

"We'll stay."

"Ok. Call me when you leave and I'll drive you home. Ok?" They both nod in response and Sam walks away.

They definitely lost track of how long they had been there. Dancing a little while longer had turned into hours of dancing and Santana's compression shorts feeling awfully tight. Their bodies were slick with sweat and Santana could see Brittany's face was flushed. Beyond both being turned on, it was also way too hot inside.

"I'm ready to go whenever you are." Brittany spoke into Santana's ear in between songs.

"Yeah. Let's go." Santana pulled Brittany through the crowd glaring at several boys she caught staring either at herself, or Brittany, and finally broke through the mass of people when they got to the front door. They grabbed their coats off of the pile of them and headed outside.

"It's so much nicer out here." Brittany sighed once the cool air had hit her.

"I know." They took a second to cool down. "Should I call Sam?"

"You could. Or we could walk. It's not super far, and it's really nice."

"Sure. Let's walk." They clasped hands and walked down the street in the direction of Santana's apartment. A few blocks away, Brittany's body temperature had returned to normal and she realized it was actually kind of cold out. The wind was blowing kind of hard and she wished they had called Sam.

Then they felt a few rain drops. Nothing much. Enough to annoy Santana. The walk was further than she had originally thought. They were still a little over a mile away and her heels were starting to hurt her feet. But when it started to rain, like really rain, that made her decision for her. She grabbed Brittany's hand and pulled her into a little side street and under the awning of an Italian restaurant.

"W-why did we s-stop?" Brittany's teeth chattered as she spoke.

"Because your lips are blue. I'm freezing. And now it's raining." She pulled her phone out and dialed Sam's phone. She pressed herself against Brittany's body and Brittany buried her cold face into Santana's neck.

Brittany breathed against the warm skin she found there, breathing in the gentle scent of Santana's perfume and just her. "Hey Sammy boy. Can you come get us? We were going to walk home but it started raining."

"Yep where are you guys?"

"By Luigi's."

"Cool. I'll be there as soon as I get some pants on."

"Gross Sam. We didn't mean to interrupt."

"You didn't. 'Cedes puked on me. I think she ate something bad."

"Also gross. See you soon. Thanks again."

"No prob. Be there soon." Santana hung up the phone and put her arms around Brittany and flipped her around so her back was pressed against the wall. She let out a little squeal in surprise as she feels Santana's arms brace on either side of her.

"Let me warm you up a little." Santana whispered and pressed lips to Brittany's.

Brittany whimpered when Santana pulled away. "Mmmmm. More." Santana obliged and kissed her again.

"Look what we fuckin have here." A voice slurred behind Santana. She saw Brittany's eyes go wide before she spun around standing in front of Brittany. Instinctually blocking whoever it was off from Brittany. "What the hell is this? Some fuckin dykes?"

"Fuck off asshole. Go back to the cave you came from." She's all bluster. She can't fight these guys. There were two of them and they were big guys. Hopefully they'll be assholes and then walk away. The smaller of the two guys took a step closer towards them and Santana felt Brittany's hand tighten on her bicep. She wanted to reassure Brittany. But she couldn't turn her back. The guy kept walking towards them. Stumbling.

"Why don't you ladies come home with us?"

"Fuck. Off. Leave us alone!" Santana yelled again. Brittany could feel Santana's muscles under her hand were locked up. She was scared and that was making Brittany more afraid. The guy just took a few steps closer so he was right in front of them. He reached out towards Santana's face and she slapped his hand away, but he caught it. He held her wrist roughly in his hand and then jerked her away from Brittany. She tried to hold onto Santana but he was too strong and she only had one hand clung to her coat.

The guy whipped Santana backwards behind him and into the arms of the other guy. She felt a pop in her shoulder followed by a shock of pain that she had to ignore. "Hold her." He growled. The guy locked his arms around Santana's, behind her back. She fought and kicked and screamed but he wouldn't let go. The first guy took a few steps closer to Brittany.

"Brittany run!" Santana didn't know what else to do to protect her other than to get her to leave as fast as she could. But Brittany didn't leave, she wouldn't even if she was capable. But right now she was frozen with fear. She knows the look in his eyes. The way he's looking at her. That's the way someone looks when they're going to take what they want, no matter what.

He goes to grab her and she unfreezes and swings at him, scratching his face. She saw blood droplets forming in the half second that everything stopped. Then he took another step closer so he was pressed up against her. "You fucking bitch!" She can smell the alcohol on his breath. Then she did the only thing she could think of. Brittany kicked him as hard as she could in the balls. She looked over her shoulder to make sure that Santana was still ok. She was still struggling with the man holding her back, but she could tell that he wasn't going to be able to hold her back much longer.

Brittany refocused on the man in front of her again. She had injured him, and now she thought maybe if she could just push him off of her, she could push that other man holding Santana and they could run. Before she was able to make her body catch up with her brain though, the man pressed against her reached up and grabbed a handful of her hair. She screamed as she felt him pull her head forward, then violently push back. Her world went black.

Santana saw it happening. She saw Brittany struggle against him and for a second, she thought Brittany would get away. Then she saw Brittany hesitate, and that guy slam her head off of the wall. It happened in slow motion. Brittany's body crumpled to the ground and for a minute, Santana stopped struggling. She wanted Brittany to move again. She wanted anything to happen that might indicate that Brittany was fine. But nothing. Nothing except the sticky red fluid she saw coating her blonde hair. Santana found her fight again and started doing anything she could to get out of his grasp to get to Brittany.

"Yo! Did you kill her?! We gotta go bro. Someone is gonna hear this bitch."

"She's not dead." He took a step towards Brittany's motionless body. "We're not leaving till I get some of this." He crouched down and started to push his hand up Brittany's skirt. Santana lost it. Out of instinct or something else she fell to her knees making the man loosen his grip on her. She pulled away and bolted toward Brittany. The man's hand was high on her thigh when Santana's fist connected with the side of his face. "Fucking bitch!" He got up and swung at Santana catching her just off center of her stomach, low on her ribs. The breath rushes out of her body and she buckles with the effort of trying to drag any air into her lungs. She tries pushing herself up but her arm feels like it's not working. She's struggling.

The man bends down just feet from her, looks her in the eye, and starts to lift Brittany's skirt again. Santana flings herself at him and knocks him off balance, knocking him to the ground. Santana crawls over to Brittany just as the man is getting back up.

"Dude I see headlights we need to fucking go." The guy is still walking toward them so Santana does the only thing she can and lays herself across Brittany covering as much of her body as she can. Santana sees the lights now too but the man keeps coming closer. She watches him pull his foot back, aiming right for her face. She braces herself for the impact but instead she feels Brittany's body take it right in the ribs. She hears a sickening crack. Her eyes snap open and she sees somebody chasing the guys up the street towards another main road.

"Brittany? Baby? Can you hear me?" Santana sniffed back tears. She was afraid to touch her. She didn't know where she was hurt. He had hurt her everywhere. There was so much blood. She wanted to move her head out of the blood but she was afraid she'd make it worse. "Brittany please wake up." She cried out. She could feel the rain on the back of her neck. She was distantly aware that she was also in pain but it was nothing compared to the fear that was threatening to split her body in half.

The second he pulled up his heart was in his throat. All he could see was some guy walking toward Santana who was trying to protect Brittany who was on the ground. He jumped out of the car without even shutting the doors and bolted after them. Not before one of them kicked either Brittany or Santana. He couldn't tell. He chased them up the alley but they were too far away and he needed to call for help. Brittany hadn't been moving. On his way back he called 911 and told them where they were. They asked if Brittany was breathing. He called to Santana to ask but didn't get an answer.

Santana was vaguely aware that there was someone nearby. She was still trying to will Brittany to wake up. She had taken her hand now and was squeezing it gently hoping for any response when she saw some out of her periphery approach them. "Get the fuck away!" She growled covering Brittany again.

"San it's me. I just need to feel for a pulse." He reached again but Santana smacked his hand away. She knew logically that Sam wasn't going to hurt them. She knew that. But she couldn't stop protecting Brittany. "I can see her chest going up and down." She heard him say into the phone. Why hadn't she thought of that? She put her hand on Brittany's chest and felt her lungs expand, albeit shallowly, but still. Brittany was breathing. Which meant Brittany was not dead. She put her cold cheek close to Brittany's nose and felt the air puff against her. Breathing. Not dead.

She watched the rain pool in the corner of Brittany's eyes and mouth. Brittany was breathing and she needed to get her out of the rain but she couldn't move her. She took her coat off and tried to hold it over Brittany's head but part of it kept falling over her face. Her body tensed when Sam kneeled on the other side of her. "I'm just helping you Santana. I won't touch her. I promise." He picked up the other corners of the coat and held it over Brittany's head. Santana took her finger and brushed the water away from her eyes. It ran down like tear drops.

She heard the sirens before she saw them. She heard them get louder and then pull up and shut off. She looked up and noticed that a few people had gathered. Where were these people when they were hurting Brittany? Why had they been all alone then but now people stood around watching them like animals in the zoo. She felt like everyone was closing in on her. She crouched over Brittany again, protective instincts taking over.

Sam saw the shift. The second Santana took her eyes off of Brittany she became unsettled. When the paramedics came closer and reached for Brittany without warning Santana she tried to push them away from her. He hated that he had to do it but he grabbed her around the middle and pulled her away from Brittany, making sure to keep her close enough so that she could still see Brittany and what was being done to her. "Santana calm down they are helping her!" She continued to struggle against him and he just held her tighter until he felt her body give in and she just started to sob. "Shhh. It's ok. She's going to be ok."

When they started to load Brittany on the stretcher into the ambulance Santana started to panic again. She pulled Sam over to where the paramedics were and tried to follow them into the ambulance but was stopped. "Ma'am you need to let us take care of your friend. You can meet us at the hospital."

"But" She yelled before they closed the doors. She turned and looked at Sam, eyes wide. Her mouth opening and closing like she needed to say something but couldn't. The words were stuck. She was shaking. Sam could tell she was soaking wet and her coat was over on the concrete. He quickly ran and picked it up and brought it over to Santana and then ushered her to his car. "I need to- where- I just- Sam?" She broke again. "I was supposed to take care of her. I am. Supposed to."

"I'm taking you to the hospital that they just took Brittany to. And then we'll wait until they let us see her ok?" Santana's head slumped forward, which was enough recognition that she understood.

Even with the heat on as high as he could get it, the drive just wasn't long enough for Santana to dry or stop shaking. He wasn't sure that the shaking was just from the cold anyway. And he couldn't help any of the other reasons right now. When they got to the hospital Santana had jumped out of the car before he was even completely parked. By time he finally caught up with her she was already at the nurses station begging for information on Brittany.

"They brought her in, and she's now being looked at. I can't tell you anything unfortunately, since you aren't family. We are contacting her emergency contacts. If you wait in the waiting room someone will come by and let you know how she is." The nurse was distant. This was just her job. Santana walked towards the waiting room and sat down. She couldn't stop her mind from racing. Replaying what had happened. Jumping to the worst case scenario with Brittany. Sam just kept a constant eye on her. She was staring, eyes fixed at the floor. And occasional shudder would pass through her. Other than that she was largely unresponsive.

About an hour after they had got there a nurse came over. Santana jumped up ready to interrogate her. "I don't know anything about your friend. But you're scaring other people in the waiting room." Santana looked genuinely confused. "You're wet, dirty, and covered in mud. And I can tell by the way you're holding your arm that you're hurt."

"I'm fine. I need to wait here for Brittany."

"And then scare her when you do see her? I'll give you two options. One, you can come back with me. Get checked out, we'll fix you up. And then you can get cleaned up. Or two, you can leave. Those are your options." Santana's breathing quickens and Sam can see the panic in her eyes.

"It's going to be a while San. They said that. Go get checked out now so you don't have to leave her when she does wake up." Santana's gaze shifts back and forth between the two for a few seconds before she nods in agreement. Sam breathes a sigh of relief as Santana walks away. Glad that for at least a little bit she'll be distracted. A thought occurred to him and he ran out to his car. In his trunk he had a pair of sweatpants and a t-shirt that had gotten left in Mercedes laundry and she had washed for him. He'd never taken them into his apartment. He pulled them out and brought them to the nurse's station. "Can you give these to my friend Santana to put on after she gets cleaned up?"

They checked her over as soon as she walked back. The doctor said that her shoulder was dislocated. That made sense. It's happened to her before in cheerleading. She was having a hard time focusing on the words they were saying. She tried. She knew it was important. But right now the most important thing in her world was in a room, maybe still unconscious, with a bunch of strangers, hurt. After the initial pain of having her shoulder reset, it started to feel better immediately. She refused pain medicine. She needed to be as clear as she could when she got to see Brittany.

The nurse handed her some clothes that she instantly recognized as Sam's and showed her to a room with a shower in it. She got in and rinsed off quickly, not bothering with soap. She threw on the warm, dry clothes and went back out. The nurse made sure her sling was on correctly before letting her go back out to the waiting room. Sam stood up as soon as he saw her walking towards him. "Bruised rib and a dislocated shoulder. I'm fine. Any news on Brittany?" Sam was glad to hear that she seemed to be thinking more clearly at least.

"Not yet." Santana nodded and sat back down in her seat.

Santana had read the same line on a poster in front of for the thousandth time when she heard her name being called. She looked in the direction of the voice and saw Quinn running towards them. Santana got up and let Quinn hug her gently. "Are you ok? Did you hear any news about Brittany?"

"No. And I'm fine." Quinn sat down on the other side of her.

"I brought you some clothes. Here's a hoodie. And some shoes so you can take off your heels. I brought some for Britt too. I just didn't know-"

"Thank you." Santana said quietly, as she slipped off her heels and put on flats. She sat back up and leaned her head on Quinn's shoulder. She was grateful that she was here, but she didn't know what else to say.

"Have you called her parents?" Quinn was going through a checklist in her head of things they could be doing right now. Quinn needed the action to get through things that were hard for her to deal with sometimes.

"No. I can't talk to them right now."

"Did you call your parents?" Santana shook her head. She should. She knows.

"I don't want to call them unless I know what's going on." Quinn understood. Not knowing was difficult. She couldn't imagine being Santana right now.

A few minutes later two police officers come in asking for her. She stands up to indicate that she is Santana Lopez, the person they are looking for. "We're sorry to bother you ma'am. But we need to ask you to tell us what happened tonight." Santana took a deep breath and recalled the story with as much detail as she could. It hadn't even occurred to her that the police might want to talk to her. After talking to her, Sam told his version which was much shorter. Quinn, who hadn't heard the whole story yet, became increasingly more upset with the details she was hearing.

"The doctors have collected a DNA sample from under Brittany's nails which should help us identify the attacker." Santana nodded, expecting them to go away now but they didn't. They just sat back in the seats.

"Do you need something else?" It came out a little more harsh than she had intended.

"We need to get a statement from Ms. Pierce when she wakes up. The doctors said they weren't sure how long that would be so we figured we would wait unless something came up. She doesn't have any family here to make sure that she talks to us when she's ready so we are just going to wait it out."

"I'm her family. I mean I'm her girlfriend. And I'm not leaving unless she's leaving with me. So if I promise to make sure she calls you before we leave here, could you maybe not question her as soon as she wakes up?" She tried to be as polite as possible. She just didn't want Brittany to have to deal with that after everything else she had gone through. The police officer studied her for a minute, perhaps gauging her honesty.

"I think that would be ok Ms. Lopez. We'll stop back in the morning but if she gets discharged before we come back, you make sure to call us. We want to talk to her before she leaves this hospital. Ok?" Santana nods and the police officers get up. The one that had been talking to her hands her his card and they head back out of the hospital.

It was either very late, or very early when the doctor came out with news about Brittany. Or, it wasn't news really. But it was something. "We are still having a hard time getting a hold of her emergency contacts so I still can't tell you much. They are getting her cleaned up and she isn't awake yet."

"But she's ok? Please just tell me that she is going to be ok?" The doctor hesitates, looking into Santana's scared eyes.

"She should be fine miss." The doctor turned around and walked back down the hall and Santana slumped back into her seat.

"She's going to be ok San. That's good news." Quinn tried.

"Yeah. But what happens when she wakes up in that room alone? She's going to be fucking terrified." Nobody had any response to that because she was right. Brittany would be.

Quinn had just nodded off when a nurse came quietly into the waiting room. "Are you here for Brittany Pierce?"

"Yes. I am. I'm her girlfriend. Is she awake? Is she ok?"

"You are her girlfriend?" Santana sees a softness come over the woman. She nods.

"I am. And I really need to be with her."

"I'm Emma Pillsbury. I'm the nurse assigned to her right now. She hasn't woken yet. I think maybe we can break the rules and take you back there. Just you for now though, is that ok?" Sam and Quinn both nod but it wouldn't have mattered. Nothing mattered so long as she got to see Brittany. Be there when she wakes up.

The nurse led her back to a room and gently pushes the door open. Santana's knees weaken at seeing Brittany on the bed, hooked up to all of those machines with a bandage around her head. But most of the blood was gone, and she was definitely alive. She just looked like she was sleeping. Except Brittany never slept that still on her back . "She lost a lot of blood. But the doctor stitched up the wounds on her head. She also had two broken ribs that, luckily, managed to not puncture anything. But they are going to be very painful for a few weeks. She's going to be ok though and she should be waking up any minute now." Santana nodded and walked quietly to the bed. She pulled a chair up and sat down, immediately taking Brittany's hand into her own and squeezing gently. "Just hit this button when she wakes up."

"Ok." The nurse walked silently out of the room and Santana was finally left with Brittany alone. "Hey B. It would be great if you could wake up." She tried to clear the tremble out of her voice. "I know you're just sleeping but I need to see your eyes. Or hear you talk." She cleared her throat again, knowing she was fighting a losing battle. "I'm so sorry I couldn't protect you Britt. I tried so hard." She broke down. She put her head down on the blanket and tried to control her crying.

Brittany first registered the pain in her chest. It felt a little like she was being squeezed and stabbed at the same time. The ache in her head came next. And then the warmth on her hand and a voice was talking to her but she couldn't quite make out the words. But she knew the voice. She forced her eyes open.

"S-San?" Santana heard a small voice and lifted her head. Brittany was awake and looking around.

"Baby you're awake!"

"What's going on?" Santana's heart stopped for a second, if Brittany forgot what had happened would she be able to explain it? "Are you ok? Did they hurt you?" She asked again before she struggled to sit up. "Ow!"

"Lay down Britt." Santana stood up and pressed Brittany's shoulder back to the bed with her uninjured arm. "I'm ok. We're in the hospital."

"Why do you have a sling on?"

"Dislocated shoulder. It's no big deal." She was smoothing the skin across Brittany's eyebrows. Unsure of where she could touch and not hurt. "You have to stay laying down. You have some broken ribs. But everything is going to be ok. Do you remember anything?" She tried to be as soothing as possible but the fear remained in Brittany's eyes.

"I remember calling Sam. And then those guys came. And one of them hit me?" Then Brittany felt like a hand had squeezed her heart as she remembered the look he had given her. "D-did he? Uh." She gestured to her lower half and Santana suddenly understood.

"No. No he didn't. He didn't ever get further than touching your leg. I pushed him off of you. I wouldn't let him hurt you. I'm sorry I couldn't protect you better." She filled Brittany in on the rest of what had happened, including Sam chasing the guys away. The fear lessened in Brittany's eyes at the news. She reached up and wiped at a tear rolling down Santana's cheek.

"You did protect me. I wish I could have protected you too."

"I'm so happy you're awake B." Santana just stood, staring at Brittany. Taking in the fact that Brittany was here and talking to her. Then she remembered she needed to hit the call button.

Nurse Emma shows up a few moments later and introduces herself to Brittany. Santana can tell Brittany is in a lot of pain and so apparently can the nurse. "I'm going to give you a little more medicine for the pain ok?" She pushes a few buttons on a pump that is attached to Brittany via IV. "That should feel a little better in a few minutes. Ok. So, I don't know if Santana has told you but you have a pretty bad injury to your head. We've stitched you all up but there's a definite concussion. You also have two broken ribs and a lot of bruising." Brittany forms a lot of questions in her head about what that means but is either too tired or too overwhelmed to ask them right now.

"Did you call my parents?" Was the only one that came out. Truthfully she hoped they hadn't. Brittany didn't want to deal with them on top of everything else. The nurse gave her a pitying look. "What?"

"We did call. We had a hard time getting a hold of them but we did manage." Brittany's grip tightened on Santana's hand. She wasn't sure what outcome she had been hoping for from that conversation.

"What did they say?" The nurse, for her part, didn't look like she wanted to answer that question. The nurse hesitates for a second longer.

"I did get a hold of them. I told them that you were here, that you had been attacked. They asked if it was critical. I told them that no, we were confident you would be ok but that you did have some pretty serious injuries." She took a breath and looked at the ground before continuing. "They said that they wouldn't be able to make the trip to see you. They are due to leave in the morning, they'll be gone until Monday. They said to have you contact them if need be, to let them know how you were doing." She looked back up and saw the anger in Santana's face and the hurt in Brittany's. "I'm sorry to have to be the one to have told you. I just thought you should know."

Santana was going to explode. She didn't even know she was capable of this kind of anger, not born of physical threat. How do you even say something like that? Her anger was spiraling but she heard Brittany start to cry and that snapped her back to what was important. She put her hand on Brittany's cheek as Brittany began crying harder. But every time she took a gasping breath she would clutch her side. The pain making her cry harder.

"Miss you need to calm down or you're going to make it worse." The nurse stated unhelpfully. Santana did the only thing she knew would calm Brittany. She walked to her uninjured side and crawled onto the bed, pressing herself as tight as she could to Brittany, gently stroking her wet cheeks. She felt Brittany's breathing start to even out. The nurse gestured to the button and then slipped out.

"Calm down baby. I've got you. We don't need them. Shhhh Britt. It's ok." She soothed Brittany till she was breathing almost normally again. It was still a little fast, but shallow enough that it wasn't hurting her to breathe. She made to get off the bed to give Brittany more room but Brittany's hold on her good arm tightened.

"Don't go. Please stay here with me." Brittany's breathing picked up again.

"Ok. I'm here. I'm not going anywhere." They cuddled together as best as they could despite their injuries. A few minutes later there was a light knock on the door before it was pushed open and Quinn and Sam stuck their heads in.

"They said we could come back for a few minutes if that was ok with you." Santana looked to Brittany who smiled slightly. She took that as a yes and waved their friends in.

"I brought you some clothes Britt. If you need them for going home or whatever. They might be Santana's. It's hard to tell the difference."

"Thanks Quinn. There wouldn't happen to be any socks in there maybe? My feet are cold." Quinn digs through the bag and finds the thicker pair of socks and pulls it out. Brittany goes to reach for them but Santana stops her before she hurts herself.

"I'll do it." Santana grabs the socks from Quinn and hops off the bed. She pulls up the blankets at the bottom of the bed and finds Brittany's cold feed. Her feet were often cold. When they cuddled she'd bury her cold toes under Santana's leg to warm them. She rubbed them for a second, trying to warm each before slipping the sock on and laying a small kiss to the top of her foot. After tucking her feet back into the blanket, Santana crawled back onto the bed and cuddled around Brittany.

"Thank you San." Santana nodded into her shoulder. "I heard that you chased those guys away from us Sam." Sam nodded grabbing her slightly outreached hand. "Thank you for helping us. I don't think I could ever thank you enough."

"How about another nail salon date and we call it even?" He smiled his huge smile at her and Brittany nodded. The heavy moment passed slightly.

"Santana. I think you should probably know that I called your parents once they told us Brittany was awake. Just so they would know that you're both ok." She had completely forgot. Her parents would have been so mad when they found out that this had happened and she hadn't called till the next day.

"What did they say?"

"There was a lot of Spanish. And then they said they would be here soon and were leaving in five minutes about half an hour ago." Santana tried to ignore the guilt she was still feeling in favor of the relief that her parents were coming. All she could think of right now was take care of Brittany. Make Brittany feel safe. Maybe her parents could help her figure out the rest.

* * *

**AN:** Let me know what you think. If you have questions or anything you can PM me or find me on tumblr, same user name as here.

And as always, thank you so much for reading and reviewing. It means a lot to me to know what you think/feel. And thank you to my beta for keeping me in check.

**AN2:** For those of you who are friends with me on tumblr. This chapter has nothing to do with, and is not in response to, and is in no way related to what happened to me and my friend. Obviously. For one, totally different. And two this was outlined long before that happened.

**Potential Trigger Warnings**: Violence and attempted sexual assault.


	20. Chapter 20

Light and slightly awkward conversation fills the air for the next twenty minutes or so. Brittany is stuck between feeling thankful that her friends are there, and especially thankful for Sam, and wanting to be alone with Santana. Pretty much everything hurts and the fact that she can't be held by Santana the way she wants right now is also not helping things. Quinn's cell phone starts ringing and the noise makes Brittany wince.

"Did that make your head hurt worse B?" Santana asked quietly. She had been mindful of how loud she was speaking. During cheerleading her senior year she got a minor concussion, nothing like what Brittany has gone through, but she could still remember how much less it hurt when things were a little more quiet

"A little." Santana pressed the gentlest of kisses against Brittany's forehead. Santana, leaning over the top of her, blocked out a little more of the light which helped too. She couldn't wait until they got to go to sleep. "Wait. Are they going to let you stay with me to sleep? San I don't think I can sleep if you're not here. If you can't stay I'm going to…"

"Shhh. Don't upset yourself Britt. I'm not leaving unless they physically carry me out. And something tells me my parents won't let that happen."

"I'm glad they're coming." Santana nods in response.

"S your parents are going to be here in like two minutes. They are parking. They have the room number. But that means we have to go. The nurse said nobody else could come back while we were still here." Quinn gets up and walks over to them. She gives them both hugs, lingering an extra second with Brittany. "I'm so glad you guys are going to be ok. Let me know what's going on. Ok?" Santana nods. Assuring her that she will. Sam comes up next and hugs Brittany making her promise that they'll get their 'nails did' soon. Santana hugs him tighter than she normally ever would which surprises him for a second before he hugs back.

"Thank you so much. I don't know what would have happened if you hadn't shown up. She could have-"

"Don't. Don't think about it. And don't thank me. I would do anything for my girls. You know that."

"I know. I will watch any movie and listen to any impression without complaint from here on out."

"Don't make promises you can't keep Lopez." He kisses the top of her head and waves to Brittany once more before leaving with Quinn. Santana walks over to the light switch and dims the lights a little more and climbs back into bed with Brittany. They are alone in relative quiet for approximately two minutes before the door flies open.

The best way Santana could describe her mother was panicked. She was muttering in Spanish and clutching her chest. As soon as she saw Brittany and Santana in the bed she ran over inspecting them. "My babies" she kept saying as she touched their faces and hands. Quinn had told her vaguely what happened. She knew that Santana had been waiting to see Brittany and that she had a dislocated shoulder and some bruising. But she had no idea if Brittany was ok or what the extent of the damage was. But she was awake and responding and seemed ok under the circumstances.

Santana, and the entire hospital probably, can hear her dad in the hallway demanding information and questioning anyone who would listen about Brittany's care. Once he seemed satisfied with the answer he rushed in and pulled out her chart, going over it quickly before replacing it. Then he inspected everything that Brittany was hooked up to before finally stopping and looking at the two girls still laying on the bed. "Are you two ok? Brittany can I look at your head? I promise I won't hurt you?" Brittany nods and Santana helps her sit up. Antonio gently looks at the injury on the back of her head. It looks pretty bad but the doctors did a good job stitching her up. Minimal scarring he thinks. But why anyone would hit this child so hard to cause this kind of damage was beyond him.

"Is it ok Papi?"

"Yeah Mija. It looks like they did a good job. Can I look at your ribs now Brittany?" Brittany nods and Antonio unties the sides of her hospital gown so he doesn't leave Brittany feeling exposed. He pulls some of the bandaging down and Santana gets a look at the bruising for the first time. Her breath gets stuck in her throat and tears spring to her eyes. Her mother is right there grabbing her hand. "Ok. I don't see signs of internal bleeding. It's possible that broken ribs can puncture a lung or any number of other organs but I think we're ok. But if you feel any additional tenderness in your abdomen area, or are finding it difficult to breathe, make sure you tell someone. Ok?"

"Ok." Santana makes a mental note to keep asking Brittany about that. He takes a few minutes to check over Santana's injuries as well before going back over and standing with his wife.

"Can you tell us what happened?"

"Quinn didn't?" Santana really didn't want to tell this story for what felt like the millionth time.

"No. We didn't really give her a chance. Quinn told us that Brittany was hurt really bad and that you were roughed up and that was all we heard other than the hospital name."

Santana nodded and launched into the story yet again. She watched as her mother got more and more upset, tears flowing freely. And her father getting more and more angry. Her father, like her brothers, were very protective of her and her mother. "The police are coming tomorrow to talk to Brittany. They already talked to me." She felt Brittany tense in her arms. "I know babe. I'm sorry."

"Well if we aren't here when they come, I want you to call us and we'll be here within just a few minutes. I'm sure they're doing a fine job, I just want to hear how things are going. Ok Mija?" Maribel tries her best to always trust the people on the right side of the law. But being a lawyer she's privy to a lot of things other people aren't. And while it isn't incredibly common, she doesn't want the police having any accidents on this particular case.

"Thank you Maribel."

"Of course sweetie. Have you called your parents yet? Would you like me too?"

"The hospital called." Maribel did not miss the bitter tone in her daughter's voice.

"And?" Santana hesitated. She didn't want to say it again. Didn't want to make Brittany deal with those feelings again.

"They couldn't come because they were going away."

"And they knew how serious this was?"

"She wasn't even awake yet Mami. All they knew was that the doctors expected she would be ok."

"Enough is enough. Brittany I would like it if you would switch us over to your emergency contacts when you get back to school. I will sign anything that I need to. There is no reason you shouldn't have full confidence that people will be here when you need them."

"Really?" Brittany was trying not to cry. She wasn't sure if it was the effort to stop herself, or the fact that she was failing and starting to cry anyway that was making her head hurt worse.

"Of course." He watches as Brittany press her hand to her head. "Does your head hurt worse?" Brittany's nod is so small it's almost imperceptible. He walks over and pushes a few buttons. "That should help in a minute." Maribel spends the next few minutes fussing over them being warm enough and having enough to drink. She notices the pain medicine seems to be taking effect and Brittany's eyes are getting heavier.

"We're going to go to the hotel nearby. Remember to call if the police get here before us. Or if you need anything at all."

"San can't leave." Brittany mumbles. Her tongue feeling suddenly like it's not working very well. She tries to increase her grip on Santana.

"She can stay here with you. I will make sure of it on my way out." Antonio pats Brittany's hand before heading out. Maribel follows after two rounds of gentle hugs and kisses were given. Santana climbs out of the bed and dims the lights further before crawling under the covers with Brittany and placing a kiss on her cheek.

Now that it's quiet and dark, Brittany can't help but feel the fear of what happened to them creeping into her chest. She knows Santana is trying not to hurt her by leaving a little bit of space between them but she needs her closer. She finds Santana's hand and pulls her until Santana gets the message and presses her body against Brittany's uninjured side. Brittany settles Santana's arm, hands clasped together against her lower abdomen. "Can you sing to me?" Brittany mumbles.

"Mhmm." Santana starts to hum before breaking into a version of "The Story" by Brandi Carlisle that she would be embarrassed of if she weren't so tired. But it's enough to sooth Brittany who drifts to sleep before the first chorus is up. Santana follows shortly behind grateful that exhaustion can override her racing mind.

After a surprisingly dreamless (she blames the pain medicine) sleep, Brittany wakes up to hushed voices in the room. She briefly considers trying to go back to sleep but the fact that she has to go to the bathroom so bad it's uncomfortable is making that a little difficult. She forces her eyes to open and starts searching for Santana's hand under the blanket.

Santana feels the movement and looks down at Brittany with her eyes barely open and a pout on her face. "You're up. Are you in a lot of pain Britt? What's wrong?" Brittany nods because yes she is in a lot of pain. But there are more pressing issues.

"Hafta pee." She mumbles. Santana looks to her dad, unsure of what to do. Should they call a nurse? Is Brittany allowed to walk?

"You can take her Mija. If you're okay with Santana helping you Brittany?" Santana hoped she would be. Hoped Brittany would let her take care of her.

"Duh." He chuckles a little as he comes over to the bed to help her sit up. He unplugs the IV from the port in her arm before sliding a hand behind her back.

"Just put your hand behind her shoulder and help her. Let me know if it hurts too bad Brittany." They help her sit up and Santana wants to stop every second because the look on Brittany's face is telling her the truth even when Brittany tells her it's fine, keep going. But they get her into a sitting position, and from there Brittany can handle the rest with less pain. Santana stands there, her arms out, braced, and ready at any minute to catch Brittany should the need arise.

They make their way to the bathroom slowly and shut the door. Santana turns respectively away as Brittany pulls up her hospital gown. She manages that part pretty well but can't figure out how to bend to pull her underwear down. "San." She wines. Santana whips around and sees Brittany standing there looking pathetic and in pain. It breaks her heart. "I need help." Santana rushes over and pulls Brittany's underwear down and helps her sit down. "This is the opposite of sexy." She mumbles, both embarrassed but feeling better now that she doesn't have to pee so badly.

Santana had turned back around to give Brittany some privacy until she needed help again, but she couldn't let that comment slide. She turned back in time to help Brittany stand back up and pull her underwear back up for her. "What do you mean babe?"

"Usually when you undress me sexy things are involved. And this is the opposite of that and I am just scared it's weird for you or something." She watches as Santana's face contorts into an almost hurt look.

"Brittany I don't- Sex isn't the most important thing here. Or ever. I love you. I want to be with you always. Taking care of you will be part of that sometimes. And I want that. I want to do these things for you. I hope you're comfortable with that."

"I am. I just don't want you to look at me different."

"You're still beautiful and amazing and sexy and everything else even if I have to help you pee Britt. Nothing is going to change that." She leans down and kisses Brittany's forehead. "Do you want to put on some clothes? Quinn brought you some of my sweats and a hoodie."

"And I have toothbrushes for both of you!" They hear from the other room. Santana hadn't realized how thin those doors were.

"Thank you Mami." She says back as a door opens and the bag of clothes and another bag is thrust into her hands. "Do you want to change?" Brittany nods. Santana helps her up again and over to the sink to wash her hands. She breaks the toothbrushes out of the package and holds them up to Brittany to choose color even though she knows Brittany will take the blue.

After teeth are brushed Santana sets to work pulling off the gown Brittany is wearing, leaving her naked except for the bandages around her chest and ribs, and the socks she had put on her last night. She can see some of the bruising and tries her best not to let it physically affect her. It's difficult. Brittany's pain makes her feel sick to her stomach and want to cry but now isn't the time for that. "Ok. Sweat pants. And a hoodie. Do you want to put your underwear back on? Quinn didn't bring any of yours. Or there is a pair of my boxer briefs if that's not weird?"

"I wear your boxers all the time San. It's not weird." Santana nods. Of course. And pulls them out of the bag.

"Put your hands on my shoulders and lift up one foot at the time. Just a little."

"My legs are fine Santana."

"Yeah they are." Santana jokes as she slides the briefs up Brittany's legs and rolls them once at her hips. She's not sure how far down the pain in Brittany's ribs goes and she doesn't want to risk it. Next the sweat pants. She kisses Brittany on the lips gently as she stands up and takes the hoodie out of the bag and unzips it. She helps Brittany in one arm at a time and then zips it for her.

"Can I have a hug?"

"I don't want to hurt you." Santana hesitates. Not immediately giving into Brittany is not something that comes naturally to her.

"You won't. I just need it." Santana steps forward and puts her arms around Brittany. Brittany sighs into the hug even though it's way more gentle than any hug she's used to. She just needed Santana's arms around her. The less hold the pain medicine has on her the more uncomfortable she feels, physically, mentally, and emotionally. It might not be so bad if Santana could hold her tight but she understand that's not going to happen. But being surrounded by her, wearing her clothes, and the hug, it helps. A lot even.

"Is everything ok in there?" Santana hears her mother ask through the door. She reluctantly pulls herself away from Brittany.

"Yeah Mami. Fine. We're coming." She turns back to Brittany. "I love you."

"I love you too." Santana puts her hand at the small of Brittany's back and guides her back into the hospital room. As soon as they walk through the door Antonio is leading Brittany back to the bed to plug her pain medicine IV back into her port. It's not long before Brittany starts to feel some relief and can relax into the bed a little.

"I brought some food. Just something small so you girls didn't have to eat the food here." She pulls some containers out of a bag and starts opening them. Brittany wants to be hungry but she just isn't. She's uncomfortable and she wants to leave and go lay with Santana in her bed.

"Are you hungry babe?"

"Not really." She replies quietly. Not wanting to hurt Maribel's feelings.

"What about just a few grapes? Just get something in your belly." Santana picks up a grape and holds it to Brittany's mouth, when she parts her lips Santana slides the grape in then moves her hand to caress Brittany's cheek bone as she chews.

Maribel watches the tender scene play out in front of her. She's never seen Santana be so gentle and outwardly loving with anyone or anything. But the way she touches Brittany, and the way Brittany looks at her, you would have to be blind to not see their love.

After a few grapes Brittany starts drifting off again. Santana is content to sit and watch over her all day, except that not five minutes later, the police walk in after lightly knocking. Santana doesn't want them there. She doesn't want them upsetting Brittany. But they are as polite and as nice as they possibly can be. They don't press Brittany for any additional information or make her try to remember things she can't. They tell Brittany the same thing that they told Santana, they'd be in touch, and left. "Can we go to your home now?" Brittany mumbles reaching for Santana's hand. Santana looks to her dad and he gets up and walks out of the room.

"Soon baby. We can go home."

"I like home. When we don't say yours. Even if it's yours. I just like home." Santana reached up and brushed away some of the hair that was near falling into Brittany's face. That sentence probably would have confused a lot of people. But Santana understood perfectly. Brittany likes home with her. When it's theirs together. That's all Santana can ever think to want for the rest of her life.

"It can always be ours. Close your eyes love." Brittany closes her eyes and Santana talks to her mami quietly all the while keeping her hand placed, with almost no pressure on Brittany's chest. She felt comforted by the steady, even if still shallow, up and down movements. While she was asleep, it definitely wasn't restful sleep. When her father came back in he told them that the nurse would be in to discharge them in a few minutes. "Should I wake her up?" Antonio nods in response and Santana leans forward and brushes her thumb back and forth over Brittany's cheekbone while whispering her name. Her eyes eventually fluttered open and her lip immediately curled into an adorable pout. "Oh baby. No pouts. They are coming to discharge you." Brittany's pout turned into a small smirk.

She thought it would go quicker. She thought the doctor would come in and say ok bye, and that would be it. But the nurse came first and gave her some pain pills that would help her once the IVs were taken out. Which she did next. Then the doctor came in and checked the clipboard at the end of her bed. Then checked her head and her ribs. Then left again. The nurse came back in a few minutes later with a prescription for more pain pills and then finally, after she had to sign a million papers, Brittany was allowed to leave. By time she had gotten out of bed and settled into the wheelchair they insisted she leave in, she could feel the IV pain medicine leaving her system. The other stuff wasn't quite as good. It kept the edge off, but she was definitely feeling very stiff and very sore.

By time they got back to Santana's apartment Brittany was feeling completely exhausted again. Santana could tell as she helped guide Brittany slowly up the stairs to her apartment that she was losing what little energy she did have and was putting more of her weight on Santana's supporting arm. "What do you want to do Britt?" Brittany looks around noticing that Quinn must have cleaned. She hesitates before she answers. She doesn't want anyone to think she's unappreciative of them being here but she's not sure she can stay awake.

"Would it be ok if I took a nap? I'm sorry I'm just really tired and sore." Santana tightened her grip on Brittany's hand. She hated that she couldn't get rid of her pain.

"Britt you don't need to apologize. Do you want me to lay with you?"

"I don't want to go by myself. But is that ok?" She looks to Santana's parents.

"Oh sweetie don't worry about us. We were going to run to the store and do a few things anyway." Maribel hugged both girls before they walked slowly back into Santana's bedroom, hands still linked.

When Santana opened the door it was obvious Quinn had been in the room. The note on her desk was probably the most obvious indicator, but her bedroom was also clean where when they had left the previous night it had been a little messy.

S,

Thought you guys might like some clean sheets when you got back. And then I couldn't stop. Love you guys. If you need anything I'm probably asleep but don't hesitate to wake me up.

Q

She did appreciate it. She was glad that Brittany got to come home to a clean and uncluttered room. But somehow, even though it was just some clean sheets and the dirty clothes put in the hamper, it just hammered in how much has changed in less than twenty-four hours. It exhausted her even more. She walked over to the bed and turned back the covers. "Can you help me take some of these clothes off?" Santana grabs a tank top out of her drawer knowing that's what Brittany will want to wear. She helps her undress down to the boxer briefs she had on, and the bandages still wrapped around her chest. She slips the tank top over Brittany's head before changing into a similar outfit.

Brittany gets into bed carefully with Santana's help and she instantly felt more relaxed than she had at the hospital even with the stronger pain medicine. As soon as Santana cuddled into her side she felt the added warmth and safety, and honestly she didn't stand a chance against sleep. Santana was surprised how fast Brittany fell asleep. She probably shouldn't be. Brittany had been through a lot. Last night and in general. Santana tried to push the thoughts out of her mind for the time being. Instead she counted the freckles on Brittany's nose. Counted her breaths. Made sure she brushed the hair out of her face if it fell. After she lost count of the breaths for the third time she fell asleep as well.

Brittany shifting wakes Santana. She opens her eyes thinking Brittany had already woken but she hadn't. A quick glance at her phone tells her that they've been asleep for almost three hours. She's glad. Brittany needs it. She presses herself closer to Brittany's side already missing not being able to hold her in her arms. After a few minutes of just watching Brittany she starts to notice the voices in the apartment. She had almost forgotten her parents were here. As soon as her mind drifted away from Brittany she was hit with a smell. She couldn't tell quite what it was, a mixture of things. But she was sure her mother was cooking. Her stomach growled a little. Other than a little bit earlier that morning she hadn't eaten anything since their early dinner the previous night. Brittany had eaten even less this morning. She wasn't going to wake her though. Or let her wake up alone. So she pressed a kiss to Brittany's bare shoulder and settled back into watching Brittany and trying not to think about what had happened.

It wasn't much longer that Brittany started to stir. Santana was a little afraid that Brittany was going to try and roll into her, which is what she would normally do if Santana weren't holding her. But if she did that it might hurt her. Thankfully before she actually rolled, Brittany began to wake up. First her nose scrunched up which Santana had a hard time not leaning up and kissing. Then Brittany yawned a little kitten yawn, which was the cutest thing she had ever seen. She pressed a few kisses to Brittany's shoulder and then cheek helping her out of sleep a little faster. "Thirsty." Brittany croaked. Santana turned and grabbed the water bottle she kept by her bed every night and tipped it to Brittany's lips. "Better. Thank you." Then Brittany pouted.

"What's wrong baby? Can I get you something?"

"I don't like sleeping flat it feels funny. And my side hurts. And I'm hungry."

"I know Britt. Maybe tonight you can try sleeping on your good side? But I think I have solutions for the other things. My Mami is cooking. And we have your pain medicine out in the living room. Feel up for hanging out on the couch?"

"Yeah." She started pushing herself into a sitting position, Santana helped her a little. As Brittany was still wiping the sleep out of her eyes Santana got up and threw on some shorts. She grabbed a pair of sweats for Brittany and helped her into them. They walk slowly out towards the living room. Nobody notices at first when they first walk in. Santana notices there's a lot of food on the counters. Multiple pans full. Where did all of that come from? Her dad and Quinn were watching football in the living room and her mother was predictably occupied in the kitchen. "Where did all this food come from?" Brittany says exactly what she's thinking. Maribel whips around, and seeing them, hurries over. She puts her hands on both of their cheeks and kisses them.

"We went grocery shopping. I needed to do something so I made you food for the week. You need good food to heal and you're all too skinny anyway. Tonight's dinner is almost done. How are you girls feeling?"

"Hungry. But fine." Other than her shoulder being a little tight and sore, Santana really did feel fine.

"Me too. Hungry. And some pain." Maribel nods.

"Antonio get Brittany her medicine."

"I can do it." Brittany tries, looking around hoping to see it laying out somewhere.

"Nonsense. We're here to take care of both of you. Let us do that. Ok?" Brittany nods almost disbelievingly. She was so used to taking care of herself when she was sick or whatever that it still took some getting used to. It might always. "Go sit down on the couch. Both of you." Santana takes Brittany's hand and pulls her over to the couch. There are already some pillows set up there with a blanket and Santana helps Brittany sit down.

Brittany takes the medicine that Antonio gives her and tries to get comfortable but she's having a hard time. Santana notices Brittany shifting around. "What do you need B?" She continues to shift around for a few minutes before answering.

"Can I lay against you? Everything makes it worse. But not if it hurts you, I can figure something out." Santana shakes her head back and forth.

"Let's lean you up." Santana helps her lean forward and then squeezes in behind her. Brittany leans back against her chest and sighs.

"Perfect." It's the most comfortable she had been since last night. "I don't want to move again."

"We don't have to." Santana says quietly and kisses the back of Brittany's head gently.

"How are you guys?" Quinn asks as she sits lightly next to them, trying not to jostle Brittany.

"We're ok Quinn. Thank you for cleaning up the room."

"Yeah Q. That was awesome. Have my parents been driving you crazy?"

"You're welcome. And no. They're fine. Just worried about you two. I don't need to tell you this but never ever again. Ok? Never walk home at night by yourselves. Please. Just-" Santana can see Quinn is tearing up.

"We will be safer Q. It's ok. The police are going to get those guys." Quinn nodded. Nobody wanted to talk about this right now. She got up and went over to the table.

"When we were out your mom picked up this movie. She thought Brittany would like it. And said you were too whipped for it to matter if you liked it or not." Quinn smirked over her shoulder at the look on Santana's face.

"MAMI! I am not- I mean I just love her so whatever she- whatever." She could feel Brittany giggling slightly against her chest.

"Ow." She said pitifully holding her side.

"Let me get you some ice Brittany." Antonio suggested. As soon as he got back with the ice pack Santana took it and held it to Brittany's side so Brittany didn't have to do it. The ice really did help. Plus the painkillers were just starting to kick in. The house was warm and filled with noises, people, and smells that made her happy. Most of all she's in Santana's arms, which is the only place she ever wanted to be.

"I love you." Santana whispered behind her.

"I love you too. So much." Santana couldn't stop herself from smiling. She was so thankful that she could bring Brittany comfort. She readjusted the ice back to cover another part of Brittany's injured ribs and felt her sigh into her even more. A few minutes later her mother announces that dinner is ready and that she will bring their plates. Brittany sits up with Santana's help as Maribel hands her a plate. She finds the action of bringing the fork to her mouth uncomfortable. But holding the plate up with the hand on her injured side isn't any better. She puts the plate on her lap but the rice kept falling off of the fork before she got it all the way to her mouth. She makes a noise of frustration but before she could even try and solve the problem Santana takes her plate and scoops her food onto her own plate. Then she holds it between them so that they are eating off of the same plate.

Maribel watches on and can't help but picture them in ten years. Santana taking care of a pregnant Brittany. Hopefully. She loved Brittany in a way she didn't know that she could love a child that wasn't hers. But to know Brittany was to love her. At least she thought. She couldn't fathom how Brittany's parents had treated her the way they had. And it broke her heart that last night had happened to both of them. "Your Papi and I talked about it girls, and I think I'm going to stay back from going to Puerto Rico. I don't want to be out of the country with everything that has happened."

"Wait I don't want to ruin your plans. I'll be ok." Brittany hated that she might be an inconvenience to someone who had treated her so well.

"Honey. You're not ruining my plans. Antonio still has to go. His Aunt is getting surgery and asked for him to be there. But I'm staying. We've talked about it. I don't want them to pick up the people who did this to you and you not be able to get a hold of me because I'm not in the country. Or if you need something. Your brothers are around but if I left I wouldn't stop worrying the entire time so it's better for all of us if I stay."

"Thank you so much. I don't know what I would do without you guys." Brittany felt overwhelmed with how much the Lopez family cared about her.

"You won't ever have to find out sweetie. We're going to leave tomorrow afternoon and take Quinn with us so she doesn't have to take the bus. Then your Papi is going to leave and I need to do a few things at the office. But then maybe I could come back down Thursday and take you girls shopping or something fun if you're feeling up for it."

"That sounds great Mami. Thank you."

After dinner they sat around watching Tangled. Brittany had a difficult time staying awake nestled into Santana. By time the movie was over Santana had to gently wake her.

"Girls we're going to get going. Brittany you can take your bandages off when you take a shower. But don't put them back on. Whenever you think about it I also want you to take a deep breath. I know it will feel uncomfortable but you should also try lying on your injured side. It will help with deeper breathing. A lot of times broken ribs lend itself to pneumonia and collapsed lungs. But you're young so as long as you're careful you should be ok. But at the first sign something is wrong I want you to call me or go straight to the doctor."

They could tell Brittany was getting tired again, and to be honest, Maribel and Antonio were pretty tired themselves so they headed back to the hotel after they promised to be back for breakfast in the morning.

"Want to take a shower baby?"

"Will you go with me?"

"Do you even have to ask?" Santana lays a kiss to Brittany's shoulder before getting up and helping Brittany stand up. Once they get in the bathroom Santana starts the water and then pulls off all of her clothes. Brittany can't help herself. She knows nothing can happen. She's in too much pain for that, but Santana's body is something meant to be admired. And admire she will. "Put your arms out so I can take this off of you." Santana tugs at her tank top hem. Brittany does what is asked and is left standing in an ace bandage and sweats, which Santana pulls down next.

As gently as she can she removes the clip holding Brittany's bandages shut. Then she begins to unwrap them. The more she unwraps the more she wished she could stop. Inch by inch of deep bruising is revealed to her. It makes her feel physically ill. By time the last of the bandaging has been pulled away Santana can feel tears burning in her eyes. She did a pretty good job all day not thinking about what happened to them last night. But here it was, a giant reminder that someone had hurt the love of her life. She ran her fingers up Brittany's side, barely touching her skin. She needed to be strong for Brittany. So she pulled away and turned towards the shower and stepped in. She held her hand out for Brittany to take to help steady her as she climbed in as well.

Brittany could tell it bothered her. She could read Santana better than any book she had ever tried. "What's wrong San?" Santana just shook her head and turned around looking for the body wash.

"Where the fuck is it?" She kept turning until she saw it. She grabbed for it but it slipped out of her hand and made a loud noise when it hit the bottom of the bathtub. "Fuck! Just fucking-"

"Stop. Santana what is wrong?" Brittany tried pulling Santana towards her to look at her but Santana avoided her eyes. "Look at me Santana." And when she did Brittany saw the tears coming out of her eyes. "Baby." She whispered.

"I'm sorry. I'm trying to be strong for you. I'm sorry." The tears started falling faster and Santana's chest started heaving with the effort of trying to keep it all in. Brittany reached up and pushed wet dark hair behind her ear and held Santana's face between her hands. "I was s-so s-scared Brittany." Then she broke down. She started sobbing and Brittany pulled her into her body. She couldn't stop herself from crying either.

"I know San. Me too. But we're ok."

"But you're not! You're hurt Brittany. You have stitches and terrible bruises and broken bones! He tried to touch you!"

"But he didn't" She pulled back to look into Santana's tear swollen eyes. "Santana he didn't. You stopped it. I'll be ok. We are both going to be just fine. I promise." Santana nodded and reached up to wipe some of Brittany's tears away. She pulled her in for a kiss. Tasting tears and finding a kind of comfort that they only bring to each other. Brittany pulls away and places one more kiss on Santana's forehead. "Ok?"

"Yeah." Santana nods sniffing back more tears. "Ok. I'm sorry."

"Feel better? Sometimes crying helps."

"A little. Can I wash your hair?" Brittany nods, and lets her. They finish up in the shower and walk back to Santana's room in just their towels. "What PJ's do you want?"

"Just underwear." Santana nods. Grateful for Brittany's decision.

"Have you been taking deep breaths?" Brittany stops. She hadn't actually been thinking about it. She takes one and feels a stabbing pain.

"I don't like that."

"I know baby. But you have to." Santana hands her a pain pill and the bottle of water while she turns back the covers on the bed. "Want to try sleeping on your bad side tonight? My dad said it would help with breathing."

"What if it hurts?"

"It might. But what if I lay on my side, and then you lay on your bad side and I will hold you. And if it starts to hurt too bad all you have to do is roll more on your back and I will help support you so it will hurt less. Ok?" Brittany agrees. Mostly because it means sleeping in Santana's arms as opposed to just next to her. She crawls into bed after Santana and slowly and very carefully lays on her injured side. It's uncomfortable and tight, but not something she can't deal with. Especially when she feels Santana's warm naked chest press into her back and an arm drape over her and a hand press to her chest where her heart is.

"I love you."

"I love you too Brittany."

"Sing to me."

"Always." She sings a half asleep version of "The Luckiest" into Brittany's ear as she feels Brittany's uneven breathing level out. After giving several kisses to the back of Brittany's necks, and several more whispered I love you's, Santana allows herself to fall asleep as well.

* * *

**AN: **Sorry it's taken so long.

Already started on the next chapter. I hope it will be quicker than this one.

Thank you to my beta as always. And thank you to all of you guys and your amazing comments. Let me know what you guys think. Anything you want to see?

About 10 chapters left.


	21. Chapter 21

**AN: **Thank you for your patience everyone! Here's one a little quicker. And good news, the next chapter is well on it's way!

Thank you as always to my beta. She's the most wonderful. And her reluctant third party that gives us legal advice. Thank you to her too.

And Happy Birthday to superspencerredcapeandall (on tumblr) thanks for giving me a goal! (I saw your post on my beta's tumblr).

And last. The next few chapters might be a little shorter. Some of them anyway. They are a little easier to write and the alternative is combining chapters to make them longer but then you get less chapters.

I can't confirm or deny the existence of a sequel yet. But I can confirm a few one shots. So if there's anything you'd like to see and it fits we might be able to work it in. Let me know on here or tumblr. Let me know what you think. Your input is so important and motivating.

* * *

Having the house to themselves was a blessing. Santana loved her parents, and she loved Quinn, but being able to just be alone with Brittany was amazing. They spent most of Sunday in bed or cuddled together on the couch watching movies. Monday was mostly the same except for a visit from Sam and Mercedes. It was clear that Sam had filled her in on what had happened and that she didn't want to bring it up but was distressed about it. Santana could tell because she brought them about a million different baked goods. And when Mercedes can't handle her feelings, she bakes.

The phone call to Rachel had been tough for Brittany. She knew how much Rachel cared about her and she knew ahead of time that Rachel would offer to come back, or offer for her to come to stay with her and her dads. Rachel offered both. But Brittany really just wanted the quiet comfort that came with laying in bed with Santana alone kissing gently for hours. Nothing made her feel better, mentally or physically, than that. Rachel, of course, understood. Brittany gave her permission to explain the situation to her fathers, which resulted in the largest fruit and chocolate basket she had ever seen delivered to their door the next day.

Maribel called every single day. Several times. And Santana's brothers called too. Diego and Miguel asked a million questions about the way the police had handled it. Wanting to make sure nothing was missed or messed up. Gabe was angry. He wanted to help them but it was obvious he didn't know how or what to do. Luis was logical. He knew Santana the best. He knew what Brittany meant to Santana and that seeing that could have done a lot of harm to Santana. He thought maybe they should go talk to someone. Santana didn't like the idea so he told her at the very least to remember that being careful is always a good thing. But that there aren't people waiting around every corner to attack them. This was an isolated event. He didn't want her to unintentionally shut herself off from other people in her attempt to protect Brittany.

Brittany was glad Luis had said that because she could feel Santana's trepidation when Brittany offered to answer the door when the fruit basket showed up. Or when Brittany asked if they could go for a little walk to stretch their legs. She just didn't know how to say that Santana can't cut them off from the world because some part of her wanted to do that too. But she knew that wasn't a possibility.

It was almost exactly 8:00 in the morning on Tuesday when they got a call from the Police Department saying that they had caught both guys Monday night. They asked if Brittany and Santana could come meet with a lawyer and a victims advocate today. They both agreed and as soon as they get off the phone they called Maribel to ask her what to expect.

After getting dressed and a half attempt at eating breakfast (they were both too nervous) they head to the address that was given to them over the phone. When they get there the first person they meet is a victims advocate, Annie. She looks like she could be someone's grandma. Santana almost makes fun of her sweater vest until it occurs to her just how nice this woman is being to them, and how sad her job must be. The sweater vest isn't so bad anyway. Her only job, she says, is to help them with whatever they need. Explanations of terms, someone to talk to if they get overwhelmed, someone to make sure that nobody is treating them in a way they shouldn't be. Also, she informs them, she gives wonderful hugs should the occasion arise. While the comment almost makes her roll her eyes, she's grateful because it's the first time Brittany's shoulders loosen a little and she's thankful that someone helped put Brittany at ease.

Next they talk to the lawyer, who tells them that this shouldn't be a very difficult case. They have surveillance footage, plus both of their statements, as well as Sam's, and the woman that called the police. If they plead guilty, which in the face of such overwhelming evidence they probably will, they might not even have to testify. They do, however, have to pick them out of a line up. When he says this Santana feels Brittany squeeze her hand harder and tense next to her.

"You just have to point them out Britt. They can't see you. You don't have to talk to them at all." Santana tried to play it down. Tried to make it seem like she herself wasn't completely not ok with seeing their faces again. But she'd do anything to make Brittany more comfortable.

"What if I mess up? What if I can't remember? What if that makes them get away with it and then they don't go to jail?" Brittany starts to cry and Santana stands up to hug her.

"Shhh Britt. That's not going to happen. If you don't remember then you don't remember. They will still have what I say, and the videos. It's going to be fine."

"Ok. When do we have to go?"

"They are ready for you now. But you can only go one at a time."

"Why don't I go first Britt. You go get some hot chocolate with Annie and then by time you get back it will be your turn and then we'll be back together. Ok?" Brittany nods but Santana can see the pout reforming.

"We do have some pretty fancy hot chocolate in the break room honey. Let's go get some. " Brittany nods but stands up and hugs Santana first. Santana tries to pour every ounce of calming energy she can into Brittany before pulling apart, giving her a quick kiss, and allowing Annie to pull her out of the room.

"Let's make this quick please." She says to the lawyer.

Annie was right. The hot chocolate was fancy. There was white chocolate raspberry and mint and dark chocolate. Brittany made herself a white chocolate raspberry and Santana a mint hot chocolate. She and Annie discussed their love of cats, and Annie showed her pictures of her two orange cats. Brittany loved them. She wanted a cat so bad and hoped that maybe someday, even though Santana didn't seem crazy about the idea, they could get one.

By the time they got back to the room the lawyer was outside waiting for them. It really was quick. When Annie asked if she wanted her to go with her she hesitated, not wanting to leave Santana alone. "I think she's ok in there. Maybe just drop off her hot chocolate." Brittany nodded, feeling bad that she was going to leave Santana alone but she really wanted Annie to come with her. So Annie ran in Santana's hot chocolate and came back out assuring her that Santana was fine and playing a game called Angry Birds. Brittany smiled and they walked over to a room with a big window. There were a few more people in the room but the lawyer and Annie just nodded to them so she didn't ask.

"All they can see is a mirror Brittany. We'll have two sets of people walk in, you just tell me the numbers of the men who attacked you. Ok?" Brittany nodded and the first set of guys walked in. While it was scary to see him again Brittany immediately let out a sigh of relief knowing that she recognized him right away.

"Number 4."

"Good. Next." All of those guys shuffled out and the next batch shuffled in. This group contained the man that had actually physically hurt her. She must have made some indication that she was afraid because Annie put her arm around her and Brittany felt a little better. She wished it was Santana. She took a deep breath and looked at all the guys.

"Number 2." She was positive. She'd never forget his face. She felt a little silly that she thought she might even though she's had several nightmares about him. The lawyer released them and led Brittany back to the room where Santana was. As soon as they walked in Santana jumped up and ran over to Brittany looking like she was going to tackle hug her. But she stopped herself. Remembering how sore Brittany was and took her into her arms gently.

"Are you ok?" Brittany mumbles something that sounds like a yeah into her neck and after a few more seconds they pull apart. The lawyer thanks them and tells them he'll be in contact and rushes out of the room.

"The last thing I want to warn you girls about is that because it was in the police report that they made homophobic comments towards you, I can't promise that it won't come up in court. And even if it doesn't, we can't control what the media says. So if I were you, and you haven't mentioned your relationship to anyone, now might be a good time for your own sake." Brittany is shifting in her seat and Santana knows that this is the most that she's done since she was hurt and she wants to get her home.

"Thank you. Can we go now?" Annie gestures toward the door and Santana gets up, waiting for Brittany before taking her hand and heading to the car. They were both quiet for a few minutes before Brittany broke the silence.

"I want to tell them."

"What?"

"I want to tell my parents." Santana took a minute to process that thought. She shook her head.

"I don't know Britt. You don't really need to. The live far enough away that I don't think they're going to hear about this." Brittany understood Santana's hesitation. But this was something she had been thinking about for some time.

"No. I want to tell them. I don't want to feel like I'm hiding the most important part of my life. I'm not afraid. What's the worst that can happen? I don't even live with them anymore. As long as I'm not embarrassing them they don't really care what I do." The car was quiet for a few seconds. The hand tightening around her own was one of the only indications that Santana wasn't just ignoring her. Besides the fact that Santana would never just ignore her.

"Fine. But if you're going, I'm coming too. I won't move on this Britt. I love you. And I don't want this to come off as me telling you want to do or me trying to control you, but you are the most important part of my life too and I am under no circumstances ok with you being alone with those people. If they touch you again-"

"Ok. That's ok. We can do it together. I don't want to go without you either."

When they get home Brittany goes to lay down on the couch and Santana calls her mother, as promised, to let her know how things went. Her mother said that everything sounded like it had been pretty straight forward. She put her mom on speaker phone and set down with Brittany. "The only other thing is that Brittany wants to tell her parents about us."

"Oh. That makes me nervous." Maribel answers.

"Me too."

"At worst they get mad. Or they'll probably just continue to ignore me." Brittany tries to reason with them both. She really wants to do this. Then no more Tommy or hiding or anything.

"Well if you're decided then you're decided. I'm buying you both plane tickets right now." Brittany wants to tell her that she doesn't have to do that. That it's too much. "Don't argue with me Brittany, you can't sit in a car for that long with your injuries and I don't want Santana driving that long with her shoulder. You can fly out early in the morning. And then fly back on Thursday. I will pick you guys up. I'll put enough money in your account for a rental car and a hotel Santana. Do not let her go into that house alone. You hear me?" Brittany can't help but be touched by the tone of concern in Maribel's voice.

"Way ahead of you Mami."

"If things get even the least out of hand-"

"Call the police. " Santana interrupts. "I know."

"I know you know. It's my job to worry about both of you. Call me and let me know how everything goes ok?"

"Promise. And we'll text you when we land and everything." Brittany interjects.

After a few more warnings and a quick check to make sure they are eating the food she made, (of course they are) they get off the phone. Santana packs them a bag to share and they go to bed early so they aren't a mess for their early flight in the morning.

The next morning Brittany was more quiet than usual. Which was understandable. She's both in pain and about to do something that Santana is very nervous about, so she can't even begin to understand how Brittany feels. They get to the airport early enough and get to their terminal. "Do you want or need anything B?"

"Maybe hot tea? Can we get that anywhere near here?"

"I saw a Starbucks. Stay here with the bags ok?" Brittany nodded and Santana leaned forward to kiss Brittany and then walked off. When Santana returned, she had made Brittany's tea exactly the way she likes it without having to ask. This makes Brittany feel just a little bit better.

Planes make Brittany nervous but Santana distracts her with stupid jokes until the plane actually starts to move really fast and then Brittany just closes her eyes and squeezes Santana's hand. "Ok. We're up Britt." Santana whispers into Brittany's ear. Brittany eases her eyes open and leans her head against Santana's.

It's a short flight so before they know it they are descending. Brittany is too nervous to remember to be scared. Maybe she should have called? Her mother is rarely home. She figures telling her will be enough. Her mom will tell her dad and honestly she can't remember the last time her and her father had a meaningful conversation so starting now is probably not the best idea.

They get to the car rental desk and pick up the car her mother had rented for them in advance. After they get their bag in the car and get in Santana looks at Brittany who is looking down at her knees. "You ready Britt? We can check in first if you aren't." Brittany shakes her head.

"No. Let's go. It's going to be ok." Santana hopes so. But she would be lying if she said she was optimistic. She plugs Brittany's address into her phone and starts to follow the GPS. She didn't need the destination time on the GPS to know how close they were, she could tell by Brittany's body language. She hated that she couldn't take this stress away from her. When she got close she recognized the house and pulled over out front.

"Are you ready?"

"I don't even know if anybody is home."

"Do you have a key?"

"No. I know the garage code." Santana nodded. When Brittany made no move to get out of the car Santana got out first and met her over on the passenger side. She opens the door and crouches in front of Brittany's seat.

"We can turn around. It's not too late. Or we can go inside and do this. I am right next to you either way baby. Ok?" Brittany turns and Santana helps her out of the car. She wraps her arms around her before she even shuts the car door. Brittany hugs back tight, trying to draw all the comfort she could from the familiar feel of Santana's arms.

"Ok. I'm ready." Brittany nods once resolutely as if to reaffirm this to herself, and starts walking towards the house. She punches in the garage code and pulls Santana in behind her before hitting the button to shut it. "They're both home." She mumbles. She pushes the door into the house open and steps in. Santana follows closely behind. Every protective instinct she has ever had is on high alert right now.

"Jen?!" She hears her Mom call from the other room.

"N-no Mom. It's me." Brittany calls back. Santana doesn't know if Brittany's mother could have possibly even heard her. Brittany's eyes are downcast and she's wringing her hands. Santana hates seeing her like this. She wants to comfort Brittany, do anything to make this a little easier. But before she can, a stern looking woman comes around the corner.

"Hello Brittany. And you are?"

"Santana." She thinks that maybe at one point Mrs. Pierce might have looked like Brittany. But you can see the amount of work she's had done which has nearly changed her appearance completely.

"Nice to meet you." She responded coldly. But Santana didn't care how she treated her, what she cared about was how defeated Brittany looked. Is this what her mother turned her into every time she was around her? "Why are you here Brittany? This is quite out of the way for you I think." Who the hell is this woman?

"Is Dad here?"

"You know he is. You saw his car in the garage. Take a minute and think before you speak Brittany." Brittany felt Santana tense beside her.

"I need to talk to both of you." Brittany pushed forward. They needed to get this done. With any luck her mother will be frustrated that she wasted both of their time and then she and Santana can leave. Her mother pulled her cell phone out and called her father to come down. Her mother turned and walked towards the dining room. Brittany assumed that meant she was supposed to follow. They sat down and a few minutes of dead silence later her dad came in.

"Brittany."

"Dad. This is Santana." He nodded once in her direction. Santana hadn't expected this. She had at least expected fake nice. But they weren't even that. The way they treated Brittany even in her presence made her so angry. She can't even imagine how they would be if she weren't here. Would they have even agreed to talk to her at all?

"Well. Go on then. We don't have all day Brittany. You really should have called." Brittany bowed her head again. Santana was furious. She wanted to grab Brittany and make out with her, flip them off, and leave. They didn't deserve to know. They didn't deserve to know her at all.

"Sorry." Brittany took a deep breath. "As you heard I was in the hospital."

"Oh. Right. You're ok then obviously. Go on." Brittany looked like she wanted to tell her father that she wasn't ok. That it was hard for her to sleep because she was sore and how deep breathing was difficult and coughing was the most painful thing ever. At least that's what Santana knew and wanted to tell them.

"Uh. Yeah. Well. We were, we got attacked. By some guys." Santana watched them as Brittany spoke looking for any reaction. Barely anything at all. They looked almost bored. "We have to go to court. And they said that it might get media attention. And I w-wanted you to hear it from me. Santana and I are dating. We're together." Dead silence.

They both turn toward Santana and she watches Brittany's mother's face turn from passive annoyance to furious. She opens her mouth to say something and Santana was prepared for anything to come out of that mouth. But before she could say anything Brittany cut her off.

"No. You do not get to say mean things to her. She is the best thing that has ever happened to me. You can say whatever you want to me, but not her." Santana turned to Brittany with a mixture of pride and sorrow that she would stand up to them but not for herself.

Brittany tried not to fold under her mother's glare. "Get out. Now. We will no longer be financially supporting you. Leave Brittany. We never want to speak to you again." Brittany gets up and Santana follows. They walk towards the door and Brittany can hear her parents following them.

Brittany stops and Santana watches her turn back around, presumably to say something to her mother. She watches as Mrs. Pierce pulls her hand back as if to hit Brittany but as soon as she swung Santana stuck her hand out and cut the woman's arm. She had been prepared for this. "You don't touch her ever again. Ever." She forcefully pushes her arm away, using all her restraint to not just punch the woman. She takes Brittany's hand and pulls her outside and doesn't stop until she's got Brittany safely in the car with the doors locked.

"Brittany are you ok?" She takes one of Brittany's hands in hers and pulls so that Brittany is slightly facing her. "Baby are you ok?"

"Can we go to the hotel?" Santana continues to watch her for a few minutes before nodding and turning back and starting the car. She heads toward the hotel listening to the saddest little sniffles as Brittany tries to hold back her tears. It breaks her heart and she finds herself trying desperately not to cry as well.

When they pull into the hotel Santana gets out of the car and grabs their bag before helping Brittany out of the car. When they get into the lobby she asks Brittany to text her mami to let her know that they are at the hotel and that she will call later. Brittany nods and sits down near the elevator with the bag while Santana checks in.

When Santana comes back over Brittany looks worse. "Britt?"

"They already had my cell phone turned off." She wipes a tear away that managed to escape. "That was quick."

"Ok. We'll just use mine. It's ok." She doesn't know how to take all of this hurt away from Brittany and it's killing her. She texts her mother before leading Brittany up to their room.

It wasn't that late but Brittany just wanted to go to bed. Or she just wanted to be as close to Santana as she could be. "Do you want to talk about this Britt?" She wanted to not think.

"Not right now. Can we just please lay down? Please?"

"Of course baby. We'll order room service later for dinner and watch a movie or something ok?" Brittany nods gratefully. She strips down to her underwear and climbs into bed waiting for Santana to do the same. Santana thought pajamas might be involved, but she should have known better. This is how Brittany feels most comfortable. So Santana does the same, and climbs in. Brittany instantly crawls into her arms.

"I love you so much Brittany. Everything is going to be ok." She can feel that Brittany is crying by the way her chest is convulsing. She runs her fingers over every bit of skin she can reach trying to calm her down. Eventually it works and Brittany falls into a light sleep.

Santana wants to call her mom to tell her what happened. She knows that her mother is probably literally sitting there with her phone in hand waiting to hear from them and hates to leave her waiting and worrying. But she knows it will physically hurt to not have Brittany in her arms right now. The conversation might be better had with Brittany asleep though, not having to listen to it all over again. She sighs and is thankful that Brittany isn't actually laying on her like she usually is and maneuvers herself gently out of bed. She waits for a second making sure Brittany isn't going to wake up before grabbing her phone and making her way to the bathroom. She hops up on the sink and dials her mother's number.

She explains what happened and what Brittany's parents had said. That they tried to hit Brittany right in front of her and it wasn't long before tears were running down her cheeks. "I don't understand Mami."

"You aren't meant to Mija. Good people shouldn't be able to understand the actions of bad people. I'm glad you both got out of there ok." And then there was a brief pause. "Poor Brittany."

"Yeah." Another period of silence passes. Santana just watches Brittany's back rise and fall. She's on her stomach now and the blankets have slipped down enough that Santana can see some of the bruising on her side. "I hate that I can't fix it. I just don't want her to hurt anymore."

"Shhh Mija." Maribel tries to calm her.

"I'm ok. I just love her. And I hate this."

"That's part of loving someone Santana. Their pain is your pain."

Maribel can't fathom this. She knew it was bad but Santana confirming it makes it worse. "Oh. They already shut her phone off."

"Make sure you put her numbers in your phone for now. Ok? Go take a nap with her. We'll figure all of this out in time Santana. Don't worry. But let Brittany get to a place where she can talk about it before we bombard her with solutions. Ok?"

"Ok. I think tonight we're just going to watch a movie. Maybe do room service."

"Sounds good Mija. Call if you need me. I love you."

"I love you too."

"Tell Brittany I love her as well."

"I will." After they hang up Santana sends Quinn a text letting her know the gist of what happened. She sits there watching Brittany for a few more moments before Brittany starts to shift. She rolls on her side and not finding Santana, calls her name. "I'm right here baby."

"Come back." Santana can hear the pout in her voice and walks back over to the bed. She climbs in and presses her front to Brittany's and wraps her arms around her. Brittany cuddles in closer and lets out a sigh. "Much better."

"Agreed. Do you want to go back to sleep? Or are you hungry?"

"Hungry." Santana reaches behind her to the bedside table with the hotel book on it and grabs it. "What do you want?" She opens the book behind Brittany's back and reads it over her shoulder. "Liver and onions?"

"Gross San." But Santana can hear the smile in her voice and that makes her happy. "Guess what I want."

"Strawberry pancakes with whipped cream and hash browns and bacon?" Brittany looks up at her.

"That wasn't what I wanted. But that's what I want now." Santana laughs and picks out something for herself before calling it down to the front desk. She gets up and throws Brittany a pair of sleep shorts and a tank top before putting on her own cut off sweats and a tank top.

They pretend to argue about a movie except Santana knows all along that Brittany gets what Brittany wants (which is really no different than normal) before they settle on a comedy that Santana hadn't heard of.

The rest of the night was spent watching movies, and then comedy central. Some people drank to make themselves feel better. Or any other host of destructive behaviors. When Brittany was very sad, she wanted to find a way to laugh Santana learned.

The next morning they get up and are just getting ready to go when Maribel calls to confirm their flight arrival time. They have to drive back from the airport anyway because they drove to it, but she's going to meet them at their apartment instead of out somewhere because she's bringing Quinn back with her.

On the plane Brittany can't stop herself from thinking about what all of this means. "I'm scared I won't be able to stay in school."

"What?"

"I'm scared that my parents cutting me off means I won't be able to stay in school. My parents paid for my dorm room. My scholarship pays my tuition but not anything else. My dorm, food, books, all of that stuff."

"We'll figure something out. There have to be more scholarships you can apply for. Maybe we can schedule a meeting with someone at financial aid to talk to them about it." Brittany puts her head on Santana's shoulder.

"The phone thing sucks. But school scares me the most. And health insurance. Teaching dance class might help but it can't cover all of those things." Santana knows that. But they will figure it out. Her mom and dad will help them figure it out.

"We will talk all of this through with my mom and dad. They might have better ideas than we have." Brittany nods and takes Santana's hands in hers and plays with her fingers.

After they land and drive home they get inside and Maribel is on them hugging them both to her at once and kissing their cheeks. "My babies." She sniffs and Santana can tell there are tears she's trying to hold back. She claps her hands. "Ok. Let's go. Food. Shopping." They go to head out of the door when Quinn stops Santana.

"Can I borrow your car?" Santana nods handing her the keys before she walks out. After they get into the car and decide on where they are going for lunch Santana asks why Quinn wasn't coming with them.

"I asked. She said she couldn't come." Santana nodded. She reached up and tickled the back of Brittany's arm to get her attention.

"Feeling ok Britt? Need a pain pill or anything? I brought one with me just in case." Brittany smiled back at Santana. She wondered if she would ever get used to how amazing Santana was to her.

"I'm ok right now. Maybe after lunch. Thank you though." When they got to the restaurant they discussed where they wanted to go next. Santana was concerned about keeping Brittany out too late and Brittany had to agree. Moving just felt like it took so much extra energy right now. So they decided a few stores in the area as well as grocery shopping and then home. Maribel had a meeting in the morning anyway so staying late wouldn't be the best idea.

Lunch was amazing. Maribel, as per usual, forced dessert upon them. Not that she had to do much forcing. Brittany always found it hard to say no to dessert. Then they went Macy's. Everything Brittany looked at for more than a few seconds, Maribel would grab as soon as she looked away. Brittany caught on eventually and was going to protest but Maribel cut her off quickly. "Brittany I am a grown woman and I will decide how I want to spend my money." How do you even respond to that.

So after some new jeans, sweaters, and makeup for both girls, they head back to the car. "Where to next girls? Shoes right?" Santana confirms and they head to DSW. Brittany had never been in a DSW and was slightly overwhelmed. But they were running a sale, buy three pairs get two free. "So I need a new pair of shoes for work but that's all. Your father will kill me if I bring home more shoes. So you get two pairs each." Santana takes Brittany's hand and leads her off to their size.

"San this is too much."

"Why Britt? She loves you and wants to make sure you have the things you need. That's what a parent does babe. My mom is sometimes a little over zealous about it. But it makes her happy. Makes her feel like she's helping."

"She always helps. I love your mom."

"Good. I don't think you're going to be able to get rid of her any time soon." Brittany leaned down to kiss Santana before they start looking for shoes. Once she let go and just let herself have fun she found it difficult to narrow it down to only two pairs. But she did and before long they were on their way to their last stop at the grocery store. Brittany mostly just followed along holding Santana's hand. She was starting to get sore and tired. "Brittany you're not putting anything in the cart honey. What kind of cereal do you want?"

"Oh I have a meal plan."

"You spend more time at the apartment than you do at your dorm room so you should have food you like to eat there too." Brittany liked the food at the apartment. But mostly because she wasn't picky and Santana bought things she liked anyway. But she reached out and picked out a box of Lucky Charms because they were her favorite and put it in the cart.

"Thank you Maribel." As they went through the store Brittany threw a few more things in the cart with some gentle prodding. They are soon on their way home, and Brittany couldn't be more excited. She was definitely ready for some pain medicine and cuddling. They got home and carried up some of the stuff they had bought. Maribel insisted they go up and she would bring in the rest. As soon as they opened the door Brittany barely had time to register that Rachel was in the apartment before she was running at her. She braced herself for the impact that did not come.

"Rachel! Calm the fuck down." Santana yelled as she held Rachel back with one arm. She let her go and took a deep breath. "You can't just go running at her like that. It makes me nervous." Santana felt Brittany's hand warm and steady at the small of her back and instantly felt a little better. She couldn't help but be over protective.

"I'm sorry Santana." Rachel said meekly. "Are you two ok? Can I hug you now?" Brittany hugged Rachel who was very careful. Rachel then hugged Santana quickly before taking a step back.

"I thought you weren't coming back until Sunday."

"I wasn't. But then when you told me what had happened to you I felt terrible for not being here. My fathers and I were discussing the possibility of me coming back on Saturday and they would be able to stay the night and have lunch with all of us. But then Quinn called and told me what happened with your parents and, after again discussing it with my fathers, they agreed to let me come back via bus today."

"So missing Quinn had nothing to do with it? Hm?" Brittany teased.

"No! I mean. A little. But really Brittany it was you. Also. I know your phone got shut off. And my fathers thought that was unacceptable. So, here." Rachel pulled an iPhone out of her pocket, just like her old one only it looked to be a slightly newer model. "You're on our family plan now. None of us want you to be without a phone. They already put their phone numbers in the phone and have told me to inform you that since they now pay for it, you are obligated to talk to them and play Words With Friends with them."

Brittany didn't know what to say. She looked around but Santana was talking to her mother in hushed words in the kitchen. It sounded like Spanish but it was a little too quiet for her to hear. She looked back at Rachel who was still beaming at her. "Rachel I don't know what to say. I don't know how to even accept this."

"You kind of have to. They signed a two year contract. Also they would like free tickets to all of your future dance shows as compensation." Brittany nodded her head.

"Of course. Absolutely. Can we sit down on the couch? I'm sorry. This is a lot. And I already hurt." She caught Santana's eye who signaled that she would be there in a second. Brittany, Quinn, and Rachel discussed how things had gone pretty well at the court house and how they were just waiting for more information before anything else happened. She called Rachel's dad on her new phone to thank them and get a run down on this Words With Friends business. A few minutes later Maribel and Santana walked back into the living room.

"Groceries are put away girls. Let me know if you need anything. Finish those leftovers before they go bad." She hugged Quinn and Rachel before she came over to Brittany and hugged her and kissed the top of her head.

"You call me ok? For anything. Antonio too. We'll be very upset with you if we find out you needed something and didn't call. Ok?" Brittany nodded and hugged Maribel once more for good measure. She undeniably felt more loved by her than she ever had her own mother.

Santana hugged her mother again, whispering another thank you in her ear before walking her to the door. "Not that I'm not glad to see you guys. But I think I need a nap. Britt?" Brittany nodded gratefully. Nap or not, she really needed to lay down her ribs were killing her. Santana reached out a hand and helped her up, they went back towards her room with promises of doing group dinner in a few hours.

They got back into the bedroom, Brittany grateful to finally be alone. Santana was standing at her desk looking down at nothing in particular. "Santana?"

"Hm?"

"Are you ok?" Santana turned and looked at her, she looked nervous Brittany thought. Then she slowly walked toward her and leaned up and kissed her gently. The kiss deepened if only slightly before Santana pulled away.

"Move in with me?" Brittany hadn't processed what Santana had just said, as she was currently more focused on kissing her again. But when it did sink in…

"Wait what?" Santana took Brittany's hands into hers.

"I want you to move in with me. When school ends. Your dorm room is paid until then, but after that, move in with me?"

"That's. Santana I-"

"I know it's a big commitment. But I want to spend forever with you so I mean comparatively it's kind of a small commitment. Mami and Papi will pay for two thirds of the apartment. They had already discussed this as an option last night. My mom was just waiting to see if I would ask her. And Quinn is completely on board."

"It's too much Santana. I can't ever repay them that." Brittany feels overwhelmed by the generosity. It's hard to take, all at once. All of the wonderful things that these wonderful people have done for her already. And then this?

"They put four boys through college practically at once. Me by myself must feel like nothing to them. They already pay half the rent so two thirds isn't that much more, they'll barely notice. And this is all selfishly motivated because really all I want is to wake up with you every morning. I need you here with me. And I don't want to discuss any options that involve you not coming back to this school. Or doing something that makes you unhappy. This will make us both happy." Brittany knows she's right. This is absolutely the best scenario. And though accepting the help of others is difficult, she thinks she might just need to learn to get used to it for now.

"Ok."

"Yeah?"

"Yes. I want to move in with you." Santana's face splits into the biggest smile Brittany has ever seen on her before she's back on her toes kissing Brittany senseless. She pulls back slightly and rests their foreheads together. "I can't be without you either Santana. I love you so much." Santana kisses her once more before pulling away and tugging Brittany towards the bed.

"Celebratory nap?"

"Best idea ever." Exactly twenty four hours ago Brittany had very real reason to believe that unless she figured something out she might have to leave school. She might have to go somewhere else causing her to be any number of hours away from Santana just so she could find a way to make a living. She might not be able to find a way to make a living dancing. But now. Today. She had new clothes, new shoes, lucky charms, and the knowledge that this was her home. Santana. And this apartment. And these people. But mostly Santana.


	22. Chapter 22

**AN: **Has it been less than a week since my last update? Either way, I hope you enjoy this one. I really do.

And thank you to my beta. And her infinite source of legal advice even if that source things we're silly.

And. I mean thank you to all of you. I would write if you didn't read.

* * *

Spring break was almost over. It was the night before classes started back up and Brittany and Santana had gone to bed early. Brittany was laying half on top of Santana who was running her fingers up and down Brittany's naked back. She feels Brittany sigh heavily into her. "What are you thinking about baby?"

"I'm worried that not being able to dance is going to hurt my scholarship. I hadn't thought about it yet." Brittany turns her head so that she's looking at Santana's face.

"I don't think that's going to happen. Legally I don't think they're even allowed to do that. I'm not sure. I can talk to my mom and see what she says?"

"Maybe let me talk to my professors first before we involve Mamma Lopez ok?"

"Ok. But if it gets to it, you'll let me know so I can talk to her right?"

"Promise." Brittany rolls very carefully onto her back and looks over at Santana. "Kiss me?" Santana smiles and leans over on top of Brittany, pressing her body gently into Brittany's and connects their lips. The kiss heats up quickly as Brittany gently runs her tongue along Santana's lip. Santana strokes her own tongue along Brittany's causing her to moan. She can feel arousal stirring in her stomach. It had been so long by their standards since she touched Brittany, or Brittany touched her. She understood why. Was even mostly responsible as she was terrified to hurt Brittany, but it meant that she couldn't help that she was getting hard so fast.

Brittany could feel Santana's semi-hard shaft pressing into her thigh. Santana pulled away from her presumably to calm herself down but Brittany didn't want that. She wanted more. "Please don't stop." She breathed out.

"I don't want to hurt you."

Brittany grabbed her upper arms to stop her from pulling away further. "You won't. We'll be gentle. Please Santana. I need you." How do you say no to that? How do you say no to your girlfriend who was practically begging you? You don't. But Santana couldn't let go of the idea that she might hurt Brittany if they had sex. She leaned down to kiss her again. When air became necessary she started kissing down Brittany's jaw to her neck. She was already breathing hard and Santana could tell how much she wanted this. She continued to kiss down her chest and kissed her right nipple. "More." Brittany moaned.

Santana smiled as she took the nipple gently between her lips, sucked for just a few seconds before she let it go and blew cool air gently across the puckered skin. "It's been over a week. Please don't tease." Santana didn't respond she just took the other nipple into her mouth giving it the same treatment. She went back and forth, sucking longer each time before she started to kiss her way gently across still heavily bruised skin, down past her belly button and to the elastic of her underwear.

She needed to make a decision. Keep teasing? Or give in? She decided not teasing was the safer option if she wanted to keep Brittany from moving a lot and potentially hurting herself worse. She kneels up and hooks her fingers under the elastic and pulls down exposing short blonde curls. Before pulling her underwear off she bends down and presses a kiss to the exposed skin and soft curls making Brittany hiss. "San please."

Santana pulls the underwear the rest of the way off and Brittany spreads her legs in anticipation. Santana looks down at Brittany, already wet, and licks her lips before setting between her legs on her stomach. At this point she couldn't help herself even if she wanted to tease Brittany more. She licks Brittany from her entrance up earning a loud moan. "Like that baby?" She repeats the action causing Brittany's hips to buck slightly.

"Uh-Uh huh". Santana reaches her hand up pressing it to Brittany's lower abdomen helping to steady her and dips her tongue back into Brittany. She circles her clit before moving down and circling her entrance, dipping her tongue in a little bit. Her eyes roll back at the taste and she moans into Brittany before pushing her tongue in further. She moves her tongue in and out for a few seconds before pulling out to adjust her position. She is so hard that it's almost painful. She leans back forward and takes Brittany's clit between her lips and sucks gently making Brittany moan louder. Thank God Quinn and Rachel were staying in her dorm room.

"San I need you inside." Brittany's voice makes her grind into the bed a little to relieve some of the pressure. Her resolve was weakening. "Please Santana." Brittany begs again. Santana nods and gently climbs back up Brittany's body and bends down to kiss her gently trying to calm her back down a little. She pulls apart and Brittany looks up into her eyes. "Please." Santana grips her erection and lines herself up, she pushes gently and slips inside Brittany, pressing down with her hips until they were flush against Brittany's and she was all the way inside. "So big." Brittany moans.

Santana pulls out slowly and presses back in, setting a gentle rhythm. She never pulls all the way out, or pushes all the way in trying to minimize the rocking motion. It felt amazing to be inside Brittany again.

Brittany loved how full she felt when Santana was inside of her. She felt herself getting closer and dug her fingers into the muscles of Santana's back. Santana knew that sign and sped up just slightly. She leaned a little more weight onto Brittany's good side so she could reach between them and gently rolled Brittany's clit between her thumb and finger. She watched Brittany's eyes snap shut before she buried her face into Santana's neck moaning her name again. Brittany constricted around her as she came. She worked Brittany down from her orgasm and after a few more thrusts exploded inside of her which brought about another loud moan from Brittany.

"I love feeling you come inside of me." Brittany whispered as she pulled Santana down on top of her tightening her arms. After a few seconds Santana pulled out and rolled to the side slightly so she wasn't pressing down on Brittany's hurt ribs. Brittany ran her fingers through Santana's hair, pressing kisses to her forehead. Santana traced her fingers up and down Brittany's injured side trying not to let her stomach clench at the memory. "We should brush our teeth before we get too comfy and fall asleep." Brittany mumbles.

"Too late." Brittany taps lightly on her back signaling for her to get up. She reluctantly does, as does Brittany and they make their way to the bathroom. They brush their teeth and Brittany heads to the kitchen to get some water and tells Santana she will meet her back in the bedroom. When she comes back in Santana is standing naked in front of the mirror holding her breasts flat and inspecting her reflection. "Do you ever wish I was a boy?" Santana asks knowing Brittany was watching her.

"I have never wished you were anything but what you are. Why? Have you?"

"I just wonder if it would be easier. Those guys wouldn't have hurt us if it was just a guy and a girl kissing in an alleyway. They would have just kept walking." Brittany walks to her side of the bed and puts the bottle of water down and walks back over to Santana. "Your parents might not have ever kicked you out."

"Don't let those things make you feel bad about who you are. I love that person so much Santana". She wraps her arms around Santana's waist from behind. Santana's hands move from holding her breasts back to covering Brittany's hands with her own. "If it weren't for those things that happened recently, you're happy with who you are right?" Santana nodded.

"I don't think I could be a boy."

"That's just fine with me because I love my girlfriend just as she is." She leaned down and kissed the soft skin below Santana's ear before pulling her towards the bed. "And I really hope she's ready to cuddle." She climbs into bed and lays on her side waiting for Santana to lay behind her. She feels the blanket come up and cover them before a warm arm pulls her close.

"I love you."

"Love you too San."

Some part of her knows this isn't real. Some part of her knows it's a nightmare. But that doesn't stop the blinding fear she feels when she finds herself alone in the alley with two men closing in on her. No matter how hard she tries to scream nothing is coming out. She tries to turn around and run but there's no way out. There's brick all around her and the only place to go is blocked by the men who keep coming closer. She starts to cry and then the men's faces, that she'd never forget, come into focus. One of them reaches his hand out and it closes around her throat she tries to push away but pushing against him is like pushing against a wall, he won't budge. She starts to struggle but she feels trapped, like she's being tied down by something. She forces her eyes open and she's in their bedroom. Dark. Santana is sleeping on her stomach right next to her and Brittany was tangled in the blankets. She took a deep breath trying to calm her heart before she scooted closer to Santana trying to take comfort in her body.

Santana felt the bed shift and sleep slip away from her. Brittany was trying to cuddle into her and Santana could hear that she was breathing a little harder than normal. "You k B?" She mumbled out.

"Yeah. Nightmare." Santana rolled onto her side and opened her arms, Brittany pressed her body into Santana's tucking her head into Santana's chest. Santana closed her arms around Brittany, holding her tight. The residual fear slipped away as she tangled their legs together. Santana kissed the top of Brittany's head before making sure they were both covered with the blanket. They both quickly fell back asleep.

The next morning Santana drops her off in front of the dance building with a kiss and a promise that Brittany would meet her for lunch to tell her how things went. Brittany had emailed in advance and scheduled meetings with all of her professors individually. She sat nervously waiting for the first meeting. She couldn't help but try and predict the responses. Her predictions were all over the place. One minute she was sure things were going to be ok, the next she was sure she was going to get kicked out of the department.

Her professor calls her in. "So what's going on Brittany?" Brittany swallows and launches into the story of what happened over break. She showed her the information from the hospital and police reports. "I'm so very sorry this happened to you. But what is it that you need from me?"

"I just wanted to let everyone know. I don't want to get kicked out because I can't dance."

"Darling we would never do that to you. This isn't a debilitating injury. You'll be back for next year. Maybe in my classes, we can talk about starting you on some choreographing. I think you have the talent and this is a good excuse to experiment with that."

"That would be awesome." She always thought she might like choreographing. She hadn't done much of it but she'd like to.

"So you're going to meet with the rest of your dance professors now?" Brittany nods. "Well. Let me give you a note. Just give them this and if they ask any questions go ahead and answer what you feel comfortable answering. Ok? Perks of being head of the department." After a few more minutes of small talk Brittany goes to her next appointment.

The rest of them go just as well. One of her professors suggested a few exercises she can do to help heal a little faster. She was on her way out of the last appointment when she literally runs into Puck. "Blondie! How goes it?" Brittany rubs her side a little while smiling in greeting.

"It's ok. How are you? How was your break?"

"Boring. Just hung out with my little sister and played my guitar. You?"

She gives him a very a brief rundown of what had happened over break. To her surprise she watched Puck's face soften and as soon as she finished he hugged her with a gentleness she wasn't sure he possessed. Puck really was a nice guy. She really wanted Santana to meet him. "Do you want to have lunch with Santana and I?"

"Yeah! I finally get to meet her? Man if she's half as hot as you…" Brittany shot him a warning glance and Puck just laughed. They walked over to the dining hall together and waited outside for Santana to show up. Brittany saw Santana about the same time that Puck did.

Santana walks up and by description knows who Puck is before he even opens his mouth. But then he opens his mouth. "Damn girl. You. Me. Backseat?" Santana ignored him and moved over to Brittany kissing her with a little more passion than she normally would in public. "Oh."

"Yeah. Oh. Puck this is my girlfriend Santana. Santana, Puck."

"So you're the asshole that hits on my girlfriend all the time?" Brittany had kind of expected this from Santana. But there was a lightness in her voice. She wasn't serious.

"In good fun! I'm excited to meet my lesbro's girlfriend!" He sweeps her up in a hug.

"Just. Stop hitting on her." Puck laughs.

"I'll try." They go into the dining hall and Brittany fills Santana in on how it went with her professors. They talked to Puck about what he's doing now that football is over. Santana didn't want to like him, but she kind of couldn't help it. He was an idiot, but totally harmless. Plus he made Brittany laugh, and Santana couldn't be unhappy with anyone that made Brittany happy.

After lunch had ended Santana was outside sitting on the wall with her arms around Brittany who was standing between her legs. "Do you have a minute so we can talk about something?" Brittany nods. "The lawyer called. He tried to call you too but he didn't have your new number. I passed it along in case he needed something. But he has some good news for us."

Brittany steps the half step closer so she's practically pressed against Santana. "What did he say?"

"Those guys pleaded guilty. There was so much evidence against them and so they accepted a plea bargain."

"A what?"

"Like a deal. Sometimes it gives them a few less years in prison. Sometimes it allows for certain other arrangements. The guy that held me back, he's going to get two years in prison. Plus parole. And the guy that hurt you-"

"Us." Brittany corrected.

"Us. He is going to get a maximum of ten years with the option of parole if he displays good behavior."

"Is that good?"

"They are both fair sentences my mami said. You know how you were saying that you were so nervous to go to court and how you wished you didn't have to?"

"Yeah?"

"Now you don't. It's over Britt. They go away, and even when they get out they aren't allowed anywhere near us."

"So we don't have to go back there at all."

Santana shakes her head. "Nope." Brittany sighs and hugs Santana tight. She's grateful. She wanted those guys to get in trouble for what they did, but more than anything she wanted this to be over. She wanted to do her best to not think about it and to move on. It has caused her enough trouble and she can't help but be happy that she won't have to go and potentially tell the story yet another time.

"Good. Are you happy about it?"

"I wish they had gotten put away longer. But I am so happy that we don't have to go through that." Santana leans back and kisses Brittany. "Want to do a movie night at our apartment tonight?" She dragged out the 'our', making Brittany smile. "We can let everyone know the good news all at once so we have to tell the story less."

"Perfect. Do you have to rehearse tonight?"

"No. I'm done trying to please him. It's obvious he doesn't like me. My mom agrees with you that he's jealous. I'm going to rehearse enough to be proud of my work and if he docks me points, then I'll either suck it up or take it up with the head of the department. I have much more important things to focus on. Like movie night with my friends and girlfriend." Santana seemed so settled in her decision. That made Brittany happy. She hated to think that a professor would actually mistreat a student but she spent hours on the floor of the practice rooms listening to Santana play and it was some of the most beautiful music she's ever heard. And it just flows from her. She barely even has to look at her books. She spends most of the time with her eyes closed just playing it. And to have someone hear that and say she's not good enough, there had to be something else going on.

"Good. I'm glad." She leaned back in for another kiss. "So that just means one more class for me and then we're free for the evening."

"Yep. I will pick you up from class and then we can maybe do a snack run or something. Plus I have it on good authority that the ducks are back in the pond. And I may or may not have some bread in the back of my car." Brittany's face lit up at the mention of one of her favorite things to do. Santana loved that she could make Brittany smile like that. Well ducks made her smile. But she thought of feeding them, so really it was her too.

Santana walked Brittany to class a few minutes later and kissed her so many times she was almost late. When Brittany got to class she pulled out her already printed out and reviewed notes, and did her best to follow along with the class. The period went quick and soon she was walking back out of the building and towards the parking lot.

They stopped to feed the ducks first. Sure enough there were a few there. Santana had to remind Brittany to be careful as she almost took off in a full run towards the pond. Santana sat on a mostly dry rock tossing bits of bread to the less eager ducks while she watched Brittany command the attention of the rest of them as she made sure she gave them all equal amounts of bread. After all the bread was gone Brittany sat between Santana's legs for a little while and they just watched the water. "I love you." Santana whispered into Brittany's ear then tucking her nose into Brittany's warm neck.

"I love you too." Santana squeezed a little tighter and felt Brittany shaking a little bit.

"Cold baby?" Brittany nods. "Why didn't you say something. We can go."

"I just liked it out here. It feels peaceful."

"We'll come back. As often as you like. Next time we'll bring a blanket so you're not sitting on cold rock." She's stood up by this point and reaches down to help Brittany up. Santana brushes Brittany's butt off pretending to get something off of it but really it was just an excuse to touch her butt. You can't blame her.

They head to the grocery store to get everybody's favorite snacks before heading back to the apartment. Their friends start to filter in soon. Hugs are given and people start finding their seats. Mike and Tina show up and Brittany has about five seconds of panic before Mike hugs her and lets her know that Rachel told them the abbreviated version and that if she needs anything, they are there for her. "I'm sorry I didn't call you myself."

"No it's ok. You were preoccupied. I get it." She thanks him and he and Tina find a spot on the floor to set up for the movie. Santana feels stupid when she explains what happened with the court because she feels like she is making a speech. But whatever, it's done all at once and she's happy for that.

After the movie starts Sam gets up and goes into the kitchen. Brittany needed to talk to him so she untangled herself from Santana telling her she needs a drink and she heads that way too. "Hey Sam. I need some help."

"With what Britt?"

"Santana's birthday gift. I have an idea but I was wondering if you had anything at your shop."

"What are you looking for?"

"A ukulele. Santana had mentioned a few times that she wanted one and I thought maybe I could get it for her birthday. But I really don't know what they cost and I don't have much to spend."

"I think I can help you out. Could you maybe get a ride to the music shop tomorrow?"

"Yeah. Santana has class late. I'll ask Mike or Puck." They both head back into the living room and Brittany returns to Santana's lap.

Santana hates Tuesday's. Brittany has class all morning, and she has class all evening so other than lunch she knows she won't get to see her again until nine. Which, a few weeks ago would mean she probably wouldn't get to see her again until the next day. She's not sure if it's the accident, or the decision that they would be moving in together anyway, but either way Brittany has spent every night with Santana. And they haven't really discussed Brittany sleeping in her dorm room either. Which Santana prefers. Nothing makes her happier than spending every night wrapped around Brittany, or vice versa.

Brittany plans on calling either Puck or Mike after lunch but as luck would have it, she runs into Puck on her way there. He's standing outside of dining hall with a bunch of his football friends. She walks up to him and before she gets to him she hears some guy point her out as a 'hot piece of ass walking towards us'. Puck whips his head around and sees her before turning back around "That's my bro. Be fucking respectful asshole." He turns around and one arm hugs her. "Hey Britt".

"Hey. Can I ask you a favor?" Puck nods. "Are you busy today after four?"

"Nope."

"Can you take me to the music store? It's too far to walk with my ribs."

"Definitely dude. I need some new strings anyway." She lets him know where to pick her up and gives him a hug before she sees Santana waving at them. She walks towards her intercepting her from talking to Puck just in case he lets something slip.

They ate lunch quickly which meant they had a few minutes to themselves after, which resulted in Santana walking Brittany to her next class. And then a particularly heated make out session in an empty classroom before Santana realized she was going to be late and had to run out trying to adjust herself in her compression shorts.

After tutoring that afternoon Brittany met up with Puck and they went to the music shop where Sam was working. "Ok Sam. Show me what you have." Sam pulled out a small black ukulele from under the counter.

"What do you think about this?"

"It looks pretty. But is it a good one?"

"It's very good. And it's used but looks brand new."

"I guess my last question is can I afford it?"

"What if I told you I could give it to you for forty dollars?"

"What? How?"

"Employee discount plus my boss owed me a favor for working so many opening shifts when he was out of town." Brittany thought it was perfect. Santana would love it and not that it matters but it would look good with her guitar too.

"I'll take it. Thank you so much Sam. She's going to love it." After they checked out and spent a few more minutes hanging out with Sam they left and Puck dropped her back off at her room so she could hide the ukulele there since it was the place Santana was least likely to find it. She sat at her desk and got out her homework. She was having a hard time focusing when her brain started to drift back to make out sessions in empty classrooms.

She was somewhere between developing what might be a real fantasy and trying to finish an assignment when Santana called. "Hey B. I'm on break what are you up to?"

"Homework. Sort of. But mostly thinking about you in an empty classroom. Sexy things."

"Britt," Santana whined. "Not when I have to go back to class." Brittany just laughed. "Are you at the apartment?"

"No. I'm in my dorm room." There was a brief pause.

"Oh." And then another pause. "Are you sleeping there tonight?" Brittany could hear the disappointment in Santana's voice. Good thing she had no intentions of staying in her dorm to begin with.

"Well, I was just planning on hanging out here and maybe showering until you got done with class and could pick me up. But if you need some alone time I understand." Brittany knew what Santana was going to say before she even said it.

"No! You should stay with me. I'll pick you up. But I have to go B. See you after class. Love you!"

"Love you too." She guessed showering really was a viable option since homework clearly wasn't going to pan out for her.

She was already packed and showered when Santana texted her to tell her she was outside. She went outside and got into the car, immediately pulling Santana into her for a deep kiss. "Missed you." Brittany mumbled between kisses. Santana hummed in response. They parted eventually when things started to get a little too heated for the car and Santana drove them back to their apartment.

They went back into the bedroom where kissing resumed. "I was so turned on thinking about sex in that classroom earlier today." She mumbled against Santana's neck as she pressed kisses to the skin there. "I almost touched myself in my dorm room."

Hearing those words hot against her neck made her knees weak. "Why didn't you?"

"Didn't know how. Plus I knew I'd be seeing you soon." They go back to kissing but Santana can't stop the idea that hits her. She gently takes control and starts to walk Brittany back towards the bed until Brittany sits down on it. Santana straddles her, and fevered kissing leads to clothes removal. Once they were naked Santana encouraged Brittany back onto the pillows so that she was laying comfortably on the bed.

"I have an idea." Santana hoped bringing this up wouldn't kill the mood.

"So long as it involved orgasms." Brittany was still breathing hard, having a hard time calming her body down. She could feel how wet she was already.

"I want to watch you touch yourself. If you don't like it, we stop and do whatever you want to do." Brittany hesitates.

"What about you?"

"What about me?"

"Will you touch yourself?" Instead of answering her, Santana grasped her own dick in her hand and started to slowly stroke herself. Brittany watched for just a few seconds before Santana watched her hand travel down her stomach towards her visibly wet slit.

"That's it baby." Santana husked out. Brittany physically couldn't stop herself. Watching Santana touch herself turned her on so much. She circled her clit just like Santana does. She didn't expect it to feel as good, and it doesn't, but it still feels quite wonderful.

Santana gulps as Brittany's finger is circling her clit. She wants to help. She wants to go down on Brittany or at least assist in the fingering but Brittany needed to be more familiar with herself.

It didn't take long before Brittany was whimpering. Santana could tell she wanted more. So without taking her hand off of her own cock, she used the other to take Brittany's hand and gently move it downward. She then positioned Brittany's fingers, and pushed them inside of her. She guided the movements for a few more thrusts before letting Brittany take back over.

Brittany started to go faster. Her fingers didn't feel good as Santana (any part of her) but it still felt good and she could feel herself building up to an orgasm. "Rub your clit too baby." The rasp in Santana's voice made her even more wet as she followed instruction.

Santana was going to come. Any second. She wanted so badly to pull Brittany's fingers out of her and replace them with her dick but she wanted to watch Brittany come. She squeezed the base of her shaft several times trying delay the inevitable. She reached her free hand up and palmed Brittany's breast. Toying with her nipple and making Brittany gasp. She wanted to touch Brittany to help her along but she ended up making it harder on herself to hold back. "I'm gonna come Britt."

Brittany's eyes refocused on what was in front of her as Santana hunched over and stroked herself faster. Brittany moaned just as the first string of come shot out and landed on her stomach. The next on her own hand that was still fingering herself. She rubbed the cum into her as she continued to thrust in and out while clumsily rubbing her clit. She watched through bleary eyes as Santana pumped the last few drops out of her. She thought for a second about how amazing it feels when Santana comes inside of her, the warmth combined with how full she feels. And with that feeling in mind she felt the ball of tension in her lower stomach explode.

Santana watched as Brittany's eyes squeezed shut and her legs started shaking a little. She could tell Brittany was coming and it was almost enough to make her start to get hard again. She reached down and cupped Brittany, forcing her fingers deeper. A small "Santana" squeaked from Brittany's slightly parted lips. When Santana saw Brittany's body become less tense she gently pulled Brittany's fingers from inside of herself before laying down next to her and taking her into her arms. She kissed her gently, waiting for Brittany's breath to return to normal.

It felt good. But not nearly as good as when Santana does it. But watching and feeling Santana come on her had turned her on to a degree that she was not expecting. It was really what pushed her over the edge. She tightened her now working arms around Santana and deepened the kiss just slightly before pulling away. "I like it better when you touch me."

"Me too. But watching was amazing. And now you know how to do it if I'm not there."

"Mhmm." Brittany could feel them sticking together from sweat and specifically the come that was still covering her stomach. "I liked it. I like trying new things."

"We could do it more." Santana suggested. She definitely was on board with that. "Is there anything you want to try."

"Oh I think I could maybe come up with a few things." Brittany whispered seductively in her ear. "But first. Bubble bath. And then a snack caus your stomach is making devil noises." The juxtaposition between seductive Brittany and then immediately into sweet and caring Brittany made her smile. Yeah, she could definitely spend the rest of her life like this.

* * *

Hey I just wrote this, and this is crazy. But feedback is awesome. So review this maybe?

Lyrical.

(That last little gem was unbeta'd so don't blame her. This is what happens when sleep deprivation sets in.)


	23. Chapter 23

**AN:** Sorry for the wait. But I'm already working on the next chapter and I am on break so my life is a tiny less crazy.

Check out the one shot I posted.

Hope you like the chapter. Please review and let us know.

As always thank you to my beta, and thank you to all of you.

* * *

Brittany has always healed quickly. That coupled with high pain tolerance means she's back to teaching within two weeks of the accident. She's still not dancing though. Or not supposed to be dancing. Sometimes she does it without noticing. Like it comes from inside of her or something. She can't just turn that off. But she tries. And she takes it as easy as she can. Sometimes for Santana's sake who still gets worried when Brittany stands up too fast.

She's definitely not dancing in her classes. But true to her professor's word, she's given her an opportunity to choreograph. After the first week of sitting out and watching and commenting, her professor approached her about options for the final, she could either write a paper or choreograph one of the other students in the class. Of course Mike agreed and she's finding that, while she doesn't love it more than dancing herself, she definitely likes choreographing.

It's been working out that the nights she is working with Mike are also the nights Santana has night class or is in the rehearsal rooms. Which Santana is thankful for because she hasn't spent a night without Brittany in weeks. They haven't talked much about what happened with Brittany's parents after they worked out all of the immediate problems that came after it. Sometimes Santana feels a little guilty when she thinks about how happy she is that Brittany is moving in with her because she knows that it's mostly because of what happened. But maybe not. It might have happened anyway. Either way it still feels like a dream every time she wakes up and Brittany is still there, in her arms.

Sometimes Santana has nightmares. She knows Brittany does too. But Brittany forgets a lot of hers when she wakes up, or so she says. Santana can't. She wishes she could. But every once in awhile she'll have a nightmare that Brittany died, or was hurt even worse than she was. If she manages to not wake Brittany on those nights (she usually does) Brittany can still tell the next day when Santana is just a little more protective, or stands just a little closer all the time. Tonight though, Brittany wakes up. At first she thinks Santana is actually awake talking to her but as soon as she's a little more aware of her surroundings she realizes that Santana is just mumbling her name and moving a lot. It's pretty obvious what's going on so Brittany patiently strokes Santana's face, kissing her forehead and waking her gently. As soon as Santana wakes she curls herself into Brittany who holds her tight.

"Still here San. Still ok. Love you so much." Brittany mumbles sleepily.

"I'm sorry Britt."

"S'ok baby. What's your favorite flavor of juice?" Santana smiles because Brittany already knows that answer but she's trying to distract her so she plays along because it helps. Brittany always knows how to help.

"Apple usually. But sometimes kiwi-strawberry."

"That is good. What are we doing this weekend?"

"Mercedes is having a party. Remember? Because Sam finished his Sophomore film."

"Oh yeah. When does that show?" Brittany was more awake now. This was not uncommon. Post nightmare conversation time. She even enjoyed it.

"Not sure. We'll have to ask. Do you want to drink tomorrow?"

"Nope. But that doesn't mean you shouldn't. I've been feeling like I have a cold coming on and I don't want to tempt it. I'll stay sober and make sure you get across the street and home safe." She smiled as she kissed the top of Santana's head.

"You sure?"

"Absolutely." Santana started to roll so that she was on top of Brittany so that she could kiss her. One kiss turned into lots of kisses and pretty soon Brittany was panting beneath her. Santana ran her hand up Brittany's leg to her underwear and dipped below to find Brittany was already soaked. She dipped her fingers into the wet heat and circled her clit a few times. Brittany reached down and pulled her own underwear down before reaching up and pulling Santana's boxers down. She grasped her shaft lightly, pumping a few times before aligning it with her center. Santana rolled her hips, penetrating Brittany, and kissing her to silence the moan.

This kind of sex never lasted long for either of them. It was quick and lovely but gentle. Santana continue to thrust in and out of Brittany while her head pressed into the side of Brittany's neck. "You fill me so uh good Santana." Brittany whispered in her ear. Santana repositioned herself so she could angle up on her thrusts repeatedly rubbing against Brittany's g-spot. Brittany reached down and started to circle her own clit as she looked up into Santana's eyes. After a few more seconds Brittany's walls clenched down and she started to shake. The added tightness and the knowledge that Brittany was coming pushed her over the edge as well.

They brought each other down with gentle touches and whispers of "I love you". Santana loved when it happened like that. Completely unplanned and unexpected. Just a quick and necessary fulfillment of their need for each other. Sated and calm, they both fall into dreamless sleep.

On Friday evening after classes and a quick nap they get ready for the party. Or try really. Because Brittany is walking around in underwear and a bra and Santana is finding it really hard to focus. Brittany knows too. But she likes the way it makes her feel when Santana looks at her like that. Plus focusing isn't so easy for her either as Santana definitely spent longer than necessary choosing something to wear while completely naked. "Something wrong babe?" She looks over her shoulder and smirks at Santana.

Santana's response comes in the form of stepping closer to Brittany and wrapping her arms around her from behind. "We don't have to go. We could stay here." She kisses the back of Brittany's neck already knowing that they're going to this party no matter how much she'd rather get back in bed. Brittany wants to see friends. It's not that she doesn't. She's just not really remembering that right now.

"San…"

"I know B. I'm joking. Get dressed though. Please. Or we really won't be leaving." She smacked Brittany's butt lightly and walked back over to the mirror to finish her makeup. Half an hour later and they're both ready, somehow magically before Quinn. But she follows shortly and they walk across the parking lot to Mercedes' apartment.

The party is fun. Their friends are there. The drinks are good. No drama, which Santana is particularly fond of. Brittany is somewhere nearby talking to Mercedes and Santana is trying to remember how much alcohol to add to the juice. She knows there's a magic ratio. She just mostly never achieves it.

An hour later the ratio doesn't even matter. She can't taste the alcohol anymore so everything is awesome. Even Rachel isn't too bad when she feels like this. They're talking about music, which normally she tries not to talk about constantly but right now it doesn't seem to matter. "How long have you been playing the piano Santana?"

"Since I was three. That's..." She tries to do the math. "It's a lot of fucking years Berry."

"Santana" hiccup "is a prodigy babe. She's 'mazing" Quinn is a little drunk too. Rachel looks a little jealous and like she's going to open her mouth and mention something that will pull focus back to her but Santana gets distracted by Sam shoveling fistfulls of popcorn in his mouth and decides she'd rather do that than listen to Rachel.

Brittany vaguely wonders where Santana is before trying to bring herself back to the conversation at hand. Artie is trying to talk to her about multi media something or another. Collaboration. He wants to add video and technology to dance. The way he describes it sounds interesting. And honestly, as long as she gets to dance she's game for just about anything. "Britt?!" She turns her head and sees Quinn walking toward her. "I think San needs you. She's doing the crying thing and she's sad." Quinn is a little bit drunk but not too drunk that Brittany doesn't believe her. So she gets up with a short apology to Artie and heads to the kitchen where she last saw Santana.

She finds her quickly enough. She's is hanging off of Sam (who looks a little sad himself) and crying pretty hard but Brittany knows better than to get too scared. Santana is a weepy drunk. This is almost always true. If you catch her right before she's hit the 'too much' point you can usually distract her before the tears start. But because she doesn't drink often, and her tolerance is pretty low, crying is just a thing that happens. "What's wrong baby?" She cooed gently, pushing some hair behind her ear.

"B-Britt?" Brittany nods as Santana focuses on her face. Yeah. She's had just a little too much alcohol. She lets her arms drop from around Sam and turns into Brittany who hugs her tightly.

"Tell me what's wrong honey."

"I was talking to Sam a-about how awesome orange juice i-is." Brittany nods because, sure. Why not? Orange juice is pretty awesome. "A-and then I was just like what if you had died?" There it is. Brittany pulls her in tighter. She doesn't know a better way to remind Santana how alive she is. Brittany presses kisses to Santana's tear wet cheek and after a few seconds of holding her she pulls away slightly.

"Let's go sit down. Ok?" Santana nods and makes a pathetic little noise of agreement before Brittany pulls her into the living room and over to an arm chair which happens to be the only available seat. She sits down and goes to pull Santana down so that she's sitting in her lap. Before she can Santana takes her own initiative and lays down on top of Brittany, curled into a little ball with her face buried into her neck. Brittany laughs lightly as she wraps her arms around Santana who is nuzzling and sighing small content sighs. If this is all she needs to feel better than Brittany is more than willing to do it. But she does wonder if there's something more that needs done. Her nightmares have mostly passed but Santana's haven't. She can't imagine having to see what Santana did and she's not sure how to help her cope with that and maybe wonders if Santana doesn't need someone professional to help her cope. Now is definitely not the time to talk about it with her either way.

Quinn walks over to them a few minutes later asking silently if Santana was ok. Brittany smiles and nods. "You're ruining your rep Lopez. Snuggling in front of all of these people." Quinn has no seriousness in her voice, she's just teasing. Santana half heartedly lifts her head and turns towards Quinn.

"Shuddup I'm tough!" She slurs. Brittany thinks she might be trying to get up to prove it so she opens her arms but Santana quickly burrows herself back into her. "No don't stop cuddling me!" Brittany laughs as she tightens her arms back around her.

"So tough." Quinn mumbles as she walks away. Several minutes later Santana's breathing has evened out and she's making sleeping sounds. She contemplates waking her up so she can walk her back home and put her to bed.

"Want me to carry her?" Puck asks as he walks over. He assumed Santana was asleep.

"Yeah. Maybe. My ribs aren't quite up for that." He nods knowingly and bends down and lifts Santana off of Brittany. She wishes she could carry her. She could. If she wasn't hurt it wouldn't even be a problem. She just prefers Santana in her arms. But she's grateful either way so she runs and grabs their things and they head out. Santana managed to sleep through leaving the party and most of the way back but when they were almost across the parking lot she stirred awake.

"Br...Puck? Wha du fuck! Put me down!" She drunkenly struggled enough for Puck to set her down for fear of dropping her. She wrapped her arms around Brittany, leaning on her for support. "Stop hitting on my girlfriend!" She slurred. Puck just laughed and after silently asking Brittany if she could handle it, he waved and turned around to head back to the party. "Where are we?"

"We are going home. It's bed time." Brittany pulled her key out of her bag and let them into the house. She walked Santana back to the bedroom before going to get the kitchen to get some water. When she got back to the bedroom Santana was sitting where she had left her with her head down looking ashamed and on the verge of tears again.

"Are you mad cause I got to drunk?" She sniffed. Brittany set the water down and kneeled in front of her taking Santana's hands in her own.

"No. Not at all. I'm tired too. I was ready to go. Ok?" She leaned up to kiss a tan cheek which brought out a shy little smile from Santana. "Just underwear tonight?"

"Naked cuddles." Santana puts her arms up so Brittany will take her shirt off for her before getting herself out of her own bra. Brittany hands her the aspirin and water before taking her own clothes off and climbing in bed. Santana clumsily follows after shutting off the lamp. "Can I be the little spoon?" Santana gets into the little spoon position before Brittany even answers. Brittany wraps her arms around Santana and kisses her upper back before whispering their goodnights and falling asleep.

April flies by. Even when Brittany sits down to think about it she can barely figure out where it went. She's glad she got Santana's birthday gift early because it kind of snuck up on her. Final pressure is already weighing on her. Plus choreographing takes just as much time as dancing. Which she doesn't mind. Because the experience has been amazing all around, but definitely time consuming. Santana has been busy too between practicing and having to fill in for one of her professors as a rehearsal pianist for a nearby theatre company. Santana decided that she didn't want a big party or anything, so they are just going to do game night on Saturday and probably let it be an early night. Everyone is tired.

Brittany saw Sam and Puck waiting outside of the dining hall talking to a few other guys Brittany didn't recognize. She thought maybe she should remind them of game night. Sam wouldn't forget, Mercedes wouldn't let him. But Puck, he probably forgot five minutes after she invited him. "Man I've got them almost convinced of this threesome idea." She hears Puck telling the group of guys as she walks up to them. Before she has a chance to alert them of her presence Puck catches sight of her and pulls her into their circle. "What's up blondie?"

"Just reminding you about Saturday. San's Birthday." The look on Puck's face says he clearly forgot. Brittany tried not to look smug. It's hard to say 'I told you so' when you never actually told anyone so. But whatever, she knew he forgot.

"Oh yeah. I mean. Yes. I'll be there."

"Cool. What were you guys talking about?" She has a few minutes to kill and would rather not stand around by herself.

"These two cheerleaders are both into be so I'm trying to get a threesome out of it." She had honestly never thought about a threesome. And even after just a second of doing so she realizes that the idea doesn't really appeal to her.

"That sounds weird."

"No way! Anyone with a dick wants a threesome. That is just truth." He high fives one of the guys next to him. She rolls her eyes at them and then pats Sam's arm and waves as she walks away towards the dining hall to wait for Santana inside. The idea seems silly to her. But she can't help but think about if there was some bit of truth in Puck's statement. She wonders exactly how you even bring that up with someone?

Saturday morning Brittany wakes Santana up with sweet kisses and even sweeter words. The Lopez family was coming for a late breakfast. When Brittany had called to schedule it she had requested that it not be early. They hadn't been sleeping much and since it was Santana's birthday, she deserved to sleep in. "Happy birthday baby." Brittany whispers as she leans in for a kiss when Santana finally opens her eyes.

"Mmmm. Thank you." Santana loves being woken by Brittany. It solves that whole waking up on the wrong side of the bed thing. She especially loves it when it's not to get up and leave her to go to class or vice versa. She gets to spend the entire day with her and what more could she want for her birthday? Not that she's not excited to see her family, or for game night tonight. But for her, it's pretty much always Brittany.

They meet the Lopez family at a restaurant about twenty minutes away, so they don't have to drive the entire way into town. "I can't even deal with the fact that our baby sister is 20 years old now. You were twelve like, yesterday." Miguel hugs her before hugging Brittany. After a round of hugs (several from Maribel) they all head into the restaurant. After they eat and while they are waiting for dessert, Santana gets her birthday gifts. A keyboard for her iPad, gift cards, and new head phones.

"Brittany, we need to get you all moved into the apartment. After finals during regular dorm move out I'm assuming?" Brittany glances over at Santana. It doesn't really matter. She hasn't stayed in her dorm since spring break started. But not having to deal with that now while they're getting prepared for finals in a week would probably be best.

"I think so. I don't have a lot of stuff."

"That's fine. Your mother and I will bring the SUV down then. And we can go shopping after and get anything you girls might need. More towels or pillows or whatever." Santana laughs at her father's attempt to list things that they might need. He throws his napkin at her.

"You don't have to buy me anything. You already do so much for me."

"Nonsense dear. You're going to have to get over this. You're family. If Santana needed something we would buy it for her. You should expect the same treatment." Before Brittany could even protest, or thank Maribel (she wasn't sure which was going to come out of her mouth) she changed the subject. "Santana what did Brittany get you for your birthday?"

"Oh I haven't given it to her yet! We were running late to get here." Santana smiles over at Brittany. She thought for sure Brittany would have cracked and told her what she had gotten her. She had been excited about it for weeks. But she managed to keep it a secret.

When breakfast was over they all got hugs. Antonio, last in line, hugged them both and snuck forty dollars in both of their hands like Maribel didn't know he was going to do it. He winked at them and they all got into their cars and headed off. Santana noticed that Brittany was being quiet, and still hadn't put the money in her pocket. "I'm sorry if they overwhelm you Britt. They just want you to feel like family."

"No. I shouldn't complain. Amazing people are doing amazing things for me. I'll figure out how to accept it. It's just, do you have any idea when the last time my parents just handed me forty dollars? They gave me money. But it always came with some sort of guilt. Even when I was little. But your dad just handed me that money. Nothing else. No 'that's all we're giving you so make it last' or 'are you ever going to find a way to support yourself'. Everytime something nice like that happens, it feels a little like a trick at first. Or like I need to figure out why..."

"He just wanted you to have some cash in your pocket. Just in case you wanted something. They just want you to be happy and comfortable B. That's all they want for any of us. They still try and slip my brothers money."

"I know. And I love them. Your whole family. It's just going to take some getting used to." Santana nodded her understanding and squeezed Brittany's hand just a little tighter.

When they got back to the apartment Brittany made Santana sit on the bed while she went to the closet and pulled out the oddly shaped package. She handed it to Santana and waited, holding her breath, while she opened it. She was almost positive she was going to love it.

Santana unwrapped the shiny black ukulele with wide eyes. It was beautiful. And she had been wanting one for a while now. It even kind of coordinated with her acoustic guitar. "B. This is awesome!" She stood up and kissed Brittany who looked just as excited as Santana felt.

"I'm glad you like it. I thought you would." She leaned in to kiss Santana again, and then again, and one more time. She didn't want to distract her from her brand new toy so she pulled away. "I'm going to go shower. You play. Then while you shower I'll set up for when people start showing up."

Later that evening people start showing up. Not a lot of people had been invited, just the usual suspects. They had some board games and some video games set up to go. After Puck and Sam arrive they started playing Rock Band. Brittany just watched. She wasn't very good at it. Plus Santana promised they could play Just Dance in a little bit. But right now she was perfectly content to sit back and watch Santana have fun. "We gotta take a break guys. I need a drink." Puck had taken a few turns as singer and was getting a little horse. They all agree and pause the game.

"I'm going to go pee while he does that. Keep my spot warm." Santana kisses Brittany and pats her thigh before she gets up and heads to the bathroom.

Puck had gotten his drink but decided he should probably take a leak before things get heated again. Everyone was in the living room so he didn't bother knocking on the bathroom door. When he pushed it open he saw Santana standing there, but she was definitely peeing. "Puck close the fucking door!" She screamed at him as soon as she saw him. That shocked him out of his confusion and he shut the door. Brittany hears Santana yell from the living room so she gets up to see what is going on. She gets to the bathroom just as Santana was coming out.

When Santana gets out of the bathroom she expects Puck to bring it up. She's glad Brittany is magically there. "Dude why were you peeing standing up?" Brittany tensed next to her and she felt her hand on the small of her back. She took comfort in her proximity.

"I was born with a penis. All girl. Just with a penis." She sticks with simple knowing that he'll ask a million questions to clarify. Most people do. Or they get awkward, which she really hopes doesn't happen. She wouldn't admit it to him, but she really likes Puck. And the idea of losing him as a friend over something like this makes her sad. She's just waiting for the questions to come.

Except, they never do. Puck's face breaks out into a smile before he says "Awesome! You should have told me earlier. We could have been trading embarrassing boner stories. Oh you know what would be awesome! We should compare size! No. Nevermind. No. Because you are half the size of me and if your junk is anywhere near the size of mine I might get a complex."

"Good because you weren't going to see it anyway." Brittany responds, mostly jokingly.

"Calm down B. It's all yours." He puts his hands up in surrender. "Come on. We got a high score to beat on Rock Band." They turn to go back into the living room. He notices that Santana is still a little surprised. "Seriously bro. This is one thousand percent ok. No worries. Alright?" She nods and he claps her on the back a little harder than she had been prepared for and she stumbled forward. They both laughed and she shoved him back and that was the end of that.

Everyone was having fun. But Santana was yawning. And Brittany still had one last plan for the evening that really wasn't going to work out if Santana is too tired. A few minutes later Puck got a call and suddenly had to leave, Brittany suspects a hook up is involved. After that people seem to realize that it actually is getting late, and while it's the weekend, finals are still quickly approaching. Everybody's got studying to do. But not Brittany, not tonight. She's got Santana.

Everyone's gone and Brittany tells Quinn that she promises she will clean up in the morning. Quinn sees the glint in her eye and quickly texts Rachel to let her know she's sleeping with her tonight.

Santana looks around, about to clean up when Brittany grabs her hand and pulls her back to the bedroom. "Babe we gotta clea-"

"Tomorrow." Brittany had gotten excited and now this was just as much for her as it was for Santana. There was no denying that. Santana was confused for about a second before she had figured out where this might be going.

Brittany opened the door and pulled Santana in before shutting the door and pushing her up against it, pressing her lips to Santana's firmly. "Want you." Brittany moaned into her mouth. She slowed down the kiss a little before pulling back and taking a few steps backward. Santana followed. "Stay." Brittany told her.

There was no music, and that might have made this better, but she wasn't going to stop and fumble with the iPod. She stayed a few steps away from Santana and started to move her hips to the ever present internal rhythm. She removed her clothes piece by piece watching Santana's body language shift rapidly. She started shifting as she started to get hard, and she took a few tiny steps towards Brittany like she couldn't stop herself. Brittany smirked and turned around pulling her skirt off and bending over much further than she needed to.

Santana licked her lips. That view. She watched Brittany slowly stand back up and turn around. She was wearing a lingerie set that Santana had never seen before. But she hoped she'd see it again. Black and white lace panties that showed the curve of Brittany's ass and a matching bra that made her almost want to not take it off. Almost. She took a step forward and reached her arms out and pulling Brittany's body into hers. "So sexy baby." Brittany bit her bottom lip before leaning in a placing a gentle kiss to her lips. Santana tried to deepen it but Brittany pulled away before she could, sinking to her knees, keeping eye contact the whole time. She reached up and undid the button on Santana's jeans before pulling them down with her underwear.

She finally broke eye contact to look at Santana's semi-erect dick. She placed small kisses to it before lifting it with her hand and taking the head into her mouth. She heard Santana sigh happily above her as she took more and more of her length into her mouth. When she had taken as much as she could into her mouth she sucked gently.

Santana's hands instinctively went to Brittany's head. She barely had any time to worry about Brittany feeling forced before she felt and heard her moan around her now fully erect penis. She wove her fingers into silky blonde locks. "Fuck. Britt. So good." A piece of hair fell into Brittany's face blocking Santana's view of what Brittany was doing. She tucked it behind her ear before brushing her thumbs over Brittany's cheek, holding her face gently. The contact made it feel more amazing for Santana and she was quickly approaching orgasm. But she wanted to make Brittany feel good. She stopped Brittany, pulling her to her feet, and passionately kissing her. "You are so amazing." She told her between kisses. She started to walk Brittany back towards the bed, not breaking their kiss. She kicks her pants off somewhere between where they were and the bed.

When Brittany feels the back of her legs hit the mattress she reaches to the hem of Santana's shirt and pulls it off over her head, breaking the kiss for just a moment. They took a moment to remove the rest of their clothes before Santana gently pushes Brittany back onto the bed and kneels over the top of her. Brittany reaches up and brushes her fingers across Santana's cheek. "You're so beautiful Santana."

"I love you." It was the only way Santana could think to respond. She felt Brittany reach down and guide Santana into her. She pressed her hips forward until she was in as far as she could go.

Brittany loved the feeling of Santana filling her. She moaned as Santana started thrusting into her. She curled her leg around the back of Santana, allowing her to slip a little further in. Santana leaned down to kiss Brittany again. Santana wanted to go deeper. She wanted to be even closer. She wanted to make Brittany feel even better. She ran her hand along Brittany's other thigh before hesitating. "Do it Santana." Brittany whispered, knowing what Santana wanted.

She stilled her thrusting, buried deep inside. "I don't want to hurt you."

"Baby do you have any idea how flexible I am?" Santana swallowed at that. She lifted Brittany's leg gently before Brittany took over. Pulling her leg back and putting it over Santana's shoulder causing Santana to slip even further inside.

Santana took a deep breath calming the urge to come at the sight of Brittany like this. After a second she started moving in and out again. The angle had her brushing Brittany's g-spot on every stroke, causing Brittany to moan her name even louder. "Harder." She gasped out. Santana started thrusting harder alternating between kissing Brittany and pulling back to watch her. "So close."

Santana felt Brittany reach between them and circle her own clit. Santana was going to explode any second. "Baby come with me." She whispered into Brittany's lips. She felt Brittany start to shake and her muscles clench around her dick. She was so close and Brittany's orgasm pushed her over the edge. She presses herself in as deep as she could before coming hard. She couldn't hold her weight anymore and collapsed on top of Brittany burying her face into her neck. They were both covered in a layer of sweat.

"That was amazing." Brittany whispered into her ear. "So amazing." She stroked Santana's long brown hair away from her face before turning her head and kissing her cheek. They could both still feel the aftershocks in their bodies. Santana tried to prop herself back up but Brittany held her down."Stay inside just a little longer." Santana nods before recapturing Brittany's lips in a series of sweet kisses.

Santana feels Brittany shake lightly beneath her. "You're cold baby."

"A little."

"Ok. Under the blankets then." Santana propped herself up and gently slid her now soft penis out of Brittany. That feeling was not her favorite part. She crawled up the bed and pulled the blankets up helping Brittany slide underneath and into her arms. She pulled her body close and held her tight helping to warm her up.

"I loved the new lingerie set."

"I thought you might. I wanted to do something extra for you."

"It was amazing. Today was amazing." Brittany was pleased with herself for making Santana's birthday good. "I want to keep trying new positions. I like when we do that."

"Me too." Brittany hesitated for a moment. "Are there… other things you want to try?"

"What do you mean?" She kissed the back of Brittany's neck urging her to continue.

She thought maybe just coming right out with it might be better. "Do you ever think about having a threesome?"

"What?! No!" Santana took a deep breath. "I mean, do you?"

"No! Not even a little bit." Brittany rotated in Santana's arms so she was now facing her. "I overheard Puck say something about how anyone with a penis wants a threesome. And I just wanted to make sure you didn't want something you weren't getting."

"First of all, don't listen to Puck about anything that isn't football. Second, You are absolutely all I want. Ever. The idea of a threesome isn't even remotely exciting to me. Ok? Just you." Brittany smiled brightly before leaning in for a kiss.

"I love you so much. I'm glad you feel that way. I don't think I could handle watching you touch another girl."

"I couldn't touch another girl. Or see you touch another person. So we're agreed then. Just us." Brittany nods before leaning back in for a languid kiss. The kiss got a little messy as they both started to drift off. They pulled apart and Santana tucked Brittany under her chin and ran her fingers up and down her spine as she felt her muscles go slack and her mumbled I love yous turn into steady deep breaths.


	24. Chapter 24

**AN:** I am sorry for this wait, but you know that. If you can't write, you can't write. But I forced my way through it.

I hope you like it at least a little. We're closing in on the end here pretty soon.

Thank you to my Beta as always. And extra thank you to those of you who were patient and lovely, and even those of you who were less patient.

* * *

Brittany was nervous about finals week. She knew she was better prepared this semester then she had been last semester. But that didn't stop the nerves. Santana recognized this early on and had helped her make a very strict schedule that included plenty of time for sleeping and eating. There were even designated time blocks for cuddling. Which Brittany has found might be just as important as eating and sleeping. Her tutor was also more helpful than Brittany could have ever hoped for. She had extra sessions scheduled for the week of finals, as well as the week that had led up to it.

Dance wasn't her concern. She and Mike had rehearsed a lot and she knew he was going to dance beautifully and that was the best she could hope for. Whether or not her professors would like her choreography was another story. But she was pretty confident.

Rachel's dads had been really nice as well. They had stopped sending her game requests for Words With Friends (which she never won anyway) so she could focus on studying. They also sent care packages to both her and Rachel with candy, some fun pencils, iTunes gift cards, and a gift card to a restaurant nearby with specific instructions that they were to be used for a date night for each of them.

Most of their time was spent, like last year, in a study room in the library. Santana studying what she needed to, but mostly there to keep Brittany focused. Even though sometimes she served as more of a distraction. Occasionally she'd find herself on top of Brittany, pressing her into the table several minutes into a makeout session. But it couldn't be helped. Neither of them were complaining anyway.

Brittany only had one project and two tests standing between her and a wonderful summer. She and Santana had both been hired to work for their separate departments teaching classes at a summer arts camp. Brittany would be teaching hip hop, Santana would be teaching guitar and piano. It was exciting because she'd get to dance again (the doctors said she would be ok to start the week after finals) and she would be making some additional money. She was still going to be teaching her weekend dance class as well. Plus the summer meant lots of time with Santana. They had talked about times they would be able to go home and visit Santana's parents, and things they wanted to do in NYC. She could already tell it was going to be the best summer of her life.

She worked hard, early, so that she could turn her project in and get it out of the way. The rest of the time was spent studying for her tests. By time she walked into the first of the two tests, she knew she was as prepared as she could possibly be. As soon as that one was finished, she moved onto studying for the next.

When she walked out of her last final Friday afternoon she was elated. It had gone well, she was pretty sure. Plus it was beautiful outside and she was done. She had finished her first year of college. She pushed the door open, thinking about what else she needs to do today, when she hears her name being called. She looks in the direction and sees Santana standing against her car smiling at her. When Brittany gets to her, Santana takes her into her arms. "Go on a celebratory date with me?" Before Brittany even answers Santana pulls her down for a kiss.

"Mmmmm. But packing?"

"After. I miss seeing you without books in your hands. Let's just go to dinner." Santana smiles sweetly at her.

"I'd have to change."

"You already look beautiful." How could Brittany say no to that? So she didn't.

They went to a casual place nearby that they eat at maybe too often. But they like it, and people don't stare at them when they kiss because the crowd is fairly young. Santana is having a hard time keeping her hands off of Brittany. She just wants to be closer to her, as close as she can. Brittany, of course, loves the attention. After dinner they walk out and Santana walks Brittany to her side of the car. Instead of opening it, she backs Brittany up against it until she's pressing her gently into the door. "I've wanted to do this all evening." She murmurs as she leans up and claims Brittany's lips in a heated kiss.

It surprises Brittany at first. Santana isn't big on PDA and this is certainly that. But she can barely dwell on it for a second before Santana's tongue is brushing over her lips. The kiss continues to heat up, Brittany making barely there noises into Santana's mouth. The noises make Santana press herself further into Brittany. "Baby you're getting hard." She mumbles in between kisses. Santana knew that, but she wasn't interested in stopping. Brittany puts her hands on Santana's collar bone, pushing her back gently, forcing them to separate. "Let's go home." Santana nods, placing one more gentle kiss to Brittany's jaw, before stepping back so she could open Brittany's door for her.

They just barely make it to Santana's bedroom before Brittany's clothes start flying off. As soon as the door shuts they are back to kissing, clothes being removed during short breaks for air. Brittany crawls back onto the bed and Santana follows. She reaches her hand between Brittany's legs and wastes no time running a finger through her folds. "You're so wet."

"Mmm. Want you inside. Now." She leans up to kiss Santana again as she moves into position. Santana grips her cock, lines it up with Brittany's center, and is quickly pushing into her. The loud moan that escaped Brittany's lips was more than enough confirmation that she should keep going.

"So tight. Fuck baby. You feel so good." Santana spoke hotly into Brittany's ear. Other than a few whispered directions, there was little talking after that. Santana thrusted into Brittany with an urgency that spoke to how little time they had spent with each other in private, not sleeping, over the past week and a half. It was quick, but extremely satisfying, as they both came at nearly the same time. Santana stilled, the last of her strength draining into Brittany as she collapsed on top of her.

"So good." Brittany's voice cracked. She ran her fingers through Santana's dark hair. "I love you." She heard Santana respond into her neck. She knew in the back of her mind that there was something she needed to do. But right now, there was no where else she could imagine being.

A phone ringing distantly pulls Brittany out of her sleep. She feels Santana reaching for it as she opens her eyes. Brittany is laying on her stomach half on top of Santana, the sheet covering their legs but little else. She laughs quietly as Santana reaches around blindly for the phone, refusing to open her eyes. Brittany herself hasn't quite shaken the warm sleep feeling. But Santana is naked. And then phone has stopped ringing. Her lips turn up as she repositions herself and starts to lay gentle wet kisses on Santana's naked breast and a lingering kiss on her nipple. Santana's breath quickens and her hand threads into Brittany's hair. Brittany starts to kiss her way down when the phone starts ringing again. "Fuck." Santana yells. Now much more awake, she rolls over and grabs her phone.

"Yeah Mami you woke us up." Brittany knows she should behave. Santana's on the phone with her mother.

"Ok." But she can't help it. She starts kissing Santana's stomach as innocently as she can when you're thinking about how badly you want to go down on your girlfriend.

"T-twenty minutes? Ok see you then. Bye." She hurried off the phone. But just as she went to thread her fingers through Brittany's hair she jumped off the bed. "Baby what are you-"

"I completely forgot we were moving out today. Shit. Babe I was supposed to pack last night." It would be funny to Santana if Brittany didn't look so panicked. She was standing there wringing her fingers like she forgot the first step of getting dressed.

"Babe stop. It's fine. Come here." She reached out and Brittany took her hand allowing Santana to pull her back onto the bed. Santana hugs her.

"I just don't want them to get mad or feel inconvenienced or change their minds about me moving in here."

"That's not going to happen baby. You don't even have that much stuff. Plus they're used to moving me. I'm sure they assume they'll have to pack too. You've got to let go of the idea that they're just going to up and stop loving you Britt. Even if you did frustrate them, which I doubt you could do, that doesn't stop someone from loving you. Ok?" Brittany nods against her.

"Ok. But we maybe should at least beat them there." Santana kisses her forehead before she releases her hold and lets Brittany get back up to get dressed. Santana stands up and groans at her semi. Brittany looks over and notices what Santana is groaning about.

"I'm sorry San. That's my fault."

"You think?" Santana laughs back at her. "It's fine. It'll go down soon. Just please put clothes on." They both finished getting dressed and grabbed some poptarts and head to Brittany's room.

Thankfully she already had boxes there that she had gotten earlier in the week when she had every intention of packing on Friday. But now that she was here, Santana was right as usual. She really didn't have that much stuff. They were there for about fifteen minutes setting out boxes and trying to get organized before Santana's parents showed up. They went down to meet them to bring them upstairs. Antonio, Maribel, and Gabe had all come to help.

After hugs were exchanged they all walked upstairs. Brittany was still a little nervous that they were going to be frustrated with her. But of course they weren't. Maribel just started asking questions about what Brittany wanted packed where and Antonio and Gabe stood awkwardly in the corner asking if there was anything heavy that needed carried down.

Things were moving really quickly. Santana was going through Brittany's desk sorting papers. Most of them were easily put into keep or throw away piles. "Hey Britt do you need this?" She holds up an envelope that it looks like Brittany filled out but hadn't sent.

"Oh yeah. I need to put a copy of my birth certificate in it and send it. I've needed to do that for months." Santana put the envelope in the keep pile and made a mental note to remind Brittany to do that later when a thought hit her. They hadn't gotten anything out of Brittany's house when they went to talk to her parents and they had kicked her out. What if Brittany didn't have any of that stuff that she needed.

"Babe. Do you have your birth certificate?" She asked gently. She didn't want to upset Brittany. She just wanted to know so that they could start dealing with it if she didn't have all of that stuff.

"Yep. It's in the box in the closet."

"Thank God. I got scared that it was at your house somewhere."

"No. I pretty much took everything important with me when I left for school. It's all in the box. It's where I keep important stuff." Brittany walked over to the closet and pulled out a box smaller than a shoe box and handed it to Santana.

"Can I look?" Santana asked. Brittany nodded and turned back to folding up her blankets on her bed and stuffing them in a bag. Santana opened the box and the very top layer was a stack of little notes that she had written Brittany, a few pictures of them together, some movie tickets and a few other little things. Santana smiled. They needed more to contribute. They needed a bigger box. Under that was some papers and Brittany's birth certificate, her social security card, and a small stack of pictures. "Are these baby pictures of you?" Brittany smiled and nodded.

They were precious. Brittany was the cutest little baby. "I'm glad you have at least some of your baby pictures Britt. That you didn't lose all of them."

"That is all of them." She shrugged. "I assumed they wouldn't miss them." She grabs the bag of packed blankets and kisses Santana on the cheek. "I'm going to run this down I'll be right back." She walks out leaving Santana there still holding the box.

Maribel watches as Santana walks out with an unusual expression on her face. She was holding a small box and walked in the opposite direction of the stairs that took them down to the truck. She follows her out of curiosity and finds Santana leaning against a wall in the bathroom wiping a tear away.

"What's wrong mija?" Maribel asks carefully. Not wanting to invade her daughters privacy, but not being able to help it either. Santana sniffs wiping away another tear before it even really falls.

"I just hate being reminded of Brittany's past. I hate how her parents never, I don't know, cherished her. It just upsets me."

"What happened Santana?" Maribel was still confused.

"It's stupid." Santana responds, but hands her mother the box anyway. "These are all of the pictures that Brittany's parents had of her. They all fit in this little box. Her whole life." Santana was getting worked up again. But now Maribel understood. They had several albums full of pictures for each child, not to mention boxes of ones that never made it in the albums. Pictures documenting everything they could. She hugs Santana tight.

"We'll just have to make up for it and take more pictures. Ok?" Santana nods. She knows her mother already has some at her house of them from past visits. She'll have to get copies. "Plus I know you and Brittany are going to over photograph your babies." That made Santana smile. She has stopped choking everytime her mother brings up babies, because honestly the thought makes her so happy. "Plus today isn't a sad day. Your girlfriend is moving in with you! This is a big day!" Santana nods and smiles before hugging her mother one last time before they head back into Brittany's room to finish packing and moving her out.

They were done packing in what felt like no time at all. Moving everything into the apartment was even quicker. They stayed to help Brittany unpack, and Maribel insisted on them both packing up winter stuff and taking it back to the house with them so they would have more room. They get most of the way done before Santana decides they can do the rest on their own. But Maribel insists on taking them to dinner and to Target before she, Antonio, and Gabe go back to the city.

"I'm incredibly thankful for your parents but I'm glad they are gone. It's been a long day." Brittany tells Santana after they've given final hugs and promises to come visit after Maribel and Antonio get back from their vacation in July.

"Me too. Should we finish unpacking?"

"It really is only a few more things. Why don't you go shower, and I'll finish it. And then I'll shower. Then movie?"

"Sounds perfect. Movie night with my girlfriend in our apartment." She emphasized our. "That we live together in." Neither could keep the smile off of their faces as they leaned in to kiss. Before it got carried away Brittany separated from Santana and told her to go get in the shower.

While Brittany was in the shower Santana gathered blankets and threw them on the couch. Quinn was gone spending a few weeks with Rachel at her house so she didn't have to worry about making messes or annoying Quinn. Not that it was ever a huge issue. She picked a movie that she knew Brittany would like and settled onto the couch to wait. Brittany showed up a few minutes later and cuddled into Santana on the couch while Santana started the movie.

Santana is sure that the movie is great. But she's distracted by playful kisses from Brittany, she's not complaining. The kissing deepens after a while and Santana can tell that Brittany wants to play. She was about to suggest that they move this back to the bedroom except she doesn't have to. No Quinn, no problem. She flips Brittany onto her back and straddles her, kissing her deeply until the need to breathe caused them to separate. Then she slid off of the couch and onto her knees right in front of it. "San don't leave." Brittany pouts.

"Not leaving." Santana grabs Brittany's thighs and rotates her a little bit so that she's kneeling in between them. She smirks at Brittany who seems to have just caught on to where this was going. Santana reached up and slipped her fingers beneath the elastic waist band of Brittany's boxers and pulled them slowly down her legs, and then off. Santana started slow, placing teasing little kisses on the insides of Brittany's thighs until she was squirming.

"Stop teasing." Brittany whined. Santana shook her head no before blowing warm air on Brittany's visibly wet center. Brittany's breath caught and she pressed her hips forward hoping for any friction. Santana leaned forward again and pressed a light kiss on top of Brittany's clit, but was gone before she could get any relief from the contact. "San…"

Santana relented and started to lick just a little harder, still managing to avoid touching the places Brittany really wants her. After a few teasing licks, she flicks her tongue over her clit. Brittany gasps. Santana is hit with a desire that she has had before, and would really like to try.

"I'll stop teasing if we can try something new."

"Anything." Brittany husks, pupils blown. She's extremely turned on.

"I'm going to lay down, and I want you to kneel over top of me. Ok?" Brittany nods. She really would do just about anything right now to relieve the pressure. Santana situates herself on the ground and Brittany climbs off of the couch, kisses Santana once, and then places her knees carefully on either side of Santana's face.

Santana reaches up and grasps Brittany's hips and pulls her down until she's just perfectly positioned. True to her word, she eagerly starts licking Brittany. Long firm strokes with her tongue that leave Brittany having to concentrate on not bucking her hips into Santana's mouth too hard. She can't help the small backwards and forwards motions though, as her body instinctually seeks out release.

Brittany catches sight of the tent in Santana's boxers and without even thinking about it falls forward onto one of her hands, using the other to pull the shorts down. She leans forward and takes Santana into her mouth, suckling on the head before taking more in. She can't believe how turned on she is right now.

Santana hadn't been expecting that, not that she was complaining. But suddenly her dick is pressing into Brittany's mouth, and it causes her to lose focus on what she's doing for a second. But before Brittany can even notice she's stopped, she has started again. She can't stop herself from moaning into Brittany even more than she had been.

She wasn't going to last long with Brittany's mouth on her, and her mouth on Brittany. Two of her favorite things happening at once, and she's honestly kind of surprised that she makes it past thirty seconds. She does, but not by much. When Santana feels herself about to come her movements still against Brittany and she arches up as much as she can in some kind of warning before she explodes into Brittany's mouth. As soon as she can feel she's done, and Brittany knows it too because her mouth is pulling slowly off of Santana's dick, she dives back in licking Brittany's clit they way she knows will make Brittany come the quickest.

Brittany forces herself back up to kneeling over top of Santana, giving her better access. It feels amazing. Different than when Santana normally goes down on her. Santana can tell Brittany is getting close. Her hips are moving in small circles, and her breath is coming quicker. Santana reaches up and presses three fingers inside of Brittany slowly. The low answering moan told Santana that that had been exactly what she wanted. Santana pumped in and out at an even pace, focusing her tongue on Brittany's clit. It wasn't long before Santana felt Brittany's muscles clamp down on her fingers and Brittany was shaking above her while moaning her name.

As soon as Brittany came most of the way down all she wanted was to be in her arms. So she carefully, with shaking limbs, raised herself up causing Santana's fingers to slip out of her. She then turned herself and crawled down and laid on top of Santana who, always knowing this was what Brittany needed, pulled her into her arms whispering sweet words of love into her ear.

"That was awesome." Brittany mumbles into Santana's neck. Santana can't help the laugh that escaped her lips.

"I'm glad you approve. Even though I hadn't meant for you to do anything to me."

Brittany pushes herself up so she can look at Santana. "There is no way I could have stopped myself. I could tell it wanted me."

"It always wants you."

"Good." Brittany lays back down before continuing. "I used to hate blow jobs."

"If I didn't already know why, I'd be surprised by that." Brittany smiles into Santana's chest. They lay there for a few more minutes before getting up, removing the rest of their clothes, and going to sleep.

Brittany wakes up the following Wednesday extremely nervous. Normally she can manage to at least lay still enough to not wake Santana. Today she fails miserably. "S'wrong baby?" Santana half yawns.

"Today's Wednesday."

"Mhmm." Brittany could tell Santana was fading back to sleep.

"San" Brittany shakes her gently. "Grades are up today."

Santana cracks open an eye to look at Brittany's face. She looks so nervous. Santana doesn't think she's ever checked grades the day they came out. She usually remembers sometime halfway through summer that she should maybe check them. But she's also never, not for a single moment, ever been concerned with passing a class. Or keeping a scholarship. Or getting kicked out of school. Santana forces herself completely awake so they can look them up. "First of all, good morning love." She kisses Brittany softly. "Let me get my laptop. We'll check them together ok?" She rolls out of bed and walks over to grab her laptop. When she turns around she catches Brittany staring at her. She gets it. Getting up in the morning and watching Brittany get out of bed is definitely up there on her list of reasons why she likes to sleep naked. "Ok perv. You want to check first or do you want me to check first?"

"You first. And I'm not perving, I'm appreciating." She curls into Santana's side and watches as she logs onto her account and clicks grades. "You got all A's! Even your stupid professor gave you an A!" Brittany crawled onto Santana's lap to kiss her.

"B slow down or we're not going to get to your grades." Brittany pulls back blushing.

"I'm just proud. I love you."

"I love you too. Your turn." Brittany resituated herself so she was still on Santana's lap but could also type on the computer. She clicked the link to see her grades and forced herself to keep looking at the computer. Before she could even register what she was seeing Santana was wrapping her up and pushing the computer away. "Britt! You got straight A's too!" Brittany's eyes were wide as she let Santana hug her tight.

"That's never happened before." She whispered back.

"You're on the Deans List Britt! We have to call my parents." Brittany nodded, excitement now setting in. She got all A's. She's not going to lose her scholarship or get put on probation. She knew tutoring was working but this is real proof.

They call Santana's parents who put them on speaker phone and cheer when they hear both girls got all A's. They expected it of Santana, but they were no less proud. But they both knew how hard Brittany had to work for her grades, and they were so happy it had paid off for her. They decided they would take the girls on a celebration dinner when they came to visit in July. Brittany had never, not once in her life, been celebrated for her grades in school. She couldn't have stopped smiling even if she tried. Last semester she had barely done well enough to keep her scholarship. So celebrated the fact that she had managed at least that. But it was nothing like this.

The next two weeks moves way too quickly for either of their liking. Lazy days filled with sleeping late, swimming, going for runs together, making love whenever they want, and going to bed much later than they should. It was the best two weeks of either of their lives.

The weeks that came after wouldn't be so bad either, Brittany thought as she got dressed in loose clothes for dancing. Today they would both start teaching at the art summer camp that was run through the school. It had been torture getting Santana out of bed. They hadn't gone to sleep early enough the night before and Santana with not enough sleep is not the happiest Santana. But she was up, and they left and went their separate ways.

When Brittany met Santana after camp had ended for the day to walk back to the apartment she noticed that Santana still looked really tired. "Hard day?" She asked, kissing Santana on the cheek.

"Not really. Kids were all good. We mostly just did intro stuff anyway."

"You look tired. I thought for sure you would have woken up during the day."

"Nope. Still exhausted. Guess I'll just need extra cuddles tonight." Brittany laughed before crossing her arms and looking up in thought.

"I think maybe I can do that." She put her arm around Santana's back and walked the rest of the way home.

But early to bed hadn't fixed Santana's tired problem, and by the end of the second day of camp it was clear that she was getting a pretty bad cold. Brittany had tried to convince her that she should stay home the next day but Santana didn't want to do that. And after that it became routine where Santana would wake up feeling worse everyday, and Brittany would try to convince her to stay home and get better. But Santana hated staying home and doing nothing. Brittany was worried the stress of trying to do nothing would make it worse than just letting her go to work. It was only six hours a day, and she made sure that Santana wasn't doing anything but laying around drinking tea the rest of the time.

By time the end of camp came along Santana wasn't feeling any better. Some days she thought maybe she was, just a little, but then the next it would be even worse. She was glad she stuck with teaching camp though. The kids had grown a lot and Santana had learned that she kind of liked teaching. Brittany thought that might happen, and she was pleased because she thought Santana was an excellent teacher.

While Brittany loved every second of camp, she didn't think it ending could have come soon enough. Santana was definitely getting worse. A few days in bed were definitely needed in order to help her kick whatever this was. She didn't think Santana could physically consume any more vitamin C or liquids, Brittany had been pumping her full of both. More rest would fix it.

A few days later it became clear that wasn't the answer. Brittany woke up pressed against a very warm and sweaty Santana. She put her hand to her forehead and right away knew she had a fever. She gets up and does a load of laundry and picks up the house, waiting for Santana to get up. When she does she tells Brittany that she doesn't feel any worse but Brittany can tell that's not true. Her cough sounded a hundred times worse even from just yesterday, and she clearly had a fever. "Maybe we should call your dad?" Brittany asked as she was brushing through Santana's hair trying to sooth her in some way.

"No babe. We can't. They're on vacation and they will just worry, you know them. People get sick. It's no big deal." But it didn't feel like no big deal. Brittany didn't know a lot about medicine but she knew that fevers were supposed to break and this one felt like it was just lasting all day. But she didn't want to go against Santana's wishes so she just watched her carefully and took care of her in any way she could.

Brittany has taken to waking up in the middle of the night for a few nights now. Some part of her just needs to check on Santana and make sure she's doing ok. Which might be silly because Santana is always asleep. But Brittany can't help it. Usually she gets up and makes sure Santana has enough water in her bottle before kissing the sick girl's cheek and falling back asleep.

Tonight she knew instantly that something was wrong. It took her just a second to register that the arm that had been resting on Santana's stomach felt like it was burning. She quickly sat up and examined the still sleeping girl. She wasn't breathing as deeply as normal and when she put her hand on Santana's forehead she gasped at how hot it was. She went into panic mode. She needed to get Santana up so they could call her dad or the doctor or something. "San wake up." There was no reaction. "Santana wake up baby come on." Still nothing. "Santana wake up right now." She started to panic even more as she shook an unresponsive Santana. There had been absolutely no reaction.

Santana was not waking up.


	25. Chapter 25

Brittany is in full on panic mode.

She shakes Santana's shoulders hard this time. Santana mumbles something incoherently in response. At first it's nothing but then the more she tries to keep Santana awake and talking, she starts to hear things that make more sense like that Santana feels cold, and that she's tired. While this certainly isn't good news, it's enough to snap Brittany out of blind panic and into action. She gets out of bed and runs over to the desk and grabs Santana's wallet and keys. Then she gets dressed and throws on some flip flops before dressing Santana in basketball shorts and a tank top. She wipes the hair off of her sweaty forehead before kissing it. "I'll be right back baby."

She runs outside and starts Santana's car and leaves the passenger door open before running back inside and picking Santana up, bridal style blanket and all, and walking outside with her. Santana curls slightly into her body which only makes it harder to put her down because all she really wants to do is comfort her right now, but she knows she needs to get her to a doctor.

While driving to the hospital she can't stop herself from feeling like the worst girlfriend for not making Santana do something sooner. They should have gone to the doctors two weeks ago. She pushes the thoughts out of her mind. She can't change what happened and now she just needs to get Santana help. She tries to talk out loud in a soothing voice in case she does wake up so she doesn't panic. When they get there Brittany pulls into emergency parking. She's not sure if she's allowed, but whatever, this feels like an emergency. She jumps out of the car and collects Santana into her arms and pulls her back out of the car without hitting her head on anything. It is much more difficult than putting her into the car.

She walks right up to the nurses station and as soon as they notice that she's carrying an unconscious Santana, someone comes to help her right away. They take Santana from her and into a room. Brittany had been reluctant to let her go, but as long as they didn't try to separate them, it was ok. The nurse asked Brittany a lot of questions while she took Santana's vitals. The guilt came back about letting Santana be this sick for so long.

Her temperature is 106 degrees, which is dangerously high. The doctor immediately orders her to be hooked up to an IV, as other nurses start placing ice packs around her and on top of her. After a few minutes Santana started shaking but the nurse told her it was ok. It didn't look ok. That was when Brittany couldn't hold back the tears anymore. Seeing Santana look so small, shaking in that bed, and Brittany couldn't even hold her to make her feel better? It was torture.

Slowly Santana started to come back around. "I don't like this Britt" is the first full sentence she says. Brittany jumps into action getting a nurse to come fix whatever it was that Santana didn't like. The doctor was happy with how much they had lowered her temperature so they took the ice packs away. That helped Santana's discomfort a little, but she was still miserable.

The doctor comes back in after they get the results of her blood test and tells them that he would like to have an xray done to check for pneumonia, because the blood tests aren't showing anything specific. Santana agrees but as soon as they start to wheel her away and she realizes that Brittany can't come with her she starts to get upset. "Shh. I'll be right here when you're done, they'll bring you right back to me." She coos into Santana's messy hair. "I love you. See you in a few minutes." Santana nods trying to hold back more tears as they take her back to get x rays.

It really does only take a few minutes but when they see each other again it's like it had been weeks. Brittany can't explain it really but she needs to be with Santana. Like she needs to protect her, even though she knows there isn't anything she can protect her from here. But that doesn't make the feeling go away. After about half an hour of Santana laying on her side holding Brittany's hand to her chest and falling in and out of sleep the doctor comes back in. "Ok girls. It's a pretty obvious case of pneumonia. Thankfully you are young and otherwise healthy so I think with some medicine and rest you're going to be fine. I'm going to prescribe you some antibiotics as well as two different inhalers and a cough suppressant. Take everything exactly how it tells you to on the package, except for the suppressant. That you can just take as needed. Ok? I'll have a nurse come in and work on getting you discharged, she can also answer any other questions you ladies might have. Feel better Santana." And then he was gone. Before they even had time to ask questions.

Brittany was ready when the nurse came in with all of her questions. "How can I help her sleep easier?"

"If she's calm and not coughing she shouldn't have too hard of a time sleeping. Now that her fever broke the symptoms might keep her up a little more, but the medicine should help. If the coughing proves to be a problem, have her sleep sitting up a little." Brittany wishes she had paper so she could take notes. But this was all common sense and she just needed to focus right now. This was for Santana.

"Ok. How long is it going to take her to get better?"

"She should start feeling better pretty soon. The medicine works fast. But she probably won't be completely over it for another two weeks, maybe more. But if it's more we're going to wnat you to come back."

"Is there any other reasons we should come back? Like any signs or something?"

"If her temperature goes back up give us a call. Other than that, unless she's feeling a lot worse I think it's going to be ok."

"I need to get a thermometer." Brittany mumbled to herself.

"I've got one you can have. Ok?" The nurse could tell how anxious Brittany was. She thought it was kind of cute.

"Really? Thank you so much!"

"Is it contagious?" They both heard Santana mumble from the bed. Brittany had thought she was sleeping.

"No honey." The nurse answered. "Some kinds are, but if you two have been together since you started getting sick and you've been around others it's safe to say you're probably not contagious."

Santana nodded a few times before she sort of drifted back off to sleep.

"Don't fall asleep Santana, I need you to sign this and then we're going to get you out of here." Santana opened her eyes and struggled to pull herself up. Brittany thankfully helped pull her into a sitting position. She signed the papers and then slumped into Brittany who held her sitting on the bed. The nurse went to get a wheelchair, which Santana tried to protest, and they wheeled her out of the door to Brittany's car.

On the way home Santana was asleep within a few seconds. The hospital had given them enough medicine to last until morning when Brittany could go pick up her prescriptions. She parked the car as close to the apartment as possible before going over to Santana's side, prepared to carry her in again. But as soon as she slipped her arm under Santana's leg, she woke up. "I can walk B." She mumbled sleepily. Brittany tried to argue but Santana insisted and very slowly climbed out of the car, Brittany supporting most of her weight anyway. After a very slow trip inside, Brittany got her into bed and as soon as she joined Santana climbed into her arms.

Brittany held her tight as she fell asleep and tried to will her own brain to shut off and fall asleep. But she couldn't. Even with Santana's warm and breathing body pressed against hers, she could not stop her mind from running at all of the horrible ways tonight could have ended. After an hour and a half of laying there Brittany heard the birds starting to chirp which meant it was officially morning. There was no way she was going to fall asleep, and she thought at least if she got out of bed and did things then maybe she could stop thinking for a little bit.

Santana was sleeping heavily so maneuvering their tangled limbs so she could pull them apart wasn't terribly difficult. She kissed Santana's forehead, lingering to gauge the temperature there, before parting and going into the kitchen. She knew one thing she definitely had to do, but did not want to. So instead she cleaned the kitchen, living room, and bathroom, and did a load of laundry that included all of Santana's favorite pajamas (which happened to consist primarily of Brittany's clothes). She checked on Santana every few minutes to make sure she was still ok. After she finished all of her options to further procrastination that didn't involve leaving the house to get medicine she went into their bedroom and got her phone.

She sat down on the couch and took a deep breath before selecting a number and pushing send. "Brittany!"

"Maribel, hey." She tried to sound as enthusiastic as possible.

"How are my girls?"

"We're uh… you know. How's vacation?" She could tell by the half second of dead silence that her attempts at making this conversation casual were not going to happen.

"Brittany what's wrong?" Maribel's voice was instantly more serious. "Are you ok? Is Santana ok? Brittany?"

"We're ok." Brittany answers quickly before Maribel could full on panic. "Santana is just, she's sick."

"Sick with what?" The panic was definitely not out of her voice. "Like the cold she's had?"

"Yeah. But it got worse. Uh last night she had a really high fever so I took her to the emergency room and they said she has pneumonia."

"Pneumonia?!"

"She's….yeah. But they gave her medicine, and sent her home. I'm going to go pick up her prescriptions soon."

"We'll get the next flight home. Immediately." Brittany could now hear Antonio in the background getting steadily more upset.

"No. No it's fine. If you left your vacation she'd be really upset. It's ok, other than getting things for her, I can be here 24/7. I already texted someone to cover my dance classes this weekend."

"Antonio wants to speak to you." Maribel answered back a little shaky. Brittany nodded her head as if they could see her.

"Brittany. Tell me everything the doctor said." Brittany recounted every single detail to him from the time they stepped into the hospital. He seemed satisfied with the diagnosis and what they had given Santana to make her feel better.

"I'm really sorry to have to call and ruin your vacation." Brittany said quietly. She knew that would potentially be the outcome. They were both very protective parents.

"No. I'm glad you called. We're not going to leave just yet. I trust you and the doctor. But if she gets worse, you need to call me. As soon as she is up and awake I want her to give us a call ok? We'll keep checking on the both of you." Brittany nodded again.

"Absolutely."

"Ok. Go take care of her Brittany. Thank you for calling, I will speak to you soon." They hung up the phone and Brittany breathed a sigh of relief. It wasn't easy, but it was over. She looked at the time on her phone, Santana needed her next round of medicine in less than an hour. She called the prescription into the pharmacy and then went and got dressed. She walked over to the bed and kneeled down kissing Santana's head before shaking her lightly. "Mmmm". Santana protested.

"You don't have to get up S. I just want you to know I'm going to get your medicine. I'll be back soon. Ok?"

"Don't go." Santana whined pathetically.

"I have to baby. You need the medicine. Go back to sleep. I'll be back before you even wake up ok?" Santana shook her head in a vague way that could have meant either 'Ok' or 'No' but Brittany couldn't tell. And she had to get the medicine either way. So she leaned down and pressed her lips to Santana's cheek and left.

When she got to the grocery store that had the pharmacy in it, the medicine still had a few more minutes before she could pick it up so she quickly gathered anything and everything Santana might want over the next few days. She had no intentions of leaving her side again, not until she was healthy. Once the medicine was ready she picked it up, quickly checked out, and drove home as fast as she legally (or maybe a little illegally) could.

When she got inside she didn't even put the groceries away before she ran into the bedroom to check on Santana. She was still asleep in the same position she had been when Brittany left. Except now she was looking a little flushed. She put her hand on Santana's cheek and it was definitely warm. Without raising any panic, she grabbed the thermometer they had given her at the hospital. "San, sweetie wake up. I need to take your temperature." After a few more gentle shakes Santana stirred and looked up at Brittany with watery eyes.

"Why?" She pouted.

"You feel a little warm and the doctor told me to monitor your temperature. Just open your mouth a little. That's all you have to do." Brittany slid the thermometer under Santana's tongue and pressed her chin gently to get her to close her mouth. While she was waiting she stroked her fingers over Santana's exhausted features, hoping to sooth her in some way. When the thermometer beeped she read that Santana was running a fever again. "Ok baby. I'm going to go wash this off. Do you want anything? You should try to drink some of the water I have here." Santana lifted her arm to reach to grab the bottle of water but she was weak and couldn't quite reach. "Let me get it for you." Brittany whispered.

She took the water bottle and held the straw part up to Santana's dry lips. She took a few sips before the exertion of keeping her head up got to be too much. "Ok I'm going to go wash this and put away the groceries." Brittany partially lied.

"Do I have to go back to the doctors?" Santana mumbled.

"I'm just going to call and see what they say ok?" Santana nodded as Brittany took the thermometer and her phone into the kitchen. The first thing she did was dial the number she had programmed into her phone last night.

"Hello I need to speak to Dr. Jameson please."

"He actually left a few hours ago. Can I direct you to another doctor?" Brittany rolled her eyes.

"I guess so?" The woman put down the phone with promises to be back as quickly as possible. In the meantime Brittany put things away and and disinfected the thermometer.

"Hello this is Dr. Lutzer can I help you?"

"Hi, my name is Brittany. I brought my girlfriend to the emergency room last night…" She told him the entire story before ending with her current temperature.

"Have you given her another dose of medicine?"

"She's not due for another half an hour."

"Ok. Go ahead and give it to her now. If the fever doesn't fade pretty quick, make her take a lukewarm bath. Make sure the water is pretty low though, and if in two hours the fever persists, bring her back in. Ok? Some people burn through medicine quicker than others. So that might solve the problem very quickly." Brittany thanked him and hung up the phone before gathering everything she needed and heading back into Santana's room.

In just the few short minutes it took her to call the doctor, Santana was already back asleep. Brittany hated that she had to keep waking her, but the alternative was scary. Once she gently woke Santana again she helped her sit up just a little bit. "What did he say?" Santana's voice was so weak, Brittany hated it.

"Medicine now, and then a cool bath if that doesn't work, and if nothing happens in two hours he said to bring you in. But he thought the medicine was going to fix it."

"Hope so. I don't want to go back."

"Me neither baby. Ok swallow these." She held the pills up to Santana's lips and followed quickly with the water. She shook the inhaler just as the instructions said before holdng it up to Santana's mouth. "Ok love. As deep of a breath as you can manage ok? On three." Santana took both of her inhalers before settling back down on the bed.

"I wish I could take a bath though. Feel so gross."

"You can if you want. I washed all your favorite boxers and pj pants." Brittany continued to run her fingers through Santana's limp hair.

"Can't B. I can barely stand. I couldn't even reach the water bottle." Santana started to tear up. It was no secret to Brittany that Santana got like this when sick or scared. She couldn't blame her.

"I'll carry you."

"You will?"

"Anywhere you want to go." She saw Santana crack a tiny smile. "Let me go run the water first though." She ran into the bathroom and remembering the doctors suggestion she kept the water at a low height. She went back into the bedroom and helped Santana sit up, pulling her t-shirt off over her head, and her boxers down off of her tiny legs. It broke Brittany's heart how difficult the task of someone else undressing her made Santana look even more tired and pale. She reached under Santana's legs and picked her up and pulled her into her chest. When she got to the bathroom she lowered Santana into the tub, her muscles straining.

"S'cold."

"I know San. But the doctor said it's good for you." Brittany waited for a moment but it seemed Santana was asleep again. She shook her head and grabbed the wash cloth, lathering it up with Santana's favorite body wash. She started up at her neck, cleaning every inch as gently as she could. She cleaned her breasts and her sides before moving up and getting both of her arms. She went to lift one of her arms to wash her armpits when Santana woke back up slightly.

"Thanks Britt." If Brittany didn't know better she would swear Santana was sleep talking. She finished cleaning and rinsing her armpits before moving down to her feet and up both legs. The only reachable spot she had left to clean was Santana's penis and the surrounding area. Without even thinking about it she gently lifted it and washed it with the utmost care. Santana jerked awake. "You don't have t'do that." She mumbled, weakly raising her arm.

"Why? You're sick and you need taken care of. This is part of that." Then after a pause she added as an afterthought. "Is it weird for you?" Santana shook her head back and forth.

"Not really. Feels good to be taken care of. Feels good to be clean. S'long as it's not weird for you."

"It's not at all. This isn't a sexual situation. It's not weird for you to need help cleaning yourself when you're as sick as you are?" Santana nodded. Brittany, as usual, was right.

Brittany continued her reverent washing of her girlfriend's body before washing and rinsing her hair. She carried Santana back into the bedroom and dried her off and brushed her hair. "Feel any better?"

"A little." Her voice definitely sounded a little stronger.

"Can I make you some soup and maybe we can sit on the couch for a little bit? I want to wash your bedding and you need to eat and get some more fluids down. Santana agreed and Brittany helped move her to the couch.

That's how Santana spent the majority of the next few days. Shuffling back and forth between the bed and the couch. Maribel made good on her promise to call and check on them several times a day. Brittany knew Santana was starting to feel better when she asked if Brittany would go lay out by the pool with her. She just needed sunshine. And Brittany couldn't disagree. Santana had not seen sunlight in several days, which couldn't be helping anything. They didn't stay out long but they did go out again the next day.

A week and a half later Brittany and Santana were preparing to make the trip up to Santana's parents house. They were back from vacation and had insisted on coming down to see them but Santana told them no, that she wanted to come home for a few days. Really, she just needed a change of pace, but one that would still allow her to spend a lot of time sleeping. She was definitely feeling better, but not awesome. Not yet. So Brittany packed everything while Santana took a nap and when she woke up they showered and got into the car. Santana had almost protested when Brittany got into the drivers seat but decided she didn't really have the energy to drive anyway.

Brittany panicked a little bit when they got closer to the city, but she held her own and did remarkably well, in Santana's opinion, for her first drive into the city. As soon as they drove into Santana's neighborhood she saw the signs for the neighborhood festival hanging over the streets. They would be here for that. She always thought it was super lame when she was younger, but now that she was older she guesses it's kind of cool. Plus Brittany will love it, they have fireworks and games and everything.

Maribel is outside waiting when they pull up, which is extremely unusual. But Santana gets it, she's been worried. She just hopes it doesn't cause her mom to be too hovering because that just gets annoying. Brittany pulls into the parking lot and before she even gets the car turned off Maribel is already opening up Santana's door and pulling her out of the car. "Mami my seat belt! Calm down." But Maribel doesn't (not that anybody actually thought she would). She hugs and kisses Santana a hundred times before she does the same to Brittany who is now thankfully at Santana's side, and carrying their bag.

Maribel told them they should go inside and get out of the heat. She went to help Santana inside but as soon as she turned to do so, Brittany already had her arm around her and was supporting her up the walkway and into the house. It took a little while for her to get used to someone else caring for one of her babies in her presence, but it was heartwarming to watch. It also reaffirmed the decision that Antonio had made about not coming home from vacation because he was positive Brittany would take good care of her. And it wasn't that Maribel didn't agree, it's just that she still felt slightly guilty. But watching Brittany care so tenderly for Santana erased that guilt

Break was slow and sweet. Family dinners and time spent in the back yard. All of Santana's brothers came to visit at least once. She was feeling significantly better by time the neighborhood festival came up. "Hey Britt…there's this thing tonight. I don't know if you saw signs around. The neighborhood festival? It's this stupid thing, kind of like a fair. There's rides and food. Fireworks…"

"Can we go?!" Brittany finished for her excitedly. "Wait. If you're feeling up to it. I don't want you to do anything you're not ready for."

"I think I'm feeling up to it. My mami and papi are probably going to. And you'll get to meet more of my family. My aunt and uncle and their kids will be there." Brittany smiled and hugged Santana.

"I'm excited."

Later that evening they got ready. Santana was, as usual, struck by Brittany's effortless beauty. It still happened sometimes, that she couldn't believe Brittany was hers. Forever. It was something she never doubted, just that it snuck up on her and reminded her how lucky she was. They headed over to the street that was blocked off for the festival during the early evening. They walked slowly, but nobody minded. Santana was feeling much better, but weeks of lying around and not eating much definitely took a toll on her body.

When they got there Brittany was instantly overtaken by the excitement. She had been to an amusement park twice while in school but this wasn't like that. It was smaller, closer together, and somehow brighter. Santana couldn't help but smile at the look on Brittany's face. She knew she would love it. She loves being part of the reason for that look.

They spent the first hour walking around saying hello to people they knew and just seeing what all was at the fair. Brittany had declared that she wanted to eat every single thing they passed (and Santana believed she probably could). She only made Santana promise to ride one ride with her, the ferris wheel. Santana was grateful that Brittany didn't ask her to ride more, she wasn't feeling up to it. But Brittany probably knew that which is why she only asked for the one.

After a little while of walking around they met up with Santana's aunt and uncle and their three kids. After initial hugs and kisses Brittany pulls Brittany forward. "Aunt Nina, Uncle John this is Brittany my girlfriend." Brittany shyly waved but Nina jumped forward pulling Brittany into her arms.

"I've heard so much about you! Oh my God Maribel she is as pretty as you said!" Brittany blushed and whispered thank you.

"Britt these are my snotty little cousins JJ, Lena, and Tony." Santana gestured to the three young children standing excitedly in the center of the adults.

"We're not snotty Tana!" The little girl yelled back making Brittany laugh. Brittany knelt down.

"I bet you're not snotty. I'm Brittany." She stuck out her hand to the little girl who shook it enthusiastically. "How old are you guys?"

"Me and Lana are 8 cause we're twins. Tony's a baby. He's six."

"I'm NOT a baby!"

"You don't look like a baby." Brittany cut in. Tony towed the ground with his shoe and blushed.

"Somebody has a little crush on your woman Tana." Nina jokingly whispered.

"Can we ride rides now?" Lena asked. "I want to sit with Brittany!"

"I don't know if Brittany wants to ride rides sweetie." John answered.

"Of course I do." Brittany laughed. Santana loved every single meeting Brittany had with her family and how easily she always fit in. She was meant to be here. They walked around the fair and rode every ride the kids wanted to. They fought over who got to sit with Brittany and honestly, Santana couldn't blame them. They took a break to eat way too much food. Brittany was having an amazing time playing with the kids and walking around with Santana and her family. She hoped they could come back for this every year.

After a few more rides they settled on the grass to watch the fireworks. Brittany sat next to Santana for a total of three minutes until the kids were pulling her up to play again. Santana sat next to her mom, watching Brittany play, thinking about the future because it was hard not to in moments like these. Beautiful Brittany, happy children, perfect life. She wasn't paying attention to anything else so when her mom leaned over and whispered "Like looking into the future mija?" in her ear, it scared her for a second.

She felt that initial panic she always felt when her mom brought up the future or children, but it went away quickly. She'd thought about it too much recently to be surprised by someone else thinking about it too. "Yeah." She smiled. She didn't know if now was a good time, or if there ever was a good time to bring up something she'd thought about recently. "I've been thinking about" she took a breath. "engagement rings. Not now. But maybe someday."

Maribel nodded. She wasn't surprised. Not even a little bit. Really she was trying to hold back the urge not to scream and dance and start talking about locations and dresses. She took a second to calm herself. "Well. Maybe you should move some money from your savings account. Just in case. You want to be prepared."

Santana's heart started to pound harder. She thought for sure her mami would say something about waiting till they graduated, and honestly, she didn't think she could wait that long. But for her to say this, basically giving her permission, telling her to even. "Yeah, prepared." Was all she could come up with to respond.

As soon as the fireworks started Brittany came running back to Santana. Santana took her hand and pulled her down in between her legs instead of next to her where Brittany had looked like she was going to sit. She really needed to hold her right now. As soon as Brittany was laying back against her chest looking up at the fireworks Santana whispered "I love you" into her ear and pressed a kiss there.

"Love you too. So much." They watched the rest of the fireworks. But mostly Santana watched Brittany.

After the fireworks the kids were getting tired, but they hadn't rode the ferris wheel yet so Nina and John promised them one more ride before they left. The kids fought over who would sit next to her on this one but she ended the argument pretty quickly. "Sorry guys, Santana promised me a ride on this one." They whined a little bit but got over it pretty quickly as soon as they got in line and started fighting over who got to sit in the middle.

They got onto the ride and Santana put her arm around Brittany's shoulders. "Did you have fun today Britt?"

"The most. I want to come back again."

"We can come every year if you want."

"Really?"

"Well yeah. My parents will probably never leave this area so we'll always be allowed to come with them." Brittany nodded, smiling. Santana swallowed thickly, a little nervous for her next statement. "We could even bring our kids here, you know." Brittany looked at her with her eyes shining.

"I think that would be amazing." Brittany leaned down to kiss her, and that's how they spent the rest of the ride.

The next morning they packed their stuff to get ready to head back to New Jersey. Quinn was coming back that evening and Santana had promised to pick her up from the train station. Brittany also had to get back to teaching her weekend dance classes. Santana promised her parents they would come back for a few days before school started back up, and after a million hugs and a huge bag full of leftovers, they left. As Santana was driving down the street she thought of something. "Do you mind if we stop at my bank really quick? I just need to run in and check on something." Brittany shook her head no.

They pulled into the bank parking lot and Santana left Brittany in the car still looking for a song on her iPod.

"Hello can I help you?"

"Yeah. I just need to uh, transfer some money from my savings account."

"Ok, I just need your ID and your account number." Santana gave her both and waited for a moment, tapping on the counter. "Ok Miss Lopez. How much money would you like me to transfer?"

"I… like eight thousand. I think."

"Eight thousand? Planning a big purchase?" The teller asked making idle conversation while she tapped away at the computer.

"The biggest." Santana responded seriously. The teller smiled at her and handed her a statement slip before Santana thanked her and ran back out to the car where Brittany was having a solo dance party in the front seat. She slipped into the drivers side and leaned over kissing Brittany fully on the lips, taking her by surprise. But the surprise faded and her hands came up to cup Santana's face and she deepened the kiss. When they parted they were both gasping for air.

"What was that for?"

"I just love you."

"I love you too." Brittany responded sweetly. Santana took her hand and started the drive back home, with Brittany and the biggest purchase she will have ever made on her mind.

* * *

**AN: **Thank you to my beta, as always. She's wonderful. Also everyone that reviewed last chapter, you are all my favorite.

Three more chapters, I'm pretty sure. Then some one shots. Then maybe a sequel? Or... I don't know.

No guys I'm just kidding there is definitely a sequel. I just can't promise you when it will be out. But it is a real thing. It is planned.

Reviews? Let me know what you thought? Feelings on the sequel? It's already planned out but that doesn't mean I can't involve some things that you guys suggest. Follow me on tumblr (klikeszombies . tumblr . com).


	26. Chapter 26

Santana is not whipped. She's not. It's just that she has a really hard time not giving Brittany what she wants. But it's not because she's whipped. It is because she loves her.

And maybe she's whipped.

Maybe.

They've started this thing this summer where they go to the movies once a week no matter what. They're not delusional. They know it won't be possible to go no matter what once school starts back up but even then they've vowed to try.

Sometimes the movie is bad. Really bad. But the movie isn't the point. The point is to spend time together doing something outside of the house. The idea started after they discovered that unless pressed to do so, they spent two straight weeks inside with just each other and occasionally Quinn. They don't want to become one of those couples that burns out on spending time together. So date nights.

The movie theater just so happens to be at the mall. Which, on this particular night, also happens to be housing an ASPCA booth with lots of animals. They're doing an adoption drive. Which they almost managed to miss, but they walked past just as the woman in charge was cleaning up.

Brittany can absolutely not resist stopping to see animals. It's not a particular secret that she wants one. They've talked about it, and they both agreed that it was a discussion that they should revisit when they are both out of school. It makes sense and so while Brittany definitely still wants a pet, she is ok with not having one for right now. But that doesn't mean she can't stop to look, especially at the cats. Santana doesn't mind either. She likes animals. Cats don't bother her although she really wants a dog.

So they stop at this ASPCA booth and there's really not that many animals. A lab wondering around that isn't for adoption they are told after he greets them. He's the shelter boss apparently. A few of the crates have cats and dogs but most of them have homes. They just, for one reason or another, couldn't go home that night and were being picked up the next day.

Then they saw the crate with the little cream colored fluff ball pressed way in the back. "It's so tiny! I bet this one was one of the first to go." Brittany giggled as she pressed her fingers into his soft fur. He jumped a little but eventually settled into her gentle touch.

"Actually he wasn't adopted. We had a bunch of kittens here and he is the only one left." Santana watched Brittany's face fall a little. But her optimism wouldn't let her believe this little kitten would spend much time lonely.

"He's so cute though. I bet he'll get adopted really soon."

"I hope so. He's actually been in the shelter already for a few weeks, he's just pretty small for his age. Kittens usually don't ever stay a week."

"Then why doesn't anyone want him?" Santana could see Brittany's eyes getting shiny. She was showing all the signs that she was starting to get anxious. The woman reached into the crate and pulled the little kitten out and put him on the table. He wobbled a little before sitting down.

"He's only got three legs. He lost one of them due to an injury from a dog attack, that best we can tell, killed his mother and the rest of his litter. He also suffered an eye injury and now he can only see out of the one. His eyelid is permanently closed on the other. So he's not your typical cute little kitten. He's not as playful as the others because his balance is still kind of tricky and it takes him a little while to figure out his surroundings." Until the woman said something she hadn't noticed his eyelid but now that she looks it's pretty obvious. She had noticed his missing leg as soon as she put him on the table though.

She felt bad for the little guy. His life hadn't been so easy and it kind of sucked that he had to sleep in a crate. She looked over at Brittany expecting her to pick the kitten up but she was met with a very anxious and upset looking Brittany. "So people don't want him because he takes a little more work? He lost his whole family and now he doesn't even have a home." She looks over to Santana, lip quivering, before she excuses herself and runs to the bathroom.

Santana apologizes to the woman quickly before turning around and following Brittany. As soon as she gets into the bathroom she finds Brittany crying. She instantly takes her into her arms and tries to sooth her. Nothing works immediately and Santana just lets her cry into her shoulder. "I just don't understand." Brittany hiccups into Santana's neck. "It breaks my heart that nobody is there to love him. He's probably not as playful because he watched his mom die." And Santana's not exactly sure it works like that with cats, but it hurts her all the same because Brittany obviously believes it does. A few seconds later after her breathing has evened out a little, Brittany asks if they can just go. So they do.

Later that night they're laying in bed naked and Brittany is a little more fidgety than normal. Usually she's pretty calm and sleepy after sex, but not tonight. "What's wrong Britt?"

Brittany tells her nothing at first, trying to play it off but eventually admits "I can't stop thinking about how sad that little kitten must be. And I didn't even hug him, so he must not feel very worthy right now." She watches Brittany's face fall again and she wraps her up and holds her close. And then she gets a thought, which of course turns into a plan.

The next afternoon after doing a bit of research and having a sneaky conversation with Quinn, she tells Brittany that she has to go to the music building to check on some stuff for her professor. She tells her that she will be back in a little bit and Brittany looks like she's about to ask if she wants her to come with but then Quinn (who sometimes has amazing timing) comes out of her bedroom and asks if they want to go to the pool with her. Brittany looks torn between wanting to go to the pool and wanting to be a good girlfriend and ask if Santana wants help. Santana smiles and tells her to just go to the pool and that she'll be back soon. Brittany smiles and kisses her goodbye.

First thing she does after she leaves is stop in one of the parking lots on campus and pulls up her list of all ASPCA's in the area. Thankfully there are not a ton, and the one that had a booth at the mall they were at last night was the second one she called. The kitten was still there. She drives to the address she found online and the woman from the booth last night is the first employee she encounters. The woman does not look surprised at all to see her there. Santana tells her she would like to take the kitten home. They sit down and go through all of the necessary paperwork, and it takes a surprisingly short amount of time.

Before she knows it the woman is handing her a folder with adoption papers and microchip numbers and standing up to go into the back. Santana has no idea why she's nervous but she is a little. This is the first thing that's really theirs. She even wrote both her and Brittany's names on the adoption forms. Not to mention that this is kind of a big thing to surprise Brittany with (although she's not really worried about Brittany being mad). But when the woman brings out the little fluffy kitten, Santana is even more positive about her decision. He needs a home, and they have a very loving one to provide.

She goes straight home. She knows there are things she needs to buy. The little kitten curled up in her lap doesn't have food or bowls or a litter box. Essentials. But she can't think about picking those things out for their kitten without Brittany, so she goes home to surprise her first.

As soon as she gets home it became clear to her that she hadn't exactly thought this through all the way. She could see Quinn and Brittany were still out by the pool but she didn't really want to bring the kitten there. So she decided to take him upstairs and put him in her room and then just get Brittany to come upstairs. She was nervous about leaving him on the bed, worried that he would jump off and hurt himself. But the woman at the shelter had said he was perfectly capable of jumping on and off of furniture. It might not be graceful, but he was fine to go ahead and do it.

So Santana left him in the center of her bed and ran to the pool as fast as she could. She could tell Brittany was alarmed when she came crashing through the gate into the pool area. "What's wrong?" She nearly jumped up.

"Nothing." She took a breath. "Nothing. I just wanted to run. Also can you come help me with something really quick?" She saw over her shoulder that Quinn rolled her eyes and mouthed 'smooth'. Whatever. She was excited. She reaches out her hand for Brittany to take and pulls her back into the apartment. Once they get into the hallway of her bedroom she steps back. "Ok. Open the door." Brittany looks at her like she might have gone a little crazy, but she pushes open the door in good faith anyway. Santana holds her breath and waits for the reaction.

Which takes long enough that Santana has to take a breath or she might pass out. "San?" Brittany turns to her. Santana is busy though, looking at the center of the bed where she left the kitten. She's lost it already, and she starts panicking until she sees him. A little cream colored slightly surly looking kitten curled up between their pillows, almost camouflaged.

"Look right there Britt." Santana points to where the kitten is laying. Brittany's eyes move to the spot.

"What am I looking…" Brittany pauses as she sees the kitten and her mouth falls open. She looks back at Santana. "What?" Then she turns her head towards the kitten again. When she turns back to Santana one more time her eyes are starting to get watery.

"You were so sad last night you couldn't hug him and now he's right there."

"He?" Brittany squeaks out. Santana nods and presses into the center of Brittany's back, gently urging her forward. The little push is all Brittany needs before she hurries over to the bed and scoops up the kitten. She cradles him to her chest for a few seconds, kissing his little head. Santana can see her shoulders shaking just a little bit. Before she can ask Brittany why she's crying, she puts the kitten back down on the bed and turns around, and throws herself into Santana's arms.

Santana tightens her arms around her and lets Brittany cry for a few seconds. "Baby" she coos, "don't cry." Brittany tightens her hold on Santana.

"I can't help it. He didn't have anybody and you saved him. And I didn't have anybody and you saved me." She tries to sniff back the sob that is threatening to break her words. "I think I'm the luckiest person ever." Santana kisses her cheek but before she can respond they both hear a tiny meow coming from the bed. Brittany whips around and they see the little kitten standing shakily on his three legs looking at them. "That was the cutest thing I've ever heard." Brittany separates from Santana momentarily in order to pick up the kitten and cuddle him in between them. "What's his name?"

"He doesn't have one yet. The lady at the adoption place just called him Little Cat."

"That's not special enough." Brittany pouted.

"I thought we could name him together." Brittany's answering smile made her happy. "What about Tripod?"

"What?"

"You know like a camera stand. They only have three legs." Brittany laughed but shook her head no. She held the kitten out in front of her and studied his face.

"He's very noble looking." Santana wasn't exactly sure how she came to that conclusion but Brittany wasn't ever really wrong so she was sure she had just missed it or something. "He's kind of chubby." Now that Santana could definitely see. "I think his name is Lord Tubbington."

"Wait. How did you come up with that?"

"You can just tell. He looks like a Lord Tubbington." Brittany spun him around and held him up in front of Santana's face. His nose was smushed in like he had run into a brick wall and he had a look of constant grumpiness to him. But if Brittany said that's what a Lord Tubbington looked like, she wasn't going to argue.

"Can I call him LT for short?"

"I like LT."

"Lord Tubbington Lopez-Pierce." Santana announced.

"Maybe just Lopez." Brittany responded suddenly bashful.

"Why just Lopez?"

"Well, the Pierce part of my name will go away someday, so it makes sense right?" Brittany said mostly to Lord Tubbington even though Santana knew that had been directed at her. Brittany Lopez. Santana wanted it so badly.

"Genius." She whispered before hugging Brittany and inadvertently LT to her chest. After a second, reality came back to her. "We've got to go to the pet store and get stuff for him. I figured you'd want to help pick it. We can bring Tubbs with us."

"San I don't know if he likes being called Tubbs." Santana thought it was probably really hard to tell what he liked and didn't like because he mostly just looked annoyed. But she frowned anyway and patted his head in apology before grabbing her keys and ushering her girlfriend and their kitten out of the front door.

When they get back from the pet store they have, what Santana believes, to be way more stuff than any one kitten needs. But she couldn't stop Brittany (and maybe added a few things herself) so here she was trying to set up his water dispenser. By the time they got back Quinn was home so now she and Brittany were trying to get LT to play with them, which was half working. It was some playing, with a lot of stumbling. His pouncing skills needed some work.

Brittany sent pictures to everyone. Several pictures, actually. Santana's mother responded "My first grandson!" which made Santana happy and embarrassed at the same time. While he was cautious at first, he got steadily more brave about climbing on things and exploring on his own. Brittany swore he was perfect. Santana would not admit out loud that she agreed.

By the end of the day they learned they had to be careful because he had the terrible habit of wanting to stand exactly where you were about to step. Realized he kind of preferred to be carried anyway, and ate like every hour. Santana was sitting on the couch watching the end of a movie when Brittany kissed the kitten on the head and put him back down before walking over and standing in front of Santana. "I'm going to shower. And then you should shower and then we should go to bed."

Santana looked over at her with a raised eyebrow. That was an oddly specific plan. "Are you tired?" She asked.

"Not really. I just want to go to bed." That gave Santana a small idea of what was going on but decided to let things play out.

"Ok. You go shower. I'll hang out with LT for a bit." Brittany nodded and got up and went to the bathroom. Not long after, she emerged wearing a robe and telling Santana the bathroom was free. Santana took Tubbs to their bedroom and handed him off to Brittany before taking her own shower. It occurred to her that she hadn't taken many solo showers at all since Brittany had moved in.

When she was done she wrapped the towel around herself and went back into her room where Brittany was sitting at her computer still in the robe with LT purring away on her lap. Santana pulls boxers and a sports bra on before she asks Brittany what she's doing. "Surprise." Brittany mumbles back before looking over at her. Then she gets up, kisses LT on the head and tells him to have fun exploring, and closes the door. Without words she walks back over to the computer and pulls the chair into the center of the room.

"Sit please." She says. Santana, more than intrigued, does as she's told. "I wanted to do something for you, because you're so amazing. But it's kind of new for me too." Brittany stood there for a second longer before she bounced over to the computer and hit play. There was a few seconds where Santana was trying to figure out what song it was before the song was the least irrelevant thing in the world.

Right in front of her, Brittany had dropped her robe and was wearing a see through tank top and lacey panties. Santana's mouth dropped open as she moved to the edge of her seat. "Britt" She whispered. Brittany took a few steps closer and was within her reach. She reached out her arms to pull Brittany to her.

"No touching until I say so." Santana swallowed and nodded and sat back in the chair. Brittany's hips started swaying to the music and within a few seconds all nervousness that she may have had in the beginning was gone as she continued dancing. She turned around and dropped down right in front of Santana, slowly coming back up before sitting down on her lap and grinding into her now hard cock.

"B-baby" Santana whined out as Brittany did it again.

Brittany stood up and turned around facing her again, leaning in until their lips almost touched, it was torture. But just when Santana was sure Brittany was going to kiss her she whispered "Put your arms up." Santana did as she was told, and found herself quickly without her shirt sitting on a chair in extremely tented boxers, digging her nails into the chair to try and control her desire to just touch Brittany.

Brittany, for her part, knew Santana was suffering but was sure it was in the best way possible. She was also practically dripping she was so wet. So it wasn't like Santana was suffering alone. Brittany turned and faced away from Santana and seductively unhooked her bra and let it slide down her arms before turning back around. Santana whimpered at the sight. Brittany smiled at her before reaching forward and hooking her fingers into Santana's boxers and pulled them off before straddling her again. "Baby I need you so bad." Santana spoke through gritted teeth.

She was so turned on it was actually painful. She needed to be inside of Brittany. Or for Brittany to touch her. Anything. She couldn't stop her hips from rutting upwards as she spoke. Brittany could hear the need in her voice so she stood back up, and slipped her panties down before re-straddling Santana. "Is this what you want?" Brittany husked. Santana didn't even have time to answer before Brittany gripped her in her hand and dragged the head of Santana's cock through her dripping folds, nudging her clit. She bit her lip to stop the moan, and positioned Santana at her entrance before sinking down.

Santana thrusted up just a little as her eyes rolled back and she exploded into Brittany. It happened so fast, she had no way of stopping it. Brittany felt it too and she sunk down as far as she could, moaning as hot come filled her. As soon as Santana was done, her eyes widened and she looked up into Brittany's. "I-I" She started but Brittany silenced her with a kiss. She took Santana's hands in hers and pulled them up to her waist. She pulled back from the kiss, only slightly. "You can touch now." She whispered before kissing Santana again deeply.

A kiss like that can totally make you forget that you just came after being inside of your girlfriend for exactly two seconds. And when Santana strokes her thumb over Brittany's nipples, and she makes those desperate little noises into Santana's mouth, she starts to get hard again. She trails her fingers down Brittany's body to where theirs are currently joined and strokes Brittany's clit. Brittany starts moving backward and forward, grinding herself on Santana's semi-hard dick and into her fingers as she continues to stroke Brittany's clit. Their lips separate and Santana quickly kisses her way to Brittany's nipples and takes one into her mouth, sucking gently.

In no time at all Brittany's breathing picked up and Santana felt her muscles clamp down around her. Brittany's orgasm coupled with…well just Brittany and now Santana was completely hard again. After a few seconds of letting Brittany recover she stood up, causing Brittany to wrap her legs around her waist, and walked over to the bed. With her lips sealed to Brittany's she started thrusting rapidly in and out, angling so that she knew she was hitting Brittany's g-spot. She was muttering unintelligible things and trying to pull Santana closer when Santana felt Brittany tighten around her again, causing Santana to come even harder for the second time, before collapsing on top of Brittany.

Time passed that was measured in nothing but heavy breaths and sloppy kisses before Brittany finally rasped out "sleep." And Santana nodded against her. The shuffled up to the bed, not even bothering with blankets, just keeping each other warm. Santana was almost asleep when she heard Brittany giggle. "What?" She mumbled.

"Your face when you came the first time was so cute."

"I don't want to talk about that baby." Santana buried her face in Brittany's back and tightened her arm around her waist. She heard Brittany giggle a few more times before she felt her breathing even out. She smiled at the cute little noises Brittany was making and decided that as long as it never ever happened again, she could hardly blame herself for what happened. In fact, it was Brittany's fault. And with a resolute nod, she allowed herself to drift off to sleep.

The next morning they are still kind of in some sort of post orgasmic bliss. They can't keep their hands off of each other even as they get dressed because Brittany wants to go check on LT. They walk out into the living room, still holding hands and see Quinn sitting on the couch with the kitten in her lap. Quinn looks back when she hears them walk in. "Seriously guys? Could you at least try to be just a little quiet? I had to hold his ears shut." She mimes covering LT's ears. Both of the girls start to blush, Brittany more obviously. "At least they have the good sense to be embarrassed." Quinn stage whispers to LT. They get over it and eventually find themselves all sitting on the couch watching some trashy television show while Lord Tubbington makes his rounds, leaving none of their laps empty for long.

Later that afternoon Brittany approaches Santana in the kitchen. "Hey baby. Want to go for a run?" Santana almost immediately agrees but then remembers that she really needs to talk to Quinn about something alone. She doesn't particularly like Brittany running alone though.

"You go. But stay close ok?"

"Always." Brittany kisses her on the cheek and goes to get changed.

After Brittany leaves Santana knocks on Quinn's bedroom door before pushing it open finding Quinn, not surprisingly, laying in bed and reading. "Hey Q. Can I talk to you?" Quinn looks up and thinks briefly about saying no or making some kind of joke but Santana looks serious. She pats the space next to her on the bed. Santana comes over but looks like she's having a hard time figuring out the words.

"Just tell me San. I can tell you're thinking hard about whatever it is."

Santana is scared to say these words out loud. It's something she's been thinking about since Brittany moved in. It's not something, other than talking about how it will happen some day, that she's said to anyone. She takes a deep breath. "I think I'm going to propose to Brittany." She looks over at Quinn, expecting her lack of response to mean she's stunned into silence. But really she just looks bored.

After a second Quinn's eyebrow raises. "…Oh. That's what you wanted to tell me?" She watches as Santana's eyes widen. "I've known since pretty much that first day you met that you guys were probably going to get married San. Everyone has. I'm pretty sure even you did." Santana smiles because maybe a little bit.

"But I'm thinking about asking her soon. Like in less than two months soon."

"Ok?"

"But don't you think it's too soon?" Santana had expected Quinn to talk her out of it. Not that she wanted to be talked out of it. But that's just the thing Quinn would have done. Told her they were still young. Still in college. Brittany was still a teenager. But Quinn was just looking at her like this news was in last weeks paper and Santana is the only person who hasn't read the article yet.

"Maybe with almost anyone else. I'm actually surprised you haven't done it yet. You've been looking at her like 'That's my wife, isn't she perfect!' for months now." Santana laughs, because Brittany is perfect and she knows what look Quinn is talking about. "Do you have the ring?"

"Not yet. But I'm pretty sure I've found the perfect one, and I'm going to get it customized a little bit. But I need to put the order in like next week if it's going to be ready in time. I was kind of wondering if maybe you would come with me to look at it?"

"Of course I will."

The timing works out perfectly a few days later because Quinn is taking the train to go see Rachel. Santana offers to give her a ride right when Brittany is about to get in the shower. "Be right back." She kisses Brittany's cheek before exchanging I love you's and they head out of the door.

When they get to the jewelers Santana gets more nervous. She thinks the ring is perfect, that it's the only possible ring she could picture on Brittany's finger. And she has done a lot of research on engagement rings. But what if Quinn hates it? What if she thinks Brittany will hate it? By the time they walk in her hands are shaking.

Quinn had barely ever noticed this jeweler before. But when they walk in she knows she'll be back. They have beautiful pieces in here. She notices as Santana nods to the woman behind the counter before walking right up to where the ring is. She points to it in the case. "That's the one, I think. Except I want more of those tiny diamonds like on that one so it will really sparkle." She almost whispers, her eyes reverent. Quinn notices how the woman behind the counter smiles fondly at Santana.

"How often do you come here?"

"Almost every time I'm out by myself. I just wanted to be sure. What do you think?" Quinn takes a minute to look at it. This isn't the kind of best friend advice you can rush. She looks at it for a bit and starts to feel her eyes prickle with tears when she imagines Santana giving it to Brittany. It's definitely the one.

"Yeah. It's perfect." She tells Santana honestly. Santana looks at the woman behind the counter.

"Ok. I'm ready to buy." The woman smiles and doesn't even have to tell Santana a price. They've apparently already discussed it as Santana writes out a check, hands it to the woman and thanks her for everything. Sometimes it really is that easy to make decisions that will change your whole life. Although she suspects the decision has been made for some time.

The rest of the summer was spent how summer began. By the pool, going for runs, going to the park, sex, and sleep. It was perfect and neither of them would have changed anything. They went back to visit Santana's parents the weekend before school started. She spent most of it preoccupied with whether or not she should tell her mom and dad that she was going to propose to Brittany. She knew exactly how she was going to do it, but maybe talking it through with her mom would help?

No. She had never been more sure of anything in her entire life. She could do this. She didn't want everyone to know except Brittany. She wanted to be able to tell people together and have them be surprised and excited.

When school started up things quickly became busy. It was similar to last year when they really only saw each other during the day at lunch. The major difference being that they now slept together every night. Waking up with Santana every morning made every day better, Brittany thought.

On the Wednesday night after school started they were laying in bed when Brittany brought up something that she had talked to Kurt about earlier that day. "Babe? Do you want to go to LGBTA again this year? I know we kind of stopped last year because we got busy but Kurt wants us to go. I figured we could at least until we get too busy. But if you don't want to that's fine. You're telling Kurt though." Brittany smirked. Santana shook her head and laughed.

"No we can go. It's nice to at least see everyone a few times. And I know Kurt will be glad we come now that he's president and all."

The next day they met up after classes to have dinner and head over to the meeting together. They walk into the meeting room together laughing because Brittany just managed to trip over her own feet. "You're so graceful baby." Santana joked as she picked a seat and sat down pulling Brittany onto her lap.

"Mhmm. Kiss." Brittany demanded, and Santana obliged. As soon as Brittany pulled back she saw Anna walk in talking to some girls she recognized but didn't know their names. She was pointing towards them and she could tell by the way she was looking over at them and the look on her face that she was talking about Santana. She felt anger course through her. This isn't going to happen again, not to Santana ever if she could help it. So without a thought other than protecting the love of her life, she got up off of Santana's lap and walked right over to Anna.

"Listen to me right now. This is done. It ends here. I don't care what your opinion is of my girlfriend or our relationship. But if I hear anything else you're going to be sorry. I'm so sick of this." She managed to remain calm but anger bubbled hot under her skin. "I promise you don't want to know what happens when you hurt the people I love." Brittany gave it a second to sink in and then walked away. She had no desire to embarrass or scare Anna. She just needed her to know that she was incredibly serious. She walked back over to Santana and sat next to her taking her hand on her lap and lacing their fingers together.

If it had been anyone else Santana would have been so embarrassed. Mad even. Short of that one time last year when Mercedes yelled at Anna, which she wasn't even there for, she had never let anyone fight her battles. Not on purpose. Sometimes her brothers did it but she always got angry at them for a while until she could rationally figure out that they always had her best interests in mind. But it didn't upset her to have Brittany do that. It made her feel loved and protected.

A few days later and two weeks before their anniversary, Santana brought it up to Brittany. She insisted that she get to plan it, making sure that Brittany could take Saturday off. Santana felt lucky that at the very least their anniversary fell on a Saturday which made a very stressful situation, slightly easier. She wouldn't be as limited with her planning.

On Friday evening she checked the reservations for the restaurant and the hotel. She packed them a bag for Sunday, mostly just clothes to drive home in, and made sure she had everything else that she needed. She was desperately trying not to let her anxiety show but she knew Brittany could feel something was off.

Originally Brittany had been sad that she didn't get to plan their anniversary. Or at least help. But Santana promised she could plan next year and Brittany could tell this was important to her. So she let it go, and was just excited for whatever it was that Santana had planned. Regardless of her excitement she could feel Santana's anxiety, and she could tell that she was trying to sneakily check and recheck her plans. She was torn between hating that Santana was ever anxious, and finding it endearing how important this was to her. They could order pizza and watch movies and it would be perfect to Brittany. Being with Santana was pretty much always perfect.

That night when they went to bed Brittany could tell, even after the triple checking, that Santana was worried about tomorrow. She wasn't going to get any sleep if she couldn't calm her down. As soon as Santana took her clothes off Brittany pulled her down into her arms and held her close, feeling Santana sigh into her. "I'm really excited for tomorrow." Brittany told her, and Santana tensed. "No matter what you've got planned, we get to celebrate us. That's perfect." She felt Santana ease into her a little and after many I love yous and many goodnight kisses they both managed to fall asleep.

When Santana woke up the next morning she almost forgets that she's so nervous she could throw up. Brittany is laying peacefully, still tangle all up with Santana. Even when it's hot, while they're asleep, Brittany manages to always find a way to make as much of her touch Santana as possible. She ran her fingers up Brittany's back enjoying the closeness. But too quickly, the anxiety settled back in.

Santana was thankful that their dinner reservations were early. They had to be in order for everything to work out. But the other side of that is that it gave her less time that day to be nervous. She couldn't figure out exactly why she was so nervous. She knew how today was going to turn out. She knew that by the end of today all of this will have felt ridiculous. But right now, she was completely freaked out. Santana stood in front of their closet trying to choose what to wear. She had thought of everything but this. The evening isn't even complicated. Dinner and a walk in the park, then back to the hotel. But none of that makes her feel better as she pulls on her tightest pair of compression shorts.

An hour later and a text from Brittany saying she was ready (she had gotten ready in Quinn's room) Santana was putting on the last touches of her lip gloss. She took a step back and smirked. If nothing else, she looked hot as hell. Her hair was tousled, her eyes smoky, and her dress red and tight (Brittany's favorite). She slipped on her back heels and went out to met her girlfriend. Brittany was wearing a dress Santana hadn't seen before. Brittany had bought it specifically for that night after finding out that they were going to a "dress worthy" restaurant. She wanted to look nice for Santana. It was blue and silver and sexy without being skin tight. It was short and flirty and she looked so amazing. Santana almost didn't want to leave their apartment. Almost.

The restaurant was fancy and probably too expensive but Santana didn't care, and other than a look Brittany gave her when she first opened the menu, she didn't bring up the prices either. Everything was perfect. It felt like pre-celebrating. Brittany for the evening, Santana for the rest of their lives. After dinner Brittany asked where they were going next. Santana was tempted to tell her to wait and see but there was a big enough surprise coming. "The park. Is that ok?"

Brittany was slightly confused as to why Santana would want to go to the park while they were both still dressed up and wearing heels. But this was Santana's plan, so she just smiled gently and nodded. The closer they got the more nervous Santana got and it bothered Brittany that she could see it but couldn't fix it. She knew whatever it was that she was nervous about was probably silly, but telling her that would downplay the surprise. And she didn't want to do that. So she took Santana's hand and let her closeness comfort her as much as she could.

When they arrived, Santana parked and took a deep breath. "Ready?" She watched for Brittany's answering nod before grabbing her clutch and getting out of the car. As soon as they met in front of it, Brittany was quick to take her hand again. They walked on the path, careful not to trip as they both were really wearing completely inappropriate shoes. And so long as Brittany didn't break her ankle, Santana didn't care. She hadn't thought of this detail, and she didn't care. There was too much going on in her mind.

Brittany kept looking around for something. She didn't know what specifically. The reason they were here she guessed. The reason that Santana was clinging to her hand like a lifeline. They liked parks. They frequented parks. This one was a particular favorite because it was kind of where they had their first sort of date. The lake came into view and with the sunset it looked beautiful. Brittany felt Santana's grip ease slightly.

When they got to what felt like the perfect spot Santana stopped Brittany and pulled her to face her. "I brought you here because I'm pretty sure this is where I fell in love with you. Sometimes I think it was the day I met you. But here, when we were talking, the day after that party and the first time you kissed me? This is when I knew. This has been a mess of a year if you think about it. A lot of bad stuff has happened. But when I think about it, it's still been the best year of my life." Santana was starting to tear up and she could tell Brittany was too. But she pressed forward.

"All I know is that I think we could have a lot more best years. I know we can. And the idea of living a life without you is too painful and unrealistic to think about." Santana took a deep breath. "I love you Brittany. More than anything in this world. More than I have ever thought possible for me to love another person." She reached into her clutch and pulled something out. She slowly got down on one knee. Brittany's face finally changing for unconcealed love to shock. "Stay with me forever Brittany." She choked out grabbing Brittany's hand again. Tears now falling freely from both girls eyes.

"Marry me?"

* * *

**AN:** It's a fluff hanger. You can't even call it a cliff hanger. So… one chapter left. Then some one shots. Then the sequel. Please ask questions. Review and let me know what you're thinking. One of my goals is to get better about responding to reviews. As in…do it at all. Thank you for all the reminders that I need to update. I hope this sufficed. Thank you to my beta as always. Follow me on tumblr for updates, information, and easier access to my brain if you have questions. Klikeszombies . tumblr . com


	27. Chapter 27

"Marry me?"

Brittany could see the ring vaguely through her tears. Her brain has definitely registered what is happening, but she can't force her mouth to form the appropriate words. She does the only thing she can and falls to her knees, landing roughly, and throws herself into Santana's arms.

Santana tries to catch her, soften the impact, but it happened so quick and now Brittany is sobbing yes's and I love you's into her neck. Santana knows for a fact that in this moment, she's the happiest person alive. Brittany pulls back slightly only to surge forward and kiss her with every ounce of passion she's feeling. And it's definitely not park appropriate but every one that can see them just watched what went down so she thinks they probably get it. When they pull back for air she wraps her arms tightly around Brittany's waist and kisses the crook of her neck. She can feel Brittany's breathing calm a little so loosens enough to look at her. "So yes then?" Brittany nods and sniffs her tears back again.

"A million yes's." Santana takes her hand and slides the ring onto her finger before kissing it. Brittany pulls her hand back and looks at the ring. "It's so beautiful. Perfect." She sighs a happy sigh before looking into Santana's eyes. "I love you so much." Neither girl has stopped crying but they're both just so happy. Someone walks towards them and then around giving them a concerned glance.

"Maybe we should head to the hotel." Santana laughs. Brittany agrees and Santana stands up first, reaching down to help Brittany up. "Let's go." Santana takes Brittany's hand, running her thumb over Brittany's finger, and the ring. It feels perfect.

They walk back to the car and Santana opens the door and helps Brittany into the car, kissing her once more before shutting the door. She can't believe how happy and huge her heart feels. She gets into the car and immediately takes Brittany's hand again. She ordinarily has a hard time not touching Brittany but now it's even harder. Like magnets. But she thinks it's understandable. They get to the hotel and check in and go up to the room. Brittany goes to sit down and hisses at the burning in her knees, which she hadn't noticed until just now. Santana looked over in alarm and was going to ask what was wrong when she saw a trickle of blood running down one leg and the other was also skinned up. "Britt..." She sighed pouting. "Let me get something to clean that up. Why didn't you tell me?"

"I didn't notice. I was kind of distracted." She looked down at her ring and smiled up at Santana adoringly. Santana walked over to Brittany and kissed her sweetly before walking out of the room. She came back moments later with some band aids, and alcohol pads. She goes to the bathroom and got a wash cloth, wetting it with warm water before coming to kneel in front of Brittany. She took time cleaning the blood away from each cut as gently as possible. Then she took the alcohol pads out of their packets.

"This is going to burn a little." She swiped the first pad over her right knee. Brittany jumped back at the burning. "Shhh I know. Almost done." The amount of care Santana was showing her was almost enough to distract her from the pain. She was being so gentle. After she was finished cleaning the cuts she put a bandaid over each knee and kissed them. "All better."

"I look like a ten year old. Who still skins their knees?"

"You definitely don't look like a ten year old. Not in that dress. I know I've told you but you look beautiful tonight."

"So do you. Tonight was perfect. It was..." her voice trailed off "it was everything." Santana wanted to respond but she didn't really have the words. So she took a step towards Brittany, who immediately recognizes the look in Santana's eyes and stands up. Their lips crash together and it's messy, but passionate. They eventually part, gasping for air. When they kiss this time it's slower, with more love, more care. Passion still burning deep in their bellies. Santana reaches down and takes the hem of Brittany's dress in her hands and pulls it up and over her head. She tosses the dress behind her and grips Brittany's waist. She could feel herself getting stiff and in compression shorts it was starting to get painful. She whimpered quietly in reaction to the discomfort.

Brittany knew immediately what was wrong and pulled away from the kiss. She pressed a kiss to Santana's forehead as she undid the zipper of her dress. She pulled it down and off of Santana before making quick work of taking the off her compression shorts. Santana sighed in relief as Brittany tenderly stroked the angry red lines. She felt Brittany start to sink to her knees and stopped her, pulling her back up. "Your knees Britt." Santana reminded her before kissing her again. She unhooked Brittany's bra and slid it off of her shoulders before quickly getting rid of her own, so she could press their bodies together. As soon as she did, they both made sounds of contentment.

"I love feeling you against me." Brittany spoke against her lips. Santana pulled Brittany's panties off and started walking her back towards the bed. She couldn't help but feel the need to be so gentle right now. This memory felt precious. Brittany felt it too. She reached down and gripped Santana's now mostly hard cock and stroked her to full hardness. She loves the way her touch changes the way Santana kisses her. Deeper. Fuller. Santana stops Brittany's hand.

"Bed." She husks out and it makes the heat in Brittany's belly burn hotter. She sits down and slides backwards to the pillows, laying down but maintaining eye contact with Santana. This is one of the ways she likes her best. Naked, unashamed, breasts heaving from deep breaths, and hard. She loves the effect she has on Santana. How badly she could tell Santana wants her. But Brittany wanted her just as bad. She didn't even need to touch Brittany and she was already wet. She let her legs fall open just slightly so Santana could see just how wet she was. Normally they would spend a lot of time building up. Brittany would have insisted when Santana tried to stop her from going down on her. She loved it. She loved how intimate it felt with Santana. But right now she just wanted Santana inside of her. She wanted to be as close to her as possible.

"I want you." She told Santana, and it sounded more desperate than she intended. But she was a little desperate. Santana crawled up the bed and laid flat on top of her. Brittany could feel her hardness pressed against her belly and she so badly wanted her inside. But then Santana's lips are pressed against hers and that's enough to distract her from almost anything. Until they part and the need is back but stronger. "Santana please. I need you." Santana nods and props herself up, Brittany wastes no time reaching between them and guiding Santana toward her entrance. Santana presses her hips forward and Brittany can't help but throw her head back at the feeling. No matter how many times they've made love she still feels herself stretching to accommodate Santana's size, every time. She loves it. She even loves the little pinch she feels when Santana is pressed all the way in, it doesn't hurt so much as it reminds Brittany that she's there, and that they are as close to each other as can be.

Santana starts rocking and thrusting into her and Brittany builds so quick that it surprises her. Everything about sex with Santana turns her on. The sounds she makes, the words whispered into her ear about how good she feels and how wet she is. The way she looks into her eyes before it gets to be too much and she squeezes them together. The way the room smells like them. The way it feels to be full, the hard thrusts juxtaposed with the gentle touches, the way their bodies come together with each thrust. It overwhelms her in the best possible way. In a way that she both never wants to end and feels like she might explode soon if it doesn't.

"So close baby." She pants into Santana's ear, running her fingers down her smooth tan back, feeling the muscles ripple underneath her skin. Santana kisses her and speeds her thrusting bringing them both so close to the edge. Brittany knows she wants them to come together. And just when Brittany thinks she can't take any more, Santana reaches between them and rolls her clit between two fingers and Brittany feels herself tighten, and explode. Her back arches and her leg wraps around Santana's hips locking their bodies together. She hears Santana moan her name and then she feels her hot cum spill into her. She whimpers and twitches with waves of aftershocks running through her body, clinging desperately to Santana as she rides out her orgasm. This is another one of her favorite ways to see Santana. Shaking and coming undone. She holds her tight, pressing as much of them together as she can. "I love you so much." She whispers into Santana's ear and feels her muscles loosen as she collapses on top of her.

"I love you too." Santana breathes out. Brittany shifts them to their sides, the motion causing Santana to slip out of her. She pouts for just a little at the empty feeling but smiles when Santana pulls her tight and cuddles into her They lay there for a few seconds before the glinting of her ring catches her eye.

"I can't believe you proposed." She says with awe in her voice. Santana smiles, nuzzling her nose into Brittany's skin.

"Yeah I did." Brittany smiles at the pride in Santana's voice.

"I was going to, you know." Santana propped herself up to look at Brittany.

"You were?"

"Mhmm. I was saving up for a ring. I hadn't thought of how yet though."

"I was going to plan more." Santana admits. " Make it more grand. But then once I actually had the ring in my hand I thought maybe that wouldn't be what you wanted."

"I loved everything about the way it happened. It was perfect. Absolutely. But I'm still buying you a ring." Santana smiles even bigger.

"Really?"

"Of course. I want people to know you're spoken for. Plus…" Brittany shrugged nonchalantly. "I like it. So I'm gonna put a ring on it." Santana started laughing before she collapsed next to Brittany.

"Roll over. I want to hold my fiancé" Their hearts both skipped at the word.

"I like that."

"Me too." Santana tickled her fingers across Brittany's belly. "Do you like the ring?" There was a shyness in her voice that only Brittany ever got to hear. Brittany held her hand out in front of her so they could both see the ring.

"It's the most beautiful ring I've ever seen. I honestly couldn't have picked a better one for myself." Santana kissed Brittany's shoulder and neck while she spoke.

"I love it too. It's even prettier on you than it was in the store." She reached out and Brittany linked her hand with Santana's. She folded their arms so she was holding Brittany tight. They lay there in relative silence, Santana kissing Brittany's back randomly and starting to nearly drift off to sleep. She was just about to tell her goodnight when she felt Brittany's body shake against hers slightly. She held her breath, hoping that it was just a sleep tremor, even though she knew it wasn't. As soon as she felt it again she tightened her hold on Brittany. "What's wrong baby?"

"I'm sorry." Brittany sniffed back. "I don't even know why I'm crying. I think I just spent so much time being positive I would never have this kind of happiness. And sometimes I still can't believe I'm here. And that I have you." Brittany rolled over in Santana's arms so their fronts were completely pressed together and they were holding each other. She buried her face into Santana's neck. "Sometimes I get scared I'm going to wake up and you will have just been the most wonderful dream I'll ever have."

"I felt the same way. That I would find someone and fall in love but they would never accept my body. But I think we were meant for each other. I really do Brittany. And I can't believe we have the rest of our lives to feel like this. You're definitely not dreaming." Brittany sobs into Santana's neck a few more times before pulling away and pressing a very wet kiss into her lips. "I'll spend the rest of my life making you happy, I promise."

"Me too. But that's what being engaged means doesn't it? Making that promise?" Santana nods.

"We're going to get married Britt." She smiles her biggest smile. The one that, without fail, takes Brittany's breath away every time.

"We are." She kisses Santana's cheeks, and then nose, and then lips before settling against her as close as they could possibly be. "Love you so much Santana."

"Love you too Britt." And then the only sound was their breathing as they fell asleep.

Santana wakes up in the best way possible, Brittany on top of her kissing her face. "You're awake!" Brittany realizes.

"And good thing." She pulls Brittany closer and kisses her smiling. Just before things start to get heated, a thought occurs to her. "We have to tell my parents."

"Mmm." Brittany hums distractedly, kissing Santana's jaw, down to her neck. It was almost enough to distract her.

"No. Focus. Babe. We have to tell my parents."

"What?" Santana gestures to her ring. "Oh." She smiles. "They don't know?" Brittany sits up, straddling Santana's waist. Santana is distracted once again because now she could see her very naked, very beautiful fiancé. Brittany smirks, knowing exactly what Santana is thinking. She grabs the sheet and pulls it so it covers her body. "Now you focus."

Santana shakes her head to clear her mind again. "Sorry. But you can't blame me. Anyway. They know in like a general sense. But they don't know I actually asked you. We have to tell them. My mom is already going to be mad we didn't call last night."

"We were busy." Brittany bites her bottom lip.

"I know. But you know her. We should call."

"Or…. We could just go visit? Neither of us have homework and it's not that far. It would mean a lot to your mom."

"But I kind of wanted to spend the day in bed with you." Santana pouts, running her hands up Brittany's thighs.

"San." Brittany smacks her hand and pouts right back. "They would be happier if we went to see them. This is big." And Santana knew Brittany was right. It was big. The biggest. Plus Brittany was always right. But she was semi-hard right now and really didn't want to leave this room. But that pout…

"Fine." Brittany claps her hands causing the sheet to fall and Santana to groan. She rolls her eyes and grabs the phone from the night stand. Santana dials the house number. "Hey Mami. Brittany and I were wondering if we could come up for dinner. It's just a nice day for a drive." She could feel Brittany starting to scoot down her body. "Have the boys come up too. It will be fun. Things are about to start getting busy so I don't know when we will be able to come up again. Four sounds good. See you soon." Santana hangs up the phone and looks down at Brittany. "What are you doing babe?"

"I want to take care of this before we go." She felt Brittany gently cup her balls before sinking the rest of the way down and taking her into her mouth.

After spending more time in bed than they should have, they quickly shower before heading back to their apartment to change. Quinn must have been in the living room waiting for them, because as soon as they opened the door she attacks them. "I am so happy for you guys! I can't believe it! Let me see the ring Britt." She grabs Brittany's hand and looks at the ring closely.

"Quinn is the only person who knew in advance. I needed someone to tell." Brittany kisses her to show she understands.

"It's been so hard not to say something to anyone. Guys! You're engaged!" She claps again. "And home earlier than I expected."

"We're going to go tell San's family next." Brittany beamed.

"Your mom is going to die." Santana agrees and tells her they'll tell friends soon so Quinn can stop keeping the news from Rachel, before going back to the bedroom to get changed.

The drive was spent, for the most part, in a comfortable silence. Random singing along to the radio, declarations of love, and Brittany pointing out every animal she saw was the only noise. Santana was holding Brittany's hand, occasionally playing with her ring. "You're going to have to take this off till we tell them." She taps the ring, glancing over at Brittany to see her reaction. She scrunches up her face in clear disapproval of the idea. Just as Santana suspected.

"Is it weird that I already don't want to take it off?" Brittany asks spinning the ring a few times on her finger.

"No. I don't want you to take it off, either. But you know my mom." Brittany nods.

"Definitely. She'll see it before we even get out of the car. I have pockets in this dress. It will be safe." But she knows she won't be able to stop checking anyway. When they get there, Santana can tell her mother is suspicious of something. It's almost funny. But she wants to wait till everyone gets there to tell them. Her brothers arrive shortly after that and everyone is happy to see them. Santana can barely deal with how happy she is in general. She tries to dial it down for appearances sake, some things are only for Brittany to see, but she suspects she fails a little by the raised eyebrows that keep getting sent in her direction from various family members. They sit down to eat and she knows, really, the appropriate time to make this kind of announcement would be at the end of dinner. But her mom keeps looking down at them and Brittany keeps putting her hand in her pocket like all she wants is to put the ring back on.

"Put the ring on baby. We're going to tell them." Santana leans over and whispers. Brittany looks back at her like that's the most exciting news ever. "So, guys. I wanted you all to come to dinner because I wanted to tell you something all together." She paused to prepare herself. "We're engaged!" It took her mother less than a second to get over to them. Santana honestly isn't sure she didn't jump over the table. But she and Brittany are being squeezed together in her arms and they are all crying. And her mom is speaking some crazy not English not Spanish and it's all perfect. Her mom pulls back kissing her face several times before switching focus to Brittany. Her dad wraps her up next, telling her he's so happy and so proud, his eyes swimming with tears and if she hadn't already been, Santana would have started crying.

More hugs, being lifted into the air several times, and kisses later they were all seated and eating their slightly cold food. No one even noticed though. They all oohed and awed over the ring, and her mother teared up when they talked about the proposal. "So when is the wedding?" Diego asks.

"We haven't really talked about it yet. We've been engaged for less than twenty-four hours." Santana tells him. She had thought about it, and they had vaguely discussed it a few months ago. The summer after Brittany graduates was something they had both thought might be a good idea, but they hadn't talked about it in any kind of official way.

"I'm sure the Lopez-Pierce wedding will be beautiful whenever it is." Antonio speaks up.

"Just Lopez." Brittany corrects easily before realizing what she said and getting slightly shy. "We have talked about that." Santana takes her hand as Brittany speaks and her eyes go to her mother who looked like she was going to cry again. "I know who my family is." Brittany adds softly, talking to everyone, but looking at Santana. Santana couldn't stop herself from leaning over to kiss her. A chorus of awws (and a few gags) erupt around them.

Maribel brings out dessert and sits back down letting everyone serve themselves. She had something on her mind that she needed to say. "I have to be honest, I was positive you were going to tell us you were pregnant mija." A short pause and then "You aren't, are you Brittany?"

"Nope. We're not there yet." Brittany answers easily over Santana's groaned "Mami!"

"Good. Because I want grand babies. But after you're ready. And Married."

"We know Mami. We know." The rest of dinner went wonderfully, and they left that evening feeling happy and loved.

Somehow for Santana, telling their friends was even more nerve wracking than her family. She didn't want them to judge or dismiss something that makes them so happy. They knew that telling people is a never ending process, but they did want the bulk of their friends to find out at once. So they organized a game night for Tuesday night and thankfully everyone could make it. Brittany announced it this time and the reactions of their friends could not have been better. They were all so happy and excited for them. They talked about where the wedding should be and demanded an open bar. Rachel, expectedly, yelled at Quinn for not finding a way to tell her. The games lay forgotten as they happily talked late into the night.

When everyone finally did leave after more congratulations and more hugs, Santana and Brittany stumbled into bed completely exhausted. They took their clothes off and cuddled close. "So the summer after you graduate?" Santana asks.

"Is that what you want?"

"I think so. Moving on from college with our life as a married couple seems kind of perfect."

"I agree." Brittany really would have gone out the next day and eloped but she knew weddings were a big deal in Santana's family. So time to plan was important. She was just starting to nod off when she heard Santana timidly call her name. "Hmm?"

"Did you mean it? About taking my last name?"

"Of course baby." Brittany replies as if it made all the sense in the world. Because to her, it did. "You and your family are my family." She cuddles into Santana's chest closer.

"Perfect. Future Mrs. Brittany Lopez." She felt Brittany smile into her skin. They both fell asleep dreaming of weddings and families and beautiful things to come.

The End. (sort of.)

* * *

AN: So. That's it. As I posted on tumblr, I'm not giving you guys a timeline of when the one shots/next story is going to be posted because we know I'm awesome at sticking to deadlines. It might be a little while. Do some no pressure writing to build up a few chapters so i can maybe keep it on a more regular schedule.

But more important than that

I hope you guys enjoyed it. I hope it made you happy. I hope you're excited for the next part of the journey. I know my beta and I are. I can't thank all of you enough. And I can't thank my beta enough. It feels a little weird to check that Completed box knowing there's still so much more to come. See you there. : )

K


End file.
